JOURNAMALISM  9:21 am July 1, 2011

WSJ To Obama: Some Poor Rich People Can’t Even Afford Private Jets At All

by Kirsten Boyd Johnson

poor little rich man, no one cares about him.Does anyone seem to understand the fact that there are some very poor rich people out there who are not even wealthy enough to be able to afford a corporate jet? DOES ANYONE? Conservative tabloid The Wall Street Journal is not convinced that even the President of the United States knows this, so they typed out some important journalism that was titled, “Obama Calls People Making $250,000 a Year ‘Jet Owners.’” That’ll show him! Just more of the WSJ‘s typical Pulitzer-prize winning reporting, a job well done. EXCEPT THAT Obama never actually said this, at all, ever. Someone eventually noticed this and now the blog post is just titled with a dumb tip: “Note to Obama: $250,000-a-Year Earners Can’t Afford Jets.” Uh, thanks? Obama will try to remember not to close the tax loopholes on these peoples’ imaginary jets.

What is the point of the WSJ blog post? There isn’t one. Here it is trying to make the point that probably the taxes on corporate jets aren’t actually even so bad, but, uh, everyone should remember that not all rich people can afford private air travel:

It is possible, of course, that someone earning $250,000 a year might spend 5% to 10% of their annual income on a single flight by chartering, in which case we could call them “corporate-jet fliers.” But it is unlikely. Even more unlikely is someone earning $250,000 a year paying $500,000 to $1 million a year to operate a jet–even if they received it free.

According to Mr. Duckson and others, most of those who own their own jets have net worths of $100 million or more and earn more than $10 million a year–minimum.

The President may be right that is fair to tax private-jet owners. He may even be right that it is fair to raise taxes on those earnings more than $250,000 a year. But the only kind of jet owned by people earning $250,000 a year would be the kind that sits on your desk.

Does everyone feel better at math now? Thanks for that, WSJ. We’ll try to keep those unfortunate poor rich people in mind. NEVER FORGET, etc. [WSJ.com]

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 298 comments }

memzilla July 1, 2011 at 9:23 am

Since Teatards so easily swallow the propaganda of the Corporatist Class Warfare Elite — Kochs, Norquist, Ryan, Walker et al. — it's only fair that this corporate jet deficit be subsidized by raising taxes on Hoverounds™.

Slogan: "Cheesy Fries for Friendly Skies!"

comrad_darkness July 1, 2011 at 9:54 am

I'd actually be all for this. I'd be for them actually paying for their own hoverrounds in the first place. You and I paid for the damn things.

donner_froh July 1, 2011 at 9:25 am

It must be a lot tougher than I realized, getting by on just $250,000 a year.

Terry July 1, 2011 at 9:42 am

I'd like to try it, just to be sure.

Texan_Bulldog July 1, 2011 at 9:43 am

That's the new right wing meme, I guess. I have a RW Facebook friend that posted:

"Last time I checked millionaires & billionaires were those individuals who have a net worth of $1,000,000+ and $1,000,000,000+ respectively, NOT those making $250,000. per year. That is a HUGE discrepancy in defining "rich"."

This chick doesn't work; her husband does but he probably makes about $65K a year. I'm fairly sure if they bumped up to $250K a year, they would consider themselves pretty rich. Another example of RW dullards doing the business of their stupid overlords who don't give a shit about them in the first place.

trampndirtdown July 1, 2011 at 9:46 am

But a union thug (teacher) making$50,000 per year is living in fat city.

Gaetan Dugas July 1, 2011 at 10:25 am

http://www.familytaxpayers.org/salary.php

Every year here in Illinois, the colleges & universities turn out more than 8 times the number of teachers than there are openings in the state's public K-12 system. In some areas like communication arts (English) and social studies, the ratio is 15 graduates for every one job opening. The lowest ratios are in math and science (4:1).

If teachers are so underpaid, why do so many people go into the field?

Supply & demand, sweetheart.

The local elementary school has a PE teacher whose salary is $117,000. He is out the door every day about an hour before the end of school, to go to his other job where he does private tennis coaching at a local country club. He has a student teacher handle his last two class periods every day.

BobSalem July 1, 2011 at 10:45 am

Now dont go confusing these libtards with facts. The libtards real issue is that they do not want to EARN anything, they want someone else to do all the work and they expect that they deserve the rewards.

The Ant and Grasshopper – Two Different Morals

OLD VERSION

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away..

Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.

The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!!!!!!

MODERN VERSION

The ant works hard in the withering heat and the rain all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while he is cold and starving.

MSNBC, CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.

Liberals and Democrats are stunned by the sharp contrast.

How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Jessie Jackson & Al Sharpton appears on Oprah with the grasshopper and everybody cries when they sing, 'It's Not Easy Being ME.'

ACORN stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news stations film the group singing, “We shall overcome.” Then Rev. Jeremiah Wright has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.

President Obama condemns the ant and blames President Bush, President Reagan, Christopher Columbus, and the Pope for the grasshopper's plight.

Nancy Pelosi & Harry Reid exclaim in an interview with Larry King that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share.

Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity & Anti-Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of the summer.

The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the Government Green Czar and given to the grasshopper.

Dashboard_Jesus July 3, 2011 at 1:54 am

fucking moron sez WTF? get a grip, on your own dick, sweetheart…asshole…also, too

V572 [SSAN] July 1, 2011 at 9:50 am

Everybody conflates income with wealth too. If you earn $250K/year without working, you're really wealthy, because you probably have at least $6M in stocks and bonds'n'such. If you earn the same annual income at some pitiful W2-type job somewhere, and have two kids to put through college and a crushing mortgage and payments on the SUV, then you don't feel rich, particularly when you compare yourself to these 'suckers flying private and not getting TSA-groped and riding limos to their fancy hotels and multiple houses in desirable locations with clean air, beaches, etc.

SorosBot July 1, 2011 at 10:13 am

But if you make that much money and have kids to put through college, you'll probably actually be able to pay full tuition and they won't be graduating with the normal tens of thousands of dollars in debt; and the family of anyone who goes to college without loans or a scholarship is most definitely rich.

V572 [SSAN] July 1, 2011 at 10:26 am

Didn’t say “was rich”; I said “feel rich.” Just for fun, let’s do the math!$250K income less 22% federal taxes, less 7.5% FICA and Medicare, less 8% state income tax in NY or CA leaves about $156,250 in disposable income. Say the mortgage on that McMansion is  $36K year, and the taxes are another $5K.  Tuition for Ryan and Cody at the right sort of trust-fund madrassas is $40K per offspring. So we’re down to $35,250/year, or $2,937.50/month for retirement savings, food, cars,  home maintenance, kids’ allowance, gas, vacations, and other expenses we ordinary mortals can comprehend.Not saying anyone should be sympathetic to this plight, most of which (the sprawlville mansion, the high-priced schools) is a personal choice.

Gaetan Dugas July 1, 2011 at 10:31 am

"the family of anyone who goes to college without loans or a scholarship is most definitely rich."

Most definitely? False.

Some families plan, scrimp, and save to put their kids through college without debt, but that doesn't make them rich.

Biel_ze_Bubba July 1, 2011 at 1:01 pm

"the family of anyone who goes to college without loans or a scholarship is most definitely rich." Really? All it means is that the parents were able to pump money into a 529 account … it says nothing about much was left over, or how well they lived on it.

What''s "rich" depends hugely on where you live, and under what circumstances. I think we can agree that $250k/yr lets you live a pretty comfy life under certain circumstances. (Single, no mortgage, living in small-town "real" America, etc.)
But let's see how poor you could possibly be: living in NYC (there goes $100k to taxes), renting a decent 2-br apartment ($50k/year), paying private school tution for two kids ($60k), health insurance for all ($15k), and an inadequate contribution of $5k to your 401k, leaves you with $20k/yr, or $385 a week, for groceries and subway fare. Nobody's crying for you yet, but you sure as hell aren't getting rich. Better stick the kids in public school (wince!) , or move to New Jersey (ditto!), if you want any of those decadent American luxuries like college tuition, a Honda, or savings of any kind.

