RACE CARD VALID THRU 2012  1:42 pm July 21, 2011

Everyone Who Calls Allen West Sexist Is Just a Racist

by Kirsten Boyd Johnson

you be quiet back there!Hohboy these liberals, their racism knows no bounds: Allen West is furious, just furious (his only waking state), that he is not allowed to send even one demented misogynistic screed to a House female without everyone on the Left double-dildo victimizing him with racial discrimination. Is that possibly a hypocritical thing to claim if you are a sexist? “The thing that really most aggravates me is that there is this double standard,” Wasserman said of West’s accusation that she is “not a Lady,” because ladies should not criticize a man’s views. JUST KIDDING. SHE DID NOT SAY THAT, Allen West did. “The thing that really most aggravates me is that there is this double standard,” West said of liberals, who never even bother to attack white people for saying dumb things.

“People on the hard left can continue to attack conservatives and especially minority conservatives,” he added, to prove his point that it is unfair for people from the opposition to be able to attack anyone who is a minority. Haha, has anyone else in the GOP gotten this memo re: Obama?

And finally more of this nonsense, from TPM:

“I grew up in the inner city, strong values, came from a strong military family and background,” West continues. “What we do is we totally invalidate the liberal social welfare policies and programs. And you know, I’m the threat because I’m the guy that got off their 21st-century plantation, and they cannot afford to have a strong voice such as mine out there, reverberating and resonating across this country.”

Allen West is one of those urban blacks who got off that 21st-century plantation honey train whatever that is, you know, the one that’s been so sweet to blacks all this time, and so he can say whatever the hell he wants to about the Ladies, he’s earned that much, case closed. [TPM]

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 290 comments }

nounverb911 July 21, 2011 at 1:44 pm

What? Allen West is black?

Tommmcatt July 21, 2011 at 1:53 pm

Yes, but also secretly Batman!

Terry July 21, 2011 at 2:03 pm

Glad I'm not the only one who keeps misreading his name as Adam West.

SorosBot July 21, 2011 at 2:13 pm

I keep thinking of him as a combination of Barry Allen and Wally West, the second and third Flashes.

seppdecker July 21, 2011 at 2:33 pm

He's more Barry Allen than Grandmaster Flash, espcially if we're talking about a Geoff Johns-written "gritty" style Barry Allen who threatens to vibrate his hand through a prisoner bad guy's skull at super-speed.

Naked_Bunny July 21, 2011 at 3:11 pm

Glad I'm not the only one who does that.

"Allen West: The fastest man alive!" — Angela West

Lionel[redacted]Esq July 22, 2011 at 1:57 am

Geek Win of the Day!!!

mumbly_joe July 21, 2011 at 3:16 pm

There's an easy way to tell them apart. One of them is a complete ham who pretends to be a tough-guy vigilante for a campy, so-bad-it's-awful theatrical performance, and the other one voice acts as himself on Family Guy.

Negropolis July 22, 2011 at 12:01 am

Since I'm a young'un, I keep reading it Kanye West. 'Specially since all us black people look alike, and all.

Gleem_McShineys July 21, 2011 at 3:20 pm

I'm epicbutthurtMan!

Chillwaver July 21, 2011 at 2:43 pm

He's the Black White Supremacist from the Dave Chappelle Show.

Dashboard_Jesus July 22, 2011 at 12:50 am

best Chappelle bit ever!

PristineODummy July 21, 2011 at 7:59 pm

The things people will do for attention, these days.

Barb July 21, 2011 at 1:45 pm

I forget, what rap group is he with?

SexySmurf July 21, 2011 at 1:48 pm

He's Kanye's less talented, more self-centered brother.

assistantatlas July 21, 2011 at 1:53 pm

I'm pretty sure it's unpossible to be more self-centered that Kanye without tearing a hole in the space-time continuum.

Texan_Bulldog July 21, 2011 at 1:58 pm

Allen West doesn't care about black people.

Dashboard_Jesus July 22, 2011 at 12:50 am

fucking WIN!

LetUsBray July 21, 2011 at 4:16 pm

I'm happy you got to make your comment, assistantatlas, and I'm gonna let you finish. But Marcus Tullius Cicero was one of the most self-centered people of all time. Of All Time!

4TheTurnstiles July 21, 2011 at 1:53 pm

either Kid or Play. Hard to tell them apart now that his hair's at half staff, in honor of The Troops of 9/11 or whatever.

ProgressiveInga July 21, 2011 at 1:53 pm

AWA
(Assholes with Attitude)
Don't you remember their hit "Straight Outta Court Martial"?

LettucePrey July 21, 2011 at 2:09 pm

Insane Clown Posse. Minus the posse.

Dudleydidwrong July 21, 2011 at 3:41 pm

Insane Clown Posse Pussy. Fixed.

Dashboard_Jesus July 22, 2011 at 12:51 am

thanks, made me spew wine out my nose, AGAIN!

elviouslyqueer July 21, 2011 at 2:16 pm

The Beastly Boyz.

themcwow July 21, 2011 at 2:28 pm

2 Live Crew

SorosBot July 21, 2011 at 2:41 pm

Well it was the Fresh Prince who did Wild Wild West, although I don't think Allen has a giant robot spider.

Barb July 21, 2011 at 2:43 pm

That movie is the worst movie ever!

ProgressiveInga July 21, 2011 at 2:46 pm

Until "Undefeated" hit the screens, amiright?

chicken_thief July 21, 2011 at 2:52 pm

Todd, is that you?!

SorosBot July 21, 2011 at 2:56 pm

I'll see what the critics think…

Rotten Tomatoes has Wild Wild West at 21% Fresh, while now that there have been several more reviews of Undefeated added since Monday's Wonkwire post it's moved up to – no wait it's still a perfect 0%.

GOPCrusher July 21, 2011 at 2:51 pm

Wasn't he Ice-T from Ice-T and T-Cup?

nounverb911 July 21, 2011 at 1:45 pm

"Wasserman said of West’s accusation that she is “not a Lady” because she criticizes his policies."
Wasserman is certainly better equipped than West is.

