The White House is a Bummer So Kumar Is Leaving Again

by Blair Burke

Working at the White House is such a drag right now, for all the hip young people, because everything is terrible and there is no Hope, Change, etc. That guy from the White Castle movies has decided (again) that he would rather be on CBS than get paid $41,000 a year to be depressed, because obviously.

Kal Penn is saying goodbye to the White House once again. This time, the actor will give up his gig in the Obama administration for a role on the CBS sitcom “How I Met Your Mother.”

Will the White House door keep revolving for Penn? That’s not clear, but he’ll leave this month with his co-workers’ best wishes. White House spokesman Shin Inouye said Thursday, “We deeply appreciate his service and wish him the best in his future endeavors.”


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pinkocommi July 14, 2011 at 9:16 pm

As Kumar already has escaped from Guantanamo, the White House cannot hold him.

V572 der Plaatz July 14, 2011 at 9:50 pm

That was the stupidest movie ever to have such a great title.

Sue4466 July 15, 2011 at 7:55 am

I see your Guantanamo movie and raise you Snakes on a Plane.

Sam Jackson. Simple idea. Great title. Totally fucked it up.

horsedreamer_1 July 15, 2011 at 9:38 am

Don't Be a Menace to South Central Whilst Drinking Your Juice in the Hood, anyone?

Super-soakers & bunny-slippers FTW.

Arken July 14, 2011 at 9:21 pm

I smell a hallucination cameo ratings booster for House!

AJWjr. July 14, 2011 at 9:24 pm

See, he never should've killed himself off from House MD.

KeepFnThatChicken July 15, 2011 at 9:43 am

Wrong. Soon after, House humped the shark fucked Cuddy.

ingloriousbytch July 15, 2011 at 10:12 am

Disagree. Kutner was smart to kill himself. It's like he saw what the show was about to turn into.

nounverb911 July 14, 2011 at 9:25 pm

He's quit more times than Sarah Palin.

Crank_Tango July 14, 2011 at 9:38 pm

Brown Libel!

father_moray July 15, 2011 at 2:28 pm

Makes a lot of sense…u smoke weed, too?

father_moray July 15, 2011 at 2:28 pm

Do you see it…growing on the horizon? It comes for democrats like Kortney just to my right.

nounverb911 July 14, 2011 at 9:27 pm

Coming soon: Harold and Kumar Go To Wassilla?

HistoriCat July 15, 2011 at 9:35 am

Please – no suggestions of three-ways with any of the Palins.

JustPixelz July 15, 2011 at 10:43 am

Already been done, as portrayed in the documentary "Who's Nailin' Paylin."

hagajim July 15, 2011 at 11:04 am

I thought Letterman was nailin Palin.

nmmagyar July 15, 2011 at 11:53 am

I could handle a porn with Todd & Track

DahBoner July 15, 2011 at 3:33 pm

"Harold and Kumar Go To Wassilla?"


They given up weed and are looking for some crystal meth?

mourningnmerica July 16, 2011 at 1:45 am

The White House DOES look like a big white castle. He was simply escaping.

orygoon July 14, 2011 at 9:32 pm

There are people at my house who would get a real lift from being paid $41,000/year to be depressed.

Biel_ze_Bubba July 14, 2011 at 10:46 pm

Yeah — millions of Americans are doing it for free.

Crank_Tango July 14, 2011 at 9:38 pm

wow, what's next? biden takes that greeter job at walmart he has been thinking about? then again, in wilmington, the greeters face inward, if you know what I mean.

arihaya July 14, 2011 at 9:42 pm

nah,,, Biden will either open an Auto detailing shop or be an Amtrak tour guide

ChessieNefercat July 16, 2011 at 4:03 pm

Aw, I can picture the Joester being real excited about being an Amtrak tour guide with his engineer's hat and all. And passengers hurtling through the windows, too. I like Joe.

the_problem_child July 14, 2011 at 9:59 pm

Hell, I didn't know he was BACK in the White House.

smokefilleddoommate July 14, 2011 at 10:04 pm

Does anyone even watch that stupid-ass show?

