race card valid thru 2012

Everyone Who Calls Allen West Sexist Is Just a Racist

you be quiet back there!Hohboy these liberals, their racism knows no bounds: Allen West is furious, just furious (his only waking state), that he is not allowed to send even one demented misogynistic screed to a House female without everyone on the Left double-dildo victimizing him with racial discrimination. Is that possibly a hypocritical thing to claim if you are a sexist? “The thing that really most aggravates me is that there is this double standard,” Wasserman said of West’s accusation that she is “not a Lady,” because ladies should not criticize a man’s views. JUST KIDDING. SHE DID NOT SAY THAT, Allen West did. “The thing that really most aggravates me is that there is this double standard,” West said of liberals, who never even bother to attack white people for saying dumb things.

“People on the hard left can continue to attack conservatives and especially minority conservatives,” he added, to prove his point that it is unfair for people from the opposition to be able to attack anyone who is a minority. Haha, has anyone else in the GOP gotten this memo re: Obama?

And finally more of this nonsense, from TPM:

“I grew up in the inner city, strong values, came from a strong military family and background,” West continues. “What we do is we totally invalidate the liberal social welfare policies and programs. And you know, I’m the threat because I’m the guy that got off their 21st-century plantation, and they cannot afford to have a strong voice such as mine out there, reverberating and resonating across this country.”

Allen West is one of those urban blacks who got off that 21st-century plantation honey train whatever that is, you know, the one that’s been so sweet to blacks all this time, and so he can say whatever the hell he wants to about the Ladies, he’s earned that much, case closed. [TPM]

What Others Are Reading

Comments

Hey there, Wonkeputians! Shypixel here with a few helpful links to ease your transition to Disqus - Claiming Old Accounts - Claiming Your ID Comments - Turning off Disqus Notifications. And, as always, remember our Commenting Rules For Radicals, Enjoy!

  • nounverb911

    What? Allen West is black?

    • Tommmcatt

      Yes, but also secretly Batman!

      • Terry

        Glad I'm not the only one who keeps misreading his name as Adam West.

        • SorosBot

          I keep thinking of him as a combination of Barry Allen and Wally West, the second and third Flashes.

          • http://grandpaboy.blogspot.com/ seppdecker

            He's more Barry Allen than Grandmaster Flash, espcially if we're talking about a Geoff Johns-written "gritty" style Barry Allen who threatens to vibrate his hand through a prisoner bad guy's skull at super-speed.

          • Naked_Bunny

            Glad I'm not the only one who does that.

            "Allen West: The fastest man alive!" — Angela West

          • Lionel[redacted]Esq

            Geek Win of the Day!!!

        • mumbly_joe

          There's an easy way to tell them apart. One of them is a complete ham who pretends to be a tough-guy vigilante for a campy, so-bad-it's-awful theatrical performance, and the other one voice acts as himself on Family Guy.

        • Negropolis

          Since I'm a young'un, I keep reading it Kanye West. 'Specially since all us black people look alike, and all.

      • Gleem_McShineys

        I'm epicbutthurtMan!

    • http://thethingsrepublicanshate.com/ Chillwaver

      He's the Black White Supremacist from the Dave Chappelle Show.

      • Dashboard_Jesus

        best Chappelle bit ever!

    • PristineODummy

      The things people will do for attention, these days.

  • Barb

    I forget, what rap group is he with?

    • SexySmurf

      He's Kanye's less talented, more self-centered brother.

      • http://assistantatlas.blogspot.com/ assistantatlas

        I'm pretty sure it's unpossible to be more self-centered that Kanye without tearing a hole in the space-time continuum.

        • Texan_Bulldog

          Allen West doesn't care about black people.

          • Dashboard_Jesus

            fucking WIN!

        • LetUsBray

          I'm happy you got to make your comment, assistantatlas, and I'm gonna let you finish. But Marcus Tullius Cicero was one of the most self-centered people of all time. Of All Time!

    • http://www.frso.org/index.htm 4TheTurnstiles

      either Kid or Play. Hard to tell them apart now that his hair's at half staff, in honor of The Troops of 9/11 or whatever.

    • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4r7wHMg5Yjg ProgressiveInga

      AWA
      (Assholes with Attitude)
      Don't you remember their hit "Straight Outta Court Martial"?

    • LettucePrey

      Insane Clown Posse. Minus the posse.

      • Dudleydidwrong

        Insane Clown Posse Pussy. Fixed.

      • Dashboard_Jesus

        thanks, made me spew wine out my nose, AGAIN!

    • elviouslyqueer

      The Beastly Boyz.

    • themcwow

      2 Live Crew

    • SorosBot

      Well it was the Fresh Prince who did Wild Wild West, although I don't think Allen has a giant robot spider.

      • Barb

        That movie is the worst movie ever!

        • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4r7wHMg5Yjg ProgressiveInga

          Until "Undefeated" hit the screens, amiright?

          • chicken_thief

            Todd, is that you?!

          • SorosBot

            I'll see what the critics think…

            Rotten Tomatoes has Wild Wild West at 21% Fresh, while now that there have been several more reviews of Undefeated added since Monday's Wonkwire post it's moved up to – no wait it's still a perfect 0%.