JustPixelz July 21, 2011 at 2:59 pm

It pains me to point out that West's "not a lady" rhetoric is meant to evoke DWS's double mastectomy. To remind people (or her) that she lost part of her femininity. He's a cad who should apologize for such language to such a woman.

GOPCrusher July 21, 2011 at 3:45 pm

If that's the truth then he deserves to win Keith's Worst Person In The World forever. And then shot in the scrotum with a nail gun.

metamarcisf July 21, 2011 at 1:45 pm

What's wrong with being sexy?

SexySmurf July 21, 2011 at 1:53 pm

Apparently it's not as bad as being racy.

FNMA July 21, 2011 at 1:57 pm

"We say, 'Love your brother.' We don't say it really, but…"

jodyleek July 21, 2011 at 2:42 pm

I see your Spinal Tap reference and raise you a: You should have seen the cover they wanted to do. It wasn't a glove, I assure you.

metamarcisf July 21, 2011 at 2:51 pm

BTW, Reagan always said that his favorite Tap album was "Shark Sandwich"

FNMA July 21, 2011 at 3:00 pm

Shit Sandwich.

jodyleek July 21, 2011 at 3:08 pm

He must have enjoyed the album's everyman earthiness and primal barnyard lust. I know I do.

Respitetini July 21, 2011 at 1:46 pm

So, rather than owning up to his own mistake, he reaches into his bag o' crazy and invents a thing? That's just so unexpected from a Republican.

donner_froh July 21, 2011 at 1:47 pm

Allen West is not a lady. But he is a jerk.

Biel_ze_Bubba July 22, 2011 at 3:06 am

Sorry Allen — we're judging you not by the color of your skin, but by the quality of your character. (Someone, somewhere, once told us we should do that — let us know if you disagree.)

toomtabard July 21, 2011 at 1:47 pm

“People on the hard left can continue to attack conservatives and especially minority conservatives,” he added.

Got it! Thanks for permission, Allen!

SorosBot July 21, 2011 at 2:15 pm

Because conservatives never attack people on the left.

elviouslyqueer July 21, 2011 at 2:20 pm
mumbly_joe July 21, 2011 at 3:02 pm

West has said, in as many words, that he wants to destroy the left. But that's not the same, for some reason.

LetUsBray July 21, 2011 at 4:18 pm

He means he wants to destroy the left WITH VOTES.

An_Outhouse July 22, 2011 at 9:38 am

He means he wants to destroy the left WITH SURVEYOR SYMBOLS.

GOPCrusher July 21, 2011 at 2:54 pm

He should really fact check himself. Pretty much everyone that is outside the 20% that identifies themselves as "conservatives", attack conservatives.

chicken_thief July 21, 2011 at 2:58 pm

They don't seem to mind eating their own, either. Who rained on Mittens announcement that he was running for Prez – hard leftties or Mama Grifter and the co-owner of Tiffany's?! Who tossed out that One L has massive debilitating migraines?! It's fun to watch.

mumbly_joe July 21, 2011 at 3:01 pm

That's right. We attack him because he's a minority, and not because he's a textbook fascist and also a torture-lover.

Wait up… this is what conservatives call "playing the race card", innit?

NorthStarSpanx July 21, 2011 at 3:12 pm

What's with "hard" Left? What if we're soft Left? Or semi-hard Left? Or premature Left?

Sicko.

Fare la Volpe July 21, 2011 at 5:11 pm

Democrats are the flaccid left.

comrad_darkness July 21, 2011 at 7:28 pm

Ain't that the truth.

Dashboard_Jesus July 22, 2011 at 12:59 am

hell it made me hard just to think of smashing him in his Uncle Tom house negro mouth! (and I'm a PROGRESSIVE dammit!)

Biel_ze_Bubba July 22, 2011 at 3:03 am

He's probably a whole lot more friendly with the tumescent left.

zhubajie July 21, 2011 at 7:16 pm

There's a hard left in the USA?

glamourdammerung July 22, 2011 at 1:58 am

According to the teabaggers, Nixon and Reagan would be this "hard left" in the U.S.

BaldarTFlagass July 21, 2011 at 1:47 pm

"What we do is we totally invalidate the liberal social welfare policies and programs."

So, every poor person would be just fine if he/she joined the military? Got it.

OneYieldRegular July 21, 2011 at 1:56 pm

The military *is* a social welfare program.

anniegetyerfun July 21, 2011 at 2:31 pm

Yes, but one that allows you to kill Arabs, which makes it OK.

anniegetyerfun July 21, 2011 at 2:31 pm

Operation Human Shield. Surely you've heard of it.

jodyleek July 21, 2011 at 2:45 pm

Or better yet, forced to join. I think Bob Marley wrote a song about it.

BerkeleyBear July 21, 2011 at 3:29 pm

Forced by economics. The American way. (As pointed out by the great Bear Naked Ladies' song "Barrel of Fun").

chicken_thief July 21, 2011 at 3:03 pm

Yes, because clearly if one person could do it, then fuck it, everybody should be able to do it. Which roughly equates to "Michael Jordan is still the best basketball player to ever play the game simply because everyone since him is just too goddamned lazy to excel the way he did."

SorosBot July 21, 2011 at 4:56 pm

The ghost of Wilt Chamberlain would like a word with you.

SexySmurf July 21, 2011 at 1:47 pm

Put it back in the deck, Allen.

Come here a minute July 21, 2011 at 1:48 pm

I'm sorry for my double standard — I shouldn't expect a black conservative to have any more sensitivity to discrimination than a white male conservative, even if he rants about his inner-city childhood. They're all stupid.

horsedreamer_1 July 21, 2011 at 1:54 pm

Allen West & Tim Pawlenty grew up on the same mean streets of South St. Paul.

ChurchofRealism July 21, 2011 at 1:48 pm

Quick, somebody call Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson so they can rally to Allen West's defense. Wait…what?

Callyson July 21, 2011 at 1:48 pm

Bitch set him up…

Monsieur_Grumpe July 21, 2011 at 1:48 pm

Damnit! I thought I wasn't a racist. Mom is going to be so pissed.

