SWAMP GAS MONSTERS  1:26 pm June 6, 2011

Florida Now So Corrupt FBI Taking Out Newspaper Ads Seeking Tips

by Wonkette Jr.

America’s favorite swamp-gas-filled purgatory, the state of Florida, is now so corrupt that the FBI is taking out ads calling on citizens to report all of their dishonest politicians. Florida is the number one state in corruption, with over 800 politicians arrested between 1997 and 2007. Oh hey, isn’t the year 2000 somewhere between those years? Probably! The FBI is concerned that some of the state’s elected representatives think that federal stimulus dollars are free handouts for them and their families. But come on, those guys work hard, right? Just look at the important legislation they’re passing, trying to make sure those welfare queens aren’t running around using their free handouts to buy drugs. You are only allowed to buy rich people things with free government handouts.

Legislators trying to introduce two separate ethics bills have so far seen them die in committee this year.

From the Orlando Sentinel:

Few legislators wanted to crack down on public officials betraying the public trust. And the excuses were downright laughable.

State Sen. Gary Siplin, D-Orlando, argued that if we criminalize more political misdeeds, it might crowd the prisons.

Siplin, who was himself tried on felony charges that he robbed taxpayers of thousands of dollars, has a pretty good point. [Orlando Sentinel]

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 159 comments }

nounverb911 June 6, 2011 at 1:29 pm

It's all Jeb Bush's fault.

charlesdegoal June 6, 2011 at 1:37 pm

It goes back a lot farther than that. Perhaps not to Ponce de Leon, but at least to Hemingway.

OneDollarJuana June 6, 2011 at 2:56 pm

It's the Cubans' fault. Hemingway included (he was a Cuban for a while, after all). Didn't Castro empty his prisons onto innertubes and send them our way a few years back? Clearly, we didn't catch all the ladrones and put them in jail. Some of 'em musta got elected to office in Fla.

AJWjr. June 6, 2011 at 1:30 pm

Is rick scott a politician?

SpurningBeer June 6, 2011 at 2:10 pm

Politics is a sideline, when the Medicare fraud slows down.

AJWjr. June 6, 2011 at 2:32 pm

Bingo.

bumfug June 6, 2011 at 1:31 pm

Thank god they have Rick Scott in there now to straighten this mess out. Move along, nothing to see here.

Lascauxcaveman June 6, 2011 at 1:31 pm

State Sen. Gary Siplin, D-Orlando, argued that if we criminalize more political misdeeds, it might crowd the prisons.

Solution: Declare all state office buildings to be state prisons.

You're welcome, FLA.

user-of-owls June 6, 2011 at 1:44 pm

It is a wrongem boyo.

PRIVATE prisons.

Lascauxcaveman June 6, 2011 at 2:23 pm

I knew that working together, our brilliant minds could come up with a solution that PAYS FOR ITSELF. Just like Tax Cuts.

(All you sub-100-p commenters, pay attention. This is how you reach the diamond elite.)

user-of-owls June 6, 2011 at 2:55 pm

That's a splendid new smoking jacket you're wearing old chap. Saw you sporting at the club the other day. I say, another Armagnac to go with our Cohiba Piramides? That's the stuff, bully!

Where is that blast sub-100-p boy when you need him?

Geminisunmars June 6, 2011 at 3:04 pm

P-p-p-puhleeze, Sir, may I have another?

BerkeleyBear June 6, 2011 at 3:38 pm

Trying to bring the funny, boss. Sorry I was a missin, boss. Can I shake a leg now, boss?

BerkeleyBear June 6, 2011 at 3:43 pm

Speaking as one stuck on 90 something for months now (after the great P purge that has never been fully explained) thank you for this amazing insight. Tell me again about how fluffy the pillows are in your special cabin. And how Sara Benincasea gives you all special "turndown" service.

HistoriCat June 6, 2011 at 4:08 pm

And how Sara Benincasea gives you all special "turndown" service.

I wish. You have to break 150 for that. Barb will get there first – I'm demanding video evidence.

Dashboard_Jesus June 7, 2011 at 2:04 am

I for one can't imagine why the BB has a sub-100 p-ness? you must have too many downfistin' trolls followin' you (accept the Jesus and you will be SAVED!)