Biel_ze_Bubba July 14, 2011 at 10:47 pm

What show is that?

smokefilleddoommate July 15, 2011 at 12:44 am


GOPCrusher July 15, 2011 at 2:46 pm

Friends II

iburl July 14, 2011 at 10:07 pm

And what exactly did Kumar do for the White House as "an associate director in the Office of Public Engagement"? Provide stoner cachet? Was he hired because they needed a south asian and Sanjay Gupta laughed along with the rest of us at his being named Surgeon General? Maybe he was a debt ceiling negotiator?

Biel_ze_Bubba July 14, 2011 at 10:48 pm

Obama got his lulz by sending Kumar to negotiate with House Repukes. (No wonder he was depressed.)

Hurricane Ali July 14, 2011 at 10:58 pm

I heard Kumar wanted a leave of absence to film "Wrath of Khan 2: Electric Boogaloo" and Obama was all like, "nah, man, that's too racist against the muslims," and Kumar was all like, "why you always up in my grill, man?" and then he left the room in a huff, saying "I'm taking it to the streets, yo." And that's what happened.

fuflans July 15, 2011 at 1:04 am

ah so good. wish i could give you more 'p's'

Hurricane Ali July 15, 2011 at 7:02 am

Thank you!

Andrew Drinker July 15, 2011 at 8:32 am

You make it sound like he was an understudy for Eric Cantor.

Hurricane Ali July 15, 2011 at 10:19 am

Or Obama, according to Eric Cantor.

rambone July 14, 2011 at 11:00 pm

kalpenn . . . shininouye . . .

WTF is this? A menu at some ethnic restaurant? Well, there better be anus burger in it, whatever it is . . .

BarackMyWorld July 14, 2011 at 11:14 pm

At least now he has more time (and money) to go to White Castle.

JoshuaNorton July 14, 2011 at 11:16 pm

There's probably a part available on "Two and a Half Men", if this one doesn't pan out.

horsedreamer_1 July 15, 2011 at 8:50 am

It will take at least one Kutcher & one Penn* to win as much as Sheen.

*Jillette, sit you Libertard behind down. & don't even think of it, Badgeley!

user-of-owls July 14, 2011 at 11:41 pm

Kal sera, sera;
whatever Inouye, will Inouye

flamingpdog July 15, 2011 at 12:27 am

“We deeply appreciate his service and wish him the best in his future endeavors.”

I've been in gubmint service for over 31 years now, and I'm pretty sure that that message translated into English is, "Fuck off and die, loser prick."

emmelemm July 15, 2011 at 2:57 am

That was about what I got out of it, too.

fuflans July 15, 2011 at 1:06 am

i have to say, weird hollywood / DC mash up stories elict the best damn wonkette comments.

father_moray July 15, 2011 at 2:24 pm

yea, cool, huh?!? What country is this again?

gurukalehuru July 15, 2011 at 2:04 am

Unless they start with the ghosts or time travel cop-outs which, seriously, would not surprise me, he can't go back to House.

father_moray July 15, 2011 at 2:25 pm

That makes sense…pothead, yes?

Negropolis July 15, 2011 at 3:26 am

I tell you this, you can buy a shitload of Sliders for $41 thousand smackaroos. Speaking of Sliders, anyone remember the television series Sliders.

Yes, I'll tell anyone within earshot, this is how my mind works, this is how I roll. It's like a game of Atari Pong up in this cabeza.

HistoriCat July 15, 2011 at 9:39 am

Oh Sliders – what a fun show. For about two and a quarter seasons. And thank YOU David Peckinpah for being a complete hack and destroying the show.

bikerlaureate July 15, 2011 at 11:40 am

Wow, you hung in there twice as long as I did. And the premise had infinite possibilities…!

I blamed Tracy Tormé for years. Unfairly, it seems.