At least New Yorkers get to kick wine onto Glenn Beck's picnic blanket, which makes it worth all the hassle.

prommie July 1, 2011 at 10:24 am

It ain't a picnic being a high-earning wage slave. You're still a wage slave. Doctors and lawyers, their time is money, $200 to $400 or $500 an hour, its puts on constant pressure, taking an afternoon nap is like throwing $1,000 in the trash. Rich is living off capital. Living off your labor, you're still just a working person.

V572 [SSAN] July 1, 2011 at 10:27 am

Agreed. See my workout in response to Sorosbot’s refutation.

AnarchyWolf July 1, 2011 at 11:58 am

Yeah, that's fair enough.

Boojum_Reborn July 1, 2011 at 12:37 pm

Agreed. I do that, as a discrimination lawyer (representing working people). I still think taxes should be higher for people who make $250K a year, and MUCH higher for people who make $1m or $10m a year.

Franklin Roosevelt proposed a maximum wage, with everything above $25,000 being taxed at 100%. Interesting idea.

MissTaken July 1, 2011 at 1:14 pm

Agreed. If you still got to get out of bed every day and deal with bosses/customers/etc even if they pay you a wage that makes the time away from your job not that miserable you are still a slave to your work. People who make gobs of money off investments while they are spending Christmas in St Bart's and summering in the Hamptons and rarely, if ever, have to step foot in an office or other workplace are not slaves to their work.

natoslug July 1, 2011 at 11:41 am

I've given up and blocked all posts by my RW friends, facebook or otherwise. I was tired of the whining every time I responded to some asinine comment of theirs with "Are you wilfully ignorant or just a fucking moron?"

SonofSpermcube July 4, 2011 at 10:26 am

If you can't get yourself to a net worth of a million dollars within 5 years on 250k (after tax) a year, you are aren't trying. If you can't do it in a decade you are a moron.

If you consistently make 250k a year, you should become a millionaire at some point.

freakishlywrong July 1, 2011 at 9:26 am

Do Cons really think harping on the misfortunes of bazillionaires is really going to rally anyone but the mazillionaires to their empty cause? And what's up with the chick—–>
blowing that cuke?

Edit: I was not first.

comrad_darkness July 1, 2011 at 9:31 am

It's a hot pepper, isn't it? That's my fantasy. Nothing like a gal who likes getting her endorphin rush the natural way.

Ohforcripessake July 1, 2011 at 9:32 am

"What's up with the chick.."

I dunno, let's watch the "shocking video".. o_O

Oblios_Cap July 1, 2011 at 9:39 am

She "Loves" her veggies all right!

Lascauxcaveman July 1, 2011 at 11:46 am

Let's just say I was hoping I would be a little more shocked. The "be a vegan and bone hott chix like this" campaign promise is a bit of a stretch. Maybe their idea is to convert 14-year-old boys to the no-meat class.

SorosBot July 1, 2011 at 9:49 am

Well she really doesn't know how to spell her own name for one.

ChessieNefercat July 1, 2011 at 10:16 am

I'm guessing that with her apparent skill set, spelling ability, even her own name, isn't critical to whatever job she might be offered.

CapeClod July 1, 2011 at 10:38 am

I'm just glad that there are no more ads that has the yelling blonde with the tatooed face and giant hooped earings that has nothing to do with the mortgage company the ad is for.

Chet Kincaid July 1, 2011 at 10:43 am

I think she might be one of the Kardashians, in which case she is hiding her best asset.

e_z July 1, 2011 at 1:06 pm

"Do Cons really think harping on the misfortunes of bazillionaires is really going to rally anyone"

Yup, it continues to work to this day for no reason that makes sense to me.

SonofSpermcube July 4, 2011 at 10:27 am

You've never visited Freep, have you?

One day, I too will be rich.

FNMA July 1, 2011 at 9:27 am

That logic is certainly unassailable. Incomprehensible too.

gvvt July 1, 2011 at 1:16 pm

The two go together mighty well.

comrad_darkness July 1, 2011 at 9:28 am

Ba Ba Ba Barry and the Jetsssssss . . . .

ChessieNefercat July 1, 2011 at 9:28 am

Wait. If I ever make $250,000 a year, I have to put a jet (one of those gluey models?) on your desk? Why? I'm confused.

Come here a minute July 1, 2011 at 10:19 am

If you made $250,000 a year, you'd understand.

natoslug July 1, 2011 at 11:42 am

If you hadn't picked the wrong day to quit sniffing glue, you'd understand.

LouBristol July 1, 2011 at 9:28 am

How much do the Obamas make? Don't they have a jet plane? Dear WSJ, pls investigate.

DashboardBuddha July 1, 2011 at 9:28 am

As I drive home this afternoon in my 11 year old Plymouth Neon I'll be thinking of these fuckwads. Also this: "earn more than $10 million a year–minimum."

Earn? Yeah, right.

comrad_darkness July 1, 2011 at 9:38 am

Purely capitalist question for these bitches, how much economic value did you really add last year? For the bankers they damn well better be mining gold with a pick ax to make up for the billions of negative value they "added" to the economy in 2008/9. Fuckers.

AnarchyWolf July 1, 2011 at 12:02 pm

They think that making "smart" investments (read:lucky) is the same thing as earning.

Rosie_Scenario July 1, 2011 at 9:29 am

I heard Jerry Lewis isn't hosting the MDA telethon this year. Perhaps a fundraiser for our poor rich is in order. Teabaggers, get on your Hoverounds and organize this posthaste. Someday you, too, may be a poor rich. Put your money where your votes are.

Sue4466 July 1, 2011 at 9:29 am

It's the whole Joe the Plumber thing all over again: $250K isn't rich! Then everyone argues over the meaning of "rich" and forgets about the $3billion in corporate jet subsidies.

Arguing by distraction. AKA, hey look! something shiny!

comrad_darkness July 1, 2011 at 9:42 am

And the plumber/winner is so stunningly clued into business practices that he fails to grasp deducting costs before reporting profit to the IRS.

GOPCrusher July 1, 2011 at 12:51 pm

Same thought process as whining about raising taxes on small businesses as they are the primary job creators, while GE paid 0 tax on 14.2 billion dollars profit for 2010.

MaxUdargo July 1, 2011 at 1:59 pm

Yeah, I know corporate bigwigs who don't make millions of dollars a year but regularly fly on corporate jets. They don't own the jets, but their companies do.

Also, just because the graduated brackets kick in at about $250K and cost those taxpayers more doesn't mean the $250K crowd is going to get slammed with substantially higher taxes.

God, this stuff isn't fun at all when you take it seriously. Maxy gotta go to Mexico in his speedo and get his snark bark back.

Ohforcripessake July 1, 2011 at 9:29 am

Boo-fucking-hoo

freakishlywrong July 1, 2011 at 9:58 am

Holy shit! Mind meld…

freakishlywrong July 1, 2011 at 9:30 am

Oh, and WSJ? We so poor we can't afford corporate toilet paper, so, boofuckinghoo..

gvvt July 1, 2011 at 1:18 pm

for our jet… Maybe we could hire poor folk to lick our asses…

Barb July 1, 2011 at 9:31 am

Poor rich people. Soon they will be reduced to buying "Caviar Helper" at Macy's to stretch their food budget.

V572 [SSAN] July 1, 2011 at 9:54 am

Ha ha, like the Riches ever set foot in Macy's. Nordstrom is as downscale as they dare go.

hagajim July 1, 2011 at 9:32 am

Remember, WSJ is now just another Faux shill. And we all know little Rupert has his own private jet.

