Sarah Palin Has No Idea Who Paul Revere Was, Or What He Did

by Wonkette Jr.

Idiot.Jabbering imbecile Sarah Palin and her rented tour bus continue to bring laughs to America. Here’s how she described Paul Revere’s famous 1775 secret horseback ride through the countryside where he quietly warned revolutionary conspirators of the British Army’s progress between Boston and Lexington, where they planned to arrest Samuel Adams and John Hancock: “He who warned uh, the British that they weren’t gonna be takin’ away our arms, uh by ringing those bells, and um, makin’ sure as he’s riding his horse through town to send those warning shots and bells that we were going to be sure and we were going to be free, and we were going to be armed.” You must watch this video from the local news in Boston.

Could Sarah Palin be stupider?

Yes, and she is stupider: She also claims Paul Revere’s “midnight ride” on the eve of the Revolutionary War has something to do with the U.S. Constitution’s second amendment — the Bill of Rights wouldn’t exist until 1789 and wouldn’t be ratified until the end of 1791 — another 16 years after Revere’s famous ride. Ugh, every time Sarah Palin speaks in public, the nation’s collective IQ drops another point.

Oh, and those British takin’ away our arms? Paul Revere was British. Hancock and Adams were British. (Revere also never shouted “The British are coming,” both because that would defeat the purpose of quietly riding by night to alert his fellow revolutionary elitists and because they were all British.) He rang no bells, he fired no shots. Again, what would be the point of a secret midnight ride — and he was one of approximately 40 revolutionary conspirators and spies riding around Lexington that night warning of the army’s approach — if he was banging on bells and firing shots into the sky like some common Wasilla meth freak with a semi-automatic?

And then Sarah Palin’s stupidity and vapidity reached the known threshold and she vanished into space-time. Not really. Not ever. [PoliticsUSA]

 

Hola wonkerados.

To improve site performance, we did a thing. It could be up to three minutes before your comment appears. DON'T KEEP RETRYING, OKAY?

Also, if you are a new commenter, your comment may never appear. This is probably because we hate you.

{ 718 comments }

nounverb911 June 3, 2011 at 1:03 pm

Paul Revere? Didn't he say the Bristols are coming, the Bristols are coming?

ManchuCandidate June 3, 2011 at 1:05 pm

Not Bristols. The Nearers are coming.

BlueMonkeh June 3, 2011 at 1:08 pm

And I'd like to offer a laurel and hearty handshake to our new near.

littlebigdaddy June 3, 2011 at 1:13 pm

"Bristol cities"="titties" Bet SP doesn't know that either.

Rosie_Scenario June 3, 2011 at 1:38 pm

The Wasillans are coming, the Wasillans are coming.

Lascauxcaveman June 3, 2011 at 1:43 pm

I can't believe she didn't mention Paul's famous pony, Yankee Doodle, by name. Or the fact that Revere rode him all the way to London, just to get some take-out pasta and feathers.

She left out the best parts!

Rarian Rakista June 3, 2011 at 10:17 pm

Yankee Doodle, he talked to, right?

themcwow June 3, 2011 at 1:44 pm

with Harvey's Bristol Cream

GOPCrusher June 3, 2011 at 2:20 pm

Nah. Him and The Raiders recorded "Kicks" back in the 60's.

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 2:24 pm

"Paul Revere? Didn't he say the Bristols are coming, the Bristols are coming?"

No, that was Levi.

ablington June 3, 2011 at 1:05 pm

…and this is why we ring bells at the stroke of midnight on the 4th of July, and also why we tie onions on our belts, which was the style at the time…

PabaBritannica June 3, 2011 at 1:44 pm

I remember that, it was in Nineteen Tickety.

TanzbodenKoenig June 3, 2011 at 3:32 pm

We had to call it dickety because the Kaiser stole the teen!

GhostBuggy June 3, 2011 at 3:37 pm

"Give me five bees for a quarter," you'd say…

axmxz June 3, 2011 at 4:24 pm

It's a ghost quarter, but you'll be able to spend it pretty soon.

ManchuCandidate June 3, 2011 at 1:05 pm

"And then he made those great pots which the Patriots and Minute Rice Men used to cook a feast that lulled the Red Coats to sleep and allowed them to steal their coats to start the Burlington Coat Factory."

Steverino247 June 3, 2011 at 1:21 pm

And Burlington is in New Hampshire and not Vermont, too!

102415 June 3, 2011 at 1:45 pm

So that's why the Islams want the Burlington Coat FactorY!1!1
Hey downfister bitch, why are all your Media Whores so ignorant?

comrad_darkness June 3, 2011 at 2:44 pm

AKA Revere Ware

petehammer June 3, 2011 at 3:33 pm

I'm afraid to ask her how babies are made.

tessiee June 3, 2011 at 6:27 pm

I don't think she knows, either.

Swampgas_Man June 3, 2011 at 8:53 pm

She should ask Bristol?

Barb June 3, 2011 at 11:58 pm

Yeah, like Bristol knows!

ChessieNefercat June 4, 2011 at 11:02 am

"I'm afraid to ask her how babies are made. "

So was Bristol.

CrankyLttlCamperette June 3, 2011 at 1:05 pm

Forget that 15-year-old Constitutional scholar, a third-grader with a basic social studies curriculum could best La Grifter in historical knowledge. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

Terry June 3, 2011 at 1:08 pm

Laugh. Keep laughing loudly and as publically as possible.

ArmoredBore June 3, 2011 at 1:15 pm

Sobbing. Right now. Coworkers are looking at me funny. Again.

Dumbedup June 3, 2011 at 1:35 pm

cry

102415 June 3, 2011 at 1:49 pm

Yes, cry. The Media Whore is front page in New Hampshire above Romey's declaration. Breitbart jackasses must be happy today.

PsycWench June 3, 2011 at 3:53 pm

My seventh-grade daughter collapsed onto my shoulder from laughing.

Fare la Volpe June 3, 2011 at 5:48 pm

Please tell me you're giving your daughter a thorough education in Snark. I need hope for the younger generation.

PsycWench June 3, 2011 at 5:52 pm

She's slowly but surely picking up on the snark thing. She's definitely getting an education in being liberal. Prior to the 2008 election, she and her best friend formed the Peace Out Cheese Doodle Obama Lovers Club, I'm sure some wingnut will be looking into this now.

UpFistTroll June 3, 2011 at 10:29 pm

I have to warn you: that may be the best club name of all time.

tessiee June 3, 2011 at 6:28 pm

"a third-grader with a basic social studies curriculum could best La Grifter in historical knowledge"

Yes, but could they prance around a stage in a flag-patterned bikini, firing guns at the ceiling?

ChessieNefercat June 4, 2011 at 11:04 am

Oh great, now cactuscunt has an idea for a 4th of July spectacular with which to treat a grateful nation.

PeaceWithHonor June 3, 2011 at 1:06 pm

Oh for Christ's fucking sake. This bitch couldn't lead a cheer competition.

Barb June 3, 2011 at 1:06 pm

Jesus, tap dancing Christ! Why can't they make a movie, "The Queen's Speech" where Geoffrey Rush teaches her not to speak at all.

SpurningBeer June 3, 2011 at 1:25 pm

And of course, we will always remember that the New England Patriots, who fought with their bare arms to protect our rights, yes!, CLINGING to our bare arms, President OBAMA!!!, so that we can be so thankful for all the wonderful troops and the freedoms we enjoy. Do you remember The King's Peach? Wasn't that a great story? So let's make our voices heard and let those lamestream media bureaucraps in Washington know that the shots heard round the clock there in Lexington Kentucky for every man, woman and child in America!

Barb June 3, 2011 at 1:32 pm

That is hilarious, Spurning! Thanks!
Fuck you, Sarah Palin and the horse Paul Revere rode in on.

(this may be a repost) My comments are vaporizing.

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 6:05 pm

Mine too. Also.

Chet Kincaid June 3, 2011 at 3:55 pm

Stop it Barb, you're killing me!

Barb June 3, 2011 at 4:07 pm

I'm sorry, I don't want to kill you. I like having you around.

Lascauxcaveman June 4, 2011 at 2:04 am

But admit it. you want to wound him a little.

ChessieNefercat June 4, 2011 at 11:08 am

"Jesus, tap dancing Christ! "

When I was small, I overhead a phrase that just utterly fascinated me. It seems to fit at this tragic time in our nation's history (the rise of cactuscunt from her snowbank).

"Jesus Jumped-up Christ in a chariot-driven sidecar."
I have no idea what it means but it does roll right off the tongue.

MittsHairHelmet June 3, 2011 at 1:07 pm

WHDH in the house! (I'm from Boston)

Allmighty_Manos June 3, 2011 at 2:13 pm

Good thing my Grandmother wasn't around to see this, see would have kicked in her TV

BlueMonkeh June 3, 2011 at 1:07 pm

History schmistory. Facts are for pointy headed elitist snobs, not REAL duhMerkuns.

Oblios_Cap June 3, 2011 at 2:19 pm

You don't need no fancy book learnin' when you gots Jebus.

trampndirtdown June 3, 2011 at 9:48 pm

If it aint in the bible it aint true so burn it. If it repeats what's in the bible you don't need it so burn it. That's all you need to know about books.

memzilla June 3, 2011 at 1:07 pm

At least Paul Revere didn't quit his ride half-way through.

mormos June 3, 2011 at 1:47 pm

well, actually…

comrad_darkness June 3, 2011 at 3:55 pm

Bill Dawes would beg to differ.

memzilla June 3, 2011 at 4:16 pm

OK, then: "At least Paul Revere didn't quit his ride half-way through so that he could become a shameless media-whoring grifter."

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 6:06 pm

If it was wrong, it's fixed now!

WordSaladNation June 3, 2011 at 11:10 pm

Your p-points are AWESOME right now.

memzilla June 4, 2011 at 12:29 am

You know we men always lie about the size of our p-ness.

Dashboard_Jesus June 4, 2011 at 2:25 am

wow, nice one…that's the first 300+ upfists I've ever seen on the Wonkettes (and I'm proud to be #302!) your p-ness must be HUGE now!

lulzmonger June 4, 2011 at 1:12 pm

You have my sword! Also my shield, too!

Plus thumb # 324!

Truly, if Saint Sarah Of The Meth-Labs had written it, it would've been "The Declaration Of In."

weejee June 3, 2011 at 1:07 pm

Of the North Church tower as a signal light,–
One if by bus, and two with a truss;
Sarah's history facts are just such a muss,
Ready to grift and spread the alarm
Through every Buttsechs village and farm,
Teatards on their Hoverounds swarm.

SmutBoffin June 3, 2011 at 1:25 pm

WHY DOES DOWNFISTER HATE LONGFELLOW?

weejee June 3, 2011 at 1:46 pm

Must be a shortfellow when it comes to P'ness

102415 June 3, 2011 at 1:52 pm

She hates everything but fetuses. Try a fetus joke?

weejee June 3, 2011 at 2:06 pm

It's hard to be a fetus these days. Really just scraping by.

102415 June 3, 2011 at 2:19 pm

Excellent joke.
Today there are many downfisters falling like radiation poision all around us. lol. They are so excited by ignorance! Dumbasses. I'm going to the post office. There is a fallout shelter there still until the teabaggers close it down.

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 6:08 pm

"WHY DOES DOWNFISTER HATE LONGFELLOW? "

Because he's jealous, silly! Bwahahah.

MaxUdargo June 3, 2011 at 11:23 pm

Look, are you people going to explain who or what the fuck "downfister" is, or is it something only the cool kids know and now you're going to give me a wedgie.

102415 June 4, 2011 at 2:29 am

The downfister bitch is usually one Spanky2b who comes over from the Breitbart hell Big Government and spends hours going up the back end of the threads hitting the down fist on everyone's comments. We shout out warnings when we see the points of our comrades get suddenly lower so the next person will knock everyone back up one. If you see someone with a zero who doesn't deserve it she has just come through. She also is *following* about 1000 or so of us. You get a message in your email about it. I really for the life of me don't know why she needs to do that but she does. If you look at who visited a profile you will sometimes see her. You can then click on her and read her idiot posts at Breitbart. It gives him a page view but it will let you see the Bachmann loving crazy up close. It's not pretty. Okay?

seppdecker June 3, 2011 at 1:08 pm

If we could figure out how to turn stupid into electricity, she could power the entire east coast.

GuyClinch June 3, 2011 at 1:13 pm

Drill baby drill!

petehammer June 3, 2011 at 3:40 pm

Just how big do you think the east coast is?

Oh, were you talking the east coast of the continent?

AJWjr. June 3, 2011 at 6:57 pm

East coast of alASKa?

tessiee June 3, 2011 at 6:34 pm

Yeah, but she'd refuse to, because the East Coast isn't REAL Amurrka.

UpFistTroll June 3, 2011 at 10:22 pm

Shit, that's easy. Put 'er on a treadmill, and hang a gun and a Bible at the end. She'll run forever in her quest to cling to them.

ChessieNefercat June 4, 2011 at 11:13 am

You're absolutely right, and if she does get a trifle bored (the bible is a book, after all), just hang a microphone and a camera in front of her. We could power the whole west ccoast too. Free electric cars for everyone.

Arken June 3, 2011 at 1:08 pm

The only reason Revere is heralded today is because Henry Wadsworth Longfollow thought 'Revere' was a good rhyming word.

Sue4466 June 3, 2011 at 1:16 pm

Fucking poets. Socialists, every damn one of them.

Pithaughn June 3, 2011 at 1:33 pm

Call him, ask him what rhymes with "one who mangles English language."

smitallica June 3, 2011 at 4:11 pm

"This woman is the meat in a stupid sangwich"?

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 6:09 pm

"Call him, ask him what rhymes with "one who mangles English language.""

Answer: "Palin"

trampndirtdown June 3, 2011 at 9:51 pm

Wait Gingrich is Santa Claus now?

102415 June 3, 2011 at 1:54 pm

And you know who else got a pretty nice silver bowl?

GOPCrusher June 3, 2011 at 2:30 pm

The 2010 Chicago Blackhawks?

SheriffRoscoe June 3, 2011 at 2:38 pm

King George the Third?

user-of-owls June 3, 2011 at 2:48 pm

Ming the Merciless?

comrad_darkness June 3, 2011 at 3:56 pm

The Detroit Red Wings . . . most seasons?

GOPCrusher June 3, 2011 at 4:37 pm

Must. Fight. Urge. To. Downfist…………

flamingpdog June 3, 2011 at 8:14 pm

Willie Nelson?

PostApocalypse June 3, 2011 at 2:49 pm

@Arken – Hey, keep my penis out of this.

gurukalehuru June 3, 2011 at 2:51 pm

For rhyme and meter, there are certain flaws
with the name of William Dawes

SpurningBeer June 3, 2011 at 10:14 pm

When I was a young Rastaman, decades ago, in high school in Alabama, a football coach/history teacher taught us about that patriot, but pronounced his last name "DAW-weeze."

Your couplet doesn't scan or rhyme for me.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 12:33 pm

This made me imagine Da Bears fans pronouncing his name as "Da Weeze".

Chillwaver June 3, 2011 at 1:08 pm

She's learnin' and educatin' us alright:
"The "One Nation Tour" is part of our new campaign to educate and energize Americans about our nation's founding principles, in order to promote the Fundamental Restoration of America."