NorthStarSpanx July 21, 2011 at 3:13 pm

Son, always be a good boy, don't ever play with guns.

ifthethunderdontgetya July 21, 2011 at 1:49 pm

It's really hard being a black conservative.

Just ask Supreme Court Justice Clarence Coke™ Can.
~

LettucePrey July 21, 2011 at 2:10 pm

Or J.C. Watts, the black GOP's lawn jockey from 1997 to 1999. 'Memba him?

horsedreamer_1 July 21, 2011 at 3:00 pm

Not since he lost to Brad Henry for Oklahoma Gov. in '04.

GOPCrusher July 21, 2011 at 2:56 pm

Michael Steele can testify!

JustPixelz July 21, 2011 at 3:01 pm

But on the other hand, if you're black and a Repubican, you get to be on teevee a lot.

LetUsBray July 21, 2011 at 4:22 pm

There are about 14 black Republicans in the entire country. And every single one of them has his own talk show, syndicated column, or seat in congress or on the supreme court. But Republicans are totally against affirmative action.

Swampgas_Man July 21, 2011 at 6:47 pm

Don't forget our own "Uncle" Thomas Sowell!

evan7257 July 21, 2011 at 1:49 pm

Some race and gender studies student just got her thesis topic.

Fare la Volpe July 21, 2011 at 5:10 pm

Way ahead of ya. I'm including it in my literature review of Uncle Tom's Cabin.

nounverb911 July 21, 2011 at 1:49 pm

What a putz!

chicken_thief July 21, 2011 at 3:05 pm

He does have some chootz pa, doesn't he?

bumfug July 21, 2011 at 1:49 pm

Oh, Allen. We don't give you shit because you're black, we give you shit because of that stupid haircut. Also, because you're a fool.

widestanceroman July 21, 2011 at 2:07 pm

Agreed, the haircut is stupid, but it's his smug-shaped mouth that irks me. Same with Cantor, it just oozes arrogance and self-satisfaction.

BaldarTFlagass July 21, 2011 at 2:10 pm

The Air Force Agency I work for is rife with retired lieutenant colonels. It's just the way they are.

JustPixelz July 21, 2011 at 3:03 pm

Indecisive SOBs. Are the lieutenants or are they colonels? Choose, damn it.

BaldarTFlagass July 21, 2011 at 3:50 pm

Indeed. Thankfully most lieutenant generals (and major generals) get jobs with the big national contracting firms so we don't have to deal with them here.

donner_froh July 21, 2011 at 1:49 pm

"I grew up in the inner city, strong values, came from a strong military family and background"

The armed forces of this country are the best example of a federal program that benefited African Americans and Latinos.

Fuck you Allen West.

pdiddycornchips July 21, 2011 at 2:01 pm

That was then. Now, the only way to lift minorities out of poverty and off the "21st century plantations" is to destroy the social safety net and give tax cuts to billionaires. This may seem like snark but it's actually the preferred policy of most conservatives.

Pres[EXTERMINATE!!] July 21, 2011 at 2:04 pm

Yeah, it cracks me the fuck up how some people are pro-Military and yet assail "social welfare programs." The military provides just about everything to the armed forces and their families, from housing to clothing to free healthcare to cut-rate shopping to "morale, welfare, and recreation" programs. It's as socialist as you can get, yet somehow it's not OK to be socialist.

BaldarTFlagass July 21, 2011 at 2:34 pm

Actually, it's not so much socialist as authoritarian. Been there, done that, got the tattoo.

Swampgas_Man July 21, 2011 at 6:48 pm

You think socialists can't be authoritarians?

Chet Kincaid July 21, 2011 at 2:49 pm

It's pay, for the extreme hazard of risking your life for your country, so you can't really call it socialist. Also, the gravy train ends when the military no longer employs your sorry, amputated ass, so non-socialist, also. But yeah, it gives the appearance of giving a shit about people's welfare.

GOPCrusher July 21, 2011 at 3:00 pm

Well, I don't know about where you live, but in Iowa being a Veteran entitles you to stand in a special unemployment line.
USA! USA! USA!

SorosBot July 21, 2011 at 3:11 pm

And you actually get health care! And um… no that's about it.

BaldarTFlagass July 21, 2011 at 3:27 pm

Added bonus, you get to be both Patriot AND Hero.

JustPixelz July 21, 2011 at 3:07 pm

"I grew up in the inner city, strong values, came from a strong military family and background"

What a disappointment! All those advantages and he throws it away by becoming an asshole. Allen, you could have made something good out of yourself.

ProgressiveInga July 21, 2011 at 1:49 pm

He's really worked on his tan since his Batman TV show days.

hollywooddood July 21, 2011 at 3:59 pm

That's it! I knew he looked familiar.

GOPCrusher July 21, 2011 at 4:33 pm

He had a lot of free time.

arcane_allusion July 21, 2011 at 1:49 pm

I loved him on the Wire. I can't believe they killed off his character.

Pres[EXTERMINATE!!] July 21, 2011 at 2:05 pm

Omar or Stringer Bell?

Actually, he has more of a Brother Mouzone vibe to him. "Mister Cheese… I see."

ingloriousbytch July 21, 2011 at 2:48 pm

This guy is totally Clay Davis.

"Sheeeeeeeit."

riverside68 July 21, 2011 at 2:53 pm

I will soooooo drink to that, or anything else you got also.

Sue4466 July 21, 2011 at 4:43 pm

too.

Sue4466 July 21, 2011 at 1:49 pm

His office released a statement–and I am not making this up–that what he said is not sexist because he does not hate women and he has two daughters.

So, there you have it. Proof he is not sexist because some of his best friends are women. Or he fucks women and makes girl babies. Or something like that.

horsedreamer_1 July 21, 2011 at 1:56 pm

Alan Keyes says you don't even have to love your daughters to prove you don't hate all women.

PristineODummy July 21, 2011 at 8:20 pm

Especially if they're half-breed lesbo bitches. But that's not the HATE talking now.

Pragmatist2 July 21, 2011 at 2:16 pm

obviously his little swimmers lack that Y chromosome thingy. Not much of a man, I would say.