Tundra Grifter July 1, 2011 at 9:33 am

When the right wing nutz want to complain about government workers making 'way too much money, $150,000 a year is a fortune.

When the right wing nutz want to stick up for the little guy, folks making $250K a year are just making it.

OK – which is it?

comrad_darkness July 1, 2011 at 9:49 am

Ha ha ha, expecting consistency. You so funny.

snarkycomments July 1, 2011 at 11:24 am

It's actually a smooth curve, at exactly $200K a year the tea baggers neither love you nor hate you. In fact, you become absolutely invisible and can walk into their tea parties and steal their crumpets. Unfortunately, the curve extends out: at $1M a year they will give you a complete tongue bath any time you ask, at $0 a year they want to skull-fuck your corpse.

ChessieNefercat July 1, 2011 at 9:33 am

And, the ad with the lady that looks like Eva Longoria in a sea of tomatoes (cranberries? chili peppers?) is okay, but the blond with the giant cucumber (zucchini?) is just tacky. Why am I seeing it? Am I reading too many Sarah Palin posts?

If I click on the St. Jude ad and donate (God bless you, Danny Thomas) will you make tacky blond lady go away?

orygoon July 1, 2011 at 9:37 am

Hint to those people who "only" make 250K: they can pay fifty bucks or something and cut in the Southwest lines in front of me. It's almost as good as having a corporate jet, I think.

prommie July 1, 2011 at 10:28 am

Cutting to the front of all the lines is the single coolest thing about first and business class. That and having a seat a human can fit in.

finallyhappy July 1, 2011 at 4:59 pm

I flew business class once(a credit card deal). Go in first, get a seat that totally reclines, excellent service, special line at passport control and a super arrival lounge in London. So the rich do have it better. I go back to Air Tran and trying to find enough room to put my purse.

prommie July 1, 2011 at 10:33 am

But it ain't $50, a first class ticket can cost 10 times what a coach ticket costs.

orygoon July 1, 2011 at 5:12 pm

ASouthwest doesn't have first class quite like that.

smitallica July 1, 2011 at 9:37 am

Every time I drive through some wealthy neighborhood (and my city has some ridiculously wealthy neighborhoods), where I see jobless moms in tennis outfits heading to Starbucks or to meet their trainer, Hispanic nannies pushing very non-Hispanic children in Swedish strollers, or an enormous mansion getting an addition built on, I say the same thing, out loud:
"And these are the poor souls whose taxes we can't raise."

KotBR July 1, 2011 at 10:45 am

I hope you're not driving a non-luxury car through those neighborhoods. That's grounds for arrest right there.

AnarchyWolf July 1, 2011 at 12:08 pm

And if you're riding a bicycle for transport rather than entertainment you'll be shot on the spot.

Lascauxcaveman July 1, 2011 at 12:40 pm

I got through Newport Beach (twice!) in a rented Dodge Cirrus. Even parked it for a couple hours on one of those end-streets where you can walk right onto the beach. But I had my toddler with me, so I'm guessing the cops thought I was some rich kid's nanny.

finallyhappy July 1, 2011 at 5:02 pm

no- because you could be one of the assorted home workers coming to do your job- masseuse/trainer/in home facialist/laundress.

GOPCrusher July 1, 2011 at 12:56 pm

You answered your own question. They created jobs for those undocumented Hispanic nannies.

gvvt July 1, 2011 at 1:25 pm

That's why they must continue to pay no taxes. Jobs Are Number One.

Oblios_Cap July 1, 2011 at 9:38 am

The President may be right that is fair to tax private-jet owners. He may even be right that it is fair to raise taxes on those earnings more than $250,000 a year.

The most shocking part about this statement is the WSJ dared to put it in print!

You wouldn't see that sort of reasonableness foolishness in the Investors Business Daily, no sir!

mavenmaven July 1, 2011 at 9:38 am

That's the reason we can't have a black president, he is simply too out of touch with the needs of our corporate overlords.

AnarchyWolf July 1, 2011 at 12:09 pm

At the end of the day this crap is mostly just lip service to keep up the illusion that the riches hate barry, in reality he is squarely in their pocket.

Texan_Bulldog July 1, 2011 at 9:39 am

Any pub that has John Fund and Peggington Noonan (I miss Wonkette's takedown of her columns) on staff can really empathize with the poor little man.

freakishlywrong July 1, 2011 at 10:03 am

Me too., man/gal/pooch. You can still see her on Morning Blow, that is, until she calls Obama a "dick". That seems to be the breaking point over there.

Lionel[redacted]Esq July 1, 2011 at 1:15 pm

But Dame Noonan would never allow herself on some modern convience like a jet plane. Ornithopters or nothign for her.

YasserArraFeck July 1, 2011 at 9:40 am

What the "Hamburger Helper" slogan? "One pound, one pack – let's eat" or something like that? Do you know have many little jars of caviar you'd have to open to get a pound? Can we organize a "broken nail repair" tax break for those struggling "down to my last billion" plutocrats? "The Jetstream needs gas again, and I just broke a fucking nail!! I CAN'T GO ON!! I NEED ANOTHER TAX BREAK!!

LesBontemps July 1, 2011 at 9:40 am

What if your jet has TruckNutz? (Do they make JetNutz? 'Cause that would be hilarious.)

salt_bagel July 1, 2011 at 9:45 am

All the jets you see outdoors are girls. All the male jets don't do shit, and live underground with the queen jet.

LesBontemps July 1, 2011 at 10:03 am

The wonders of Nature!

Chet Kincaid July 1, 2011 at 11:10 am

Pixar would like to buy the rights to this comment.

Chet Kincaid July 1, 2011 at 11:08 am

You don't need TruckNutz for compensation when you can buy all the women you need.

muthalovin July 1, 2011 at 9:41 am

Note to Obama: Jets are cool!

AJWjr. July 1, 2011 at 10:11 am

Sharks are cooler, though.

Lascauxcaveman July 1, 2011 at 12:59 pm

When you’re a Jet,
You’re the top cat in town,
You’re the gold-medal kid
With the heavyweight crown!

gvvt July 1, 2011 at 1:28 pm

Glitter and be Gay… http://youtu.be/GcmAdS8vkDA

OneYieldRegular July 1, 2011 at 9:41 am

I'm glad someone spent the time to investigate this important issue. I'd have done it myself, but I'm too busy scrounging hobo beans out of dumpsters.

ChessieNefercat July 1, 2011 at 10:02 am

"I'm glad someone spent the time to investigate this important issue. I'd have done it myself, but I'm too busy scrounging hobo beans out of dumpsters."

And see, that's the difference between the jet-wielding overlords and you. They are willing to set their worries aside for a moment to write important perspectives on these issues and enter into challenging discussions regarding the potential crippling of our entire society.

While you think only of yourself and your selfish needs for occasional nutrition, so that you can maintain the strength needed to fling yourself up, and over, and into the dumpsters.

DerrickWildcat July 1, 2011 at 9:43 am

That's some fucked up shit.

EatsBabyDingos July 1, 2011 at 9:43 am

News: "WSJ announces major policy intitiative of the filthy rich. To help the budget, they will only use $50 bills to wipe their asses instead of $100's. For three minutes this afternoon starting at 4:27 pm eastern standard time. They will then go to your job and ask for "change they can believe in" from the crap-encrusted $50's.

salt_bagel July 1, 2011 at 9:43 am

The fuck you expect me to do with this $250,000 salary, then? Live comfortably and never have to worry about buying what I want? WHAT IF A JET IS WHAT I WANT?

ChessieNefercat July 1, 2011 at 10:41 am

You should have thought about that before you decided not be a millionaire!