Cat_Damon June 3, 2011 at 1:09 pm

i had to stop after 0:25 seconds. i know there's only 8 seconds left, but i JUST. CAN'T. LISTEN. to that woman speak. good god.

trampndirtdown June 3, 2011 at 9:52 pm

Replay it on mute you have to see the anchor's expression. this one http://www.rumproast.com/index.php/site/comments/

ChessieNefercat June 4, 2011 at 11:23 am

Ooh, I like the comment section at the bottom with little clicky boxes to put in bold, italic, quotes, etc.

Oh, also the anchor's expression. I think perhaps the beginning of the end for history's most annoying political vampire will be when the media decides that all the cool kids know that Sarah is to be laughed at.

Hopefully we are coming to the end of seeing anchors with the "Look at me, see me gently furrow my brow and look serious, not that I have a clue what I'm yammering on about" expression in regard to Palin.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 12:34 pm

"I think perhaps the beginning of the end for history's most annoying political vampire will be when the media decides that
*all the cool kids know that Sarah is to be laughed at*."

Isn't that pretty much the raison d'etre for Wonkette?

MaxUdargo June 3, 2011 at 11:30 pm

I notice she has a "tell" when she knows she's making shit up and has wandered off into the corn maze: her voice gets louder and her pitch even higher. Watch it again and notice how her voice changes at about "riding his HORSE THROUGH TOWN…" I think that's the point where she realized she'd been trapped in a corner by yet another "gotcha" question from the lamestream media.

ChessieNefercat June 4, 2011 at 11:26 am

"…wandered off into the corn maze"

Oh, I love that!

Yeah, yet another gotcha question to a US presidential candidate: "Who was Paul Revere?"

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 12:38 pm

"another gotcha question to a US presidential candidate: "Who was Paul Revere?""

It's a spectacular race to the bottom.
In another couple of weeks, her interviews will be like the Saturday Night Live Version of "Jeopardy" with Burt Reynolds and Sean Connery:
Alex Trebek: Name a number between one and ten.
Sean Connery: Your mother, Alex.
Alex Trebek [desperate]: OK, name a color. Any color. Just say something.

MaxUdargo June 4, 2011 at 3:09 pm

I love it too, but it isn't a Max Udargo original. Tina Fey used the expression while discussing her impersonation.

My favorite comment on the half-baked Alaskan, and I can't remember who said it, but it's perfect: "Sarah Palin uses words the way a squid uses ink."

baconzgood June 3, 2011 at 1:10 pm

"the fucking moron is comming the moron is comming"

-Paul Revere about Sarah Palin-

Tundra Grifter June 3, 2011 at 1:26 pm

Isn't that was Duh Guv'Nor screamed at Todd?

Lazy Media June 3, 2011 at 1:10 pm

She probably thinks Revereware is a kind of coat.

GuyClinch June 3, 2011 at 1:10 pm

Thank fake jeebus that Palin wasn't around back then. She would've shrilly given away the whole game. I mean, look how quietly she goes on a family vacation that she asserts is not a publicity tour.

She's just going around and, uh, pretending to visit historic sites and, uh, ridin' that bus and blowin' that horn, lettin' 'em know the stupid are comin'!

finallyhappy June 3, 2011 at 1:22 pm

One of the kids- I forget the other names -complained that the press was ruining their vacation. Hey, stupid- your mom did not take you on vacation.

Gleem_McShineys June 3, 2011 at 2:31 pm

Ha ha, poor kid. The blame-redirection / martyr genes are strong in this one, but she just hasn't got the the Big Grift Picture skills down quite yet.

Successful media-whores make sure they single out specific targets in the press. That way, your captive army of KFC-receptacle-people can scooter out and mount the attack. You don't just blame "the press," it's too generic, and mostly because blob-Americans can't get their rage-ons up without media stimulation.

Plus, you have to use those emotional power words. "Ruining our vacation" is just meh. There is no such thing as too much melodrama for the Teabaggers.

So, "MSNBC is suicide-bombing our peaceful family time! THEY WANT TO ABORT OUR TOGETHERNESS LIKE A FETUS!!"

Negropolis June 4, 2011 at 1:56 am

Did you see how she was using Piper (the little one) for crowd control? I am not kidding. As they were walking, Piper, looking like a pro, was directing the media crush whilst walking. Sarah's training that girl to be her aide. It was really sad. :(

102415 June 4, 2011 at 2:42 am

According to her neighbors in Alaska when they complained about traffic on their street she sent Willow out to sell lemonade and then said everyone was being mean to her kid in retaliation. It's why she always has a kid with her. Remember when dragged one out on the baseball field thinking no one would dare to boo her? She suckered Letterman with that one and he had to apologize for a pretty funny joke. It's why so many women hate her. She is a shit.

Negropolis June 4, 2011 at 3:11 am

When the creepy author dude moved in next door to her to write his book about her, it was reported that she sent Track out to exercize on the Palin lawn as an intimidation tactic. That woman is horrible to those children. She totally uses people. We now have at least one example for each child how she uses them.

This woman has no friends; she can't make personal bonds. She's a sociopath, quite frankly.

ChessieNefercat June 4, 2011 at 11:31 am

Yes, and I saw another media person put his arm out to keep the poor little kid from falling in the midst of all the jostling. Mommy dearest never even noticed.

I also noticed how that little kid stayed pressed up against a grown man who was a stranger to her. Mommy dearest never even noticed that, either.

What mother or father wouldn't grab their kid in a scrum like that and hold them close to protect them, while carrying on their adult conversation?

She is a sickening excuse for a mother.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 12:54 pm

"Yes, and I saw another media person put his arm out to keep the poor little kid from falling in the midst of all the jostling. Mommy dearest never even noticed.

I also noticed how that little kid stayed pressed up against a grown man who was a stranger to her. Mommy dearest never even noticed that, either."

Good Lord, that's horrible! Those poor kids.
No wonder Whistle falls on her back with her legs in the air for anyone who shows her a scrap of attention.
If I weren't a heartless shit, I would actually feel very sorry for those kids.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 12:43 pm

"Did you see how she was using Piper (the little one) for crowd control? … Piper, looking like a pro, was directing the media crush whilst walking. Sarah's training that girl to be her aide."

Well, she *was* going to use the fat one as a prop for abstinence, but that didn't work, because Brillo couldn't keep her legs closed. Then she was going to use the dumb one as a prop for… I don't know, forced pregnancy or something?… and that seems to be working, so she's one for one so far.

So you really can't blame her too much for seeing what kind of use she can get out of Peeper or whoever, because until they get big enough to help out around the meth lab, they have to earn their keep *some* way. She's not about to pay for all those damn kids herself, you know.

occams8ball June 3, 2011 at 2:33 pm

"It's not in our charter! This is not what our founding royals intended!

neiltheblaze June 3, 2011 at 3:00 pm

Sarah, like all Conservatives, would have been a Tory.

CivicHoliday June 3, 2011 at 1:10 pm

On the plus side, she just won herself a gig as a visiting professor at Bob Jones University, where she can make her books required reading in her class "The Constitution and Me: Patriotism for Dummies"

SpurningBeer June 3, 2011 at 1:31 pm

That's just a little bit premature, CH. She hasn't been awarded her honorary GED at Pensacola Christian College yet.

trampndirtdown June 3, 2011 at 10:05 pm

She should just write to Thomas Edison State Teachers College, our state(Idaho) Superintendent of Schools got a sweet degree in weights and measures from there. http://www.43rdstateblues.com/?q=node/5805

jqpublick June 4, 2011 at 11:34 pm

Why don't you just show her YOUR Phd. She'll probably be jealous all the way to the bank

trondant June 3, 2011 at 4:46 pm

Possibly the only "college" in the US where the campus bookstore is a Spencer Gifts.

CivicHoliday June 4, 2011 at 7:39 am

No no silly, it's a "Torrid" – you have to cater to the plus-sized, remember?

jqpublick June 4, 2011 at 11:31 pm

There she is making all that money, ain't that a bitch. And there you are not making all that money. Lif just ain't fair. Man up and deal with it.

BlueStateLibel June 3, 2011 at 1:11 pm

Sun comes up, sun goes down, Ms. Eloquence herself mangling American history.

FlameCCT June 7, 2011 at 3:07 pm

While Mrs. Palin may not be eloquent, she did not mangle American history.

chascates June 3, 2011 at 1:11 pm

If she's not in the news her speaking fees drop. But if she speaks she exposes herself as an idiot.

user-of-owls June 3, 2011 at 1:19 pm

Which, perversely, increases the size of her crowds.

Oblios_Cap June 3, 2011 at 1:45 pm

Sort of a perverse version of the Prisoner's Dilemma.

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 2:31 pm

"If she's not in the news her speaking fees drop. But if she speaks she exposes herself as an idiot. "

What a good thing for her there are so many idiots willing to pay good money to listen to another idiot.

Jerri June 3, 2011 at 4:29 pm

It's what Sarah calls a "Catch-42"

user-of-owls June 3, 2011 at 4:45 pm

Oh, that was good. That was real good.

Jerri June 3, 2011 at 5:14 pm

Heh. Thanks.

Praise from Caesar, also.

Dashboard_Jesus June 4, 2011 at 2:29 am

kind of a cum-un-drum eh?

Negropolis June 4, 2011 at 3:14 am

Cummin' on drums, say you? Sounds kinky.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 12:47 pm

"But if she speaks she exposes herself as an idiot."

Which she then turns to her advantage by whining, "The smart kids are all pickin' on me!"

freakishlywrong June 3, 2011 at 1:11 pm

One if by bus, two if by hoverround.

baconzgood June 3, 2011 at 1:12 pm

History: Make it up as you go along.

Gopherit June 3, 2011 at 1:21 pm

Keep in mind, she appears to be home-schooling Piper. I am sure that will work out well for out future leader of Retardostan. Yes. I went there.

jqpublick June 4, 2011 at 11:52 pm

You need help!

BarryOPotter June 3, 2011 at 3:02 pm

History: Make it up as you go along.

Unfortunately, with this one, that also applies to the English language…

petehammer June 3, 2011 at 3:43 pm

Works for Michael Bay.

jqpublick June 4, 2011 at 11:27 pm

You hit the nail on the head. The President has done it consistantly since he took office.

Pithaughn June 3, 2011 at 1:12 pm

I hope my Aunt does not see this, it will literally kill her. She (my aunt ) was one of the original Title IX plaintiffs and fought for women's rights back when that would end your career. The fact that this Palin is considered a valid example of female leadership just makes her ( my aunt ) blood boil. This particular example of her ( Palin ) rank ignorance is potentially the worst/best example of her ability to bluff the low info voters/supporters with her word salad shtick.

Buckminster June 3, 2011 at 1:33 pm

No kidding. When is this woman going to STFU and quit making women in general look bad?????

Nopantsmcgee June 3, 2011 at 1:49 pm

Yeah, but she's not the only example Women have.

They got Michele Bachmann, too.

I'm sorry, ladies.

Pithaughn June 3, 2011 at 2:21 pm

Yes Bachmann, she is the one who could possibly attain a real following. Michelle, I think, truly believes what she is about, where as Palin is obviously in it for just herself. Bachmann would start a war to fulfill the doomsday prophecies of her branch of Christianity.

Dashboard_Jesus June 4, 2011 at 2:32 am

personally I think Bachmann's Xtain shtick is just as phony as $carah's but the Minnestoa nutjob just does CRAZY better

BarryOPotter June 3, 2011 at 3:06 pm

They got Michele Bachmann, too.

That was just uncalled for (said the guy squirting seltzer water out of his nose)!

mog253 June 3, 2011 at 2:55 pm

Hey, there are plenty of dumb ass males out there, we're entitled to some of our own, just NOT THIS ONE! Sorry, didn't mean to let my ladyness slip. heh.

petehammer June 3, 2011 at 3:46 pm

I dunno. It is a sort of progress. I think it is unfair to expect that all women/blacks/gays/etc in the limelight will be the best example. Look at us white dudes – whole lotta dumb asses (look at the current crop of Republican front runners). So, it is just statistics that you get Sarah Palin, Tyler Perry, and Perez Hilton. They're not doing any favors to their gender/race/sexual orientation, but hell, that's true for us white dudes too.

Geminisunmars June 3, 2011 at 4:53 pm

Yes, it is true equality now that not all women don't have to be smart and pretty. What? I feel like my brain has suddenly become Palinized.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 1:02 pm

"it is true equality now that not all women don't have to be smart and pretty"

I think it was Betty Friedan who said, "We'll have true equality when a female schlemiel can be as successful as a male schlemiel".

She's definitely got a point, but I doubt that she had W and Sarah in mind.

Geminisunmars June 4, 2011 at 1:38 pm

Who could imagine a W and an SP gaining any kind of traction, much less the kind of "success" they've enjoyed. But at least we got ourselves some equality. Silly me, I used to believe (I was young then) that when women had more power there'd be less war and more reproductive choice and support. Didn't Betty also say "Oy vey!"

Swampgas_Man June 3, 2011 at 9:02 pm

Y'all overlook the obvious; it's BECAUSE these people are pinheads that they succeed in selling to a stupidity-starved public. The scum also rises.

NorthStarSpanx June 3, 2011 at 11:14 pm

Ironically, Title IX is her only reference of record to positive feminism.

user-of-owls June 3, 2011 at 1:12 pm

Mildly Surprised:
She didn't say Revere was part of Feal Team Tif.

Wounded to the Core of My Very Soul:
Knowing that this, this…oh god, there are no words left…is able to cast a vote.

SexySmurf June 3, 2011 at 1:12 pm

Ringing those bells? Did she confuse Paul Revere with The Hunchback of Notre Dame. (Not the book. The cartoon version).

mavenmaven June 3, 2011 at 1:25 pm
SpurningBeer June 3, 2011 at 1:32 pm

The bells were on his bicycle. Duh.

AJWjr. June 3, 2011 at 1:46 pm

So Paul Revere was Mike Oldfield? Alrighty!

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 2:33 pm

I think she thought his horsey had the Liberty Bell around its neck.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 1:04 pm

"Ringing those bells? Did she confuse Paul Revere with The Hunchback of Notre Dame."

No, if only because she thinks the hunchback of Notre Dame is the same person as Nostradamus.

Bonzos_Bed_Time June 3, 2011 at 1:14 pm

So the bus trip took her up to Concord NH?
That's where this Revere guy made his fancy pots to sell at the Wal*mart, you betcha'.

Gopherit June 3, 2011 at 1:14 pm

FREEDUMB!!!

Maman June 3, 2011 at 1:32 pm

Remember that Freedumb isn't free. It was paid for with the blood of clever folks with well organized thoughts and goals working for something other than a payoff for themselves.

SheriffRoscoe June 3, 2011 at 1:16 pm

I know that we have a lot school teachers and college professors here as commenters on Wonkette (maybe that's the reason teabaggers hate us?)……Anyway! I'm wondering if any of you guys have seen that look before. You know, the look one of your more mentally challenged students has on her face when she's trying to bullshit you through an answer to one of her homework questions, and thinks she's actually pulling it off? I can't believe that smug, confident look can be on the face of someone soooooo stooooopiddddddd.

JoeBiteme June 3, 2011 at 1:19 pm

I'm no teacher, but that's precisely what I was just thinking. She has a look that says "I know this is total bullshit, but I have so little respect for you and everyone else watching that I'm just going to keep talking and assume you don't know either."

Sue4466 June 3, 2011 at 1:24 pm

Absolutely! That is exactly the look I recognized, I see it in class all the time. I don't fall for it then either.