          • Barb

            The Smurf movie comes out next Friday. I expect that will crush Undefeated. Why not, everything else has.

    • GOPCrusher

      Wasn't he Ice-T from Ice-T and T-Cup?

  • nounverb911

    "Wasserman said of West’s accusation that she is “not a Lady” because she criticizes his policies."
    Wasserman is certainly better equipped than West is.

    • http://www.storycorner.us/ JustPixelz

      It pains me to point out that West's "not a lady" rhetoric is meant to evoke DWS's double mastectomy. To remind people (or her) that she lost part of her femininity. He's a cad who should apologize for such language to such a woman.

      • GOPCrusher

        If that's the truth then he deserves to win Keith's Worst Person In The World forever. And then shot in the scrotum with a nail gun.

  • metamarcisf

    What's wrong with being sexy?

    • SexySmurf

      Apparently it's not as bad as being racy.

    • FNMA

      "We say, 'Love your brother.' We don't say it really, but…"

    • jodyleek

      I see your Spinal Tap reference and raise you a: You should have seen the cover they wanted to do. It wasn't a glove, I assure you.

      • metamarcisf

        BTW, Reagan always said that his favorite Tap album was "Shark Sandwich"

        • FNMA

          Shit Sandwich.

        • jodyleek

          He must have enjoyed the album's everyman earthiness and primal barnyard lust. I know I do.

  • Respitetini

    So, rather than owning up to his own mistake, he reaches into his bag o' crazy and invents a thing? That's just so unexpected from a Republican.

  • http://hong-kong-actresses.blogspot.com/ donner_froh

    Allen West is not a lady. But he is a jerk.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Sorry Allen — we're judging you not by the color of your skin, but by the quality of your character. (Someone, somewhere, once told us we should do that — let us know if you disagree.)

  • toomtabard

    “People on the hard left can continue to attack conservatives and especially minority conservatives,” he added.

    Got it! Thanks for permission, Allen!

    • SorosBot

      Because conservatives never attack people on the left.

      • elviouslyqueer
      • mumbly_joe

        West has said, in as many words, that he wants to destroy the left. But that's not the same, for some reason.

        • LetUsBray

          He means he wants to destroy the left WITH VOTES.

        • An_Outhouse

          He means he wants to destroy the left WITH SURVEYOR SYMBOLS.

    • GOPCrusher

      He should really fact check himself. Pretty much everyone that is outside the 20% that identifies themselves as "conservatives", attack conservatives.

      • chicken_thief

        They don't seem to mind eating their own, either. Who rained on Mittens announcement that he was running for Prez – hard leftties or Mama Grifter and the co-owner of Tiffany's?! Who tossed out that One L has massive debilitating migraines?! It's fun to watch.

    • mumbly_joe

      That's right. We attack him because he's a minority, and not because he's a textbook fascist and also a torture-lover.

      Wait up… this is what conservatives call "playing the race card", innit?

      • NorthStarSpanx

        What's with "hard" Left? What if we're soft Left? Or semi-hard Left? Or premature Left?

        Sicko.

        • Fare la Volpe

          Democrats are the flaccid left.

          • comrad_darkness

            Ain't that the truth.

          • Dashboard_Jesus

            hell it made me hard just to think of smashing him in his Uncle Tom house negro mouth! (and I'm a PROGRESSIVE dammit!)

        • Biel_ze_Bubba

          He's probably a whole lot more friendly with the tumescent left.

    • zhubajie

      There's a hard left in the USA?

      • glamourdammerung

        According to the teabaggers, Nixon and Reagan would be this "hard left" in the U.S.

  • BaldarTFlagass

    "What we do is we totally invalidate the liberal social welfare policies and programs."

    So, every poor person would be just fine if he/she joined the military? Got it.

    • OneYieldRegular

      The military *is* a social welfare program.

      • anniegetyerfun

        Yes, but one that allows you to kill Arabs, which makes it OK.

    • anniegetyerfun

      Operation Human Shield. Surely you've heard of it.

    • jodyleek

      Or better yet, forced to join. I think Bob Marley wrote a song about it.

      • BerkeleyBear

        Forced by economics. The American way. (As pointed out by the great Bear Naked Ladies' song "Barrel of Fun").

    • chicken_thief

      Yes, because clearly if one person could do it, then fuck it, everybody should be able to do it. Which roughly equates to "Michael Jordan is still the best basketball player to ever play the game simply because everyone since him is just too goddamned lazy to excel the way he did."

      • SorosBot

        The ghost of Wilt Chamberlain would like a word with you.

  • SexySmurf

    Put it back in the deck, Allen.

  • Come here a minute

    I'm sorry for my double standard — I shouldn't expect a black conservative to have any more sensitivity to discrimination than a white male conservative, even if he rants about his inner-city childhood. They're all stupid.

    • horsedreamer_1

      Allen West & Tim Pawlenty grew up on the same mean streets of South St. Paul.

  • http://www.wonkette.com ChurchofRealism

    Quick, somebody call Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson so they can rally to Allen West's defense. Wait…what?

