The conservative Internet has uncovered UNMISTAKABLE EVIDENCE that The Muslims of America are planning to set aside their Sharia checklist for a moment to avenge the death of Osama bin Laden. On Sunday, some guy from Vallejo, California on a flight from Chicago to San Francisco went nuts, screaming and pounding on the cockpit door, according to the Associated Press. This is something that happens on airplanes! People do weird things! Flying is freaky for a lot of people! In the same article, the AP notes another guy on another flight Sunday tried to open the plane door of the aircraft he was on. But that second guy isn’t of Arab descent, so the MUSLIM WATCHERS are only freaking out about the first one.
Of course terrorism is not mentioned in the criminal complaint. In post 911 America, if a Muslim rushing the cockpit ululating and screaming allahu akbar is not terrorism, what is?
Perhaps if the guy had a weapon of any kind, was trying to hurt people, or had ties to a terrorist organization? That would probably be terrorism, Pam! Sorry, we forgot, never go anywhere near a brown person, as they could lash out and murder you at any moment.
Yeah, we forgot, somebody on the plane said to another person on the plane that what other witnesses called incomprehensible yelling was actually “Allahu Akbar.” America’s most trusted source in news: a second-hand account from a person on an airplane.
Authorities have yet to say this is terrorism, because it’s pretty obviously not. But the people who really understand Muslims, bigots who have never studied Islam, know the truth: this was a DRY RUN by the Muslims, who will soon be inside every plane in the country, KNOCKING ON A DOOR. Scary! Don’t knock so hard, Muslims! You will kill all us white people with your door knocking!
Wait until they hear that some American pilots are Muslim themselves. Ahhhhhhh! [Atlas Shrugs/Fox News]
{ 119 comments }
And don't call me Shariahly.
Could have been worse, he could have stripped naked in the aisle.
How did they know she was with the Wu-Tang Clan? Connecting flight to Staten Island?
Aww, I was hoping for Keith Moon.
It's alright, stewardess. I speak mooslin.
They want the halal meal.
This is good news for Juan Williams.
"…we forgot, never go anywhere near a brown person, as they could lash out and murder you at any moment…"
Duh.
Can i paste that quote on my cube so people will stop asking me shit?
How do we get Pam Geller put on the terrorist watch list?
She's Jewish, &, well, they can be kind of brown, too. More the Sephardic than the Ashkenazi, but does it really even matter? She's an extremist of Middle Eastern extraction!
well, according to Now The End Begins, "we stand for America. we stand withIsrael. we stand on the Bible."
emphasis mine. so Israel is our friend until they all die during Armageddon or something. also, standing on the Bible? presumably because they're too short to reach the top shelves? god is my step ladder?
Forget this Pam Gellar nonsense! Need more articles about Sarah Michelle Gellar!
And Uri! There's spoons that need bendin'!
Of course terrorism is not mentioned in the criminal complaint. In post 911 America, if a Muslim rushing the cockpit ululating and screaming allahu akbar is not terrorism, what is?
Any statement by Pam Geller?
I just blew your mind. Admit it.
Shorter version of Pam Geller: "If a Muslim… is not terrorism, what is?"
This weekend, I endured Monica Crowley having a tirade trying to equate the Muslim Brotherhood trying to gain political influence in Egypt as being the same thing as Al Queda crashing planes into the WTC.
According to the second-hand witness, the full phrase he was screaming was actually "Allahu Akbar purple monkey dishwasher".
"sunday monkey play piano song. piano song."
Whoa there Jack! If you can't trust anonymous "persons on a plane" well just who are we to trust? Oh yeah, "Pam Geller".
Is she related to Uri? Can she bend spoons with her mind?
Even better. She can bend minds with her spoon.
"He might have seriously mistaken the cockpit for the bathroom," Almoraissi (relative of the man) said. "He's only been on three planes in his whole life."
(next on redstate) MUSLIM TERRORISTS THREATEN PLANE WITH PEE
You get extra PEE points for that headline.
And you know, it's easy to confuse "God is great" with "God I gotta go" in Arabic.
looks like i picked the wrong week to quit drinking. oh, wait…
Is there ever a good week for that?
opiate week. but you don't have to quit drinkin; you drink after the bender so maybe you can fall asleep.
Pass the glue…
I want to hire like 5 or 6 muslim people to follow Pam Geller around, everywhere she goes. Not to get close to her or even say anything, just stare
Performance art!