LesPaultard June 3, 2011 at 1:25 pm

It's the same look I saw on Bush's face during the first debate with Algore.

freddymcmurray June 4, 2011 at 3:01 am

Totally. And while wearing his earpiece.

jqpublick June 4, 2011 at 11:12 pm

Is this the same Al Gore that invented the internet? Now there a mental giant if ever there was one.

Captain_Quark June 3, 2011 at 1:27 pm

You should see it in a logic class as the student says "Uh, the main logical operator in this formula is, like, the operator that is the one we call 'main' so here, uh, I'd say it is that one over there on the left. Also." It's good that guns are not allowed on campus, because I'd be sorely tempted to shoot some of the ignorant fucks for their own good.

Beowoof June 3, 2011 at 1:30 pm

Oh yes the look, of the willfully ignorant spouting their opinions when facts are needed. Yes, yes I have seen that look many times.

AutomaticPilot June 3, 2011 at 3:34 pm

It's that well-known "wolf in the helicopter lights" look.

prommie June 3, 2011 at 1:39 pm

Its the look of a sociopath.

Oblios_Cap June 3, 2011 at 1:47 pm

I've got some dim-witted coworkers who, not surprisingly, make sentences that sound a lot like hers except in a less irritating voice.

Dashboard_Jesus June 4, 2011 at 3:34 am

fucking WIN of the day (Night?) IMHO!

user-of-owls June 3, 2011 at 1:49 pm

Oh yes, that look. Did I tell you it is much more prevalent now than when I joined the faculty in 1990?

Look upon a culture that worships Palin and Snooki, ye intellectuals, and despair.

Doktor Zoom June 5, 2011 at 10:24 pm

Ozymandias warned uh, Kubla Khan that he wasn’t gonna be lookin’ at our mighty works, and, uh by sneering and frownin' at that wrinkled brow, and um, makin’ sure as he’s riding his horse and givin' that cold command that we were going to be sure and we were going to be free, and we were going to be armed. And so he left 'em without a leg to stand on, you bet!

ThankYouJeebus June 3, 2011 at 2:23 pm

I see whenever I watch America's Dumbest Home Videos.

GOPCrusher June 3, 2011 at 2:38 pm

Even Miss Teen South Carolina must be shaking her head in disbelief.

PsycWench June 3, 2011 at 3:59 pm

YES. Also we recognize the strung-together sentence construction of the completely clueless. A couple of our Phi Beta Kappa students were watching the interviews with Katie Couric and I explained to them that her answers were exactly like a test answer when the student was completely clueless but felt compelled to spit out an answer; also see Miss Teen South Carolina and maps.

kissawookiee June 3, 2011 at 4:11 pm

The level of conceptual mastery represented by any such answer is usually inversely proportional to the number of key words and unrelated participles strung together in a single, gloriously awful, runon sentence. Thank god the inability to divide the above by zero protects us from the event horizon of stupid she threatens to trigger every time she opens her mouth.

4TheTurnstiles June 3, 2011 at 4:34 pm

yes, it's called the Dunning-Krueger hypothesis and explains everything having to do with our great Tea Party patriots
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunning%E2%80%93Krug

lulzmonger June 4, 2011 at 1:24 pm

aka "My answer was PERFECT! Your QUESTION was wrong! Hah! I win!"

Dudleydidwrong June 5, 2011 at 12:53 am

I saw it many times in many classrooms. The difference is that, at least in top-level classes, the other students knew that this was "bullshit time" and you could see the smiles and nods and the hands up in the air. I hope that people in the US understand Palin's bullshit for what it is, but the knowledge level of many voters is about that of Palin herself. Many will say "She's right!" or "It doesn't matter, she's still right." Palin's bus trip is a fucking wave of stupidity washing over the land.

Jerry_Barry June 5, 2011 at 1:08 am

Yes, I know actually that look you are talking about! LOL. Great observation!
And something else wasn’t she in the North Church when she made this comment. Wouldn’t the answer be on one of the walls so she could read it? It would have been better for her to read it directly off the wall instead of bullshitting her way through with that weird look you mention in your comment.

mavenmaven June 3, 2011 at 1:16 pm

The Sarah Palin BullS$%& Bus! Coming to Foul Your City Soon!

Buzz Feedback June 3, 2011 at 1:17 pm

Who says junior college doesn't pay?

Sue4466 June 3, 2011 at 1:20 pm

The folks who teach there?

GOPCrusher June 3, 2011 at 2:39 pm

Cam Newton's Dad.

horsedreamer_1 June 4, 2011 at 11:37 am

WAR EAGLE comes to the WAR BLOG.

Gleem_McShineys June 3, 2011 at 2:41 pm

Benjamin Franklin said this, in 1776, when he and his wife, Kitty Hawk, flew the first electric kite over the address in Gettysburg where Lincoln shot state's rights.

BarryOPotter June 3, 2011 at 3:13 pm

Oh, but that I had more fists to give up to thee!

ProgressiveInga June 3, 2011 at 3:35 pm

That shit genuinely made me laugh out loud. Thank you sir/madam.

freddymcmurray June 4, 2011 at 3:04 am

Well done. Just the way I like my mooseburgers.

Negropolis June 4, 2011 at 2:14 am

Junior college. Ha! That bitch graduated from clown college. Let me rephrase that; she quit halfway through Clown U.

CrunchyKnee June 3, 2011 at 1:17 pm

"— if he was banging on bells and firing shots into the sky like some common Wasilla meth freak with a semi-automatic?"

Indeed!

Her dumbcuntyness never ceases to amaze, also too.

baconzgood June 3, 2011 at 1:18 pm

Today North Idaho Community College is proud.

102415 June 3, 2011 at 2:19 pm

Probably not so much.

trampndirtdown June 3, 2011 at 10:28 pm

No, no Baconz we are not.

Negropolis June 4, 2011 at 2:15 am

This solves Bush's rehetorical question of: Is our children learning?

Dudleydidwrong June 5, 2011 at 12:56 am

Except that some poor fuck of a history instructor (probably adjunct) is drowning his sorrows in a lot of good northwestern microbrews and hoping that no one comes up to him at a faculty meeting and says "Say, wasn't she one of your students?"

Sue4466 June 3, 2011 at 1:18 pm

"— if he was banging on bells and firing shots into the sky like some common Wasilla meth freak with a semi-automatic?"

FTW!

freakishlywrong June 3, 2011 at 1:18 pm

Is she insinuating that the Kenyan Muslin British were going to disabuse the Real Americans patriots of their second amendment rights? Holy fuck.

SmutBoffin June 3, 2011 at 1:19 pm

Listen 'tards and I'll get to tellin'
of the midnight ride of Sarah Palin
On the third of June, just this year
Some methbilly put shit in your ear
Who remembers that stupid yellin'?

weejee June 3, 2011 at 2:03 pm

From the whores of Bitchy Gloomee,
Of the spinning Big Faux Newzroom
Stood Downfister, the olde pruneface,
Pointing with a thumb down turned,
O'er the pointed wit of Wonkette,
To the purple clouds of Murdoch

trampndirtdown June 3, 2011 at 10:31 pm

Damn Oui I used to love that poem.

Jerry_Barry June 5, 2011 at 1:10 am

Very Good! Thank You!

randcoolcatdaddy June 3, 2011 at 1:20 pm

You know that mythological story about this guy who could turn water into wine, heal lepers, and rose from the dead?

It's people like Sarah Palin that created that myth.

biocurious June 3, 2011 at 1:24 pm

I don't think she'd add the parts of the story that involved charity, unconditional love, and forgiveness, though.

Karma_Suture June 3, 2011 at 5:12 pm

… A rose from the dead.

I like it.

KommunistKitty June 3, 2011 at 1:20 pm

Every time a bell rings, a handgun gets its wings.

AJWjr. June 3, 2011 at 1:55 pm

I think $arah took carillon at Northern Idaho Community College. Which is probably dangerously close to the University of Southern North Dakota at Hoople.

Negropolis June 4, 2011 at 2:20 am

Are we sure she didn't attend Northern South Carolina State at Blurgh or the University of Eastern West Virginia at Voisian?

AJWjr. June 4, 2011 at 9:36 am

I don't think she had a passport back then, so maybe wouldn't have been allowd to travel there?

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 1:12 pm

"University of Southern North Dakota at Hoople"

I'm assuming you made this up, and I don't know what a "hoople" is, but it's a perfect word, place, or food for Lou Sarah.

flamingpdog June 6, 2011 at 12:27 am

Sarahgenia in Brooklyn!

NYNYNY June 3, 2011 at 10:54 pm

"Hmm…it's someone patriotic from history doing something of importance…he must having been yelling like an idiot, running around shooting a gun" is what she was thinking as she answered the question. Piper is thinking "Oh God, she's really cocking this up."

Barb June 3, 2011 at 1:20 pm

The downfister is coming! They are going to take away our guns. I am ringing the bell for our freedumbs!

El Pinche June 3, 2011 at 2:08 pm

Every time he comes over here i sneak over to his place to bang his sister/mom.

102415 June 3, 2011 at 2:22 pm

Say hi to her. I like to wait until 3 AM.

El Pinche June 3, 2011 at 2:40 pm

We can switch times tomorrow. It's no fair having sloppy seconds everyday.

Fare la Volpe June 3, 2011 at 5:50 pm

Or you can double team her. On Downfisty's race car bed.

trampndirtdown June 3, 2011 at 10:33 pm

Get your shoes out from underneath her bed those fuckers stink.

AJWjr. June 3, 2011 at 2:52 pm

I'm not sure Pete Seeger had this in mind when he wrote that song, but OK.

tihond June 3, 2011 at 1:20 pm

I would watch a show called "Sarah Palin Explains US History." Where, without research, she would tell what happened at various points in our history…

For example: "The Civil War was started because the North wanted to force the South to abort all of their babies, and also."

Selfish_T June 3, 2011 at 2:29 pm

"…and then Bill Ayers shot Ronald Reagan to try to impress Michelle Obama…"

phlox✔ June 3, 2011 at 3:44 pm

This reminds me of a long ago SNL skit with Janeane Garofalo as "Time Traveling B-Minus History Student" or some such.
Crux: She had such a tenuous grasp of American history, every time she went back in time she made thing much, much worse.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 1:16 pm

"For example: "The Civil War was started because the North wanted to force the South to abort all of their babies, and also.""

Silly person. That was the Wimmenz Libberz with the aborted babbys. The Civil War was to force the South to let the n*****s take over.

Jerry_Barry June 5, 2011 at 1:12 am

Doesn't Alaska book stores sell those books; "HIstory for Dummies?"

JustPixelz June 5, 2011 at 8:55 am

I'd love to hear her account of the Boston Tea Party..

The colonists wanted the tea that the British death panels had outlawed, so they went to the .. um .. ship to get it anyway because .. um .. government takeover of the tea companies was against the Constitution.

Come here a minute June 3, 2011 at 1:21 pm

Listen my children, and let me tell ya
About a Snowbilly Grifter who came from Wasilla.

freakishlywrong June 3, 2011 at 1:21 pm

She's drunk there, right?

user-of-owls June 3, 2011 at 1:24 pm

I, for one, really, really don't want to know the answer to that question. The ramifications are mortifying.

Buckminster June 3, 2011 at 1:39 pm

Nopers, drunk doesn't go anywhere far enough to explain tha extreme stupidity.

donner_froh June 3, 2011 at 2:47 pm

That used to be my explanation/excuse for saying really dumb stuff–"I was drunk at the time" but it only works about once a year. To account for the Palin level of stupidity she would have to be putting away at least a fifth per day for 10 years.

FNMA June 3, 2011 at 2:57 pm

I think that level of intoxication would be lethal.
At least to humans.

WVUer21 June 3, 2011 at 7:29 pm

She's drunk with dumbassness.

trampndirtdown June 3, 2011 at 10:37 pm

Welcome.

AJWjr. June 5, 2011 at 3:42 pm

That was my excuse for around 20 years, too.

comrad_darkness June 6, 2011 at 6:49 am

I was going with high on meth.

littlebigdaddy June 3, 2011 at 1:21 pm

He also was the subject of the first great work of American portraiture. Some people have all the luck.

neiltheblaze June 3, 2011 at 1:21 pm

Goddamn, I didn't even know the Tundra Twit was even in town. I am really loving this "visiting the historical sights" tour – where she looks at the statues, but still walks away not knowing the first friggin' thing about the actual history.

This numbskull isn't even teachable.

AJWjr. June 3, 2011 at 1:36 pm

Please. Those are statutes.

neiltheblaze June 3, 2011 at 2:08 pm

In that clip she's repealing Paul Revere's Statute then?

[redacted]hse June 3, 2011 at 4:29 pm

Hey, Neil- I'm in the Historic Lexington-Concord area, but I'm gonna bet she won't show up around here. She'll head straight to AZ for some R&R after this shit.

neiltheblaze June 3, 2011 at 4:41 pm

If she does, I hope she gets stuck in traffic on Route 2 for a couple of hours. She'd stop at Walden Pond, but that Thoreau feller was a commie.

ArmoredBore June 3, 2011 at 1:21 pm

…are you sure that's how it goes? Or who said it?

…eh, nevermind, sounds right.

CapeClod June 3, 2011 at 1:22 pm

She should really hire someone to hit her in the head with a shovel whenever she goes off on one these thought odysseys.

user-of-owls June 3, 2011 at 1:25 pm

Hire? With a line of volunteers that stretches beyond the moon?

Ken Layne June 3, 2011 at 1:28 pm

Talk about your unpaid internships ….

CapeClod June 3, 2011 at 1:32 pm

Perhaps I'm just projecting. I long for a job that I look forward to doing everyday.

Steverino247 June 3, 2011 at 1:34 pm

"Wire the Governor and tell him I said (CLANG!) OW!"

Pithaughn June 3, 2011 at 1:40 pm

I like "thought odyssey". Please compare and contrast with one of Dr. Einstein's thought experiments. Be sure to include reference to an event horizon. Based on the data so far presented , Palin must be getting close to a black hole of some sort. The tidal forces in her brain are increasing in the expected inverse squared pattern.

tessiee June 3, 2011 at 7:02 pm

"She should really hire someone to hit her in the head with a shovel whenever"

fxt

user-of-owls June 3, 2011 at 1:22 pm

Apparently, they migrate north for the summer.

Oblios_Cap June 3, 2011 at 1:47 pm

And become more resistant to antibiotics.

user-of-owls June 3, 2011 at 2:37 pm

I thought she was pro-biotics.

teebob2000 June 3, 2011 at 1:22 pm

And it won't make a fucking bit of difference.

DustBowlBlues June 3, 2011 at 2:56 pm

The dumber she is, the more her adoring fans love her.

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 3:03 pm

Because "she's just like us"…

Wilcoxyz June 3, 2011 at 1:22 pm

So what this Jefferson dude was saying was that we need some cool rules here, pronto. Or we'll just be bogus, too.

trampndirtdown June 3, 2011 at 10:48 pm

You Dick!

4TheTurnstiles June 3, 2011 at 1:23 pm

Teabaggers will only love her more for this, you know. She is indeed one of theirs.

Buckminster June 3, 2011 at 1:44 pm

Fatheaded, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, Sarah.

102415 June 3, 2011 at 2:04 pm

Downfister is back from lunch. Fixed.

