REPUBLICAN FAMILY VALUES  11:25 am July 1, 2011

Ohio GOP Lawmaker Celebrates Being Pro-Life By Driving Drunk

by Kirsten Boyd Johnson

heyyyyy you, want to make an angry fetus with me?Republican “moral math” alert! Ohio state representative Robert Mecklenborg was arrested for driving around drunk on an Indiana state highway, which is sort of an “anti-life” thing to do, you might say. But just a few days ago, he also voted for the Fetal Heartbeat Bill, one of those fake “pro-life” thingies that Republicans love. Do they cancel each other out? Mecklenborg thought so, as he failed to tell anyone at the Ohio Statehouse about his arrest.  Mecklenborg was also – hey hey! – full of Viagra and accompanied by a lady, presumably on a little super-sanctified sexytime trip to make their own angry fetus. That’s worth a few very literal “pro-life” points! So whatever, Mecklenborg is still against death on balance, why should anyone care? 

The AP reports:

According to arrest and court records, Mecklenborg was driving with a female passenger on U.S. route 50 in Dearborn County, Ind., at 2:47 a.m. April 23 when he was pulled over by an Indiana state trooper for a burned-out headlight.

Mecklenborg, who was driving a 2004 Lexus with temporary Kentucky plates, failed several sobriety tests and his blood alcohol content was registered at 0.097 percent, according to the documents. A toxicology screening also picked up Viagra and another pharmaceutical drug in his system.

Yeah, sure, whatever. No Internet was used in the committing of any of these stupid crimes, so all is forgiven. [AP]

 
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{ 158 comments }

arihaya July 1, 2011 at 11:28 am

for GOPs, your right to life is terminated the moment you leave your mother's vagina*

* unless you are a rich bastard

nounverb911 July 1, 2011 at 11:28 am

At least he didn't kill anyone. Yet.

freakishlywrong July 1, 2011 at 11:34 am

Where's a well placed oak tree when you need one?

V572 [SSAN] July 1, 2011 at 11:53 am

Thank goodness that alert state trooper was checking everyone's illumination on the highway, especially those with out-of-state plates. This guy sounds like a douche bag but it's hard to see the pertinence of the boner pills to a DUI.

LowProfileinGA July 1, 2011 at 12:08 pm

Multiplies the snark potential.

Chet Kincaid July 1, 2011 at 1:24 pm

As an abortion foe, he does not believe in the right to privacy, so…

riverside68 July 1, 2011 at 12:31 pm

"At least he didn't kill anyone."

That we know of.

SarcasticNymph July 5, 2011 at 12:34 pm

Odds are good if his ladyfriend gets pregnant, he will pay for the abortion. Also, if he is in a MVA with a pregnant lady and she loses the fetus, SHE will be held for "feticide" and imprisoned. This is the new anti-abortion tactic – imprison women for murder if they miscarry, no matter the cause. These nasty GOP white males are just nasty old douchebags.

Barb July 1, 2011 at 11:29 am

I love the photo of Elmo with the booze. We should call him Pickle Me Elmo.

nounverb911 July 1, 2011 at 11:32 am

I had pickled Elmos once at Katz's Deli.

BloviateMe July 1, 2011 at 11:39 am

Pickle me Elmo sounds kind of like a lovin' request.

PsycWench July 1, 2011 at 12:04 pm

Appropriate, since I have been driven to drink by excessive quantities of Elmo.

hagajim July 1, 2011 at 11:29 am

C'mon guys, he was just following the "Wander Indiana" motto. Didn't realize that wandering on both sides of the road while shizzfaced was inappropriate. Dick! And now Kasich has signed a bill to allow guns in bars so more non-fetii can kill one another in Ohio. Suck it downfisty troll.

horsedreamer_1 July 1, 2011 at 7:00 pm

On nitghts with tallboy specials, opening up a can will take on an whole new meaning with barroom concealed carry.

