According to Herman Cain’s latest terrorismism reports from Tennessee, he can safely tell us that whatever the Mooslims over there are up to these days, it is “not innocent.” Tennessee is practically Afghanistan, is how bad things have gotten, which means that it is full of poor, mostly illiterate people ruled by intolerant religious fanatics and opium meth addiction. So because of this, the jihadists hiding out there want to build another mosque, a request legally known as “rape of the First Amendment,” because free exercise of religion is magically its total opposite whenever a Muslim practices it.
What exactly is it that the terrorists want? A mosque, they just want to build a mosque, known in English as a “church.” For worshipping, on their own, their own religion, which is unlike running for office and trying to write legislation in a number of ways. Herman Cain can’t tell those ways apart.
Here he is blathering incoherently on Chris Wallace’s Fox News Sunday morning show:
“Our Constitution guarantees separation of church and state,” Cain explained. “Islam combines church and state. They are using the church part of our First Amendment to infuse their mosque in that community and people in the community do not like it, they disagree with it. Sharia law is what they are trying to infuse… What I am saying is American laws in American courts.”
“Couldn’t any community then say we don’t want a mosque in our community?” Wallace asked.
“They could say that,” Cain admitted. “They are objecting to the fact that Islam is both a religion and set of laws, Sharia law. That is the difference between any one of our other traditional religions where it’s just about religious purposes. The people in the community know best. I happen to side with the people in the community.”
Yes, silly Islam with all its “laws,” they should just have something more like the Bible, that book about dinosaurs. [RawStory]
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Nice to know he's been dipping into the Crazy bread again. Hermie, you are what you eat!
Don't you sleep?
Sleeping is for wussies. Seriously, I detest sleeping. It would be the one thing I would eliminate from life if given the chance.
I'd pick root canals, particularly in the lower teeth.
Then is your avatar dead?
That's napping – completely different. Humans sleep at night. Since cats nap, they are able to stay awake all night and make mysterious noises, causing said humans to have to investigate. Bonus points if you can get one to step barefoot in a hairball in the dark.
"What I am saying is American laws in American courts.”
He forgot to add, "With a giant stone set of the Ten Commandments in front of the courthouse."
That Decalogue came from ISRAEL! FOREIGN LAWS!
Yeah, but because of plate tectonics and continental drift (which scientists at the Institute for Creation Research have just proved to have ocurred over a period of a few thousand years) the Ten Commandments were actually handed to Moses on land that is is currently in America (present day Alaska or Minnessotta depending on whether you ask Sarah Palin or Michelle Bachmann's pastor).
Yes! I actually read about this on a set of golden tablets I keep in my magic hat. I'll read them to you sometime, but don't be surprised if they change from one telling to another. They do that, magically.
Just ask any of your eleven wives. They will tell you this is true, mostly because they know you will veto their entrance into paradise if they don't.
Plate tectonics and continental drift? What are you, some kind of heathen godless science-believer? God created the world mostly as it is, then the great flood of genocide this benevolent being sent to murder all of humanity except one family changed the face of the Earth, and that's it!
Ah, Sorosbot, you fail to appreciate the lengths to which creotards will go in shoehorning elements of mainstream science into their young-earth lunacy. There are indeed quite a few creationists who think the movement of continents into their current positions all happened during the Flood. Here's a sample:
The model also provides a mechanism for retreat of the flood waters. Psalm 104:6-7 describes the abating of the waters which had stood above the mountains. Verse 8 most naturally translates as, “The mountains rose up; the valleys sank down,” implying that vertical earth movements were the dominant tectonic forces operating at the close of the flood, in contrast to the horizontal forces dominant during the spreading phase.
Plate collisions would have pushed up mountains, while cooling of the new ocean floor would have increased its density, causing it to sink and thus deepen the new ocean basins to receive the retreating flood waters. It may be significant, therefore, that the “mountains of Ararat” (Genesis 8:4), the resting place of the ark after the 150th day of the flood, are in a tectonically active region at what is believed to be the junction of three crustal plates.
Of course, for that to work, the continents would have had to gallop across the surface of the earth in 40 days, which I suppose is no MORE absurd than any other creationist wankery…
Well, probably more precisely, the Decalogue came from some place on Mount Sinai which is in Egypt….which is infested with Mooooooslems.
