DICK MOVES  12:26 pm June 30, 2011

Unliked Pundit Mark Halperin Is Suspended From TV, World Happy Now

by Wonkette Jr.

No YOU'RE the dick, ya dick.Mark Halperin is that guy nobody likes who writes/jabbers about politics and Washington. In this way, he is also every pundit jabbering about Washington and politics on the cable news, but he is also especially awful. So the world rejoiced a few minutes ago when MSNBC suspended Halperin for calling Barack Obama a “dick.” This is what Halperin said, on live television: “I thought he was kind of a dick yesterday.” Well sure, everybody thinks Obama is kind of a dick, or totally a dick, but in every case “a dick,” but one cannot say this on the teevee, so good-bye forever, Mark! Video? Yes, we have video.

Joe Scarborough and his co-host, Mika what’s her name, both fall into fits of terrified giggling, with equally imaginative responses like, “Wow, wow, woah, just yeah, woah, that was, wow, oh boy,” because this is what is called “rich white people humor.” Naughty words!

But Halperin did not call Obama a Muslim, Kenyan, racist, socialist or Hitler, so technically we would call this an “elevation” of discourse.

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 177 comments }

nounverb911 June 30, 2011 at 12:27 pm

Open mouth, insert foot, get suspended, millions cheer.

ArmoredBore June 30, 2011 at 12:36 pm

Correction: Open mouth, insert foot, and KEEP IT THERE GODDAMMIT YOU PEOPLE ARE HIDEOUS AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA /STROKE

MaxUdargo June 30, 2011 at 2:52 pm

More likely: Open mouth, insert foot, get suspended, immediately receive job offer from FOX News.

FNMA June 30, 2011 at 2:52 pm

Open mouth, insert foot…but enough about Dick Morris…

WunkRocker July 1, 2011 at 8:54 am

Douchey son of Douchey Mort, is douchey. Not news. I has no snark.

Fare la Volpe June 30, 2011 at 12:28 pm

Who?

weejee June 30, 2011 at 12:54 pm

Bachmann's new campaign manager.

Negropolis June 30, 2011 at 11:45 pm

I envy you.

fuflans July 1, 2011 at 12:34 am

reading this 12 hours late, i literally had exactly the same reaction.

i don't remember and don't care who he is.

well. a dick for sure.

An_Outhouse June 30, 2011 at 12:29 pm

First its weiners, now its dicks. What will the media be discussing tomorrow? John McCain's erectile dysfunction?

Fare la Volpe June 30, 2011 at 12:31 pm

That's Bob Dole's domain, boy, and Bob Dole don't take kindly to young whippersnappers musclin' in on Bob Dole's boner money.

*hock, p'ting*

hagajim June 30, 2011 at 1:07 pm

That's what happens when the third guy in line to be Preznit is a Boehner.

DaSandman June 30, 2011 at 12:29 pm

He's was actually thinking about the President's unit on TV.

I'm down with whatever but maybe you should leave your favorites fap fantasy at home when you're at your paying gig.

Fare la Volpe June 30, 2011 at 12:47 pm

Luckily his new career in porn encourages that kind of thing.

Tundra Grifter June 30, 2011 at 12:30 pm

On the other hand, had Mr. Halprin called Mr. Obama un-American, or said that he hates America, white people and white KKKulture, he'd have his own show on Fox News by now.

AnarchyWolf June 30, 2011 at 12:34 pm

He should have chosen is words more carefully.

I mean yeah, Obama is kind of a dick who basically reneged all of his campaign promises, but you gotta phrase it carefully in all sorts of political jargon.

Its MSNBC, not an informal discussion in your apartment.

genxr June 30, 2011 at 12:30 pm

Dude, the President totally bogarted. I'm a pundit who talks like a frat boy. It's my schtick. Now let's go live to Snooki from inside the budget negotiations.

Tundra Grifter June 30, 2011 at 1:26 pm

Skip the drinks and idle conversation. Let's just go live to Snooki for some snooki.

Weenus299 June 30, 2011 at 12:30 pm

It takes one to know one.

Eve8Apples June 30, 2011 at 12:30 pm

What a bunch of pussies.

Chillwaver June 30, 2011 at 12:31 pm

Still a lot more subtle than FuxNews. Ironically enough, this will probably land Halperin a gig over there.

noodlesalad June 30, 2011 at 12:31 pm

First they came for the pundits, and I said "fuck yeah, here's 20 more you can throw in jail."

TanzbodenKoenig June 30, 2011 at 5:23 pm

Sweet! I'll start rounding up the lawyers and those people who stand too close to you in line and stuff, hopefully they're coming for them next!

WriteyWriterton June 30, 2011 at 5:41 pm

Leave us lawyers alone, dang it! (At least us excessively librul, Obama-whipped lawyers. We're good peoplez.)