V572 [SSAN] July 1, 2011 at 9:44 am

The Murdochian contempt for pitiful proles earning $250K/year or less fairly drips off that rationale, even when block-quoted. "I'm sorry, Tyrone [or Miguel], that I have to explain this to you, but I'll try to keep it in terms even you can understand…"

Advn2rgirl July 1, 2011 at 9:45 am

Wait, I thought Rome fell because their mercenary army figured out there were more of them than of the rich people who hired them because they didn't want to defend the empire themselves and so they sacked the joint? ( Xe, I'm looking at you….)

AnarchyWolf July 1, 2011 at 12:06 pm

Oh please, Xe and all the mercenary scum are firmly in the pocket of wealth and influence. Who else do you think will be guarding the rich's compounds when it all comes crashing down.

elviouslyqueer July 1, 2011 at 9:45 am

Waiter, I'd like some cheese to go with this whine. A nice Brie if you've got it, especially if it's really really weepy.

BaldarTFlagass July 1, 2011 at 9:46 am

I had a bunch of jets when I was much younger. Built them myself. Got tired of them as I entered puberty, though, and blew them up with firecrackers. Airfix/Revell/Tamiya FTW!!!

DashboardBuddha July 1, 2011 at 9:51 am

Man…it's like we're twins! And ships! A friend of mine had a small above-ground pool and one summer we had our own suburban "Iron Bottom Sound"

BaldarTFlagass July 1, 2011 at 9:59 am

Good times!

trampndirtdown July 1, 2011 at 10:05 am

Patience grasshopper

BaldarTFlagass July 1, 2011 at 11:40 am

Yeah. No shit. And now I can't delete it.

DashboardBuddha July 1, 2011 at 10:05 am

The best. I even had the old Monogram Douglas Dauntless that would drop a bomb. Take that, Soryu!

lurch394 July 1, 2011 at 11:43 am

You boys seen Super 8 yet? No model trains were harmed in the filming.

Oblios_Cap July 1, 2011 at 9:54 am

It was more fun to melt bread wrappers and bomb the bastards with incindiaries!

hagajim July 1, 2011 at 11:41 am

Did you pay the firecracker tax?

Cash4HoboBeans July 1, 2011 at 2:59 pm

Blowing up jets with firecrackers–doesn't that make you a muslin terrist?

Boojum_Reborn July 1, 2011 at 3:06 pm

My brother (Lazy Media) and I used to do this. Load ships with explosives and push them out in the lake. Fireship!

samsuncle July 1, 2011 at 9:46 am

Since taking over the WSJ Murdoch has reduced it to National Inquirer status.

elviouslyqueer July 1, 2011 at 10:08 am

No no. The Enquirer gets its stories right every once in a while.

lurch394 July 1, 2011 at 10:38 am

Not National Lampoon?

SorosBot July 1, 2011 at 11:07 am

The editorial page has always been disgusting; for one, they spread the vile "Vince Foster was murdered by the Clintons" conspiracy theory, and have never apologized for it; but Murdoch's just spread the vomit to the news coverage as well.

trampndirtdown July 1, 2011 at 9:48 am

But i thought it was because of marriage equality, that's what Bryan Fisher said.

weejee July 1, 2011 at 9:49 am

Come on Kristen, cut the WSJ a break. They are likely in such a state since the Faux teevee light for Glenn Beck went out yesterday. They are having a terrible sad and simply not able to put forth their best work.

Goonemeritus July 1, 2011 at 9:49 am

The good news in all of this is that the arguments for not taxing the rich and corporations more are getting increasingly arcane. At some point even Teatards will look at the patched tires on their Hoverround’s and start asking 1934 style questions. And as we have seen there is no better mob than an ignorant mob.

Limeylizzie July 1, 2011 at 9:49 am

Oh the comments over there are unbelievable, clever use of racial slurs.."He's a Cune" and people referring to him and his "ugly" wife.

freakishlywrong July 1, 2011 at 10:13 am

I don't know how you do it. I can't wade in those fever swamps anymore. The hate is really debilitating.

Barb July 1, 2011 at 10:36 am

Watch this video. http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/tue-november-4-

Watch Stephen Colbert tear up and try to hide it. It is a delightful palate cleanser when you run across people who think the POTUS is a "cune"

Mumbletypeg July 1, 2011 at 9:49 am

Needs Moar Peggeh~

EDIT: Subscription-only?! Nooningtonshire's gone gated-community on us. Too bad; there's a tantalizing column-link to her latest, headlined something-something-Jon-Huntsman's-Enema..

Chillwaver July 1, 2011 at 9:50 am

Speaking of shitty math, Rupert Murdock's News Corporation bought Myspace in 2005 for $580 million and sold it yesterday for $35 million. How many jets can you buy for $545 million?

DashboardBuddha July 1, 2011 at 9:54 am

You can buy 545 of these babies:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Extra_EA-400

comrad_darkness July 1, 2011 at 9:57 am

You would hope fools and their money would be parted like this more often. Sadly not.

ChessieNefercat July 1, 2011 at 10:08 am

"Speaking of shitty math, Rupert Murdock's News Corporation bought Myspace in 2005 for $580 million and sold it yesterday for $35 million. How many jets can you buy for $545 million?"

Wait, what?! And we are supposed to read their economic yammerings, because boy howdy, they're the ones that know how money works?

SorosBot July 1, 2011 at 10:10 am

Sold it for $35 million to Justin Timberlake; I don't know if anyone has a clue what he's going to do with it. Meanwhile, I've got a 20 in my pocket and think that might be a good offer for Friendster…

Chillwaver July 1, 2011 at 10:25 am

Remember, this is the same idiot that broke up with Jessica Biel….also, didn't he own Napster at some point?

GOPCrusher July 1, 2011 at 1:08 pm

Quite a return on their investment.
Lenny Dykstra just called and said he wanted some financial advice.

comrad_darkness July 1, 2011 at 9:51 am

Don't forget about starting endless wars in distant lands that bankrupt the republic.

arihaya July 1, 2011 at 10:45 am

precisely,, Eastern Roman Empire was exhausted to the bones from wars against Sassanid Persia when Arabic army swept half of their territory

Chet Kincaid July 1, 2011 at 10:59 am

Yeah, everybody knows you never try to hold Asia–it's too big and can be attacked from 4 other continents. If you can hold South America or Australia and wait a few hours, your horde can pillage all the way to Greenland!

Lascauxcaveman July 1, 2011 at 12:07 pm

Sounds like Risky business.

gvvt July 1, 2011 at 1:21 pm

…never get bogged down in a ground war

Oblios_Cap July 1, 2011 at 9:52 am

I think that came out back in 2000.

BaldarTFlagass July 1, 2011 at 9:53 am

So, the WSJ is quibbling about an issue of semantics? "People earning $250K can't afford jets." That's your point? What a waste of newsprint and ink and bandwidth.

FNMA July 1, 2011 at 10:03 am

It's very easy to follow. While it may be OK to raise taxes for people who make more than $250K a year, and while it may be OK to end loopholes for private jets, it can only follow that people who make $250K a year can't afford private jets.
Makes perfect sense.
If you've spent the morning huffing paint.

Gleem_McShineys July 1, 2011 at 2:23 pm

If you've spent the morning huffing paint Rupert taint.

Oblios_Cap July 1, 2011 at 9:53 am

I do it driving my car from America's Dinghus™ to the Jersey Shore!

SorosBot July 1, 2011 at 9:53 am

That, and being taken over by a crazed fundamentalist death cult that despised all knowledge and tried to destroy all the books that weren't written by members of that cult, what was it called again; oh yeah, Christianity.

comrad_darkness July 1, 2011 at 9:56 am

Yeah, funny how the more Christianity took hold, the more all to hell it went. Perfect inverse relationship.

gvvt July 1, 2011 at 1:21 pm

except for the inverse part – pretty straightforward, I suspect.