Mt. Sinai is controlled by Greek Orthodox monks, who the fundies probably wouldn't like much, either!
Well, I'm sure Israelis still the think they own it.
Not just foreign, but from a place where the church and state are combined.
It's becoming very clear that "Sharia Law" is the new "gay marriage", because they have just about lost that battle.
Damn Creeping Sharia! Even if you dig that stuff up by the roots, it drops little seeds that can grow without you even knowing it. If I found it in my garden, I'd be on my hands and knees all weekend!
Where does Canonical law fall in this debate? Fucking retards.
I got yer cannon right here, ya dirty Mooslim.
Take it for granted that the kinds of fundies who are anti-Muslim have been anti-Catholic all along!
Thank Gawd, that no one has tried to infuse Xtianity into our laws.
Word. Something about pots and kettles?
I've always wondered, what about the other 603 commandments? And when will the fundies start circumcizing their hearts?
Try the new "Post-Freedom" Pizza, topped with scraps of the US Bill of Rights!! It's delicious!
It's nice to see that the Republic Party found a new standard-bearer crazy black guy to take over for Alan Keyes.
And he'll have about as much success running against Bammerz as Keyes did in IL.
If fear for our Republic, with these Republics in charge.
Detached hemorrhoid Herman Cain can shove the 10 commandments up his ass. He makes about as much sense as Basil Marceaux, but without the larfs. Why does anybody (other than Fux) put this asshole on the teevee?
So they can "prove" they're not racist while mowing down the brown peoples.
Basil Marceaux- the mime's noisy son?
This here fellow is what you call a jabbering moron. Some say that as a black man, he planned this, as a means to show the world that a black man can be racist too, establish his racist cred, so to speak, so that white racists, I mean republicans, will accept him, but he is plainly to stupid too have actually planned this. Nope, this is just a jabbering fool.
Nice analysis there.
I calls it like I sees it. This Cain, he reminded me of Chappelle's black KKK member character.
white power!
that is one of the funniest things i've ever seen
Clayton Bigsby still cracks me up.
Sounds like Herman has finally accepted the fact that he is not going to win and gone back on crazy wingnut mode.
Agreed. What the hell is in that so called sausage?
In closing, keep buying my pizza, cuz the Mooslems don't dig on the swine.
Why does Herman Cain blaspheme the Bible and hate its 10 Commandments by implying they aren't as valid as the towel-heads' Sharia law?
I agree. I think our elected officials, right on up to the Prez, invoke God and prayer entirely too much. (ANY is entirely too much).
Amen.
Oh, wait…
God will solve all the problems I've created.
– Governor Good Hair (Rick Perry)
God bless you for saying that.
Remember how Saint Ronnie of Santa Barbara used to end all his addresses with the non-specific "God bless"? God bless what? The Ku Klux Klan? The YMCA?
He probably just figured that someone in the audience sneezed.
I propose we devise a non-denominational replacement for Amen and God Bless. May I suggest….keepfuckinthatchicken…kinda rolls off the tongue.
Proving he knows nothing about the Constitution, Islam, or anything really.
Our next President of the United States everybody!
Cover that mosk in pepperoni and Hermie would get right on board.
infuse? a mosque isn't orange flavoring you jack ass.
Actually, given that Herman's thinking on how a Mosque might affect a community and how Sharia might affect U.S. Courts is basically analogous to the assumptions that underlie homeopathic medicine, "infuse" is probably exactly the word he should be using.
Does this mean that Hawaiian Halal* pizza will be outlawed?
*and yes, I know that Ham isn't even close to Halal.
Isn't the combination of meat and dairy some kind of ancient no no anyway?
It's against kosher, yes. There's a reason cheeseburgers don't sell well in Flushing, Queens.
I did not know that. Who says Wonkette isn't educational?
From the quotation " thou shalt not seethe a kid in its mother's milk", Based on that no meat and dairy products- also no poultry and dairy since the rabbis consider poultry to be included- probably from the concept "building a fence around the Torah". And this whole topic should be "don't ask, don't tell"
And Herman's "hey, look at how racist I am" Hambone act is definitely not Kosher.
"Hawaiian" pizza is as much an abomination in My eyes as the so-called "vodka Martini." I have spoken.