Gleem_McShineys June 30, 2011 at 6:02 pm

Jail? I was kind of hoping for something a little more, you know, "traditional," and/or warmer.

An_Outhouse June 30, 2011 at 12:31 pm

Mark Halperin is a cunt.

WriteyWriterton June 30, 2011 at 5:41 pm

That is an insult to all actual cu-, oh, you know.

SorosBot June 30, 2011 at 12:32 pm

On the one hand, I can't stand Mark Halperin.

On the other, I can't stand the stupid "civility" rules our media abides by, and think pundits should be allowed to say what they really feel on air; certainly if one of the rare liberal pundits called Bush a fucking cockface during his presidency, I would be against suspending him.

On the other other hand, all the conservatives would call for that pundit to be fired, but probably will support Halperin, because they like double standards.

But ultimately, as a matter of principle, I don't think he should lose his job for this.

LowProfileinGA June 30, 2011 at 12:46 pm

He won't; he's a serious person. His day job is editor-at-large and senior political analyst for TIME. And an asshole.

mumbly_joe June 30, 2011 at 1:11 pm

Honestly, the only suspension that suspension-happy MSNBC has ever done that even comes close to this on the left was of the also-insufferable Ed Shultz, so I have mixed feelings. We've apparently finally figured out what it takes for a right-winger to get suspended on MSNBC, at least.

I think my hatred of the abject hypocrisy of shit like the Dixie Chick blacklist over saying they were embarrassed to be from the same state as Shrubya and the willingness to call Barry everything under the sun up to and including Hitler and the Anticrist, openly on the air ultimately wins out. Respect the office, or don't. Don't fucking treat the president as an object of veneration until the day after his complete, constant fuckups lose you the White House, and then start piling on.

Tundra Grifter June 30, 2011 at 2:41 pm

I'd like to give you a hand, but you've got quite a few already.

BaldarTFlagass June 30, 2011 at 12:33 pm

One man's dick is another man's presidential timber.

Chillwaver June 30, 2011 at 12:33 pm

"Go ahead, take your chance"

Not even Glenn Beck would fall for that one.

BaldarTFlagass June 30, 2011 at 12:33 pm

At least he didn't call a spade a spade. Though Fox would love to.

DaRooster June 30, 2011 at 12:34 pm

You can say… just don't show it…

Pragmatist2 June 30, 2011 at 12:36 pm

If he had just called him a "penis" he could still be on television.

JustPixelz June 30, 2011 at 12:39 pm

Or called him just a penis.

Native_of_SL_UT June 30, 2011 at 1:08 pm

What if he just called him a wiener?

CrankyLttlCamperette June 30, 2011 at 1:34 pm

What if he called him Richard?

Barb June 30, 2011 at 12:36 pm

It's a holiday weekend! Everyone should call their boss a "dick" and take the whole week off. Baconz, you go first, Sweetie.

SorosBot June 30, 2011 at 12:42 pm

Apparently a bunch of Senators are whining because Harry Reid is insisting they stay in session until the debt ceiling is dealt with instead of getting the whole week off for the 4th.

BaldarTFlagass June 30, 2011 at 12:45 pm

Damn. My immediate boss is actually NOT a dick, he's actually great to work for. Can I borrow somebody's boss to call him/her a dick?

Native_of_SL_UT June 30, 2011 at 1:17 pm

Absolutely. Do I have to give you her name or can you just say SL_UT's boss?

Doktor Zoom June 30, 2011 at 1:01 pm

ha-ha! I'm unemployed!

Limeylizzie June 30, 2011 at 1:02 pm

Ha, I'm an actress…same thing.

jus_wonderin June 30, 2011 at 1:15 pm

Lizzie, stage or screen?

I wish I had followed my dream instead of being so darn practical. By now (50) I might have been a good actor.

Oh, not that you are not practical.

Noman June 30, 2011 at 1:57 pm

Internet, even better.

Limeylizzie June 30, 2011 at 5:25 pm

Mainly Broadway, off-Broadway and regional theatre, a little TV, but as MrLimeyLizzie says, “You are too vivid for television , but Fellini would have loved you”

finallyhappy June 30, 2011 at 4:01 pm

Do you know my boyfriend, Hugh Jackman?

WriteyWriterton June 30, 2011 at 5:47 pm

So Hugh is two-timing elviouslyqueer? The cad!

LesPaultard June 30, 2011 at 1:01 pm

Mine would better classify as a c**t, but I'd never call her that, ever. Especially with paid time off starting in a couple hours.

I can hear beer calling me from my fridge already.

ManchuCandidate June 30, 2011 at 12:36 pm

Obama was being a dick and he damn well should be.