  • Callyson

    Bitch set him up…

  • http://wonkette.com/ Monsieur_Grumpe

    Damnit! I thought I wasn't a racist. Mom is going to be so pissed.

    • NorthStarSpanx

      Son, always be a good boy, don't ever play with guns.

  • http://ifthethunderdontgetya.blogspot.com/ ifthethunderdontgetya

    It's really hard being a black conservative.

    Just ask Supreme Court Justice Clarence Coke™ Can.
    ~

    • LettucePrey

      Or J.C. Watts, the black GOP's lawn jockey from 1997 to 1999. 'Memba him?

      • horsedreamer_1

        Not since he lost to Brad Henry for Oklahoma Gov. in '04.

    • GOPCrusher

      Michael Steele can testify!

    • http://www.storycorner.us/ JustPixelz

      But on the other hand, if you're black and a Repubican, you get to be on teevee a lot.

      • LetUsBray

        There are about 14 black Republicans in the entire country. And every single one of them has his own talk show, syndicated column, or seat in congress or on the supreme court. But Republicans are totally against affirmative action.

    • Swampgas_Man

      Don't forget our own "Uncle" Thomas Sowell!

  • http://www.burndownblog.com evan7257

    Some race and gender studies student just got her thesis topic.

    • Fare la Volpe

      Way ahead of ya. I'm including it in my literature review of Uncle Tom's Cabin.

  • nounverb911

    What a putz!

    • chicken_thief

      He does have some chootz pa, doesn't he?

  • bumfug

    Oh, Allen. We don't give you shit because you're black, we give you shit because of that stupid haircut. Also, because you're a fool.

    • widestanceroman

      Agreed, the haircut is stupid, but it's his smug-shaped mouth that irks me. Same with Cantor, it just oozes arrogance and self-satisfaction.

      • BaldarTFlagass

        The Air Force Agency I work for is rife with retired lieutenant colonels. It's just the way they are.

        • http://www.storycorner.us/ JustPixelz

          Indecisive SOBs. Are the lieutenants or are they colonels? Choose, damn it.

          • BaldarTFlagass

            Indeed. Thankfully most lieutenant generals (and major generals) get jobs with the big national contracting firms so we don't have to deal with them here.

          • gullywompr

            Is it just me, or are colonels the only ones who think they out-rank a civilian? They are the only rank that has ever tried to make me feel like an inferior.

            Except this one Lieutenant, but he was a DBA, so being a jerk was part of the job description.

          • bumfug

            The really dumb ones are the guys who think they really have more power than an NCO. There was this one asshole, a bird colonel, post IG, on the list for a star, thought he was king of the world. Took me two minutes to get him thrown out of the army – "conduct unbecoming an officer", "perjury", "filing a false customs declaration", "mailing prohibited items", etc. Fuck 'em, don't be an asshole. Coulda been worse, back during Vietnam guys would just throw a grenade in on them.

  • http://hong-kong-actresses.blogspot.com/ donner_froh

    "I grew up in the inner city, strong values, came from a strong military family and background"

    The armed forces of this country are the best example of a federal program that benefited African Americans and Latinos.

    Fuck you Allen West.

    • pdiddycornchips

      That was then. Now, the only way to lift minorities out of poverty and off the "21st century plantations" is to destroy the social safety net and give tax cuts to billionaires. This may seem like snark but it's actually the preferred policy of most conservatives.

    • http://www.wonkette.com Pres[EXTERMINATE!!]

      Yeah, it cracks me the fuck up how some people are pro-Military and yet assail "social welfare programs." The military provides just about everything to the armed forces and their families, from housing to clothing to free healthcare to cut-rate shopping to "morale, welfare, and recreation" programs. It's as socialist as you can get, yet somehow it's not OK to be socialist.

      • BaldarTFlagass

        Actually, it's not so much socialist as authoritarian. Been there, done that, got the tattoo.

        • Swampgas_Man

          You think socialists can't be authoritarians?

      • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

        It's pay, for the extreme hazard of risking your life for your country, so you can't really call it socialist. Also, the gravy train ends when the military no longer employs your sorry, amputated ass, so non-socialist, also. But yeah, it gives the appearance of giving a shit about people's welfare.

        • GOPCrusher

          Well, I don't know about where you live, but in Iowa being a Veteran entitles you to stand in a special unemployment line.
          USA! USA! USA!

          • SorosBot

            And you actually get health care! And um… no that's about it.

          • BaldarTFlagass

            Added bonus, you get to be both Patriot AND Hero.

    • http://www.storycorner.us/ JustPixelz

      "I grew up in the inner city, strong values, came from a strong military family and background"

      What a disappointment! All those advantages and he throws it away by becoming an asshole. Allen, you could have made something good out of yourself.

  • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4r7wHMg5Yjg ProgressiveInga

    He's really worked on his tan since his Batman TV show days.

    • hollywooddood

      That's it! I knew he looked familiar.

    • GOPCrusher

      He had a lot of free time.

  • arcane_allusion

    I loved him on the Wire. I can't believe they killed off his character.

    • http://www.wonkette.com Pres[EXTERMINATE!!]

      Omar or Stringer Bell?

