What does an Asian lady fake-playing the cello have in common with the federal government? They are both drug addicts with financial problems! That is your comedy premise for this hi-larious new “parody ad” from conservative ladies’ luncheon interest the Concerned Women for America, in which a woman with money issues decides to try the same “pills” the government is taking, a painkilling medication called “Spenditol.” GET IT??!
In real life the correct metaphor is called a “credit card,” something that most Americans carry and, like the federal government, often max out because they do not have sufficient income, and then get depressed. We are laughing!
Why only mock the federal government? Let us take the premise of this video and just extend it so we can comfortably mock all the people everywhere who need to “borrow money from the Chinese” (shop at Wal-Mart?) in order to avoid the economic pain of total collapse. Oh these people and their state governments, their auto companies, their financial institutions, their Newt Gingrich, their ordinary consumers — let’s refer to them as crack whores, every one of them. We’re just a nation of drug addict prostitutes! Still laughing! Everyone everywhere is laughing except Rush Limbaugh, who has never been a drug addict or a prostitute. [YouTube]
{ 190 comments }
Is that Wendy Deng?
More like Wendi Dang, girl, you really let yourself go/went to fuck.
Oh hahaha isn't that cute hahahaaha SHUT UP
You know what also causes household budget deficits you assholes? Taking a fucking paycut while you're spending money you don't have for vacations of choice to the Middle East so you can buy fancy gas for your Hummer because some guy was mean to your dad.
(and yes, this is a metaphor for cutting taxes while fighting two wars)
THANK YOU. As idiotic as the "Government budget==household budget" comparison is, for so many reasons, at the same time, if you really wanted to run with it, you have one party saying that if one of the breadwinners takes a massive pay cut, the family will have more money, because magic. And also that we should save money by deciding to stop laundering our work clothes, and skipping days of work to save on commuting costs.
If I take a massive pay cut, then my employer has more money, and that leads to … ummm… a second job?
Yes, but it goes to somebody in the Shenzhen Special Economic Zone.
Proving once again that the right wing terrorists have a terrible sense of drama and that all actors are shameless whores.
Also, that all the cool actors are liberals.
I don't know, James Woods is pretty cool…
Victoria Jackson more than balances that away.
At least she finally got some much needed repairs for her toyota echo.
In the lady's defense, you have to do literally any job you can get to survive as an actor. This lady's finally going to have enough money to eat that second daily meal she's been hearing about.
No kidding. I was once a (well-fed) extra for a TV show episode along with a bunch of friends from the same hobby group. After the shoot, we were told there was a pizza spread a short diatance away. I told the rest of my group to walk slowly over to the food because I was certain this late night pizza deal was going to be the only meal some of the real actors were going to have. Turned out to be true.
Now…I love actors, I need them, I adore them. Especially the smart ones who make my shit look good. But… the thespians are easily led, I'm just saying…
Seeing as our Democratic politicians are, by and large, a pack of corrupt cowards who make jackals look courageous…I think the best we can hope for is that the repuke-lickin's piss everyone off so much they all disappear after the next election.
Also, I'm sure to win Lotto this weekend!
~
What does Ex – Lax have in common with the conservative crazies? They both cause the shit to flow out…
'baggers need some kind of medication for all that shameless diarrhea of the mouth…
Wait, so by mocking conservatives we are being cruel to the disabled. I guess I can live with that, in this one case.
Think those ladies have been having too much fun with ♪♫ Mother's Little Helpers ♫♪.
Ad forgot to credit the manufacturer of this wonder drug. Eight years of Bush/Repug as head of the Washington Corporation. Truth in advertising please.
Why do these people hate America?
It's not a real product??? But that ad seemed so real!
I'm at the point where I feel like Garrett Morris:
"I'm gonna get me a shotgun and kill all the whities I see,
I'm gonna get me a shotgun and kill all the whities I see.
When I kill all the whities I see, then whitey he won't bother me"
And I'M WHITE!
The GOP prefers their drug of choice, Lettherichbastardskeepitol, even though it's been proven not to treat the problem it's prescribed for, causes years of debilitating poverty, and makes the patient believe that if he drives our fiscal bus off a cliff it will sprout wings and fly.
Meh… take two Fuckitols and call me in the morning.
Lettherichbastardskeepitol was extensively tested in a number of third-world countries and was reported to be safe, highly effective and had no negative side-effects.