BarryOPotter July 15, 2011 at 12:23 pm

Tracy Tormé? Wasn't he that singer, they one they called the Velvet Fog that had that show about a plane crash on some island, Lord of the Flies, I think, that just confused the hell out of a lot of viewers who stopped watching it and I've run out of stuff for this sentence?

bikerlaureate July 15, 2011 at 4:58 pm

Mel actually appeared on Sliders…

HistoriCat July 15, 2011 at 12:27 pm

I think Tracy may have some brain damage from banging his head against the wall too much. Between network arbitrary dictates and producers who screwed up his creation, it must have become incredibly frustrating.

Come here a minute July 15, 2011 at 5:37 am

So sick of writing answers to letters telling Obama to grow a spine and tax the fuck out of the rich bastards destroying the country (job creators).

father_moray July 15, 2011 at 2:23 pm

Top 1% pays 90% of taxes…those bastards.

ThundercatHo July 15, 2011 at 5:38 am

Hopefully they'll throw him a bottomless goodbye party. Republicans, when they hear, will try to crash it.

ThundercatHo July 15, 2011 at 5:47 am

Thank you, come again.

(Somebody had to say it)

Oblios_Cap July 15, 2011 at 8:34 am

Say what you will, but that no-talent hack has managed to keep working ever since he started on Nicklelodeon. It's not who you know, it's who you blow. Just ask Callista.

horsedreamer_1 July 15, 2011 at 8:51 am


4TheTurnstiles July 15, 2011 at 8:58 am

Gross! Newt put his pee pee in that nice woman's MOUTH!

JustPixelz July 15, 2011 at 10:48 am

I've obviously been blowing the wrong people. Although your explanation does explain how Marcus Bachmann got that government pray-away-he-gay gig.

ttommyunger July 15, 2011 at 10:43 am

Kal who?

horsedreamer_1 July 15, 2011 at 11:01 am

-El, Nic Cage's kid?

ttommyunger July 15, 2011 at 12:01 pm

Nick Who?

flamingpdog July 18, 2011 at 12:03 am

Nick L. Odeon.

ttommyunger July 18, 2011 at 9:58 am

I deserved that.

MinAgain July 15, 2011 at 11:34 am

He's leaving again? I didn't even know he was back.

FlownOver July 15, 2011 at 12:09 pm

You know who else left the White House twice?

HistoriCat July 15, 2011 at 12:27 pm

Grover Cleveland?

phlox✔ July 15, 2011 at 12:57 pm

Mallard Fillmore?

father_moray July 15, 2011 at 2:21 pm

They all leaving after elections. Suggest de-grease.

sezme July 15, 2011 at 12:24 pm

And now it's off to Bolivia to foment a revolucíon. ¡Suerte, compañero!

inapewetrust July 15, 2011 at 12:35 pm

find your bella!

father_moray July 15, 2011 at 2:26 pm

Obama's Mom has some really … nude … pix on the web….destined for glory…so does my cat.

Crank_Tango July 15, 2011 at 2:39 pm

way to show up late for the trolling, troll.

Texan_Bulldog July 16, 2011 at 1:48 pm

What a moran…

ChessieNefercat July 16, 2011 at 4:09 pm

Doesn't he have any friends he can hang out with? Never mind.

He's a) not funny, b) not smart, c) not interesting.

sportshort July 15, 2011 at 6:10 pm

Men In Black 3 needs a Tony Shaloub-type character. It's just a rumor, though.

mrblifil July 17, 2011 at 9:49 am

It's hard to conceive of a film that doesn't need a Tony Shaloub-type character.

Texan_Bulldog July 16, 2011 at 1:24 pm

Kal is just waiting for Bobby Jindal to do something noteworthy, so he can play him on the big screen. Or does Jack McBrayer have that already locked up?

mrblifil July 17, 2011 at 9:48 am

Recurring on a popular sitcom pays a shitload more than $41K. I call affirmative action hire, plus socializms.

kenetoken July 19, 2011 at 11:15 am

Lady GaGa and the cast of Glee are going to replace him. They appeal to the same ignorant base that voted for Obama.

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