ChapterUndVerse June 6, 2011 at 9:55 pm

Studiously making notes, and adding to your p-score, also. I should get my own owl, too.

BerkeleyBear June 6, 2011 at 3:37 pm

Managed by corporations that just happen to have close personal links to the top leadership in the state government. Preferably including at least one or more children/spouses of legislators on the board of directors getting six figures to go to one vacation spot/board meeting a year.

Not that I have witnessed that sort of thing in and out of government agencies

BlueMonkeh June 6, 2011 at 1:31 pm

I keep waiting for a hurricane to take care of that state for us.

bureaucrap June 6, 2011 at 1:34 pm

Global Warming will get there first. By 2020, the florida peninsula will only be 3 1/2 miles wide. They'll be using gondolas to get around downtown Miami.

HurricaneAli June 6, 2011 at 1:36 pm

50years=equals beachfront property in Orlando.

V572 [SSAN] June 6, 2011 at 1:43 pm

You can't outsmart Disney. They think long term.

4TheTurnstiles June 6, 2011 at 1:43 pm

Excuse me, must be going: time to burn some fossil fuels, for Progress

memzilla June 6, 2011 at 1:33 pm

If we outlaw political ethics, only outlaws will be ethical. Wait… what?

Goonemeritus June 6, 2011 at 1:33 pm

Legislators are public employees suckling on the sweet sweet breast of private enterprise I say cut their pensions, drug test them and don’t what ever you do let them assemble in groups bigger than three.

flamingpdog June 6, 2011 at 3:41 pm

They'll just unionize themselves, occupy the capital building, trash it, and recall the citizenry of Florida.

Dashboard_Jesus June 7, 2011 at 2:06 am

wherever there are two or more gathering in MY name you can be sure to get fucked, and we all say AMEN!

FlownOver June 6, 2011 at 1:33 pm

Florida: America's semi-flaccid penis since 1845

Oblios_Cap June 6, 2011 at 1:50 pm

But, remarkably, it'll still fuck the shit outta you. Re: Bush 2000.

edgydrifter June 6, 2011 at 1:34 pm

States like Florida really challenge my motivation to combat global climate change.

SpurningBeer June 6, 2011 at 2:27 pm

My corner of Floridong is so dry that the weeds are dying. Today it's 102 degrees, with a dew point over 80.

On the positive side, a friend-in-law — an engineer who went to Georgia Tech! — was parroting Rush Limbaugh a few weeks ago about how water never leaves the planet, there's plenty of it, and we don't need to conserve or worry about it. A few days later, I heard from my wife that his well went dry. The Germans call this Schadentrockenfreude, I believe.

HurricaneAli June 6, 2011 at 3:05 pm

The whole state is on fire, also. too.

GOPCrusher June 6, 2011 at 4:06 pm

Yeah, I don't like to wish bad things to happen to people, but it does put a smile on my face when you see people like Rick Perry demanding Federal funds to help them out with wildfires. Or Bobby Jindal complaining that the Federal government didn't respond fast enough to stop a disaster that a private business caused.

LionHeartSoyDog June 6, 2011 at 5:28 pm

Kudos on the eschewing of the alkohol, good sir.

SpurningBeer June 6, 2011 at 8:51 pm

Thank you, LHSD, but I'm not technically eschewing alcohol. I'm eschewing beer, and making do with stout and porter.

LionHeartSoyDog June 6, 2011 at 10:09 pm

Oops.
'scuse.

HurricaneAli June 6, 2011 at 1:34 pm

AAAAAAAAAAGHHHH!!1` IHATETHISFUCKINGSTATEIWANTOUTNOWWWWWWW!

AJWjr. June 6, 2011 at 1:40 pm

Be thankful for the fact that if you walk far enough in any of three directions, you'll find enough water to drown yourself in. Here in the desert southwest, I'd die of thirst just looking for a body of water. I guess the end result would be the same, the sweet release of death…

HurricaneAli June 6, 2011 at 1:49 pm

If I wanted the sweet release of death I'd move back to New Jersey.

