So happy about this Reuters headline, captured above: “Republican Gingrich defiant over Tiffany’s account.” And who said chivalry was dead? Really, who said that? We want to know, so we can send Newt Gingrich over with his maxed-out $500,000 Tiffany’s credit line and the cure for cancer. (Oh yes, Newt has the cure for cancer. It’s called divorce your old wife when she gets cancer.) But why shouldn’t he maintain a half-million-dollar Tiffany’s line of credit? Who knows when he’ll meet the next Mrs. Gingrich? Would you want to be cash short but romance rich when you meet Mrs. Gingrich #4?
“People should be free to spend their own money the way they see fit,” the former House speaker said at a campaign stop in Manchester, New Hampshire, noting that he and his third wife, Callista, have virtually no debt.
This is what he has to talk about at “campaign stops,” in New Hampshire? Oh, Newt. Newty Newty Newt Newt. Not with all the Tiffany’s product in the world plus all the Tiffany’s stock in the world would we let you touch us with your pasty little troll hands, you horrifying cancer vampire.
UPDATE: This really seemed to absurd to be true, but we’re new here: Newt’s latest wife was a lobbyist for the jewelry company, and that’s why Newt was rewarded with a half-million-dollar 0% credit line, because he also cheated on the law by favoring Tiffany in some legislation, so as a bribe he got this permanent zero-interest $500,000 credit line from the now-tacky jeweler. Guess it’s not really in my interest — or the public interest! — to dismiss anything at all as “absurd.” Can we do another post about this now? [Reuters]
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Breakfast at Tiffany’s must be more expensive that I thought.
Well, it WAS the only hit Deep Blue Something ever had….
Newt is a Shallow White Something.
Shallow WIDE Something, more like it.
That, too, also.
Newt is the shallow white puddle in the bellybutton of american politics. At least that's how I read it…
Looking at Newt, I'd say it's hella fattening, too.
Sounds like Jimmy McMillan's "breakfast, lunch, & dinner" at Tiffany's.
Newt is right on this one: why pay for chemo when you can buy diamonds???
“People should be free to spend their own money the way they see fit,” says the man who thinks a line of credit is his money.
But … I thought the Newtster was against deficit spending.
Are his grandchildren going to pay for this? And if so, will they ever be able to sort out who pays for which granny's bling?
To be fair, Calista happened to work for a congressional committee that Tiffany's was lobbying at exactly the time that the Newts racked up that interest-free $500,000 credit line, so it's probably better to think of this as a kickback in the tune of whatever the interest, over a decade or two, on 500k is.
So, in a matter of speaking, that -or more precisely, the lack of interest- is their money. It's just also, you know, a kickback.
Even reliably left MSM outlets like MSNBC seem to overlook this inconvenient fact.
Rachel's trying to save her job.
Ed Schultz might be beyond redemption, though.
Can’t really bear that Ed Show guy. Rachel doesn’t seem like the kind of girl who considers diamonds her best friend.
One could accept Newt being a horrifying cancer vampire if he wasn't such a perfect example of a disgusting human being and a washed up GOP mouthpiece.
You know who else had a $500k LOC at Der Blingen Haus?
All of them, Katie.
Tom from MySpace?
Lilo?
Mr. T?
It would take more than half a mil in Tiffany's diamonds for me to get near that.
Everybody has their price.
Callista's price is getting rocks for helping getting Newt's/Tiffany's rocks off.
Crack, diamonds, or both?
Mine, for example, would be removing the gun from one of my children's heads. Not my own…I think I'd rather die.
Do I get to kill him painfully afterwards?
The problem is that half a mil in Tiffany ice is probably only going to get $50k on 47th St.
If it was half a mil in cash I would think about about giving Newt 20 minutes, then I could sell my story to Enquirer, since I am a live boy. (I agree that does give me an unfair advantage over a girl, who would have to be dead to get the same coverage.)
I'm so old fashioned I think that Whore Diamonds shouldn't count until they're paid for. Much like whores themselves.
"I'll keep my diamonds, Bentleys, whores and freedumz, you can keep the change!"
Newt goes from abject apology for questioning Paul Ryan's plan to slaughter old people to defending his half-million dollar debt to a luxury jewelry store. This probably isn't how he planned his campaign.
