Nut-flavored poopsicle Michele Bachmann was visiting flood-affected regions along the Missouri River when she was asked a very simple question about whether she thought proposed government cuts to the USDA should worry farmers needing help because of the damage. Normally Bachmann would get going on her “government isn’t here to solve your problems” speech, but… oh, uh hey, everyone here is white, right? Yeah okay, so here’s the real problem, everyone: black farmers stole the money that Michele would have given you. If those black farmers would stop asking for government money, Michele would hand it right back out to some of the actually needy white farmers!
Michele is illogically referring to a class action lawsuit in which black farmers won a case against the USDA for decades-long discrimination in handing out loans and farm aid, a payment which has cost over a billion dollars to date. Michele incorrectly understands this as “wasteful spending” since it is not a budget item but rather something a court legally ordered the U.S. government to pay. It’s not like she went to “law school” or anything guys, what do you want from her?
From the AP:
Republican presidential candidate Michele Bachmann pointed to one program in particular Monday when talking about wasteful government spending: a multibillion dollar settlement paid to black farmers, who claim the federal government discriminated against them for decades in awarding loans and other aid.
The issue came up after Bachmann and Republican Rep. Steve King of Iowa toured flooded areas along the Missouri River. During a news conference, they fielded a question about whether farmers affected by the flooding also should be worried by proposed U.S. Department of Agriculture cuts.
The two responded by criticizing a 1999 settlement in what is known as the Pigford case, after the original plaintiff, North Carolina farmer Timothy Pigford. Late last year, President Barack Obama signed legislation authorizing a new, nearly $1.2 billion settlement for people who were denied payments in the earlier one because they missed deadlines for filing.
This from a question about whether the government should consider easing back on cuts to the USDA. [AP]
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Whereas Miche1e's farm subsidies are something she's earned and richly deserves.
that bitch
Crunt
Twunt.
Crunt = Crusty Cunt?
V, I am watching Murdoch now. I forgot, did you and I agree to speak in fake Aussie accents today?
Ee'm deeing Nee Zeeland, eef eye meee. [There's only one vowel in New Zealandese, and it's "e."]
Is it more of a pirate type aussie or a Crocodile DunDee thing? Damn, why am I craving a blooming onion, all of a sudden?
Aussie, Aussie, Aussie
OY, OY, OY
Only 70 days 'til Speak Like a Pirate Day – Sept. 19.
Murdoch's from the west island, ain't e?
Reet ye be, maite. But I can’t do Aussie.
In terrible faux-Australian accent:
Rollo Lee: I think the whole Octopus philosophy is poison. The only aim of any and every McCain business is to downsize and halve the quality, to make enough money to acquire another business to downsize and halve the quality, to make enough money to acquire *another* business to downsize, etc., etc., without ever running a single one of them really well.
And if anyone ever raises the question of quality, they're immediately attacked as an elitist, because at Octopus it's considered morally offensive to talk about anything but money.
All so that Mr. Rod McCain can feel a little more powerful every day. That's why, instead of running this *wonderful* zoo – properly – we've got to spoil it in order to finance his next *mindless* acquisition.
I'm listening, and this seems to be the bulk of Murdoch Jr.'s answers: Um, um, um, um…
And according to what he says, he apparently knows nothing about what anyone who works under him does. Riiight.
Hey, that's exactly what Pol Pot said in his defense.
Reagan, too.
There has got to be some kind of internet law that predicts the use of that reference in an argument…
and senior's response seems to be 'derp'.
A live-blog would've been nice.
*sigh*
She sure has a lot of chootzpah!
She's such a gentile…no, wait, a yenta. No that's not it. She's mental.
She has rocks in her head.
The word is SCHMUCK, gentlemen.
Please, let's not demean them by calling them "subsidies," which are always government handouts to lazy browns. White people don't get subsidies from the government. They get the tribute from society their birthright justly demands.
It's like how about 40% of people on Medicare, and 44% of people on Social Security, say they have never used a government program.
She didn't take a single penny of that money. NOT ONE PENNY.
More like $100,000 worth of them, but technically, that is not ONE penny.
She got checks in the mail – absolutely true she didn't touch one penny.
Oh Jesus Christ these idiots.
Is there no tragedy that they don't see as an opportunity?
Take chicken shit, make chicken
saladshit.GIGO.