LabRodent July 1, 2011 at 11:29 am

Nothing says Pro-Life better than being Pissy Drunk with a raging hard on speeding down the Hwy. WIN

freakishlywrong July 1, 2011 at 11:30 am

I would never butt-secks, gay-abort that alt-text, Ms. Johnson.

MissusBarry July 1, 2011 at 11:30 am

Dude could've hit a preggo chick and killed the fetus (mother wouldn't matter, obvs)! Don't you know, Borgie, you have to be thinking about the welfare of potential people at all times. They're an endangered species (or so says the side of the Beverly Hillbilly Anti-abortion truck driven by a squirrelly-haired old white guy with a handicapped placard that lurks near my office).

lochnessmonster July 1, 2011 at 11:31 am

Should lose his job for being stoopid. Yes, we can write the laws, but follow them? That's for the little people.

DaRooster July 1, 2011 at 11:31 am

"We're gonna need all the lives we can get… since us Repugnants insist on driving around drunk, stealing trucks and trailers, and wiping out people with our war machine… oh and no healthcare for the poors… don't forget killing ill poor folks."

*hic*

DaSandman July 1, 2011 at 11:32 am

Big Bob was gonna ram him some life into a vagina while ripped to the tits on Amazon Boner Pills.

Yeehaw!

It was gonna be a new experience because this crowd's regular playmates usually have 4 legs.

mavenmaven July 1, 2011 at 11:32 am

Viagra and alcohol: the Red Bull and vodka of the old boy republican set?

baconzgood July 1, 2011 at 11:33 am

"don't drink alcohol in excess then vote on an anti-abortion bill while taking viagra"

-The Voice on My Tee Vee-

MissusBarry July 1, 2011 at 11:33 am

I want some video of this lightweight failing the field sobriety tests.

AJWjr. July 1, 2011 at 11:48 am

I love it when they start singing their ABC's!

user-of-owls July 1, 2011 at 11:53 am

Or try to go monopedal!

riverside68 July 1, 2011 at 12:34 pm

"I couldn't do this if I was sober."

You wouldn't believe how often that shows up in the FST results narritive.

TheMeatmaker July 2, 2011 at 3:30 am

The viagra made it hard to walk a straight line. Well, the viagra made it hard. Being a republican made the straight part difficult.

MissusBarry July 2, 2011 at 8:08 am

Well played.

tessiee July 3, 2011 at 12:34 am

I watched part of "Cops" where the guy in mullet and wifebeater fled the cops by cutting across the yards of the other trailers. The best part, though was his words:
"You'll never catch me! Never! NEVER!!"
*stumbles, falls down*
"Oh, MAN, I'm hung over."

YasserArraFeck July 1, 2011 at 11:33 am

Everyone celebrates a 4 hour boner in their own way….give the guy a break – at least he wasn't sending pics of it to all and sundry

OurHoboSenator July 1, 2011 at 11:34 am

Better yet, evidence suggests the lady with him was employed at a nearby gentleman's club…

YasserArraFeck July 1, 2011 at 11:41 am

A little private pole dancing was obviously on the menu

LesBontemps July 1, 2011 at 11:42 am


WLWT has been working to confirm reports that the woman works as a stripper at a club in Lawrenceburg. No one at the club would confirm her employment, but an employee at the club told WLWT they would pass along a message to her.

No punchline necessary.

Terry July 1, 2011 at 11:47 am

What are the odds that he'll step down from office? Given that he's a Republican, slim to none and slim just left town.

Native_of_SL_UT July 1, 2011 at 12:37 pm

I think this is code for she didn't work the stage, she worked the crowd.

Doktor Zoom July 1, 2011 at 11:55 am

Colon shut his eyes… 'I think I could do with a breath of fresh air,' he groaned.

'Oh, not yet, Sarge. Broccolee's on next. She can touch the back of her head with her foot, you know–'

'I don't believe that!' said Fred Colon.

'She can, Sarge, I've seen–'

'I don't believe there's a dancer called Broccolee!'