Beowoof June 6, 2011 at 2:24 pm

I had planned to retire to Florida but they're just too many born again douche bags there for me. I plan on moving to Vegas, they may be douche bags but strippers and gambling sound much more tolerable.

AJWjr. June 6, 2011 at 2:40 pm

Vegas is a true blue oasis in an otherwise crimson state. I'm in the weeds about 65 or so miles outside of Vegas, surrounded by asshats and exes. At least it's cheap to live here…

mog253 June 6, 2011 at 3:06 pm

I think you have a country song title there. "Asshats and Exes"

HurricaneAli June 6, 2011 at 2:52 pm

Crap, we lost a good one in you, Beowoof. But you gotta know when to hold em' and when to fold em', you know?

I have less interest in going to Vegas since they've closed The Star Trek Experience exhibit. But strippers, yeah, ok, I'm with you there.

GOPCrusher June 6, 2011 at 4:08 pm

It's Vegas. Look hard enough you'll find a Star Trek themed strip club.

SpurningBeer June 6, 2011 at 2:29 pm

You can leave the state when you've finished your deep fried lunch and sweet tea, and not a second earlier, young lady.

HurricaneAli June 6, 2011 at 2:45 pm

Yes, sir.
/grudgingly takes bite of deep fried creamed corn nugget.

genxr June 6, 2011 at 1:36 pm

There you go again, FBI. Trying to punish people for their success.

poncho_pilot June 6, 2011 at 1:36 pm

funny how a state that looks like a dick would be run by dicks.

Dashboard_Jesus June 7, 2011 at 2:09 am

IRONICALLY funny!

ProgressiveInga June 6, 2011 at 1:37 pm

"make sure those welfare queens aren’t running around using their free handouts to buy drugs…."
When welfare queens are outlawed, only outlaws will be welfare queens. With drugs. Or something.

mavenmaven June 6, 2011 at 1:39 pm

Its just a way for the FBI guys to collect a little extra "protection" money from the politicians on the take, if ya know what I mean.

spinozasgod June 6, 2011 at 1:40 pm

If we just build a "fence" along the northern border we can make Florida itself a prison. All problems solved!

BerkeleyBear June 6, 2011 at 3:52 pm

That was the US's original idea, leaving it to the gators, Spanish and Seminoles, but then old Andy Jackson had to go and invade the damn place.

SayItWithWookies June 6, 2011 at 1:41 pm

Good luck with that, FBI — and get ready for the Supreme Court to rule that investigating a governor who's as corrupt as Rick Scott is a form of entrapment.

user-of-owls June 6, 2011 at 1:41 pm

So, you guys finally got a new picture of Bachmann I see.

Oblios_Cap June 6, 2011 at 1:47 pm

Ha! I got it.

lochnessmonster June 6, 2011 at 5:42 pm

hahaha

Doktor Zoom June 6, 2011 at 1:41 pm

Even if they can't clean up corruption, maybe they could appoint Carl Hiaasen as State Irony Comptroller. He'd definitely stay busy.

Rachel Maddow last week: Rick Scott, after bloviating about how horrible the federal stimulus and health care reform laws were and how FL would just say "no thanks" to that filthy fedrul money, submitted a budget with at least 60 line items funded by the stimulus package and by the health care reform law.

Weenus299 June 6, 2011 at 1:42 pm

Have they arrested the question-mark-suit guy yet?

SpurningBeer June 6, 2011 at 2:14 pm

I think he lives in Kensington, MD. Really.

ifthethunderdontgetya June 6, 2011 at 1:42 pm

Dear Governor Scott: You want to keep scamming the state for Solantic, your former wife's corporation?

You gotta cut us in on the action, know what we're sayin'?
-FBI
~

user-of-owls June 6, 2011 at 1:42 pm

Say what you will, but he's a reticulate man.

Trollina Dumbass June 6, 2011 at 1:53 pm

Clean and reticulate.

horsedreamer_1 June 6, 2011 at 2:31 pm

No serpentine dialect.

mumbly_joe June 6, 2011 at 8:08 pm

I dunno, I have my doubts on that one

Dashboard_Jesus June 7, 2011 at 1:24 am

WIN!

