Unrepentant demon overlord Rupert Murdoch and son are busy promising the British Parliament today that they had no knowledge about any of the hacking going on at News of the World previous to the scandal breaking, a ludicrous suggestion that ranks up there with “9/11 was done by the Jews” for accuracy. But Murdoch did at least admit that he regularly butt penetrates Prime Minister David Cameron. UPDATE: An activist (this guy?) tried to throw a pie at Murdoch during the hearing, which will now be “Britain’s Iraqi shoe-thrower moment” but with pies, because that is the highest form of insult in that country.
Everybody in the room laughed at the buttsex joke, because Murdoch and Cameron are both old and gross. Haha, world leaders regularly request an evil corporate colon dusting from their owners.
Beside the pie-throwing moment which is now all anyone will remember, Murdoch Senior for his part mostly just kept yelling, “HUNNFGRHHH?” and slapping the table at everyone because he is old and he can’t hear things he doesn’t like. James Murdoch said the phrase, “I have no knowledge of that” 395 times with his “I randomly swallow my vowels” accent over the course of the hearing. NEEDZ MOAR EVIL because this is otherwise very boring and unsatisfying. AND THAT IS WHAT PUBLIC TRIALS OR WHATEVER ARE FOR, pieing shameless villains, Monty Python lives, etc.
Oh yes and what else:
- The whistleblower who started this entire scandal mysteriously turned up dead. No one immediately infer anything from this.
- The husband of disgraced former News of the World editor Rebekah Brooks tried to ditch his laptop, phone and papers in a trash can outside their house and then told police who found it that a friend was just leaving it there for him to pick up later.
- And now there are rumors Rupert Murdoch will resign as CEO of News Corp. Haha, this would be like when Putin “stepped down” from the Russian presidency he still runs.