And where were these patriotic folk when the deficits were going into orbit under W and Cheney's watch? Cheering the fuckwits on with their titties a bouncing and waving American flags made in China grunting out "USA USA USA" with the other neandercons. Let's see your concern for the deficit when we get stupid enough to elect another republican president to bust the bank well and truly again.
cheney said- deficits don't matter. so it's ok when they do it.
They were busy producing "Swift Boat" Ads.
Where are they whenever the conservatives bring up Reagan?
Forgetting his 7 tax increases?
The would imply that conservatism and mental diseases/disorders go hand in hand. I guess that explains that whole crying jag about "liberalism being a mental illness" since we know how much that crowd loves to project.
Almost as funny as the cartoon in the Times of London depicting three starving Somalis with distended bellies saying they're had a bellyful of that hacking scandal.
I love Republican humor, English cooking and French rock 'n' roll.
…oh, and white-hot steel spikes being plunged into my eyeballs. Also.
Have you heard Serbian hip-hop?
Irish hip-hop. It does exist.
Jump Around!
not what you meant?
Such drive, such commitment. They came to get down, & they would not be deterred from that goal.
Then, magnanimously, they decided to invite others to join.
actually French rock-n-roll makes republican humor look like republican economic theory. No wait, that's actually laughable. Anyway, french rock can be pretty good.
I know you're not referring to Jacques Dutronc! Submitted without irony. Also, while not technically French, Les Lutins could hold their own with many American garage bands.
I can't imagine I would ever run into anyone in a Breitbart forum that had even heard of Jaques Dutronc. This is reason 8975 that I know I'm on the right side.
mini, mini, mini!
Les Thugs were pretty awesome. and Metal Urbain.
I’m interested in your new drug but my doctor recommends an extended course of Taxtherichfuckstilltheybleed.
SNL really sucks now.
"now"?
well, for at least 16 years. but this "commercial" is probably better than most SNL sketches because it ends in under 20 minutes.
YES. Why do they never understand that something that isn't funny after two minutes won't be funny after eight minutes?
You're missing the point. If they keep doing the same bit, week after week, it eventually becomes hilarious. Also, to be fair, everything really sucks now, and always has.
Considering that US America was put into debt by many if not most of policies that I presume these dried up vags supported like:
1) Tax cuts for the top 20% (who the fuck cuts taxes during a WAR?)
2) Bigger tax loopholes for the corprats
3) Financial deregulation
4) A pointless war in Iraq
Then I suggest they stop taking Kochspoogeproganda and take more Shutthefuckupbitch
If the entire gummint is taking it, hopefully it will have tragic/wonderful interactions with the daily dose of Tardzall ™ the entire winger contingent is addicted to.
Side effects of Tardzall include: Wide-stance, constipation, and trouble passing legislation. If an Eric Cantor lasts longer than four hours please consult a spin doctor.
Trouble passing effective legislation is actually caused by congenital cranial-rectal inversion, for which, sadly, there is no cure.
OK, this was crazy good.
ROTFLMAO!
Without pettiness, outlandish conspiracy theories, and being an ass merely for the sake of it, is there an actual conservative platform at this point?
"kill the gays and browns"
I was trying to be nice and not mention the sociopathy part.
The conservative message seems to be that the stimulus, TARP etc, didn't work, and that it's all Obama's fault, even if some parts were enacted before he assumed office. Obamacare also needs to be repealed, before anyone gets a chance to see if it works. Not forgetting no new taxes, further tax cuts for the rich, and further benefit cuts for the poors. Oh, and save the light bulbs.
"Beat Obama."
That's the platform; everything else is just tactics.
you should just be an ass. merely for the sake of it.
or for any other reason at all.
That's called Freedom.
The wingnutz should hire Ken Layne to write their scripts and get LimmyLizzie in front of the camera. They'd see a serious uptick in views, and they'd never notice that like the olde Muppet Show,
the jokes are on twothe message is on two levels.Case in point: conservatives who watch Colbert think it's real.
With LimmyLizzie, I'd bet there would be a "message on two levels."
sign me up for the lower level message, please.
Are you guys talking about Limeylizzie? LimmyLizzie is the bass player from Motorhead.
My medication of choice is Fuckemall.
Lady needs a large dose of Dildopril (TM).
She's taking twice daily doses of Stickitinn.
I hear that can be some good shit, man.
Conservative Humor? Is that like Southern Fried Health Food? Military Intelligence? Priestly Celibacy? Compassionate Conservatives? Honest Politicians? Fair and Balanced? This is what happens when some people have too much money at their disposal.