Sharkey June 6, 2011 at 1:42 pm

Hey Florida. 2000 called. They want their presidential election back.

DahBoner June 6, 2011 at 6:56 pm

Too bad since Florida was a capital punishment state, they already hung Chad…

Oblios_Cap June 6, 2011 at 1:43 pm

You are only allowed to buy rich people things with free government handouts.

I'm always amazed that so few people in America's Dinghus™ have a problem with Associated Industries of Florida throwing the legislators a big party at the beginning of each session to give them AIF's orders for that year. Big business runs this state and now we have a Governor who is going to make it more "business friendly" – i.e. lower wages, fewer workers' rights, and lower taxes on the rich.

And don't me started on South Florida, the nation's incubator of new and innovative criminal activity.

donner_froh June 6, 2011 at 1:44 pm

How could a state that elected a top level Medicare fraud operative as governor have a problem with corrupt officials?

baconzgood June 6, 2011 at 1:45 pm

Hard to believe this would happen under Rick Scott and Jeb Bush.

DerrickWildcat June 6, 2011 at 1:45 pm

Their College Football based economy will carry them through these troubling times.

freakishlywrong June 6, 2011 at 1:46 pm

Jeeze, you'd think the Governor was mandating drug tests and had signed over his huge walk-in healthcare clinic, Solantic, that does drug testing, to his wife or something. I mean, DUH.

Oblios_Cap June 6, 2011 at 1:46 pm

no.

V572 [SSAN] June 6, 2011 at 1:47 pm

Where is form Sec of State Kitty Harris when we need her? Only she can save the Sunshine State! Just look at her!

ifthethunderdontgetya June 6, 2011 at 1:49 pm

Wonkette Classic™ pic.
~

HurricaneAli June 6, 2011 at 1:51 pm

Time for a Wonkette Blingee Contest™

AJWjr. June 6, 2011 at 1:55 pm

Nice hat.

genxr June 6, 2011 at 1:56 pm

Yep time to whip out the big guns.

Guppy06 June 6, 2011 at 2:25 pm

Those guns have since been overshadowed, so to speak, by the McCain twins.

ProgressiveInga June 6, 2011 at 1:59 pm

But I thought that the point of this Wonkarticle is that Florida needs LESS boobs?!?

donner_froh June 6, 2011 at 1:47 pm

Florida is a bunch of ugly buildings on a semi-tropical swamp with hurricanes blowing through a few times per year. Rednecks in the north, Mafia (Cuban and otherwise) in the south, all of them ready to steal from tourists, sell them drugs or lock them up.

Or all three.

BaldarTFlagass June 6, 2011 at 1:53 pm

My folks lived on Big Pine Key back in the 90's, when there were several instances of tourists up in Miami getting gunned down as collateral damage during some drug war battles. My old man told me that shortly thereafter, he started seeing bumperstickers around saying "Tourists! Come back!! We weren't shooting at you!!!

OneDollarJuana June 6, 2011 at 1:48 pm

Once again we are shown another reason that we should re-enact the Civil War, but this time let the South stay seceded. Maybe if we pay them an exit bonus?

weejee June 6, 2011 at 1:49 pm

welfare queens aren’t running around using their free handouts to buy drugs

Does this mean Kitty Harris has skipped-out and is now living in the Cayman Islands or somewhere similar where it is more difficult to secure extradition?

user-of-owls June 6, 2011 at 1:52 pm

Florida gives Banana Republics a bad name.

donner_froh June 6, 2011 at 2:12 pm

El Salvador but with more gunplay.

horsedreamer_1 June 6, 2011 at 2:36 pm

In Miami, more Russian mob, less MS13.

user-of-owls June 6, 2011 at 2:49 pm

Equatorial Guinea but with less rule of law.

donner_froh June 6, 2011 at 2:55 pm

Guatemala bit with more impunity.

user-of-owls June 6, 2011 at 5:20 pm

Myanmar with less transparency.

lulzmonger June 6, 2011 at 3:06 pm

Sierra Leone but with more cannibalism.

GOPCrusher June 6, 2011 at 5:00 pm

This thread has been approved by The Florida Board Of Tourism.

weejee June 6, 2011 at 1:52 pm

That would be the shits!