Michele has called out President Obama for not personally showing up along the Missouri River to help fill sandbags. Of course, this was from the comfort of the air conditioned airplane that she and Steve King were flying in.
The president's a little busy trying to keep the world economy from melting down…you know, the job he wouldn't have to do if KIng and Bachmann were in D.C. acting like reasonable, intelligent, responsible members of Congress.
This harpy has no shame.
Edit: Silly me…in order to have shame, one must have a conscience, and to have a conscience, one must be conscious, and to be conscious one must have a brain.
Fuck her.
You fuck her, you brought her!
I wouldn't fuck her with Newt Gingrich's dick.
Worst slashfic ever.
Thanks, but. Even in my desperate days, I've never been *that* desperate. I mean, look at the bitch. You'd be terrified to get any of your naughtier parts near her in case she gnawed right through them in a mindless frenzy.
She had one once, but gave it up when she was 12. Since then a small implanted talking-points computer, linked to the Koch Brothers HQ has been doing all the jibber-jabbering she calls "speech."
Spare the Sherrod, you cannot properly propagandize the child, my grandpa used to say.
Blacks, gays, the Pope. She's an equal opportunity hateful bitch.
She makes Jesus cry.
Jesus: "Get off the cross Michele. I need it to club the fuck out of you."
Don't be so harsh, she's telling the truth. I personally get a check from the govt every month for growing the 2 basil plants in my front yard. Being black is such a sweet gig! Everybody should try it at least once, until the cops show up, that is.
The way she hates America for electing Democrats (or "un-Americans", as she calls them) … that is unforgivable.
Muslims next, you can be sure!
It's like Ann Coulter dyed her hair and got a sex change.
Between Ol' Crazy Eyes personally getting federal subsidies for both her farm and her anti-gheyness clinic, and Mooselini's milking of the wingtard spin machine, it's difficult to say who is the better grifter — but safe to say that both of them took post-doctoral courses.
That's not all — when she says she was a tax attorney, she somehow neglects to mention that her sole client was the IRS. For whom she sued taxpayers. Instead of making that clear, she just lets her audience assume that she was working for the people she pretends to champion, not against them.
Wait. Republicans being racist? SHOCKING. Your move, Herman Cain, also.
Yesterday, when we said Bachmann needed to step up the racist crazy after Cain's weekend Muslim-bashing, I thought we were only snarking.
"Growing up I encountered all sorts of racism: black racism, Democrat racism. You know some people were even racist against me for being too white. So I know all about racism. And that's when I decided the only way to beat bigotry was with the power of pizza. So I did what Martin Luther King did and rolled up my sleeves and got to work. 30 years later we have made a lot of pizzas and America is still the freest country on the planet."
I thought Herman Cain was proof positive that Republicans CAN'T be racist. Henngh?
I disagree. It was not blacks that were awarded the money. It was gay negro pretend farmers that STOLE the money.
These are DEFINITELY NOT farmers.
Nope, but they sure can plow!
TWO SNAPS UP!
I didn't realize the gay negro farmers were all into the Farmville and all.
"Gay negro pretend farmers" = Barbarian Democrat un-American narco-terrorists.
Stay classy, Michele! Don't forget to point out the wasteful government gay dick measuring — your husband would be disappointed.
Why would they have to measure the gay's dicks? Just ask them! Everyone knows they are vicious gossips.
Gaze talking dick is worse than fishermen talking fish.
Ain't got nothin to do with reality
But on the other hand, according to Heisenberg, as soon as you measure it, you have changed it.
WTF ya gonna do? Take the money and say what ever you feel like sayin.
And size queen braggarts. Srsly. How many gay men would ever say "Less!" if you posed Frank Z's famous question*?
(*FZ's famous question: "Eight inches or less?")
She's going to be reincarnated as a trash-picking 'untouchable' in Mumbai – I only wish I could get a preview.
I'm praying she comes back as a Santorium cleaner
wow. that's really good.
cheers!
Tapeworm
I was thinking maybe a bloated tick, but tapeworm is much better!
When Steve King and Miche1e Bachman get together, the confluence of stupidity and arrogance is frightening.
Oh and be sure to watch Wendy Murduch sitting behind Rupert, doing the "concerned wife" act. It's at http://msnbclive.eu/ for all you working stiffs.
Scary!
I'd want my Asian trophy wife to have a bigger rack. Maybe Rupert just can't afford to buy her a pair.