—Yahweh
Oh great Yahweh,
Please tell me you feel the same way about about that crappy whole wheat crust. Or those gluten-free abominations you hear about sometimes.
It is so. I have spoken. And leave something in the Poor Box, you cheapskate.
Let’s be fair Herman. Ban all the churches. Let’s start with whatever place of worship that molded your twisted view of the world. And while we're banning crap, let's burn all the cheesy Jeebus CDs out there.
I guess the fundies can always fall back to cooking Crystal Meth.
Burn the CDs? But his gospel recording was starting to get some traction!
If there's going to be any burning of CDs, I vote we start with the Pat Boone's In A Metal Mood.
"That is the difference between any one of our other traditional religions where it’s just about religious purposes"
Yes, because we all know the "traditional" religions like Christianity never try to use their religious beliefs to influence political discourse such as gay marriage, abortion rights, prayer in public schools, etc etc etc. Nope, never happens.
And of course, it was the Christian establishment that insisted on separation of church and state back in 1789, not the secular or forward-thinking members of the Constitutional Convention who recoiled in horror at the excesses of the religious conflicts in England where Catholics were forbidden from going to college, church land was taken, and non-protestants were burned at the stake. Or even here in the colonies, where Massachusetts towns banished Quakers and then cut their ears off if they came back.
That the framers intentionally applied the separation doctrine to all religions without specifying that Christianity was a favored viewpoint is well-documented too, 'cause they all discussed it for a long time. Tea partiers of course are blissfully ignorant of this.
But, but, but…we're a Christian Nation! I know this because I saw it on a sign once.
“They could say that,” Cain admitted. “They are objecting to the fact that Islam is both a religion and set of laws, Sharia law. …"
Islam could also be a refreshing new dessert on the Godfather's menu. Islam could be the feeling you feel when you wake up in the morning and you haven't yet realized that you have to pay money to an electric company, and drive to a place where you earn money to pay money, and shit like that. Islam could be your best friend coming over to drink a beer with you at sunset, and give you a hug, tell you that it's going to be all right, so that you can wake up the next morning and not commit suicide when you think about bills.
See? I can blather like an idiot too.
But such an eloquent idiot!
Makes perfect sense to me.
Weenus299/Cain 2012!
Kids come running for the rich taste of Islam!
Why aren't any of these loons going bat-shit crazy about those ultra-orthodox Jews who live in their own communities with their own police and their own LAWS? Or, the Amish?
Where is the crazy black man on Sunday TV railing against the Amish? This I want to see.
When a horse drawn four wheeled buggy is flown into a large metropolitan building.
It will happen. You just wait.
Basically my point was, I wish people would stop pandering to these racist dickheads. It's gotten to the point where I just sigh, then move on to the next absurd headline. I can barely muster the snark.
What??!
"Zebediah Determined To Buggy Inside The U.S." is just a historical document, right?
Eric Cantor (the only Jewish R Senator) is a practicing kosher Orthodox Jewish person. They have all the separate cooking bowls and sinks and everything in their kitchen, and his mother-in-law does all the cooking so that their food doesn't touch. Which I think sounds like a huge pain in the ass, BUT NOBODY CARES!!! They have FOOD LAWS!!! Michelle Obama, no, Eric Cantor, yes.
ALso, he doesn't think Jesus is anything all that special.
The only Jew Republican senator is Lieberman.
Cantor is a representative.
sorry sorry sorry you are right, of course!
Is Lieberman a U.S. Senator now? Is that what he's calling himself?
I think most folks call him that if only because most Americans do not know what the Likud party is.
What fun would that be, knowing the object of his hatred doesn't own a TV and therefore can't watch…
Silly Karen. White people aren't a threat!
Probably he would if he knew they existed.
I can tell the Republican base really doesn't take Herman Cain seriously, because they haven't even asked for his birth certificate yet.
Nice!
Yeah, but it's well-documented that he makes shitty pizza, which is a guarantor of American citizenship right there.
Is it me or does the fundie Christian obsession with Sharia & the Muslins imposing their own version of religious law on everyone else just boil down to professional jealousy?
YES. Both hate on gays, want to keep women "in their place" and want children to be dutiful little servants to their fathers.
It's like the palm reader accusing the tarot card reader down the street of fraud.
McDonald's trying to shut down Burger King for selling unhealthy food.