HurricaneAli June 6, 2011 at 1:53 pm

Rat weiners?

weejee June 6, 2011 at 1:53 pm

With music by Elmo James?

V572 [SSAN] June 6, 2011 at 1:57 pm

I had to type with both hands, for once,in order to be quick enough to find the obvious linky-dink.

Come here a minute June 6, 2011 at 1:59 pm

Florida needs someone to go Skink on their elected officials.

weejee June 6, 2011 at 2:01 pm

'Zactly. Years ago you find things like "Official", or at least official looking, Botswana Lawn Bowling Team linen shirts at Banana Republic. Then they hired MBAs with surgically removed senses of humor. Now they are boring and overpriced the 'official' biz skool formula for 'Murican success.

CapeClod June 6, 2011 at 2:01 pm

Neither was Dave Barry.

jus_wonderin June 6, 2011 at 2:02 pm

Is that the Playtex Pocket Gopher Bra?

Oh, this should have been in the post with K. Harris. I am slipping.

fuflans June 6, 2011 at 2:03 pm

does rick scott always look like voldemort?

SorosBot June 6, 2011 at 2:21 pm

He actually looks just like another famed corrupt businessman turned corrupt politician, Lex Luthor.

HurricaneAli June 6, 2011 at 3:00 pm

Don't insult Lex Luthor like that – he's my favorite baddie!

Which one? All of them, Katie.

freakishlywrong June 6, 2011 at 3:00 pm

Rick Scott IS Voldermort.

fuflans June 6, 2011 at 2:04 pm

is it too late to call the fbi about a stolen election?

they'd do a better job than the supreme court i think.

x111e7thst June 6, 2011 at 2:06 pm

Meh. There is no problem so bad that the feebs can't make it worse.

CapeClod June 6, 2011 at 2:08 pm

If the FBI comes for him, I bet Rick Scott retreats to his ugly nueveau riche mansion, loads up on blow and comes out of his office machine guns ablazing.

BaldarTFlagass June 6, 2011 at 2:13 pm

Say hello to all my little lobbyist friends!!!

pinkocommi June 6, 2011 at 2:18 pm

After the SCOTUS's decision in Citizens United, I thought bribery and corruption are protected by the First Amendment.

Biel_ze_Bubba June 6, 2011 at 2:23 pm

Don't go giving them ideas.

mrblifil June 6, 2011 at 2:23 pm

Breitbart now posting topless pictures of Weiner, from "alleged" recipient.

simplyblue7 June 6, 2011 at 2:23 pm

You pretty much expect to be screwed over in Florida…afterall, it is the Penis state.

Pragmatist2 June 6, 2011 at 2:29 pm

I'm from New jersey and I am sure we can top Florida in corruption.
Come on guys! Beat Florida!!!!!

user-of-owls June 6, 2011 at 3:04 pm

Hold on Joisey, on a per capita basis Rhode Island would mop the floor with both of you. Don't believe me? Just call up Buddy Cianci's radio show, he'll tell you a thing or two.
http://www.630wpro.com/sectional.asp?id=18073

elviouslyqueer June 6, 2011 at 3:11 pm

Nope, sorry. Louisiana is and will always be the Land of Corruption. Hell, we've been experts at it before we were even a damn state.

Pragmatist2 June 6, 2011 at 3:20 pm

Hey! I was very careful. I said Jersey could beat Florida. I never said nothing about Rhode Island. I know better. True story, you guys had a Chief Justice who came home one time and found a body in is freezer. It was put there as a joke by some of his former clients.
AS to Louisiana, I'm not impressed. If Edwards or the Longs were still around, you'd be in the running. But Pyush Jindal???? No.

elviouslyqueer June 6, 2011 at 3:29 pm

Well granted, Jindal is too stupid to be corrupt (or at least he hasn't been caught… yet). But really, we're so used to corruption everydamnwhere that we're actually shocked when somebody gets testy about a piddly little thing like vote buying.

user-of-owls June 6, 2011 at 3:49 pm

Many, many moons ago, Owls (who was hatched just over the border in Mass), was in a bar when a couple of hoodlums/friends came in and shouted, "Luccini's is going up in 15 minutes." We swilled down what was left of our cocktails, dashed to the car and joined the other 20 or so vehicles parked across the street from the doomed restaurant and sure enough, whoosh, up she went. When the cops and firemen (who, by the way, were sold copies of the firefighters exam before taking it) showed up, all they had left to do was break up the belligerents.

