The woman whose front-yard FLOTUS shrine almost landed her in jail is in the clear now, sort of! So nice try, obesity epidemic, you lose this one. The city of Oak Park, Michigan no longer cares about Julie Bass’ hideous vegetable garden. Instead, they would like to go after her dogs, because Oak Park is now Arizona, so everyone must show their papers, or else.
Julie Bass may still have to go to court this month — over her dogs.
Bass was cited in June with a misdemeanor for building the garden, which sits in five raised beds in the back part of her front yard behind grass. She said she had opted for the garden rather than flowers to create an educational tool and to have a few extra vegetables for the family.
That citation included violations for owning two unlicensed dogs. They are not licensed, but Bass said she took the vaccine information to court in June, where an impasse was reached over language in the ordinance and Bass asked for a jury trial. Her pretrial date for the garden issue had been set for July 26.
But Eugene Lumberg, city prosecutor, said he didn’t see the vaccine paperwork. He said that issue will be resolved as soon as he sees the paperwork.
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I bet those dogs have been voting illegally. No state approved license, NO vote.
What the fuck is wrong with someone growing a few vegetables in their garden on their property? How the hell do who ever think that people fed themselves since time began? Why has common sense become a lost art in America? Why am I talking to myself?
One of these days I'm just gonna stoke out after reading all the insanity that goes on in this country every freaking day! I should go watch some soothing FOX pseudo news and live in the land of Ignorance Is Bliss. Ugh. But I won't.
First they came for the garden, and I mocked them, because they were bureaucratic assholes
Then they came for the dogs, and I mocked them again, because they were still bureaucratic assholes
1) Neighbor sees garden.
2) Neighbor decides he doesn't like garden
3) Neighbor can't mind his own fucking business
4) Neighbor complains to the city bureaucrats
Repeat this process for the dogs. Next, up: her ugly beater Volvo.
I blame the neighbors
I think there is something bigger than a neighbor's complaint. The city seems to be going to a lot of trouble to send this person a message.
Well for the love of god, the dogs were brown!! You can't be too careful!
Hey Chihuahua, where's your papers?
Yo quiero Taco Bell!
World Net Daily is way ahead of you on this issue. Jerome Corsi's new book is entitled: "Where's the Dog License?"; to be followed by "Where Am I?"
She should keep the dogs in the back room for a few days, pick up the papers and submit them to the Court.
You gotta hand it to Ken Layne – this is like a scene in Dignity, writ small.
Historicat review of the book, which I finished over the weekend – more of a page-turner than I expected. A thought provoking read. Now I will resume licking myself.
Because you CAN, HistoriCat, because you CAN..
Don't forget to shit in the box.
is it time to "vote" again?
Thanks for the heads up – almost at a place where I can read the darn thing, finally.
I wasn't sure about getting the book – it's not my usual read. But I figured I owed Ken Layne the benefit of the doubt, what with being a loyal reader of Wonkette and all. The first night I stayed up an hour later than I planned because I kept not-stopping at the chapters.
You're right about supporting independent authors – we'll have to get together for a discussion about it on Wonktango – will bring the catnip.
You can bet that she'll be seriously watched for any code violation. Better not let that sidewalk in front of your house get uneven! Hope your trees aren't overhanging any neighbor's yard.
You expose petty, stupid, small town, busybody idiocy at your own peril.
Julie, Julie, you FLOTUS foolie,
How does your garden grow?
With ordinance shits, and elected twits,
And petty apparatchiks all in a row.
Where do we contribute to her legal defense fund? Although, it kind of sounds like there will be no need as soon as Jack McCoy sees the paperwork.
You know who else "just needed to see the paperwork"?
You want to see some real "mama grizzly" action?
Threaten the dogs.
At what point does she sue the city for harassment? when they start citing her for breathing too loud?
What’s next, has anyone checked her mattress for that little tag. This lady seems like an Anarchist to me.
Have you ever read one of those tags? The tobacco industry, the airline industry, the gambling industry, the liquor industry, the financial industry all claim to be "the most regulated" in the US.
Well, I actually did read that sucker, and my vote goes to the pillow industry.
He said, "watcha in for, kid?"
I said, "growing a vegetable garden without a license"
And they all moved away from on the Group W bench until I said, "and keeping undocumented dogs". And they all came back and we had a great time smoking cigarettes…
…come right in, it's around the back…
…just a half a mile from the railroad track.
by the way…thanks. That song is in my head…which is infinitely better then the insipid "Contemporary Christian" music my co-worker plays.
Here's some Billy Connolly on the theme of Christian pop music.
Play it loud.
Mother stabbin! Father rapin!