'Well, she did use to be called Candi, Sarge, but then she heard that broccoli is better for you–'

Tundra Grifter July 1, 2011 at 12:36 pm

According to the story, he said ""Being human, I have made a mistake…"

Not much to add to that start…

Rosie_Scenario July 1, 2011 at 12:43 pm

Gentleman's club. Gotta love the euphemisim.

V572 [SSAN] July 1, 2011 at 1:14 pm

Indeed. Considering that being a gentlemen kind of begins with forswearing such loutish behavior as going to strip clubs.

Rarian Rakista July 2, 2011 at 2:37 pm

In Portland everyone goes to strip clubs, well really more burlesque shows.

tessiee July 3, 2011 at 12:40 am

I once commented to a friend that I thought the euphemism "gentleman's club" was kinda ironic:
Me: I mean, what part of gentleman involves staring at naked strangers?
Friend: That would be the "man" part.

Jukesgrrl July 2, 2011 at 2:10 am

They were off to do a historic reenactment of the Wilbur Mills/Fanne Fox scandal. It's like a Civil War reenactment, except with a politician and a hooker instead of a Yank and a Reb. (I know, the only people who remember that are old.)

SayItWithWookies July 1, 2011 at 11:34 am

Of course he didn't tell anyone — Mr. Mecklenbourg didn't want the media circus to serve as a distraction from the real issues — like Anthony Weiner's crotch shots.

chascates July 1, 2011 at 11:35 am

And Chris Hanson of To Catch A Predator has been caught (on tape, allegedly) cheating on his wife.

Guppy06 July 1, 2011 at 12:24 pm

Not interesting, unless the homewrecker is a burly FBI agent who types like a twelve year old girl.

horsedreamer_1 July 1, 2011 at 1:23 pm

Her name is Krystyn Caddell, & she's an affiliate reporter in South Florida. I am trying to confirm if she is the daughter of certified maniac Pat Caddell (former Carter pollster, turned FOX News pundit). If so, would explain the obvious daddy issues of being 31 & hooking up with a 50 years old molo-buster.

Chet Kincaid July 1, 2011 at 1:39 pm

"So what?" to all of it.

horsedreamer_1 July 1, 2011 at 7:03 pm

I deserved that.

Pat Caddell jokes were all the rage in the late nineties, when he was a regular on Hardball, but never since then.

elviouslyqueer July 1, 2011 at 11:35 am

"Being human, I have made a mistake and this has caused great hurt to my family, and I'm deeply sorry for that. I've served tirelessly and well my constituents and I want to apologize to them as well. While the discovery process in this case goes on, I am entitled to the same presumption of innocence as any other citizen."

Enjoy prison, motherfucker.

YasserArraFeck July 1, 2011 at 11:42 am

This is one 'borg that's going to be well and truly assimilated by the boys in the Big House

LetUsBray July 2, 2011 at 6:48 pm

You have a purty mouth. Resistance is futile.

Guppy06 July 1, 2011 at 12:25 pm

A presumption of innocence doesn't protect one from unnecessary medical procedures in Ohio.

riverside68 July 1, 2011 at 12:44 pm

The presumption of innocence is a legal term used in court when considering criminal charges.

Got no relevance in public opinion, case closed:

A. douche bag
B. shit sack
C. Santorium
D. All of the above.

ThundercatHo July 1, 2011 at 1:19 pm

As if, motherfucker's a Republican rep. , maybe a fine at best.

tessiee July 3, 2011 at 12:42 am

"Being human, I have made a mistake in getting caught."

fxd

DaRooster July 1, 2011 at 11:37 am

Ohio Idiot… Kentucky plates… Illinois Highway…

…lost yet Jerk-Face? Of course you are… you're Republican.

Terry July 1, 2011 at 11:49 am

His road map is from the 1850's

JoshuaNorton July 1, 2011 at 11:38 am

Ummm. They're not so much pro "life" as they are pro "die for having sex, bitch".

Biiiig difference.