Christian Rock?
The Undefeated?
The Global Warming Hoax?
Job Creators?
Eggzackly!
Watch it! I used to be in military intelligence and we ROCKED. Never got it wrong (but then being a re-treaded grunt, I insisted on the extra effort to spare my brothers still out there in front…)
Never got it wrong. Amazing. Especially considering a I rarely get anything right. I am impressed!
I reminded my crew that people will die based on what we do. "Let's make sure it's the right people that get buried."
Too bad you are the only one with that credo.
I parked on the parkway. Thank God for that side-impact airbag, then.
So, you had that going for you, which was nice…
When will the Republicans learn that they are not funny? Yes, their policies are hilarious and their steadfast belief in trickle down economics is comical but they do not know what makes actual humans laugh.
Humor comes from two places:
1) Recognition of universal truth
2) Affection for the subject being mocked
Conservatives understand neither of these concepts. Theirs is a world of hate, willful ignorance, and hate.
Nicely put, sir or madam.
I'm sure the BrightFarters laugh uproariously at Downy McFistula's Sasha and Malia joke every time he posts it (i.e. every 12-18 hours).
This hardly fits (1) or (2) above … it must not be actual humor, as we understand it.
I wish this could be plastered everywhere on the internet. They are not capable of genuine humor because they are so inherently whetted to lies and bitterness and just general mean-spiritedness.
That whole "truth" thing trips them up every time.
All humor is based on irony. Conservatives are not funny because if they understood irony, they could not be conservatives.
Does it matter that it is technically well done and just not funny?
If by "technically well done" you mean "cameltoe costuming", well sure.
no not really.
The people that make these things are the same people that buy those old Tim Conway DVDs on late night TV.
Dorf Goes to Washington!!
Edited for I-shouldn't-wonk-by-phone.
Too bad he mysteriously disappears the night before he is scheduled to testify before a committee regarding his invention of a vaccine for Kochsuckaphilia.
Also people who cannot tire of Ruth Buzzi hitting Dean Martin with her purse.
(actually that would be me, but only when I'm drunk/high/all of them, Katie)
Hey, Tim Conway was one of the funniest guys on the planet, back in the day:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PYzuchDBvCs
Tell me you can watch that without laughing your ass off!
So clever! Let me try it:
- Bombitol
- Fuckitol
- Taxcutfortherichol
- Praywaythegayol
And I could keep going, but it still wouldn't be funny…
I would like two capsules of Fuckitol and a big glass of vodka please. (4X/day)
Thank you, Doctor Chillwaver .
Ahem, I think she may be Hispanic, not Asian, Sharron Angle!
Asian because the teenager plays the cello, hence Tiger Mom! I would bet that the characters are supposed to be Asian, and Con Women of America, not KBJ, figured "close enough". It would admittedly not be easy to make that allegation stick.
Either way, THAT'S NOT RACIAL TRANSCENDENCE!
Why would they hire an Asian actress to bitch about owing money to the Chinese? Oh wait, it could be because they're stupid.
It's funny, because I've actually heard casting agents putting out calls for "ethnically/racially ambiguous" actors. I've never quite gotten why, because in this country, we're practically wired to try and guess what they are while we're watching, and it totally distracts us from the point of the commercial. lol
Too true. Had a coworker at my part-time job (yes, I have two jobs) who I thought for the first two years working with her was Puerto Rican. Turned out, her mother is Italian-American & father is black. (Close enough?)
Also, in my defense, if I cannot tell what colour/race/ethnic background someone is, I default to Puerto Rican or Filipino (depending on how straight their hair is & narrow their eyes are). So, really, I only see two (barely) colours.
8.5 on the Vomit Meter, JoeBob.
There are 100 teabag ads just begging to be written in response to that.
Damn – should I watch it?
Not if you ever expect to get 1:03 minutes of your life back.
Too late. You tried to warn me.
Every time a winger talks about losing their "freedoms" I want to scream WHAT FREEDOM HAVE YOU LOST?!?!?!
The freedom to infringe on yours, doh!
These teabaggers have worked themselves into an anal froth about the deficit and debt, and, yet, don't they see the answer is right in front of them? Someone with a proven record of balancing the budget and even, *gasp*, a surplus. Tried and true methods. Conservative fiscal logic:
Bill Clinton '12
I'm waiting for the Koch Industries to release their generic suppository version.