      Actually, he has more of a Brother Mouzone vibe to him. "Mister Cheese… I see."

      • ingloriousbytch

        This guy is totally Clay Davis.

        "Sheeeeeeeit."

        • riverside68

          I will soooooo drink to that, or anything else you got also.

          • Sue4466

            too.

  • Sue4466

    His office released a statement–and I am not making this up–that what he said is not sexist because he does not hate women and he has two daughters.

    So, there you have it. Proof he is not sexist because some of his best friends are women. Or he fucks women and makes girl babies. Or something like that.

    • horsedreamer_1

      Alan Keyes says you don't even have to love your daughters to prove you don't hate all women.

      • PristineODummy

        Especially if they're half-breed lesbo bitches. But that's not the HATE talking now.

    • Pragmatist2

      obviously his little swimmers lack that Y chromosome thingy. Not much of a man, I would say.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      He loves women.

      Same way he loves beer, and his car.

    • mumbly_joe

      Because the misogynist thing would be to leave any girl-babies on the mountainside, to be devoured by wolves. He let his female offspring live, and therefore he is not a sexist. Duh.

      (honestly, given the boner he -like most fascists- has for Sparta, and the way Spartans treated women, this is probably not as far from the truth as we'd like to think.)

      • BerkeleyBear

        Likes Spartans, huh? So he keeps a gay battle buddy on the side at all times?

      • Sue4466

        I fear you are correct on your parenthetical speculation.

    • Nixon_So_Fine

      –and I am not making this up–
      "I shit you not" would be a better choice.
      Pls remember to check your style manuals prior to posting, ppl! Kthnx bai!

      • Sue4466

        I was trying to be a Lady and therefore avoid Mr. West's email wrath.

  • SarahsBush

    Michael Steele to Herman Cain to Allen West. I think the Republicans might need to buy some more tokens soon.

    • horsedreamer_1

      Looks like Eric Cantor's going to be too busy playing Skee-ball this weekend to be able to work on that debty, ceily thing with NOBAMA.

    • http://www.wonkette.com Pres[EXTERMINATE!!]

      Yeah, I think Alan Keyes is past his sell-by date by now.

      • PristineODummy

        Geez dood he's even past his "use by" date.

    • http://whatthefuckhasgopdonesofar.com/ Reagan Still Dead

      Conservatives do get the worst bottom-feeding white politicians, so it only makes sense they'd get the worst African-American (that is so gonna piss of Miss West) ones too.

    • GOPCrusher

      See Harold Ford Jr.

    • GregComlish

      Michael Steele is still the least embarrassing conservative black American. Probably followed by Juan Williams, Herman Cain, Allen West, Clarence Thomas, and then Allen Keyes. Am I missing anybody?

      • PristineODummy

        Harold Ford gets to be in there SOMEwhere, dood.

  • http://www.frso.org/index.htm 4TheTurnstiles

    MY PUSSY HURTS

    –Allen "Macho Man" West

    • Tommmcatt

      Stop double-dildo victimizing him! He needs time to rest and heal!

      • http://wonkette.com/ starfanglednut

        Dildo libel!

    • genxr

      Ahem, I think you mean "My BLACK pussy hurts" you racist lefty.

      • http://www.frso.org/index.htm 4TheTurnstiles

        I assumed Allen West's pussy identified as white. Specifically, a puffy white twink with cotton candy stuck to his chin and a bag full of Arab snuff porn.

  • OkieDokieDog

    Black – I don't care.
    Sexist crazy-assed numbnut RWNJ teabaggie fuckwad – I don't like.

  • Callyson

    Also:
    So the miltiary totally invalidates liberal social welfare programs? Not as long as people who are enlisted get paid so poorly that they have to get food stamps… http://www.military.com/news/article/more-troops-

    • genxr

      That's what payday loans are for! Duh.

  • http://wonkette.com/ weejee

    Well the Army joined me via the draft rather than I joined it, but that aside the Army made me what I am today. A college edjuhmuhkated engineer with a strong libtarded social welfare core.

    ♪♫ And de pinkos go rolling along ♫♪

    • V572 Hair of Destiny

      All hail conscripts!

  • prommie

    This guy is no misogynist. I know misogynists. I live in a state governed by a misogynist. This guy is nothing; Sandwiches Christie has the strongest pimp-hand of them all.

    • http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=351473119155 Fred_Wertham_Jr

      Force=Mass x Acceleration. He has a natural advantage.

      • http://wonkette.com/ starfanglednut

        And a lot of momentum, also too.

      • PristineODummy

        I like how you did that.

      • Negropolis

        Inertia Christie FTW.

    • http://whatthefuckhasgopdonesofar.com/ Reagan Still Dead

      Hey, some of my best friends are misogynists!

      • Geminisunmars

        I've got a great relationship with the misogynists!

    • SilverFox

      Christie/West '12: Shoutiness We Can Believe In.

  • BaldarTFlagass

    “I grew up in the inner city, strong values, came from a strong military family and background,”

    Yeah, there's a lot of military bases located in inner cities across America.
    Actually, most military bases are located in Bumfuck, so the "strong values" he seems to exhibit are those you might expect from someone raised in Redneckistan.