MissusBarry July 1, 2011 at 11:43 am

Bitch doesn't have to die, although it's perfectly fine and steps to avoid it are unacceptable; what's important is that bitch's life (and the life of the actually born child) is ruined. They should rename pro-life to "ruining-life"…for more apt.

tessiee July 3, 2011 at 12:46 am

If women can have sex without it ruining their lives, how are they ever going to learn?

MissusBarry July 3, 2011 at 5:17 pm

And thus I carry on with my heathen fornicating ways. To the fetus that tried to kill me and the rethugs: suck it.

Doktor Zoom July 1, 2011 at 11:39 am

Gaahhh! That one level where you're trying to crush the abortion doctors under the glass wall is driving me crazy!

SudsMcKenzie July 1, 2011 at 11:40 am

I'm more disgusted with the .097%, what a pussy.

EatsBabyDingos July 1, 2011 at 11:42 am

Indiana: "No Longer Ohio's Armpit" "Is That a Thimble in Your Pants?" "Can the Cows Watch?" "OOO, I Saw Cloris Leachman and Now My Woody is Won'ty" "No Matter What You Can't Get There From Here."

zhubajie July 1, 2011 at 10:11 pm

Indiana motto: "Show us your tits!"

LabRodent July 1, 2011 at 11:42 am

Leave Bea Arthur out of this.

JoshuaNorton July 1, 2011 at 11:43 am

"While the discovery process in this case goes on, I am entitled to the same presumption of innocence as any other citizen."

And if I ever get on your jury, I'll keep that in mind. Meanwhile, as a private citizen, we can spread the word that you're a drunk driving, drug riddled asshat with absolutely no compunctions about it.

Doktor Zoom July 1, 2011 at 11:43 am

Oh golly, the AP totally missed the money quote from another story about the incident:

The trooper who pulled over Mecklenborg also noted in his report that Mecklenborg "endangered a person."

Now, is that an actual person, or an unborn person? Because only one of those matters.

weejee July 1, 2011 at 11:43 am

MecklenBORG? Resistance is futile.

hagajim July 1, 2011 at 11:44 am

He was headed to the nearest strip club with his Viagra and his date.

KathrynSane July 1, 2011 at 11:44 am

My uterus is pointing and laughing at this asshole in sweet, sweet revenge.

user-of-owls July 1, 2011 at 12:18 pm

You can point your ute? That is genuinely more impressive than the chicken that can do math!

V572 [SSAN] July 1, 2011 at 1:16 pm

Even the Calculus?

user-of-owls July 1, 2011 at 4:34 pm

Even the….Trig!

V572 [SSAN] July 1, 2011 at 4:41 pm

Poultry have a hard time remembering their identifites, as in sin²Θ + cos²Θ = 1

tessiee July 3, 2011 at 12:48 am

^^^
^^
^
This is why I love you guys!
*wipes away a single tear*

Chet Kincaid July 1, 2011 at 1:42 pm

Is it a sport-ute?

MrFizzy July 3, 2011 at 9:14 pm

Put that thing back in its container for god's sake – it's going to dry out in this heat.

OurHoboSenator July 1, 2011 at 11:44 am

Off-topic, but while looking for the Mecklenborg link on Channel 5's website, I found this gem of a story:

Bristol Palin Knocks, Misspells Middletown In New Book: Candidate's Daughter Says Historic Hotel Had Cockroaches

Texan_Bulldog July 1, 2011 at 11:53 am

Wasilla may not have cockroaches, but I'm sure there are enough meth dealers to make up for it.

horsedreamer_1 July 1, 2011 at 1:24 pm

At least the hotel isn't infested with… HOOKWORMS!