I hear they're the size of medium butt plugs. Marcus B uses the brand name version and says they're fabulous.
Lawsuit from ad's unpaid contractors in 3 .. 2 .. 1 ..
So that's what happened to Joyce DeWitt.
um, instead of the period at the end, you want,
's grand-daughter.
Dear wimmins,
Whare iz our jerbs? Frothy sed there shood be 153 million jerbs in 'Merica. R U HIDING THE JERBS in UR CHELLOS?
ok that was pretty damn awesome.
RAISE FUCKING TAXES. Stop taking Corporatol.
In the republican mind Obama's stimulas failed and Bush's stimulas never happened. Am I right?
The republican what??
Rice is nice.
But what about the Trillions in dark debt held by the banks, Miss Smarty Pants Asian lady?
Fascists, be they second world war vintage or the modern wealthy kind, just cannot do funny. It is as alien a concept to them as empathy and kindness, and they just don't have it in them from an experiential standpoint. They should stick to fear and violent rhetoric, since it really *is* more in their comfort zones.
She's right though. If you ignore those 15 straight months of job growth, we've had absolutely no job growth.
You're not talking about the 8 years of no net job growth under Dubya, are you? Because that never happened on Planet Teabag.
Not to mention that the starting point was 800,000 net job loss per month prior to the stimulus…
hey lady! Did you know 1 in 7 americans is on food stamps, half of those are children and 8% elderly? Your congress is going to severely cut that (obv).
but I guess that's just sharing the pain…
I'd like to see the follow up where the rich banker guy comes around and repossesses her house and cello.
Not to worry — she's the wife of a rich banker guy. (Asian fetish is popular among the richies these days – right, Rupert?)
The cello is a $25,000 birthday present, which he can afford thanks to the low tax rate on his dividend income (creating a job for … umm… the guy who built it in 1840.) Your average American schlub would only waste the money on food, or clothes, or his mortgage payments; this is much more like what the Founding Fathers, and Jesus, had in mind.
Also she's current on her house payments, but the foreclosure went through a rocket-docket and the papers on her porch were robo-signed.
"Hilarious!" — Rush Limbaugh
"A riot ever second!" — Sean Hannity
"Funnier than a happy face pizza pie." — Herman Cain
"Rolling on the floor with laughter" — Michele Bachmann
"What?" — Sarah Palin
In Sarah's defense, it loses something if you only watch the first half.
Which YouTube videos do you watch, Sarah?
AOTK.
0% — Rotten Tomatoes
"Concerned Women for America"…sounds like the types West would classify as "Ladies." An embarassment to the gender and fucking 'Merka.
Probably created and run by unpleasant old white men, using Koch's and Murdoch's money.
It's the infamous Tim LaHaye's wife's organization. She is best known for writing the first Christian sex manual.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Act_of_Marriage
Didn't watch, not interested. OT, but they say loss of melanin in old people causes a loss of humor, also.
This is final proof: Conservatives lack the "Funny" gene. Which is odd since they seem to have an ample supply of the "Gay" gene.
I feel smug for choosing addictions to good things, like sex. And chocolate.
Fuckers got a lot o gall.
"Mom, does your government ever feel…not so fresh?"
You mean down there? Inside the beltway?
I think the lady is Asian. How do I know? She plays a stringed instrument. Bet she's a bad driver, too.
I've wondered what Marie Antoinette would do with a YouTube account.
Let them watch cake.
Just go to Paris Hilton's account to find out.
I'll just make an obvious observation here: absolutely the ONLY time conservatives are funny is when they are not trying to be. I think this rule applies across the board to everyone from Louis Napoleon to W.
Metternich was the last funny one, from what I hear.
Conservatives need a dose of Realityll® and Dubyadone® (now in intrathecal form–Dubyadone-IT®).
you know whats really funny, not this
"stop spending it all"
too late! lolololololol
I'm sure Concerned Women for America think the only people who should be spending their husbands' money is them.
Am I right, fellas? This guy knows what I'm talking about!
Sinbad, you so funny!
Where do they think this is spot on funny? Arkansas? Alabama? States that have elected the Tea Party House of Representative Congressional Representatives? Let those states form their own Conservative little country. Let New York realign with Boston, Toronto, and Send-a-Socialist/Independent to Congress Vermont. On the West Coast, let San Francisco find its own mini-companions and just give up on the idea of 52 states.