    • V572 Hair of Destiny

      Department of Defense Dependent Schools were built on military installations in the South so that children of black service members (after integration of the military in 1947) wouldn't pollute the lily-while schools of Alabama, Texas, Georgia, etc.

      Now of course they've become a self-sustaining boondoggle like every other program that's outlived its usefulness. Then, as now with DADT, the military adapts, however grudgingly, to whatever wack policies the politicians saddle them with. Too bad this jerk doesn't know his own history.

      • BaldarTFlagass

        Right around the time of enforced school desegregation, my dad was stationed at Keesler AFB, in that bastion of liberality, Biloxi Mississippi. Since the city had to bus white kids to the poor black schools, they decided that the path of least resistance was to bus all the white dependents from base housing to those selfsame poor black schools. Ninth grade was quite an eye-opening experience for me—not the racial part; my 8 previous years in DoD schools precluded that, but the poverty part.

      • anniegetyerfun

        Well, it's time to start opening military recruitment centers in the gay parts of my big cities, says I.

    • http://Wonkette.com ProudLibunatic

      This so crazy, because my parents taught in DOD Overseas schools (Japan, Germany, Turkey, Denmark, England), for over 30 years. I went to those schools for Elem., Jr. High (we called it that, back in the day, kids) and High School.
      When we got together 25 years later, all we could talk about was how ahead of our time we were on racial matters, and what a shock the US was.
      Race was not an issue for us, and didn't factor into romances, student government, or the all-important school dances. (Parents, however, felt differently.)
      We lived in a (no doubt, naive) bubble.
      This seems to have been a common scenario in overseas schools.
      Go figure.

  • Texan_Bulldog

    He and Vanilla Ice need to exchange skin tones.

  • http://www.frso.org/index.htm 4TheTurnstiles

    How long before he goes for the Jew-gular, ala Jesse Jackson?

    "Don't let me down… Hymietown"

    • emmelemm

      Nice!

      Also, he's from Florida. So if he does go nut-so on the Jews, it should be easier to do a campaign against him a la the Sarah Silverman "go to Florida and help your Jewish grandparents to vote" thing. (That was a thing, right?)

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      ♫♪ Well, I
      Talk about it, Talk about it, Talk about it, Talk about it,
      Talk about, Talk about, Talk about movin.

      Gotta move on, Gotta move on, Gotta move on.

      Won't you take me to
      Hymietown. ♫♪

  • http://whatisawatthedevolution.blogspot.com imissopus

    West added, "All these liberals need to unbunch their panties and get over it."

  • freakishlywrong

    "The hard left"..what the fuck does that even mean? Used in a sentence; I'd like to punch a hard left at this misogynistic dildo's crotch. OK, now I get it.

    • ArmoredLibunatic

      I don't know, I think he's implying that I have a backbone or something.

    • anniegetyerfun

      Didn't Clinton's list a little to the left when hard?

      • freakishlywrong

        Contrary to the rumors, I'm NOT Monica Lewinsky.

        • anniegetyerfun

          Please, like she'd be smart enough to survive here for a day.

          ETA: Oops, I hate women.

    • Nothingisamiss

      Where I think you're going wrong here is trying to create sense out of actual words spoken/written/tweeted by an angry retard.

    • LetUsBray

      As a registered Democratic voter, I believe that makes me a member of the flaccid left.

    • ThundercatHo

      I thought it was a NASCAR reference.

  • widestanceroman

    Thanks to this man's courage, I am now terrified that my African American partner of a dozen years will find out about my true racist nature.

  • ThundercatHo

    Wait, I'm confused. Is the 21st century plantation in the inner city? What do they grow there? Did they blacks harvest this crop (asphalt?) before all their jobs were stolen by illegal immigrants? What does this have to do with Allen West being a mysogynistic asshat?

    • riverside68

      You do not want to get into a discussion of plantations on this blog.

      Just warning you, there was a 32 comment discussion yesterday on that word.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        But they're great, if you cut 'em up and pan-fry them.

  • DashboardBuddha
  • FirstUntieMe

    Allen West is a House Nigger.

  • Crank_Tango

    I dunno, I kinda think I could go racist for Allen West.

  • Radiotherapy®

    I heard this shit last night on the Mark Levin comedy hour last night. The best part was at the end when he wanted all the listeners to go to West's website and donate to his campaign.
    Funny comments from a guy who resides " in Plantation, FL.

    • metamarcisf

      What's also funny is that there is a sort of right-wing backlash against West. It began with his indeciperable vote "for" the Pigford Settlement and has mushroomed into a conspiracy theory about him all of a sudden being everywhere on the right-wing web, ostensibly to boost his fund-raising.

      • comrad_darkness

        You can't get to overexposed without going through "black" first?

  • qwerty42

    hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

  • horsedreamer_1

    I think Allen's signals got crossed & he mixed up Will Smith's character from '99 with Will Smith as Muhammad Ali.

  • qwerty42

    "People on the hard left can … blah, blah blah"
    What exactly is the "hard left" in the USA? The Wobblies? Not sure West even understands that kind of stuff.

