Now that Donald Trump has declared victory on President Obama’s birth certificate he can return to the REAL issue of his campaign, which, according to this video blog from his desk a month ago, is that an actor in television advertisements for Geico should not be in those advertisements. Look, Trump likes the talking lizard guy. He can respect that. But what America does not need is a man who makes old white businessmen seem out of touch (HMM), so Trump is going to fix this, with politics. GET RID OF THAT GEICO AD, CONGRESS.
Trump puts up vlog entries on YouTube all the time, just like any other 13-year-old child. Here’s a vlog he released today:
Is that bronze thing back there John F. Kennedy, or is it supposed to be Trump? (Yeah, we all know the answer to that one.)
We do see what appears to a magazine with Obama on its cover over to the right, so he must be reading up on things. A magazine’s worth of things, just enough to know what asinine buttons to push.
The most interesting thing on this desk is the perfect distillation of Trump: a plastic ash tray with his name on it filled with some gaudy bits of gold. [YouTube]
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Can we get rid of the Hair Club ads while we are at it?
Oh, don't you worry. he has private investigators on the ground now, looking into that guy's background. You'll be very suprised at what they reveal.
Sorry…pee-anxiety made me edit the comment instead of adding a new one! The original was "I'm surprised he's not going after the Allstate ads( the ones with "the black" on them).
The Geico lizard has a better haircut, but Trump is scalier.
instead of watching those videos, I'm going to try to save some money on my car insurance.
I love it when they say,"You can save UP TO 15%… or MORE"
UP TO means not more than… MORE means… well… more.
Agreed, it's like semi-boneless ham.
Or being "only kinda pregnant"
…and that describes Trump to a tee.
Donald Trump's so easy a caveman can imitate him.
We should be discussing that Baron Von Moneypants had mob buddies who had ties to his casino. One was from an Asia mob, seriously. (allegedly)
The more he talks the more information about him comes out that he really doesn't want people to know.
Yakkity Yakuza, don't come back!
Oh noes Barb! You have yer *allegedly* on the wrong side of the period of your first sentence. Trumpette's attorneys will be descending in 3, 2, 1…..
King Combover's saving his hair for the new AFLAC duck.
Jack respectfully, I've had Donald Trump coverage up to here. *raises hand above head*
Get in line, slithy, but really, do you want to go back to dead rats in toilets?
Actually, is there any difference?
The rat still has a better 'do?
You got me there.
The Donald IS tiresome, but I look at it like this: a Donald post trumps a Sarah post every time.
Fuckin hate those GEICO ads. Stupid fucking lizard. He's not even from here. He's Australian, taking all our jobs.
He's not British?
New Zealand! How many times do the Flight of the Conchords have to tell you that!?
I thought hat was supposed to be a cockney accent.
It is. He sounds just like Michael Caine. If Michael Caine was a lizard.
That's what they want you to think. But I had one of my accent guys look it over and it raises more questions than it answers. Wake up, sheeple. Be smart. Get the facts.
BUILD THE FENCE!
He's British (Callum Blue, I think).
Mr. Trump? Irrelevancy is on Line Two and would like to speak with you immediately.
Yeah, I have a hard time believing Trump actually owns a "desk".
A mirror, yes, I can believe…
He's got those vulva eyes like Scarborough.
And that wife. She's squints because someone told her it's "sexy". She looks consistently constipated.
Mrs. Strumpette?
Oh, and "vulva eyes" is a keeper.
Didn't Kim Carnes have a hit with "Bet He Vulva Eyes"?
He's so proud of being wrong about the birth certificate, he can move on to being wrong about everything else. And when you're wrong I will be happy to point it out so you can be more prouder.
He's very, very, very, very proud.
"Everytime I'm by a television it's on over and over and over again…" – Trump.
Funny, I'm just as fed up with this other terrible guy who's always on the fucking teevee, pushing poop out of his sphincter-mouth.
Glenn Beck? Oh.
So he wants the Geico guy booted off the teevs but was perfectly happy for The Situation to do the worlds shittiest stand up spot, in his honor, at the roast.
Yeah, what happened to the good old days, when it was wall-to-wall Snowgrifter? At least she has tits.
So does Dondi, but his are real.
The only thing about her I either admire or covet is her shoe collection. Imelda Snowbilly has some amazing pumps.
The Guy From Boston and the Kid From Brooklyn both have better production values. And make more sense.
Shit, Basil Marceaux would outwit him in a battle of the minds.
Why is he sitting in that shitty used car salesman's office?
TAGGED:
* 2012,
* commercials,
* Donald Trump,
* geico,
* the frontrunner preaches,
* vlogs,
* youtube
What, no Reptiloid Threat tag???
Amerka needs to be forearmed (like Popeye), Jack.
~
needs moar Lizard People.
If Trump really cared about America, he'd buy the Progressive Auto Insurance company and have the spokeswoman, Stephanie Courtney, rubbed out.
I dunno, I'd kinda like to "do" her. Especially after I saw the bobble head.