We had a phrase for that sort of thing: Italian lightning.

user-of-owls June 6, 2011 at 3:43 pm

Ok, with that Palin-sized caveat, the Rhodies will put down there cudgels. Another true story: back in the 70s, the FBI launched Operation Diogenes after they received credible reports that there was a high-ranking state official who was clean.

Well that's what my friend's cousin whose former brother-in-law was a statie said. I think. Or maybe I just thought that up on that last peyote trip.

Redhead June 6, 2011 at 2:38 pm

More than one. See also: Barry, Dave; Dorsey, Tim; Hiasson, Carl.

GodShammgod June 6, 2011 at 2:38 pm

I'm hoping to God I get into a medical school outside of Florida so I can leave this state forever.

Oh, and buttsecks.

proudgrampa June 6, 2011 at 2:42 pm

OK. I may be missing something here. But FL doesn't sound all that bad. At least, it's not a fucking theocracy like UT.

Just sayin'.

BaldarTFlagass June 6, 2011 at 2:46 pm

If that's the case, I just want to meet the guy who had a weed-whacker for a hand.

Beowoof June 6, 2011 at 9:00 pm

I saw him talking about the guy who couldn't get the pit bull off his arm and the guy cutting the dog's head off to get away.

Gorillionaire June 6, 2011 at 2:50 pm

The FBI should just put together a "GOP Trap" to track and capture corrupt politicians. Like say a bunch of marked bills in a little boy's underpants.

elviouslyqueer June 6, 2011 at 2:57 pm

At least Memphis elects corrupt assholes that give money away instead of hoarding it for themselves.

If by "giving money away" you mean "funneling money to your political cronies and/or shady land developers" or "having to pay exorbitant amounts of child support for the 13 kids you've fathered out of wedlock," then yes, I agree totally.

HurricaneAli June 6, 2011 at 2:59 pm

Undoubtedly.

owhatever June 6, 2011 at 3:03 pm

Hey, Feebs, just how hard is it to find a crooked politician in Florida? Do we get polished little junior investigator badges if we help? J. Edgar's rotting corpse is rolling over in his sequined evening gown.

samsuncle June 6, 2011 at 3:06 pm

Hiaasen is one of my favorite authors. He writes a colunm once or twice a month for the Miami Herald.

lulzmonger June 6, 2011 at 3:08 pm
BarackMyWorld June 6, 2011 at 3:22 pm

Horrible state is horrible.

flamingpdog June 6, 2011 at 3:32 pm

Pffft! This is nothin' that couldn't be solved by more tax cuts.

DahBoner June 6, 2011 at 7:00 pm

And cutting unemployment bennies down to a good pat on the back for the lucky duckies…

BZ1 June 6, 2011 at 3:32 pm

ahem, when did Floridionions elect Skeletor??

weejee June 6, 2011 at 3:44 pm

We did that years ago in Warshington, twice even. Was a douche by the name of Slade Gorton, but we tossed his bonez out 'bout ten years back.

WriteyWriterton June 6, 2011 at 3:41 pm

Rick Scott might make a great modern-day Faust, if he had a soul to sell.

BerkeleyBear June 6, 2011 at 3:46 pm

I'm guessing you'd hear the wheezing and panting long before the feet, given the whole need to haul out a limo to move his larbutt 100 yards from the chopper to the baseball field last week.

BerkeleyBear June 6, 2011 at 3:50 pm

Yeah, but the problem is that he makes them seem charming half (or more) of the time. Or at least human and therefore not worthy of being condemmed out of hand. It is like "The Wire" and Balmore – you know they are doing terrible things, but you don't hate them the way you should.

Love Hiaasen, by the way.

Peace in our time June 6, 2011 at 3:57 pm

Ein Busch Gurke?