Shockingly he thought it would have gone as well as Patton's campaign in Tunisia in 1943 or Rommell's in 1941, but that was under the (extremely faulty) assumption he was equal to either of them in the political arena.
Gingrich is Fake Southern for Fredenhall or Spinal Tap.
I predict that it will end up like Elphinstone's Afghan campaign of 1841-2.
I think Elpy's campaign of disaster will be considered a stunning success compared to Newt's. At least the doddering fool was at Waterloo. The best Newt can do is sing ABBA's Waterloo.
The thing is, Newt reached his Waterloo a long time ago, but isn't self-aware enough to remember that Napoleon did surrender, oh yeah, and he should meet his destiny in quite a similar way, instead of sticking around and annoying us.
"The best Newt can do is sing ABBA's Waterloo."
Upfisted just for mentioning ABBA.
All battle plans become obsolete as soon as the first whore is paid.
Good thing General Hooker got there before Gingrich did.
People do funny things when they've got a bad Koch habit.
Isn't that a Koch with a bad habit of deserting sick wives?
Duh. Winning!
"This probably isn't how he planned his campaign. "
I'm not quite sure how much "planning" was involved. I mean, given his track record of impulse spending and serial adultery, Newt seems more like a spur-of-the moment kinda guy, doesn't he?
We already had a president who "followed his gut." That worked out really well.
And before that, a president who followed his nut. Ditto.
You say that I'm just a fat faced loser
No common ground to start from
And I just get blow jobs
You'll say there's just nothing between us
but ethics have come between us
And I know you like jewels
CHORUS:
And I said what about "Bribery from Tiffany's?
She said, "I think I remember the price,
And as I recall, I think, you wanted to get some for me."
And I said, "Well, that's the one thing we've got.
Gah. The article itself reminded me of that horrible, horrible song, then you have to do this; and once again show how artistically bankrupt rock was in the late 90s (and has pretty much stayed until today).
Catchy tune, but unbelievably stupid lyrics. Perfect song for mockery, I think.
Is it any wonder the band was a one hit wonder?
1995-96 is late 90s? It was still Clinton's first term!
But trying to argue this, I feel like I'm standing outside a broken phone-booth with money in my hand.
I agree. Comments about 90's one-hit wonders are virtual insanity.
I know. For all that, she'll never be my woman.
Some would say Newt's debt has become cumbersome, but he just ran it up counting blue cars. He wonders if this debt will hurt him with the cotton eyed joes out there or if they'll think he's one of us, just a stranger on a bus.
Then again, maybe Newt is a Bandito, seeing just how far the Republican party wants to go. Or maybe he's a lovefool for America who loves us, loves us, says that he loves us.
Personally by my naked eye, I can see he's the natural one for the nomination. How bizarre.
Something something Verve Pipe, freshman. Something something, Hey, Macarena.
“People should be free to spend their own money the way they see fit,”
"People should be free to buy gold so they can fuck thier own mistresses the way they see fit"
(FIXED)
People SHOULD be free to spend their own money the way they see fit, and other people SHOULD be free to point out that some people are fat bloviating douchebags, the way they spend their money.
Not just a $500,000 debt it’s an interest free $500,000 debt. Plan to call Tiffany’s later see if I can get on this, some pin money would come in handy to stock up on canned goods and ammunition.
there's nothing to say the Blingrichs have actually paid back this debt. When the GoldenSphereHead left her Congressional staffer position, she no longer had to disclose her finances and no one knows whether this debt was paid off or simply waived by Tiffany's as part of their lobbying effort.
Newt's been claiming it's paid in full. He'd never lie to us.
Paid in full? The previous wife's life insurance came through, huh?
Tiffany's put out a press release saying that they have two types of accounts, the regular interest credit account and an interest free, one year to pay account that is directed at purchases such as engagement rings.
a half million dollar engagement ring? that bitch sure ain't j-lo.
Who's Tiffany? She some kinda hooker?
An obvious stripper name. Probably "Tiffani Sterling".
Tiffany Sailors-Lately.
http://unfairadvantagemusic.com/wp-content/upload…
She was a short lived sugar coated bubble gum pop star in the mid 80s
Hey now, Tiffany's much bigger now than she was in the 80s. That is literally bigger; girl got fat.