Is the witness certain he yelled 'allahu akbar' and not the more inflammatory 'derka derka?'
Enough is enough! I have had it with these motherfucking Muslims on this motherfucking plane!
Oh dammit. You beat me to it.
“It does not happen in any country, and this is a civilized society.”
Guess again, Mr Rahman.
But yet Victoria Osteen gets a pass? http://abcnews.go.com/TheLaw/story?id=5524479&...
He was actually screaming "Admiral Akbar!"
They did make excellent table radios.
It's a trap! To expose the paranoid racists like Geller as the paranoid racists they are, again.
It's a trap!
"Pam, you've got a letter from the insane asylum."
"Insane asylum! What is it?"
"It's a big building full of crazy people, but that's not important right now."
I'll admit, she has a point. Whenever those damn Jehovah Witnesses knock on my door with their Watchtower I want to immediately call the CIA and have them sent to Gitmo. In post 911 America, if a Religious Zealot interrupting my morning cunnilingus and preaching at me is not terrorism, what is?
If you need a second tongue, just ask.
Double your pleasure, double your fun!
I'VE HAD IT WITH THESE MOTHERFUCKIN' SHEIKHS ON THIS MOTHERFUCKIN' PLANE!!!!!!!
You'd prefer Trojans, perhaps?
And that's why we call Pammy Atlas the shrieking harpy.
P.S. I'll be here all week…try the
vealharpy rant generator.~
He was just upset that the airline didn't properly accommodate his drinking problem by providing enough towels. His shirt was positively soaked.
Pam Geller would have loved the terrorist attack I did on my cat the other day, ululating and screaming "Allahu Akbar" at her when she made a play for the bowl of clam chowder I foolishly left unguarded on my kitchen table.
Receipt for Zombie Cat
1. Find dead cat.
2. Open can of tuna with electric can opener.
3. Zombie Cat.
Is your cat a Persian?
They didn't mention the bag of dog poop that he set in front of the cockpit door and set afire before knocking?
And I thought the only Drudge sirens of the day would be for this:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2011/may/10/brist...
Damn I was hoping I was hallucinating again. It is sooooo much more sensible than reality.
"As-yet-identified charity"
So basically whichever charity is willing to spend more on overhead (read:her) than any actual, you know, charity work. Start bidding, United Way!
So, according to all these bigoted reactionary assholes we should just round up the moslems and put them in FEMA camps. And then we'll round up all the "conservatives" and put them in the SAME FEMA camps. Hilarity ensues.
It worked out well for them in the Handmaid's Tale.
She has a point. If we don't stop the Mulsins today from knocking on our doors and running away. Tomorrow they might TP our houses.
Or fork our lawns, for Sharia.
Can't wait for the new laws that will start springing up in state legislatures all over Merika: Mooslims are prohibited from planes and must travel by camel.
I hope Oklahoma is first !!
we should start a pool. Oklahoma, Arizona…what other state is crazy enough, right now?
Don't count out South Dakota. & Iowa.
On the plus side, hardly anyone wants to go to any of these states.
Any one of them with a Republican Gov.
wingnut futures.
i know–sounds contradictory.
I wonder if this Geller woman carries extra pairs of panties in her purse, or wears Depends, so she won't have to go home and change clothes every time she excretes a doughy pantload in Muslim-fear.
I liked Pamela Geller more in her spoon bending days.
"There is no spoon, errr, crescent moon."
Really, do the Gellers and her ilk have weekly meetings to see who can be the biggest asshole and embarrass us more? Prizes to include WalMart gift cards and super-size Freedom fries.
Someone should tell Ms. Geller that it's the Muslims who aren't dressed in robes and screaming that she should be worried about. That should calm her down a whole bunch.
Lets allow that Pam Geller is right about one thing: It's frightening — terror-y — to be on a plane while someone is trying to breach the cockpit door. Does he have comrades? A knife? Anthrax? I admit it: I'd be frightened.
But this is just another in a series of strange, half-assed (literally, for the underwear bomber) events that say more about our fears than al Queda's capabilities.
Ever been inside a
TurkishRomanian black-site?So a Muslim knocked on a door. This is terrorism? What, did he leave a flaming bag of Sharia or something?
If this fails, the Muslims will move on to their next tactic, sitting outside your house and clinking bottles together, demanding that you, "come out to plaaaayyy."
Crusaders, come out and plaaaaayyy!