Halperin was just being a concern troll.

LowProfileinGA June 30, 2011 at 12:47 pm

Perfect!

mumbly_joe June 30, 2011 at 1:19 pm

Where "being a dick" means "being nearly a quarter as confrontational as Shrubya was on a good day". No, sorry, not seeing it. If this is Barry being a dick, he should do it waaaay more often, and also I'm not sure what words we're left with when describing Bush's constant prickishness to reporters, his boorishness around other heads of state, the eagerness of his entire administration to call their critics unamerican, or their same abject refusal to ever admit fault for anything, even when they shoot colleagues in the face.

GOPCrusher June 30, 2011 at 2:11 pm

Calling the Republiklans assholes, makes him a dick? Should have done it a lot sooner.

Nopantsmcgee June 30, 2011 at 12:38 pm

I thought Obama was a kinda dick, too. But, I celebrated that and hope he's even more dickish to the Evil Party in the coming months.

BaldarTFlagass June 30, 2011 at 12:46 pm

Really. I hope he becomes a raging hard-on; a blue-veiner, a diamond-cutter, one that a cat couldn't scratch.

GOPCrusher June 30, 2011 at 2:13 pm

I hope he drags Mitch McConnell out of the Senate chambers, whips out his dick and starts smacking him in the face with it.

MissusBarry June 30, 2011 at 6:04 pm

Ah, first mushroom-stamping reference I've seen. Well done.

Geminisunmars June 30, 2011 at 2:55 pm

I hope he is a total vein cane!

ifthethunderdontgetya June 30, 2011 at 12:38 pm

but he is also especially awful.

Bingo. Halperin is gooper whore, always has been.

His idol is the Eggman Matt Drudge.
~

DashboardBuddha June 30, 2011 at 12:44 pm

Hoo cooch a choo

Errr, goo goo g'joob.

(cultural reference fail…sorry)

Canmon June 30, 2011 at 12:38 pm

It's okay to criticize the President, but to compare him to Dick Cheney is beyond the pale.

freakishlywrong June 30, 2011 at 12:39 pm

Well, Republicans are assholes, so it stands to reason that Barry is a dick. Buttsecks them all, Barry! (He's also a loving husband and father, fuckwits).

ttommyunger June 30, 2011 at 12:40 pm

Poor Mark, always thinking about something to eat. Announcing his new position at Faux News in 3….2…..1……

Tundra Grifter June 30, 2011 at 2:41 pm

JINX!

Rotundo_ June 30, 2011 at 7:31 pm

I was thinking WaPo since Broder kicked and none of the "best and brightest" over there are getting any younger. Maybe saying "Dick" will land him a job replacing "Dick". It wouldn't be any worse than the crew they currently have.

ttommyunger June 30, 2011 at 7:37 pm

Sounds like a fit.

JustPixelz June 30, 2011 at 12:40 pm

I don't get it. I called Cheney a Dick about a billion times. No one told me not to use the "D" word.

freakishlywrong June 30, 2011 at 12:40 pm

No.

Eve8Apples June 30, 2011 at 12:40 pm

Maybe Hopey will invite them over to the White House for a "cock" tail summit.
Hopey – "You wanna dick? I'll show you a dick"

chascates June 30, 2011 at 12:40 pm

I'd call Halperin a dick but that's a part of a man.

Nothingisamiss June 30, 2011 at 1:16 pm

Ok, yes, yes, yes. 100 upfists for this.

SayItWithWookies June 30, 2011 at 12:41 pm

I'm with Greg Sargent on this — at what point in the dust storm of McCarthyite teabagging apocalyptic xenophobic brinksmanship of our current political discourse does one punish Halperin for this little pebble of stupidity? At least "I think he was being kind of a dick" is an overt expression of opinion, and not a blatantly unmoored statement expressed as fact, like "Tax cuts for the rich create jobs," or "giving adequate access to healthcare is going to turn America into the Soviet Union." MSNBC nitpicks the mote in Halperin's eye and ignores the beam in its own.

freakishlywrong June 30, 2011 at 12:48 pm

Ahhh..but MSNBC and Time also present this hack as an "impartial journalist". He is neither, and just had a partisan pop-out today on the teevee.

Eve8Apples June 30, 2011 at 12:51 pm

The MSNBC uproar over the remark will generate alot more buzz than Halperin's comment. MSNBC knows it too. It's free advertising for Morning Joe on other media outlets.

prommie June 30, 2011 at 2:28 pm

Somebody should suck this man's dick for this, he deserves it (I mean you, wookies).

riverside68 June 30, 2011 at 3:52 pm

Whose dick? Wookies? Sargent? Halperin? Obama? Eve8Apples?

All of them Katie?