Biel_ze_Bubba July 21, 2011 at 2:54 pm

He loves women.

Same way he loves beer, and his car.

mumbly_joe July 21, 2011 at 2:57 pm

Because the misogynist thing would be to leave any girl-babies on the mountainside, to be devoured by wolves. He let his female offspring live, and therefore he is not a sexist. Duh.

(honestly, given the boner he -like most fascists- has for Sparta, and the way Spartans treated women, this is probably not as far from the truth as we'd like to think.)

BerkeleyBear July 21, 2011 at 3:32 pm

Likes Spartans, huh? So he keeps a gay battle buddy on the side at all times?

Sue4466 July 21, 2011 at 4:42 pm

I fear you are correct on your parenthetical speculation.

Nixon_So_Fine July 21, 2011 at 4:21 pm

–and I am not making this up–
"I shit you not" would be a better choice.
Pls remember to check your style manuals prior to posting, ppl! Kthnx bai!

Sue4466 July 21, 2011 at 4:42 pm

I was trying to be a Lady and therefore avoid Mr. West's email wrath.

SarahsBush July 21, 2011 at 1:50 pm

Michael Steele to Herman Cain to Allen West. I think the Republicans might need to buy some more tokens soon.

horsedreamer_1 July 21, 2011 at 1:57 pm

Looks like Eric Cantor's going to be too busy playing Skee-ball this weekend to be able to work on that debty, ceily thing with NOBAMA.

Pres[EXTERMINATE!!] July 21, 2011 at 2:06 pm

Yeah, I think Alan Keyes is past his sell-by date by now.

PristineODummy July 21, 2011 at 8:22 pm

Geez dood he's even past his "use by" date.

Reagan Still Dead July 21, 2011 at 2:29 pm

Conservatives do get the worst bottom-feeding white politicians, so it only makes sense they'd get the worst African-American (that is so gonna piss of Miss West) ones too.

GOPCrusher July 21, 2011 at 3:01 pm

See Harold Ford Jr.

GregComlish July 21, 2011 at 4:23 pm

Michael Steele is still the least embarrassing conservative black American. Probably followed by Juan Williams, Herman Cain, Allen West, Clarence Thomas, and then Allen Keyes. Am I missing anybody?

PristineODummy July 21, 2011 at 8:23 pm

Harold Ford gets to be in there SOMEwhere, dood.

4TheTurnstiles July 21, 2011 at 1:51 pm

MY PUSSY HURTS

–Allen "Macho Man" West

Tommmcatt July 21, 2011 at 1:56 pm

Stop double-dildo victimizing him! He needs time to rest and heal!

starfanglednut July 21, 2011 at 2:45 pm

Dildo libel!

genxr July 21, 2011 at 2:07 pm

Ahem, I think you mean "My BLACK pussy hurts" you racist lefty.

4TheTurnstiles July 21, 2011 at 2:29 pm

I assumed Allen West's pussy identified as white. Specifically, a puffy white twink with cotton candy stuck to his chin and a bag full of Arab snuff porn.

OkieDokieDog July 21, 2011 at 1:52 pm

Black – I don't care.
Sexist crazy-assed numbnut RWNJ teabaggie fuckwad – I don't like.

Callyson July 21, 2011 at 1:52 pm

Also:
So the miltiary totally invalidates liberal social welfare programs? Not as long as people who are enlisted get paid so poorly that they have to get food stamps… http://www.military.com/news/article/more-troops-

genxr July 21, 2011 at 2:07 pm

That's what payday loans are for! Duh.

weejee July 21, 2011 at 1:53 pm

Well the Army joined me via the draft rather than I joined it, but that aside the Army made me what I am today. A college edjuhmuhkated engineer with a strong libtarded social welfare core.

♪♫ And de pinkos go rolling along ♫♪

V572 Hair of Destiny July 21, 2011 at 2:01 pm

All hail conscripts!

prommie July 21, 2011 at 1:53 pm

This guy is no misogynist. I know misogynists. I live in a state governed by a misogynist. This guy is nothing; Sandwiches Christie has the strongest pimp-hand of them all.

Fred_Wertham_Jr July 21, 2011 at 2:24 pm

Force=Mass x Acceleration. He has a natural advantage.

starfanglednut July 21, 2011 at 2:47 pm

And a lot of momentum, also too.

PristineODummy July 21, 2011 at 8:24 pm

I like how you did that.

Negropolis July 22, 2011 at 12:13 am

Inertia Christie FTW.

Reagan Still Dead July 21, 2011 at 2:30 pm

Hey, some of my best friends are misogynists!

Geminisunmars July 21, 2011 at 3:04 pm

I've got a great relationship with the misogynists!

SilverFox July 21, 2011 at 2:57 pm

Christie/West '12: Shoutiness We Can Believe In.

BaldarTFlagass July 21, 2011 at 1:53 pm

“I grew up in the inner city, strong values, came from a strong military family and background,”

Yeah, there's a lot of military bases located in inner cities across America.
Actually, most military bases are located in Bumfuck, so the "strong values" he seems to exhibit are those you might expect from someone raised in Redneckistan.

V572 Hair of Destiny July 21, 2011 at 2:05 pm

Department of Defense Dependent Schools were built on military installations in the South so that children of black service members (after integration of the military in 1947) wouldn't pollute the lily-while schools of Alabama, Texas, Georgia, etc.

Now of course they've become a self-sustaining boondoggle like every other program that's outlived its usefulness. Then, as now with DADT, the military adapts, however grudgingly, to whatever wack policies the politicians saddle them with. Too bad this jerk doesn't know his own history.

BaldarTFlagass July 21, 2011 at 2:17 pm

Right around the time of enforced school desegregation, my dad was stationed at Keesler AFB, in that bastion of liberality, Biloxi Mississippi. Since the city had to bus white kids to the poor black schools, they decided that the path of least resistance was to bus all the white dependents from base housing to those selfsame poor black schools. Ninth grade was quite an eye-opening experience for me—not the racial part; my 8 previous years in DoD schools precluded that, but the poverty part.

anniegetyerfun July 21, 2011 at 2:34 pm

Well, it's time to start opening military recruitment centers in the gay parts of my big cities, says I.