When US Airways told me three times over the phone that I could bring my guitar into the cabin with me, and then stopped me on the ramp to the third of four flights to tell me I couldn't do that, I felt like rushing the cockpit, I tell you what.
When some mothahfuckah brought his guitar on board as a carry-on and hogged all the overhead bin space with it, I felt like rushing the cockpit too.
if you know how to play We're Not Gonna Take It you could've turned preboarding into a Twisted Sister video.
Those Mary Kay salespeople are relentless.
Pam Geller makes Sir Robin look brave.
Pam Geller's writing makes "Batman & Robin" look lucid and profound.
My main question is, was he wearing a hat made of bread?
Another a second-hand account from a person on the airplane said that the man arrested had been growling and muttering "Newt Gingrich for President".
So if he was wearing a Depends would he not have needed to ululate?
He needed to urinate. Pam Geller can't help not being able to cut through that thick, thick Newark accent.
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Allah Akbar!
Allah Akbar who?
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Fahood!
Fahood who?
Fahood, please! I am dying of hunger on this cheap-ass, infidel, no-food airplane!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Pam Gellar!
Pam Gellar who?
Why does everyone keep asking me that!
I picked the wrong day to give up the hookah.
Just had an unpleasant experience with US Air my damn self, turns out that you don't have a year from your original travel date to use an unused ticket, you only have a year from the date you purchased it to use it. Fuck them. I'm sure they and the other airlines will soon be charging 25 bucks for each carry-on item. Thank god for proletarian Southwest.
The were malignant enough as the spawn of Lake Central and New York Air, but when Phoenix-based America West (under the protection of Panamanian strongman Juan McCain) bought them a few years back, they reached new depths of crappy service and poor attitude. They still haven't merged their aircraft fleets and seniority lists.
And if you had sought to re-use the ticket within a year of its purchase date, they'd probably say, "No no, you have to re-use the ticket within a year of when the ink used to print it was manufactured."
Second crazy dude had one of them Meskin names. Now we need Chuck Norris on every flight.
My bud works for American. He lets me in on the "incident reports". Most are hilarious. I keep telling him to gather those things and make a show about the real airline industry.
Some of the things people do on planes is "crazy, man. Crazy".
Was he by any chance smoking a bong in the bathroom with his friend, Harold?
For Pamela Geller, I recommend liberal application of the Hitachi Magic Wand.
Repeatedly, to her skull.
The comments at Pammie's site are golden. They even brought out the old (slur?) mohammadan . That is some vintage, gilded racism there. I can just taste it.
Well aged turn of the 20th century racism. British Empire style.
Call me when they get to "Saracen". I'm going to take a nap for a while.
Only one A-rab? That's enough to make a trend for NYT.
Only if he's wearing designer band-aids or adopting a "caveman diet"
Pam needs a drug habit to occupy her time.
I do like how Fox wrote this up, with the other frightening airborne goings-on around the nation. I think the subliminal message for their readers is "don't fly, scary shit can happen," and I hope their audience takes that message to heart. Maybe I won't have to put up with so many full flights in the future.
Hey Pam. Show us your tits.
dear god no.
But shave first, please.
"Allahu akbar," eh? Are you sure it wasn't:
"Where's the bar car?"
or
"Halaal abbetoir?"
or
(The inflight meal is) "one farking snackbar?"
or
"This movie sux worse than Ishtar!"
or
"Jeff should be able to marry Akbar"
I beg to differ. It is a physical impossibility for a movie to suck worse than Ishtar.
I refuse to give that schizophrenic harpy a single page view. Here's hoping she decides to gargle some drano…..soon.
I'm no proctologist, but when Pam Gellar says "I hate muslins," she really wants to be the center of a bukkake circle surrounded by eight to ten large chocolately Muslim men.
I think I'm going to preface everything I say from now on with that disclaimer – should save me some time.
Poor guy, now he won't make his Herbalife quota for the month.
No, but some guys on the USS Carl Vinson have…
Knock-knock!
Who's there?
Mahmood.
Mahmood who?
Mahmood is always bad when I'm flying!
Ululating is a profoundly un-American act. Particularly when Xena Warrior Princess does it.
The rhythm method is so complicated. How do you keep track of when you're going to ululate?
Ten bucks that Pam has no idea what ululating is.
Joey, have you ever seen Pugsly Limbaugh naked?
I have a vision. It involves Pam, Victoria and Sarah doing the Prong Dance in an Asparagus Patch, topless, of course.
Comments on this entry are closed.