ONE EMPTY SUIT IS ENOUGH  1:17 pm June 21, 2011

Some Guy Wants NBC Anchorman Brian Williams To Run For President For Some Reason

by Wonkette Jr.

Is it already time for people to launch pointless “Draft Random Celebrity” presidential nonsense efforts, yet? Nope, not really — it’s still more than a year away from when “regular folks” start noticing it’s a presidential campaign season. But, whatever, somebody has already done it, so here’s a link to this thing saying Brian Williams should run for president.

And it is unnecessary, as we already have some script-reading anchorman in an anchorman suit with anchorman helmet hair: Mitt Romney.


Hola wonkerados.

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Barb June 21, 2011 at 1:21 pm

"five, six, five, seven…." The adorable little girl cannot count and even she knows that wine coolers will get you drunk and that boy and girl sleepovers result in sexy time.

Gratuitous World June 21, 2011 at 1:21 pm

i don't know. Williams has a pretty steady 9 to 5 job making cameos on America's sitcoms.

Sue4466 June 21, 2011 at 1:22 pm

Being that he works for NBC (aka the lame stream media), wouldn't Brian Williams have to run in a Socialist/Democratic primary first?

chascates June 21, 2011 at 1:24 pm

The only worthwhile network news anchors are from Canada and aren't eligible to run.

HistoriCat June 21, 2011 at 2:38 pm

I'm pulling for Kent Brockman, even if he is a Fox employee.

4TheTurnstiles June 21, 2011 at 1:24 pm

Your move, Katie "all of 'em" Couric

PsycWench June 21, 2011 at 1:26 pm

He may be the only candidate who has made an appearance on Sesame Street. He's Big Bird-approved.

Mumbletypeg June 21, 2011 at 1:26 pm

we already have some script-reading anchorman with anchorman helmet hair: Mitt Romney

Ken, in case you missed the last thread: Mitt [IMO] is about to get schooled by his brother from another Mormon mother.
Although if Williams is as serious about running as his fan-page developer is, he'll probably get my vote. Why not? In another era I would've gone with Pat Paulsen.

horsedreamer_1 June 21, 2011 at 1:29 pm

Sure, Schwarzenegger cannot run — & kind of made a mess of California, & his household, besides — but we have plenty of domestic action stars who are up for the challenge (Norris, Stallone, Willis). &, I mean, it worked out so well for The Philippines. So, no need for a newsman, yet.

SpurningBeer June 21, 2011 at 1:30 pm

Is America ready for a president with facial asymmetry?

GuyClinch June 21, 2011 at 1:40 pm


freakishlywrong June 21, 2011 at 1:32 pm

He cocks his head. Always. Cocky cocked head. Cocked. It makes me crazy. (And horny!).

natoslug June 21, 2011 at 2:37 pm

For those with cocky cocked heads, I present the perfect wedding dress:

baconzgood June 21, 2011 at 3:02 pm

…..I'm sorry I got nothin'……

ManchuCandidate June 21, 2011 at 1:33 pm

It's brilliant idea. It worked out great for US America the last time a guy from TV became the preznit. Just great.

EatsBabyDingos June 21, 2011 at 1:35 pm

True story: Tom Brokaw and my Dad were just out of the Korean War working radio out in the midwest together. Brokaw gets an offer to do some new crazy stuff called "evening news" at a television station, and he tries to get Dad to join him. Dad tells him he's nuts to give up the $40 a week job, and anyway, Dad just got a job with the ol' USDofA as an ag extension agent making $46 a week, and was getting to move to Anamosa, Iowa. Dad became the head of 4-H; Tom is now "unemployed," if you get my drift, and probably grifting in Alaska

elviouslyqueer June 21, 2011 at 1:37 pm

Meh. Needs moar fapping and less blowing shit up.

deanbooth June 21, 2011 at 1:39 pm

Do not want!

Williams: "I do listen to Rush. I listen to it from a radio in my office, or depending on my day, if I'm in the car, I will listen to Rush. And he will tell you I've been listening for years. I think it's my duty to listen to Rush. I think Rush has actually yet to get the credit he is due, because his audience for so many years felt they were in the wilderness of this country. No one was talking to them."

hagajim June 21, 2011 at 1:40 pm

We have 2 anchormen running what with Huntsman in.

Come here a minute June 21, 2011 at 1:43 pm

They should be drafting Dan Rather — he's just nutty enough to go along with it.