ProudLibunatic July 21, 2011 at 9:06 pm

This so crazy, because my parents taught in DOD Overseas schools (Japan, Germany, Turkey, Denmark, England), for over 30 years. I went to those schools for Elem., Jr. High (we called it that, back in the day, kids) and High School.
When we got together 25 years later, all we could talk about was how ahead of our time we were on racial matters, and what a shock the US was.
Race was not an issue for us, and didn't factor into romances, student government, or the all-important school dances. (Parents, however, felt differently.)
We lived in a (no doubt, naive) bubble.
This seems to have been a common scenario in overseas schools.
Go figure.

Texan_Bulldog July 21, 2011 at 1:54 pm

He and Vanilla Ice need to exchange skin tones.

4TheTurnstiles July 21, 2011 at 1:55 pm

How long before he goes for the Jew-gular, ala Jesse Jackson?

"Don't let me down… Hymietown"

emmelemm July 21, 2011 at 2:33 pm

Nice!

Also, he's from Florida. So if he does go nut-so on the Jews, it should be easier to do a campaign against him a la the Sarah Silverman "go to Florida and help your Jewish grandparents to vote" thing. (That was a thing, right?)

Biel_ze_Bubba July 22, 2011 at 3:14 am

♫♪ Well, I
Talk about it, Talk about it, Talk about it, Talk about it,
Talk about, Talk about, Talk about movin.

Gotta move on, Gotta move on, Gotta move on.

Won't you take me to
Hymietown. ♫♪

imissopus July 21, 2011 at 1:55 pm

West added, "All these liberals need to unbunch their panties and get over it."

freakishlywrong July 21, 2011 at 1:57 pm

"The hard left"..what the fuck does that even mean? Used in a sentence; I'd like to punch a hard left at this misogynistic dildo's crotch. OK, now I get it.

ArmoredLibunatic July 21, 2011 at 2:06 pm

I don't know, I think he's implying that I have a backbone or something.

anniegetyerfun July 21, 2011 at 2:35 pm

Didn't Clinton's list a little to the left when hard?

freakishlywrong July 21, 2011 at 2:37 pm

Contrary to the rumors, I'm NOT Monica Lewinsky.

anniegetyerfun July 21, 2011 at 3:27 pm

Please, like she'd be smart enough to survive here for a day.

ETA: Oops, I hate women.

Nothingisamiss July 21, 2011 at 2:52 pm

Where I think you're going wrong here is trying to create sense out of actual words spoken/written/tweeted by an angry retard.

LetUsBray July 21, 2011 at 4:37 pm

As a registered Democratic voter, I believe that makes me a member of the flaccid left.

ThundercatHo July 21, 2011 at 6:03 pm

I thought it was a NASCAR reference.

widestanceroman July 21, 2011 at 1:57 pm

Thanks to this man's courage, I am now terrified that my African American partner of a dozen years will find out about my true racist nature.

ThundercatHo July 21, 2011 at 1:58 pm

Wait, I'm confused. Is the 21st century plantation in the inner city? What do they grow there? Did they blacks harvest this crop (asphalt?) before all their jobs were stolen by illegal immigrants? What does this have to do with Allen West being a mysogynistic asshat?

riverside68 July 21, 2011 at 2:54 pm

You do not want to get into a discussion of plantations on this blog.

Just warning you, there was a 32 comment discussion yesterday on that word.

Biel_ze_Bubba July 22, 2011 at 3:16 am

But they're great, if you cut 'em up and pan-fry them.

DashboardBuddha July 21, 2011 at 1:58 pm
FirstUntieMe July 21, 2011 at 1:58 pm

Allen West is a House Nigger.

Crank_Tango July 21, 2011 at 1:59 pm

I dunno, I kinda think I could go racist for Allen West.

Radiotherapy® July 21, 2011 at 1:59 pm

I heard this shit last night on the Mark Levin comedy hour last night. The best part was at the end when he wanted all the listeners to go to West's website and donate to his campaign.
Funny comments from a guy who resides " in Plantation, FL.

metamarcisf July 21, 2011 at 3:20 pm

What's also funny is that there is a sort of right-wing backlash against West. It began with his indeciperable vote "for" the Pigford Settlement and has mushroomed into a conspiracy theory about him all of a sudden being everywhere on the right-wing web, ostensibly to boost his fund-raising.

comrad_darkness July 21, 2011 at 7:15 pm

You can't get to overexposed without going through "black" first?

qwerty42 July 21, 2011 at 1:59 pm

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

horsedreamer_1 July 21, 2011 at 2:00 pm

I think Allen's signals got crossed & he mixed up Will Smith's character from '99 with Will Smith as Muhammad Ali.

qwerty42 July 21, 2011 at 2:01 pm

"People on the hard left can … blah, blah blah"
What exactly is the "hard left" in the USA? The Wobblies? Not sure West even understands that kind of stuff.

Doktor Zoom July 21, 2011 at 2:07 pm

My married lover (R-ID) was on a hard leftist just a little while ago, but now she's gone home.

Sharkey July 21, 2011 at 2:20 pm

You go out 66, get off at the parkway, and take the second exit. About a half mile up the road, watch out for the hard left.

James Michael Curley July 21, 2011 at 2:48 pm

Then " take a right at the light, keep goin' straight until night, and then boy, you're on your own"

comrad_darkness July 21, 2011 at 7:13 pm

I think we should put some mountains here. Otherwise, what are all the characters going to fall off of?

SayItWithWookies July 21, 2011 at 2:01 pm

Wasserman-Schultz calmly wonders how West can vote to cut aid to his elderly and poor constituents, and West's response is to explode in a vile tirade of personal and mysogynistic attacks totally unbefitting an elected representative, then blame Wasserman-Schultz for releasing said attack to the public, then hiding behind his race. Really, it's only a matter of time before someone opens his freezer and finds it full of random body parts wrapped in cellophane.

Radiotherapy® July 21, 2011 at 3:00 pm

What do you want from a guy who should have been court-martialled and slinked out of a war crime?

