American Capitalism is still kind of fun, once in a while! Spirit Airlines emailed customers this offer with the subject line, “Want To See Our Weiner?” and miraculously this did not end up in everyone’s spam folder. The Weiner-themed marketing ploys were probably going to be inevitable, so congratulations, Spirit Airlines, for making it out ahead of the curve on this one. [Spirit Airlines via Wonkette operative "Jon C."]
{ 142 comments }
Their original ad copy was a litle more straight forward:
"Ride a hard one to Orlando"
Now if they offer a fish taco for my weiner, they have a new customer for life.
I'll bet the pilot's name is Dick Johnson.
Peter Dangle?
Rod Van Cucumber?
Rooster Cogburn.
Cockburn?
Roger Soundly?
They have one of those inflatable automatic pilots.
you called?
Infellatable?
long rod von hugendong?
And I would have thought it was Big Johnson, who is a known favorite.
Clarence Oveur.
P. Ness Bolger is what I think you heard.
I hear they've been hiring Chinese crews for their Asian routes. Long Wang and Hung Well were the pilot and co- from my last trip to Hong Kong.
Hung Far Low, Portland, Oregon
Today, we are all consumers of jet fuel and pig asses.
Leave Sarah alone!
Hey, I only eat all-beef weiners, not fair!
I may never eat another hot dog again. Thanks, Anthony!
Didn't Delta already run this ad campaign?
…yeah, and you thought it was rain!
"…got you covered like a jimmy hat."
You f'in to raise up and get your travel on?
http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=520_1177709069
Wut is this? Please tell me something that will make me feel less bad about laughing aloud at this.
Weiner mit schlag or GTFO.
…und spargel. Vergessen sie nicht die spargel.
What the heck do Weiners have to do with airline fares?
They're going DOWN, this week only!
Well, if you think about it, airliners are essentially long tubes filled with meat.
I don't know about airline fares, but have you heard what they have in common with submarines?
[snark off] I'm with you, Bucky. It's not a great ad. Sure, it's fine if you want to make people laugh, but an ad is mostly supposed to make you want to buy the product or service. Which airline should we fly? Haha, these guys have the funniest ads, let's fly with them! Haha! Ha, ha, ah …. no.
For something fraught with seriousness as airline travel is today, it's a lousy approach.
[snark on] Our planes have TruckNutz! And weiners! Penis!
I don't know. Spirit seems to be doing just fine, and it doesn't have much to do with the ads, either way. Discount airlines can do this.
Why waste money on the ads? Throw out the hot dog stuff and just say "We're the Cheapest." Over and over again.
And the baggage is free!
The baggage will be with you for the rest of your career!
Career? As a dog catcher?
Carry on any sack with nuts for free!
No Catsup or Mustard packets though…
And seating in coach is as tight as a pussy!
Depends on the, well, nevermind.
Today, we are all Weiners.
~
I see that our Troll has finished his Wikipedia history revisions and is in our neighborhood.
Ok… Which one of you Wonketteers wrote that ad? Time to fess up.
Nothing new here, in my goon duties I have flown up to 350,000 miles in one year. Airlines have given me the Weiner every one of those miles without common decency of a reach around.
350,000 weiners has got to be some kind of a record, but I don't want to think about it anymore.
You don't mind if I don't shake your hand?
You know who else offered weiner discounts?
That's right…
Weiner, Wiemar, whatever.
That is just NOT kosher.
What if it's Heblew National?
the Blue Angel?
I would expect any direct marketing companies that specialize in the Porn industry are now inquiring with Spirit Airlines about potential consulting.
Anthony Weiner better be getting a piece of this craze. Feed the weiner!
This is better than the time they invited everyone to ride the red rocket.
But is the weiner cream-filled?
It's filled with a special sauce.
They should offer a special rate to Las Vegas so a certain congressperson can choke a bitch.
Nice buns.
Yes, though it's considered rude if you do it after your complimentary blowjob.
does that take place in the cockpit?
Timmy, do you like gladiator movies?
lol. and i was just thinking to myself: "well, it's better than Amtrak where Joe Biden often asks the other passengers if they've been in the caboose."
Captain Oveur: You ever been in a cockpit before?
Joey: No sir, I've never been up in a plane before.
