A special ceremony is planned Tuesday afternoon at McDonald’s in Fond du Lac for Don Gorske. That’s because, since 1972, Gorske has eaten at least two Big Macs a day, which means the 57-year-old will be eating his 25,000th Big Mac on the 39th anniversary of eating his first.
Good he got that in now. There will be no more sandwiches come Saturday, as that is when the world is ending. [Fox News]
{ 95 comments }
Can we get him a blood test stat so we can see his HDL and LDL numbers? Maybe he knows something we don't, and all this Lipitor and fish oil is just a scam by Big Pharma.
He must take some nasty shits.
Following his meal, Gorske exploded.
He shouldn't have added those 2-for-1 cherry pies. Iiiit's only wafer thin!
I'm sorry I can't make it. I can just picture it now – Don rolling in (literally) on his customized forklift-scooter, the Super-sized oxygen tank tucked into a sidecar, and the bumper sticker that reads "I don't take orders from Michelle Obama."
Don't forget the hovernutz.
Don't forget the truck nuts hanging off the back of the scooter!
No fair. I feel I should get an award for having eaten only one Big Mac during the last 39 years.
that's a lot of pink slime. yummy. http://videos.disabled-world.com/video/448/pink-s...
Newt Gingrich approves (he's the de facto Republican lard-ass joke as Huck isn't running).
If this guy can swallow 25,000 Big Macs, he'll probably swallow the shit sandwich Newt has planned for America. Go for it Newt!
Then again, Gorske is in the not-exempted-by-Scooter prison-guards union. So, he's prolly not a Teatard.
And ask for a second!
The autopsy will show his organs contain nothing but congealed fat and salt.
And Special Sauce! Don't forget the Special Sauce!
Special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, and a sesame seed bun.
Emo Phillips has really let his career tank.
At Least two big Macs a day? You mean, sometimes he has more? Ugh.
Hey, we all crave bad food when we're hungover…
For the record, FoxSnooze, just how much Brazilian rainforest loss does that represent?
Thank you.
The whole foam vs. cardboard box for burgers controversy seemed to miss entirely the fact that the most environmentally damaging part of a McD meal is the burger itself.
I was just upset that the shift from cardboard stole our McDLT. How can I eat a burger when the hot side doesn't stay hot, and the cold side cold?
Think of how much Soylent Green Gorske can produce. He can certainly feed the masses.
Apparently, eating Big Macs in great enough quantities eventually makes you look like Emo Philips.
American Exceptionalism in action.
Will Don Turnbee be joining him?
The American Dream: If you just dedicate yourself and work hard enough, you can accomplish any goal. But you'll probably decide to do something stupid.
This man Gorske has Peter Sellers' haircut from the 1965 film "What's New, Pussycat?" Or maybe Sonny Bono's from the same period. Proof of something or other, wot?
McNasty!
That would be the Mc Deluxe, a short-lived "California Burger" style offering from Mc D's. Horrid. Its only saving grace — it came around about the same time as the Mc Rib, so, at first, at least, some of the good feeling for the latter rubbed off on the former.
I'm trying to do my Weight Watchers diet seriously but was tempted to order a milk shake at the Sonic. (A blue company, btw). That is, until I saw that photo. Thanks, wonkette, for helping in my struggle to lose the last two pounds to goal.
Edit. note: What the fuck is up with that grotesque haircut and his ridiculous eyeglasses? He kept his receipts–as in, this was his goal? To have bragging rights at MacDonald's? Aim higher, weirdo.
I wonder who could down more Big Mac sandwiches in one sitting: Gorske, or fellow Wisconsin weirdo Mark Borchardt (w/ w/o a case of the munchies).
I think this might be just about as high as he can aim.
It's OK to be racist again.
There's about $30 grand down the toilet.
That would amount to about $50,000 adjusted for inflation. When he finds out how many hookers he could have had for that same money I would not want to be around him.
But, Wisconsin hookers. So… he made the smart move taking the Big Macs.
I must have a different definition of "objective".
That is a pretty amazing feat, considering that most people on all-Big Mac diet would never make it anywhere near 57; dude must have some superhuman mutant arteries. His survival is on par with Keith Richards' and Ozzy Osbourne's.
DUH. WINNING.
harvest that man's genes, stat.
And his cholesterol is, like, only 156* or something!
*(For any dumb, fat kids out there who were unaware, 180 or so is considered average.)
He can be the next Senator from Wisconsin. Now that Bob Graham (D-FL) is nearing retirement, we need a compulsive diarist on the make in the U.S. Senate.
What accounts for the markedly lower average level of physical
attractiveness among black women? Black women are on average much
heavier than nonblack women.
It would appear Satoshi Kanazawa doesn't like big butts and he will not lie.
But tentacle sex and subway rape……
But what about the fries? Wouldn't he have had to have eaten like eleventy million fries to go with all those Big Macs? That seems like a much more impressive record.
He doesn't eat the fries — he said so in that "Super Size Me" movie.
Definitely a mutant, though.
You'd think McDonalds PR would scoop this guy up. just look at his picture…..he is exactly their demographic.
To celebrate this epic achievement, McDonald's is renaming their downtown Fond du Lac Playland "Gorske Park" in his honor.
I loved Gorske Park. I have Bang on my MP3 Player as a guilty pleasure.
Say "da da-da da", stranger!
"…at McDonald’s in Fond du Lac…"
Does he get them on a stick and dunk 'em in cheese sauce?
Eating 25000 Two not that all beef patties, "special" 1000 island dressing "sauce", artificially green lettuce, processed cheese, overly salty pickles, dehydrated onions on a sesame seed artificially sweetened bun should come with a free colonoscopy.