Barrelhse July 1, 2011 at 10:55 pm

Cockroaches my ass. Those were the crabs her mother got from Florence Henderson.

gurukalehuru July 3, 2011 at 5:57 am

Bristol don't like no roaches. Cock, on the other hand…

gurukalehuru July 3, 2011 at 11:47 am

This story isn't getting anywhere near the attention it deserves. Therefore, I try to do my bit at http://www.gurukalehuru.com

edgydrifter July 1, 2011 at 11:44 am

In case there was any doubt… his passenger was apparently an exotic dancer from the Concepts Show Girls Club (classy!) who is not his wife or the mother of his as-yet acknowledged children.

kissawookiee July 1, 2011 at 2:57 pm

He wasn't cheating! It was only a conceptual girl, not a real one. Jeez.

tessiee July 3, 2011 at 12:49 am

That is the fanciest euphemism for hoowah I've heard yet.

randcoolcatdaddy July 1, 2011 at 11:47 am

"Sir! You are drunk."

"Oh yeah? Well, you're pregnant!"

"I beg your pardon."

"Yeah … tomorrow I'll be sober. And you'll still be pregnant."

comrad_darkness July 1, 2011 at 11:48 am

Maybe it was a convincing trannie…

(not that there is anything wrong with that.)

SorosBot July 1, 2011 at 11:48 am

.097? What a lightweight. And I bet the hooker was on birth control, too; hypocrite.

Barrelhse July 1, 2011 at 12:52 pm

To be fair, he hadn't had a drink for more than a week, which explains the wimpy BAC.

Doktor Zoom July 1, 2011 at 11:48 am

Actually, it's Montana legislators who are likely to be on the lambs.

Texan_Bulldog July 1, 2011 at 11:48 am

Lighten up, people. Dude was just celebrating voting on OH's 'I hate women' bill and warming up for this country's Independence Day celebration. Who doesn't celebrate happy occasions and long weekends with vodka, Viagra and a stripper? So judgmental…

zhubajie July 1, 2011 at 10:26 pm

And in Lawrenceburg, IN! Usually they go to Newport, KY!

comrad_darkness July 1, 2011 at 11:48 am

Obama clearly needs to take 150 vacation days a year like Georgie boy. Working too hard, the bastard.

axmxz July 1, 2011 at 12:29 pm

Won't someone PLEASE think of all that brush going uncleared?!

Lucidamente1 July 1, 2011 at 11:49 am

It would've been a lot funnier if he'd been driving with a shemale passenger.

riverside68 July 1, 2011 at 12:56 pm

And the reason you think he wasn't is?

(I don't think the cops checked the passinger's equipment.)

Barrelhse July 1, 2011 at 12:57 pm

Did anyone look?

Lionel[redacted]Esq July 1, 2011 at 1:22 pm

Where was Gaeten that day?

WhatTheHeck July 1, 2011 at 11:50 am

Is it any wonder that a drunk driver produces sperm which can't keep between the lines and end up breaking a few eggs along the way.
Very pro life and death.

Goonemeritus July 1, 2011 at 11:51 am

“According to arrest and court records, Mecklenborg was driving with a female passenger”

Republican involved in a drunken sexy time with a woman? This has got to be a setup.

JoshuaNorton July 1, 2011 at 11:53 am

He'll suddenly "find Jesus" in 3…2…1..

comrad_darkness July 1, 2011 at 12:05 pm

damn, you beat me to it.

Doktor Zoom July 1, 2011 at 12:26 pm

In his pants!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lionel[redacted]Esq July 1, 2011 at 12:31 pm

Jesus is his Viagra supplier?

user-of-owls July 1, 2011 at 11:55 am

Mecklenborg was also – hey hey! – full of Viagra and accompanied by a lady, presumably on a little super-sanctified sexytime trip

So what you're telling us is that he is most assuredly not pro-wife.

ttommyunger July 1, 2011 at 12:00 pm

"Burned-out headlight". Not likely on a 2004 Lexus. Hope the cop remembered to break it before the wrecker got there. Damned dashcams have spoiled the old favorite: "crossed over the center line" ruse. Anyway, good police work. This turd will get off with a slap on the wrist; prolly get reelected in the bargain but at least it will be more difficult for him to pass himself off as anything but a lying asshole from now on. Win!

ifthethunderdontgetya July 1, 2011 at 12:08 pm

This is just the kind of Government Interference in private life that the people hate.

