KOCHSUCKER  9:25 am July 26, 2011

Voter ID Law Passed, Scott Walker Moves to Close DMVs in Dem Districts

by Kirsten Boyd Johnson

The three branches of Wisconsin government.Evil corporate lackey Scott Walker recently got a memo on his desk from the fringe conservative Koch-funded  American Legislative Exchange Council, an organization that drafts bills for GOP lawmakers who are too stupid or too lazy to pen the enormous quantities of the Kochs’ slobbering hate for the poor into formal legislative proposals. The memo that Walker got sent him some instructions like, “there are too many minority people and students voting in your state,” along with the text of a voter ID bill pooped out by the typing monkeys from the Koch offices. Thus a Walker “legislative priority” was conceived and excreted onto the people of Wisconsin. Hooray! Now, no one can vote without a state-issued ID. Can Scott Walker go it one further? He wants to pass another law ordering the Department of Transportation to shut down up to 16 DMV offices that a Democratic lawmaker says are located in blue districts, while it would extend hours at offices in GOP areas.

From the AP:

Gov. Scott Walker’s administration is working on finalizing a plan to close as many as 16 offices where people can obtain driver’s licenses, in order to expand hours elsewhere and come into compliance with new requirements that voters show photo IDs at the polls.

One Democratic lawmaker said Friday it appeared the decisions were based on politics, with the department targeting offices for closure in Democratic areas and expanding hours for those in Republican districts.

A high-ranking state Department of Transportation official rejected that claim, saying the changes were based on economics, not politics.

Rep. Andy Jorgensen, D-Fort Atkinson, called on the DOT to reconsider its plants to close the Fort Atkinson DMV center. The department plans to expand by four hours a week the hours of a center about 30 minutes away in Watertown.

When is that recall election available again? [AP/ Crooks and Liars]

 
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{ 209 comments }

Barb July 26, 2011 at 9:26 am

It's too bad that stupidity isn't painful.

missemish July 26, 2011 at 9:28 am

And it's too bad it's painful for us, also.

PuckStopsHere July 26, 2011 at 9:29 am

It is. Only not to the stupid person. Everybody else feels immense discomfort.

Serolf_Divad July 26, 2011 at 9:36 am

Evil, I'm afraid is not the same as stupid.

JustPixelz July 26, 2011 at 9:37 am

Ouch! You hurt me with your word things.

jodyleek July 26, 2011 at 9:42 am

Apparently, it is painful for Michele Bachmann. Tee hee.

Chillwaver July 26, 2011 at 10:23 am

GOP voters, you mean? Speaking of stupidity, I just now noticed: when did they get rid of downfist buttons???

Barb July 26, 2011 at 10:36 am

The downfist button went away yesterday.

jus_wonderin July 26, 2011 at 10:54 am

Cool! I didn't notice that. Maybe troll will have to actually comment/debate now. That would be fun.

Callyson July 26, 2011 at 10:56 am

I wouldn't count on that: have you seen the idiot trolls who comment on HuffPo? But I'll settle for them going away in a sulk…

Doktor Zoom July 26, 2011 at 11:17 am

Even better, Spanky2b was kicked off IntenseDebate for TOS violations. If he comes back with a new account, he's going to have to behave himself.

AJWjr. July 26, 2011 at 11:42 am

I dunno, he was still alive and posting 21 hours ago as his dumb old self.
Even more fun, you can go there and downfist away to your heart's content without any reprisals…

Callyson July 26, 2011 at 10:55 am

They got rid of those? Thank you, Wonkette!

ifthethunderdontgetya July 26, 2011 at 9:27 am

Your move, Rick Scott.

You don't want to be out-evil henchmaned, do you?
~

freakishlywrong July 26, 2011 at 10:14 am

He's already being sued for his awful "disenfranchise everyone but whitey" law.

PsycWench July 26, 2011 at 10:35 am

"Your move, Rick Scott Voldemort."

SpurningBeer July 26, 2011 at 11:31 am

Governor Scott will be introducing bills in the next legislative term that would require voters to present a Glamor Shot and two signed and notarized statements that the person is white before registering to vote.

PuckStopsHere July 26, 2011 at 9:28 am

It's still better than the original plan which was to tattoo drivers license #'s onto the arms of Democrats.

FNMA July 26, 2011 at 9:33 am

Brwando has what plant's crave.

FraAnima July 26, 2011 at 9:34 am

Yellow Donkeys are still to be sewn to their clothes tho.

Callyson July 26, 2011 at 10:58 am

Which, oddly enough, would all be given the same number by Scotty, to deflect attention away from his true master:
666STN

MLHencken July 26, 2011 at 9:28 am

Scott Walker: "I am not doing that thing which you just caught me doing."

horsedreamer_1 July 26, 2011 at 9:40 am

Noted Conservative Bil Keane approves this message.

freakishlywrong July 26, 2011 at 9:43 am

Ida Know is on board as well..