Colonoscopy on a double Big Mac glutton would make about as much sense as exhuming Mickey Mantle's corpse for the purpose of performing yet another liver transplant.
"free colonoscopy"
There are some things man was not meant to know.
USA! USA! USA! USA!
Thank God he is not a union worker, as he probably still has health insurance.
25,000 Big Macs sounds like a pre-existing condition to me.
Somewhere deep within this man is an entire disassembled cow. I pity anyone within a mile of him when his death crap happens.
Not only that, but even if grumpy McD employees spit in his food once a week, he's also consumed barrels of grudge spit.
Must make T-Shirt that says "death crap happens". Must!
2 all beef patties
special sause
Letuce, cheese
pickles, onions,
on a sesame seed bun (25,000)
=
EARLY DEATH!
Obviously not in the case of Don Gorske.
If you click through he looks like a total weirdo but not especially obese. Maybe he orders the Big Macs with the apple crisps instead of the fries, and with fake sugar in the fizzy sugar water.
I call BS on this story. I have it on good authority that real American heroes subsist on a diet of souffles.
Thaiger Blood Love
Did anyone overhear:
“No, thank you Mr. Gorske!”???
I don't like onions or special sauce so what's the point. Plus did you ever try to "special order" somthing at Micky D's? It takes longer for them to make it than it takes getting your license renewed at the DMV.
Kiss, kiss. Okay, have some more bacon.
The wife of a neighbor, when asked to perform oral sex, supposedly said "…when that kid next door eats 25,000 Big Macs".
Good luck, Mr. Gorske!"
Even the actor playing Ronald McDonald is embarrassed by this guy.
So is the actor who played Ronald Reagan.
I wonder how much Mr. Gorgeske weighs.
I thought we were past this shit.
This Satoshi Kanazawa regularly writes s@#$ like this for Psychology Today, so apparently the pseudo-scientific community is not past this…
My grandmother made it to 91. Take that, Surgeon General!
Knew he was either retired already, or had announced he would not run in the next cycle. But, nice catch, BMW.
Has everyone eaten lunch yet? Good.
From the local drive-thru media's much more exhaustive report, here's a McList of TRUE FACTS:
- Gorske's taste buds have been on the fritz since birth (a condition exacerbated by a factory job spent working inside a tank), so he never knows whether or not he's even going to taste the Big Mac until he takes his first bite. (This could explain a few things…)
- His cholesterol level really is 156, and his wife is a nurse.
- His favorite color is "Special Sauce".
- Gorske is never without a Big Mac at the ready: He buys four every Monday, six every Thursday, keeps a couple in the freezer in case of emergency, and packs two in his luggage whenever he travels.
- in order to eat his 25,000th Big Mac on the 39th anniversary of his first Big Mac, he was forced to only eat one per day a few times this year. Doing so nearly killed him.
- His most prized possesion is the very last Big Mac ever made at the now-closed Fond du Lac McDonald's featured in Supersize Me; he keeps it in his freezer, and has the booth he always sat in stored in his basement.
- His friend mailed him a Big Mac from Hawaii, and after putting it in the freezer for an hour and then cooking it at 400 degrees for fifteen minutes, he ate it.
- In addition to saving every single receipt for all 24,999 Big Macs, Gorske also has a neatly organized collection of 10,000 cartons. He'd have over 17,000 cartons, but after a tornado hit his house in the early 90s and scattered them all over the place, he made the difficult decision (which he now deeply regrets) to burn 7,000 of them at his brother's farm.
- He estimates that he's drank about 200,000 Cokes along with the Big Macs. Since Coca-Cola discontinued glass bottles in the US, he's cut out and saved the UPC code from every single one he's had.
- Gorske has OCD.
- Gorske has OCD.
- Gorske has OCD.
- Gorske has OCD.
- Gorske has OCD.
- Gorske has OCD.
- Gorske has OCD.
- Gorske has OCD.
Most shocking part of this story? That he has a WIFE. Is said wife inflatable, perhaps?
Y'know, I'd never have guessed that he had OCD.
Weirdly enough, if he doesn't eat the fries, and doesn't eat too much besides his two Biggies a day, and maybe takes a multivitamin, he could well be fairly healthy.
His counterparts, who didn't have the genetic immunity to colon cancer, are probably dead, and not newsworthy.
If he'd eaten happy meals instead he could open his own Shit Toys R Us store.
it's good to have goals in life.
Talk about eating ass. The man's a pro.
This is one of the many Americans without a passport I'm guessing. Never even went to Milwaukee for more than 24 hours?
Downs Fisty like McDonald's I guess.
baconz, from whaat I've heard about your drinking habits, it may be possible that you HAVE in fact had a big mac rammed down your throat.
But bacons good, so…..mmmm….
Hmmmmm. I do like the boilermakers…….I'll get drunk tonight and see if I can recall ever eating one.
Not everyone can pull off the Justin Bieber look.
Don Gorske, meet Morgan Spurlock…
This story just hit the local news in Vegas. Why on earth…
What do you know, it's right there in the IMDb:
She must be so proud
A special ceremony? Like, a heart examination?
Hey downfister, fist this…
Actually Glenn Gould and Vladimir Horowitz are but two examples of great geniuses who had OCD-like eating habits, Gould eating scrambled eggs and arrowroot biscuit at every meal, and Horowitz eating filet of sole every goddamn day. So this guy's kind of like in their league in a way. Also.
It's true, but it isn't code.
Apropos nothing, upon following the link, I could not help but notice the high quality journalism provided by Faux News:
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Keep in mind, these are the "Recommended Stories" that Faux expects will intrigue its readership. Sadly, they may be right.
Counter-headline: Sandwich eats a hero.
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