Gleem_McShineys June 3, 2011 at 3:20 pm

It's not exactly "no way to go through life" anymore. The argument can be made that going that way actually earns you quite a bit of dough and fame.

When did we transition to "Land of Derpportunity"

GOPCrusher June 3, 2011 at 2:47 pm

Bible Spice is a victim of "gotcha" history.

SayItWithWookies June 3, 2011 at 1:24 pm

It's like the Republican leadership all got together to analyze why the Dubya administration was such a failure and concluded that he was too bright for his own good, so they came up with Sarah Palin, a walking, talking abortion of basic knowledge.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 1:24 pm

I like to think of her as the part in the Venn diagram where "stupid", "mean-spirited", and "whorey" all intersect, but "walking, talking abortion of basic knowledge" is real good, too.

Ruhe June 3, 2011 at 1:25 pm

The fact that Sarah Palin's prodigious stupidity/vapidity density is not sufficient to overcome the Columb barrier and thus result in a Palin singularity gives us cause to think that the entire Quantum Theory of Gravity may be flawed at some deep level. Either that or God hates us all.

finallyhappy June 3, 2011 at 1:25 pm

Send me a 2 pack of the cream/jam scones from Tesco- I don't drink- but afternoon tea is a super idea

Steverino247 June 3, 2011 at 1:26 pm

Important personality is quoted: http://www.hark.com/clips/nsvdjzkfdz-what-a-maroo

Sharkey June 3, 2011 at 1:26 pm

Isn't it about time to change up that picture?

Pithaughn June 3, 2011 at 1:46 pm

Check me if I'm wrong Sandy, but his gramps fondling his nip there?

Pres[EXTERMINATE!!] June 3, 2011 at 2:59 pm

Sarah needz moar Star of David-wearing opportunities.

trampndirtdown June 3, 2011 at 10:50 pm

Hooray for PonyPals.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 1:26 pm

I have a new life goal:
I want to be Popper's therapist.
Five sessions a week, I figure I'll retire rich at the end of a year.

Sharkey June 4, 2011 at 2:45 pm

You'll have to come out of retirement when she hits puberty.

Doktor Zoom June 5, 2011 at 10:08 pm

God…in 15 years or so, just imagine the revenge memoir that girl's going to write!

Negropolis June 6, 2011 at 12:23 am

I love how they described her as a "human shield" That is about as accurate a description as what I've seen as to how she uses Piper. Trig is a prop and Piper is a shield. She keeps her nearby so that no reporter would dare to try and embarrass her in front of her young child. Obviously, that doesn't always work.

Tundra Grifter June 3, 2011 at 1:27 pm

Cherokee People!

SheriffRoscoe June 3, 2011 at 1:28 pm

Is that her dad in the end of the video? Yep. That look of "that's my girl!" pride.

weejee June 3, 2011 at 1:28 pm

How many blunts did Lou Sarah smoke with the Donald after their Armenian pizza party?

SmutBoffin June 3, 2011 at 1:28 pm

PAUL REVERE TWEETED LITHOGRAPHS OF HIS DONG TO JOHNNY TREMAINE

Tundra Grifter June 3, 2011 at 1:30 pm

First Duh Guv'Nor gets it wrong with the "Ring My Bell" thing and then, with nothing else to say, doubles down and repeats it. Just so everyone is sure she has no idea what she's talking about.

What the L? Michele thought Concord was in New Hampshire. Now this.

PS: I see the Chuck Norris downfister is at work here. Please do your best to fight the forces of reactionary historical revisionism! We don't need no stinkin Lou Sarah here!

trampndirtdown June 3, 2011 at 10:53 pm

I really don't blame her(Sarah) for misspeaking, it can happen to anyone, what gets me is her ignorant unbending "no I'm right and you're wrong" mentality.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 1:30 pm

Good observation.

I've known people who are… perhaps not terribly bright, but in general they're good people, not hateful shitheads like Sarah.

Sarah, like W before her and Raygun before him, is AGGRESSIVELY ignorant.
When confronted with facts or knowledge of any kind, her reaction is to plug her fingers into her ears and sing "LA LA LA LA I CAN'T HEAR YOU!!!"

Maman June 3, 2011 at 1:30 pm

Can't wait until she starts looking for green colored boys in the mountains of Vermont!

DashboardBuddha June 3, 2011 at 1:59 pm

She'll be disappointed until she gets the White Mountains of NH.

Maman June 3, 2011 at 3:45 pm

She ain't never going to Black Hills of SD then… Who knew that Mount Rushmore was in the hood?

DashboardBuddha June 3, 2011 at 3:58 pm

My name is Rosie V
and I'm here to say
they gonna carve my face
on a motherfuckin' mountain one day

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 1:31 pm

"She ain't never going to Black Hills of SD"

Is that why they're the Badlands?
["That's right; we bad" *struts*]

AJWjr. June 3, 2011 at 2:00 pm

Too much copper makes you turn green, right?

MinAgain June 3, 2011 at 1:30 pm

That man was a poet.

user-of-owls June 3, 2011 at 1:32 pm

You know what really pisses me off? The anchor, that's what.

"…but it sounds like she got a little confused." *mild grin*

Yup. That's all he goes with. Just, "a little confused." Not HOWARD FUCKING BEALE.

And we wonder why this rapacious hate-monster's name can be uttered in the same fucking sentence as "presidential candidate."

My day just got a lot suckier.

freakishlywrong June 3, 2011 at 1:46 pm

But, but but..crotches! Twitttering crotch shots and Demonraps!

June_Cleaver2.0 June 3, 2011 at 2:15 pm

Hey, I like Anthony Weiner better because of that pic!

weejee June 3, 2011 at 2:29 pm

Idjets breed like bunnies, PhDs not so much. If we continue this way in forty years folks may be nostalgic for Palin's intellect.

/runs to the roof and leaps from the parapet

user-of-owls June 3, 2011 at 2:40 pm

What the fuck you tryin' to do, Weej, hasten our doom?? Get yer ass back down from the roof right this minute.

Oh, and procreate, goddamit.

FNMA June 3, 2011 at 3:04 pm

The only proper response from the anchor would have been: What the fuck was that?

GOPCrusher June 3, 2011 at 4:50 pm

We also would accept: And people would vote for her?

[redacted]hse June 3, 2011 at 4:33 pm

What the world needs now is H.L.Mencken.

Sheesko June 3, 2011 at 5:25 pm

I'd settle for someone who even recognizes the name. :(

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 1:35 pm

Wasn't it Mr. Mencken who said that no one ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American public?

Pretty on-point in this context, whoever said it.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 1:33 pm

Meh [shrug] It's not a big college town.

MinAgain June 3, 2011 at 1:32 pm

Was Paul Revere an undocumented immigrant? Hey, I'm just asking a question.

horsedreamer_1 June 4, 2011 at 11:45 am

Like Barack Hussein Obama, Revere was born a subject of the British crown. So, if nothing else, his presence in the Massachusetts Bay Colony was, at the least, as an anchor-baby.

gef05 June 3, 2011 at 1:33 pm

The press playing gotcha history again.

Beowoof June 3, 2011 at 1:33 pm

“A fool and his money are soon elected”.
~Will Rogers

You can fool some of the people all the time, and those are the ones you want to concentrate on”.
~George W. Bush

The Bush quote on fools, I do believe exposes Sarah's election strategy. The Will Rogers quotes scares me into thinking it could happen.

SayItWithWookies June 3, 2011 at 1:34 pm

Only if she gets pregnant again.

SheriffRoscoe June 3, 2011 at 2:26 pm

I see what you did there.

MiniMencken June 3, 2011 at 1:34 pm

I think this little "women's suffrage" experiment has gone on long enough! The results speak for themselves.

Geminisunmars June 3, 2011 at 5:35 pm

Hey hey! Watch it, Buddy. There are plenty dumbass mens too, ya know.

Eve8Apples June 3, 2011 at 9:10 pm

Don't forget it was Mr. Johnny McCain who lured the twit from the frozen tundra out of her trailer and unleashed her crazy on the rest of us.

freddymcmurray June 4, 2011 at 3:10 am

Never. Forget.

MiniMencken June 4, 2011 at 10:25 am

What part of "snark" don't you understand?

VespulaMaculata June 3, 2011 at 1:35 pm

" … their [The Tea Party] biggest national superstar is Sarah Palin, who by all appearances is so drastically stupid that she couldn't figure out how to pour piss out of a boot if there were directions on the heel. " – William Rivers Pitt, September 2010

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 1:36 pm

You and Mr. Pitt are giving her way too much credit to assume that she would know in the first place that a boot shouldn't be full of piss.

user-of-owls June 3, 2011 at 1:35 pm

*Clip Ends*

"And that, children, is why it is never a good idea to dabble in Do-It-Yourself Trepanation."

Geminisunmars June 3, 2011 at 5:37 pm

This site is such a great vocabulary builder.

flamingpdog June 6, 2011 at 12:55 am

Is Trepanation one of her chilluns?

jaytingle June 3, 2011 at 1:35 pm

If Revere had been a goldsmith rather than a silversmith she would have nailed it.

Steverino247 June 3, 2011 at 1:37 pm

Get thee to a neurologist!

Rosie_Scenario June 3, 2011 at 1:37 pm

Poor Piper looks miserable on her "vacation." And where is Trig? In the bus storage bin?

Lucidamente1 June 3, 2011 at 1:54 pm

Jack Stuef is babysitting him.

fuflans June 3, 2011 at 2:30 pm

somebody on NPR yesterday said piper whined the entire time, asking when they could leave.

poor kid. good thing she'll grow up with sound values and grifter genes.

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 3:09 pm

Any bets that poor little thing will be a cutter within 3-4 years?

Before she grows up and goes on to bigger and better dysfunctions, that is.

Unless somebody steps up and actually lovingly parents her! Somebody? Anybody? Come on, Wasilla!

GOPCrusher June 3, 2011 at 3:18 pm

I'll go with she guts it out until she graduates high school, then pens a novel of her childhood life that will make Mommy Dearest look like a Dr. Spock child rearing how-to.

horsedreamer_1 June 4, 2011 at 11:46 am

At least Truman Capote is dead, so no one will suggest he ghostwrote it.

[redacted]hse June 3, 2011 at 4:35 pm

Trig is in Arizona with his mother.

Geminisunmars June 3, 2011 at 5:39 pm

zinnnngggg

Negropolis June 6, 2011 at 12:17 am

You are horrible.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 1:37 pm

"where is Trig? In the bus storage bin?"

Superglued to the roof along with Mitt Romney's dog.

flamingpdog June 6, 2011 at 12:59 am

Truly sick, but I SO wish I could upfist it multiple times!

SheriffRoscoe June 3, 2011 at 1:38 pm

So are we all in agreement? The GOP should definitely annoint this woman "Candidate For President."

UpfistFairy June 3, 2011 at 2:01 pm

But I thought Jesus wanted Crazy Eyes Bachmann. Or can god not even tell one grifter from another at this point?

AJWjr. June 3, 2011 at 2:19 pm

Belief in the trinity makes them all particularly sucky at maths.

trampndirtdown June 3, 2011 at 11:01 pm

God hates Bachman for not having all 23 kids herself.

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 6:25 pm

President of what, for God's sake?

Jerri June 3, 2011 at 7:20 pm

"Candidate" looks awfully close to "Canadian" to your average half-literate teabagger. They should probably go with "American for President."

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 1:40 pm

"The GOP should definitely annoint this woman "Candidate For President." "

Agree wholeheartedly.
Wait.
By "anoint", you DO mean "urinate on en masse", don't you?

freakishlywrong June 3, 2011 at 1:39 pm

This is one idiot who really needs a handler, I know she's Rogue and all, but I think even Weepy or whatever perennially embarrassed Palin child that is, was trying to get out of the shot.

DerrickWildcat June 3, 2011 at 1:39 pm

She's ready for Jeopardy

Buckminster June 3, 2011 at 1:43 pm

Heck, she's not ready for Wheel of Fortune or Let's Make A Deal.

DerrickWildcat June 3, 2011 at 1:48 pm

Ok, maybe she should start off with Card Sharks.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 1:41 pm

Win Ben Stein's Money!

SayItWithWookies June 3, 2011 at 1:51 pm

Provided she goes up against Wolf Blitzer and a cheese Danish.

AJWjr. June 3, 2011 at 2:02 pm

Somehow, she'd mangle it up to be a cheesewolf blintz.

BarackMyWorld June 3, 2011 at 3:28 pm

I'll take The Penis Mightier, Trebek.

AJWjr. June 3, 2011 at 7:27 pm

Famous The Rapists for $100, Trebek.

Steverino247 June 3, 2011 at 3:34 pm

I'll take Alaskan Grifters for President, Alex.

AutomaticPilot June 3, 2011 at 5:00 pm

"Forget it. Just write a number, any number."

Threve.

horsedreamer_1 June 4, 2011 at 11:49 am

Will Ferrell as Trebek: You commonly drink water from one of these.

[Darrell Hammond as Connery buzzes in]

Trebek: Sean Connery, yes…

Connery: A leather glover.

Trebek: No. That is incorrect.

[Molly Shannon as Minnie Driver buzzes in]

Trebek: Yes? Minnie Driver…

Driver: A toilet!

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 2:12 pm
Negropolis June 6, 2011 at 12:18 am

Put her up against Watson, pleazes.

mavenmaven June 3, 2011 at 1:39 pm

Will these hostile questions from the lamestream media never end?

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 6:28 pm

Sure! As soon as you shut the fuck up and ram your fucking empty skull into a glacial crevasse. Or into a stucco wall. I don't care which.

Tundra Grifter June 3, 2011 at 8:08 pm

It's just another gotcha – as in, "Lady – you gotcha facts all wong!"

gef05 June 3, 2011 at 1:40 pm

I guess she has her own version of the "I'm with stupid" t-shirt. One where the arrow points straight up.

Oblios_Cap June 3, 2011 at 1:42 pm

But she's just so fuckin' Presidential!

GOPCrusher June 3, 2011 at 2:24 pm

And Mavericky!

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 2:26 pm

And morony!

Boehneriffic June 3, 2011 at 3:18 pm

And now I'd like to entertain everyone with some fancy pageant walkin'.

DemmeFatale June 3, 2011 at 5:42 pm

The Palin version of: "now watch this drive."

tessiee June 3, 2011 at 6:29 pm

Just don't expect her to chew gum at the same time.

iburl June 3, 2011 at 1:43 pm

"It started way back in history
With Adrock, M.C.A., and me – Mike D.
Been had a little horsy named Paul Revere
Just me and my horsy and a quart of beer
Riding across the land, kicking up sand
Sheriff's posse on my tail cause I'm in demand"

I'm pretty sure this is her only information on Paul Revere.

Respitetini June 3, 2011 at 3:00 pm

Nah. I'm pretty sure she stays away from all that "Urban" music.

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 6:31 pm

Oh, I think she brags about being oh so cool with all the rap stuff. Didn't she twatter something about that during the squawkathon by rightards over that Urban fellow, Common, coming in the front door of the WHITE House?

UpFistTroll June 3, 2011 at 10:27 pm

The Beastie Boys are far less "urban" than many others, though, so perhaps they'd be okay by her.

horsedreamer_1 June 4, 2011 at 11:50 am

Plus, Jews.

I think Lou Sarah should add a Volkswagen logo chain to go with her Star of David.

trampndirtdown June 3, 2011 at 11:04 pm

Beasties were closer than she was.