Kenneth, the frequency is 2012!

SexySmurf June 21, 2011 at 1:46 pm

I know it's not popular to say but I disagree with his dropping nuclear bombs on little girls platform.

Lionel[redacted]Esq June 21, 2011 at 2:05 pm

What's next. Are you against bombing the browns? What sort of anti-American commie Muslim are you?

hooray4anything June 21, 2011 at 2:24 pm

The big question, though, is if Brian Williams believes it would be fair to give her and all the other people affected by the nuclear blast disaster funding

Lionel[redacted]Esq June 21, 2011 at 2:44 pm

But if we did that, where would get money for our bombs?

hooray4anything June 21, 2011 at 3:14 pm

cutting the capital gains tax, duh.

FlipOffResearch June 21, 2011 at 1:47 pm

Imagine the look of terror in his eyes when the debate moderator asks him "What's the frequency Kenneth?"

BarackMyWorld June 21, 2011 at 1:47 pm

I just got a great idea for a sequel to "Anchorman" that involves Ron Burgundy running for office in the early 1980s.

horsedreamer_1 June 21, 2011 at 2:12 pm

Sounds like Bulworth.

deanbooth June 21, 2011 at 1:54 pm

Doesn't he know that anchormen have anchor babies?

SayItWithWookies June 21, 2011 at 1:55 pm

We're only moments away from Draft That Guy in a Suit I Saw Yesterday Who Looked Statesmanlike and Would Probably Know What to Do if He Were in Charge 2012.

Tommmcattt June 21, 2011 at 1:59 pm

I'm saving all my votes for Tosh.

nounverb911 June 21, 2011 at 2:09 pm

Which version?

Monsieur_Grumpe June 21, 2011 at 2:10 pm

Peter Tosh I hope.

MLHencken June 21, 2011 at 2:25 pm

Get up, stand up.

Lionel[redacted]Esq June 21, 2011 at 1:59 pm

Unless he twitters pictures of his genitalia, how can we take him seriously as a politician?

Tommmcattt June 21, 2011 at 2:19 pm

Brian Williams, show us your junk!!!!!

bumfug June 21, 2011 at 2:01 pm

I'm just glad they didn't go digging around for her and find that she's a teabagger like Mo Tucker, the Velvet Underground drummer.

SenileAgitation June 21, 2011 at 3:10 pm

Say what?

Native_of_SL_UT June 21, 2011 at 2:10 pm

I'm inspired!
I think I will start taking contributions for my new "Recruit William Shatner 2012" campaign.

hooray4anything June 21, 2011 at 2:23 pm

slow golf clap

SorosBot June 21, 2011 at 2:25 pm

If we're going to just pick random TV news people as President, there's only one who'd actually be a good choice; you all know who it is, she'd be both our first woman and our first out gay president.

SexySmurf June 21, 2011 at 2:38 pm


LowProfileinGA June 21, 2011 at 6:15 pm

I know! I know! Call on me!

OkieDokieDog June 21, 2011 at 2:32 pm

Maybe he can get that cheeky monkey from BBC World News America, Matt Frei as his running mate. Bonus! He was born in West Germany.

WABishop June 21, 2011 at 2:34 pm

Imagine an age where the public schools were so good a child wasn't predisposed to count wrong!

neiltheblaze June 21, 2011 at 2:50 pm

Brian Williams is bland and intellectually bereft enough to be a candidate for president.

Besides, doesn't Rick Perry have the hair-sprayed mannequin vote all sewn up?

Steverino247 June 21, 2011 at 3:10 pm

Nah, you could never get Ernie to stop masturbating long enough to actually campaign.

horsedreamer_1 June 21, 2011 at 3:52 pm

1992:James Stockdale yelps, "Gridlock!"::2012:Ernest Borgnine shoots video for Meatspin.

horsedreamer_1 June 21, 2011 at 3:51 pm


edywin2 June 21, 2011 at 4:09 pm

Chelsea Handler in 2012! Attitude and boobies rule!

ttommyunger June 21, 2011 at 7:27 pm

Maybe Jon Stewart would be his running "Mate" (Heh, heh). They seem to really get on when Brian makes one of his frequent visits to "The Daily Show". That would be a good fit Religion-wise, a Jew and a Brian Williams worshipper.

FlownOver June 21, 2011 at 9:40 pm

Is that a slam on Obama?

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