The vortex will suck the intelligence out of the population in a 150 mile radius and twist armpit hairs
I never gave his wife any thought, so why does it surprise me that she is half his age?
He's already gone through at least one.
Now I'm sad, realizing Wendi didn't give birth to James when she was 4 years old.
This is just an example of One L appealing to the GOP base…you know, Klan members.
~
How did this ruling slip past the greatest jurist in the History of the Republic, Clarence Thomas? Also, I'll just bet this is one issue upon which Shelly and Crazy Bread stand in complete and total agreement.
LOL
A sphincter says what?
pffffffffffttttttt
Exactly.
She'd probably defend the owners of a chicken processing plant in Hamlet, NC that caught fire in 1991. Almost all the employees died or were seriously hurt because of multiple safety violations, including blocking the fire exits. The reason? The employees might have stolen some chickens.
Plus they were mostly black. So, you know…no problem!
If they were already black how could they possibly PROVE they had been burned?????
The batter and bread crumbs would've given it away.
The problem probably came when they got a big settlement also. I'm not sure how much money they actually got, though.
How much the survivors got, that is.
Survivors — there's your problem, right there.
You know, we never had these kind of problems before that whole Emancipation thing. Jus' sayin.
You blamin this on the Republicans too?
Yes – because I can!
So "Abraham Lincoln (D)," then?
Fire exits?! That's just OSHA and their regulations that hamper small business from creating jobs. See, by blocking those exists that chicken plant required the services of grave-diggers and morticians. That's how so many jobs were created in the 90's.
Michele would also have wondered why the employees were bitching, because don't all blacks love fried chicken?
Do chickens love fried employees?
The employees might have stolen some
chickensshirtwaists.Fixed.
Upfist for the rememberance. Ah, those Triangle girls!
Is there some kind of government subsidy that can fund the implant of intelligence and logic in that woman?
There is always the Sharron Angle Second Amendment Solution. The effective dose is the same as the lethal dose, but I'd be willing to give it a shot.
Science has not yet progressed to the point of giving life and intelligence to a box of raocks. I hear, though, that the GOP cut funding for box-o-rocks research. So, it may take a few elections worth of overturning GOP/TP cuts to get us back to the science level of the 1830's, where their passion for ignorance has brought us.
If they had asked about drought, she would have blamed illegal immigrants drinking water as they snuck through the dessert.
I hate to be less than completely vicious and fun on Wonkette, but as far as I understand it, the money to black farmers who were discriminated against has yet to be paid out. And the money that has been earmarked and ordered by the courts for said payments is only a fraction of the loans that were not afforded to black farmers.
but…BLACK!
And the court award doesn't impact current farm aid budget, which is being cut by no budget Republicans.
Logic is irrelevant also
Hell, them black farmers don't need no damn money! They can sit around on their porches in their overalls and play "De Camptown Ladies" on their banjos and washtub bass. You know how it goes! "Oh, de Camptown Ladies sing dat song, doo dah…"
With apologies to Slim Pickens.
How about "Swing low, sweet chariot…"
Or that ol' spiritual, "Where de crazy white womens at?"
Nobody is EVER going to make anything funnier than "Blazing Saddles." It's my favourite post-surgery recuperation watchfest.
Steve King, who also appeared with Bachmann, called the Pigford settlement "modern-day reparations." What a douch.
Honestly, it will be news when Steve King manages to say something that isn't completely over-the-top racist. Srsly.
At least the rest of them try to hide it/ are able to switch to some mode other than "unreconstructed bigot", at least some of the time.
Well, in Steve King's defense, he doesn't have a lot of experience with urban people.
And thanks to redistricting, he's now my representative. Christie Vilsack can count one vote for her in 2012.
Fuck me, he is the ambulatory equivalent of an unemptied colostomy bag.
douche
After Trump dropped out of running (that he was only pretending to be considering to get attention for his TV show, but whatever), I wondered who would be the first to take up the mantle of overt race-baiting instead of using just the usual racist dog-whistles. Now I've got my answer.
She's just extremely inartful at using whistles. "Fraud", "Pigford", and "reparations" are all whistles that at least partially overlap the range of human hearing.
"I'd love to help you, but the [black/muslim/messican/gay/ schoolchild/old] over there has your money. Go get it from him!!!"
So, farm subsidies and assistance are okay, as long as you're white.
Yes. And preferably conservative xtian.
And male. Women and their lady bits are dirty.