    • Doktor Zoom

      My married lover (R-ID) was on a hard leftist just a little while ago, but now she's gone home.

    • http://wonkette.com/ Sharkey

      You go out 66, get off at the parkway, and take the second exit. About a half mile up the road, watch out for the hard left.

      • James Michael Curley

        Then " take a right at the light, keep goin' straight until night, and then boy, you're on your own"

        • comrad_darkness

          I think we should put some mountains here. Otherwise, what are all the characters going to fall off of?

  • SayItWithWookies

    Wasserman-Schultz calmly wonders how West can vote to cut aid to his elderly and poor constituents, and West's response is to explode in a vile tirade of personal and mysogynistic attacks totally unbefitting an elected representative, then blame Wasserman-Schultz for releasing said attack to the public, then hiding behind his race. Really, it's only a matter of time before someone opens his freezer and finds it full of random body parts wrapped in cellophane.

    • Radiotherapy®

      What do you want from a guy who should have been court-martialled and slinked out of a war crime?

  • OneYieldRegular

    "I'd rather be black than female." – Shirley Chisholm

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      That's what he said.

  • fuflans

    so i see we've moved from bachmann week to west wingnut week.

    • Nothingisamiss

      It's fun because there are so many to choose from.

  • http://hong-kong-actresses.blogspot.com/ donner_froh

    Dear Allen West:

    If you torture prisoners you are a disgusting human being. You tortured prisoners.

    See? Race isn't a part of the equation at all.

    Signed,

    Your Biggest Fan

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Just don't criticize him for doing it — that's racist.

  • Doktor Zoom

    Allen West, you are NOT a lady.

    • GOPCrusher

      I read that in Maury Povich's voice.

  • ttommyunger

    "Am I gonna have to slap a bitch to get some respect? AM I ? Now look what you gone and done made me do.

    • LettucePrey

      "Bitches ain't shit but ho's and tricks." ~ Mohandas Gandhi

      • ttommyunger

        This assclown has as much business in Congress as I do. What the fuck are those people in FL smoking?

        • Dashboard_Jesus

          Rick Scott's butthole? oh wait, I thought you said 'sniffing'

          • ttommyunger

            Unbelievable! I'm old, but I'm not crazy. Rick has killed more people than I have fer Chrissakes.

  • ArmoredLibunatic

    Oh, go mock-execute a puppy, you spaz.

    • BlueMonkeh

      ++++++++++++++

  • LettucePrey

    Hey, "Plantation Honey Train" is the name of my alt-country/lite-emo/post-punk band!

    Look for us in Bakersfield, when we open for Lady Antebellum.

    • horsedreamer_1

      Hit me with your Bloodshot. Fire away!

  • franco_pinyon

    This is like watching Stan Laurel & Oliver Hardy put up wallpaper. The more he tries, the more entagled he gets.

    Also, it's funny.

  • BlueMonkeh

    Seems a mite bit excited over the hard left, no?

  • LouBristol

    What about those who call him a cunt?

    • freakishlywrong

      Worse than racists and sexists. Leftists!

    • Limeylizzie

      I'm going with cuntish, dopey wog.

      • Barb

        Lizzie, did you get the role you auditioned for?

        • Limeylizzie

          Don't know yet, but the character was based on Christopher Hitchens but apparently they were”open” to a woman, which means if they find a man who is British and vaguely intellectual he will get it!

          • Negropolis

            LoL! It's funny (and sad) 'cause it's true. :(

          • Limeylizzie

            Happens all the time, they are “open” to a minority or a woman, but the white man always gets the role!

  • V572 Hair of Destiny

    Where's your "plantation Republican" now, hard left?

  • http://thefastertimes.com/absurdnews/ inapewetrust

    yes, yes, we are all deeply threatened by allen west.

  • http://www.wonkette.com TanzbodenKoenig

    Hey West, why is it it you left the army again? Oh yea, you were to violent and unstable even for them, but I guess that makes you perfect for the Tea Party.

  • PuckStopsHere

    Allen West doesn't care about black people…

  • Goonemeritus

    So he has gone from a public school to the military and then to congress. Why does Representative West hate private industry so much?

    • freakishlywrong

      Amazing, right? He has yet to be fapped by the invisible hand.

  • PuckStopsHere

    But at least Marcus Bachmann is still a lady, right?

  • Poindexter718

    In the black vernacular, is "reverberating and resonating" anything like "Flaking and perpatrating"?
    Thx!

  • elviouslyqueer

    Nigga Bitch, please.

  • zappadoo76

    Do Debbie and Allen get their hair done at the same light socket?

    • chicken_thief

      Hey! I like the Debbie jewish princess curls look. I'd do her.

    • Negropolis

      Debbie Allen!

  • HelmutNewton

    Boy, those Plantation Republicans have some choot-spa!

    • Nothingisamiss

      reallly, a win for the meme mix. ++

  • occams8ball

    What the hell is a "BINO" anyway?

  • James Michael Curley

    I've met a lot of military, exmilitary and veterans with the same attitude as West. Think its the salt peter they put in the mashed potatos in basic.