Now when the government regulates lady parts, on the other hand, Wingnut Jebus pops a boner.
~

LouBristol July 1, 2011 at 12:09 pm

Is this one of those "I see your drunk Idaho lawmaker who stole a Ford Explorer and raise you a drunk, viagra-ed up, Ohio lawmaker with a hooker" games?

Doktor Zoom July 1, 2011 at 12:25 pm

At least the Idaho asshole managed to get himself well and truly rat-arsed, almost twice the legal limit, and committed a major act of theft in the mix. This Ohio pantywaist was very nearly sober by comparison, and driving his own vehicle, though not, apparently, with his own wife's head in his lap.

Why, yes, I am from Idaho. There is a certain amount of regional pride at stake here.

ttommyunger July 1, 2011 at 12:10 pm

He may look to Jesus to forgive and forget, but his old lady prolly ain't cut from that cloth. Hee, hee.

fuflans July 1, 2011 at 12:17 pm

today we are all drunk Mecklenborgs full of Viagra and accompanied by a lady.

Lionel[redacted]Esq July 1, 2011 at 12:27 pm

You live a better life than I.

Native_of_SL_UT July 1, 2011 at 12:46 pm

We wish.

Guppy06 July 1, 2011 at 12:20 pm

It's the best he could do with the wine coolers available.

bigdupa July 1, 2011 at 12:21 pm

At least he's not a homo.

fuflans July 1, 2011 at 12:22 pm

we are on a mission, from God. it's 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, t's dark and we're wearing sunglasses we're drunk.

tessiee July 3, 2011 at 12:57 am

Hit it!

donner_froh July 1, 2011 at 12:22 pm

Mecklenborg's statement–a second take:

"Being human, I have made a mistake I got caught and this has caused great hurt to my family, embarrassed the hell out of me and I'm deeply sorry for that," it said. "I've served tirelessly and well my constituents managed to slide by doing nothing for the idiots who elected me and I want to apologize to them as well. hope they forget about this before the next election. While the discovery process in this case goes on, I am entitled to the same presumption of innocence as any other citizen. even though I am guilty as hell"

Lionel[redacted]Esq July 1, 2011 at 12:27 pm

But did the woman have a heart beat? If so, then it is all right.

DashboardBuddha July 1, 2011 at 12:28 pm

If lost elections last more than 4 terms stop taking Viagra immediately and call your doctor.

Barrelhse July 1, 2011 at 12:32 pm

Maybe he hadn't had a drink for a few days.

prommie July 1, 2011 at 12:36 pm

Dude is totally doing it wrong. Ted Kennedy's B.A.C. was higher than that the next morning, and I say that with love and respect. Thats how you parrrr-tay. Back in the day, .09 was legal, its not even worth driving with a .09.

riverside68 July 1, 2011 at 12:36 pm

DAMM: Drunks Against Mad Mothers

Eve8Apples July 1, 2011 at 12:37 pm

It isn't safe for a fella to expose his precious sperm babies to Viagra and booze. It could prevent his sperm babies from producing a fetus heartbeat baby. Ohio must pass a law to stop men from poisoning their innocent sperm babies with pills and liquor.

LowProfileinGA July 1, 2011 at 2:29 pm

SpermBabies™
No need for thanks.

tessiee July 3, 2011 at 1:00 am

*presents tiny snack tray for SpermBabies*

DahBoner July 1, 2011 at 12:39 pm

Ohio GOP state representative drunk driving in Indiana on temporary Kentucky plates.

Diversity!!!!

comrad_darkness July 1, 2011 at 12:50 pm

"Being human, I have made a mistake "

Being a worthless douchebag, I did a worthless douchebaggy thing, which was not a mistake, it was just me being me. –Fixed

Barrelhse July 1, 2011 at 12:55 pm

In his confusion someone slipped him a Viagra, possibly the artist, being skilled at the art of Conception.

tessiee July 3, 2011 at 12:53 am

Did you see her today at the reception?