That's called the Kirstie Alley Effect.
a certain Thai ladyboy
(really,, that is one of their most common pseudonym)
Donald Trump's daughter. Look it up sheeple!
He's right. People should be free to spend their own money the way they see fit.
They just shouldn't expect to be elected to public office if they spend their money in certain ways.
Yeah and I am not so sure the issue is the spending of the money as much as it is the getting of said money. fucking moran this lizard person is.
I think it's both. After all, a president has to present a budget and he's proven he's not especially good at budgeting.
"You're not the king of me!"
"Life is unfair." TMBG
"I think people ought to be able to manage their own reproductive organs the way that they see fit."
There, fixed.
Well, yeah, they ought to be. How's that relevant, again?
"I think people who are not women ought to be able to manage their own reproductive organs the way that they see fit."
fxd fxd
Reflecting on reproductive organs puts me in mind of this, and I've been meaning for some time now to bring it up: Who's fucking this guy? How is this even possible? How could you get down (I'm a child of the '70s) with a guy who's named after a goddamn salamander? How?
He bought a very nice engagement ring there. It's inscribed "To Whom It May Concern."
I thought there was an underlined space labelled "her name here".
A peel-off sticker, actually.
Ha ha. Note to Newt: Trollops aren't going to hang around you just because you're such an awesome guy with a winning personality.
They say women like a man who can make them laugh. Probably not at the man himself, though.
Newt to TB: "Well duh! Why the fuck do you think I have a line of credit at Tiffany's?"
Trollops? Wasn't he a Victorian writer?
"I should be free to spend your money as I see fit."
Decoded for truth.
Speaking of panhandlers. A homeless guy walked up to me and asked for money the other day. Said he had nothing. I got a car payment, house payment, health insurance bills, kid's college, and on and on. Don't need a calculator to figure out that he, with nothing, is financially in better shape than I am. He still got a Lincoln out of me.
Jeesh, you gave him a penny?! Cheapskate.
"He still got a Lincoln out of me."
What kind of car do you usually give panhandlers?
I never give anything more than a Chevy … maybe a Buick, if the guy's got a good patter.
I thought the guy in the photo was Pope Benny reaching out his pasty digit to caress an altar boy.
But, no, it's just Da Newt and his detachable penis.
Suddenly, the old King Missle song seems fresh and new.
Well the real question is how is it that the Salamander got a "standard, interest free account" when Tiffany's regular interrest is 21%.
This is gonna get as juicy as Callista on diamond night.
Tiffany's has a special interest free account for special purchases like engagement rings that has to be paid off in a year.
That Callista, she doesn't look very juicy, she looks like she is one with whom the artificial lube is a sine qua non, if you know what I mean.
No body said anything about natural juice. All that KY can make a situation even juicier than ah natural
I guess buying that chick diamonds and other shit from Tiffany's is like dressing up your Barbie doll. That woman skeeves me out.
(And there's this guy from the GOP he's creepin' around Calista's canyon)
A fine little girl she waits for me
She's as plastic as she can be
She paints her face with plastic goo
And wrecks her hair with some shampoo
Plastic people
Oh, baby, now you're such a drag
Word of the Day: larval adj. Of or pertaining to former U.S. congressman Newt Gingrich
Newt and his bony appendage look like one half of the Sistine Chapel. The other half, of course, removed from this photo, is Callista reaching out with her diamond-studded clit.
You just ruined memories of a fine evening I had with a woman with a pierced clit.
Thank you very much. I feel as impotent as Newt right now.
What do you suppose a pair of Sterling ben-wa balls goes for at Tiffany? Couldn't find them in the on-line catalog. Maybe Callista could give them a call.
is that what you got for graduation, a vajazzling?
would you like it for graduation?
Maybe the worst single image I've ever had in my minds eye, and I sat through Slapshot II.
isn't this the sort of horrible deficit spending Repugs are supposed to be against?
“People should be free to spend their own money the way they see fit,”
They are. The problem is that if you are a politician and you shower your latest mistress with diamonds, then that has a cost in itself.
maybe diamonds ward off cancer in scary looking trophy wifes?