  • mavenmaven

    I guess its to be expected, he wasn't too good with the ladies when he was younger, either: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FnXEPXdB3-w

  • SorosBot

    West claims the left hates him because he "got of their 21st Century plantation," even though he actually got on the 21st Century plantation, alongside Alan Keyes and Uncle Clarence Thomas.

    • BaldarTFlagass

      One man's plantation is another man's free-market invisible-handed paradise.

  • CrunchyKnee

    Repulicans can never "man up" to their own faults, it's always the other person or group's fault. Victims 4 life I tells ya.

    • Crank_Tango

      I think that was an NWA album… Efil4smitciV

    • BlueStateLibel

      Republicans are more like trigger-happy paranoid schizophrenics.

  • http://grandpaboy.blogspot.com/ seppdecker

    "double-dildo victimizing"

    You just subjected me to a double nostril, reverse iced-tea enema.

    • Crank_Tango

      sounds like a tea party to me!

  • El Pinche

    I went from being a slave on a plantation to being servant at the HonkeyBaggerville Country Club. Someday you will have a nice place like this with hard work.

  • anniegetyerfun

    Haha, has anyone else in the GOP gotten this memo re: Obama?

    Yes, they received it. And they used it to wipe up their own dribbling Santorum.

  • AbsolutNathan

    Don't worry–you're not "THE BLACK" raging misogynist; we recognize you're just a raging misogynist who "HAPPENS TO BE" black.

  • phlox✔

    He should also write a strong-worded letter to his Congressman Lady.

  • Redhead

    "they cannot afford to have a strong voice such as mine out there, reverberating and resonating across this country."

    Meth does make you tend to talk loudly.

  • Barrelhse

    Don't tell me West is to going to announce, too. All the bugs are coming out of the woodwork for the GOP, and not one of them is qualified to lead this country.

  • greypanter

    Nothing resonates like the man whose ego dildo has found the resonance frequency of his inflated self image bone. My computer monitor practically vibrates itself off of the desk in the sway of his image.

    • Nothingisamiss

      +++++ and plus and win.

  • ingloriousbytch

    I get so sick of having to explain this. Allan, we don't attack you for being a black conservative. We attack you for being a douche and not the Massengill type available in a convenient 4-pack. You sir, are the kind of douche that my grandmother used to keep hanging in the shower: the rubbery kind that smelled of vinegar and we had to pretend we didn't see.

    cc: Herman Cain

  • BlueStateLibel

    Stop it with the stupid "hard left." You'll know hard left when they come lining people up against a wall and nationalizing everything from Exxon to the 7-11. Just because we don't want to raid SSI for billionaire's tax cuts isn't hard left, idiot.

  • fartknocker

    See, we in Texas don't have the complete collection of stupid, racists, homophobic, sexist, execution-loving whack jobs. Florida now takes the lead.

    Put your big boy pants on Arizona or Indiana – it's your turn.

    And fellow Texans don't be disenchanted. Big Chief Rick Pretty Hair will be having his Prayerapooloza in Houston in 2 weeks. We'll soon be number 1 in crazy people.

    PS: Al Franken is awesome.

  • http://hong-kong-actresses.blogspot.com/ donner_froh

    West is pretty new at the "being crazy while a member of the House of Representatives" game. Bachmann is the undisputed leader, both Steve King of Iowa, Peter King of Lon Guy Land are formidable competitors and there are plenty of others.

    But he is off to a great start–a hair trigger temper combined with not understanding social norms should take him a long way.

  • James Michael Curley

    Before Amtrack I once took the 21st Century Plantation to Chicago. Moon light over the lake, great veal in the dining car.

  • http://wonkette.com/ starfanglednut

    Anyone who calls a black conservative man on sexism is a racist.
    Anyone who calls a white conservative woman on racism is a sexist.

    Got it. Reality according to tea party.

    • SorosBot

      All criticism of black conservatives is racist, and all criticism of conservative women is sexist. It's simple; the right tends to pretend that sexism and racism don't exist, that unless some shouts out "I hate black people / women" anytime someone calls out racism or sexism it's just whining or "pulling the race card"; therefore it's just a reaction to criticism of a woman or racial minority, not statements that actually are racist or sexist.

      Note that it's different with hatred of gay people and non-Christians; most of the right openly admit that they think those forms of bigotry are perfectly OK (well except when it comes to antisemitism; they pretend to condemn it unlike hatred of Muslims or atheists but really think it's fine).

      • http://wonkette.com/ starfanglednut

        Anyone who calls out a gay conservative on…. ah…. is um… er…Oh fuck it.

  • Naked_Bunny

    I grew up in the inner city

    "Now that I no longer need government assistance, I want to take it away from everyone else."

    strong values

    "People who benefit from government programs don't have values."

    military family and background

    "Er…except for that one."

  • http://hong-kong-actresses.blogspot.com/ donner_froh

    Hard left for teabaggers = raise taxes on the wealthiest 10 percent of the population.

    Hard left in reality = smash the state and build communism.

  • Blendergoathead

    If by "racist" West means "hates fuckwits," I'm guilty as hell and proud of it.

  • GOPCrusher

    I wonder if any of these morans ever stop to consider that no one takes the time to criticize people who don't say stupid shit.