Chet Kincaid July 1, 2011 at 9:54 am

Lighten up! It is difficult for Murdoch to type accurately with those socks on.

natoslug July 1, 2011 at 11:48 am

If he'd quit focusing so much attention on that third sock, it'd be easier.

ChessieNefercat July 1, 2011 at 9:54 am

I just loved during the 2008 election how they kept tossing around $250,000 as little ol' middle class folks; the happy families in the Hamburger Helper ads.

Now, part of me really does understand even from way up here in the upper peninsula of the upper peninsula that in big cities, a couple that each have just middling level corporate jobs may be pulling in $250,000, and that the ordinary living expenses of that area may eat up a good part of that income, making them just working folks and probably living paycheck to paycheck.

But, I would hear repeatedly about how much help these humble middle class people making "only" $250,000 a year needed. And I would think, what does that make me, making (gross) just 1/10 of that amount? A peasant scratching for sticks outside the castle gates?

trampndirtdown July 1, 2011 at 10:08 am

And I would think, what does that make me, making (gross) just 1/10 of that amount? A peasant scratching for sticks outside the castle gates? Yep.

elviouslyqueer July 1, 2011 at 10:14 am

Arbeit macht frei, darling.

ChessieNefercat July 1, 2011 at 10:45 am

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

natoslug July 1, 2011 at 11:49 am

I hope you paid for those sticks, missy!

ChessieNefercat July 1, 2011 at 12:24 pm

Oops. I was hungry?
{backing slowly away, curtseying…}

prommie July 1, 2011 at 12:56 pm

You gotta move!

Chet Kincaid July 1, 2011 at 9:56 am

Uhm, would the proprietors please explain why "Kortney" is fellating a giant cucumber in the middle column?

FNMA July 1, 2011 at 10:06 am

Practice makes perfect.

elviouslyqueer July 1, 2011 at 10:12 am

Nice try, Chet. But I'm still not turning off my NoScript ad blocker.

samsuncle July 1, 2011 at 10:44 am

To up her "p" points?

GOPCrusher July 1, 2011 at 1:11 pm

She's auditioning to land herself a NBA player?

SorosBot July 1, 2011 at 9:57 am

Um, someone should tell the fucktards at the Wall Street journal that Obama's proposals to slightly increase the top marginal tax rate and eliminate the deduction for corporate jets are not really related to each other except that they're both ways to raise revenue and try and make the tax code somewhat equitable and sane again.

But no, won't somebody please think of the rich but not super-rich?

SonofSpermcube July 4, 2011 at 10:18 am

Um, they're asking for consideration for the super-rich as well.

Urban_Achiever July 1, 2011 at 9:57 am

Today, we are all corporate jet owners……wait WHAT!!??? Awesome!!!

Radiotherapy® July 1, 2011 at 10:26 am

Where's my flying car?

arihaya July 1, 2011 at 10:39 am

road? where we're going we don't need … road

GOPCrusher July 1, 2011 at 1:12 pm

Where's my jet pack?

DashboardBuddha July 1, 2011 at 9:58 am

Yeah…but you're cool with the proles. These folks breath different air than we do.

AnarchyWolf July 1, 2011 at 12:13 pm

Well someone has to breath the toxic fumes from their industrial ventures. What are they gonna do? Not poison the air and befoul the land?

neiltheblaze July 1, 2011 at 9:58 am

Does anyone know of a good way to tenderize millionaire rump? I assume it's a slow-cooking process, right?

Mahousu July 1, 2011 at 10:07 am

Oh, they're already pretty tender. Or at least hypersensitive.

FNMA July 1, 2011 at 10:07 am

Ball-peen hammer works too.

Radiotherapy® July 1, 2011 at 10:35 am

Job creator sweetbread is a delicacy in certain parts.

AnarchyWolf July 1, 2011 at 12:22 pm

I love how that's their defense, "Ooh we create jobs, you can't hurt us, we'll take away your jobs." Does no one understand that that is for all intents and purposes; extortion? Basically legal extortion. I mean for fuck's sake.

not that Dewey July 1, 2011 at 10:00 am

So if I trade in the ink jet (on my desk) for a laser, I can haz loophole?

orygoon July 1, 2011 at 10:01 am

The WSJ has no idea how lucky they are that Obama is "running things" and that I am not Emperor Of The World. Then they wouldn't even have "private cars", because I'd replace roads with conveyor belts.

AnarchyWolf July 1, 2011 at 12:23 pm

You aren't familiar with the global energy situation are you?

johnnymeatworth July 1, 2011 at 10:02 am

Barry COULD sell rides on Air Force One to everyone who makes $250,000 a year and can't afford their own jet, then put that money against the national debt….

Gaetan Dugas July 1, 2011 at 10:13 am

Barry is already swapping US assets and special government favors in exchange for contributions to his campaign.

SorosBot July 1, 2011 at 10:25 am

Citation needed.

ChessieNefercat July 1, 2011 at 10:32 am

You forgot to add, "and not from WND."

GOPCrusher July 1, 2011 at 1:18 pm

He gave a No-Bid contract to Halliburton?

deanbooth July 1, 2011 at 10:02 am

I'm applying for jet stamps.

GunToting[Redacted] July 1, 2011 at 10:03 am

Actually, I know/am related to someone who has one of these… At one point he was probably pulling in $1M/day. He has one of those jet shares. And, he's a giant fucking hippie liberal.

elviouslyqueer July 1, 2011 at 10:04 am

But, but, I thought it was all the gratuitous gay buttsecksing.

genxr July 1, 2011 at 10:04 am

No way. Rome fell because of socialism imposed by Ceasar Blackius Maximus.

freakishlywrong July 1, 2011 at 10:07 am

Today, we are all Veruca Salt.

ChessieNefercat July 1, 2011 at 3:19 pm

I thought for a minute you meant we were all warts (Verruca) until I looked more closely at the spelling. So I looked up Veruca Salt and what do you know? There's no difference really.

ChessieNefercat July 1, 2011 at 10:09 am

I'll bet she can now.

neiltheblaze July 1, 2011 at 10:41 am

Behold the power of advertising!

genxr July 1, 2011 at 10:10 am

"Obama may be right but he's still a dick" is about as close as Republicans ever get to recognizing reality.

lochnessmonster July 1, 2011 at 10:11 am

What? I think this writer went to the same class as Bachmann…circular logic class.

MissusBarry July 1, 2011 at 10:12 am

I'd be willing to try being poor-rich, just to see what it's like to be rich and not able to afford a jet. Love to see stats on the average income of teatards. I suspect, by that metric, I'd be relatively super-rich. I just don't understand how they don't understand, well, anything.

nonwinner July 1, 2011 at 10:15 am

The WSJ'll be all around in the dark – it'll be everywhere. Wherever you can look – wherever there's a fight, so hedge fund managers can consider their earnings as capital gains for tax purposes, I'll be there. Wherever there's a cop beatin' up a guy, I'll be there. I'll be in the way guys yell when their effective tax rate goes up. I'll be in the way Rupert Murdoch laughs when he's hungry and he knows a virgin's bein' sacrificed for him, and when the $250,000-a-year people are eatin' bacon-wrapped filet mignon and livin' in the houses that the bank foreclosed on after gettin' bailed out – I'll be there, too.

Texan_Bulldog July 1, 2011 at 10:16 am

I like 'pulsating manhood'….

lurch394 July 1, 2011 at 10:34 am

Ah, Penthouse Forum fan!

Gaetan Dugas July 1, 2011 at 10:19 am

Barry is just showing what he'll do to wealthy people who don't contribute enough to his campaign.

This is part of the Chicago-thug style of extortion, like blowing up a neighborhood dry cleaning store to intimidate other stores to pay protection.

elviouslyqueer July 1, 2011 at 10:20 am

57 states.