BarackMyWorld June 3, 2011 at 1:45 pm

I'm afraid to click on the video because of the effect it might have on my own I.Q.

tessiee June 6, 2011 at 12:29 am

It won't do your eardrums any favors, either.

PabaBritannica June 3, 2011 at 1:47 pm

And that, children, is how we beat the Spaniards at Bunker Hill and won the gold medal in hockey.

Oblios_Cap June 3, 2011 at 1:48 pm

and wanted more.

Lascauxcaveman June 3, 2011 at 1:49 pm

That elitist teevee news guy was having way too much fun with this.

It would have been more fun if they framed the interview camera from her chin to her navel. And muted the sound.

Lucidamente1 June 3, 2011 at 1:49 pm

"Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!"

DashboardBuddha June 3, 2011 at 1:52 pm

Forget it, she's rolling.

genxr June 3, 2011 at 2:07 pm

(to everyone who voted Republican) "Look, you fucked up. You trusted us."

Tundra Grifter June 3, 2011 at 8:08 pm

Yeh – as in rolling over…

AJWjr. June 3, 2011 at 2:21 pm

Now I understand her sudden need for a road trip.

J Rbt. Oppenheiner June 3, 2011 at 1:50 pm

Can someone cue up keyboard cat to this soliloquy?

Selfish_T June 3, 2011 at 2:34 pm

Maybe Yakety Sax.

[redacted]hse June 3, 2011 at 4:54 pm
user-of-owls June 3, 2011 at 1:54 pm

Rather curious that the clip brought to mind "Life Reeked With Joy."
http://www.wilsonquarterly.com/article.cfm?AID=11

A small sample:
Germany was displaced after WWI. This gave rise to Hitler. Germany was morbidly overexcited and unbalanced. Berlin became the decadent capital, where all forms of sexual deprivations were practised. A hugeanti-semantic movement arose. Attractive slogans like”death to all Jews” were used by governmental groups. Hitler remilitarized the Rineland over a squirmish between Germany and France. The appeasers were blinded by the great red of the Soviets. Moosealini rested his foundations on eight million bayonets and invaded Hi Lee Salasy. Germany invaded Poland, France invaded Belgium, and Russia invaded everybody. War screeched to an end when a nukuleer explosion was dropped on Heroshima. A whole generation had been wipe out in two world wars, and their forlorne families were left to pick up the peaces.

NewYorkJew June 3, 2011 at 2:01 pm

It's the "squirmish" thing …

user-of-owls June 3, 2011 at 2:38 pm

I smell a trademark suit!

horsedreamer_1 June 4, 2011 at 11:52 am

The presence of a Korean on the throne in Ethiopia should lend one pause when considering the Peninsula, in the pre-war era, an Hermit Kingdom. Clearly, they were colonizers.

June_Cleaver2.0 June 3, 2011 at 1:54 pm

I'm surprised she didn't mention that Paul Revere rode so we could have that Statute of Liberty.

Romney must be sticking pins in his eyes.

[redacted]hse June 3, 2011 at 7:29 pm

Paul Revere rode so we wouldn't have to.
But she will anyway.

Mort_Sinclair June 3, 2011 at 1:54 pm

What yer watchin' there is the result of the time Jed and Granny had to leave Jethro and Ellie May alone overnight.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 3:15 pm

^
Despite your personal description, you, Sir, win the Nobel Prize for this comment.

PuckStopsHere June 3, 2011 at 1:56 pm

I don't know what happened, but I love my country again. How could you not? We are adorable. Who else would put this blithering idiot on a TV screen? God, I LOVE this place.

[redacted]hse June 4, 2011 at 10:42 pm

I love this place,too, especially my new friends Randle and Nurse Ratched.

PuckStopsHere June 4, 2011 at 10:56 pm

Well I don't wanna break up the meeting or nothin', but she's somethin' of a cunt, ain't she Doc?

pinkocommi June 3, 2011 at 1:56 pm

Remember when lots of Americans didn't want to vote for Al Gore for President because he sounded too smart? Sarah Lou is the opposite of that, which means of course that she will get elected.

Dumbedup June 3, 2011 at 1:56 pm

It's not that she is dumb. It is not that she is dumb and cocky. It's that people pay to hear her speak. The implications of that fact are immense.

GOPCrusher June 3, 2011 at 3:24 pm

It's that people defend her for saying stupid shit. And that's even worse.

Steverino247 June 3, 2011 at 3:38 pm

Indeed, you're right!

Anybody got the phone number to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention?

Trollina Dumbass June 3, 2011 at 1:58 pm

One thing she hasn't been doing, since the whole society drop-out thing is LEARNING AMERICAN HISTORY! I bet she still hasn't even read the CliffsNotes version of the Constitution nor the Declaration of independence. And this is what the Teapublicans want to represent the country?

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 6:34 pm

"And this is what the Teapublicans want to represent the country?"

All together now, "But she's just like us!" (Dumb as a stump, in other words.)

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 3:16 pm

Also, she's fapping material for a lot of them.

smashaduck June 3, 2011 at 1:58 pm

Bible Spice, what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.

trampndirtdown June 3, 2011 at 11:09 pm

Marco.

smashaduck June 4, 2011 at 10:32 am

Polo.

Poindexter718 June 3, 2011 at 1:58 pm

Sure that sounded a bit "off the cuff," but Barry Hussein Obama sometimes uses a teleprompter while giving a speech.

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 3:18 pm

And so does everyone else, but the thing is, he teleprompters while black! And his middle name is HUSSEIN. And he's uppity (i.e., smarter than a dumbass white person like me).

JustPixelz June 3, 2011 at 2:00 pm

Given the way TP'ers revere the revolutionary era with their tricorn hats and "don't tread on me" and "ready your armies" … well, Sarah Palin™ has committed the unforgivable* sin of getting history wrong.
________________
* just kidding, they're already updating textbooks in Texas to her version of events

prommie June 3, 2011 at 3:17 pm

Its OK to be wrong, if your version of wrong confirms your bigotry and hate and justifies your crimes.

Sheesko June 3, 2011 at 5:32 pm

Oh, I'm pretty sure Texas already took care of that. W prolly sent her the resulting text to bone up for her trip.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 3:18 pm

W prolly "sent her a bone" resulting in at least one "appendectomy" to take care of that.

fxd

Oblios_Cap June 3, 2011 at 2:02 pm

Didn't Bob Dylan write "Idiot Wind" knowing that $arah would appear on the scene one day?

carlgt1 June 3, 2011 at 2:02 pm

there is no snarky comment worthy of this – Sarah Palin has become a parody of herself….

Limeylizzie June 3, 2011 at 2:03 pm

To be fair, I have not much clue about Paul Revere either, but I could have sounded intelligent as I waffled my way through an 'explanantion" and I would never be caught dead with that ghastly shade of pink blush.

AJWjr. June 3, 2011 at 2:28 pm

Also, that hat.

102415 June 3, 2011 at 2:38 pm

Lizzie, should we call an ambulance or shake your hand?

user-of-owls June 3, 2011 at 2:42 pm

Your p's have flown away. You know what this means?

IntenseDebate is in the pocket of Big Revere.

mrblifil June 3, 2011 at 2:57 pm

This too happened to me, when lo my pee-ness was struck full sore. But it got better, like the guy who was turned into a newt through witchery.

user-of-owls June 3, 2011 at 4:41 pm

As was mine, only to rise from the dead three days later.

Ergo, P is Jesus.

mrblifil June 3, 2011 at 2:55 pm

But surely you must know something about when the British are coming.

BarackMyWorld June 3, 2011 at 3:30 pm

You'd also have the brains to stop talking before you embarrassed yourself, though.

Nopantsmcgee June 3, 2011 at 2:03 pm

Jesus! God, the Stupid just drips off of her….

How in the hell can anyone fuck up the Paul Revere fable???? I mean come on it's been dumbed down to Idiot Level 1 and she still can't get it right.

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 3:21 pm

The Stupid drips off her her? It sprays off of her like every water leak from every pipe and hull separation on every submarine movie ever made

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 3:21 pm

Despite how many fingers she's had stuck in heragggggghhhhhh…

*dies from grossout*

genxr June 3, 2011 at 2:04 pm

Did she just say Paul Revere "Warned the British?"

102415 June 3, 2011 at 2:23 pm

Yep. Technically she was right like a stopped clock.

weejee June 3, 2011 at 2:33 pm

Scolded them mightily, he did, and threatened to bang them over the head with a RevereWare omelet pan if they misbehaved.

ChessieNefercat June 4, 2011 at 12:03 pm

"Did she just say Paul Revere "Warned the British?" "

Yes. Yes, she did.

timbo71351 June 3, 2011 at 2:04 pm

Just think, 30% of the population wants that woman running the country and handling foreign policy.

neiltheblaze June 3, 2011 at 2:24 pm

And access to the nuclear codes.

GOPCrusher June 3, 2011 at 3:28 pm

I think it's more like 30% of people that vote. I would probably slash my wrists if I honestly believed it was 30% of the entire population.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 3:22 pm

30% of the population thinks that woman is a running cunt.

fxd

comrad_darkness June 4, 2011 at 5:29 pm

Because she makes them feel good about themselves. You must admit, that's likely a pretty damn rare thing.

AJWjr. June 3, 2011 at 2:04 pm

So you want him to choke on his own vomit, then?

El Pinche June 3, 2011 at 2:04 pm

The folks in the background in the video exactly represent her supporters: not paying attention to her mouth (just her tits), wondering "I hope get my medicare deposited this week", and standing in the buffet line.

SheriffRoscoe June 3, 2011 at 2:14 pm

She was givin' a his'try lesson. They ain't got no use for that.

mourningnmerica June 3, 2011 at 4:23 pm

Pinche, I just noticed the zero p. Seriously, what happened?

Sassomatic June 3, 2011 at 2:07 pm

Not smarter than a 5th grader.

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 3:23 pm

Not smarter than a zygote.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 3:23 pm

Hell, she's not even smarter than Jeff Foxworthy.

ingloriousbytch June 3, 2011 at 2:07 pm

She forgot the "such as" and "whatnot."

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 3:24 pm

Which is why she probably thinks she did such a swell job. Also too.

Sassomatic June 3, 2011 at 2:08 pm

Was he the guy with the coonskin cap?

SheriffRoscoe June 3, 2011 at 2:26 pm

That was Davy Crocker.

102415 June 3, 2011 at 2:40 pm

That was Davy Hot Crocker.

user-of-owls June 3, 2011 at 2:46 pm

You're both wrong. It was his son, Rockefeller "Fulla" Crock.

genxr June 3, 2011 at 4:05 pm

The Crock Brothers?

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 3:24 pm

???

I thought it was Pat Boone.

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 3:25 pm

"Was he the guy with the coonskin cap? "

In Sarah's world, yes, yes, he was. And he kilt him a bar with a silver teapot.

Dr_Zoidberg June 3, 2011 at 3:32 pm

No, he was the guy what raised the flag at the Alamo to celebrate the Louisiana Purchase after Lewis and Clark bought it from the Spaniards in exchange for the Fountain of Youth.

KeepFnThatChicken June 3, 2011 at 2:09 pm

I laughed heartily at your glamorous — yet earnest — post. I winced in pain, suddenly, knowing that there's still diesel in the tank for the climb that remains.

Allmighty_Manos June 3, 2011 at 2:15 pm

At least she knew who Sam Adams was : "Brewer, Patriot"

Sassomatic June 3, 2011 at 2:16 pm

You know what? Let's just elect this cunt President and nuke ourselves. I can't take it anymore.

mourningnmerica June 3, 2011 at 4:19 pm

Take me now, Reagan.

DerrickWildcat June 3, 2011 at 2:16 pm

Fox News: Liberals expect Sarah to know everything!
Oh, and Bill Clinton got a blow Job.

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 6:40 pm

Our standards have declined. We expect Sarah to know something, anything.

Actually, no we don't.

UpFistTroll June 3, 2011 at 10:26 pm

You don't understand. This is good news for Sarah Palin. How, you ask? Simple: she isn't usin' no fancy-ass librul talk. She's sputterin' and gibberin' just like y'all down thar in the trailer park.

Today's American wants a President that is at least as inarticulate and cowfuckingly stupid as he or she is, and Sarah is just living up to that promise.

ChessieNefercat June 4, 2011 at 12:08 pm

"cowfuckingly stupid"

I like this.

spinozasgod June 3, 2011 at 2:18 pm

maybe it would be forgiven if she was out in wassiland walking her honey badger and some random MSM person snuck up on her and asked to tell the story of Paul Revere, but she knew where she was and what she was going to talk about and she still didn't even bother to look it up on wikipedia for dogs sake!

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 3:28 pm

She didn't even have to look it up on Wikipedia, for Gawd's sake. All she had to do was read Page 1 (under the picture) of whatever little informative tourist brochure it was that had to have been within 25 FUCKING FEET OF HER!!!

KeepFnThatChicken June 3, 2011 at 2:21 pm

I don't mean to break stride here, everyone, but my chest is pounding in laughter from this post today. I am touch-typing because my eyes are too tear-logged to see. My chest is tight, and I am having a hard time breathing. If I can wade through this later tonight, I'm going to award p-ness to everyone for the goddamnedst exemplary snark and Palin-pecking I have seen to date. I am weeping in joy so much right now, that I cannot do it.

freakishlywrong June 3, 2011 at 2:27 pm

Call 411!

[redacted]hse June 3, 2011 at 7:35 pm

Take an aspirin and a nitro if you have any.

trampndirtdown June 3, 2011 at 11:17 pm

Apply alcohol liberally.

OneYieldRegular June 3, 2011 at 2:21 pm

Sweet lord. If only Paul Revere would ride his horse out of the grave to give Ms. Palin a moment like this one:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bBtXfBdEXEs

PsycWench June 3, 2011 at 5:55 pm
El Pinche June 3, 2011 at 2:23 pm

Bless you KFTC

neiltheblaze June 3, 2011 at 2:23 pm

What do you mean "will be"?

genxr June 3, 2011 at 2:23 pm

That's why Tina Fey makes the big bucks.

SilverTsunami June 3, 2011 at 2:25 pm

"Could Sarah Palin be stupider?"

Oh, great. Now you went and asked!

kissawookiee June 3, 2011 at 4:23 pm

Did we learn nothing from the Deciderer and "bring it on?"

weejee June 3, 2011 at 2:26 pm

We could hope she has staked-out a cooking class at Jeanne D'Arc School in Lowell. Could be a torch song for the perpetual victim.

DerrickWildcat June 3, 2011 at 2:26 pm

Paul Revere protected the Indians!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQ6RjP7MlXk&fe

SilverTsunami June 3, 2011 at 2:27 pm

Yes, but did she make nice collectible creamers and teapots? I think NOT.

fuflans June 3, 2011 at 2:31 pm

the squirmishes of lexington and concord…

Gold_ManSacks June 3, 2011 at 2:31 pm

I hate her so much. The fact that there are millions of people who somehow can't see through her self-promoting lies and unfathomable stupidity makes me sad. Angry too but mostly sad.

[redacted]hse June 3, 2011 at 7:36 pm

Prozac.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 3:27 pm

Tanqueray.

fuflans June 3, 2011 at 2:35 pm

and vanity. never forget vanity.

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 2:40 pm

I don't know, peak, heights, pinnacle, etc., usually implies a positive thing. We are looking for depths, I think.