KeepFnThatChicken June 30, 2011 at 3:41 pm

The difference is MSNBC and The Daily Show. This is almost as stupid as engaging in a police chase around the Four Corners Monument; 25% of the time, you're in the right jurisdiction.

riverside68 June 30, 2011 at 3:54 pm

Unless your're a Navajo cop, then you got juris-dick-tion all the way around.

Noman June 30, 2011 at 7:03 pm

Hopi and Chingachgook

Terry June 30, 2011 at 12:41 pm

“I thought he was kind of a dick yesterday.”

You mean when he said that the Republicans have to get realistic if they really want deficit reduction and taxes will have to be raised on the rich?

That's only dickish if you have a private jet and were looking forward to the tax break.

Doktor Zoom June 30, 2011 at 12:42 pm

No, Obama was finally showing a bit of backbone. Halperin, having so seldom seen that in a Democrat, mistook it for another stiff portion of the anatomy.

Cash4HoboBeans June 30, 2011 at 12:42 pm

Well, I'd rather have Obama be a dick than a pussy.

SorosBot June 30, 2011 at 12:45 pm

His apology should be, "I meant to say that Obama has a big dick, and he showed it when he tore Congress a new one."

mavenmaven June 30, 2011 at 12:45 pm

He's just lucky he didn't call him a "poopyhead" or else he would have been in REAL trouble.
Though I would have figured that a guy named Halperin would know to use "putz" or "schmuck" instead of the wasp-y "dick" .

finallyhappy June 30, 2011 at 4:03 pm

Putz really means prick- so I think that is worse than dick – a direct translation would be schlong.

tessiee June 30, 2011 at 10:47 pm

I think the connotations are slightly different.
As I've heard the words used:
A "schmuck" is a screw-up, a dumb guy who does everything wrong. Joe Biden could fairly be called a schmuck.
A "putz" is a wimpy guy who can't assert himself. Obama may not be a putz at heart, but is at least acting like a putz when he tries to be "bipartisan".
A "dick" is a nasty guy who is mean to people for no good reason. Bush the Lesser was a dick (he was also a schmuck, but I digress).

JustPixelz June 30, 2011 at 12:45 pm

Just wait'll Mike Hunt is elected President. They'll all be off the air. (Except Fox.)

freakishlywrong June 30, 2011 at 12:45 pm

Oh, and Mark? Good luck with that "access" for your next un-deserved, drooled over by idiots best seller; Game Change II

hooray4anything June 30, 2011 at 12:45 pm

Calling the President "a dick" is probably too much even for Fox. Calling him a Commie sympathizer who studied politics with Saul Alinsky and Mao Tse Tung, however, is another thing.

genxr June 30, 2011 at 12:50 pm

Don't forget his pals, the terrorists.

Goonemeritus June 30, 2011 at 12:46 pm

Many moons ago the Village Voice split the worlds population into only two camps, Assholes and Creeps. I have always found their logic unassailable. By their criteria Obama would be a Creep not a Dick I myself am a proud Creep. I hazard a guess that every Republican vying for the nomination is almost a pure Asshole.

Nothingisamiss June 30, 2011 at 1:23 pm

If you're not ideologically pure (as an asshole) you cannot win the repub primary.

powersuit June 30, 2011 at 12:47 pm

So this is the guy who started writing THE NOTE, his daily upchuck on inside-the-beltway garbage, got popular, got arrogant, ditched ABC and The Note to go be a hotshot somewhere else (where was that?) faded into oblivion because no one cared what he had to say except Karl Rove, comes back to blow hot air on Morning Joe, and now gets "suspended" for being an arrogant prick. Next stop: Politico!

genxr June 30, 2011 at 12:48 pm

He has a deep seated hatred of dick people.

hooray4anything June 30, 2011 at 12:50 pm

It goes without saying that Halperin's burst of anger at something related to politics is not actually related to anything about politics but at a perceived lack of ass-kissing the President did to the press.

Texan_Bulldog June 30, 2011 at 12:50 pm

Isn't the biggest sin that MSNBC thinks Harold Ford Jr.'s opinion counts for anything?

Alex Pareene has a great article about this saying that Mark shouldn't be fired for the 'dick' comment but because he is always WRONG about EVERYTHING. Favorite quote:

"It seems wrong, to me, that in a conversation involving Joe Scarborough and Mark Halperin, a third party was somehow called a "dick,"…."
http://www.salon.com/news/politics/war_room/2011/

freakishlywrong June 30, 2011 at 1:15 pm

Harold Ford Jr. is another one I'd like to cold punch in the cock. He is also presented on the Sunday Blows as the "liberal" or "Democrat" on the panel My ass.

horsedreamer_1 June 30, 2011 at 1:21 pm

Joe Liebermann with a light tan.

