Bribery at Tiffany’s: Newt’s Latest Wife Did Tiffany’s Bidding

  this explains the $500K 0% credit line

Is it okay if we just keep using 'Bribery at Tiffany's'?We thought Giant Whining Baby/Serial Divorcer Newt Gingrich had his half-million-dollar Tiffany’s credit line just because he always needs new engagement rings when he divorces his old, cancer-ridden wives for new, younger ladies he’s been schtupping for several years. But no, it’s actually sleazier than all that, because this is Newt Gingrich we’re talking about. Why did he get a very special $500,000 charge account from the jeweler with a truly spectacular 0% interest rate? Financial journalists are on the case, and they found out Newt’s current wife Callista used to be a “a high level staffer for the House Agriculture Committee, which oversees mining policy,” while a former Newt top staffer is now a top lobbyist for Tiffany’s. Because Tiffany’s mines silver on U.S. public lands, and Newt got Tiffany’s a very sweet deal to exploit America’s natural resources from America’s public lands, so that Tiffany executives and stockholders can make tens of millions of dollars every quarter by selling silver from public lands to rich douchesacks and ladder-climbing sociopaths.

Sexy business nerd Felix Salmon writes on his Reuters blog:

There’s enough confusion over the Tiffany’s deal that it certainly looks unusual — while Tiffany’s does extend interest-free loans of up to one year to top clients, Gingrich’s account was open for two consecutive years, despite the fact that Gingrich claimed to be paying no interest on it. And in any case it seems unwise, to say the least, to accept an interest-free loan of more than $250,000 from a company which is lobbying your committee — no matter how rare or common such loans might be.

There’s an irony here: we only know the loan was interest-free because Newt Gingrich went on TV to say so, in order to try to portray himself as fiscally prudent. But now we do know that, the loan begins to look more like an undisclosed lobbying expenditure on the part of Tiffany. Which in many ways is even worse for Gingrich. There must be official rules about accepting interest-free loans from companies lobbying your committee. Is there a case to be made that Callista Gingrich broke those rules?

The jewelry chain’s regular customers pay 21% interest on their credit purchases. That means Newt avoids a shocking $105,000 in interest payments per year when he uses his whole $500,000 credit line to buy more bling for his new mistress, whomever she might be. (When will we meet Mrs. Gingrich No. 4? Very soon, we bet! And No. 5 must be waiting in the wings somewhere, perhaps in an exclusive middle school in the white suburbs of Atlanta.)

The fantastically espionage-y SpyTalk blog has these details:

At the same time Tiffany & Co. was extending Callista (Bisek) Gingrich a virtual interest-free loan of tens of thousands of dollars, the diamond and silverware firm was spending big bucks to influence mining policy in Congress and in agencies over which the House Agriculture Committee–where she worked–had jurisdiction, official records show.

Filings by Tiffany’s lobbyist, Cassidy & Co., and other government records show that the firm’s spending on “mining law and mine permitting-related issues” in Congress, as well as the Forest Service, the Interior Department, and Interior’s Bureau of Land Management shot up sharply between during the period when Callista Gingrich was chief clerk at the House Agriculture Committee.

Newt Gingrich is really giving us a lot, journalistically speaking, considering he only ever got to about 6% in the Republican polls this year. We may well need Sarah Palin to get in the race, after Newt pulls out in shame …. which, come to think of it, is probably something he does a lot. [Felix Salmon/SpyTalk]

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194 comments

  1. Barb

    "Callista (Bisek) Gingrich"
    Well, that explains it! If she is into Bi-sek she deserves jewelry.

    1. riverside68

      It also explains higher jewelry expenses, two of everything costs more

      But Callista better watch out, newt may be interviewing 4 and 5 in the mix.

      On the other hand Callista can keep an eye, and other parts, on the competition, and if Newt gets fresh snatch regularly, maybe his love of country won't force him to leave Callista.

  2. memzilla

    It's like when Homer Simpson says out loud the mental conversation he's having within his thought balloon, and congratulates himself for not saying it out loud.

    The difference is, Homer Simpson is unwaveringly faithful to his first and only wife, and Marge has only the one pearl necklace.

    1. horsedreamer_1

      Obviously, you have not seen Not the Simpsons XXX (or whatever they called it). Live-action Springfield porn!

    1. Swampgas_Man

      Nawww, Burns looks more human. That there's a Newtron Sex-Robot, w/ the plastiFace™ technology.

      1. SorosBot

        Drugged-out Calista looks like she's probably like a lot of right-wing women, whose idea of sex is to just lie back while the guy does all the work.