OneYieldRegular July 21, 2011 at 2:01 pm

"I'd rather be black than female." – Shirley Chisholm

Biel_ze_Bubba July 22, 2011 at 3:18 am

That's what he said.

fuflans July 21, 2011 at 2:02 pm

so i see we've moved from bachmann week to west wingnut week.

Nothingisamiss July 21, 2011 at 2:53 pm

It's fun because there are so many to choose from.

donner_froh July 21, 2011 at 2:02 pm

Dear Allen West:

If you torture prisoners you are a disgusting human being. You tortured prisoners.

See? Race isn't a part of the equation at all.

Signed,

Your Biggest Fan

Biel_ze_Bubba July 21, 2011 at 3:01 pm

Just don't criticize him for doing it — that's racist.

Doktor Zoom July 21, 2011 at 2:02 pm

Allen West, you are NOT a lady.

GOPCrusher July 21, 2011 at 3:08 pm

I read that in Maury Povich's voice.

ttommyunger July 21, 2011 at 2:03 pm

"Am I gonna have to slap a bitch to get some respect? AM I ? Now look what you gone and done made me do.

LettucePrey July 21, 2011 at 2:14 pm

"Bitches ain't shit but ho's and tricks." ~ Mohandas Gandhi

ttommyunger July 21, 2011 at 5:54 pm

This assclown has as much business in Congress as I do. What the fuck are those people in FL smoking?

Dashboard_Jesus July 22, 2011 at 1:20 am

Rick Scott's butthole? oh wait, I thought you said 'sniffing'

ttommyunger July 22, 2011 at 9:54 am

Unbelievable! I'm old, but I'm not crazy. Rick has killed more people than I have fer Chrissakes.

ArmoredLibunatic July 21, 2011 at 2:04 pm

Oh, go mock-execute a puppy, you spaz.

BlueMonkeh July 21, 2011 at 2:10 pm

++++++++++++++

LettucePrey July 21, 2011 at 2:08 pm

Hey, "Plantation Honey Train" is the name of my alt-country/lite-emo/post-punk band!

Look for us in Bakersfield, when we open for Lady Antebellum.

horsedreamer_1 July 21, 2011 at 3:09 pm

Hit me with your Bloodshot. Fire away!

franco_pinyon July 21, 2011 at 2:08 pm

This is like watching Stan Laurel & Oliver Hardy put up wallpaper. The more he tries, the more entagled he gets.

Also, it's funny.

BlueMonkeh July 21, 2011 at 2:08 pm

Seems a mite bit excited over the hard left, no?

LouBristol July 21, 2011 at 2:09 pm

What about those who call him a cunt?

freakishlywrong July 21, 2011 at 2:19 pm

Worse than racists and sexists. Leftists!

Limeylizzie July 22, 2011 at 3:27 pm

I'm going with cuntish, dopey wog.

Barb July 22, 2011 at 4:32 pm

Lizzie, did you get the role you auditioned for?

Limeylizzie July 22, 2011 at 4:43 pm

Don't know yet, but the character was based on Christopher Hitchens but apparently they were”open” to a woman, which means if they find a man who is British and vaguely intellectual he will get it!

Negropolis July 22, 2011 at 7:59 pm

LoL! It's funny (and sad) 'cause it's true. :(

V572 Hair of Destiny July 21, 2011 at 2:11 pm

Where's your "plantation Republican" now, hard left?

inapewetrust July 21, 2011 at 2:11 pm

yes, yes, we are all deeply threatened by allen west.

TanzbodenKoenig July 21, 2011 at 2:11 pm

Hey West, why is it it you left the army again? Oh yea, you were to violent and unstable even for them, but I guess that makes you perfect for the Tea Party.

PuckStopsHere July 21, 2011 at 2:11 pm

Allen West doesn't care about black people…

Goonemeritus July 21, 2011 at 2:12 pm

So he has gone from a public school to the military and then to congress. Why does Representative West hate private industry so much?

freakishlywrong July 21, 2011 at 2:20 pm

Amazing, right? He has yet to be fapped by the invisible hand.

PuckStopsHere July 21, 2011 at 2:14 pm

But at least Marcus Bachmann is still a lady, right?

Poindexter718 July 21, 2011 at 2:14 pm

In the black vernacular, is "reverberating and resonating" anything like "Flaking and perpatrating"?
Thx!

elviouslyqueer July 21, 2011 at 2:15 pm

Nigga Bitch, please.

zappadoo76 July 21, 2011 at 2:15 pm

Do Debbie and Allen get their hair done at the same light socket?

chicken_thief July 21, 2011 at 3:21 pm

Hey! I like the Debbie jewish princess curls look. I'd do her.

Negropolis July 22, 2011 at 12:15 am

Debbie Allen!

HelmutNewton July 21, 2011 at 2:16 pm

Boy, those Plantation Republicans have some choot-spa!

Nothingisamiss July 21, 2011 at 2:55 pm

reallly, a win for the meme mix. ++

occams8ball July 21, 2011 at 2:17 pm

What the hell is a "BINO" anyway?

James Michael Curley July 21, 2011 at 2:20 pm

I've met a lot of military, exmilitary and veterans with the same attitude as West. Think its the salt peter they put in the mashed potatos in basic.

mavenmaven July 21, 2011 at 2:21 pm

I guess its to be expected, he wasn't too good with the ladies when he was younger, either: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FnXEPXdB3-w

SorosBot July 21, 2011 at 2:22 pm

West claims the left hates him because he "got of their 21st Century plantation," even though he actually got on the 21st Century plantation, alongside Alan Keyes and Uncle Clarence Thomas.

BaldarTFlagass July 21, 2011 at 2:43 pm

One man's plantation is another man's free-market invisible-handed paradise.

CrunchyKnee July 21, 2011 at 2:25 pm

Repulicans can never "man up" to their own faults, it's always the other person or group's fault. Victims 4 life I tells ya.

Crank_Tango July 21, 2011 at 2:43 pm

I think that was an NWA album… Efil4smitciV

BlueStateLibel July 21, 2011 at 2:58 pm

Republicans are more like trigger-happy paranoid schizophrenics.

seppdecker July 21, 2011 at 2:27 pm

"double-dildo victimizing"

You just subjected me to a double nostril, reverse iced-tea enema.