The farmers that get the most aid are Mssrs. Archer, Midland, Daniels, and Conagra. Gentlemen farmers, one and all.
And they like to hire illegal aliens, too!
I've heard it said that there's an Evil Party and a Stupid Party in American politics. Bachmann is apparently running as a unity candidate!
Farm this, you crazy, bigoted bugeyed bitch.
they fielded a question about whether farmers affected by the flooding also should be worried by proposed U.S. Department of Agriculture cuts.
Being good e-coli Republicans, they bypassed the subject of food safety, too!
Automatic Republican response (wingtard version): "Negroes bad, whites good".
Ha ha ha. Black farmers. Bachmann knows that the only thing the blacks grow is pot in the ghettos.
America, we have a problem with hateful bitch clowns.
And the Sierra Club caused all the flooding to happen. Damn hippies did it. Seriously, this is the wingnut crap my mother-in-law was spouting the other night.
The Mooslims are also to blame.
OK, I am clueless as to how the Sierra Club is to blame for flooding. Did they insiste on preservation of trees that could magically turn into sandbags once cut?
She was babbling about keeping water or not keeping water in a reservoir in South Dakota or some shit. Who knows. Lady gets all her info from her wingnut husband and wingnut emails so S.C. might have been in league with Harry Potter and witches for all they "know" (a very loose term).
Probably a half-baked reference to the Ogllala Aquifer. It's running dry because of overuse by make-the-desert-bloom city planners across the west, with no time to recharge its water supply, but that won't show up in the conspiracy theories. It's been used in a couple of science fiction scenarios that are now being cited as facts in wingnut circles.
It's your run of the mill "they were protecting endangered species and fish and stuff instead of my business interests" wingnut crap.
And they're also trying to claim that the corps was secretely flooding everyone out to get them to sell their land because of some "smoking gun" letter – that they've been sending out since the 90s. Linkee at my other response.
Ha – i found it: idiots try to blame environmentalists for flooding. Stupid endangered species. I guess it's a good thing SD doesn't have real manatees.
No manatees? Have you ever been to a county fair?
"Some Say Environmental Groups Share Flooding Blame"
Surprisingly, this was an ABC news site reporting that 'Some Say …'.
Surprisingly?
Ai-yi-yiii!!! These motherfuckers have plumb gone loco! They need to watch "The Big Uneasy," Harry Shearer's film on what really happened in NOLA. You know, just to dispel this myth that Sierra Club environmentalist type hippehs are the ones controlling the Army Corps of Engineers.
??? I think I'd be divorcin' the bitch in a hail of bullets after the third round.
Why does she keep blowing the racist dog whistle? The teabaggers flock to her already like flies to shit. Seems redundant and wasteful
Now, a dog whistle is code; when she says something overtly racist like this, it's just being a racist (or courting the racist vote, which is just as bad).
The teabaggers, if experience means anything, don't understand nuance. Sometimes, you just have to hit them over the head.
You have to hit them over the head frequently since they have no memory
Squirrel!!
She enjoys it. Srsly. In her crazy little mind, the tinnitus only subsides when she gets full-throated roars of approbation from the equally crazy drowning out that annoying Pink Floyd buzzing in the background that signals the worms eating into her brain.
The fact that this crazy facebiter is even considered remotely serious speaks volumes about our dreadful electorate; the creation of our supremely sucky media.
And teatards are stealing New Jersey transportation funds to help the flooded Midwest! I thought those people believed in pulling themselves up by the bootstraps?
http://www.nj.com/news/index.ssf/2011/06/nj_trans...
No one will EVER say, "Look at the big brain on Michele."
Does this mean Vilsack is going to can someone else? Aren't the unemployment lines long enough?!
Predict the next racist thing!
So far we've got:
Cain: No muslims here!
Bachmann: No freebies for the blacks!
Possible future statements?
Pawlenty: While I can understand how Greek people like each other, we don't have to like them.
Romney: As much as I hate Serbians, we can all agree that Japanese people are way worse.
GIngrich: I'm not actually still in this, am I? Really? Um… Koreans? Eat dogs? Something like that?
For racism gotta stick with the holy trinity: Blacks, Muslins, Hispanics
Thus next up is something about the border or english only
(Anti-women is the rhythm section)
There's always the jooz and their hard to pronounce words.
Belgians. I hate Belgians.
What, no more Polak jokes?