WinterOuthouse July 26, 2011 at 9:29 am

Walker for preznit. He's a shit bomb and the Gee Oh Pee luvs a nice sticky shit bomb

ifthethunderdontgetya July 26, 2011 at 9:29 am

A high-ranking state Department of Transportation official rejected that claim, saying the changes were based on economics, not politics.

"Fuck off, libunatics!", the official added.
~

Ruhe July 26, 2011 at 9:48 am

"It's not politics, it's economics. Is it our problem that the blacks and hispanics are poor and live in poor districts where the DMV service can't turn a profit? Not it is not, so fuck off."

mrblifil July 26, 2011 at 10:02 am

ERRATUM: an earlier report stated "A high-ranking state Department of Transportation official rejected that claim, saying the changes were based on economics, not politics.

If should have read: "A high-ranking state Department of Transportation official rejected that claim, saying the changes were based on economics, not politics, punctuating the statement with wild hip gesticulations and two-handed miming intended to suggest the masturbation of a whale penis."

Biel_ze_Bubba July 26, 2011 at 10:24 am

What eco-fucking-nomics??? They're closing what, the least profitable DMV offices?
I bet there are some unprofitable welfare and unemployment offices they can cherry-pick, too.
When does that recall election get underway … this giant walking prick needs to be tossed out on his fat teabagger ass, ASAP.

Lascauxcaveman July 26, 2011 at 11:43 am

If it's a matter of economics, I can help them, I've got a great idea. Put an expresso/soft serve ice cream bar in the entrance of every unprofitable DMV. Who doesn't love a tasty soft-serve cone while they're waiting in line at the DMV? Nobody, that's who.

Pay for itself in 4 months. After that, it all gravy.

NorthStarSpanx July 26, 2011 at 9:29 am

The Black Panthers are really going to stand out against those Republican DMV strong-holds.

Come here a minute July 26, 2011 at 9:30 am

Hey Wonkett, seems voter fraud is funny to you. #kneejerkconservative

Arken July 26, 2011 at 9:34 am

Hey, I laugh every time Mugabe is 're-elected.'

Serolf_Divad July 26, 2011 at 9:37 am

No such thing as voter fraud if no one gets to vote in the first place.

gvvt July 26, 2011 at 10:00 am

Voter fraud is indeed a TERRIBLE problem in Wisconsin. You can see the havoc it has caused in the makeup of the current state government.

horsedreamer_1 July 26, 2011 at 10:15 am

Kathy Nickolaus has ballot-bags at the ready almost as ugly as the bags under her eyes.

Pragmatist2 July 26, 2011 at 9:30 am

The next phase is to have all DMV offices located at country clubs` in the Members Only area.

horsedreamer_1 July 26, 2011 at 9:41 am

& Iranian voter-fraud will go thru the roof. Like their fission attempts.

Andrew Drinker July 26, 2011 at 9:42 am

In the Stag Grille. Can't have wimminz voting either!

ThundercatHo July 26, 2011 at 9:31 am

What? They're still letting Democrats vote? WTF? Somebody's really dropping the ball here.

Seriously tho, it's time for torches and pitchforks, people (and cheese curds and beer)

MLHencken July 26, 2011 at 9:32 am

Apropos of nothing, I wonder why is it that Democrats are never so at ease with this sort of thing?

GOP operatives do seem to go on with this sort of gerrymandering so effortlessly. But when ACORN just tries to (by and large) register actual eligible voters, we get Shelly Crazy-Eyez yelling at Barney Frank:

"IT'S A CONSPIRACY! DEFUND ACORN! AMEROS! MIGRAINES!"

mrblifil July 26, 2011 at 9:58 am

The phenomenon you describe is largely dependent upon which narratives receive broad distribution in the cultural atmosphere wherein our politics reside. Which means such decisions are left to the goat-fucking teenage murder victim defilers running our world. Thanks for giving me the opportunity to clear that up.

horsedreamer_1 July 26, 2011 at 10:01 am

Which reminds me: I was watching Question Time on CSPAN on Sunday — obviously, re-run — & I felt terribly sorry for Nick Clegg, sitting glumly behind Cameron on the PM's right-side, knowing the fool's bargain he was alleged to have made to install the LDP in the governing coalition was proving correct (if as well for reasons independent of those cited, at the time).

How much longer before he torpedos the whole thing, leaves the coalition, & triggers a no confidence vote?

mrblifil July 26, 2011 at 11:01 am

How much longer? Long enough to secure himself some cushion when the shit comes down. And not a minute longer… When your best friend hacked a dead girl's cell phone, which the police did nothing about (other than considering her dad a prime suspect for a while), you start to look for new friends.

horsedreamer_1 July 26, 2011 at 11:10 am

Sadly, I don't see the LDP polling well in a do-over election — too much heat for enabling the Conservatives, who, even having only to beat the milquetoast Gordon Brown, still could not win an outright majority — so Clegg's cushion will have to be in the private sector. & being he's from a third party, with Europhilic tendencies, I don't know what private concern in the UK would have him.

But at least we might get Home Secretary or Chancellor of the Exchecquer Balls out of the deal, once Labour comes roaring back.

MLHencken July 26, 2011 at 11:07 am

Oh, you're quite welcome sir.