          1. KeepFnThatChicken

            I am laughing so hard at all these, I can't even upfist. The mouse keeps jerkin' up and down over the button.

    1. Geminisunmars

      I think you may have just given them a marketing idea! Look for it in their Christmess Catalog next fall!

    2. Negropolis

      "Solid Silver Sex Toys" is the tentative/working title of Paris Hilton's next memoir, right?

  3. Grief_Lessons

    Does either of them work with the potato chip industry? 'cause the fatass looks to have gone through a few hundred grand worth of them, too.

    1. horsedreamer_1

      After a call from Lionel Hutz, Pringles made sure that "once one pops, one cannot stop".

      Gingrich cannot stop.

      1. Biel_ze_Bubba

        "once one pops, one cannot stop". That explains Tripp, or Trike, or whatever.

    1. Jukesgrrl

      Yeah, she would do him before they were married, but when he wanted to put a ring on it she made him convert. That counts as devout, fer sure.

  4. BaldarTFlagass

    It's pretty easy to portray yourself as "fiscally prudent" when you get all your shit for free, as kickbacks and such.

    1. prommie

      So long as your cocaine and hooker expenditures don't exceed your bribery income, you are prudent as can be. Prudent like Charlie Sheen, winning.

  5. BarryOPotter

    Sarah Palin to get in the race, after Newt pulls out in shame ….

    "Lou Paidlin! You're up! Now get in there and get us some hits!"
    How does Calista Bisek, er, feel about this? Oh. I see. Uh, never mind…

    1. YasserArraFeck

      Newt doesn't pull out. He doesn't wear no friggin' condom neither – it's up to the wife/girlfriend du jour to ensure there are no "Little Newts"

      1. Jukesgrrl

        Calista better be in menopause already or he's playing with fire, given that "devout Catholic" thingee.

        1. SarcasticNymph

          Are you nuts? "Catholics" of Calista's social class use contraceptives, and they get abortions. It's trashy to get pregnant out of wedlock or to have too many kids. That's for the gullible rubes.

  6. Oblios_Cap

    I'm sure an Ethics Committee somewhere is drafting a sternly-worded letter to send to Newty-newt even as we speak.

  7. KeepFnThatChicken

    She gave herself diamonds?!

    .

    [twenty minutes later]

    .

    …then why fuck Newt?

    1. Jukesgrrl

      I'm sure she understands that all gifts from Republicans have to be laundered prior to presentation. If they can make it look like you bought it yourself, all's the better. Palin wishes the RNC knew how to do that when she got all those clothes.

  8. Eve8Apples

    "Newt Gingrich is really giving us a lot, journalistically speaking, considering he only ever got to about 6% in the Republican polls this year. "

    If Newt keeps on the current trajectory, his polling numbers will soon match the interest rate on his Tiffany account, 0%.
    Keep fuckin' that chicken Newt.

    1. mrpuma2u

      I think the evil amphibian knows he is going down in flames around New Hampshire or so. My personal suspicion is he trying to parlay all this hoo-hah around him into a weekly talking head gig on fuxsticks news.

      1. Eve8Apples

        I don't think he'll make it Iowa. He doesn't have the fortitude to withstand the negative press week after week. He's a coddled, momma's boy. No serious financial supporter is going to back his campaign. It's amateur. I suspect he'll withdraw before Labor Day.

      2. Jukesgrrl

        But in the meantime, he's making a nice dime off that little book and DVD company of his. He's not stupid enough to spend the profits from that on his campaign.

  9. horsedreamer_1

    Looks like Callista is plumping her resume in case she has to come back to Wisconsin to run for Governor in a re-call election. We might be able to dump Scooter, but there's always some other udder-billy grifter from not-Milwaukee & not-Madison to ransack the Dairyland.

    1. Pithaughn

      Ha, good one. Took me a second. That is totally within the realm of the possible , especially coming from Newt who said in public, if you repeat what I said it is a false hood or some such double speak.

  10. Oblios_Cap

    Thank God Newt told us about this or we would have never known. Thanks, Lame Stream Media!

    1. bumfug

      There is no specific age. The exact wording of the statute is "Old enough to bleed, old enough to breed".

  11. tcaalaw

    Damn you for that graphic, Wonkette, Jr.! Now I'm never going to be able to masturbate to Audrey Hepburn pictures without imagining Newt's porcine face alongside her's.

