'Osama bin Laden' Buried At Sea Moments After Being 'Killed'

• Good morning, America is #1, Never Fourget, etc. Is everyone still so excited about "Osama bin Laden" being buried at sea, just hours after being "killed" by the CIA? Our Government really went the extra mile to make sure Osama was buried with dignity:  "After Bin Laden was killed in a raid by U.S. forces in Pakistan, senior administration officials said the body would be handled according to Islamic practice and tradition. That practice calls for the body to be buried within 24 hours ... The U.S. decided to bury him at sea." Ha-ha, what, are yousurprised? Don't be! We have been robot-bombing/torturing/raping/slaughtering Muslims in accordance to Islamic practice and tradition for more than ten years. And that is why we hastily dumped "Osama bin Laden's dead corpse" into the ocean before anyone could get a good look at him -- because we respect Islam and all of its followers. (Just read that sentence a few times; let the sadness seep in.) Oh, and slightly off-topic: That pic of Dead-Laden was definitely photoshopped, according to The Telegraph. But don't let that stop you! Add that hawt foto to your Facebook Freedom album, and then tag the shit out of it! Americans love their Kodak memories. [ LAT / The Telegraph ]

• "WE DID IT! WE KILLED HIM! YAY! PASS THE JISM!"

• HOW DO WE GET OUT OF THIS COUNTRY?