Sadly, I think the bottom of the Marianas Trench has competition when it comes to wondering what depths of stupidity, vapidity, avarice, and general assholery that silly cunt can reach.

franco_pinyon June 3, 2011 at 2:41 pm

Just the other day, I was telling someone that there could not be a politician in America who was dumber than Michele Bachmann when it comes to American History.

Boy, was I wrong!

Is it something in the dark hair dye?

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 3:30 pm

And somewhere, ol' Crazy Eyes smirks.

GOPCrusher June 3, 2011 at 3:33 pm

And it still Friday afternoon, which means there is still time for someone to raise the bar even higher.

franco_pinyon June 3, 2011 at 2:43 pm

This could be one of Jay Leno's "On the Street" interviews. One of the WORST!

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 3:31 pm

Talk about redemption for every drunkass/stoned college stoont that ever flubbed up on tape for those interviews.

smitallica June 3, 2011 at 2:44 pm

Sarah Palin has no idea who ____________ was, or what he did.

Insert any person from history, ever, except maybe Jesus and/or Ronald Reagan (same thing).

Dr_Zoidberg June 3, 2011 at 3:33 pm

Please. She couldn't get it right about those two, either.

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 3:34 pm

Based on her speeches, policies, actions, and frequent violations of most of Jesus' commands (love one another, render unto Caesar, etc. etc.), I think it's safe to say that she doesn't know who Jesus was, or what he did.

carolinaswamp June 3, 2011 at 8:20 pm

She definitely doesn't know what J.C. had to say.

KeepFnThatChicken June 3, 2011 at 2:44 pm

Someone here, many moons ago, posted about the Dunning-Krueger Effect. In fact, I'm fairly certain the original poster noted in a thread about Sarah Palin, but I digress.

These are the kinds of things that can't be reported on, until she deems herself suitable for an evaluation. Fine, I can live with that. But just remember that the electorate will only pull against her, until they have no choice. Then snaps back the elastic band of "party unity."

And we'll still never get that question answered, of whether she's mentally suitable for this much attention the job. I mean, we know the answer. But apparently her shit does not stink.

Steverino247 June 3, 2011 at 3:49 pm

That was PsycWench, I believe.

[redacted]hse June 3, 2011 at 7:38 pm

If YOU pooped ice-cream you'd understand. It's a little like the Mensa group in a way.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 3:31 pm

"And we'll still never get that question answered, of whether she's mentally suitable for the job. I mean, we know the answer. But apparently her shit does not stink."

She doesn't answer that question because she doesn't understand why she keeps getting asked that question.

And she doesn't understand why she keeps getting asked that question, not only because she's pigfucking stupid, but also because, insofar as she can "think", she considers qualifications irrelevant. Like her predecessor, W, she's spent her entire life having everything handed to her just because she wanted it, and now feels that she's entitled to have the Presidency effortlessly handed to her, just because she wants it.

donner_froh June 3, 2011 at 2:45 pm

And then Sarah Palin’s stupidity and vapidity reached the known threshold and she vanished into space-time. Not really. Not ever.

Wonkette, Jr. you are such a tease.

Pres[EXTERMINATE!!] June 3, 2011 at 2:48 pm

Waiting for Piper to cold-cock another reporter for asking Mama Grizzly gotcha questions on their private family vacation…

AJWjr. June 4, 2011 at 9:52 am

You know, I had a pretty fucked up childhood, too. I mean we never strapped Seamus the Dog to the roof of the Family Truckster or hired a tour bus and entourage to tool around Colonial USAmerica, but it was pretty fucked up. What I'm getting at, is that this has been poor little Wiper's entire life, so to her it's normal. It's gonna be a pretty spectacular unraveling, and we get to watch.

jackypants June 3, 2011 at 2:50 pm

To be fair – the British regulars were marching to Concord to destroy a reported cache of milita supplies. So, in a very limited manner, it was kinda about the British takin' away our arms.

It's not that she's 100% incorrect about American history, she just has a 2nd-graders' understanding of it.

Sheesko June 3, 2011 at 5:48 pm

The lesson we take from this event is that Palin's cognitive skills are nil. She's known for her "word salad" conversational style. It appears she hears that way, too. She may actually have serious learning disabilities, no shit. The Dunning-Kreuger effect would explain why she doesn't appear at all interested in working on it.

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 6:44 pm

Underneath learning disabilities may be a very intelligent but frustrated person. Underneath Sarah's learning disabilities, if she has any, is a just plain stupid, lazy person.

Redhead June 3, 2011 at 2:52 pm

Of course. It's the teatard way. Revise history until it fits your needs. Just like George Washington and the rest of the founding fathers that didn't rest until they had abolished slavery, even though it took them 100 years of banging their slaves to get there.

Pres[EXTERMINATE!!] June 3, 2011 at 3:04 pm

This isn't even revisionist history – it's alternate history, like General Lee's orders not being lost before the Battle of Antietam, leading to a Southern victory and ultimately an armistice. Or an obviously mentally challenged person being nominated for Vice President of the United States and later being taken seriously as a Presidential candidate. Same country, different universe. Oh, WAIT a second….

mrblifil June 3, 2011 at 2:53 pm

The Tea Party is coming, The Tea Party is coming…ALL OVER HER OILY TAITZ!!1!

mog253 June 3, 2011 at 2:56 pm

Well, we could use an exorcist just about now.

petehammer June 3, 2011 at 3:47 pm

"The power of Christ compels you… to shut the hell up!"

Soylent Green June 3, 2011 at 2:57 pm

i'm reminded of Miss Teen Ditz America 2008, when she blathered something about 'Da Africa'.

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 3:36 pm

Sounds like Madeline Albright in retrospect, doesn't she?

sportshort June 3, 2011 at 2:59 pm

Paul Revere met up with Obi Wan Kenobi and said, "The emperor is coming, the emperor is coming!"

Obi said, "No."
Paul said "What?"
Obi said, "You can do what you want Paul, but
the next time you see me coming, you better run…"
Paul just pointed with his gun and said,
"I'll be in Sarah the idiot's bus on Highway 61."

That's the way I heard it.

trampndirtdown June 3, 2011 at 11:24 pm

I can't believe he's fucking 70 years old.

Veritas78 June 3, 2011 at 3:00 pm

Does the downfister know of Ken's new policy to give each negative pee-point 50¢ but each positive just 25¢? This dumbass troll is gonna make some of us rich. (Shhh…)

PalinPussyPower June 5, 2011 at 12:51 pm

Don't speak about the Soros Bonus publicly, please.

anniegetyerfun June 3, 2011 at 3:03 pm

Goodness knows that the Founding Fathers wanted nothing more than a heavily armed populace! How else were they supposed to shoot wolves from helly kopters?

DustBowlBlues June 3, 2011 at 3:05 pm

So, if I have Sarah's idea of Paul Revere correct, he was warning the British that they weren't going to take away our precious Second Amendment rights.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 3:39 pm

He was warning us Amurrkins that the British were coming over to try and force us to have soshulizm health care like they have over there.

poorgradstudent June 3, 2011 at 3:06 pm

Now this might be a reality TV show I'd actually want to watch, "Ask Sarah Palin Questions About History."

"Sarah, what do you think of the significance of the Magna Carta?"
"Um I think it set a pretty big precedent for the Founding Fathers since it let the British declare independence from the English and all."

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 3:40 pm

The Cart being in front of the Magma such as, shows God in his wisdom as to the protection also too of personal property and thus as to the lack of not being needed for volcano protection and whatnot as our freedoms then stongly maintain through not raising taxes for volcano monitoring. The Cart is safe. And then um, yeah.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 3:40 pm

"Like that movie where Mel Gibson saved the British from the British".

jus_wonderin June 3, 2011 at 3:12 pm

Words fail me. No, acshoeally…wrosd haf bigun 2 fayle mi.

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 6:46 pm

Theoretically, Sarah should understand where you're coming from.

gurukalehuru June 3, 2011 at 3:12 pm

Well, if the runnin' for president thingie doesn't work out for her, she could always run for Miss Teen South Carolina. Of course, she's not a teen, she's not from South Carolina, but she's certainly stupid enough.

UW8316154 June 5, 2011 at 11:10 pm

And still she wouldn't do better than third place.

DaSandman June 3, 2011 at 3:13 pm

Goddam, who in their right mind could think this commuity college mattress back deserves to be president?

This country is being overrun by the geneticly disadvandaged (ie Teabags) and the just plain aggressively stupid. (ie well…pick one you like there are so many)

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 3:13 pm

"…British march out. No one can explain it. "

They were escaping Palin?
(So the chronology is off. Ask Ms. 2nd-Amendment-to-a-not-yet-in-existence-Constitution Palin about that.)

Pragmatist2 June 3, 2011 at 3:14 pm

The Clampetts would be an upgrade for the Palins.

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 6:49 pm

One hell of an upgrade. The unflinching honesty, compassion, and integrity of Jed and Granny. Ellie Mae and her love for "critters." Jethro actually was none too bright and kind of a schemer, but he had a good heart and was capable of learning.

sportshort June 3, 2011 at 3:20 pm

Also, Paul Revere bleached his anus so that we could have free beaches.

Betcha didn't know that, huh? I read it on Tea-pedia. That's where the fax are.

Sheesko June 3, 2011 at 3:27 pm

Mark Twain.

trampndirtdown June 3, 2011 at 10:16 pm

And/or Samuel Clemens

HistoriCat June 3, 2011 at 3:34 pm

"Just the tip!"

Gleem_McShineys June 3, 2011 at 3:35 pm

He who warned uh, the British that they weren’t gonna be takin’ away our cakes we like, uh by ringing those a peace cigs, and um, makin’ sure as he’s riding his cedar cheese through town to send those warning musturds and speggti that we were going to be sure and we were going to be white kasuls, and we were going to be hamberger meat.

Why the fuck not.

ChessieNefercat June 4, 2011 at 12:19 pm

"riding his cedar cheese through town"

(Wiping monitor…)
Betcha those six common English words have never been strung together in that order in the whole, entire history of the English language!

Soylent Green June 3, 2011 at 3:44 pm

can you guys please repost that slackjaw with the american flag, tearing up the backyard in a Quad when Bin Laden got killed? That is so Palin's idea of Paul Revere.

petehammer June 3, 2011 at 3:48 pm

A stupid/brilliant line from that song:

"Don't you see no matter what you do
You'll never run away from you"

Chet Kincaid June 3, 2011 at 3:51 pm

Oh. My. God.

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 6:50 pm

You said it all.

trampndirtdown June 3, 2011 at 11:28 pm

Joe.My.God.

problemwithcaring June 3, 2011 at 3:51 pm

Omfg. Through this comment, and of course in a totally indirect way, Palin's ShitTour actually managed to learn me something.

She is failing upward, like the wingnuts say!

HarryButtle June 4, 2011 at 4:30 pm

I had the same epiphany…Sarah's stupid is educational!

Steverino247 June 3, 2011 at 3:58 pm

And then Paul Reverse (sic) went through Concord and Lexington, a ridin' and a whoopin', beating everything that moved within an inch of their lives, except the women folks, of course. The British took away their Second Amendment rights later on at the George the Sixth Dance!

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 3:43 pm

Wait, George the *sixth*?
Wasn't that…
Oh, right. I see what you did there.

Cat_Damon June 3, 2011 at 4:02 pm

I've always admired Paul Revere for sticking with the Boston Celtics even when times got tough in the mid-2000s.

mourningnmerica June 3, 2011 at 4:09 pm

There has been some speculation that Trig is not her child. Trust me, Trig IS her child.

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 6:51 pm

Well, geez, way to dash the little guy's hopes.

[redacted]hse June 3, 2011 at 7:48 pm

He certainly has his mother's mental acuity, so there's that.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 3:44 pm

Even Trig has better sense than to pick her for a mother.

mourningnmerica June 3, 2011 at 4:14 pm

And if you are just now arriving, I would like take this opportunity to welcome you all to Retard Nation. It's a wonderful place where you can aspire to become leader of the entire country, even if you are a stone cold fucking imbecile.

[redacted]hse June 3, 2011 at 7:51 pm

Trig / 2062

axmxz June 3, 2011 at 4:34 pm

She's just trying to repeat what the voices in her head are telling her. It's not working very well, because there are too many.

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 6:52 pm

And apparently they are all, without exception, as dumb as she is.

[redacted]hse June 3, 2011 at 7:54 pm

Plus it's an echo-chamber.
The reverb in there would drive a sane person to distraction, but we needn't worry about Sarah.

politics_nerd June 3, 2011 at 4:46 pm

This is wonkbot stupid-alert territory, if I've ever seen it.

smokefilledroommate June 3, 2011 at 5:10 pm

She should have never ventured into Boston intellectually unarmed.

[redacted]hse June 3, 2011 at 7:57 pm

I noticed she didn't go to Cambridge, where they would chew her up and spit her out.

Negropolis June 4, 2011 at 2:24 am

Zing.

MarionNYNY June 3, 2011 at 5:12 pm

But she really looked like she was just making it up for the lulz. She's way to into the joke at this point. It's like Cindy Sherman running for President or something. It was so much funnier before it became intentional. Sarah has jumped the shark.

lochnessmonster June 3, 2011 at 5:19 pm

What the hell was she on? She definitely appeared to be drunk or on drugs or something. Slurred speech, unstable walking…or is just me?

ChessieNefercat June 4, 2011 at 12:22 pm

I went back and watched it without the sound (makes my dog cringe and piddle), and I think you're right. I'm no expert, but yeah her eyes, and walk.

I suppose if I were trapped in her skull with her, I would do drugs also.

lochnessmonster June 4, 2011 at 4:03 pm

I thought that right off the bat…Loaded.JanWhat other people think of youIs none of your business.

Rotundo_ June 5, 2011 at 4:24 pm

Something tells me that when she is at 14:59:99 she will wind up at Betty Ford sharing a room with Lohan. I just can't imagine that shit coming out of someone who is not out of their skull on medication or improvised recreational pharmaceuticals. Then she can go on the grifting for Juh-HEEEEEEEEEEEEE-Zus circuit down south and load up on cash and the medication/recreational pharmaceuticals of her choice. Rinse, Lather, Repeat.

JackObin June 3, 2011 at 5:22 pm

"Paul Revere" is Palin family code for anal sex.

[redacted]hse June 3, 2011 at 8:02 pm

Family anal sex?
Sled dogs, too, right?

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 9:06 pm

""Paul Revere" is Palin family code for anal sex. "

Pronounced "pole the rear".

Gleem_McShineys June 6, 2011 at 3:09 pm

I did it like this, I did it like that.
I did it with the whiffle ball bat.

Sheesko June 3, 2011 at 5:49 pm

Oh, but they're Socialists. And also gay, too.

BZ1 June 3, 2011 at 6:01 pm

didn't someone say in the McCain camp, that she doesn't know anything… nothing's changed…

rocktonsam June 3, 2011 at 6:29 pm

TODD PALIN SHOULD BE ARRESTED FOR FUCKING A RETARD, FUCKING RETARD

[redacted]hse June 3, 2011 at 8:04 pm

Christ, he's molesting Trig?
Shameless.

AJWjr. June 3, 2011 at 6:38 pm
Warpde June 3, 2011 at 6:39 pm

Said it before and will say it again.
Fucking stupid woman.
The type of girl we use to stand on the corner and throw rocks at.

[redacted]hse June 3, 2011 at 8:05 pm

Set her on fire and put it out with pitchforks.

tessiee June 3, 2011 at 6:48 pm

I thought we would never get rid of Mann Coulter, either, but I think we don't have to acknowledge his/her existence any more.