It's humorous. They hate Iran because they have a theocratic government, but they aren't allowed to do the same thing here.
It must grate on their nerves that the Founding Fathers saw fit to ensure that something like that can't happen in America, I think they use the Muslims and Sharia Law as a scare tactic to convince the American public to allow it, without changing the Constitution.
Hell, they've got that stupid Family Leader Pledge that they are trying to bludgeon the Republikllan candidates into signing, why not go full retard and demand that the Republiklan nominee must take on the title of "Ayatollah" or "Mullah"?
Really. These People they are hating on pray in public, to the same God, many many times a day. The American Xtians can't possibly compete. It's game over playing on a level playing field of True Faith.
Yes it does! Prots these days have given up on helping the poor, & certainly on any kind of prison ministry. So lots of poor people end up going to the competition, esp. in prison. I can't remember the title now, but some years ago I read a memoir by some big white guy who joined the (mostly black) Muslims in prison, because you had to belong to some group and they were the most reasonable. He went on to fighting Russians in Chechneya, trying to warn the CIA about Bin Laden, etc.
Someone should beat him with the fabled rule-of-thumb bread stick.
Hermie always comes through with the extra cheese.
When i feel sad and think Hopey may lose the election, along come the Republican "A" team and I am sad no more.
"Hopey!" I remember when we used to call him that. I can't decide what to call him now, but it isn't Hopey. Conciliatey?
Rope-a-Dopey?
I hopey so.
Not only does the competition look inept, but they make Hopey look like a genius.
Never forget….W – 2 terms – never did I think that guy would win in 2004, but it happened. I am constantly reminded of the stupidity of the duhMerkun population and what damage they can do when motivated.
Why are you all piling on Herman "he ain't heavy, and he ain't my brother" Cain?
I'm glad Cain is addressing the core of our economic issues. Bigotry is good.
Seriously, is hating muslins his platform? I don't hear anything else from that uncle tom.
He's the GOP's new "black friend" – see, they're not racists against "the blacks" like Trump said.
Paul Mooney would call Cain a "graham cracker." The GOP love the blacks who keep their place. What a way to get the bagger vote by hating muslims (bad sand niggers!).
Hey, pizza-selling, and pizza-buying, thats pretty much the basis of our economy. Its called the new 'service" economy. And that drives the information-based economy, we use computers and interwebs to get coupons for the pizza we buy. Its a seamless web, all based on pizza.
I agree with Hermie. There should be NO churches in any community. I mean, Ayn Rand was an atheist (a fact the tea baggers conveniently disregard) so let's just ban religion altogether. It's not like these assholes even follow the tenents of the religion the proclaim to practice.
If I say I am a Christian that will make it magically true. Actually that sums up their governing philosophy pretty well. Say it and mean it!
I give you Highland Park, Texas. Churches are prohibited by zoning law because they are so declasse.
Cut Herman some slack. The only way he can get any attention is to out crazy Bachmann.
a high bar indeed
Heard that douche nozzle, Rich Lowry say yesterday that if Rick Perry doesn't jump into the race, that it's going to be a two way battle between Michele and Mitt for the nomination.
Well, then he's already lost, poor fool. 'Cause, Bachmann cornered crazy, shot it in the face, and not triumphantly wears it's treated pelt around her neck as a trophy.
While it's refreshing to hear a Republican speak out against merging religion and state, for real refreshment Cain should try my mosque-infused vodka. I really think it's my most successful concoction since the guava, passion fruit & Rastafarian-infused rum I made a couple years back.
I made Episcopalian-infused Rye one time. It tasted like Seagrams 7. Made a great old-fashioned.
They have to start yelling bout mosks again. Look for more on health care reform and messicuns as well. Yell about anything; as long as you don't have to discuss a solution.
Cain is right. Building a mosque in Murfreesboro, TN, less than 900 miles from ground zero is the height of insensitivity. For those who don't take him seriously yet, Herman Cain has exceptional executive experience. He was a high-ranking manager at Godfathers, ran the exemplary Federal Reserve in Kansas and was chairman of Nabisco's Oreo Cookie Division.
And a big wheel down at the cracker factory.
"Nabisco's Oreo Cookie Division"
Well, he seems to be good at handling dough.
Oh, there's that big huge faith in "exceptional executive experience" again. It sure worked for Sarah Palin.