Biel_ze_Bubba July 26, 2011 at 10:32 am

It's too bad there's no way to test for the presence of a functioning conscience, as a prerequisite for electoral office.

Although, if we could, the 'baggers and Kochsuckers would probably concoct some reason it was a violation of their Constitutional rights. "Amoral assholes are entitled to representation," and/or something about freedom of religion (since being an asshole is an unavoidable consequence of their religious beliefs.)

Beowoof July 26, 2011 at 9:32 am

I am in awe of the douche baggery of this move. Has anyone in the American electorate noticed what these guys are up to. Nah.

Sue4466 July 26, 2011 at 9:40 am

Or they've noticed and rationalized it as necessary to stop the "rampant voter fraud ™" that goes on in the talking points of the GOP.

mrblifil July 26, 2011 at 11:02 am

Well, yuh! That's why they are attacking the elections system. People have noticed, and they'll really notice when they show up to vote and are turned away by cops.

Beowoof July 26, 2011 at 5:45 pm

That's my biggest fear, no one will notice till they show up to vote and been told they cant vote.

slowhansolo July 26, 2011 at 2:15 pm

Naked transparency is the best cover when you're engaged in something completely unbelievable.

Allmighty_Manos July 26, 2011 at 9:33 am

How about they make WI voters take a test on their knowledge of the state constitution? Yeah I know that is illegal, but it would give Scalia and Thomas a great opportunity to strike down the Voting Rights Act since the GOP is so eager to repeal the 20th century.

Ruhe July 26, 2011 at 9:50 am

"Repeal the 20th Century" is perhaps the most insightful phrase I've ever seen on Wonkette. Well said. Can I get a T-shirt?

elviouslyqueer July 26, 2011 at 11:03 am

But if Scalia and Thomas vote to repeat the 20th century, wouldn't that revert darling Clarence to the status of obligatory house negro? Oh, wait.

pdiddycornchips July 26, 2011 at 12:31 pm

Between this doofus in WI and Bachmann in Minn. I wonder about voter fraud myself. The people of these two great states are generally agreeable and not insane. At least the ones I'm familiar with. I think they are busing in wingnuts from trailer parks down south. Since the real WI/Minn. folks are so non-confrontational, they simply let them vote and offer them freshly baked pie.

Sue4466 July 26, 2011 at 9:35 am

The Wonkette headline isn't even joking. They're that fucking transparent. These defenders of freedom and liberty.

ManchuCandidate July 26, 2011 at 9:40 am

Freedumz and liberty is for Kochsuckers only.

BarryOPotter July 26, 2011 at 10:17 am

I'm not a lawyerin' guy, but how the hell are these actions not crossing the line into the land of voter suppression and civil rights violations?

Biel_ze_Bubba July 26, 2011 at 10:34 am

You can't cross a line when it's miles behind you.

BarryOPotter July 26, 2011 at 10:39 am

Good point…

GOPCrusher July 26, 2011 at 12:53 pm

You would think the Holder DOJ would be looking into something like this, wouldn't ya?

Sue4466 July 26, 2011 at 9:37 am

"A high-ranking state Department of Transportation official rejected that claim, saying the changes were based on economics, not politics."

He says that as if economics and politics aren't the same thing. It's the economics of who donates most to Republicans.

BarryOPotter July 26, 2011 at 10:21 am

He says that as if economics and politics aren't the same thing.

True. In Econ, I learned that economics is politics, and in PoliSci, I learned that politics is economics, ergo, Wisconsin's state leaders are jerks, liars, fellators and really bad eggs…

Doktor Zoom July 26, 2011 at 10:45 am

Apparently the Walker Administration appoints top departmental officials based on their ability to keep a straight face while saying things like that.

weejee July 26, 2011 at 9:38 am

All you Wisconsin libtards who will be heading out to walk yer dogs, send your poo bags to Governor Dan Walker, 115 East Capitol, Madison, WI 53702

MissusBarry July 26, 2011 at 9:53 am

I have some dog poo I'd be happy to provide for non-dog owners.

gvvt July 26, 2011 at 10:01 am

He needs material for more legislation.

YasserArraFeck July 26, 2011 at 10:22 am

Oh great – the start of the rise of the "Poo Party", known colloquially as the "Poo Baggers". Remember: "All Politics is Fecal"

not that Dewey July 26, 2011 at 10:26 am

This Dan Walker?

weejee July 26, 2011 at 10:32 am

His ghost lives in Scott. Had to deal with that Dan for years when living in Illinois, hence the subconscious typo.

not that Dewey July 26, 2011 at 10:37 am

We saw him eating hot dogs at ChicagoFest one year. I was young, but my dad recognized him, knew of his corruption, and ironically asked him for an autograph. We still have it, somewhere.

I see it as less of a typo, and more a "ghost of xmas future" kind of thing.

fuflans July 26, 2011 at 12:10 pm

do you know if the good people of WI are sick of this douchebag yet?

i could type something in the googles but i much prefer concise wonketteer responses…

donner_froh July 26, 2011 at 9:38 am

"…too stupid or lazy" covers 100% of the GOP elected officials in state legislatures or elsewhere.