The settlement of the Pigford case came about after years of investigation, litigation and negotiation. An imperfect process I am sure but ultimately some measure of justice was achieved. For Rep. Bachmann to use this as a wedge issue is irresponsible and demagogic. Hopefully voters are capable of seeing this and will reject her at the polls. In a just world this is the implosion that we have all seen coming.
"Hopefully voters are capable of seeing this and will reject her at the polls."
Oh hahaha little mannacler, dream on silly dreamer. You're talking about Iowa.
Hopefully voters are capable of seeing this and will reject her at the polls. In a just world this is the implosion that we have all seen coming.
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!1111!!!!!111!!
Oh, youse guys are just so fucking cruel, yaknow? Let the little dreamer dream his sweet, naive little dream, why don'tcha?
In a just world this is the implosion that we have all seen coming.
Oh no no, this is bush league stuff (NPI). I've already predicted that the implosion will be when undercover video surfaces of hubby Marcus "ministering" to one of his male clients by way of teh buttsecks.
Can't you tell them to hurry up with that vid already?
You are right, and your moral outrage is admirable, however, given the forum, I must regrettably point at your comment and laugh, manically and hysterically. To keep from crying.
You're adorable!
I live in Iowa. This plays right in to the hearts and minds of the average Iowan Republiklan Caucus goer.
If she doesn't implode within the next month, I can even see Pawlenty throwing up his hands and saying "Fuck it" and moving on to New Hampshire.
upfisted for the funniest post in the thread.
I do believe you just guaranteed that the electorate will go nuts about the issue.
This horrible excuse for a human being being taken seriously as a national candidate shows this country isn't ready for participatory democracy.
I just read some FP article on the Hapsburg dead guy's funeral and how Austria is now around 27% behind the nutzo rightwing immigrant hating political assholes. 27% seems to be the universal baseline for crazy.
See polling results on questions about witches, the Earth being flat, etc. I think 20% is closer, but yes, there does appear to be a "20% agree with the craziest stuff" rule.
Here, let me fix that:
This horrible excuse for a human being being taken seriously as a national candidate shows this country is no longer ready for participatory democracy thanks to our media dumbing down the electorate and treating elections like sporting events.
Yes, she's a reprehensible idiot. But is it working?
"If refusing to pay a legal settlement to black farmers and instead giving that money to white homeowners is racist, well then I guess I'm a racist!"
Kinda long to fit on a t-shirt don't you think?
Michelle babes, I don't think you want to cross an old farmer named Pigford. I'm sure he has had a lifetime learning how to respond to irrational insults from white trash.
At the risk of coarsening this debate and fostering an air of incivility I must point out the she seems to be a racist cunt.
"The issue came up after Bachmann and Republican Rep. Steve King of Iowa toured flooded areas along the Missouri River."
The King/Bachmann lineup is the political equivalent of a Nickelback/Creed tour.
Nickelback/Creed? Really? That really happened?
Almost fell off my chair laughing.
Bachmann 2012: it's a no-brainer
Exacta-mundo!
I was tempted to say that the entire statement had to be a spoof because it’s just too ignorant even for a teabilly, but actually I think it’s just ignorant enough.
This reminds of the joke where a Koch, a teabagger, and a union member are sitting at a table that has a plate of 12 cookies on it. Koch takes 11 and then whispers to the teabagger that the union member is going to steal his 1/2 of the cookie.
Fabulous analogy for pretty much everything going on right now. Thank you.
No charge…I wish I could say I made it up.
As we all know from racial transcendence expert Andrew Breitbart, the Pigford decision is the worst sort of racism, since it was based on the race of the people who were discriminated against.
Need more Blazing Saddles to keep my head from exploding.
Guess Michele doesn't know, like Madeline Kahn, that "it's twue, it's twue".
Moar schnitzengruben?
Bitte, baby.
The thing of it is that she would never say any of this crazy stuff if she had a big fat dick in her throat.
Anybody else read about her terrible migraines that incapacitate her for days, with ample pill-popping? Apparently, even some of her staff are concerned about her ability to campaign, much less preside. Know hope:
http://dailycaller.com/2011/07/18/stress-related-...
Bachmann’s medical condition wouldn’t merit public attention, but for the fact she is running for president.
Yeah – never mind that having this type of psychological/medical problem might not just be the best mix for one of 435 people trusted with half of our lawmaking duties, let alone one of the most powerful and dangerous leadership positions on the planet.