LOL…Palin's "executive experience" – as if being a mayor of some bumfuck town or half-term governor of some bum-fuck state is really "executive" experience. I've worked for middle-managers that were in charge of bigger employee populations than Snow-Snooki's constituency.
Like anyone should take pride in *management*.
I see what you did there, with the cookies. Nicely judged, as they say in Golfe.
Maybe they can get approval if they promise to sell guns.
Like it says in the Book of Peace and Love: "… thou shalt smite them, and utterly destroy them; thou shalt make no covenant with them, nor shew mercy unto them…
"But thus shalt thou deal with them: ye shall destroy their altars, and break down their images, and cut down their groves, and burn their graven images with fire."
…in Thy mercy."
Amen.
People! We are failing in our game when the actual quotes from the wingers are weirder then the posts.
Lets snap up the snark, brighten the blaspheme, ramp up the rump; whatever that means.
Ramp up the rump?
Yessssss sir!
The first amendment can say whatever you want it to when you're an illiterate Teabilly. Murfreesboro ain't exactly the intellectual capital of Tennessee, and I say that as a native Tennesseean.
Union City is where Einstein hung his hat.
I don't trust people who can't even spell "Murphy" right.
It begs to ask… is there an intellectual capital of Tennessee?
We have an ironic tribute to the Scopes monkey trial, if that counts for anything.
Wherever us Tennessee Wonketters reside.
Madison County, REPERSENTIN'!
NO WAY. I mean, bless your heart.
srsly. well, sorta. during the day, anyway. I'm a commuterepersentin', for lack of a better phrase.
for some reason, I was pegging you (NPI) to be east Tennessee-ish.
T!
How dare you impugn the stellar academic reputation of Miss Thing State University!
I've got relatives in Murfreesboro and…. yeah, you're right.
Today in circular-conserva-nonsensicum, "We have the "constitutional" legal protection to practice whatever religion in spite of what the state says, and I'm going to use that to fuck over these religious people by telling them what kind of religion they can practice."
God damn they aren't even TRYING anymore.
Well, they already have themselves convinced that Freedom of Religion does not equate to Freedom From Religion.
Yes. SIGH
What you talkin' 'bout, Wallace?
Really, for the win.
Ain't ya supposed to be calling him WILLIS?
I, for one, am grateful that religion has never influenced any laws here in US America.
Now, how many days off will the Senate get for Christmas this year?
Not to mention the no property tax thing.
The separation-of-church-and-state canard© does not apply where the Sanctity of Marriage or Levitical abominations are concerned. All those heathens with their cotton-linen blend fabrics will rue the day they violated Jah's holy Rule of Law.
And don't forget the shellfish!
And the pork rinds!
Not to mention that whole pesky adultery thing.
I think it's wonderful that the Catholic Church saw fit to give him cover. Their sense of morality, like Newt's, in entirely relative.
I guess herman is also against synagogues since Jews are supposed to follow Mosaic law.
Of course, he probably thinks Mosaic Law is about tile specifications.
Oh, if only the Founding Fathers had put some language somewhere in the Bill of Rights preventing any laws that promote an establishment of religion, thereby making this rightwing obsession with Sharia a complete non-issue and total waste of everyone's fucking time.
The Founding Fathers really fucked up by leaving that out of the Bill of Rights. Shame, really.
I am tempted to say, "Amen!"
Separation of church and state? Tell that to Rick Perry. I sure would like to play poker, drink at a bar after 2 am, buy a beer before noon on a Sunday, etc., etc., etc.,
To separate curds and whey? That's not the way of the curs.
Needs moar Abel!
As always with Cain, nobody puts stupid in a corner. . . .
Well played, Mr. Cain. Your move, Mrs. Bachmann.
Hermie's religious freak out regarding Islam once again makes the brutal point:
Everybody is somebody's nigger.
Everybody wants somebody sometime. . . .
Of course; why do you think poors in America never work together?
I'm sure Hermy has a whole raft of reasons why evangelical Christian sharia is okay.
Islamic sharia says that women can only go in to public while wearing a burka. Xtian sharia says women must stay home.
This country can also be proud of its tradition of seperation of reason from discourse.
I'm stealing the fuck out of this. Please don't be mad.
I would totally vote for Cain if his victory meant that we could outlaw any church that tried to insert itself into American politics.