Actually if covers most to the democrats as well.

ManchuCandidate July 26, 2011 at 9:39 am

It's not even evil kind of evil, but a petty chickenshit kind of evil you get from simple minds. Oh you silly Cheezheads. Anywhere else, Koch Walker Cocksucker would have just put the browns/blacks and liebruls in camps.

mrblifil July 26, 2011 at 9:54 am

It's actually quite brilliant, evaluated on it's own terms. They pretty well know they will not be able to rescue Walker from recall, especially if they push the state's teachers to shut down schools for the fall. I'm sure they have a barrage of parting FUs planned. I think they're still trying to exact revenge for the humiliation Kevin Bacon's character endured in Animal House.

ManchuCandidate July 26, 2011 at 10:04 am

Yeah, but bureaucratic inertia being what it is… that takes time. Time that Koch Sucker doesn't have.

horsedreamer_1 July 26, 2011 at 10:17 am

Or, for that matter, Charles Koch doesn't have. For all the money he has, that cancer isn't going to get cured. Remission, maybe; maybe he'll be to cancer what Earvin Johnson is to HIV. But, in the end, it will break him.

BaldarTFlagass July 26, 2011 at 11:32 am

*Breaks into Will Ferrell/Cheri Oteri routine*

Go Cancer!! Go Cancer!!!

Biel_ze_Bubba July 26, 2011 at 10:38 am

The word you're looking for is "banality".

FraAnima July 26, 2011 at 9:39 am

Next: Poll taxes to be reinstated.

MissusBarry July 26, 2011 at 9:54 am

Eh, really, they were…ID's aren't free.

PsycWench July 26, 2011 at 10:32 am

Next, literacy tests that are based on Fox News reports. Not the Bible, because black people can beat them at actual Bible.

DahBoner July 26, 2011 at 1:59 pm

How many beans in that jar, boy?

BlueMonkeh July 26, 2011 at 2:30 pm

Considering how much many local governments (state, county, etc.) are raising the fees paid to get a state ID, it's already happened in spades.

V572 Hair of Destiny July 26, 2011 at 9:39 am

"A high-ranking state Department of Transportation official…" Ha ha, a high-ranking DMV guy so important she has to speak on background. Way to go after that story, AP! You can tell us: was it Patty or Selma?

BaldarTFlagass July 26, 2011 at 9:41 am

Man, the shits just keep on comin'.

weejee July 26, 2011 at 10:10 am

"Zactly. To reverse the course of this river see the poop bag proposal, above.

Dudleydidwrong July 26, 2011 at 11:45 am

It's a great world. Just when I think they've tried every douchbag trick imaginable they outdo themselves and descend into deeper and deeper baggery. Industrial roach spray in 55 gallon drums will be necessary, applied along with pitchforks and torches.

JustPixelz July 26, 2011 at 9:42 am

I haven't looked at the details in other states, but here in Joe-mentum Connecticut, it costs like $150 to get a driver's license. Plus about $1,000,000 in lost wages in line at the DMV. Money I could have used to create jobs. Anyway am I the only one who sees a de facto poll tax in these laws? Oh, I forget the Supreme Court says its OK to charge people to vote by calling it a "voter ID" requirement.

Ruhe July 26, 2011 at 9:54 am

There is a fee for obtaining a driver's license. A driver's license is required for voting. Ergo the DMV fee is a defacto poll tax.
That, sir, is logical, rational thinking and as any man will admit Kochs and rationality do not mix well.

mookwrthwilson July 26, 2011 at 10:34 am

Actually…and I hate Voter ID laws BTW (its a solution looking for a problem) but the WI DMV will issue free ID cards for voting purposes…:

Free Wisconsin ID cards for voting
A free ID card is available under Wisconsin law to anyone who:

will be at least 18 years of age on the date of the next election and;
requests an ID card for the purpose of voting.

Biel_ze_Bubba July 26, 2011 at 10:42 am

Just go to your nearest not-yet-shuttered DMV office… the one in the white Republican district, on the other side of the freeway.

mookwrthwilson July 26, 2011 at 10:58 am

Yep…I know…it's still bullshit…even with the free cards…

horsedreamer_1 July 26, 2011 at 11:15 am

Let's see if the Pewaukee Police allow them to get that far.

horsedreamer_1 July 26, 2011 at 9:44 am

This would still seem to be (much) less than compliant with Motor Voter — from which Wisconsin was exempted, in the mid-nineties, due to the allowance for same-day-as-election, polling-station registration; & it saved us money, too, since funds did not need to be allocated to DMV for voter registration (& considering we are in such a deficit hole, thus necessitating the end of collective bargaining, why…) — so I see a federal suit being a strong possibility.

mrblifil July 26, 2011 at 11:07 am

Personally I think they are setting the stage to have all state election results thrown out, beginning with the first recall elections that actually start removing Republicans from office.

Mumbletypeg July 26, 2011 at 9:44 am

From the AP:

… state budget requires that DMV driver license and ID card services be offered in all 72 counties at least 20 hours a week. Currently, only 30 counties have offices that meet that 20-hour requirement.