  • Weenus299

    Today, we are all racists.

  • MarcusBarbarian

    Hard left? Sounds like somebody needs to be disciplined.

  • orygoon

    A "strong military backgroud" and an "grew up in an inner city" sound contradictory (says this military brat). And lo, what does the wikipedia say? It says that "His father and older brother were both career military officers:"

    There aren't many ghetto bases. I can't think of any, actually. What a POS liar.

    • ShaveTheWhales

      Thank you. I wondered about that.

  • ellislacroix

    From Wikipedia:
    West and his wife "currently reside in Plantation, Florida"

  • Fox n Fiends

    we call that lame excuse the HIGH TOP FADE

  • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

    Next, he'll be claiming that muslims are plotting to fly a plane into his fade.

  • whiterabid

    "I’m the threat because I’m the guy that got off their 21st-century plantation, and they cannot afford to have a strong voice such as mine out there, reverberating and resonating across this country.”

    I'm sorry, I don't speak jive. No, wait. That was 20th century, and this is…

    Never mind.

  • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

    Is this what they call "meeting cute" in the rom-coms?

  • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

    This reminds me of when McCain started acting a goddamned fool early in Obama's Senatorship, writing a nasty personal letter to complain about some Barry-double-cross that existed in his doddering brain only.

  • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

    Keith Ellison, evil muslin congressman and frequent attempted whipping boy of Cain and West, tells it like it is:
    http://www.salon.com/news/politics/war_room/2011/

    • GOPCrusher

      I'd have to agree with Rep. Ellison, I think Cain and other Republiklans do repeat their anti-Muslim screeds on purpose. And to keep their name in the news. And I would take it a step further, and say they do it in hopes of provoking a negative reaction from the American Muslim community.

  • thefrontpage

    Allan West is a racist and a sexist.

    He should resign from Congress, effective immediately.

  • timbo71351

    This issue isn't your skin color or politics. It's that you are a crazy asshole from some gerrymandered to fuck district who hangs out with motorcycle gangs.

  • flamingpdog

    Allan West gets a AAA rating in my book – African American Asshole.

  • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

    Here's a nice summary of Allen West mental instability:
    http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/meet-allen-

    Quite clearly the mentality of a "leader" who would be killing his political enemies in a less-developed country.

    Or maybe I have the black conservatives all wrong! Maybe the entire movement is a giant put-on, like the Zulu Krewe at Mardi Gras, satirizing pompous white bigots!

    • mumbly_joe

      I have to say, seeing the Zulu parade was one of my favorite things about Mardi Gras when I went down there, a few years ago. It's right up there with all the titties.

      • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

        Titties in N'awlins? I thought you had to go all the way to Rio Carnival for that action!

  • ragnarok4msm

    THe bitch was being a bitch And Allen called her on it.Don't hear the outrage at the OVERLY MORE PERSONAL INSULTS against PAlin or BAchmann. AND NO I DONT CARE FOR THOSE TWITS EITHER

    • glamourdammerung

      Cry more.

    • comrad_darkness

      She referred to him by name, where exactly?

      Brother thinks everything is about him. That doesn't tell us anything at all about him, does it?

      • ragnarok4msm

        THE GENTLEMAN FROM SOUTH FLORIDA(her words) who just left the room.HINT: his name was WEST. Let me dumb it down for you, WWE style, MIZ: REALLY? REALLY?

        • glamourdammerung

          Care to point out the personal insults she made?

  • __kth__

    Shorter Allen West: the 95% of blacks who vote Democratic are every bit as dumb, shiftless, and immoral as the KKK says they are.

  • comrad_darkness

    > came from a strong military family and background

    Yeah. You were government employees sucking down government benefits. This totally invalidates, er, something.

  • comrad_darkness

    It's tough out there for a sexist brother who only has a race card to play.

  • raygotaway

    How's that war crimes thing going, Allen?

  • comrad_darkness

    For a guy who claims he would willingly carry "gasoline into hell" he sure has awfully thin and delicate skin.

  • PristineODummy

    Sweet sufferin' Christ! Why is Teh Stoopid Man doubling down on Teh Stoopid?*

    (*Not a trick question.)

  • Negropolis

    He got off the 21st Century Plantation and then quite actually moved to a place named Plantation. Fuck you, you clueless creep.

    This guy is a sociopath, and I mean that seriously. You don't have to have a degree to see that. This guy is even more of an ego than Kanye West, and something than a bit more strange than Adam West.

    Honestly, don't ever trust a grown-ass black man in this day and age with a flattop.

  • An_Outhouse

    With my new purple pill prescription, I am pleased to be a proud member of the hard left.

    • L188188

      You know, I think you have your pill marketing programs mixed up. That purple pill is just Nexium for your heartburn. Your dick is still going to be soft unless you get some BLUE pills.

  • spinozasgod

    I am trying to figure out how he was raised in the inner city and came from a military family……what military base is in the inner city? Don't military families live in base housing? Is this the "vanillia Ice" version of being from the inner city?

  • http://howtosavetheworld.ca/ BZ1

    Doesn't disgraced Col Allen live in a district called "plantation"? No irony here???