ChessieNefercat July 1, 2011 at 10:37 am

World Nut daily must have given up on the idea of giving away a free "book" with subscription, and switched to giving away some really impressive drugs.*

*Replying to you, so as not to reply to idiot face.

SorosBot July 1, 2011 at 10:22 am

No, this is trying to make the rich pay a little bit closer to their fair share in taxes. It's not enough since those fucks pay way, way too little, but it's a bit anyway.

At least with "thug" it's refreshing to see that you're not even trying to hide your racism anymore, Mr. KKK. You lost, there's a black President.

Limeylizzie July 1, 2011 at 10:45 am

You are such a vile piece of work, but this latest avatar is just repulsive, what kind of person thinks that using the name of someone who died of AIDS is funny? You are a sorry cunt of a human being.

elviouslyqueer July 1, 2011 at 11:02 am

I wasn't going to go there, but thank you for this LL. I suppose this is "Noman's" latest identity, and I'm going to guess that it's doing this in "celebration" of the end of Gay Pride Month. Which is not only sad and pathetic, but it's also wrong.

Limeylizzie July 1, 2011 at 11:06 am

I have lost so many, many friends from AIDS, I will never think of it as a basis for humour.

DaSandman July 1, 2011 at 1:49 pm

Same here LL. I'm in the arts and witnessed many fine people spin off the globe.

SorosBot July 1, 2011 at 11:16 am

Spanky seems to have gone all-in with his bigotry, getting overt instead of using dogwhistles then whining about "the race card" when called on it. See also his repeated calling the Obamas' daughters "Malaria and Shariah".

imissopus July 1, 2011 at 2:39 pm

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

pause, wipe away tears of laughter, take deep breath

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Fuck Toad July 1, 2011 at 10:21 am

So Obamar wants to increase taxes on income exceeding $250,000. OK. And he also wants to get rid of a tax break for private jets, and a loophole giving hedge fund managers a huge tax break. OK. Those are three different things, Mr. Wall Street Journal. When Obamar refers to "jet owners", isn't it reasonable to assume he's referring to the part of his policy specifically addressing jets, not the part that doesn't?

Also, please stop using a $250,000 income in these discussions like it means a damn thing. If you are making $250,000 a year, and the Bush tax cut for that bracket is ended, your taxes will remain the same. The tax increase is on income over $250,000. That's how marginal income taxes work.

ChessieNefercat July 1, 2011 at 10:51 am

Liberal elitist fact nancy!

gurukalehuru July 1, 2011 at 10:22 am

Well, maybe the reason they posted a mere $250,000 profit last year was the corporate jet was listed as a business expense. Evil lying bastards.

AJWjr. July 1, 2011 at 10:29 am

Don't let the Maple Leaf fool ya, that's just spanky again. And Happy Canada Day to the real Canucks!

DashboardBuddha July 1, 2011 at 10:51 am

Ah yes…Canada Day. Flocks of Quebecois flee to Old Orchard Beach this time of year.

DaSandman July 1, 2011 at 10:30 am

People making 15,000 can't afford food or medical care. So blow me, rich people.

ChessieNefercat July 1, 2011 at 11:46 am

Be sure to charge them for it.

Limeylizzie July 1, 2011 at 10:31 am

No, not I , but clearly a denizen of The Wonkette.

Limeylizzie July 1, 2011 at 10:33 am

Thanks, I also have 2 cats, but the old mean girl cat has cast her lot more with MrLimeylizzie, so it would just be me and Neville, love dogs, dumb or otherwise and LOVE cold weather. Where are you?

ChessieNefercat July 1, 2011 at 10:49 am

Michigan's upper peninsula. Glorious scenery, spectacular fall tree color, pretty, pretty, pretty.

elviouslyqueer July 1, 2011 at 11:12 am

Pity about your wingnut governator. Any chance y'all can be "gently ceded" over to the Canucks?

ChessieNefercat July 1, 2011 at 11:43 am

Oh, that would be nice. My understanding is that there have been on-and-off mild efforts over the decades to annex to Wisconsin (which certainly makes more geographic sense) but I don't think Wisconsin has ever seen any particular benefit to Wisconsin in such a plan.

ProgressiveInga July 1, 2011 at 10:34 am

Needs moar gladiators!

genxr July 1, 2011 at 4:36 pm

Are you not entertained?!!

MinAgain July 1, 2011 at 10:35 am

What kind of moron would have a jet sitting on his desk?

lurch394 July 1, 2011 at 10:39 am

Don't try to understand 'em
Just rope, tie, and brand 'em

AJWjr. July 1, 2011 at 10:44 am

Frankie Laine ftw!

Limeylizzie July 1, 2011 at 10:40 am

Big tits?

Chet Kincaid July 4, 2011 at 4:43 pm

And did the rapturous, wandering eye
gaze upon England's mountains high?
Sweet holy Lamb of God–
They'd make a grown man cry!

I shall not cease from mental flight
until my sword sleeps in my hand,
with arrows of desire deep
in England's pink and pleasant land.

Limeylizzie July 4, 2011 at 6:13 pm

I'll show you my green and pleasant land if you show me your dark ,Satanic mills.

SaintRond July 1, 2011 at 10:42 am

Oh, fuck poor people. They're just as much of the problem as the rich – willingly compliant to the primate imperative in taking their place on the totem pole. They're the ones on the bottom while the ones on the top pound their chests and run about displaying their multi colored asses to demonstrate for all and sundry their higher social status.

Poor people are cranky and often violent. They never give you good things to eat. They're terrible in bed. They think going down on their sex partner is a sign of subservience. Meanwhile, rich people always give you good things to eat. They're gracious and have lovely manners. And they're really good in bed and will do anything sexually. I have personally seen a beautiful woman in an expensive evening dress urinate in a wine bottle after a lovely dinner for the amusement of well heeled dinner guests. What poor person would do that? No, I tell you. Poor people are repulsive!!!

Fuck poor people.

DashboardBuddha July 1, 2011 at 11:00 am

The truly rich are born free, like dolphins

AnarchyWolf July 1, 2011 at 12:31 pm

Actually much recent anthropological evidence shows that "primitive" hunter-gatherer tribal societies were very egalitarian and vastly more democratic than any modern society. If a leader arose that they didn't like they simply abandoned them, or perhaps killed them.

Hierarchy among human society rose only at the dawn of "complex" civilized society.

So if I've said it once I'll say it again, we were all better off in the neo-lithic.

prommie July 1, 2011 at 1:07 pm

When poor people socialize with another couple, and they have to drive somewhere, both men will sit in the front seats, and the women will sit in the back seat. When rich people have to drive somewhere, there will be a couple in the front seat, and a couple in the back seat. If they are really rich, they will swap spouses for the drive. This is really the most fundamental difference.

lurch394 July 1, 2011 at 1:17 pm

Paul Fussell fan, I see.

GOPCrusher July 1, 2011 at 1:36 pm

And they choose to be poor.
Fuck em, fuck em all!

neiltheblaze July 1, 2011 at 10:44 am

To answer your question – yes, America has always been this vile. Right since the founding. We started out with genocide and slavery, so our whole Karma thing is pretty damn screwed up.

Chet Kincaid July 1, 2011 at 11:41 am

But let's not be disingenous about the historical sources of "vile". (Rolls eyes toward England, France, Spain and Portugal)

neiltheblaze July 1, 2011 at 11:51 am

Yes – we came to our vileness honestly. We were grandfathered in.

Limeylizzie July 1, 2011 at 1:02 pm

Yeah, but William Wilberforce FTW!

prommie July 1, 2011 at 1:11 pm

Not just vile, vulgar too; never forget the vulgarity.

DashboardBuddha July 1, 2011 at 10:58 am

Umm…never mind. I don't mind swooning. Swooning is good.

ChessieNefercat July 1, 2011 at 11:44 am

Just imagine swooning onto the lovely tits in question.

NorthStarSpanx July 1, 2011 at 10:59 am

Clay Carter of Grisham's King of Torts would have argued (and sued) in aggrieved outrage at the Socialist President's anti-greed agenda.

AddHomonym July 1, 2011 at 11:15 am

Shorter WSJ: J-E-T-S Jets! Jets! Jets!

snarkycomments July 1, 2011 at 11:16 am

How many time must a man fall down? The answer, my friend, is blowing in the wind. The answer is blowing in the wind.

Chet Kincaid July 1, 2011 at 11:28 am

Teleprompter Malaria Sharia.

Gleem_McShineys July 1, 2011 at 2:31 pm

I love the new 2011 Poopyhead designs. So elegant.

elviouslyqueer July 1, 2011 at 11:28 am

More to the point, won't someone please think of the poor Jets?

Goonemeritus July 1, 2011 at 11:32 am

Young lady I look forward to your snark and insight as much as any Wonkette here. But between every BBC show making fat American cracks and you calling us vile I just can’t cope. Remember I still haven’t gotten over the fact that England sailed up the Hudson and burned my home town to the ground just 200 years ago.

RoPiNi July 1, 2011 at 11:34 am

Nice….anyone notice the URL still has the same title? And it will still show up in the Google as the headine. Mission accomplished.

Guppy06 July 1, 2011 at 12:00 pm

If there's anybody who knows about paying what they owe, it's the Wall Street Journal.

AnarchyWolf July 1, 2011 at 12:10 pm

Yeah, that's just responsible business practice, externalizing costs to maximize profit.

ttommyunger July 1, 2011 at 12:13 pm

If I didn't know better I might suspect the "Wall Street Fucking Journal" to owe some allegiance to "Wall Street"…….Nawwwwww!

AnarchyWolf July 1, 2011 at 12:19 pm

You have a hovel? ELITIST!

ChessieNefercat July 2, 2011 at 8:42 am

Yes, but it doesn't have a roof. We ate the thatch. The critters in it were a lovely source of protein.

ChessieNefercat July 1, 2011 at 12:21 pm

I think that covers it. Both shitheads can now go back to downfisting.

Native_of_SL_UT July 1, 2011 at 12:28 pm

Hey Contard, a single ant will soon starve to death. He needs the support of an anthill to survive. That makes him too big to fail, see.

GOPCrusher July 1, 2011 at 12:58 pm

Wasn't that in the Kathie Lee Gifford expose?

prommie July 1, 2011 at 1:01 pm

If you bring your celebrated sweater-puppies and your round heals, I have a place on the water!

Limeylizzie July 1, 2011 at 1:08 pm

I think you mean heels. There are attached as are the other items you mentioned.

prommie July 1, 2011 at 1:10 pm

I did mean heels. Did you know time wounds all heels?

OneYieldRegular July 1, 2011 at 1:11 pm

No kidding. I just calculated what I had to spend just in the last two months on flights (sardine class) for some unanticipated but necessary trips, and it actually came out to near to the upper bar of the 5-10% range of my annual income. For my next "compassion fare" flight, I'm hitting up a WSJ reader.

Lionel[redacted]Esq July 1, 2011 at 1:43 pm

Brain?

Lionel[redacted]Esq July 1, 2011 at 1:44 pm

Then they came for the Caviar, but again, I said nothing….

Gleem_McShineys July 1, 2011 at 1:54 pm

Blind? Who just slobbed out a copy-pasted FABLE which only reflects reality insofar as there are some contemporary proper nouns scattered throughout it, like corn kernels in "other media."

I wish I could be satisfied with feeling 'creative' and 'clever' by pressing a combination of two keys on my keyboard. I would probably then also be satisfied that a golden voice ringing from my AM radio or ever-glowing flatscreen provided me with all the ideals, whole, that I ever had and ever will need to believe. Ahh, it must be nice.

BlueStateLibel July 1, 2011 at 2:12 pm

WTF is the point of that? No, most people making $250,000 don't own a corporate jet–who knew? And did you know, Chris Christie can't fit into size medium men's underwear? It blows the mind.

Midway117 July 1, 2011 at 2:36 pm

But not after touching that chili — YEEOW!!

Boojum_Reborn July 1, 2011 at 2:56 pm

Serialize it.

Boojum_Reborn July 1, 2011 at 3:00 pm

Then they came for the Faberge toilets and I said nothing.

ChessieNefercat July 1, 2011 at 3:25 pm

If the DNCC promised to run that as a national ad buy during prime time from now until the first Wednesday in November 2012, I could probably be persuaded to donate to them.

genxr July 1, 2011 at 4:36 pm

I've never been to Canada but I hear it's a socialist nightmare hellscape. You have to reserve maternity beds 10 months in advance and appear in front of death panels every year for cost-benefit analysis. That's why they are massing on our border, to take our free market health care and corporate jet tax breaks all for themselfs!

finallyhappy July 1, 2011 at 4:54 pm

I volunteered during the election in a very wealthy neighborhood where the voters coming through during the morning and mid day were overdressed young women driving very expensive cars(plus those in tennis clothes coming from the nearby country club). One of them came over to me and said Obama would be taking away her money. I was wondering if it was Mommy and Daddy's money or Hubby's money

Walkinwiddaking July 1, 2011 at 5:27 pm

"Obama will try to remember not to close the tax loopholes on these peoples’ imaginary jets." Imaginary jets? Why not imaginary taxes on those imaginary jets? Hey, Frank Luntz would get some serious fucking mileage out of that message.

PuckStopsHere July 1, 2011 at 5:43 pm

Please don't. Please? (I love big tits.)

Limeylizzie July 1, 2011 at 6:00 pm

Sorry, try this instead. Again NSFW, strangely we are from the same town, must be something in the water!http://www.dpriol.com/junewilkinson157.jpg

PuckStopsHere July 1, 2011 at 6:42 pm

Jesus. Are those even legal?

Chet Kincaid July 4, 2011 at 4:08 pm

Sweet Creme Anglaise!

Beck_is_Trig July 1, 2011 at 8:41 pm

awww….poor little rich people. I remember when at an Obama Q&A a stockbroker in an aggreived tone asked the president to "stop beating up wallstreet" because obviously it was the poors and gubmints fault! (I added that last part in…but it's how every teabagger finishes any sentence…even those that don't apply to politics) It's funny the way wingnuts just key right in on that 250k figure…sort of fits my baseline views about manipulation of numbers…but anyway. Like when they group small businesses in and decry regulations against high-volume traders shorting the entire market, etc…never does anyone mention that it takes several billions of dollars to force the value of oil up 25% of its actual value…this is all about protecting us, not the Kochs! good call on the pointlessness of the story….they can't just go all out economic elitism or else those dumb hoveround legions MIGHT NOT turn out to defend the overlords.

trampndirtdown July 1, 2011 at 10:07 pm

Lolz I had to leave the hovel for work to get a couple of ameros so I could come back and anesthetize my self over the weekend.

trampndirtdown July 1, 2011 at 10:12 pm

Goony my friend you are 100% correct Clarkson is a complete ass.

SonofSpermcube July 4, 2011 at 9:59 am

Everyone who makes 250,000 dollars per year or more makes exactly 250,000 dollars.

SonofSpermcube July 4, 2011 at 10:19 am

Reminder, the WSJ published this:
http://www.brendan-nyhan.com/blog/2007/08/replica

Chet Kincaid July 1, 2011 at 10:41 am

Interesting. I don't care. Someone in that situation shouldn't "feel rich," they should "feel stupid."

V572 [SSAN] July 1, 2011 at 10:47 am

Class warrior! Trying to spread the wealth around!

Texan_Bulldog July 1, 2011 at 10:50 am

How many times have you copied and pasted that chestnut?

SorosBot July 1, 2011 at 11:01 am

Please. The rich mostly don't make their money via hard work, and it's ridiculous to claim they do. For one, most of the rich primarily make money through investments, which is not work at all; and disgustingly, investments are taxed at a lower rate than earned income, like (even more disgustingly) inheritances. Second, whether someone is rich, poor or middle class is mostly determined by luck, you idiot, primarily the luck of what class a person's parents are.

Boojum_Reborn July 1, 2011 at 12:26 pm

Post-Modern Teatard Version:

The red ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. He hates the black ants, because he has been taught to do so by the grasshoppers, who think it is fun to pit ants against each other. He believes that the black ants are trying to steal his precious munnies for socialisms.

The grasshopper thinks the red ant and the black ant are both fools and laughs and dances and plays the summer away, relying on his trust fund to pay his bills. He persuades the red ant that the problem is the black ant, and to support the elimination of a social safety net that helps all of the ants.

Come winter, the grasshopper decides he wants to jet off to the Riviera to gamble and laugh and dance. He demands that his trust fund income be tax free, even though the money has to come out of the roads and bridges that all of the ants rely on to get to work. Because the grasshopper has lots of money to spread around with politicians, they cut his taxes and allow roads and education and police and jobs to be destroyed. The ants are laid off and have to move under a bridge. They fight each other over the crumbling ruins, which crumble and fall on them, killing them both.

The grasshopper laughs and laughs and dances and sings, until the global economy crashes and he realizes that his trust fund was depleted by an unscrupulous investment banker, who was able to steal his money because of the absence of regulation, which he had supported. The grasshopper, being the idle rich, has no skills and now has no money. He dies, alone, embittered, and wishing he had paid just a little more in taxes.

GOPCrusher July 1, 2011 at 12:44 pm

Really?
This is what Right-Wing Troll has stooped too? Cutting and pasting stuff they find on the Yahoo comments section?
I blame the "No Child Left Behind" education system.

glamourdammerung July 1, 2011 at 1:00 pm

Hey BobSalem.

STILL waiting on that link for those unedited ACORN "sting" videos you claim were released.

JustPixelz July 2, 2011 at 11:24 am

In this story, am I a bug? Because in real life, I'm pixelz as can be seen by my photo.

Here's the GOP version:

The grasshopper applied for tax breaks so he could buy a private jet and migrate south for the winter. To balance the budget, the brave Repubicans cut heating subsidies to the poor who's health then deteriorated in the cold. Without adequate medical care due to budget cuts, they could not hold on to their jobs and eventually found themselves on the street. Fortunately they had the sound of jet engines flying overhead to give them hope in the future.

Dashboard_Jesus July 3, 2011 at 1:56 am

wow are you REALLY that stupid? how does a fucking moron like you get outta bed in the mornin' without injuring yourself? asshole, also

Barb July 1, 2011 at 11:10 am

Um, malaria?

Lascauxcaveman July 1, 2011 at 11:50 am

Hey, they're working on it. I hear there are pretty super-fantastic-resistant strains being conjured up near the Eritrean border. They're just kids; give them some time.

Chet Kincaid July 1, 2011 at 12:07 pm

Nancy Reid Nancy Reid! ACORN Czar. Jeremiah Sharpton. Union Thug Teleprompters!!

Native_of_SL_UT July 1, 2011 at 12:16 pm

I think the real modern version of this story is where the ant uses some of the grasshoppers saved money, invests it and gets rich and tells the grasshopper to fuck off and die.

Biel_ze_Bubba July 1, 2011 at 12:59 pm

No, the ant pisses away the grasshoppers' savings on highly leveraged toxic derivatives, and gets filthy rich on commissions and fees. THEN he tells the grasshoppers to fuck off and die.

GOPCrusher July 1, 2011 at 1:03 pm

True.
And people like Warren Buffet and Bill Gates have already stated that they think they should pay more in taxes.
It's the lackeys that work as night manager at the Motel 6 or assistant manager at J.C. Penney that will never see 250,000 in their whole miserable existence, that scream the loudest.

BobSalem July 1, 2011 at 1:54 pm

So you are still too incompetent to find it yourself so you expect someone else to do it for you….that is soooooo dumocraptic.

Hey glamourdammerung, still waiting for Obummer to share the wealth with you?

glamourdammerung July 1, 2011 at 1:59 pm

You are making excuses for not being able to back up claims you made here. Again.

You can try to insult me more if you wish, but the fact is that you and I both know you got caught telling an outright lie.

Limeylizzie July 1, 2011 at 2:01 pm

Or as a friend of mine put it so wonderfully “They left the party too soon”

BobSalem July 1, 2011 at 2:04 pm

The truly funny part of your version is the grasshoppers are the Dumocraps. You know, Obummer, Reid, Pelosi, Clintons, Huntsman, Sanders, Waters, Kerry, Rangle, et al. All the same criminals you vote for over and over. But as long as you remain faithful to your party of hate, and you remember the names Bush and Palin, you are all set taking things you don’t deserve from those that have earned them.

You will always be nothing but a puke!

Dashboard_Jesus July 3, 2011 at 2:01 am

fucking WIN, grasshopper!

BobSalem July 1, 2011 at 2:06 pm

Palin and Bush….Palin and Bush….Palin and Bush….Palin and Bush….Palin and Bush….Palin and Bush….Palin and Bush….Palin and Bush….Palin and Bush….Palin and Bush….Palin and Bush….Palin and Bush….Palin and Bush….Palin and Bush….Palin and Bush….Palin and Bush….

glamourdammerung July 1, 2011 at 2:16 pm

But as long as you remain faithful to your party of hate

Does this mean you are done getting ultra-defensive when you can not back up your outlandish claims?

Because I am still waiting for that link you claim is so easy to find, yet no search engines seem to have, of those unedited ACORN videos.

Boojum_Reborn July 1, 2011 at 2:25 pm

Is this written with a multiple choice text bot? I mean, like there are 50 stock phrases that you can throw together in your word salad shooter, irrespective of the relevance or applicability?

You don't know me. I work very hard and I'm usually in the top bracket, tax wise. However, I see the value in a stable economic and political system based on a strong middle class. I'm willing to be included in the group paying higher taxes, because it helps us get to that goal. Sorry for the lack of funny, but you sucked all the funny out of my intertubes.

Oh, and fuck you and the Cheetoh sauce your Mom puts on your Mac 'n Cheese. And fuck your Basement of Solitude and Mitch McConnell for being a turtle faced weasel.

finallyhappy July 1, 2011 at 4:47 pm

Is this supposed to make sense or are you stupid or drunk or both? I bet on both.

Dashboard_Jesus July 3, 2011 at 2:04 am

wow, what kinda drugs are you on anyway? fucking delusional moron, also too

Native_of_SL_UT July 1, 2011 at 2:41 pm

That's actually the smartest thing you have posted so far.

BobSalem July 1, 2011 at 3:17 pm

It is just too funny that people like you always claim you pay your taxes, but in the end you always support those that don’t..go figure! Remember the asshole running the IRS didn’t even pay his taxes until he was sure he was going to be nominated. Tax Law cheater writer Rangel Joins Tax Collector cheater Geithner and Former Senate Leader tax cheater Daschle in the Tax Cheaters Hall of Fame. Another cheater, Katherine Sibelius, now head of HHSV.

Just remember the words Palin and Bush.

Also, Fuck you too there asswipe!

Dashboard_Jesus July 3, 2011 at 2:07 am

ahhh, I see you have an obsession with Palin bush…that explains the mental retardation…good luck fuckin' THAT chicken Bobby

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