I have a dream…
and super +++ to you my good man
It's nice to know that Mr. Cain sides with the "people in the community." It seems that the Muslims who live and work and worship in the area fail to meet either the "people" or "community" criteria.
Kinda reminds me of when the "people in the community" put up those "whites only" signs. And could afford a whole separate school system to keep the races apart. Because of the Bible, they said.
The way I understand it, the Constitution with its "equal protection" clauses overruled the people in the community. Thus America became Hell.
Haley Barbour's White Citizens Council kept the KKK out and voluntarily integrated blacks into their society in 1997. So don't call them racist!
Duh. They're Muslins so they must all be brown.
Why not give a speech with just fear mongering buzz words. Ladies and gentlemen,
Muslims, Sharia Law, Death Panel, Health Care Rationing, Gay Marriage, raising taxes on the rich. Thank you and good night.
That's "job creators" and don't forget "we'll be Greece in six months".
Unless you're Newt, in which case "we'll be in Greece for six months".
Hey-O!
And this is different from the current Republican practice how?
Heard the Demon Spawn, Liz Cheney, say yesterday that 1.4 trillion of spending could be cut immediately, just by repealing Obamacare.
At the next GOP debate, the moderator should ask each candidate to define sharia law and a specific example of how it's been applied in American courts.
Reality bias!
It's kinda hard to pin down due to the fact that it's "creeping".
Judges that whip out their bible to impose sentencing?
Oh, right, that's the "GOOD" kind of religious interference.
"Gotcha" journalism!
Now that would be funny: Imagine if they asked any of them anything that required an honest, non jingoistic load of shit reply. The choking sounds would be heard for miles and miles.
I don't care what these people do behind church doors, I just don't want it being paraded on the street or taught to my kids or given any special rights.
That's what Pope Ratzi says too: just leave us alone and everything'll be fine. Now, send me a few altar boys.
Oh, thanks, I forgot to add, 'but, I do care what the church is doing behind my kids.'
…or to my kids behinds.
Bennie the Rat – head of one of the most corrupt global corporations evah.
Dear Herman,
Here is a better way to pander to the baggers:
Free triple cheese, 3 meats pizza with a cheese stuffed crust and ranch dressing dipping sauce, delivered, for all.
love,
Sfn
I always preferred 2 Triple Cheese, Side Order of Fries…
With a guarantee it will not be delivered by a Muslin.
Oh, Herman, your fight isn't really with Barack Obama, it's with Muhammad Ali. Good luck, sucker.
I'm so glad that Mr. Cain thinks so little of his Constitution, that he's blindly ignoring it thanks to his (much larger) fear of Sharia.
If there was any better way to painlessly explain how enlightened our founding fathers were about removing religion from government affairs, I'd be hard-pressed to find one.
Lol.
Somewhere inside (deep, deep inside), I kinda hope jackholes like this recognize the horrible, horrible irony of their statements and say them for the lulz.
But, nah. Probably not.
Only in America!
Just to stir the crazy pot a little bit, I'm going to send him a ham shaped like the ten commandments and then tell him to hurl it at the mosque.
Mmmmmmmmm sacrilicious.
"The people in the community know best. I happen to side with the people in the community.”
Meanwhile, people in the community:
Betty Walker Shoots At Puppy (named Cocaine) Instead Kills Husband, Robert Walker In Mississippi: Police
Poor little Cocaine. Thank the Lord he's okay.
Herman's right! Can you imagine the horror when America is under Sharia Law and we can't get our cheese-stuffed crust pizzas with ham and sausage topping anymore??
"Islam is both a religion and set of laws". This makes it completely different from Christianity and Judaism, for true.
I guessing Herman didn’t spend a lot of time in his high school debating team. His argument is specious at best, all one would need do to show this is ask him his feelings about posting the Ten Commandments in a court room.
This is also what I hate about the town I live near, allowing more churches and synagogues than actual houses of worship, brothels.
Herman Cain should maybe smoke a little dope to soften his hate.
Well, that's a pleasant story.
I despise 99.9% of all religions but who could argue that the average Tennessian, male and female, would not look 5000% better in a full burqua?
Harsh. And I lost five pounds hiking this weekend.
SOME OF US ARE TRYING, THANK YOU
Because it's not like Catholics or Jews have religious laws–oh wait, they do. But they are "bad" religions, too, so who cares.