ANKOR PUPEEZ, SHEEPLES, THAYR ANKER PUPEAS!11!!!!
Anchor puppies!!!!
Commenter mind meld?
Get out of my brain!!!!!!!
PUPPY LIBEL!!!
Obvs union thug members of BACORN and THE BLACK PUPPIES!
You said BACORN. The spirit of my dead black lab upfists you.
Lumberg said the City Council and the mayor could change the ordinance that drove the issue from a suburban front yard to one that went all over the nation. It reads: "All unpaved portions of the site shall be planted with grass, ground cover, shrubbery, or other suitable live plant material."
"Suitable live plant material" clearly excludes things like tomatoes and radishes and other stuff that some socialist encouraged us to grow for our health as part of some devious plan to destroy our high-fructose corn syrup-based economy.
Bitch was running a job-killing operation from her home–she had to be put down.
I've been hiding a rhubarb plant behind a brick column on my front porch all summer, just waiting for the man to come along and write me up.
(Seriously, living in a subdivision with covenants leads one to some crazy shit.)
This is why I live on the edge of the working class white trash neighborhood. Don't feel like dropping 5k on a full paint job . . . it will wait.
wait until Monsanto hears about this! they will send their men out to take samples looking for patented genes
I hate, hate, hate Monsanto.
That may sound funny, but it's not.
So, any of the neighbors who have, say, an area of decorative (and expensive) rock are in the same big trouble, right?
Herman Cain sez cities can prohibit gardens, because of Sharia.
Does she enjoy her vegetable (garden) as much as Kortney?
Her neighbors could use some of Kortney's vegetables…
Mitt weighs in: "Who let the dogs out? Woof, woof, woof-woof." (I apologize to all commentators and passers-by for this eminently down-fistable comment).
That's my favorite Mitt Moment(tm).
Isn't a dog license like a tax on having a dog? Shouldn't the teabaggers jump all over this and tell the government to get out of this lady's canines? Seems like it'd be right up there with on the priority list with the return of incandescent light bulbs.
The dogs are endorsing creeping Sharia and planning on building a mosk. Expect Pam Geller and her hoards to descend upon sleepy little Oak Park.
It's ok to plant Creeping Sharia, but it is a little late in the season for that part of the country.
Steverino247
President
Creeping Sharia Horticultural Society
what about Wandering Jew?
You just can't plant them too close to each other…
I would suggest consulting: The Protocols for the Planting of the Annuals of Zion for that answer.
i'll just get my Golem/Assistant, Emmett, to read it and give me the synopsis.
This sounds like one of the unfortunate Michigan cities that had the bad form to go bankrupt and is now being ruled by a corporate Overlord. Dogs or vegetable garden — sadder than Sophie's Choice.
And you would be right. Which begs the question, if they're so hard up for money, why are they shelling out these precious shekels to harass one particular citizen?
Well, they couldn't get Al Capone on the racketeering and other illegal shit he did, so they went with the tax evasion. Same deal.
Do those dogs have birth certificates? Hmmm??
"suitable live plant material."
Well, I certainly can think of a very suitable live plant material that she should plant. For medicinal purposes, only, of course. That Glaucoma isn't going to cure itself, you know.
Oh for Christ sakes…..Taking it to trial? Take it to fucking Judge Wapner and stop cloging up the courts. Or is like there are no other crimes perpetrated in Detroit.
Yes. Privatize busybody bullshit, FOR FREEDOM!
Have her "Face the Wheel" like Mad Max!
This is one of the few crimes in Detroit where anyone has (officially) seen anything.
Well, some crimes are easier to prosecute than others….
Good to know that in a state going rapidly into the financial shitter public funds are being used to curb this serious crime wave.
Eugene Lumberg, city prosecutor,
Lumberg!!?!, You fucked Lumberg?!1!?
I got your TPS reports right here.
It was the wrong Lumberg
"You can just go ahead and move a little bit to the left. Yeah, that's it. Great. "
Thank goodness someone is finally being tough on crime. It may seem like an innocent little vegetable garden with two adorable puppies running around now, but the next thing you know Julie Bass will build a mosque on her front yard and make her doggies wear burqas, because of Sharia Law.
Dogs are the best pets. All kinds of good things happen when you have dogs.
A pit bull named "Cocaine?" I'm sure she'll be missed sorely by her litter-mate "Unbridled Aggression."
As an owner of pit bulls, I can only say that anyone that names their dog "Cocaine", is a stupid shit. These are the people that can't understand why the police and a hazmat team show up at their house to investigate the stench of ammonia coming from their garage.
I named my black lab "Paxil." He's an effective antidepressant.
Named after Cokie Roberts
Better than a gun, my brother the MP dog-handler says. Dogs never miss!