I used to stress out about my budget, worry about getting a job that paid enough to meet my basic needs and maybe invest in my future, until I heard about a new drug being used by Republican governments everywhere…
Cutitall!
This new drug makes life easier. Revenues down because of the recession caused by the recklessness of your buddies in Washington? Cutitall! Need for social services up because of the people on Main Street who are suffering as a result of Wall Street greed? Cutitall!
Cutitall…the easy way to avoid making hard choices about America's future!
From the makers of Fuckitall™.
For topical use only. On your wrists.
The republicans all suffer from chronic bloody foamy diarrhea. Soon they will all be flushed into a giant sewer
I hate that I know this, but Robin Williams already did this bit with a "drug" called Fuckitol.
Damitol!
Yes, but Robin Williams is funny. He just is.
Well, maybe for the first 10 minutes of his act, then you get tired just watching him. I mean, the guy doesn't have any kind of off switch. It's like he's speeding out of his mind the entire time.
Cocaine is God's way of telling you that you have too much money.
Aristocrats and rakes.
Republicans with foamy diarrhea need to ask their doctor if Implodium could be right for them.
Spenditol?
Damn!
Woman.
What are you thinking?
You got a nice body.
You could pay them bills doing a little hooki'n on the side.
Best thing, and I'm sure you know, and Repub's love, it's non taxable.
This ad showed up at the beginning of 50 Cent's "In Da Club" when I was posting it on a friend's FB page. (Cause it's her birthday. And we're we're gonna party like it's her birthday.)
Perhaps Fitty should pay the Scared Hags of Amurika a visit.
I dunno about Spentitol, but the previous President spent a trillion dollars to "stimulate" the Iraqi economy. The only jobs he created over there were in the IED manufacturing sector. And he passed that cost on to our children — mostly our 18 year old children.
Spenditol: Side effects may include;
Governorea
Kochtopia
Voterdepression
Praygazia
… if you experience insanity for more than one year, please recall your Gov.
Watching it on mute made it slightly bearable. I was disturbed by the typo at the end though: Tell them to STOP spending
itat all. There – fixed it for them.Seriously, best crossover white-as-asian role since Mickey Rooney as I.Y. Yunioshi!!
Can't wait for the sequel "Cutitol," which should have a most salutary effect on the teen self-mutilation demographic!
I take Fuckitol. It usually makes my problems go away, well, at least temporarily.
Concerned Women of America, eh? We sure this isn't The Simpsons? Where is Helen Lovejoy when you need her?
LOL
When strippers attempt to "go legit" late in life, it's not often pretty.
What? Victoria Jackson wasn't available?
Glad they explained what they meant, I never would have gotten that!
This came on my TV this morning. Conservatives just don't get humor unless it's mean-spirited and unfunny.
The correct metaphor would be some one sitting at their kitchen table, looking over a credit card statement that says they're maxed out. The person mulls this over and decides that the best way to approach the debt is to cut back on the amount of money coming in each month, so the person demands a lower salary from their boss.
Yeah, like they give a shit about kids and the future.
They're just laughing at the thought that their Repugnicant husbands would actually let them have anything to do with spending the family's money (pregnant and barefoot in the kitchen, always!)
Maybe she wouldn't be in such debt if she hadn't gotten so much work done to her face! Seriously, she's about a face lift away from no facial movement whatsoever! But I guess to republicans a smooth, unfeeling face is exactly the kind of image they want to present…
Once again cheesedick conservative bullshit that probably used union actors and film crew without a wiff of irony.
I do dig her camel toe, however.
Poor people stay poor people –
And they never get to see
Someone's got to win in the human race-
If it isn't you, then it has to be me.
Reaganomovitamin, repackaged for the new millennium.
…I would kinda hope Rush has never been a prostitute – it would sully such a reputable profession.
Concerned Women for America is a US coalition of conservative women which promotes Biblical values and family traditions, and one of their core values is "pornography" which they have taken great pains to somehow link to the Bible. Not sure where "Spenditol" comes in but a great read nonetheless < http://www.cwfa.org/coreissues.asp>
I prescribe a boot to the head for the makers of this ad.
OK, so you might not agree with the ad but have you considered that this actress is just doing it as another gig? And I know that Americans are geographically challenged but how on earth could you think, even for a nanosecond, that she's Asian?
If you were in the biz and looked at it from the point of view of "craft" you'd see that she does a great job. I thought you guys had freedom of speech…
Spittin' out lyrics, homie I'm wit'cha
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