Crank_Tango July 21, 2011 at 2:44 pm

sounds like a tea party to me!

El Pinche July 21, 2011 at 2:28 pm

I went from being a slave on a plantation to being servant at the HonkeyBaggerville Country Club. Someday you will have a nice place like this with hard work.

anniegetyerfun July 21, 2011 at 2:30 pm

Haha, has anyone else in the GOP gotten this memo re: Obama?

Yes, they received it. And they used it to wipe up their own dribbling Santorum.

AbsolutNathan July 21, 2011 at 2:30 pm

Don't worry–you're not "THE BLACK" raging misogynist; we recognize you're just a raging misogynist who "HAPPENS TO BE" black.

phlox✔ July 21, 2011 at 2:32 pm

He should also write a strong-worded letter to his Congressman Lady.

Redhead July 21, 2011 at 2:36 pm

"they cannot afford to have a strong voice such as mine out there, reverberating and resonating across this country."

Meth does make you tend to talk loudly.

Barrelhse July 21, 2011 at 2:37 pm

Don't tell me West is to going to announce, too. All the bugs are coming out of the woodwork for the GOP, and not one of them is qualified to lead this country.

greypanter July 21, 2011 at 2:39 pm

Nothing resonates like the man whose ego dildo has found the resonance frequency of his inflated self image bone. My computer monitor practically vibrates itself off of the desk in the sway of his image.

Nothingisamiss July 21, 2011 at 2:56 pm

+++++ and plus and win.

ingloriousbytch July 21, 2011 at 2:41 pm

I get so sick of having to explain this. Allan, we don't attack you for being a black conservative. We attack you for being a douche and not the Massengill type available in a convenient 4-pack. You sir, are the kind of douche that my grandmother used to keep hanging in the shower: the rubbery kind that smelled of vinegar and we had to pretend we didn't see.

cc: Herman Cain

BlueStateLibel July 21, 2011 at 2:44 pm

Stop it with the stupid "hard left." You'll know hard left when they come lining people up against a wall and nationalizing everything from Exxon to the 7-11. Just because we don't want to raid SSI for billionaire's tax cuts isn't hard left, idiot.

fartknocker July 21, 2011 at 2:46 pm

See, we in Texas don't have the complete collection of stupid, racists, homophobic, sexist, execution-loving whack jobs. Florida now takes the lead.

Put your big boy pants on Arizona or Indiana – it's your turn.

And fellow Texans don't be disenchanted. Big Chief Rick Pretty Hair will be having his Prayerapooloza in Houston in 2 weeks. We'll soon be number 1 in crazy people.

PS: Al Franken is awesome.

donner_froh July 21, 2011 at 2:51 pm

West is pretty new at the "being crazy while a member of the House of Representatives" game. Bachmann is the undisputed leader, both Steve King of Iowa, Peter King of Lon Guy Land are formidable competitors and there are plenty of others.

But he is off to a great start–a hair trigger temper combined with not understanding social norms should take him a long way.

James Michael Curley July 21, 2011 at 2:53 pm

Before Amtrack I once took the 21st Century Plantation to Chicago. Moon light over the lake, great veal in the dining car.

starfanglednut July 21, 2011 at 3:00 pm

Anyone who calls a black conservative man on sexism is a racist.
Anyone who calls a white conservative woman on racism is a sexist.

Got it. Reality according to tea party.

SorosBot July 21, 2011 at 3:21 pm

All criticism of black conservatives is racist, and all criticism of conservative women is sexist. It's simple; the right tends to pretend that sexism and racism don't exist, that unless some shouts out "I hate black people / women" anytime someone calls out racism or sexism it's just whining or "pulling the race card"; therefore it's just a reaction to criticism of a woman or racial minority, not statements that actually are racist or sexist.

Note that it's different with hatred of gay people and non-Christians; most of the right openly admit that they think those forms of bigotry are perfectly OK (well except when it comes to antisemitism; they pretend to condemn it unlike hatred of Muslims or atheists but really think it's fine).

starfanglednut July 21, 2011 at 3:47 pm

Anyone who calls out a gay conservative on…. ah…. is um… er…Oh fuck it.

Naked_Bunny July 21, 2011 at 3:05 pm

I grew up in the inner city

"Now that I no longer need government assistance, I want to take it away from everyone else."

strong values

"People who benefit from government programs don't have values."

military family and background

"Er…except for that one."

donner_froh July 21, 2011 at 3:05 pm

Hard left for teabaggers = raise taxes on the wealthiest 10 percent of the population.

Hard left in reality = smash the state and build communism.

Blendergoathead July 21, 2011 at 3:13 pm

If by "racist" West means "hates fuckwits," I'm guilty as hell and proud of it.

GOPCrusher July 21, 2011 at 3:15 pm

I wonder if any of these morans ever stop to consider that no one takes the time to criticize people who don't say stupid shit.

Weenus299 July 21, 2011 at 3:16 pm

Today, we are all racists.

MarcusBarbarian July 21, 2011 at 3:26 pm

Hard left? Sounds like somebody needs to be disciplined.

orygoon July 21, 2011 at 3:28 pm

A "strong military backgroud" and an "grew up in an inner city" sound contradictory (says this military brat). And lo, what does the wikipedia say? It says that "His father and older brother were both career military officers:"

There aren't many ghetto bases. I can't think of any, actually. What a POS liar.

ShaveTheWhales July 21, 2011 at 11:51 pm

Thank you. I wondered about that.

ellislacroix July 21, 2011 at 3:34 pm

From Wikipedia:
West and his wife "currently reside in Plantation, Florida"

Fox n Fiends July 21, 2011 at 3:36 pm

we call that lame excuse the HIGH TOP FADE

Chet Kincaid July 21, 2011 at 3:40 pm

Next, he'll be claiming that muslims are plotting to fly a plane into his fade.

whiterabid July 21, 2011 at 3:54 pm

"I’m the threat because I’m the guy that got off their 21st-century plantation, and they cannot afford to have a strong voice such as mine out there, reverberating and resonating across this country.”