Captain Oveur: You ever seen a grown man naked?
is monstrous modifying weiner or discounts?
Yes.
WIN
The "Depends" people missed a marketing opportunity during Vitter's scandal. Bet they're kicking themselves now.
or shitting themselves…
Coffee, tea, or PENIS?
Well, Ken, looks like somebody picked the wrong day to quit Wonkette. Where are you gonna put those anusburger jokes now?
Does this company seriously want to be known as 'Weiner Airlines'? Because that's whats going to happen.
Well, the image sticks with you, you know? Unlike… you know, that other airline. That got bought by the bigger airline?
While this example is not, strictly speaking, "journalism", I note that in this incident j-school rules are being thrown in the gutter and danced upon. My editor-of-a-big-paper friend tells me that name-puns (see Tom: "Justice DeLayed", for example) are a no-no in newsheadlinewriting. And probably my friend is, himself, eschewing them even with the Weiner Thing, because he is serious man (well, about newswriting and whatnot, that is). Other newspapers? Har, har, har.
There is a joke there involving "eschew", but I am too drunk to make it.
OT, but while speaking of wieners…
In
HardonHardin, Tejas, which is outside of Houston, the constabulary uncovered a mass grave with 25-30 dismembered bodies. Do y'all think these are whistleblowers who talked to Austin DA Ronnie Earl about Tom Delay (this ain't far from Sugarland kids) or are they from early skirmishes between Rick Perry and Ron Paul Prez 2012 supporters? Tejas just can't stand to take a backseat to Arizona on community violence now can they?No actual bodies found; this is apparently a false alarm caused by a tip from a "psychic."
http://www.businessinsider.com/psychic-sends-poli…
LM, there seems to be a lot of contradictories on the official body of information, so to speak. Mehbe this is a Tejas take on 3-card Monte, but with body parts.
Where's
WaldoDismembero(s)?Seriously, who fucking cares? The more Texans who die, the better. That place needs to be cleared out by inauguration day 2012, when Barry sells the whole kit and kaboodle back to Messico.
That's what I heard.
Total bullshit–must have been a slow psychic day.
Or a slow-Texas-lawmakers day.
Nah, those guys are slow every day.
Doez this mean we should not listen to those who read tea leaves?
I had a cool screed about illegals maps rednecks and beauty queens for a reply, but being filled with ennui from Ken's earlier post I just thought fuck it.
Now I can't get this out of my head:
Frank Sinatra-Come Fly With Me http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_j1KGHOvSkM
No, I do not want to see their viral twitter campaign.
By 'eachway' and 'roundtrip' they mean anal.
a stop-over is a 'reacharound'
Goddammit, a "weiner" (Pronounced VINER) is someone who makes wine. Also, a lying scumbag that you used to really like. A "wiener" is a mild-flavored, long, thin sausage commonly use in hot dog sandwiches.
Ha ha. You said "viner"
And 'hot dog sandwich'!
A veiny wiener?
Yes, as someone who understands proper pronunciation of German words, I've always thought this guy was a total asshole for mispronouncing HIS OWN GODDAMN NAME.
He wouldn't be the only one. He wouldn't be the only American to Anglicize his name. It's been the American Way since before the founding of the country. It's my we have a Lima, Ohio, and a Milan, Michigan both pronounced with a long "I". Get used to it. If he did insist that we pronounce it "viner", I'd be worried.
You've been awfully serious, lately.
Really? Sorry, I hadn't noticed. Must be my difficult situation at work, or something. Labor problems again, and instead of my usual 60 hr/wk I'm back up to 75.
Buttsecks.
The TSA is going to be very busy with all this junk.
Too much junk male.
Baggage, mon ami; baggage.
The skies are getting a little too friendly for my taste.
Oh come on you old goat, of course you remember, as do I, the years of wink-and-nod "Fly with us and you can fingerbang this coquettish stewardess" advertising.
Coffee, tea, or me?
THAT'S the one! I couldn't for the life of me remember it.
Oh, oops. That must have gotten so ingrained in my little skull that I assumed it was an actual ad. Dang, so that's what pernicious means.
Fly me.
Yes, but as YOU recall, male stewardii were being introduced into the employee stream at that time.
Bankrupted by cabin crew's sexual harassment class action in 3, 2…
Which gender is filing?