  12. philpjfry

    How much self delusion can one man have? He has almost zero support and more baggage than all the hotels in NYC, and he thinks he has a chance of being elected President? Calsito must whisper in his ear how kinky she could be as first lady.

    1. Pithaughn

      I look exactly like Newt, I hope he runs like Hilary did, just keeps on even after the math is 100% against you. Now I'll go and call my old novelty act agent and start cashing in on my disability.

  13. baconzgood

    It's even worse. As a man I can understand paying $500K to ass fuck some perky tity intern and toss her to the side when she gets too whiney…. But to TAKE 500K to fuck national parks…….Man!!! That's fucking stones on that man.

    1. V572..whatever

      "As a man I can understand paying $500K to ass fuck some perky tity intern…"

      We've all been there.

  14. BaldarTFlagass

    The thing is, all this sleazy slimy shit will probably be worth 3 or 4 points in the polls for the Republican nomination. "Well, he certainly knows his way around the system, so, yeah, I'd vote for him."

  15. Terry

    Newt, goddamn you to hell. I love looking through a Tiffany catalog, pretending like I could buy those diamond necklaces. It's a simple pleasure and I'm not hurting a soul in doing it. But nooooooooo…… you and your fat ass and your bleached blonde botoxed wife have to come along and ruin it for me. You just had to, didn't you? Newt, for this and a long list of other offenses, you can just kiss my pink arse.

    1. ShaveTheWhales

      Mikimoto. Admittedly, just cultured pearls, but they're perfectly matched. Even I thought they were marvelous.

      1. Terry

        Yes, they are part of my jewelry porn repetoire. Love love love Mikimoto. Do not own any, though. Haz a sad.

  16. JoshuaNorton

    Newt Gingrich
    You’ll lose by a mile
    because you just lack style
    but hey

    Paul Ryan
    Has you cryin'
    Wherever he’s goin'
    They're going that way …

    True grifters
    Want to win in twenty twelve
    there’s such a lot to delve
    But, see….

    They’re after the same rainbow’s end
    waiting round the bend
    Palin is their friend.
    Newt Gingrich — OMG!!

    1. carlgt1

      And I said, what about
      teabags at Tiffany's
      she said – with wide eyes –
      I remember the loans
      As I recall – I think –
      we both kind of signed it
      well then that's more cash for us all…..

  17. MissTaken

    I love how in the blingee Callista looks like she has a Tiffany dog-collar on. Because nothing says "I love you more than my first two wives" than a shiny bitch bauble.

  18. FidoMcCokefiend

    Only a Republican with a $500,000 line of credit at Tiffany's can get away with accusing other people of being "elitist."

  19. Oblios_Cap

    The only reason to wait a month for sex is if the girl is 17 years and 11 months old.

  20. HobbesEvilTwin

    after Newt pulls out in shame ….

    shame is not a word in that fat fuck's vocabulary.

  21. BaldarTFlagass

    Tell ya one thing, if I was a Tiffany's customer, and paying 21% interest on the shit I had bought on credit, I would be really fucking pissed off right about now.

    1. Gunner Asch

      I dunno, if you're brain-dead enough to buy that stuff to begin with you probably don't have the math skills to realize that 21% interest is an owie. Don't these people realize that Dollar Store carries shiny baubles too?

  22. Wadisay

    Mrs. Gingrich #4 is today working in a brothel in Bangkok, and will convert Newt to Bhuddism.

    1. tessiee

      If I remember my science classes correctly, every action has an equal and opposite reaction.

  23. gef05

    "There’s an irony here: we only know the loan was interest-free because Newt Gingrich went on TV to say so, in order to try to portray himself as fiscally prudent."

    Just reread the article. And it struck me as funny – that a man could claim to be "fiscally prudent" when he has a half-million dollar credit line at a jewelery store.

  24. Chet Kincaid

    The Newts probably used the account like the music subscription services out there–all the jewelry you can eat. With no interest being charged, she could just "check out" whatever baubles she wanted and return them.

  25. CapnFatback

    The ABSOLUTELY WORST thing about this Newt scandal? I've been forced, out of my sheer need to know every detail about even those things that annoy the bile out of me, to look up the idiot band that sang that godawful song back in the '90s.

    In other words, let this be the official Deep Blue Something comment and be done with it!