Hey Cain. Hold the anchovies.
" Tennessee is practically Afghanistan, is how bad things have gotten.."
Let's see here.
Is Tennessee mountainous and landlocked? Check.
Poor schools and general lack of education for all? Check.
Poor economy that needs a serious boost? Check.
History of violence, armed citizens, etc.? Check.
Reactionary religious folks running around telling everybody else what to do? Check.
Very serious drug problem with disasterous effects on society? Check.
I've just got to go along with you on this one.
Afghans are skinny and fit; Tennesseeans?
Z: You got me. I've never seen a photo of a fat Afghan.
Reminds me of the English pilgrims. Almost as soon as they arrived in Mass for "religious freedom", they began to persecute Catholics, Quakers and Baptists, who all ran down to Tennessee..
Where is that damn quote? I remember reading a quote from a letter (one of the Mathers maybe?) imploring a ship's captain to intercept Quakers coming to the New World and then suggesting that selling them in the slave markets would be a good outcome.
Why do I get "dictator for life" vibes from Mr Cain?
Cause you're a racist?
You read my t-shirt!
I upfisted your comment, for the record, so obviously I can't be a racist. So there. But I really meant it by all his comments that he's the final arbitrator on what the law is, regardless of what the facts are.
Snark alert, All understood.
My comment intended to convey that I believe Mr. Cain would say any criticism of him is racist, no matter how reality based, but "We want our country back" is just good American's expressing their opinions.
"Don't bother me with mere facts, my mind is made up."
“Our Constitution guarantees separation of church and state,” Cain explained.
And Cain just lost the teabagger vote.
And Xtine O'Donnell.
Any chance of us separating church and hate?
Let me check the records . . . . . . .. . .
I only went back 5,000 years, but so far the answer is, with a couple of minor exceptions, no.
We used to ride up to Murph-Town from Fort Campbell on weekends. Hunting was good, but you had to catch 'em young, before they started losing their teeth and plumping up; you know, around l6-17 (which is legal in Tennessee, and Georgia, and Alabama, etc.etc.). Oh, and Herman Cain is nucking futs, and dumb as a box of rocks.
Well, I guess all we have to do for his base to turn on him is find any evidence of a Muslim working at Godfather's Pizza.
Cain is just trying to lock up the Klan vote.
One is almost nostalgic for the Bush years, when conservatives hoped to attract Arab-Americans and Hispanic-Americans into a big tent of homophobia, among other "family values". But despite the fairly obvious political upside, the good Christian Republicans couldn't overcome their revulsion at those people, so the marriage never took place.
The fallback is to try to engineer some kind of fundie-liberal alliance of convenience, over the undeniable cultural conservatism of many Muslims. But that's pretty 2002; I'm not the biggest fan of the Dawkins/Hitchens/Harris tendency, but I don't see them or their followers being obtuse enough to enlist in a culture war regiment led by Rick Santorum, Michele Bachmann, or Herman Cain. Not in 2012.
Always the dilemma with a Republican presidential candidate: Is he/she really dumb enough to believe that, or just doing the old "Joseph Goebbels" thing?
You have to admit, the guy's living up to his destiny to end up an asterisk on a footnote within a parenthetical phrase of a chronological addendum.
A misery wrapped in an enema.
I love to infuse extra virgin olive oil (only one virgin) with a mosque, some fresh garlic and lemon rind. Delicious on atrichokes!
Roman Catholic Church = Right to Life = trying to impose ecclesiastical law on the nation. Out you go, Sisters of Perpetual Motion.
Just got back from a family reunion in Tennessee. I guess they are still going through Post-Kudzu Syndrome, the conditioned belief that anything foreign with a funny name will eventually get all over anything that ain't moving. Do YOU want to come home one day and find Sharia all over the barn and molesting your teenage daughter from head to toe?!
I also note with amusement that the TV at our motel powered on to FOX News, and no matter which channel you watched last, when you turned on the TV again, you got FOX News. What was marked on-screen as the local PBS station was only snow and a nasty burst of static three times as loud as the other stations, also.
In Chinese medicine, kudzu is used for treating alcoholism; it reduces cravings, they say. Could be useful lots of places!
I once stayed at a motel in West Memphis, Arkansas, just across the river from Memphis. The TV was chained to the wall.