Thus a [non?]-Walker “legislative priority” was conceived and excreted Koch-blocked? Fitz-aborted? suffocated in the nearest bathtub? Must be the latter in the name of government "transparency": motives stand out in stark relief but instead of accountability their fruits are weighed for drownability.

Biel_ze_Bubba July 26, 2011 at 10:49 am

"Currently, only 30 [of 72] counties have offices that meet that 20-hour requirement."

Anyone care to hazard a guess about the extent of coverage in GOP/conservatard districts?

freakishlywrong July 26, 2011 at 9:45 am

Shit. Between this and the Diebold riggings, Dubya will win again!

comrad_darkness July 26, 2011 at 10:01 am

With the debt ceiling debacle, I wake up in the morning and swear he did.

freakishlywrong July 26, 2011 at 10:17 am

Excellent point. Too bad all this shit he caused doesn't keep HIM up at night.

horsedreamer_1 July 26, 2011 at 10:18 am

All the souffle is very somnabulizing.

gvvt July 26, 2011 at 10:03 am

as a machine write-in

Biel_ze_Bubba July 26, 2011 at 10:50 am

I'm pretty sure they'll get around to reprogramming the machines.

Sue4466 July 26, 2011 at 9:45 am

I know we're all freaked by the impending debt ceiling fueled economic meltdown that will destroy the country, but this kind of scheming seems like a larger threat to democracy.

horsedreamer_1 July 26, 2011 at 9:57 am

The pit of my stomach is turning over, & over, & over. I have to think: I survived a dissected aneurysm on my ascending aortic root, for this, this teabagging nonsense?

Don't worry: I'm not going to abide the spirit of my favourite Armenian, Dr. Jack, but — it's disheartening. Seriously. I cannot get over how little value for a (good) life some people have. & all because The Other might get good, too.

comrad_darkness July 26, 2011 at 10:03 am

Word. In any form of government, the threat of being voted out of office is the thin thread that holds the rest of the shit pile in some semblance of non-abusive functionality.

tihond July 26, 2011 at 9:45 am

The appropriate Democrat response to this would be to require an opening to small for SUVs to fit through at each polling place parking lot when they're back in power.

Biel_ze_Bubba July 26, 2011 at 10:55 am

Screw the parking. Make it necessary to walk. Disabled Dems should be happy to vote by mail, knowing the net benefit.

OC_Surf_Serf July 26, 2011 at 9:45 am

Keep jacking up gas prices and soon enough only "job creators" can afford to drive (or vote) anyways.

BaldarTFlagass July 26, 2011 at 9:47 am

Remain calm. All is well.

DashboardBuddha July 26, 2011 at 9:47 am

Words fail…this latest stunt just takes my breath away.

mrblifil July 26, 2011 at 9:51 am

That's the point. That's what they live for. For some reason the modern conservative troglodyte loves nothing more than the possibility that somehow somewhere a liberal is punching a wall. If there were a way to artificially produce the endorphin rush, we would have a repeat of the crack epidemic of the eighties, except this time it would be restricted to the doughy white boy community and the women who are forced to fuck them.

MissusBarry July 26, 2011 at 9:58 am

Well, they should be exploding from the endorphin rush of my anger alone.

horsedreamer_1 July 26, 2011 at 10:05 am

I thought the GOP had those, already; or did people stop doing poppers, at the Log Cabin?

DashboardBuddha July 26, 2011 at 10:06 am

One thing though…Our governor here in Maine is cut from the same cloth as Walker. Watching these shenanigans has make my hyper-alert to the same thing here. Just try it, Lepage…just fucking try it.

horsedreamer_1 July 26, 2011 at 10:20 am

La Page, no? Has anyone accused him of being a Quebecois anchor-baby, to allow for the military wing of the separatists to plot against Canada on U.S. soil?

Où est le certificat de naissance, Paul?

Dudleydidwrong July 26, 2011 at 11:55 am

Knowing Mainers as I do I'd like to believe that if Paul LePew tried something like that he'd be boiled in a lobster pot. But I fear that such shit will be tried in Maine, Minnesota, Arizona, and the states of the old Confederacy and this generation will just be thankful that the NFL season hasn't been canceled. Bread and circuses.

Andrew Drinker July 26, 2011 at 9:48 am

Wow, he's making Ken "Put The Broken Voting Machines In Urban Precincts" Blackwell look good.

Allmighty_Manos July 26, 2011 at 10:07 am

Blackwell at least let you in the voting booth before stealing your ballot.

Monsieur_Grumpe July 26, 2011 at 9:49 am

Thank Dog Wisconsin is downwind from me.

mrblifil July 26, 2011 at 9:49 am

Eliminationism! Nothing like rounding people up in FEMA camps!

Limeylizzie July 26, 2011 at 9:49 am

Oh America! Please grow up and stop acting like a cunt.

BaldarTFlagass July 26, 2011 at 9:49 am

"A high-ranking state Department of Transportation official rejected that claim, saying the changes were based on economics, not politics."

