Obama Campaign's New Contest: You Could Win a Plate of Food

Times are tough and getting significantly tougher, so it's a challenge for the Obama campaign to come up with some fundraising stunts that will attract any attention in these desperate, weird times. He could put his dong on Twitter, we suppose, but that's not exactly the right kind of attention. What the Barack Obama campaign machine needs is some kind ofaspirationalmessage, perhaps something along the lines of "Hope" and "Change" but without the actual emotion of Hope or the prospect of actual Change. Oh, we know! Have a contest, and the winner gets a plate of food.

This is the email currently going out to tens of millions of voters who foolishly signed up for Obama '08 campaign updates and are now assaulted by a never-ending, unstoppable, un-unsubscribeable torrent of spam:

Truck --

I've worked for President Obama for almost five years -- but I've never actually sat down for dinner with him.

That's why I'm excited about (and maybe a little jealous of) the opportunity you have to join the President for dinner. He's going to sit down and swap stories over a meal with four supporters, and you could be one of them.

You should really give this a shot. Donate $10 or more today to be automatically entered for the chance to sit down for dinner with the President.

On the one hand, $10 would actually buy a plate of food without having to sit down with goddamned Obama. On theotherhand, you could simply steal a credit card, "donate" to Obama, and long after the bogus charge is canceled you will still have a shot of getting a plate of food. And maybe while Obama is telling lies in the other direction, you can steal his diamond Rolex that he picked out of a carton of diamond Rolexes sent to him each day by Goldman Sachs.