Dude is gettin' cray-cray y'all.
I'll bet Herman Cain hates black pepper, too.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ip_gVSl46xI
I go back and forth between seeing this lunatic as the GOP's new minstrel act (like Steele but off-meds) and wondering when he'll just cold bare hands-kill a Muslim on stage.
And just sometimes, ya get what ya need.
"Catholicism is both a religion and set of laws, Canon law. That is the difference between any one of our other traditional religions where it’s just about religious purposes. The people in the community don't want Romish influence in their community, and I stand with them."
Exactly!! If we had a Romish president, would he be loyal to the Constitution, to the Pope, or to having the Secret Service sneak fresh strange into the White House every other night and mum's the word to Jackie?!
This man simply must be the GOP's nominee. And in a subversive subversion of the commonly subverted paradigm, he will choose Michele Bachmann as his running mate, win the election, and make Sarah Palin his Secretary of State. The he will place a few of his greying pubic hairs on both Bachmann's lunch pretzels as well as Palin's mooseburger roll and then surprise them both one day by coming to work with his pants down around his ankles. Film at eleven.
I'm going to start spelling sharia as şħąřïǎ, to make it look extra scary.
I'm so GLAD that Islam is the only religion that bases laws on its religious teachings and that the teabaggers' and conservatives' positions on things like abortion and gay marriage and birth control and prayer in schools and biology/evolution and what should be taught in schools and our country's international policies and relationships with other countries are based on sheer stupidity instead of their religious "ideas."
Wouldn't it benefit more Americans to put in place laws forbidding the opening of restaurants that sell really shitty pizza?
The Bible isn't about laws? Funny how right-wing Christianists love to quote the Laws of Moses (particularly Leviticus 18:22-23) when it comes to arguing why homosexuality is wrong.
Christian Dominionists have been combining church and state for centuries. Can we ban their churches please?
Can't this idiot stick to talking about things he knows about, like bad Gospel music and shitty pizza?
the only question this idiot should be asking is whether or not I want extra cheese with that crappy pizza
As the first amendment/commandment says, you shall have no other god but a crazy black man.
Hey, where's your brother Abel, buddy? That's what I want to know. Hey? Hey?
Politics and religion are NOT TO BE CONSIDERED ALIKE. WAke up and read your lessons!
So Herman Cain thinks he can get the Klan / Bircher vote. That's one First Class delusion he's got there.
Yeah, and Herman Cain can fuck off for all I care. These fuckers are irony-resistant, it seems. A black man saying that the Constitution doesn't protect a Muslim's right to practice his or her religion in a house of worship? Yeah, fuck off. If the Christians get to practice their crazy shit, it's only fair (and it's only legal, most important) that the Muslims get to practice their wacky shit, too.
Suck my salty, chocolate balls, Herr Cain.
Kirsten, my dear, the PC term is "Jesus-horses". Dinosaurs is the pagan/science word.
Ha ha, him too! What a nuanced and sophisticated entertainer ol’ Red was. Didja know he used to collect and paint pictures of sad clowns? How poignant is that?
What the hell is this, the Sammy Maudlin Show?!
….or creepy
I wonder if Michele Bachmann collects sad clown pictures in honor of her hero John Wayne Gacy?
Isn't her whole being kind of a sad clown homage?
And how ‘bout that Perry Como…that guy could craft a tune, huh? Hot-ziggety dog-diggety!
HA HA! I want to bear your children!!
Oh god no. I get nosebleeds if I cross the Tennessee River. We've been in Memphis for about a million years before recently decamping to The State That Skinny Forgot.
God Memphis is the worst. I fled to the far side of the state a decade ago and never looked back. Knoxville may be full of inbred morons, but at least its a purty view
Wow. My cats must be *rich* in bonus points by now.
I am not sure how one would milk a chicken, but I wouldn't drink what you got out of one.
You know, I'm originally from Detroit, whose race relations feel like they aren't past the 1960's, at times. But, I've passed through Memphis a few times, and have kept sporadic note of its modern municipal politics, and their race relations feel like they are from the fucking 1860's. Mix that in with the humidity and mosquitos and I can't imagine a more miserable place. It may be in Tennessee, but it might as well be North Mississippi, at times.
A great place to visit, and I really mean that, but that's about it.
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