Whatevs. Strange coincidence in the timing, though, right?

baconzgood July 26, 2011 at 9:50 am

"FUCK YOU, YOU FUCKING FUCK"

-Frank Booth-

FNMA July 26, 2011 at 9:55 am

Frank Booth, Philosopher-King.

johnnymeatworth July 26, 2011 at 10:00 am

"YOU RECEIVE A DRIVER'S LICENSE RENEWAL NOTICE FROM ME, YOU'RE FUCKED FOREVER! YOU UNDERSTAND, FUCK?! I'LL SEND YOU STRAIGHT TO DEFENSIVE DRIVING, FUCKER!"

Mumbletypeg July 26, 2011 at 10:34 am

This PBR's for you, Baconz.

Terry July 26, 2011 at 9:51 am

Given the recall efforts going on against state representatives in Wisconsin, why aren't they recalling Walker?

freakishlywrong July 26, 2011 at 9:58 am

In due time..in January actually. (they have to serve a year). He should have all the Dems disenfranchised by then.

MissusBarry July 26, 2011 at 10:03 am

Because they're silly and obeying the law that says they can't recall him until he's been in office for a year. They have the signatures. Wonder if anybody's contemplated what the 2nd Amendment has to offer in terms of remedies.

GOPCrusher July 26, 2011 at 1:01 pm

It's getting to the point, where it will take one act, like maybe Scott Walker dragged out of his office to a waiting noose in the tree out front, for all Hell to break loose in this country.

gvvt July 26, 2011 at 10:05 am

I think they have to wait a year or something?

Terry July 26, 2011 at 10:09 am

I hope at the one year anniversary that there is a line of people waiting at the appropriate office as it opens, all with recall paperwork and signatures to file.

Biel_ze_Bubba July 26, 2011 at 11:00 am

Question is, can they get ready now, so the vote is held in January? Or do they have to wait 'till January before they can get the ball rolling.

Might have to ask the Wisconsin supreme court … oh wait, never mind.

powersuit July 26, 2011 at 10:14 am

It just gets better: Walker and the fitzgoons plan to gum up the recall effort to force the Walker recall vote to happen on the same day as the state GOP primaries. Gee, how will that turn out?

Gotta hand it to the guy for letting his blood-sucking, soul-crushing evil flag fly free, but his basic stupidity and greed are going to catch up with him soon.

freakishlywrong July 26, 2011 at 10:25 am

Are you shitting me? Can I get a mwwwaahhhaaaha and a side of Sndley Whiplash?

horsedreamer_1 July 26, 2011 at 11:23 am

The thing is, we cannot let it defeat us. So, what? The GOP will come out in greater number on their official primary day, yes, but voting is not a zero-sum game. Just because the GOP total will be higher, as raw number, doesn't mean the Democratic total will have to be lower.

We can still out-vote them.

powersuit July 26, 2011 at 11:30 am

I agree, but the difference between Ds and Rs on these things is often that Ds talk a great game about GOTV, but Rs actually do it. That's the trick here. Ds gotta get out and actually vote!

trampndirtdown July 26, 2011 at 9:51 am

Only property owners should be able to vote.

MissusBarry July 26, 2011 at 10:04 am

Only white male property owners with a net worth over $x,000,000 should be able to vote.

Fixed that for ya.

Rosie_Scenario July 26, 2011 at 10:20 am

Former "property" need not apply. That includes black folks and the ladies. Also.

baconzgood July 26, 2011 at 9:52 am

"the changes were based on economics".

Yeah because there are too many poor people voting.

EatsBabyDingos July 26, 2011 at 9:53 am

Reminds me of the Beat Farmers

My dog Spot got hit by a truck
Hubba hubba hubba hubba hubba
Scooped up his guts and put 'em in a box
Hubba hubba hubba hubba hubba

That always makes me smile. It is the anti-scottwalker in my life!

prommie July 26, 2011 at 10:17 am

I haven't heard that in so long, now I am off to youtube to seek it. And there's that other one, I will get back to you.

EatsBabyDingos July 26, 2011 at 10:33 am

That makes me a Happy Boy!

AJWjr. July 26, 2011 at 12:18 pm

RIP, Dick Montana…
And brings to mind the Aptos CA Independence Day Parade, also.

DahBoner July 26, 2011 at 2:03 pm

The Beat Farmers are cool, but they can't jam out on a service bell, like Mojo Nixon can…

johnnymeatworth July 26, 2011 at 9:53 am

Because a new 3/5 Compromise is exactly what this country needs….

Biel_ze_Bubba July 26, 2011 at 11:03 am

Anyone without a drivers license gets 3/5 of a vote? Yeah, I can see Obama "negotiating" his way to that sort of compromise. (The GOP would be asking for 1/2 a vote, so it's a win for the Dems.)