  26. Pres[ $ rm -r * ]

    When all else fails and you can't find a real job, start producing Republican porn. The Source says…

    Callista Louise Gingrich, née Bisek (born March 4, 1966) is the President of Gingrich Productions, a performance and production company focused on audio, video, and photographic production. She is married to former Speaker of the United States House of Representatives Newt Gingrich. … Gingrich and her husband host and produce historical and public policy documentary videos. Recent films include A City Upon a Hill, America at Risk, Nine Days that Changed the World, Ronald Reagan: Rendezvous with Destiny, Rediscovering God in America, Rediscovering God in America II: Our Heritage, and We Have the Power. … Gingrich is the voice for several audio books, including To Save America; Valley Forge; 5 Principles for a Successful Life; Drill Here, Drill Now, Pay Less; The Art of Transformation; Real Change; Contract with the Earth; and Rediscovering God in America. She is also the voice for American Solutions for Winning the Future, a "tripartisan" organization for political and governmental change.

    1. V572..whatever

      Looking at the oeuvre, she's like a Republican Robert Altman or Martin Scorsese, only without any taste, wit, talent, or ability to select subject matter.

    2. natoslug

      Considering we have a two-party system, what the hell is a tripartisan? And what exactly does the voice of ASSWIFE have to say? I did get the acronym right, didn't I?

    3. mourningnmerica

      They forgot "Feces Covered Narcissist: The Newt Gingrich Story".

      But seriously, this is the most spectacular face plant of a campaign ever. I can't recall anyone fucking up this spectacularly. It is hilarious beyond words, and I am dreading the day that he drops out.

    4. easynewz

      Callista Louise Gingrich, née Bisek (born March 4, 1966) is the President of Gingrich Productions, a performance and production company focused on audio, video, and photographic production.

      Hmmm, something tells me that she is making the campaign stuff for Newt and 'selling' them to the Newtster. Kinda like Brisdull handles 'comunications' for SarahPAC. Corruption nepotism at its finest.

    5. tessiee

      "Callista Louise Gingrich, née Bisek (born March 4, 1966)"

      She's only 45?
      Being married to Newt is taking a dreadful toll, no?

  27. V572..whatever

    "There must be official rules about accepting interest-free loans from companies lobbying your committee." You'd think some reporter would look into this! Maybe if you ask someone, Felix…

  28. James Michael Curley

    When Newt pulls out he takes a shower and goes to the club to tell all the boys about it.

  29. Chet Kincaid

    NBC has the Playboy Club '60s show coming up, ABC has the Pan Am Sexy Stewardesses show…why bother going back that far? A current-day Lobbyist show would apparently be indistinguishable from Mad Men.

  30. Sassomatic

    So being a morally corrupt politician willing to sell out the American people to the highest bidder is "fiscally sound"? Yeah I guess it is. Where do I sign up for this financial responsibility?

  31. Nixon_So_Fine

    My fist finger hurts from so many up-fingers in this thread. Junior, that 'shop is almost too good for Wonkette, also, too.

  32. gullywompr

    What is it with the Republican wife blonde hair and the botox forehead and the pancake makeup until they look like they came out of the doll aisle at Toys-R-Us? It's almost enough to make you miss Barbara Bush.

    1. tessiee

      "What is it with the Republican wife blonde hair and the botox forehead and the pancake makeup"

      I think there's a factory in Stepford, Connecticut that makes them.

  33. glamourdammerung

    I recall Newt being quite indignant that rich person Chris Dodd got a reasonable good deal on a home loan, which just makes this another case of "Newt being Newt".

  34. proudgrampa

    "Meet the Press," "Face the Nation," "This Week" have got to stop giving legitimacy to this asshole. He needs to be completely removed from the news cycle.

    As for Mrs. Newt: I'd hit it. With a baseball bat.

  35. BlueStateLibel

    Oh lord, it's bad enough we pick on the poor oil companies and Wall Street, but now we must pick on the poor rich folks' pretentious jeweler of choice? How will our embattled upper class get by without distinguishing themselves with the all-important Made by Tiffany logo? Leave Tiffany alone!

    1. tessiee

      "Leave Tiffany alone!"

      Should be shouted with tear-streaked eye-liner in a youtube video.

  36. Worthly[♬♪♬♪♫♪♬]Skum

    And No. 5 must be waiting in the wings somewhere, perhaps in an exclusive middle school in the white suburbs of Atlanta.

    Gingrich Marital Arts Academy accepts only the most talented young women. Each prospective student must demostrate a thorough understanding of the written works of Richard Burton and the ability to swallow an entire banana in one bite.

    1. tessiee

      "Gingrich Marital Arts Academy accepts only the most talented young women."

      And annually turns away dozens who mistakenly thought it was a *Martial* Arts Academy.