I'm sorry, I don't speak jive. No, wait. That was 20th century, and this is…

Never mind.

Chet Kincaid July 21, 2011 at 3:54 pm

Is this what they call "meeting cute" in the rom-coms?

Chet Kincaid July 21, 2011 at 3:59 pm

This reminds me of when McCain started acting a goddamned fool early in Obama's Senatorship, writing a nasty personal letter to complain about some Barry-double-cross that existed in his doddering brain only.

Chet Kincaid July 21, 2011 at 4:17 pm

Keith Ellison, evil muslin congressman and frequent attempted whipping boy of Cain and West, tells it like it is:
http://www.salon.com/news/politics/war_room/2011/

GOPCrusher July 21, 2011 at 4:45 pm

I'd have to agree with Rep. Ellison, I think Cain and other Republiklans do repeat their anti-Muslim screeds on purpose. And to keep their name in the news. And I would take it a step further, and say they do it in hopes of provoking a negative reaction from the American Muslim community.

thefrontpage July 21, 2011 at 4:24 pm

Allan West is a racist and a sexist.

He should resign from Congress, effective immediately.

timbo71351 July 21, 2011 at 4:38 pm

This issue isn't your skin color or politics. It's that you are a crazy asshole from some gerrymandered to fuck district who hangs out with motorcycle gangs.

flamingpdog July 21, 2011 at 4:45 pm

Allan West gets a AAA rating in my book – African American Asshole.

Chet Kincaid July 21, 2011 at 5:19 pm

Here's a nice summary of Allen West mental instability:
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/meet-allen-

Quite clearly the mentality of a "leader" who would be killing his political enemies in a less-developed country.

Or maybe I have the black conservatives all wrong! Maybe the entire movement is a giant put-on, like the Zulu Krewe at Mardi Gras, satirizing pompous white bigots!

mumbly_joe July 21, 2011 at 7:17 pm

I have to say, seeing the Zulu parade was one of my favorite things about Mardi Gras when I went down there, a few years ago. It's right up there with all the titties.

Chet Kincaid July 21, 2011 at 10:57 pm

Titties in N'awlins? I thought you had to go all the way to Rio Carnival for that action!

ragnarok4msm July 21, 2011 at 5:51 pm

THe bitch was being a bitch And Allen called her on it.Don't hear the outrage at the OVERLY MORE PERSONAL INSULTS against PAlin or BAchmann. AND NO I DONT CARE FOR THOSE TWITS EITHER

glamourdammerung July 21, 2011 at 6:39 pm

Cry more.

comrad_darkness July 21, 2011 at 7:37 pm

She referred to him by name, where exactly?

Brother thinks everything is about him. That doesn't tell us anything at all about him, does it?

ragnarok4msm July 21, 2011 at 7:59 pm

THE GENTLEMAN FROM SOUTH FLORIDA(her words) who just left the room.HINT: his name was WEST. Let me dumb it down for you, WWE style, MIZ: REALLY? REALLY?

glamourdammerung July 22, 2011 at 2:09 am

Care to point out the personal insults she made?

__kth__ July 21, 2011 at 6:24 pm

Shorter Allen West: the 95% of blacks who vote Democratic are every bit as dumb, shiftless, and immoral as the KKK says they are.

comrad_darkness July 21, 2011 at 7:05 pm

> came from a strong military family and background

Yeah. You were government employees sucking down government benefits. This totally invalidates, er, something.

comrad_darkness July 21, 2011 at 7:33 pm

It's tough out there for a sexist brother who only has a race card to play.

raygotaway July 21, 2011 at 7:35 pm

How's that war crimes thing going, Allen?

comrad_darkness July 21, 2011 at 7:43 pm

For a guy who claims he would willingly carry "gasoline into hell" he sure has awfully thin and delicate skin.

PristineODummy July 21, 2011 at 7:58 pm

Sweet sufferin' Christ! Why is Teh Stoopid Man doubling down on Teh Stoopid?*

(*Not a trick question.)

Negropolis July 22, 2011 at 12:00 am

He got off the 21st Century Plantation and then quite actually moved to a place named Plantation. Fuck you, you clueless creep.

This guy is a sociopath, and I mean that seriously. You don't have to have a degree to see that. This guy is even more of an ego than Kanye West, and something than a bit more strange than Adam West.

Honestly, don't ever trust a grown-ass black man in this day and age with a flattop.

An_Outhouse July 22, 2011 at 9:35 am

With my new purple pill prescription, I am pleased to be a proud member of the hard left.

L188188 July 22, 2011 at 1:03 pm

You know, I think you have your pill marketing programs mixed up. That purple pill is just Nexium for your heartburn. Your dick is still going to be soft unless you get some BLUE pills.

spinozasgod July 22, 2011 at 1:42 pm

I am trying to figure out how he was raised in the inner city and came from a military family……what military base is in the inner city? Don't military families live in base housing? Is this the "vanillia Ice" version of being from the inner city?

BZ1 July 23, 2011 at 11:54 am

Doesn't disgraced Col Allen live in a district called "plantation"? No irony here???

Barb July 21, 2011 at 3:00 pm

The Smurf movie comes out next Friday. I expect that will crush Undefeated. Why not, everything else has.

gullywompr July 21, 2011 at 10:24 pm

Is it just me, or are colonels the only ones who think they out-rank a civilian? They are the only rank that has ever tried to make me feel like an inferior.

Except this one Lieutenant, but he was a DBA, so being a jerk was part of the job description.

bumfug July 21, 2011 at 11:26 pm

The really dumb ones are the guys who think they really have more power than an NCO. There was this one asshole, a bird colonel, post IG, on the list for a star, thought he was king of the world. Took me two minutes to get him thrown out of the army – "conduct unbecoming an officer", "perjury", "filing a false customs declaration", "mailing prohibited items", etc. Fuck 'em, don't be an asshole. Coulda been worse, back during Vietnam guys would just throw a grenade in on them.

Limeylizzie July 22, 2011 at 8:08 pm

Happens all the time, they are “open” to a minority or a woman, but the white man always gets the role!

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