Yeah Newt, screaming "Go ask Tiffany's" is sooooo Presidential.
A fortune for Tiffany's, but nothing for rhinoplasty?
Tiffany's told the press they will not release any information about the Newt with the prefix, "At the request of Mr. Gingrich … "
Sounds like they are inviting a wikileaker.
Well, it's a whole lot more subtle than a bagful of uncut diamonds.
For tax purposes, an interest-free loan is income. The IRS might find it of considerable, err, interest.
Newt-another right-wing slut.
I wonder if he bangs the counter girl in the stock room when he goes to buy diamonds, because he loves his country so much.
It's been 13 years since this little amphibian troll has been relevant, and the best he can hope for in any primary is 5%; why won't he just go away, or the media just start ignoring him?
He must have a book in the works. Or a show at Faux News, if he doesn't already have one.
Define "media".
He has maxed out a 500K line of credit but he and Calypso "have virtually no debt"?
I can see why the RNC is in such fine financial condition.
Loyalty is a two way street. I think that divorcing wife with cancer pretty much blew up that street forever for Newt.
If he gets the nomination, you know he'll transfer the guarantor's name to the RNC, a la the Heath-Palin Gang's run at Saks. ("Piper needs a new pair of shoes!")
The fact that Newty or Mrs Newty ran up a huge debt at Tiffany's two years in a row is going go over really well with the ridge runners, swamp yankees, and hippies up in New Hampshire.
Both of them.
Where are they going to hear about it?
Newt is defiant over Tiffany's account, and positively recalcitrant over Debbie Gibson's account.
Upfisted just for the use of the word "recalcitrant".
This conversation about Newty's family jewels is making me all squirmish.
Jus' wondering if our favorite salamander will ask for a government bailout when he can't keep up with the payments.
Folks who have breakfast at Wal*Mart aren't going to vote for a joker who has breakfast at Tiffany's.
Since when?
Why would you believe this? I only wish they would open their minds as much as their mouths.
Tongue stud or nipple rings? What's your guess?
Penis ring?
Anal piercings.
"They're sick of the whole pooping thing".
"Anal piercings."
Wouldn't that interfere with his anal cysts?
Oh, wait; that's the *other* fat, man-whorey, draft-dodging blowhard.
Sterling silver ben-wa balls, with "Newt" engraved on one and "Callista" on the other. Everyone's doing it these days.
Newt should just buy a tiara and make himself king of the world.
Trig is a slut. Suspend me.
When you regard her anorexic frame or listen to her punitive screechings, does sex w/Laura Ingraham come to mind?
"Horrifying cancer vampire" is what you become when you eat Count Chocula every day. I think Newt is more like a man-sized leech, sucking humanity out of anyone dumb enough to let him attach.
"he and his third wife, Callista, have virtually no debt."
~ Virtually = $500,000. With the house and the wife's unpayable student loan, we only have half-virtually no debt.
Sure, people should be able to spend their money they way they see fit. Like for gay weddings, for example.
And what the fuck does Tiffany's need with a lobbyist? They're all fucking thieves and criminals.
So Newt waffles on Libya and Medicare, but decides to stand his ground on the Tiffany account? Is there anyone who still doesn't know that Newt's a sociopath?
Well, it's comforting to know that his home-wrecker bimbo wife was at least smart enough to get paid off first before balling this pudgy faced impotent troll.
She just keeps repeating "DiamondsDiamondsDiamonds…." to herself over and over until the grunting ceases, and she's off the hook for another week
Pretty much all you need to know about Mr. Gingrich is that for the last fifteen years his first name has been "Former."
Indeed. I mean, how can they not still appreciate the favor Truman Capote did for them? If I were working PR for Tiffany's, I'd walk out the door (or slit my wrists) – not simply because this story does them no favors, but also because it completely destroys their meticulously built and until now carefully managed brand.
The term "trickle down" should not appear within ten miles of any conversation involving Newt Gingrich – the involuntary images it conjures up are really too horrifying and nauseating to contemplate.
messy!
Unless, of course, they involve his severed head on a pike.
what cracks me up is these are the same sorts of assholes that begrudge someone an increase in their minimum wage. I guess (like Bristol & Sarah Palin) they just can't understand why people can make money so easy & sleazy!
well in tiffany's' defense–they prolly had no idea newt would be so stupid as to ever seek public office again, much less the presidency.