  37. donner_froh

    "There’s an irony here: we only know the loan was interest-free because Newt Gingrich went on TV to say so, in order to try to portray himself as fiscally prudent."

    Irony may not be exactly the right term. How about stupid? As in Newt is so fucking stupid that he thought this would make him look better instead of even more like a douche bag.

    1. anniegetyerfun

      Whenever Republicans, even the ones who don't like Newt, go on TV to defend him, they always say something like, "He has really interesting ideas." I think they mean this sincerely, but they shouldn't. He has really fucking stupid ideas.

  38. DemonicRage

    Why is there so much talk in the news today about Sarah Palin and her Arizona house? Can't the Republicans see, this square headed man is the perfect candidate for them in the 2012? Close the nomination process down, right now. This Tiffany revolving charge thing is a sign that this man will lead the Party to a hilarious defeat in '12. Can Callista and Cindy McCain sing backup for him on all the campaign stops? They are so blondly wonderful together!

    1. Jukesgrrl

      Maybe it's just getting warmed up. I like the "his former floor assistant is now a lobbyist representing Tiffany's" that Chet brought us. Esoteric, but potentially lethal.

    1. KenLayIsAlive

      Haha. That's what I'm saying.

      Dear American Citizens,

      A pair of diamond earrings and a stained glass lamp has more representation in congress than you.

      Suck it!

      The GOP.

    2. Biel_ze_Bubba

      Public lands. Silver mining.
      That's two dots — see if you can connect them.

  39. FidoMcCokefiend

    Fuck Yeah! Viva La Revo…

    Hey did you see who won Idol last night? Can you believe that? I don't really care for Idol as much now that Paula isn't on. Are you gonna watch that new Colin show? That sounds like such a ripoff, but I can't help myself Colin is so much fun to watch. Hey did you see that new Mountain Dew Flavor that just came out? It's supposed to taste like a mix of Red Bull and Cheetos! What were we talking about?

    1. Dashboard_Jesus

      yeah, perfect…sums up my thoughts on the sad state of affairs in 'Merka EXACTLY, we are SO doomed! but wait, who won DWTS this season?

    1. mayor_quimby

      It all depends on what the whore had to do to get one. Callista's were really, ReALLY EXPENSIVE. Soul breakingly so.
      Why can't my prudish phone type 'whore'?

    1. V572..whatever

      I gave them to charity. It was the right thing to do. Now HistoriCat doesn’t have to act so needy.

      1. HistoriCat

        Hey now! I'm not needy.

        Well, no more needy than any other member of the Wonketteriat.

        1. V572..whatever

          That was a very good comment, Historicat! Of all the comments on Wonkette today, yours was one of them!

  40. Native_of_SL_UT

    OK Wonkette editor. It is time. Give Wonkette Jr. a byline with their own name on it. They have firmly placed themselves on the team with this one perfect line:
    ..after Newt pulls out in shame …. which, come to think of it, is probably something he does a lot.

  41. zappadoo76

    Will this finally drive a stake through Newt's heart, so we don't have to see him anymore, on the teevee?

  42. crybabyboehner

    no matter how many diamonds she wears, she is still fucking a disgusting toad

  43. Swampgas_Man

    Surely there's a society somewhere against cruelty to Sexbots.

    Though finding out this is all over good old fashioned greed and corruption takes the ick of Newtsex out of it. Somewhat.

  44. mrpuma2u

    Wow, the newt is a high priced corporate whore, with a sneaky corporate whore wife. I am shocked and stunned.

  45. carlgt1

    it's even more obscene Tiffany's charges non-corporate-whore customers 21% interest in an era when corporations get loans at what, 0.5% nowadays?

    1. HogeyeGrex

      Why would they need to spend lobbying money on the AgCom when they have Callista there?

  46. NadePaulKuciGravMcKi

    one more time
    Callista and Newt
    Newt and Callista
    Callista and Newt
    one more time

  47. ttommyunger

    Little known fact: Callista Bisek is a common name of Lithuanian origin and quite literally in that language translates as: "Ginormous Female Naughty Bits". Newt Gingrich, on the other hand, is of unknown origin, but is accepted universally to mean "Classless Asshole".

  48. alaninthecastro

    Come on, don't tell me you don't have a half-million dollar line of interest-free credit at Shane Co.

  49. keepintime1592

    …"after Newt pulls out in shame …. which, come to think of it, is probably something he does a lot."

    Thanks much, Wonkette! That image will probably haunt me for the rest of my life. Please excuse me now. I have to go wash my mind out with lye soap or something.

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