Buckminster July 1, 2011 at 12:57 pm

I love when these scheiss-for-brains teatards crash and burn. Hope he likes his cellmate Bubba.

zhubajie July 1, 2011 at 12:57 pm

All Ohio pols are like this! It's perpetual Harding administrion!

Weenus299 July 1, 2011 at 1:00 pm

It's OK if You are an Ohio Republican in Indiana.

Buckminster July 1, 2011 at 1:06 pm

Who the heck thought this was a good idea? In Montana, the lege is known for causing the alcohol consumption rate to skyrocket when it's in session. Even the Governor berated the lege for the drunken tomfoolery.

Chet Kincaid July 1, 2011 at 1:54 pm

Not "lezhe"! Iss "lezhizhlayshure"!! (Passes out at podium)

Chet Kincaid July 1, 2011 at 1:17 pm

FOX Chyron: Mecklenborg (D-Mass.)

Redhead July 1, 2011 at 1:21 pm

He was planning to hit (and kill) a young pregnant woman on her way to the abortion clinic. See – dead women can't get abortions! So he's still anti-choice!

horsedreamer_1 July 1, 2011 at 1:25 pm

We shall call this State Representative the Borg Whore.

ThundercatHo July 1, 2011 at 1:27 pm

Damn, there goes my fantasy of them all getting drunk and shooting each other (at least the R;s.)

LowProfileinGA July 1, 2011 at 2:10 pm

I believe you have confused Ohio with Alaska – a common error.

elburritodeluxe July 1, 2011 at 2:10 pm

Less than 1%? Man, wake me up when he's done something wrong.

elburritodeluxe July 1, 2011 at 2:13 pm

He's married with three kids but it doesn't sound like the lady in the car was Mrs. Rep. Drunklingfetus. Maybe he was driving this nice lady to church!

owhatever July 1, 2011 at 2:22 pm

He HAD to drive because Obama stole his private jet and he could no longer pick up a hooker and fly like a normal person. The Kenyan hates America.

JustPixelz July 1, 2011 at 2:32 pm

Wine coolers, Viagra, a female passenger and a Lexus. Somebody needs a hug. OH WAIT. I meant kick in the balls.

I know it's totally undemocratic, but I think only lady legislators should be allowed to vote on laws about lady parts. And — to be fair — boy legislators only vote on laws about boy parts.

Ducksworthy July 1, 2011 at 2:33 pm

Can I bring my guns into this bar too?

JustPixelz July 1, 2011 at 2:39 pm

59 year old Mecklenborg "…was accompanied by 26-year-old Tiona Roberts, who is not his wife."

At least it's not something he should be ashamed of.

OurHoboSenator July 1, 2011 at 5:04 pm

A bar, but no 18% alcohol beer. Thanks a lot, Bill Batchelder!

horsedreamer_1 July 1, 2011 at 7:02 pm

God hates term limits.

PristineODummy July 2, 2011 at 1:34 am

Not Brown Enough.

Jukesgrrl July 2, 2011 at 2:04 am

Not unlike the Devil's Triangle that was the birthplace of your Jukesgrrl: Ohio/Pennsylvania/West Virginia. Very scary.

zhubajie July 2, 2011 at 7:40 pm

>

Negropolis July 2, 2011 at 3:44 am

Elmo/Muppet Libel!

Do not besmirtched the sterling reputation of America's favorite muppet. He may only be three-and-a-half years old, but he has more sense and wisdom than humans many times his age.

gurukalehuru July 3, 2011 at 5:41 am

I'm guessing the gal was from Tennessee.

gurukalehuru July 3, 2011 at 6:00 am

Tiona??? Get that girl a film contract, stat.

gurukalehuru July 3, 2011 at 6:15 am

I believe this is the young lady in question, unless there are more Tiona Robertses out there. Anyway, I'd hit it. http://www.facebook.com/people/Tiona-Roberts/1000

gurukalehuru July 3, 2011 at 9:27 am

I believe this is the young lady in question, unless there are more Tiona Robertses out there. Anyway, I'd hit it.

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