Word.
Fucker Carlson's Gentleman Caller is slinging hit articles on Bachmann now? Teatards must scare the shit out of him!
Heavy narcotic usage causes insanity?
Does Rush Limbaugh know about this?
So the scenario is that President Bachmann institutes a raft of batshit crazy wingnut racist policies, and then requires four years of stress-free presidency. What could possibly go wrong?
Didn't her manager say somthing about "fact checking"? I mean settlement and spending are 2 diff…..Fuck it. Baconz getting drunk at 10AM. That's the only way I can handle this woman.
It's 5 o'clock SOMEwhere.
This makes all the sense in the world–if you are an idiot. People who have suffered discrimination at the hands of the racially biased Department of Agriculture should not be paid damages so those who haven't suffered discrimination can get paid.
White racists speaking to an all white crowd and telling them what they want to hear, not caring that their words are being heard and read all over the country.
Betting on the stupidity of the Amerikkkan voter is still a winner.
PT Barnum's first law of commerce, there's a sucker born every minute, still rulez.
Wait a minute, Oui-Ja. Wasn't it the Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh who said, "There's a seeker born every minute," just before he got into his Silver Shadow?
But that was in Oar-ee-gun and you know how those people are.
I thought it was a Japanese tentacle cartoonist who said, "There's, ah, sucker porn every minute."
Hentai!
My four-year-old will often yell something at the top of her lungs, then when I respond, say "No! I was talking to Mommy!"
This is kind of like that. It's even more bizarre than selective hearing. They completely don't understand how acoustics and language processing work.
So is Michele our next black Preznit? After all, she and her gaybag husband got monies for their farm from the gubmint. I guess that makes her the new urban candidate – amiright?
Well, she went to Regents, so it is exactly like she didn't go to law school.
Don't you have to take Oral history there, 'cause they burned all the books?
According to some of her ex-staff (and there are many many ex-bachmann staffers out there, apparently she really is a screaming diva whackjob nutcase and noone can work for her for long) she has really serious mental health issues, and she has weeekly breakdowns, completely incapacitating "headaches" that put her down for days, and for which she takes loads of meds. One of her staffers said these migraines could be triggered by "anything not going Michelle's way." Its seems the poor thing may not be ignorant and racist after all. She might just be batshit insane. Which was always obvious, anyway, from the eyes. Anyone remember the "runaway bride?"
And she has it pretty easy compared to being preznit.
It never ceases to amaze me that people whose goal is only to seek power are usually those unable to use it wisely or sanely.
Just thing…the finger that pushes the drug down her throat could be the same one that could push the Button.
Worse than that – those descriptions of health issues, both physical and mental, sound almost exactly like the surviving accounts of Caligula.
So, she has syphillis?
If only it was just syphilis (which was native to the Americas, thus unknown in Rome); but we're talking fevers with paranoia, periods of mania and vivid hallucinations, including the belief one is talking to the gods/god.
If these reports are true, Michele may well truly believe that god did literally tell her to run for President, and that she heard him tell her to do so.
Yeah, I was just being flip.
Recent sources are divided in attempting to ascribe a medical reason for Caligula's behavior, citing as possibilities encephalitis, epilepsy or meningitis. The question of whether or not Caligula was insane remains unanswered.
I don't think that History will be so kind to Michele…
I, for one, welcome our new equine overlords.
If just being a congress critter from some mild upper midwestern state stresses her out this much….we might see full-on Scanners action if she ever does get the nod.
I say, you go <crazy> girl!
That is something I would pay to see–her head literally, not metaphorically, exploding.
Apparently it is stressful, being batshit insane, and having to ignore the persistent attempts by reality to intrude on your delusions.
Especially a liberally-biased reality. That's really got to be a pain.
We should be so lucky as to have her disappear. She's too old to spark a media frenzy like Natalie Holloway & Co.
Can we hire Michael Jackson's doctor to "forget" to taper off her anesthesia one morning?
I'm beginning to think the poor woman has an undiagnosed brain tumor. No wonder her eyes pop out so much! The tumor is half of her head, now!
I'll say it again: X-rays of her head show nothing.
I'm completely comfortable with giving the nuclear arsenal launch codes to someone who hears voices.
Stanley Kubrick reference for the win! Wait, no … what?
Funny thing … ever since Marcus helped her pray away the gay, she gets these monstrous headaches.