All of them Katie.
When the airline had a sale called "you'll love our double DD's" the passengers kept asking the flight attendants to flash them. Spirit is so very classy.
No way I'm paying nine bucks for a hot dog. Fucking airlines.
How about if the flight crew plays a game of baseball while you eat it? Then, maybe?
Typical. But would they do something snarky with diapers or men's room sex or dirty text messages to underage boys or Governor Boink-inator? Nooooooo…….
Sen. Richard Penis (D-South Dickota) is not amused.
We really move our tail for you!
Worth watching just for the 70s hair.
UPDATE: Get a life, Fister Roboto.
This never would've happened in the Johnson administration.
LBJ sounds like something a Mexican hooker does.
Cut-off date is June 10.
As a professional travel agent (yes really, you scalliwagamuffins) it was my responsibility to disclose important restrictions. We got the email in our "official" inbox, where it and its comical subject line got roundfiled.
But not before we all had a good laugh. Har de har.
Owwww,
I didn't see anything about no cut-off date. Damm, them is some hard earned miles!
Unfortunately this weiner is a long haul without relish. And at the end of it, you're met by an angry ex-aide to Hillary Clinton. If Rep. Weiner had thought about that for a minute he wouldn't be in this situation.
Weiner is a little too into this "I've been a bad boy" routine for my taste.
I am beginning to think he is right where he put himself, and he feels all warm and wet.
Wonkette seems to not only not inspire hope anymore, but also not viewing or posting. Ah fuck, too many double negatives. There it is.
There's an old blues song from the 20's called "Please Warm my Wiener." I'm pasting the lyrics here.
"I got somethin' to tell ya baby, don't get mad this time,
If you warm my weiner
You give me ease all up in my mind
Baby, please warm my wiener, oh, warm my wiener,
Won't you just warm my wiener, 'cause he really don't feel right cold
Now listen here, sweet baby, i ain't no lyin' man,
If you warm my wiener one time, you gonna want him again
Baby, please warm my wiener, oh, warm my wiener,
Won't you just warm my wiener, 'cause he really don't feel right cold
Said some says it takes hot water, baby, can't you see,
But your heat, baby's, plenty warm enough for me
Baby, please warm my wiener, oh, warm my wiener,
Won't you just warm my wiener, 'cause he really don't feel right cold
Now listen here sweet baby, it ain't no fake,
I'm beggin' you baby, now just give your daddy one break
Baby, please warm my wiener, oh, warm my wiener,
Won't you just warm my wiener, 'cause he really don't feel right cold
Now listen here, sweet baby, you know the time's growin' old,
I don't want you to warm half of my wiener, i want you to warm him all
Baby, please warm my wiener, oh, warm my wiener,
Won't you just warm my wiener, 'cause he really don't feel right cold…"
Now, with that I would say we've all had just about enough wiener to last a lifetime. Now let's just fucking drop it. Peace… God bless…
Spirit has become kind of known for this in the last few years. I like creative ads; sometimes, even the ones that beat you over the head with their over-the-top, not-so-subtle humor. Hard, each way, roundtrip…oh God; it really does get better.
Wanna' see a weiner show, y'all?
BTW, we're going to need some Plane Nutz.
Nothin' plane about my nutz…
(For Bot)
And, for that, you get some p-nuts.
Yes, you are expected to tip, but you can always just give them the shaft…
Try the veal; I'll be here all night.
FTW
Thumbs up all around.
I see all these Weiner jokes are making our p-ness bigger.
EDIT: No thanks to Fisty McTroller.
"Weeping Weiners, Batman!!"
Don't they have antibiotics for that?
Spirit or Swallow?
Am I the only one to notice that the tips of the two Spirit's weiners are, um, different?
One of em looks Muslin.
In what respect, Charlie?
The only problem with this deal is that Spirit only flies to terrible places and the planes wreck a lot.
pickey pickey
Sometimes a hot dog is just a cigar.
THIS is more scandalous than Weiner's actual "sex scandal."
And the bean bags for it to sit in.
Well, they do always ask which seat you want…
Did anyone notice that bun has 2 weiners in it?
Kinky…
flies outta New York state…
If you try to book a flight during blackout dates, are you cockblocked?
Comments on this entry are closed.