BaldarTFlagass July 26, 2011 at 9:54 am

Well, he did promise transparency in government, didn't he? This is about as transparent as it gets.

philpjfry July 26, 2011 at 9:54 am

They don't even need to pretend anymore. I weep for my country

freakishlywrong July 26, 2011 at 10:00 am

He's cross eyed, right? Or does right-wingism do that to someone? ('Shels kinda has that going on as well)

not that Dewey July 26, 2011 at 10:30 am

Fetal alcohol syndrome, I'm fairly sure. Joe Scarborough has the same look.

freakishlywrong July 26, 2011 at 11:31 am

He looks like a baseball mitt, yeah, and those beady eyes.

widestanceroman July 26, 2011 at 10:57 am

Pretty much all of the rightwing nutjobs have the same thing going on. Why? Because they are of a hive mind from hell. Faith-based life does not require actual vision.

Left_Leftie July 26, 2011 at 2:02 pm

I believe the correct term is wall-eyed.

Rotundo_ July 26, 2011 at 4:59 pm

Scooters cranium is not symmetrical, be it the strains of passing through the birth canal or some other trauma Scooter's eyes are not on the same plane , nor are his ears or much of anything else. Nasty little shit, sort of like the Doug Niedermaier of republican politics. His nose is right up the Koch's asses, but he will never be one of the chosen. I'm thinking he will be fondly forgotten the minute his sorry ass is thrown out of office. By the repubs, that is.

Naked_Bunny July 26, 2011 at 10:03 am

I assume that's "about 30 minutes away" by car.

Rosie_Scenario July 26, 2011 at 10:22 am

"Mass transit. The transportation of the poor and very poor." (or words to that effect.) Homer Simpson

horsedreamer_1 July 26, 2011 at 11:24 am

Fort Atkinson is clear across Jefferson County from Watertown. &, no, there is no mass transit in JeffCo.

jus_wonderin July 26, 2011 at 10:30 am

Clearly he is missing a second leg in his plan were public transportation is rerouted out of the areas where the DMV will be expanded hours.

Biel_ze_Bubba July 26, 2011 at 11:06 am

We need a Dem judge somewhere to order Wisconsin to provide free taxi service to the nearest DMV. It would be amusing to hear the resulting howling.

weejee July 26, 2011 at 10:12 am

Surveyor marks, mumble, grumble, where the fuck did I put those surveyor marks…

prommie July 26, 2011 at 10:16 am

Napolean's motto: L'audace, l'audace, toujours l'audace. The audacity, its breathtaking. Its overt class warfare, and nothing is off the table, its open and notorious, and this nation of lumpenproles is so class-unconscious, so brainwashed and willfully ignorant, that they refuse to see it.

GeneralLerong July 26, 2011 at 10:55 am

lumpenproles – good one. I'd forgotten about that term. Fat blobs of dough one step up from serfs [they can "vote"], amirite?

Nobody can swear like the Germans.

prommie July 26, 2011 at 11:01 am

Has a technical meaning prominent in the theories of Trotsky that is really perfectly spot-on in describing the vast majority of the US public.

DaRooster July 26, 2011 at 10:20 am

Has anyone started punching this maggot in the cock sack yet?

widestanceroman July 26, 2011 at 10:39 am

No punching–too fast. A slow vice that takes weeks to finally crush them.

DaRooster July 26, 2011 at 2:27 pm

I was thinking for weeks…

mrblifil July 26, 2011 at 10:58 am

You mean other than every kid who's ever met him from the age of 5 on?

widestanceroman July 26, 2011 at 11:43 am

Hah! At work, I once witnessed a kid (spawn of family-owned business so was untouchable) cold-cock the groin of a co-worker (who was a jerk) the very minute co-worker introduced himself to the tyke.

A scrapbook moment.

x111e7thst July 26, 2011 at 10:23 am

Wisconsin is now the Philippines under F Marcos. Perhaps with more of the whores in public office.

4TheTurnstiles July 26, 2011 at 10:30 am

And better beer, let's be honest.

BaldarTFlagass July 26, 2011 at 10:37 am

San Miguel FTW!!
The problem with that brand of Filipino beer, I found, was lack of quality control for that which was intended for domestic consumption rather than export. One night you could go out and drink a case and not even feel bad the next morning; the next night you could drink three and fall of the barstool.

horsedreamer_1 July 26, 2011 at 11:25 am

Love me some San Miguel. Got hooked on it in Spain, of all places.

(Nostalgia, maybe, on the Spaniards's part?)

GOPCrusher July 26, 2011 at 1:36 pm

And always remember to drink it with your teeth clenched, to keep the bugs from going down your throat.

MinAgain July 26, 2011 at 10:31 am

Man, Scott Walker wouldn't know subtle, if it walked up and bit him on the ass.

DaRooster July 26, 2011 at 10:33 am

That would be great… hopefully an infection of epic proportions would set in.

GOPCrusher July 26, 2011 at 1:39 pm

And I love how he hides behind the "I'm doing what the people of Wisconsin elected me to do." bullshit.
Yeah Scott, I'm sure if you would have campaigned on giving massive tax cuts to corporations, destroying the teacher's union, and then making sure that Democrats are no longer allowed to vote, I'm sure you would have won by a landslide.

