- Here is what Congress is getting done these days: If Barack Obama wants to use the bathroom, he has to give House Republicans a spending cut they want. If Barack Obama wants to eat dinner with his family, he has to give House Republicans a spending cut they want. If Barack Obama wants to stop them passing a bill declaring white the official skin color of the United States, he has to give House Republicans a spending cut they want. Barack Obama can deliver great speeches about the debt, and he can kill all the Osama bin Ladens he wants, but it doesn’t matter. John Boehner will deliver inferior speeches based on glaring, elementary mistruths about the economy and still basically win. So how much is this debt ceiling thing going to cost Obama? [NYT]
- Osama bin Laden’s glamorous head-shot head-shots will be shown to Congress’ intelligence and armed services committees. But every member of Congress is still planning on bragging that they’ve seen them, of course. “We can confirm that we are also the popular kids,” members who are not on those committees said. [CNN]
- Osama bin Laden’s kids disagree with the murder of their father. Ugh, aren’t the families of murder victims the worst? Pound a beer with us, you pussies! [NYT]
March 12, 2014
Obama, Boehner Keep Fighting Over How Badly Boehner Will Beat Him
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