Tommmcattt June 30, 2011 at 1:39 pm

So smooth and lovely with the moca skin and almond eyes, though.

Harold, Call Me!

Negropolis June 30, 2011 at 11:52 pm

Isn't the biggest sin that MSNBC thinks Harold Ford Jr.'s opinion counts for anything?

THANK YOU!

I never liked this guy. I hate Bob Corker even more (long story), but Harold is an entitled, smug prig of the highest order.

MLHencken June 30, 2011 at 12:51 pm

This is PG Howard Stern, with politics.

Bababooey!

baconzgood June 30, 2011 at 12:54 pm

WHAT THE FUCK? I DON'T NEED TO HEAR THIS FUCKIN' SHITTY TALK COME OUT OF THIS COCK SUCKERS MOUTH! MY FUCKING BASTARD KIDS AND BITCH WERE WATCHIN' THIS FUCKING SHIT WHEN THIS HAPPENED! DOES THIS MUTHER FUCKIN' CUNT THINK HE'S IN THE COCK SUCKIN' NAVY? THIS IS PRIME FUCKIN' TIME NEWS ASSHOLE NOT YOUR FUCKIN' WHORE'S FUCK ROOM!!!!!!!!!!!!

Eve8Apples June 30, 2011 at 1:02 pm

Scarborough's holding for you on line 2. He's inviting your potty mouth to appear on tomorrow's show. He says he needs a ratings boost.

baconzgood June 30, 2011 at 1:09 pm

Seriously. I hate when fucking bitch cunts can't control thier fuckin shit hole mouth. I don't need to have a swear cock jammed into my ear pussy.

Nothingisamiss June 30, 2011 at 1:26 pm

Celebrating the weekend early, are we? MORE PLEASE.

FNMA June 30, 2011 at 1:31 pm

This is what happens when you find a stranger in the Alps.

genxr June 30, 2011 at 1:34 pm

You see what happens when you feed a stoner scrambled eggs?

genxr June 30, 2011 at 1:33 pm

Do we have the delay? We do? Okay, go ahead.

CapeClod June 30, 2011 at 12:54 pm

That's the usual reaction when someone who goes about his job in a half-assed fashion sees a person who takes a serious, disciplined approach to real problems.

littlebigdaddy June 30, 2011 at 12:57 pm

Yeah, Barry needs to be *more* of a dick. Channel LBJ, and whip it out (maybe while picking that stupid dog of his up by the ears). He is starting to learn that fear is the most important factor in his relationship with Congress. (We might have been spared all this had Barry read The Prince in college).

genxr June 30, 2011 at 1:32 pm

If he grabs Eric Cantor by the short and curlys, I will stand up and applaud.

Noman June 30, 2011 at 1:44 pm

You'd rise to the occasion?

tessiee June 30, 2011 at 10:52 pm

"We might have been spared all this had Barry read The Prince in college"

Instead of just listening to him.

KotBR June 30, 2011 at 12:58 pm

"Do we have the delay? Do we?" ('Look at me! I'm edgy!')

Way to be ballsy, you incoherent zero.

simplyblue7 June 30, 2011 at 12:58 pm

Wait, I'm confused…who's showing off their dick now?

jus_wonderin June 30, 2011 at 1:02 pm

I am sure I am original (in this thread) when I say Halpern is a dick.

LesPaultard June 30, 2011 at 1:02 pm

A dick without a heartbeat is a dildo.

V572 [SSAN] June 30, 2011 at 1:07 pm

Halperin's own dickishness is apparently hereditary:


[pappy Morton Halperin] authored the book Contemporary Military Strategy in 1967, where he defended "large-scale American bombing in South Vietnam" on the grounds that although it "may have antagonized a number of people" it nonetheless "demonstrated to these people that the Vietcong could not guarantee their security" — thus "illustrat[ing] the fact that most people tend to be motivated, not by abstract appeals, but rather by their perception of the course of action that is most likely to lead to their own personal security".

One of Halperin's famous quotes is: 'The NATO doctrine is that we will fight with conventional forces until we are losing, then we will fight with tactical weapons until we are losing, and then we will blow up the world.'


Haha, large scale bombing in South Vietnam, our fucking ally, "may have antagonized a number of people." Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke, or a Mk-82 500-pounder. You just can't get that kind of Kissingerian Realpolitik anymore.

genxr June 30, 2011 at 1:28 pm

"antagonize a number of people"

Is that what napalm, cluster bombs, and high explosives do? That doesn't sound so bad.

Gleem_McShineys June 30, 2011 at 6:27 pm

Sorry we may have antagonized all your limbs off.
If it is any consolation, most of your family members were mildly irritated instantly.

Nothingisamiss June 30, 2011 at 1:28 pm

I had no idea of this….Wonkeratti(V572), I love you.