Goonemeritus July 26, 2011 at 10:31 am

I’m sure the decision was based on economics, the economics of doing what ever your biggest donor wants. This guy richly deserves to be recalled and will serve as an example to independents everywhere that think Republicans can be responsible.

philpjfry July 26, 2011 at 12:34 pm

You are assuming people will learn something from this. I think you are overly optimistic

Monsieur_Grumpe July 26, 2011 at 10:40 am

Video of Walker getting shouted down at a brand new rest stop. Enjoy.
http://mystateline.com/fulltext-news?nxd_id=26521

Dürers Rhino July 26, 2011 at 10:43 am

"…the changes were based on economics, not politics." As if the two are unrelated.

Callyson July 26, 2011 at 10:54 am

From the AP:
Transportation Department executive assistant Reggie Newson denied that politics was behind the office closure plan, saying the decisions were being made based on what made the most economic sense.
"This has nothing to do with politics," he said. "We're trying to make sure that we can provide service in each county statewide efficiently."
Yeah, don't you know that providing services to poor people is terribly inefficient? They're so needy, what with their lack of funds and need for access at different times of day. If there were only bankers they could pay any fee and show up between 10:00 and 11:30 on alternate Tuesdays…

Pres.Beeblebrox July 26, 2011 at 11:13 am

Hm, unless something is screwed up with my browser, there is no longer a "thumbs down" option. I guess Downfist McAsstroll is going to have to find another line of work.

And, by the way, Walker is a {lackey/tool/running dog/insert favorite Bolshevik perjorative} of the ruling class. He and Ken Blackwell can go fuck themselves and join the Voter Suppression Club for Men.

johnnyzhivago July 26, 2011 at 12:44 pm

Welcome to multicultural, Sharia-influenced Wonkette where everyone is doing their very best to be funny and every post should be equally celebrated as an "excellent job".

weejee July 26, 2011 at 3:33 pm

While telling Spanky to shove it all the way up?

archikvetch July 26, 2011 at 11:23 am

This Walker guy really knows his chutzpah.

johnnyzhivago July 26, 2011 at 12:46 pm

Walker wouldn't know a chutzpah if he hit one in the middle of the night with his SUV and then peeled it off his front grille.

notreelyhelping July 26, 2011 at 11:33 am

I dunno. Doesn't seem entirely fair to me. But, you know…father knows best. (Sudden, overwhelming wave of nausea.)

ttommyunger July 26, 2011 at 11:37 am

Man, the Koch Brothers are really making sure they're getting their money's worth out of this wall-eyed little pussyfart, ain't they?

user-of-owls July 26, 2011 at 11:59 am

Just another day of filthyweaseling in Cheeseland.

outragedcitizen July 26, 2011 at 12:09 pm

I'm sorry but basing the decision to close the DMV offices on economics is the same thing as basing it on politics. The districts with better "economics" almost surely lean toward the GOP while the districts with lower "economics" lean more Democratic.

Just how stupid do these guys think the public is? Oh, never mind, answered my own question.

johnnyzhivago July 26, 2011 at 12:42 pm

Makes sense to me! Thanks to their golfing experience, everyone knows Republicans make better drivers.

GOPCrusher July 26, 2011 at 12:47 pm

The situation in Wisconsin is getting to the point where the Federal Government should step in. Except it doesn't exist anymore.

axmxz July 26, 2011 at 12:52 pm

Of course the changes were based on economics, of the trickle-down kind, where the rich piss on the poor.

Fox n Fiends July 26, 2011 at 1:47 pm

Lets redistrict Conservatives to Somalia.

slowhansolo July 26, 2011 at 2:23 pm

The best way to lose a war is to refuse to believe that you're in one.

glamourdammerung July 26, 2011 at 2:37 pm

Once again, conservatives show their disdain of this country.

valgal2342 July 26, 2011 at 2:40 pm

It will be so much fun watching him get recalled and lose.

Jughead2130 July 26, 2011 at 3:44 pm

The department plans to expand by four hours a week the hours of a center about 30 minutes away in Watertown.

I assume that's a 30 minute walk or 30 minute bus ride because if people could drive there they wouldn't need a fucking photo ID!

You better be ready to run your ass off after during the lunch hour of one of you jobs.
Fuckity fuck fuck fuck.

Jughead2130 July 26, 2011 at 3:52 pm

How the fuck can this be legal?

deaddddd July 26, 2011 at 5:01 pm

The Republican's aren't even trying to not seem comically evil anymore.

Jerri July 26, 2011 at 7:22 pm

Everything that can be said about this has probably already been said by now by the rest of you (and said in much more hilarious ways than I can muster), so I'll just repeat my simple refrain when it comes to this fellow: Fuck this fucking chud.

rocktonsam July 26, 2011 at 9:58 pm

if the college kids and blacks would have voted in 2010, we wouldn't have to deal with this jack ass.

come to the Dells, also

MissusBarry July 26, 2011 at 11:50 am

I know, but sometimes this “turning the other cheek” bullshit is just too much.

James Michael Curley July 26, 2011 at 1:18 pm

Drop trou', turn the other cheek and fart in their general direction.

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