ChessieNefercat June 4, 2011 at 11:36 am

"I thought we would never get rid of Mann Coulter, either, but I think we don't have to acknowledge his/her existence any more. "

Grabs gratefully at the life preserver…

LibrulEleet June 3, 2011 at 7:06 pm

One if by land, two if by sea, three if by air.

AJWjr. June 3, 2011 at 7:44 pm
sportshort June 3, 2011 at 7:19 pm

She was edumacated by teechurs who knew she wood be running for Prezmadent 1 day and they were libural and jealous of her enormous body of thoughts and said we will teech her wrongly and she will be to be laughed at by us on that day and we will laugh as well for we are libural. Ha.

Walkinwiddaking June 3, 2011 at 7:22 pm

You gotta be shitting me. This is the kind of crap that ejaculates out of her, what passes for a brain, and she still has a following? Damn, America really does have an educational crisis, even on the elementary level. Goodbye America, nice knowin' ya.

jqpublick June 4, 2011 at 11:48 pm

Do YOU kiss your kids with that filthy mouth?

Jerri June 3, 2011 at 7:26 pm

What we need is a whole nation of Sarah Palins home schoolin their kids. For Jesus!

Dude, they are waaaaay ahead of you there.

[redacted]hse June 3, 2011 at 7:32 pm

Just shoot the bitch and put us out of our misery.

Fox n Fiends June 3, 2011 at 7:45 pm

Just listen to how she says "his horse through town".

100% guaranteed she has Aspergers.

[redacted]hse June 3, 2011 at 8:07 pm

She has Aspergers for BREAKFAST.

Negropolis June 4, 2011 at 2:26 am

ROTFLMAO!

Are you implying that she ownz/pwnz the entire autism spectrum?

UpFistTroll June 3, 2011 at 10:16 pm

I figured that, by now, we wouldn't be allowed to use such a sensitive word as "Aspergers," but you went and pulled the trigger anyway.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 9:09 pm

"100% guaranteed she has Aspergers"

??
I thought people with Asperger's were supposed to be smart, but socially maladjusted (I don't mean that unkindly).
I don't think it counts if you're only the latter.

Rotundo_ June 5, 2011 at 4:35 pm

I don't think so. An Aspie would never have screwed up a historical fact that basic. $arah is just an uneducated, ignorant, opportunistic ass with what I suspect was a major dose of recreational pharmaceuticals or prescription pharmaceuticals clouding up an already painfully dim intellect.

[redacted]hse June 3, 2011 at 7:55 pm

She may think the name is Rand Paul Revere.

Eve8Apples June 3, 2011 at 9:06 pm

"he was banging on bells and firing shots into the sky like some common Wasilla meth freak with a semi-automatic"

Actually, that exact image appears on the Alaska state seal.

Eve8Apples June 3, 2011 at 9:16 pm

I can't wait 'til the crazy bus reaches the northern Great Plains. The Sioux will scalp the bitch when she gives her take on the Battle of the Little Bighorn.

Captain_Klutz June 3, 2011 at 9:27 pm

Oh lord, what a dimwit. Ms Sarah cannot seem to be to put a complete thought together that hasn't been scripted & rehearsed. Don't go away mad little lady–just go away.

SonofSpermcube June 3, 2011 at 9:45 pm

Sarah Palin is not vapid. She is not boring. Vacuous, definitely, but not vapid.

ChessieNefercat June 4, 2011 at 12:28 pm

Thank you! I see I have been using these as if they were interchangeable and they are in fact different.

Whereas Pawlenty is both vapid and vacuous, right?

ttommyunger June 3, 2011 at 9:56 pm

513 Fucking posts, and counting, for this vapid twat who we already knew was a moron? Jesus, this woman is probably the most polarizing figure in America. Fucking crazy!

GeneralLerong June 3, 2011 at 10:02 pm

Well, when you encounter a fool hen, it's hard to resist bonking it with a rock and eating it for dinner. [quaint alaskan spruce grouse lore]

ttommyunger June 3, 2011 at 10:09 pm

She is just five years away from being Victoria Jackson, I promise you.

ChessieNefercat June 4, 2011 at 12:31 pm

Let's make it (counts on fingers to January 20, 2013) 19 months, and you're right.

ttommyunger June 4, 2011 at 3:04 pm

The sooner the better!

UpFistTroll June 3, 2011 at 10:13 pm

Here's a distraction for you, then: I just saw a friend of a friend comment (on Facebook) that Obama is trying to get us to default on our debts in order to destroy the dollar and turn us all socialist and working for the government. I had no idea that it was Obama, and not a bunch of dipshit teatards and Republicunts, who were threatening not to raise the debt ceiling. Thank goodness that vapid fucking idiot set me straight.

ttommyunger June 3, 2011 at 10:27 pm

Flip Wilson's dictum: “A lie is just as good as the truth, if you can get somebody to believe it.”

horsedreamer_1 June 4, 2011 at 12:00 pm

A lie
The truth
Which one should I use?
If the lie
succeeds
Then you'll know what I mean
When I tell you, 'I have secrets to attend'

(Way back in '96 — so even before Piper was born, let alone her little "brother" — Greg Dulli knew the truth of Lou & Todd's parental deceits.)

(Also: "Honky's Ladder" would make a great slogan for Palin 2012.)

ttommyunger June 4, 2011 at 3:02 pm

I don't care who da Baby Momma Be, I just want them to stop breeding.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 9:19 pm

"Obama is trying to get us to default on our debts in order to destroy the dollar and turn us all socialist and working for the government"

This week, I started a new temp assignment in a government office, making the same hourly wage I was making at my permanent government job in 1987. For the last three years, I've been trying to get hired on to a nice, safe, cushy permanent government job with a nice, steady paycheck and perhaps even some actual health benefits. Does this mean I'm a socialist?

PuckStopsHere June 4, 2011 at 10:57 pm

I don't have friends like that. I dump their silly asses.

AJWjr. June 5, 2011 at 9:31 pm

She's been quite helpful for that. Any "friend" who forwarded me something uplifting about her, I relegated to the spam folder. Anyone local that had a McCain/palin yard sign, window poster or bumper sticker, I deleted their phone# from my list. This is why I'm always on wonkette, all my real friends are dead to me.

Eve8Apples June 3, 2011 at 10:24 pm

What irritates the hell out of me is not her stupidity. It's the fact that people in this country consider her a serious contender for the most powerful position in the fuckin' world.

ttommyunger June 3, 2011 at 10:30 pm

I haz sadz over this, too.

ChessieNefercat June 4, 2011 at 12:32 pm

I will join your sadz group over this.

ttommyunger June 4, 2011 at 3:05 pm

Sigh!

trampndirtdown June 3, 2011 at 11:41 pm

Jaysus Tommy +500 and no 100 comment long trollthreads!

ttommyunger June 4, 2011 at 12:20 am

Speechless, I am.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 9:21 pm

Her particular combination of stupidity, arrogance, and hunger for incessant attention make her such a perfect target for ridicule that it's difficult to stop. It's like watching a train wreck in slow motion.

ttommyunger June 4, 2011 at 9:44 pm

But others are absolutely atingle at the sight of her. Ugh!

SpurningBeer June 3, 2011 at 10:28 pm

My uncle Billy!!

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 12:59 pm

No, your Uncle Billy isn't William Shake Spear, he's William Shakes BEER, which is why you guys have the same last name.

UW8316154 June 4, 2011 at 3:41 pm

Uncle Billy was a brewer, and his brew was Billy Beer.

SpurningBeer June 4, 2011 at 3:44 pm

As my niece Britney says, "Oops,I did it again!!"

trampndirtdown June 3, 2011 at 10:36 pm

OT Leno's great writing team ( they keep him on the air don't they) came up with Romney/Palin 2012 Sarah can't answer questions and Mitt has two answers for each.

owhatever June 3, 2011 at 10:39 pm

Listen to what she meant, not what she said. No, wait. That doesn't work either.

donner_froh June 3, 2011 at 11:01 pm

I really am unable to listen to that idiot–her nasal, buzzsaw-hitting-a-knot whine could curdle milk. If she was making a speech accepting all the Nobel Prizes given for a year she would still sound profoundly stupid.

That what she actually says is sub-normal blabbering is expected–Palin is one of the most incurious people I have ever encountered–but having to listen to her speak words is a crime against humanity.

Negropolis June 3, 2011 at 11:45 pm

“He who warned uh,

I stopped reading the word salad right there. She's like a busted-ass computer spellchecker.

I honestly don't get what goes on in her mind when trying to compose a sentence. It seems like she wants to sound intellectual, but she has got to realize that simply changing word order doesn't do that. She sounds like a cracked/methed-out Yoda.

Then you have the whole factually incorrect thing working against her, too. Not only is the sentence all jumbled, but when unjumbled — when you even can – she's just spouting bullshit lies and errors. Bitch is an utter moving violation.

Negropolis June 4, 2011 at 1:07 am

I'm sensing a new meme coming on….

"Sarah Palin Has No Idea Who/What _________________"

I hope we never forget that this was supposed to be the answer to Hillary Clinton, just like Michael Steele was supposed to be the answer to the president. It's like the GOP tried to clone their respective DNA, and botched the fuck out of it, and they came out all deformed on the other end.

horsedreamer_1 June 4, 2011 at 12:02 pm

All blacks & all women look alike to them, i.e. subhuman, & therefore unworthy of distinct treatment.

yyyaz June 4, 2011 at 6:12 pm

I'm going to go with "Sarah Palin Has No Idea Who/What/When/Where/or Why" for $500, Alex.

Negropolis June 6, 2011 at 12:05 am

Surely, that's only a $200 clue.

Negropolis June 4, 2011 at 2:23 am

You just won all of the internet-marbles.

Negropolis June 4, 2011 at 2:30 am

This isn't a bit deal, guys. She obviously got Paul Revere mixed up with Ron Paul Revered.

You guys ain't seen nothin' yet. Wait until she becomes self-aware, then shit'll get real!

freddymcmurray June 4, 2011 at 2:57 am

Thomas Pa(l)in(e): No Common Sense.

horsedreamer_1 June 4, 2011 at 12:03 pm

Lou Sarah: Nuisance.

102415 June 4, 2011 at 3:13 am

I heard it's over and she and the kid fly back to Alaska tomorrow. I hope she didn't promise little Twig that they were going to Disney World on that bus.

smokefilledroommate June 4, 2011 at 5:33 am

"I may be broke but I'm not flat busted" = 80's understanding of Paul Revere.

horsedreamer_1 June 4, 2011 at 12:06 pm

The most disappointing aspect of this video is the anchor not having a Boston accent. (I know, I know — it's common for all affiliates to hire staff possessing, or training new hires to speak with, a Generalized Plains Affect (I knew a South Dakotan at university who was rather proud of her state's contribution to the newsmedia, in this regard), but, come on — OWAH ACZENT IS BETTAH'N YORN ACZENT.)

& no, I wasn't disappointed by Lou Sarah, at all. I expected as much from her answer.

UW8316154 June 4, 2011 at 12:12 pm

Aha! Here is it…Sarah Palin's Convocation at the College of the Ozarks… Good times, good times.
http://wonkette.com/411714/sarah-palin-convocatio

October 20th, 2009 – has it really been that long? We've been making fun of her for YEARS and she hasn't gone away yet??

ChessieNefercat June 4, 2011 at 12:37 pm

She's like the Energizer Bunny™ of mean and stupid.

ganmerlad June 4, 2011 at 12:25 pm

As the older wonkers know, Paul Revere used to make pots and pans which he called "Revereware". Some say the pot-ware was made out of old bullets, but the way Sarah tells it, more likely the British took over the factory and used his pot metal to make new bullets. Between pot bullets and Revere yelling to the British that they couldn't take our guns, they won the war and that is why America is still an English colony.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 12:46 pm

Technically, she's molesting both American history AND the English language.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 12:48 pm

"What's a battle?"

Neoyorquino June 4, 2011 at 1:24 pm

Y'all just jealous. Sarah attended five different colleges, so that clearly makes her five times smarter than everyone else.

lulzmonger June 4, 2011 at 1:26 pm

"The Palin Serial Aneurysm Theorem" is also looking pretty good right now.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 1:27 pm

"This gentleman is more endow'd by the Creator in his privy parts."

Chet Kincaid June 4, 2011 at 2:49 pm

"Pray beg your pardon for errors of the quill in my previous miffive. I meant to set down 'croff-hatching.'"

lulzmonger June 4, 2011 at 1:29 pm

One if by popular vote, two if by Supreme Court fiat!

rocktonsam June 4, 2011 at 3:03 pm

betcha her favorite patriot is Tom Brady.
no really..

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 3:41 pm

I support community colleges AND being a slutbunny.

The fact that the convergence of same in Lou Sarah hasn't saved her from being thoroughly unacceptable is her fault and hers alone.

UW8316154 June 4, 2011 at 5:10 pm

645 comments and 40,429 views. Ken, is this some sort of record?

comrad_darkness June 4, 2011 at 5:29 pm

WSF – Word Salad Fail.

OKthennext June 4, 2011 at 9:18 pm

"One if by land, two if by seamonkey"

jqpublick June 4, 2011 at 11:23 pm

Regardless, of what school of cosmotology she attended I would bet that she's better looking than the women in your life.

Jerry_Barry June 5, 2011 at 1:03 am

I hope Palin and Bachmann both run for President. Not that I want them to win which will never happen, but the comedy from the debates would be Priceless! LOL.

It would be the best comedy ever! So God, if you are listen, let Palin and Bachmann run and be in debates with others! LOL.

I don't know if I could watch these two dunces because I'd being laughing so hard, my stomach would hurt!

Clungeflaps June 5, 2011 at 1:38 am

I love palin, I don't see why people get so wound up by her. She's possibly the campest woman in existence.

I used to love old john waters movies but now I find them terribly droll since the rise of palin and her gravy-gutted minions.

SaintRond June 5, 2011 at 3:02 pm

Palin as gay icon. That'd fix her.

Negropolis June 6, 2011 at 12:32 am

Why couldn't she have been content with simply being a talk show queen? The problem is that she's promoting herself as a serious politician and people are falling for the shit.

tessiee June 6, 2011 at 1:02 am

"I used to love old john waters movies"

"I've been ironing for two hours now, AND MY DIET PILL IS WEARING OFF."

Sassomatic June 5, 2011 at 3:37 am

Hey has she twatted her response yet. I know I'm just feeding the beast but I'm kind of looking forward to that.

Sassomatic June 5, 2011 at 3:39 am

Also, I hope John McCain is proud of himself for unleashing this plague upon the land.

Patinny June 5, 2011 at 10:09 am

Oh, I hope this bus ride thing is all just a publicity stunt for her. Leaders of other countries think she's cute but that's where their admiration stops. Who will be her choice of VP, Paris Hilton or Kim Kardashian?

hmi June 5, 2011 at 10:40 am

So much smugness in such little space:
"This account in "Paul Revere's Ride" by David Hackett Fischer (Oxford University Press 1994), may be of interest to Think Progress and all the others laughing because they purport to be so much better informed than Palin:
"A townsman remembered that 'repeated gunshots, the beating of drums and the ringing of bells filled the air.'…. Along the North Shore of Massachusetts, church bells began to toll and the heavy beat of drums could be heard for many miles in the night air."
It's available on Google Books." http://legalinsurrection.blogspot.com/2011/06/so-

AJWjr. June 5, 2011 at 11:21 am
Sassomatic June 5, 2011 at 1:50 pm

All this woman knows about American History she got off a placemat at Shoney's.