Another legacy, unaware of his unawareness.

Chet Kincaid June 30, 2011 at 1:51 pm

The MK-82 500 Pounder is a joint venture of McDonald's and Burger King. Not a menu item, it is rather the code name for their most loyal customers.

GOPCrusher June 30, 2011 at 2:20 pm

You know what they call the MK-82 500 Pounder in France?

Chet Kincaid June 30, 2011 at 4:14 pm

La Merde au Pain?

Rotundo_ June 30, 2011 at 7:41 pm

Tourist!

tessiee June 30, 2011 at 10:55 pm

Jules, you're gonna be a bum?
No, wait; that's not right.

OkiefromTulsa June 30, 2011 at 1:09 pm

This may just be me, but I would rather be dick than a tool…

hagajim June 30, 2011 at 1:10 pm

Halperin probably just confused a backbone with the bone.

freakishlywrong June 30, 2011 at 1:10 pm

Schaden is best served freude..or..you know.

Chet Kincaid June 30, 2011 at 1:11 pm

Nothing good ever comes of that time-slot on MSNBC. For years, we were "entertained" by the slow-motion train wreck of Don Imus holding his kennel of nigger/fag/bitch/liberal-hating cast-members on a mile-long leash, while mainstream pundit regulars called in to chuckle it up and pretend to be uncomfortable, before the old bastard got his inevitable public beat-down. Now we've got insufferable Scarborough and prevaricating/plagiarizing Reagan-white-ethnic Barnicle insinuating the wingnut POV with a "reasonable and intelligent" veneer as Mika frowns and sputters uselessly, with Willie Geist covering the Kardashians in case any shallow youngsters might accidentally stumble across the program. If "dick" was really offensive to MSNBC, they would never have put this show on in the first place.

V572 [SSAN] June 30, 2011 at 1:19 pm

Why is it so easy to hate Barnicle? I can feel the anger radiating out of my head every time he opens his mouth or shows his ugly mug.

freakishlywrong June 30, 2011 at 1:19 pm

Perfection. I also love when they trot Noonan out as though she adds intellectual heft.

BaldarTFlagass June 30, 2011 at 1:20 pm

Now I'm really glad I've never watched this program.

LiveToServeYa June 30, 2011 at 1:16 pm

Nobody likes a crass-ass.

OneYieldRegular June 30, 2011 at 1:16 pm

He should really stick to writing novels for adult children. They were half-way decent, albeit, like Halperin himself, moralizing, infantilizing, and annoyingly libertarian, but at least the language occasionally had something to recommend it.

Barb June 30, 2011 at 1:19 pm

You work for a gaming company? As in making things or doing something that applies to the casino industry? My husband, Jeffery is a corporate executive over 3 casinos. Do give details, please.

jus_wonderin June 30, 2011 at 2:11 pm

Barb, I replied though email. Looks like it didn't post.

I am in the computer games biz. Been doing this for 22 years.

I am originally from (farm) Shreveport, La. We have many casinos on the Red River. I don't go much though.

FNMA June 30, 2011 at 1:19 pm

Once again, appropriately, here's Frank Booth: "Fuck you, you fucking fucks."

DarwinianDemon June 30, 2011 at 1:27 pm

If suggesting the rich pay more than their current record low taxes is dickish, Im the dickiest dick that ever dicked in this whole dickin' dick town.

Billmatic June 30, 2011 at 1:29 pm

How could you do it Mark? How could you? Coming out with stink like that poop, you poop-mouth, there's poop coming out of your mouth.

sportshort June 30, 2011 at 1:30 pm

Eh, like most of the privileged, he'll wait a week, apologize without apologizing, blame everyone else in four weeks, and in five weeks…oh look, something shiny!

Radiotherapy® June 30, 2011 at 1:36 pm

He called Obama a dick for wanting to raise taxes on the job creators….then he lost his job…hahaha.

Melissa511 June 30, 2011 at 1:38 pm

Steve Benen, as usual, gets it right:

Let me say this as plainly as I know how: Republicans are threatening to deliberately cause a global recession. The president is willing to strike a deal that leans heavily in the GOP’s direction, and Republicans are refusing. Who, in this scenario, is being dickish?

tessiee June 30, 2011 at 11:07 pm

Awhile back, I saw a political cartoon with a bunch of guys in a bar. They were watching a very stressed-looking Obama (with a cigarette burning in the ashtray), saying, "My fellow Americans, I am sorry to tell you that in ten minutes, a comet will hit the earth and wipe out all life on the planet".
The guys in the bar were all cheering, and high-fiving each other and yelling, "WOOHOO! OBAMA FAILS AGAIN!"

This pretty much sums up everything that Congress has done since January 2009.

imissopus June 30, 2011 at 1:39 pm

Sure Mark, because what's important here isn't WHAT he said, but HOW he said it. And now this will eat up the news cycle for the next 24 hours.

Taking a slightly wider view, I find it interesting/obnoxious that whenever Barry gives a press conference or speech in which he shows some feistiness (see the speech he gave in response to the Ryan budget a couple of months ago or his calling out the Citizens United decision in the SOTU) the response of the pundits and political class is to essentially call him a dick. But when he doesn't show much feistiness, they write articles about his cool-headed cerebral approach turning people off and ask why he doesn't use the presidency as a bully pulpit to communicate his positions more often.

Anybody else and the media would be giving us the approving "President Obama has decided to fight fire with fire" narrative, or "President Obama is taking the fight to Congress" or "President Obama is a lone warrior bouncing back from the disappointing midterms…will he be the next Comeback Kid?" But no, it's "How dare he lecture us?" Well shit, Bill Clinton taught law school as well and I don't recall this kind of complaining when he gave a lecture.

I really hate playing the race card, but I do wonder how much of it is a subconscious "How dare a Negro lecture us 'Mericans," even among the supposedly enlightened and educated pundits who went to Harvard like Halperin.

tessiee June 30, 2011 at 11:12 pm

"Well shit, Bill Clinton taught law school as well and I don't recall this kind of complaining when he gave a lecture."

I recall the mainstream media being up Clinton's ass for everything he did. The news was wallpapered with headlines like, "Clinton's Failed Presidency: Day 3" (OK, I may have made that up). You're probably too young to remember it.

With that said, however, I do agree that there's an ugly note underlying (and sometimes they don't even bother to make it underlying) the same kind of criticism when it's leveled at Obama, that can only be attributed to racism, although they'll *never ever* admit it. Clinton may have been "slick Willie", or whatever their damn problem was with him, but at least they weren't calling him "uppity".

mumbly_joe June 30, 2011 at 1:43 pm

Meh, Halperin will be back before you know it. It's not like he pointed out the hypocrisy of Joe presuming a sitting congressman was a murderer because he was romantically linked to a dead staffer, or anything like that.

Tommmcattt June 30, 2011 at 1:48 pm

Hey, the Gimp is back out of his box, doing the downfist.

Fists up for you all! Except for you, Gimp, you get the hose.

Tommmcattt June 30, 2011 at 2:08 pm

The only thing you'll get out of this hose is composed of mostly water, with organic solutes including urea, creatinine, uric acid, and trace amounts of enzymes, carbohydrates, hormones, fatty acids, pigments, and mucins, and inorganic ions such as sodium (Na+), potassium (K+), chloride (Cl-), magnesium (Mg2+), calcium (Ca2+), ammonium (NH4+), sulfates (SO42-), and phosphates (e.g., PO43-).

Lap it up, Gimp-boy!

neiltheblaze June 30, 2011 at 2:16 pm

That's pretty much true – but Barnacle does it with a particular form of fake blue-collar preening that's particularly loathsome. He used to be a writer for the Boston Globe, so I was exposed every few days to his faux populist everyman crap for years before he got his second chance on TV (after his little plagiarism kerfuffle) – so my animus is of long standing in his case. He's such a….dick!

DemonicRage June 30, 2011 at 2:18 pm

That show only rocks when Joe Scarborough is reminiscing about his years in the House of Representatives. Everything else on the 4 hours or so of random chat is a total waste. Also good when Scarborough crinkles his nose, smiles, and turns around any criticism made of Conservatives by saying something disparaging about Liberals. Such a rewarding investment of time watching that show!

donner_froh June 30, 2011 at 2:25 pm

Halperin's second take–"the President was posturing" went perfectly with "the President was a dick."

Put them together and he would have a posturing dick–not unlike Anthony Weiner. Halperin must not be able to get those images out of his mind.

Bigger than Rod June 30, 2011 at 2:31 pm

All this fuss over a dick which we can't even see in a photo! What's the point of having a male dominated society if daddy can't whip it out once in a while to keep the help in check?

FNMA June 30, 2011 at 3:03 pm

I think she prefers to be called "special."

deanbooth June 30, 2011 at 3:03 pm

My son and probably 27 other Wonkette childrens want a job testing games. Any openings?

__kth__ June 30, 2011 at 3:18 pm

Assuming Halperin speaks for the Gang of 500, which I don't doubt in the slightest, apparently if you respond to the Republicans with anything but a fetal crouch as they kick you in the kidneys, you're a dick. If so, then we might as well give the teabaggers the keys to this country and let them drive it off a cliff. Some days, that sounds like poetic justice to me.

BaldarTFlagass June 30, 2011 at 3:41 pm

Our President has shrinkaged!!

sati_demise June 30, 2011 at 3:48 pm

Oh, of course the President has to re-frame the debate.

The Repulicans dont have to do a damn thing?

NotMother June 30, 2011 at 4:22 pm

Quick…change it in Wikipedia!

TanzbodenKoenig June 30, 2011 at 5:24 pm

Sounds like somebody's got a case of the Mondays…

WriteyWriterton June 30, 2011 at 5:45 pm

Steve Benen and Greg Sargent got this right: this remark is a misdemeanor. It's all the utterly lazy fictitious equivalence-peddling and Kenyan/muslin/birther/socializm/fact-free/don't challenge-Boehner-Cantor-McConnell-on-their-lies- stuff that warrants the public floggings. THAT'S the felony.

WriteyWriterton June 30, 2011 at 5:46 pm

No. Not bloody ever.

Limeylizzie June 30, 2011 at 6:39 pm

Barry was pissed, apparently.
http://tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com/2011/06/carney

__kth__ June 30, 2011 at 7:12 pm

Fox News wouldn't call Obama a dick. They would merely have a big chyron that asked "IS OBAMA A DICK?", because it's out there.

Gleem_McShineys June 30, 2011 at 7:27 pm

In 2009, Let me stop you right there, Daily Caller.

1.3 million minutes of airtime have passed since then, and during all that time, nobody, not a single pundit, called the President of the United States a dick.

In that minute or so, a million-ish broadcast minutes ago, they also weren't calling the Tea Party movement a dick.

Look, if you expect anyone to believe that anyone could still be butthurt about something 'borderline-inappropriate' that happened in 2009, you might want to buy some serious industrial-strength anus aspirin, 'cause this is going to hurt:

Seriously, fuck off you hypersensitive little cunts. Shut the fuck up. Only whiny little tittybabies like yourself have the need to come up with some kind of fucking 'equivalency' that 'somehow' excuses some shitty thing one of 'your team' is caught dead-to-rights doing. I say 'somehow' because it only holds water with your own smug asshole pundit/parrot club. Seriously. Quit with the false equivalency shit, it's the most pathetically crap kind of rationalization, ever.

How's that for borderline-inappropriate? You gonna put it down in your little notebook? YOU GONNA CRY NOW, DAILY CALLER??

OneYieldRegular June 30, 2011 at 7:34 pm

To tell the truth, I've only been able to read him Palin-style – quitting half way through the two books I tried, so when I said they were "half-way decent" I meant that literally.

gullywompr June 30, 2011 at 9:43 pm

It shrinks?

tessiee June 30, 2011 at 9:49 pm

They'll find a way to blame Weiner for this, you wait and see if they don't.

tessiee June 30, 2011 at 10:49 pm

So, when Fox puts (D) after someone's name, it's a veiled way of calling them a dick?

tessiee June 30, 2011 at 10:59 pm

"sucked off every fucking mule in a mile-long mule train"
*points*
Look, prommie! An unattended bottle of Jack Daniel's!
*steals perfect phrase while prommie is distracted*

tessiee June 30, 2011 at 11:01 pm

"Chris Matthews has made outrageous statements including saying the country should “put Exxon signs up over Arlington Cemetery” and has also alleged tokenism from the Bush administration by calling former Secretaries of State Condoleezza Rice and Colin Powell “showcase appointment[s].” And former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin has also been a target – calling her “profoundly stupid,” “a dolt,” and an “empty head,” all having gone unpunished."

Chris Matthews said that?
The guy whose hair looks like a lemon ice?
AND he got away with it?
I like him slightly better than I did five minutes ago.

Negropolis June 30, 2011 at 11:39 pm

I've always hated Halperin with a burning passion, so this makes me happy. It's not his politics – I think he politics are whoever happens to be paying him any one minute -, it's that he's a total and utter representation of the Beltway press. He is just plain awful. Smug, duplicitous…he is every single thing that's wrong with the press. Him and John Heilmann or however in the hell you spell it. Oh, and fish-faced Dana Milbank. Gawd, I can't wait until they are ignored and just go away.

Negropolis July 1, 2011 at 12:00 am

Honestly, Rachel is the only thing they've got left. I was not surprised to hear that he's was one of the few shows that have gained viewers over the last monhts. I even liked Olbermann, well, at least his show, and that is all that mattered.

The rest of them are too self-serious or just plain poseurs or both.

Tundra Grifter July 1, 2011 at 10:41 am

Off-the-Mark Levin calls people "schmucks" several times a show and nothing happens.

Is that because no one is listening?

TanzbodenKoenig June 30, 2011 at 5:26 pm

Spoken like a true basement dwelling mouth breather… At least when that mouth is not full of Koch and balls

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