Michelle would have rather spent the billion dollars on prayer rallies to call upon God, Satan or whatever to take away the flood waters.
I predict the next Bachmann interviews will start with "I am not a racist…"
Or "Some of my best friends are black".
Or "Some of my best friends are the blacks."
"I'm you"? Why not, it worked out so well for Xtine…
All this talk about Messicans and Islams is taking our eyes off the real enemy, the Blacks!
The "real enemy", I think, is Democrats. They aren't "real Americans", don'tcha know?
Demmycrats are mostly blacks, islams, messcans, homos and their white slaves.
Ah, its simple really. These pigs have no morals, no empathy, no consience.
I refuse to consider these people as conservatives. I have friends who are conservatives, they are fine people.
Ms. Bachmann and her ilk are terrorists pure and simple and a threat to the people and the nation. They should be dealt with accordingly.
SOF sniper teams, then? OK. I'll make the call.
It's the morally weak equivalent of Marcus trying to pray away the ghey.
Michele also pointed out that the floods were the Native Americans' fault for not constructing proper levee system.
Don't you mean a TEEPEE system? Hyuck, hyuck.
Actually, a system of portable housing that you could move out of the way of the annual floods, then move back in …. oh, the hell with it. We killed 'em and kicked them out, so really, how smart could they have been?
This must have been one of the Republican / Tea Party Talking Points Memo's of the weekend. Over the weekend my Tea Turd relatives were forwarding email chains about this shit. Of course the emails were a lot more colorful in describing the benefactors of the settlement.
If the nutty poopsicle is going to pander racists (tea party), go for the throat. BRING BACK SLAVERY!!
Don't you worry your pretty little head EP, it's all in the bible
Just as soon as they get rid of the taxes, that will be the very next thing.
On a quiet night you can hear the sheets rustling . . .
The Kochs are all over that shit.
I, for one, welcome my new white chattel underlings!
I trust you'll be kindly and paternalistic to your servants… they're not educated, is all.
But Rep. Bachmann-Krazy-Overdrive, according to that pledge you signed, Teh Blacks were better off in the slave days of yore. How can that be the case if they are now the beneficiaries of gov't sponsored stealing from Whitey?
Perhaps there is a compromise somewhere in the middle (I refer, of course, to sharecropping).
Slavery had a disastrous impact on African-American families, yet sadly a child born into slavery in 1860 was less likely to be coddled by government farm subsidies than was an African-American baby born after the election of the USA's first African-American President.
So good.
Does anyone else miss that douchebag Bush41?
I do miss a good, elite, east-coast blue blood conservative. Their motives (greed and power) made sense and they were willing to actually govern (even though I didn't agree with many of their actions) when handed the reigns of power.
Have to agree. Bush the 1st stopped short of Baghdad, didn't have (observable) oedipal issues, was an actual war hero, and a reliable emissary to funerals of departed heads of state. Whereas the son….aw fuck, who wants to remember that litany of FAIL?
well i'm certainly missing a viable opposition. i've never been a big fan of the dems and would like an actual debate in this country.
course, i still think mittens is going to get the nomination so all of this is the equivalent of the summer blockbuster.
Yeah, we all know it, but nobody can quite figure out how the GOP's owners are going to make it happen. That's quite a crowd of nutters out there, and it's going to take a lot of accidents, scandals, and mysterious ailments to take all of 'em out.
Step 1 is to squeeze the big donors – that took care of Gingrich already. Can't wait to see what misfortunes pile up on the rest of the field.
Despite his "Read my lips, no new taxes." statement, he was smart enough to see that you can't pay your bills without increasing revenue.
Only when I'm throwing the odd memorial shoe.
Shirley Sherrod Shall Rise Again!
This is no surprise. Bachmann hates n****rs gets 6.4M hits on Google. just sayin'
It's early on the day. The real number is more like 100M.
The plan she now recommends is that black folks can pick cotton in exchange for minimal room and board (for life), and their children can be "exchanged" to different cotton fields, which, of course, will also improve their lives, as is well known (cf. van der platz, et al).
Sort of like the NFL. Interesting.
Are you black? Yes
Did you attempt to farm? Yes
Here is a check.
F*ckin Bachmann trying to keep reparations from those poor victims of slavery and affirmative action!
I'm sure Obamas baby grandma is getting one.