DocKimble June 5, 2011 at 12:11 pm

I'm lovin' Gov Palin's "Reverse Potemkin Tour".
Didya get THAT historical reference?
Gov. Palin's MAKING history, the LSM media just doesn't know what's goin' on.

LET 'ER RIP, SARAH !!! TRIG PALIN for FIRST KID!!!

hmi June 5, 2011 at 12:27 pm

So much smugness in such little space: http://legalinsurrection.blogspot.com/2011/06/so-

kvona June 5, 2011 at 12:39 pm

As an Australian it is interesting to see so many people who I assume to be American attacking Palin for her lack of historical knowledge, whilst being so obviously ignorant themselves.
Here is the relevant passage from Revere's own memoir.

“I observed a Wood at a Small distance, & made for that. When I got there, out Started Six officers, on Horse back,and orderd me to dismount;-one of them, who appeared to have the command, examined me, where I came from,& what my Name Was? I told him. it was Revere, he asked if it was Paul? I told him yes He asked me if I was an express? I answered in the afirmative. He demanded what time I left Boston? I told him; and aded, that their troops had catched aground in passing the River, and that There would be five hundred Americans there in a short time, for I had alarmed the Country all the way up. He imediately rode towards those who stoppd us, when all five of them came down upon a full gallop; one of them, whom I afterwards found to be Major Mitchel, of the 5th Regiment, Clapped his pistol to my head, called me by name, & told me he was going to ask me some questions, & if I did not give him true answers, he would blow my brains out. He then asked me similar questions to those above. He then orderd me to mount my Horse, after searching me for arms. . .”
http://www.masshist.org/database/img-viewer.php?i

You do yourselves a disservice in reveling in someones supposed stupidity whist displaying it yourselves.

kvona June 5, 2011 at 12:49 pm

As an Australian it is interesting to see so many people who I assume to be American attacking Palin for her lack of historical knowledge, whilst being so obviously ignorant themselves.

Here is the relevant text from Revere's memoirs.

“I observed a Wood at a Small distance, & made for that. When I got there, out Started Six officers, on Horse back,and orderd me to dismount;-one of them, who appeared to have the command, examined me, where I came from,& what my Name Was? I told him. it was Revere, he asked if it was Paul? I told him yes He asked me if I was an express? I answered in the afirmative. He demanded what time I left Boston? I told him; and aded, that their troops had catched aground in passing the River, and that There would be five hundred Americans there in a short time, for I had alarmed the Country all the way up. He imediately rode towards those who stoppd us, when all five of them came down upon a full gallop; one of them, whom I afterwards found to be Major Mitchel, of the 5th Regiment, Clapped his pistol to my head, called me by name, & told me he was going to ask me some questions, & if I did not give him true answers, he would blow my brains out. He then asked me similar questions to those above. He then orderd me to mount my Horse, after searching me for arms. . .”
http://www.masshist.org/database/img-viewer.php?i

You do yourselves a disservice in mocking Palin for her supposed ignorance of American history, whilst displaying your own.

SaintRond June 5, 2011 at 1:27 pm

That cunt.

AJWjr. June 5, 2011 at 2:57 pm

Succinct.

SaintRond June 5, 2011 at 3:01 pm

I learned to appreciate brevity from Hemingway. That's why I write the same two words every time I see her name.

donner_froh June 5, 2011 at 4:38 pm

Another gotcha question:

What is the difference between a "Christian nation" and the imposition of Sharia law?

tessiee June 6, 2011 at 1:04 am

The former is freedom of religion and the latter is heathens forcing their beliefs down our throats.

donner_froh June 5, 2011 at 4:48 pm

This may have been posted but for those who haven't seen it–

Palin fans try to Wikipedia to reflect her idiotic mumbling.

AJWjr. June 5, 2011 at 9:37 pm
mosjef June 5, 2011 at 9:39 pm

Later that fateful night, Paul Revere and the Raiders appeared on the Ed Sullivan Show singing "Bits and Pieces".

Doktor Zoom June 5, 2011 at 10:01 pm

Sarah Palin always makes me think of the Echo Sonata for Two Unfriendly Groups of Instruments

AJWjr. June 5, 2011 at 10:16 pm

If you remember that from the olden times, then hail to thee, fellow olde.

tessiee June 6, 2011 at 12:11 am

Soon it will be made into a movie starring Matt Damon.

AFKensington June 6, 2011 at 1:24 am

No one remembers the Paul Revere that had a vagina. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sybil_Ludington

13Igor June 6, 2011 at 7:11 am

If only stupidity was painful.
She'd be calling Rush looking for a good (wink, wink) 24 hour pharmacy.

klem53 June 6, 2011 at 3:30 pm

The facts are you lefties are the one that need to go back to school. You guys aren't up on the latest deveopment because your leftest media doesn't want to address the issues that they are then ones that are historically incorrect and do not know the factual story of Paul Revere's ride.

From the Boston Herold. Sarah Palin yesterday insisted her claim at the Old North Church last week that Paul Revere “warned the British” during his famed 1775 ride — remarks that Democrats and the media roundly ridiculed — is actually historically accurate. And local historians are backing her up.

I love reading these lefy comments. You make me proud to be a conservative. You only repeat what you hear and you don't know what you are talking or commenting about. You either don't care or are too lazy to research the facts before you make your idiotic statements. You never make substantial comments, probably because you are incapable of an original thought of your own and are to lazy to find out the facts. You guys are too funny. Keep up your good work. I love you for it. lololololo

Penfieldsleuth June 6, 2011 at 11:36 pm

OK Kiddies, Take a deep breath, relax and then go look up Paul Revere's own report of his adventure that night. Revere himself states that when he was detained by British soldiers that he advised them he had been warning the local towns and that they were going to face a large force of colonists. He knew that they would not be able to get the weapons in Concord because they had been moved a few days before after one of his previous rides. to alert the countryside.
When Longfellow wrote the poem he changes the details to fit his poetic aims and these distortions, although exciting, do not match the "facts"

classicfilm June 7, 2011 at 11:13 am

Wonkette Jr, you're a hilarious, ignorant clown. Not only did Palin get all the points correct (as has been proven elsewhere, like DAYS ago, with historical links and everything, you silly fool), but you obviously haven't read a history book lately. Tsk, tsk – here's a towel to wipe the egg off your face.

HiredMind June 7, 2011 at 1:06 pm

Direct quote from Wikipedia: "On April 14, 1775, General Gage received instructions from Secretary of State William Legge, Earl of Dartmouth, to disarm the rebels, who were known to have hidden weapons in Concord,"

FlameCCT June 7, 2011 at 3:06 pm

Poor Wonkette and sycophants! Your reporting seems to be long on conjecture and short on facts.

First, Paul Revere did warn the British as documented in his own writings. Not to mention that almost all participants at the beginning of the Revolutionary War were all citizens of the British Empire.

Second, the lantern signal was given to Paul Revere to start his ride of warning. The towns used their church bells to gather and notify the people that the British soldiers were coming.

Finally, Palin accurately described the British intent to disarm the colonists and seize their stores of weapons. the supposed writer of this article then changes those comments into a straw man argument about the 2nd Amendment. The intent of the British government to remove their weapons at the start of the war was part of the motivation for including the 2nd amendment.

Perhaps y'all should read and learn about our American history instead of relying on progressive male bovine excrement.

FlameCCT June 7, 2011 at 3:11 pm

You really shouldn't talk about "Wonkette Jr's" lack of education about American history. Although maybe y'all prefer to be lemmings going over the cliff.

Palin accurately, although perhaps not elegantly, described the events of Paul Revere's "ride" including his warning to the British soldiers as written by Paul Revere himself.

philipjames June 7, 2011 at 3:40 pm

Yes, the Ku Klux Klan was established by the Democratic Party. Yes, the Ku Klux Klan murdered thousands of Republicans — African-American and white – in the years following the Civil War. Yes, the Republican Party and a Republican President, Ulysses Grant, destroyed the KKK with their Ku Klux Klan Act of 1871.

How did the Ku Klux Klan re-emerge in the 20th century? For that, the Democratic Party is to blame.

It was a racist Democrat President, Woodrow Wilson, who premiered Birth of a Nation in the White House. That racist movie was based on a racist book written by one of Wilson’s racist friends from college. In 1915, the movie spawned the modern-day Klan, with its burning crosses and white sheets.

Inspired by the movie, some Georgia Democrats revived the Klan. Soon, the Ku Klux Klan again became a powerful force within the Democratic Party. The KKK so dominated the 1924 Democratic Convention that Republicans, speaking truth to power, called it the Klanbake. In the 1930s, a Democrat President, Franklin Delano Roosevelt, appointed a Klansman, Senator Hugo Black (D-AL), to the U.S. Supreme Court. In the 1950s, the Klansmen against whom the civil rights movement struggled were Democrats. The notorious police commissioner Bull Connor, who attacked African-Americans with dogs and clubs and fire hoses, was both a Klansman and the Democratic Party’s National Committeeman for Alabama. Starting in the 1980s, the Democratic Party elevated a recruiter for the Ku Klux Klan, Senator Robert Byrd (D-WV), to third-in-line for the presidency.

Speaking more Truth to Power, the Republican Party has been a resolute enemy of the Ku Klux Klan, terrorist wing of the Democratic Party.

carlgt1 June 7, 2011 at 3:54 pm

err, how laughably silly and ahistoric in the Palin tradition. You totally ignore history since at least 1948 (the "Dixiecrat" shift to the Repugs), and the 60's & 70's southern strategy, not to mention the Klansmen David Duke as a Repub.

I would say, finally, that "we are all Paul Revere now" — because Palin & the RepugliKKKans are so out of teach with history & reality, and don't really care to know the truth about us (as people)….

jasmith4 June 8, 2011 at 9:03 am

Sex sells. Scary sells. Stupid sells. Sarcasm sells. And side-taking sells.. And Sarah Palin is all five!

By #5 I mean, if someone comes out against the statement that 2+2=4, the media will get a math teacher and the idiot and give them equal time in prime time — it sells!

DangerHelvetica June 9, 2011 at 3:18 pm

Man, if Paul Revere arrived as late as these conservative commenters, we'd all still be British citizens.

(My first go-to joke was to say we'd all be speaking English, but I get the sense that would drift lazily over the heads of some people.)

Selfish_T June 13, 2011 at 9:24 pm

If Bachmann were Prez, she would always "confer with the commanders in chief" on military decisions. I guess that means the other Bachmanns in her mind.

jaralad61 January 11, 2012 at 12:46 am

I have never been happier to read comments like the ones on this blog . and loads of laughs from the great comments made about this apology for intellect , if Palin's mother had known she was going to turn out as stupid as she has , she would have traded her in for a pet monkey . I go the U S A numerous times a yr . I am British and my very best friends are all American , fantastic people , and today i was on the phone to them and we giggled our asses off . Sarah here is your maths question for the day me little dodo brain.
If it take a man 2 weeks to walk 3 weeks then how many apples in a barrel of plums . humor is a wonderful thing , keep it up people .

nounverb911 June 3, 2011 at 1:08 pm

Nathan Hale? He sponsors the annual July 4th weiner eating contest on Coney island.

SexySmurf June 3, 2011 at 1:09 pm

I wonder who she thinks Nathan Hale is?

He played the Skipper on Gilligan's Island.

Captain_Quark June 3, 2011 at 1:12 pm

Room temperature measured in Celsius, to be precise.

riverside68 June 3, 2011 at 1:13 pm

The Revolutionary founder of Hale and Hearty Soups?

Sue4466 June 3, 2011 at 1:16 pm

Giving them too much credit. Room temps are in the 60s.

MinAgain June 3, 2011 at 1:52 pm

I wonder who she thinks Nathan Hale is?

Confederate war hero and founder of the Ku Klux Klan, no doubt. In which case, you might say that Palin can't see the Forrest for the trees.

Ba-dump-bump. I'll be here all week.

GOPCrusher June 3, 2011 at 2:28 pm

Does Bible Spice know that there is American History before Ronnie Raygun was made President?

kissawookiee June 3, 2011 at 4:04 pm

The guy in The Birdcage with the fabulous dinnerware?

tessiee June 3, 2011 at 6:31 pm

"I wonder who she thinks Nathan Hale is?"

That guy who was in that show on Broadway.

arihaya June 4, 2011 at 8:09 am

measure with Celcius temperature, that will be more accurate (i.e lower)

UW8316154 June 4, 2011 at 3:16 pm

You sillies! It the name of a high school in north Seattle. Duh.

Barb June 3, 2011 at 1:11 pm

And Bob Denver founded Colorado.

smokefilledroommate June 3, 2011 at 5:53 pm

Nah–he was in The Birdcage.

Sue4466 June 3, 2011 at 1:16 pm

Thought it was John? Rocky Mountain High!

user-of-owls June 3, 2011 at 1:17 pm

And Tina Louise founded Louisville.

thedeathofirony June 3, 2011 at 2:02 pm

And Tina Louise founded Louisville Farmville.

neiltheblaze June 3, 2011 at 2:05 pm

How's the veal?

MinAgain June 3, 2011 at 2:15 pm

You should try it. And remember to tip your waitress.

neiltheblaze June 3, 2011 at 2:34 pm

But won't she need help getting up?

Geminisunmars June 3, 2011 at 5:54 pm

Weren't that Joe Cocker?

ChessieNefercat June 3, 2011 at 6:04 pm

"Hold my beer, I'm gonna try something."

trampndirtdown June 3, 2011 at 9:41 pm

I really don't remember what happened when I said that, but I know it hurt bad the next day.

trampndirtdown June 3, 2011 at 11:15 pm

No, no , no Ray Kroc.

horsedreamer_1 June 4, 2011 at 11:55 am

You mean, the guy with a writing credit on Too Pack's "California Love"?

(This is true.)

Lascauxcaveman June 4, 2011 at 2:06 am

Oh, that Nathan Hale. The inventor of the tubesteak.

A great American, from Frankfurter, Germany.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 1:13 pm

Yeah, but that's a dollar extra, so you guys would have to have three dollars instead of two.

tessiee June 4, 2011 at 1:38 pm

I believe Kitty Kelley is alive and well.

NewtsChicknNeck June 4, 2011 at 3:05 pm

the one about the homozexckuals?? Sarah has never sat through such filth. It's all good clean family fun whale blubber, meth-makin', snow mobile racing, shooting things from helicopters. but two men settling down together? that shit is gross.
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-28710335

MaxUdargo June 4, 2011 at 3:14 pm

Thank you.

So… does this mean I can sit with you guys in the cafeteria, or is that pushing it? That's probably pushing it. I'll just sit over here next to the guy with the lightsaber holster.

UW8316154 June 4, 2011 at 3:19 pm

See, right there, downfist, upfist. The fist goes up and down, and back up again.

102415 June 4, 2011 at 3:24 pm

I don't know? I'm not allowed to eat in the cafeteria. If I didn't sneak out I'm probably handcuffed in the principal's office. You are welcome!

UW8316154 June 4, 2011 at 5:07 pm

Sigh.

ttommyunger June 4, 2011 at 6:41 pm

(Cups head in hands, silently weeps)

Comments on this entry are closed.

Previous post:

Next post: