Score one for random chance: for the first time in the long history of C-SPAN, something interesting actually happened on air! Democracy’s best friend Andrew Breitbart (he’s also best friends with truth and journalistic ethics; pick one, Andy!) was on to talk about his book when he was asked to describe his “current relationship with alcohol.” We all enjoy alcohol from time to time, don’t we? That’s a simple question. But it’s not for Breitbart, who quickly got very defensive. “Why do you ask?!” Breitbart demanded. This is so odd. Why ever would that question hit close to home for Breitbart?
Then Breitbart turned the tables.
“Would you ask Barack Obama in an interview with him … what’s your current relationship with cocaine?”
Yes, that probably is what the media would ask Barack Obama, if they saw him at parties all the time stoned on cocaine.
An update on this item from a couple weeks back:
There is some amazing video of Andrew Breitbart from that cocktail party in Washington Thursday night, and as soon as the wrestling match between two very unlikely and very minor media outlets in D.C. can be resolved, we are going to post this video and a certain unnamed fun-loving conservative rabble rouser is probably going to be sharing a room at Detox Mansion with Lindsay Lohan.
We now hear this video is not going to be released. But what would be the problem? That video could have nothing to do with Breitbart being drunk off his ass and doing some questionable things. Because Breitbart doesn’t have a drinking problem. He never did. [Patrick Gavin]
{ 186 comments }
Fuck booze, I want to hear about his current relationship with his own colon. He seems to spend a lot of time up there.
I would describe my “current relationship with alcohol" as affectionate, perhaps even rather flirty.
My colon and I have not been on speaking terms for years, however.
Sure, Andrew has a drinking problem. He's outta vodka!
That's a problem I can relate to. Maybe he's human afterall.
Nope. The scientists (the ones not busy running from the torches-and-pitchforks gang, anyway) call that "convergent evolution." Like rats on cocaine or Republicans chasing young boys… but I repeat myself.
Yes, I'm pissing in the bird bath. Why do you ask?
Hold on, Riley. It's going to be a bumpy night.
We're gonna need a bigger ball-gag.
For Riley, or for Breitbart?
For poor Riley. To affix to Breitbart.
Riley likes the screams. They… excite… him.
Poor Riley — Is Andrew Breitbart gonna have to slap a bitch?
That's amazing, since there is nothing to his disheveled sweaty bloat to suggest such a thing.
Andy–no amount of alcohol will make you sound like a man, so give it up, girl.
Well, we know Breitbart's relationship with an a**hole, that's for sure (extra credit if you answered "indistinguishable").
He's got his head up at least one.
Dude looks like he just got off a five day bender. Probably smells of cheap scotch and cigarettes.
i thought he was drunk when the video started.
he's just unsavory on every level.
Was that "off a five day bender," or "on a five day bender?"
On a related matter: Do you know why Pirates do not get hangovers?
Cause they never stop drinking!
Don't forget farts!
The under-buttoned shirt is telling.
But the unzipped pants are yelling.
Ew.
He smells like an Olympic wrestler's taint.
Olympic wrestler taint reeks of Axe body spray?
Pre-cancer Christopher Hitches always had that look about him. Funnily, I'd much rather hang out with a smelly hung-over Hitchens than Breitbart in his Sunday best.
While defending Breitbart makes me a little sick (not to mention a significantly better person than him or any of his followers), I think he makes those odd faces to hide all the extra chins and it may not be because of drugs and/or alcohol.
And denial is a river in Egypt Andy.
to be fair, 'what is your relationship with alcohol' IS a loaded question.
It's a question about being loaded.
well didn't Hitchens have to field questions like this all the time? and he's 1000 times the intellect & writer & journalist that Breit could ever be….
"It wasn't a 'relationship.' It was more a one-night stand."
Why not just answer "Excellent!" and move on?
"When did you stop beating your wife?" IS a loaded question.
from that screen shot, he's about one Busey short of a Nolte.
Can we get an APB on R. Waggaman?
I’ll see your Busey and raise you two Sheens.
BigGreenLiver.com
We've all done some things that we regret while drunk, but considering the whole of Brietbart's existence, I think I can say, with confidence, that I've never been that wasted.
Watching Andrew Breitbart gave me a drinking problem.
I don't have a drinking problem, but I do have an Andrew Breitbart problem.
Andy, you'll never get it together if you don't follow step 1 and admit that you have a problem.
He's just trying to defend America from the Kenyan mooslim and his Crack Ho wife. That's what makes him so mad all the time. Shit, I get mad when I think about all the commies running this country. And I'm not a drunk. Really. I'm not.
I was rooting around the return bin for the 3d glasses used for the IMAX showing of Thor & found what I thought was a Cherry Pepsi bottle in the bottom, so I pitched it to the trash-can. Then, the contents spewed as the bottle rattled in. &, I had to wonder: why is the soda lingering on the wall behind? Turned out, it was dip.
Just, disgusting.
The thing I like most about this story is the implication that "rooting around the return bin for the 3d glasses used for the IMAX showing of Thor" is a normal thing to do.
Really, horsedreamer, you need a better hobby.
In his defense if I got free booze all the time I'd be drunk all the time.
Free schmee — you gotta want it!!
You've convinced me. I'm going to get stinking drunk tonight. I gotta commit.
Good lord, he looks worse than I did Friday morning after Cinco de Mayo. Let's just say my current relationship with tequila is hateful at best.
My relationship with Patron is co-dependent…
Describe your relationship with the Mezcal worm.
Demented and sad, but social.
I figured Bitpart's addiction was with rageohol.
I thought he was more of an assoholic.
Two weeks ago, there used to be.
I want to know what his current relationship with "reality" is. Divorced, from the look of it.
Divorced,and reality had to get a restraining order.
They still see each other from time to time but it's not serious.
BB is banging the booze. Ask her.
Sadly for him, Breitbart can't follow Mel Gibson's lead and blame alcohol for all the racist things he's done since most of them were clearly premeditated.
Nor can he ring up Jodie Foster for a job.
"…ring up…"
Ah think we got us another Limey here, boys. Get the rope.
No doubt that video was edited to show America's Savior in a less-than-respectable sight.
Fat vicious drunk muckraker is a fat vicious drunk.
Muckmaker is more like it. If Andy was a raker he'd be working with the real stuff before the edits.
How come you D.C. guys never share your saucy photos and videos? You don't want to "Spike the Football" on Breitbart's alcoholism?
Your move, Chris Hitchens.
just because he is starting to look like Zach Galifianackis in the morning of The Hangover, why do you ask?
Rest assured, Breitbart would never buy drugs from "Black Doug".
O/T, I thought "The Hangover" was just about the unfunniest purportedly funny movie I've seen in years. I like stupid-guy movies, too, being a stupid guy, but that thing was repugnant.
Todd Phillips is an acquired taste, I suppose. He's too crass to appeal to a wide audience, as does his supposed kindred spirit Judd Apatow, but not crass enough to have his films classed as "so bad, they're good", like, say, the film Machete.
Having seen the preview for H#2, I doubt I'll work to acquire the taste.
Wait, Breitbart's a drunk? Hey, he has more in common with us than we previously thought! (And he shares my first name!)
Hey Andy, come down to The Jury Room and first round's on me! They make a mean Sidecar!
Never offer him a drink unless it's arsenic.
I see his point his years of hard work and discipline in the field of journalism should afford him equal deference to that shown a sitting POTUS.
Well, maybe he thinks he's the least worst person there is.
That's what his "friends" all tell him, so it must be true.
Booze goes in Breitbart falls down. You can't explain it.
How da booze get dere?
Given the current Republican 2012 presidential candidates, how can we not drink ourselves to oblivion?
Given the current Republican 2012 presidential candidates, how can we not nominate Breitbart?
Q:So Andy – what is your current relationship with alcohol….
Andy – "Well, to tell you the truth, I love it like my gay lover…in fact I shove a bottle up my ass every night"
See, we're on the same page, you and I.
I wouldn't have led with a question about his relationship with alcohol. It's kind of obvious the guy is a raging alcoholic. I would have said, "What's your current relationship with underage cock, and does your current relationship with alcohol have anything to do with it?"
Alcohol is a crutch. Underage cock is a crotch.
Subtle distinction.
This is a trick question, right?
It depends on what your definition of is is.
Wait. Randy Andy went to Tulane? That proves he's had his legs in the air at Lafitte's at least twice.
There's no "relationship". He just felates the occasional bottle in a backroom until it's drained dry and then stumbles on home.
He merely has a "wide stance" whilst drinking, erhm, Rob Roys.
My drinking party has a no-brain slandering douchebag problem.
"Attenuated. At best."
Breitbart doesn’t have a drinking problem. He never did.
Breitbart's problem isn't with alcohol; it's with reality.
You forgot "in denial".
He's an obnoxious drunk…oh, he's obnoxious all the time.
I read the post originally as referring to an event on C- Span, as in "C-minus Span". Which explains so very much. Keep drinking, Andrew, and you'll be a regular on F-Span!
If there were any journalistic ethics any more, they would have asked Brietbart about his relationship with Riley.
I think he's just shocked that anyone would imply that Breitbart could maintain a relationship with anything or anyone.
Serenity Now!
No sober man would go on TV with hair like that, even if it is just C-SPAN. And actually, no man whose wife doesn't hate him would, either – expect that'll be the next scandal for poor oh-so-mistreated Andy.
Alcohol my foot! He hasn't put the pipe down since his appearance on Real Time last Friday.
Since you're always willing to brave the hell that is the Breitbart forums, has there been any mention of this over there?
Well, when they posted this story today:
"Whitney Houston Voluntarily Enters Rehab"
I wrote "Breitbart will be next". To which one person responded, "maybe he'll get your old room". Not bad.
That video makes me think Breitbart is actually a leftist from the local hobo jungle who is putting one on the Right.
No.
The middle of traffic in Dupont Circle looked like a nice place to take a nap. Got a problem with that commie?
Bring on the seals/SEALs!
Didn't Judy Collins cover that song??
No, that was "Send in the Glenns"
I think you mean Send in the Clow- oh wait, same thing.
I thought it was "Send in the Glans"
I demand to see his breathalyzer results!!!!!
Have you stopped drinking your wife?
The Least Douche-bag?
Some drunks are fun. Andy is an angry drunk.
Up fists for all!!!! We ALL knew troll would show for a story about Breitbart. Maybe troll IS Breitbart.
He's drunk AGAIN?
Drunk down-fisting. Passed down from father to son.
Methinks Andy needs to take a defensive drinking class.
Barak to BB: "Hee hee, that's funny, my relationship with cocaine. Would you like a piece of me cute boy? My Seals tell me you got purdy lips. Hey cut it out, no reason to pee on the rug, it ties the room together."
It looks like he has a wonderful, close relationship with alcohol. I, for one, fully support his rights to enjoy embracing alcohol in the privacy of his own home and, depending on the outcome of certain court cases, his right to marry the alcohol of his choice.
I believe marriage should be reserved for vodka and ice cubes.
Just as long as he doesn't marry Jim Beam or Johnny Walker. If he married one of them they'd both be dewers.
"I'm the least alcoholic person in the world!"
Why be a dick to the milquetoast C-SPAN interviewer? Is this so Andrew will keep awake?
Memo to Andy. don't show up to C-span interview dressed like you just got out of a police drunk tank.
Now there is some sage advice.
"What's your relationship with alcohol?"
We just good friends…but he does give me the encouragement to make indecent overtures to Riley Waggaman. (Riley…why won't you return my calls??!)
I believe Mr. Brietbart made his intentions known the moment he slipped a promise ring over the neck of that bottle of Beefeater's.
Mushrooms with Dennis Kucinich.
and his wife.
but without Dennis. He can go pick up the pizza.
He may be a drunk today, but tomorrow madam, he'll sure as hell still be a total douchebag
I agree: Obama's former cocaine use ethically absolves Breakfart of his alcoholism or any other fault. It's his endless craving for underage lads that's Andrea's real problem.
Breitbart would make an awesome homeless guy.
Um, a picture says a thousand words. Literally, in this case. He goes on TV looking like THAT and gets defensive when asked "hey why are you a drunken slob, as evidenced by how you LOOK RIGHT THIS VERY MINUTE YOU BOOZE ADDICT."
Or "maths" – that's a dead giveaway.
Also "lorry," "flat," and "lift."
I'm watching those sneaky Brits and their "humour"
Don't forget "boot" and "bonnet". And "Bob's your uncle!"
Yes, what is it with "maths"? Do the Brits have like multiple quantities of mathematics, you know, some extras kicking around to use as a spare?
Where else? And probably during Decadence.
Oh, going all evidence-y, are we? Where's that great Murken propensity to leap to conclusions when we need it?
In the run-up to the Iraq invasion, you were probably all squishy on the WMDs. Commie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Be careful. Riley will cut-a-bitch.
Speaking as a man who learned the hard way some very serious things about alcohol abuse, that was some of the funniest shit I have ever seen on tv.
That is how Repubs answer questions they don't like. If Dems were more confrontational like this with the media, the media would be more thoughtful in asking Dems questions. That answer is why Repubs get soft questions.
You have to be alive to die.
It's a war on war.
He's right – his problem probably isn't with drinking…it's more likely with looking around the bar in a haze and realizing that no one is anywhere near him – again! They were when he came in…
Oh yeah. You can just tell by that classy Lounge Lizard outfit, that 'Ol Andy don't have no problem with the bottle.
I did not notice until you pointed it out, but yeah, I dress like less of a slob than that when I was under my house fixing a pipe this weekend.
OMG. You guys need to get that video. Ask Larry Flynt for the money. He hates hypocrites and would probably love to be the guy who took Andy down.
Correction note DF. Thankee.
I like how asking him a question means asking Obama an equivalent question. Because Breitbart and Obama are in the same league. Obviously.*
*When you're completely loaded.
Don't forget the "lying manipulative narcissist!"
Obama never gets asked about smoking.
I particularly enjoy the automatic "on the same level" allusions of himself to the Prez. I dig that they have the whole "we both wrote books about doing shit in college thing" in common, but Andrew seriously needs to keep his comparative associations closer to his actual Tucker Max wannabe counterparts. And seriously, fuck that guy.
God, what a alike that guy is!11!1!1!
::::puts half pint in backpack for work…
Andrew Breitbart: Christopher Hitchens without the intellect, education, erudition, atheism, cancer, humor, or common sense.
That drunk needs an ass-whipping more than anyone else on earth.
And do you know who else had a relationship with cocaine before he entered politics?
Sigmund Freud?
Marion Berry?
Mr. Ed? No, that was heroin.
…“current relationship with alcohol.”
My parole officer asked me about this when he saw me hustling an empty 12-pack to the dumpster, one time.
So it was clearly a dry hump! What's the problem? THEY WERE EMPTY!!!
The real problem that Breitbart is going to have with alcohol is gonna come if he tries to take some of mine.
what do you have against michael bolton? you didn't like the jack sparrow song?
Dick Cheney.
The Bristol Palin Hour.
So we need to accord you, a political gadfly, the same respect we would the President? Climb down off that ego for a moment and get a clue.
But clearly the President of the United States of America is the egotist here.
On account of his moral weakness, duh.
Also, that video should be released.
"I'm not a drunk. Some of my best friends are sober."
Anytime you're stuck for an answer, change the subject to the Kenyan commie… seems to work for the teatards…
Well, if Andy is a drunk, there is always that slight chance that he will drown in his own sick. And if that thought doesn't perk you up a little, you just don't know Andy like we know Andy. Bottoms up big guy!
Apparently the alcohol has rotted his memory, because people did in fact speculate wildly about President Obama's relationship with cocaine and lameass media picked up on it and asked.
He says he has an open relationship with alcohol. But he gets insanely jealous and menacing when he sees other people enjoying themselves with booze.
Breitbart/Ashley Todd 2012!
The cocktail party video must be released! By any means necessary! America has a right to know!
Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease!?!
You guys are breaking my black-hearted heart.
It's not a "relationship w/ alcohol" if you're just paying the bottles to fuck them.
Why isn't this guy in jail, or murdered?
Because we are better than his sort.
The dude looked and sounded drunk in that clip. Maybe that's where it came from.
(Mr. Breitbart, if you have some neurological problem that explains that, I sincerely apologize.)
You'd drink too if you were a super-talented movie guy who has been blacklisted by the liberal powers-that-be who control Hollywood. Because the movie industry is dominated by liberals who put personal politics ahead of profit. Also, Andrew Breitbart is not gay, so quit being so mean.
If I was Breitbart, I'd be drunk all of the time too. It's the only way I could live with myself.
I like to think I've mellowed in my old age, but watching Andrew during this very short clip reminded me that he is one of the few men on Earth who ( if I could not immediately get away from) I would have to physically assault in a very serious way; just for drill and for doing what's right.
Video or it didn't hap- … aw, who the fuck am I kidding, of course it happened.
Release the video!
THE WHOLE WORLD ISN'T WATCHING!
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