When dogs are outlawed, yadda, yadda, yadda.
Though actually, I think it would be more of an issue with cats. I guy I knew in school served on the city council in our home town. He did ok until, out of a misguided sense of "fairness," he proposed that cats had to wear license tags at all times just like dogs did. He was voted out at the next election. I should send him an "I'm pro-cat and I vote" bumper sticker.
I propose a law that cats can do whatever they damn well please. Of course, if it's mandatory, they'll probably stop doing that too.
I can see the need for vaccinations, and my dogs have them. Microchips, too. But licenses? What, do they drive her down to the store?
Hey, BalderT, did your dog ever come back after the porcupine incident?
If the Detroit Metro area has one problem, it's people spending too much time keeping up their front lawns.
Note that the ordinance says "All unpaved portions of the site shall be planted with grass, ground cover, shrubbery, or other suitable live plant material." So marijuana/grass is ok.
It must be hard to raise vegetarian dogs.
From the lady's inevitable blog…
my husband and i met this afternoon with a woman who will be running for mayor (against incumbent gerald naftaly) in oak park, michigan…unlike the current oak park officials, who won’t even return phone calls, she got right back to us http://oakparkhatesveggies.wordpress.com/
Hang in there, pups!
Bitches be trippin'.
Isn't this sort of tyrannical provincialism more commonly found in stuck-up, well-to-do communities, rather than…wherever this place is?
This is SO typical of city government. Crackheads roam the street stealing whatever isn't nailed down, but somebody on the city council has a hard-on for this gal so this is where the money gets spent: using the courts to critique landscape ascetics and making sure Lady the cocker spaniel gets sent to a "scared straight" program.
America, you are great, but you are teh lame a lot of the time.
pretty soon they will be mandating GMO blue grass so all of us will be forced to spray Roundup ™ everyday. the whole nation will be sprayed with Roundup until all plants become immune to it.
Well, there's this this alternative
I hate lawns. Lawns are botanically insane.
Crusty Jugglers!!!
Government Official: "Papers, please?" Undocumented Canine: "Woof?" Official: "I will not ask you again, "PAPERS, PLEASE!" So fucking sad….
I am assuming these were brown dogs.
I remember living in Detroit. I remember Devil's Night a.k.a. Urban Renewal Night. Things must be perfectly Leave It To Beaver there now if they are worried about this pointless shit.
OMG, who is pulling the strings to jerk this poor lady around? Two unlicensed dogs my ass! Pay your overdue parking tickets folks – the city is desperate for monies and looking at you.
I'm lucky. My neighbor is wonderful. He has apologized for mowing and weed whacking my yard because "I start to mowing, and just don't know when to stop." So he mows on both sides and across the street.
I asked him nicely in the winter if he could please not drive over my plow bump at the end of the driveway as it made it difficult for me to shovel. He apologized and asked if it would be okay if he dropped the plow and took out the plow bump? And plowed the rest of my driveway while he was at it?
You plow me out for free, or I can pay someone $30 every time mother nature drops off another installment of our annual 250" of snow. Lemme think… Well, okay, I'll let you plow my driveway for free.
His house has been covered with aluminum-backed insulation for 8-10 years. The sun reflecting off of it makes me think the sun is coming up in the west and the east on particularly confused mornings. My biggest fear is that he will get the house sided one day and then sell it! Eek!
Growing vegetables is your number one un-American activity, right there. Something needs to be done.
EPIPHANY TIME:
Old white people used to go to Arizona to die. This is why Arizona has a reputation for being a state full of insane senile racists.
But now, America's population of white people is aging, as they don't teach their kids anything except how to be dumb slobs who blame everyone else for their problems. These fat, disgusting young racists are too poor and stupid to keep their children alive.
ABut now this shitty economy won't let all of these cantankerouse olds crawl under a rock in Arizona to die. Meaning they have to get their mean on "back home." Like, this place in Michigan.
There is always hope, though, and right now the hope for an America which loves its neighbors, all of them, the ones who garden and the ones who have melanin. That hope is that soon these white olds will die, freeing us of the prickly gerentocracy paletopia that threatens to expand beyond Arizona and engulf up all.
U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!
This whole issue is strange. Oak Park is about half-Jewish, half-black (in fact, the mayor and half the council is Jewish, the other half is black), votes Democrat like crazy, and is an older, inner-ring suburb of Detroit. For whatever reason, though, this issue has brought out a kind of WASPY, out-burb, neighborhood association evil in the town.
Looks like it's time to change the mayor out. He's been there too long, anyway. Though the city is one with a manager, the current mayor has been on council since 1977, and been mayor since 1991, so he essentially rules the city.
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