GOPCrusher June 6, 2011 at 4:00 pm

Make them triremes. It could be a Jobs Program as you chain 50 slaves, errr, unemployed persons, into the rowing positions.

Lascauxcaveman June 6, 2011 at 4:48 pm

Not equally, as I recall. For some reason my pee only went down 8 points, but I remember some of the real superstars here getting cut almost in half.

Chilling times, those, when all we hold dear seemed to hang in the balance, waiting for an ill wind to cast the first stone, knocking the bird in the hand out of the black pot and into the fire.

user-of-owls June 6, 2011 at 5:14 pm

Count me among those whose fortunes were dashed that nightmarish day. Chilling times indeed, for sterling souls with their bootstraps on the good soil who are the backbone of a shining city in the meeeel where John Edwards pere cast his lot with seven year's of bad luck that came before the egg.

DahBoner June 6, 2011 at 6:51 pm

Hey, I'd turn in a corrupt Florida politician if the FBI would give me a coupon for healthcare…

DahBoner June 6, 2011 at 6:52 pm

It's like Craigslist, but it's printed on paper…

easybaked June 6, 2011 at 6:52 pm

What's not being reported in this story is that the FBI also has placed an ad on Craig's List:

You: Knows how to show a man with a large bulge in his pocket where all the dirty places are.

Me: Will pay for your time and a hotel room – and has several well-dressed and well-equipped men who will join us.

DahBoner June 6, 2011 at 6:59 pm

"At least its warm in Florida"

It's not the heat, it's the stupidity….

HurricaneAli June 6, 2011 at 7:02 pm

I just saw the headlines, going over to TMP, now.

ChapterUndVerse June 6, 2011 at 10:03 pm

Tim Dorsey also has a clue, although he's fond of bad puns and serial killers. Still, that's what makes him authentic.

tessiee June 6, 2011 at 10:51 pm

And why MUST they persist in wearing those dreadful inexpensive clothes?

ganmerlad June 7, 2011 at 9:05 am

I came across a site that had that fish picture as the main topic of conversation half a year or more ago, and almost every commenter thought it was real. Saying it was a "baboon skull in a fish skin" ruined their make believe world and pissed them off. Republicans, sheesh.

HistoriCat June 7, 2011 at 9:15 am

I miss the old days my dear – when there were standards.

ttommyunger June 7, 2011 at 7:48 pm

A byword in local law enforcement circles in the 60's; still true today: three most overrated things in America, home cooking, home fucking and the FBI.

AnarchyIsBetter December 3, 2011 at 11:50 am

An investigation needs to be done on the internet stings being performed throughout the country because they are illegal and amount to nothing more than the creation of crime and entrapment. Manufacturing crime is a perfect way to cover-up corruption because the crime that is created appears to be legitimate as long as the media helps spread the lies of law enforcement.

AnarchyIsBetter December 3, 2011 at 11:51 am

There was an FBI investigation over the bribery of legislators to approve the construction of the “Blackwater River Correctional Facility”. The prison was built even though prison populations were expected to shrink, I have not heard anything else about the investigation, and police are performing internet stings like it’s the only thing they can do in an effort to increase felon statistics to cover-up the bribes and justify the construction of a new prison that we did not need. I have emailed the FBI to try to get into contact with someone that could hear my complaint that would help with the investigation but have been unsuccessful. I believe this to be because the FBI are also performing illegal stings so they know exactly what I am talking about but are covering it up too.

AnarchyIsBetter December 3, 2011 at 11:51 am

What are the citizens of this country supposed to do when the very people that are in charge of protecting us are actually using us to make the politicians rich who invest money into crime that does not exist so then they just create it? Visit the blogs at http://floridascandal.blogspot.com for supporting case law and other information proving these stings are illegal. Here is a link about the investigation: http://my.firedoglake.com/mt6112a/2011/06/23/fbi-….

Geminisunmars June 6, 2011 at 3:08 pm

next line: "At least we ain't in Texas"

AJWjr. June 6, 2011 at 3:46 pm

Perhaps, though I'm sure the irony would be lost on both the asshats and the exes.

tessiee June 6, 2011 at 10:48 pm

SILENCE, PEASANT!

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