Yup. Another *WIN for Delta Sharecroppers. Lucky bastards…
Yeah, she's more than a little insane. I think a nice hard round of buttsecks should break her out of her stupor. Not like she's getting anything at home.
Maybe that's ALL she gets at home, and only when she dresses up in a lumberjack outfit.
Not with those headaches!
(It is the head that's hurting, right?)
She is so ultra-sensitive to minorities. When she is in the White House, do you think she will continue the Obama tradition of holding a White House Passover Seder?
Of course; then she'll talk to all the Jewish invitees about Jesus and how he was their messiah.
May she choke on a piece of gefilte fish.
May matzo balls impact in her intestines and may the resulting surgery to remove them also remove her head from its current location.
Choot spa!
"Yup, I'm a racist."
For all this fraud that these hucksters complain about with the Pigford settlement, one would think they could provide evidence of it.
What does evidence have to do with it?
Evidence: Black farmers. CASE CLOSED
Gimme a break — who among the howling teatard mobs is asking for freaking evidence?
Uh-oh:
http://tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com/2011/07/poll-r...
This is good news for John McCain…and even better for Barry.
Pleezpleezpleez let the crazy bitch win PLEEZ. Obama will wipe the floors of the entire planet with her. If he can keep from LOLing, anyway.
What a twat. Does Bachmann have any idea how many millions of dollars in federal subsidies we give to Monsanto every year? I don't hear her quacking about that injustice.
Michelle Bachmann and Steve King can go fuck themselves with 18 inch, blight-ridden cucumbers.
But what would Kortney say?
hey give Michelle a break, she didn't attempt to fan the racial flames for at least a month after she announced. At least she didn't start her campaign in Philadelphia Miss. When the rapture comes she'll be up in heaven with all the white farmers anyway.
And some White Mormons in Las Vegas want to steal your river water…
this is just like snowgrifter: starts out as fun and batshit games and then they start showing how very ugly they are inside.
and then i can't stand listening to their stupid flat accents and shrieky voices.
way to go conservative ladies.
Just wait 'til Ole Crazy Eyes learns the Bureau of Indian Affairs has been shorting Native American oil royalty payments for the past, oh, five or six decades. At least.
Final settlement of the "Indian Trust Fund" debacle is going to make these payments look like a grade schooler's allowence.
Bastards In Action, as they are known on the Rez.
Just imagine being the poor intern that has to take away her chew-toy & get her to chase it into Congress on work-days.
That was brilliant!
And yes, I'd hate to be her body person because all the treats you'd have to keep in your pocket would ruin your suits after a while.
That's why we have little plastic baggies, hon. The treats go in there, and when they come out, you have something nice and "handy" to pick up with.
She's quit congress to run, hasn't she? So when she loses, we're shet of her for good. Or at least for a while.
This…individual is so irrevocably doomed to a public meltdown of such epic proportions that "Karma Police" should start playing whenever she makes an appearance. Just in case. Someday, incidents like these will serve as "remember that time" punchlines.
The Bachmanns, both Michelle and Marcus, need a nice long, thick Mandingo cock to ram the crazy out of them.
Gotta admit, Ms. Batshit Crazy is making things entertaining. She got the chootz-pah!
Wheee!
Biased lamestream media. I'm sure they're the ones who left out the part where she also criticized Junior Bush's FEMA giving millions to homeowners in Miami Beach whose houses were sprinkled on during a hurricane that happened somewhere else.
BECUZ THEY AR!!!!!!!!11
she goes runnin' – for the shelter
of her Bachmann's "little helper"…..
seriously though — only the Repukes could come up with somebody more horrifying & insane than Sarah Palin….
Bachmann knows that a government subsidy is "aid" if it's going to the people in front of her, it's "handouts" if it goes to people they don't like. Let's look forward to her presidency bringing back indentured servitude and calling it a jobs program.
Do any of those needy white farmboys own a TV?
"Nut flavored poopsicle"–ha, that's a keeper. Gonna have to steal that one.
Black black black derpa derp.
Do see smoke? Is that fire? I swear this cunt is flaming out right before our eyes.
MB is my hero. She makes dumb mighty tasty!
Ole Crazy Eyes followed up by asking why all those A-Rabs put their sandy countries on top of our oil.
Arr.
Avast
that is my favorite day.
The rating for the new Pirates of the Caribbean movie has been revised.
Now it's "Aarrrrrggghhh!"
More like "Eccchh."
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