Hey, I think it's really cool that there are no more hungry people in Newt's hometown. BLING TIME!
Huh. Last night my ex and I met at her place to break the news to our son about her upcoming treatment for breast cancer (very early stage, caught early, tiny tumor, should be fine, but still…). I guess by Newt's standards I don't love America enough?
Suddenly I have a hankering to watch Dustin Hoffman force Gingrich to eat a couple dozen diamonds at gunpoint.
Gingrich has zero business holding any political office, running for any political office, talking about politics, being involved in politics, or participating in government or politics in any manner on any level. He is simply a moron.
Or existing.
“People should be free to spend their own money the way they see fit,”
Is he defending his line of jewelry credit, or GE's tax bill?
Barf-fast at Tiffany's?
Excuse me, may I have your attention please?
The next time this asswipe says anything at all whatsoever about the sanctity of marriage, would every gay person on earth go over there and kick him square in the nuts?
Thank you.
Even an old heathen like me can see that God's revenge on Republicans for behaving like such pigs is to make them *look* exactly like pigs.
See also Bush, Jeb.
Especially when you're making those romantic gestures to your spouse du jour.
Callista: "Good morning!"
Newt: "Huh? Oh… umm… (checks the calendar), good morning… (checks his diary) ah … Callista?"
It's true. he's a little on the dense side, and every time I see him, I'm a little offended that this is what programmers think that liberals would want.
This should make Fox news bragging about how they really pull the idiots in and have high ratings a little bit embarrassing for conservatives, but of course they'll never look at anything with these eyes.
I can't help but think that Michael Steele would have gotten more for the $500,000.
He can pinch a penny when he wants to, and by "pinch a penny" I mean Penny, the girl down at the lesbian bondage club.
Can't buy class, Fucko. That goes for your wife of the moment also, too, as well as…
over and over and over
Newt and Callista
Callista and Newt
Newt and Callista
over and over and over
Like actual diamonds, whore diamonds are also forever, it seems.
Newton, you know where your braind-dead constituency gets their engagement rings from? The jewelry desk at WalMart. Chew on that, you elitist, out-of-touch slug.
I'm Your Penis?
So, a probably irrelevant question. Independent of the size of his zero-interest credit limit, I think I've read that there have been purchases from Tiffie in the $250 — 500K range over the last few years. Which have been paid off. Groovy.
Who pays this motherfucker? And how much? 'Cause, look, I was a middle-management robot, and during my five best years I made, say $250K a year, and I bought my wife maybe $50K worth of jewelry. That would be about 4% of my income (I was giddy — shoot me) or 20% of one year's income.
If we assume the same percentage for jewelry, the collective Gingrich annual income turns out to be $1.25M to $2.5M. Now, people do make that kind of money, but not usually for playing French horn in a community orchestra.
P.S., Of course I know (more or less) how the scumbag has been paid. I'm just giving an example of how stupid he is to think that he can portray himself as an outsider.
And judging from the size of their tab at Tiffany's, cock rings aren't cheap either.
you know who else was a foreign-born leader of a nation that conquered europe and didn't understand the concept of russian winters…
Slowly poisoned by mercury-lined wallpaper?
Like a can of Crisco left in the sun too long.
And judging from the size of their tab at Tiffany's, cock rings aren't cheap either.
It's hard to get curly-ques and fleur-de-lys-enhanced inscriptions correct on something that small. No matter how great an artisan you may be…
You forgot the smell of sex and candy.
Mithridates?
Emir Musa ibn-Nusair?
"Hey, I know what the left would like! A stupid ignoramus blowhard just like Rush Limbaugh, but he's LIBERAL!"
-MSNBC programming wizards + profit and fun
That makes me feel like someone did steal my sunshine.
The 'Dancing Queen' ringtone is making more sense.
Wasn't there a Salon piece on how Schultz was probably kinda calculating on that front too, and suddenly had a complete 180-degree liberal conversion when he realized that Rushbo had basically cornered the market for ignorant right-wing blowhards?
I mean, if the goal was to make us somehow miss Olbermann, then (2,947 days since Bush declared) Mission Accomplished.
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