There's a bobble-head now? I take it all back. We're looking at Trump's VP candidate here.
I thought she was cute back when she on Angel, but find the Flo character too annoying.
Who did she play on Angel?
Awww, I kinda like her. She reminds me of some the young punk girls who hang around the clubs–Roller Derby, Japanese school uniforms, dig all types of music; they're adorable and usually pretty cool.
That old guy is supposed to be a comedic version of Warren Buffett (GEICO is a subsidiary of Berkshire Hathaway.) I bet Warren loves those ads.
I guess we know which company refused to buy ad space on Celebrity Apprentice.
Trump heard about the individual mandate & got confused.
He thought it would lead to universal gay marriage.
Huh. I figured he was going after the Caveman for having better hair than The Donut.
Why "The Donut?" Because he is round, starchy, empty in the middle, and ultimately bad for you. In the background, he also has two pairs of scissors, one a lefty and one a righty, to show he is dumbedextrous; ie, incompetent on the right or the left.
Can GEICO really save you fifteen percent in fifteen minutes?
Is Donald Trump a self-aggrandizing, simple minded asshole?
Win.
He should just whip it out and start masturbating on camera, it wouldn't even add to the gross factor at this point.
Bad Candidate.
My Friend from Spain called and just Laughed for two minutes then hung up. I think hes be watching the American news channels again.
His head IS an asshole wearing a wig.
As creepy alive looking as that chunk of fur is, it may be more like "a wig wearing an asshole".
I kinda like that actor guy who thinks he's Humphrey Bogart but I really hate that Rich Fuck who thinks he's the next President.
Fuck all. Whatever he's paying that "wife" of his is not enough.
What about the guy who plays the character from the Geico commercial "Would a Drill Sergeant Make a Good Therapist?" R Lee Ermy
His spoke of the Obama administration, "We should all rise up and stop this administration from what they're doing because they're destroying this country. They're driving us into bankruptcy so they can impose socialism."
Did anyone try to get him fired from anything?
They tried, but he beat them up with a tire iron.
Yeah. He did that during a toy drive. In front of active duty Marines. He did apologize, but it was an apology like the one the carnival barker is going to make when he realizes he's no longer acceptable company and people start boycotting his shows.
Not hard enough. Geico refused to let him go, but they don't seem to be running those commercials, at least not on PBS, MSNBC, during 30 Rock or during Glee. I wouldn't know about the other shit.
He's another typical old geezer without a clue. Lots of them in my town, always reliving their glory days in the Pacific and driving into storefronts and bus signs, always standing around the local donut shop flapping their polydent jaws about teh socializms, too much money in the education budget, etc. I'm a near-geezer myself and I can't stand these idiots.
Props to all for serving their country (and to him for being awesome in Full Metal Jacket), but that doesn't make any Vet an authority on anything. Hmmm, why am I suddenly thinking about WALNUTS!1! ?
I personally want to watch a televised cage fight with Turdrump and the Nationwide Insurance guy with an equally bad haircut and the blue telephone. I think Nationwide chap hitting old Donny in the jaw with his tele-e-ophone and breaking it would be great entertainment. What would be even better is if we can pay the Nationwide guy (after breaking Turdrump's Jaw) to tell America, "the next jaw I will be break will be the first tin-foil wearing TeaTard who mutters the phrase birth certificate."
I see a perfect product placement opportunity for Head On in this one.
"We do see what appears to a magazine with Obama on its cover over to the right, so he must be reading up on things."
Or just looking at the pictures… he has investigators to read stuff for him.
And also, too… he can afford to build a friggin' ballroom for the Prez but he can't get an office big enough to have 2 stacks of magazines or a counter so he can spread those pictures out a li'l bit?
I find it interesting that I've never seen a photo of him with a personal communication device like a Blackberry. Do secretaries place and take all his calls, in addition to reading and printing the Internet for him? Does he even know HOW to text? I guess he's practicing for the presidency when the Secret Service won't permit him to use a cell phone.
We laughed at Skoal Rebel and it turns out he was ahead of his time.
Trump/Skoal Rebel 2012
…how China is taking our jobs
Is this twit for real?
China does not take our jobs. Our beloved Corporations give the jobs to China to make maximum profits on low cast labor.
Trump old boy, at least try and get some facts into your rantings, please.
Corporations like the one producing Trump's clothing line, natch.
Given his support of birtherism, I would have predicted Trump to instead go after those Allstate ads with America's first black President, David Palmer.
Where's Palmer's birth certificate? where's his insurance policy?
Lol, Soros! He went before Congress and tried to dirt bag the Indian casinos, saying that they would be "crawling with the mob" and that he's spent more on security to keep the mob out than the Indians (feathers, not dots) spend on their whole casino. Once you are lying to oppress competition, you rise to a new level of douchebaggery.
It's like the time I did a youtube and spouted off about getting rid of John Tesh…only not as drunk.
Was this to get him off of ET or to make him quit his lounge lizard piano man act?
Either one works for me.
"Get rid of" with extreme prejudice. Get what I mean….
My wife and I always do that dead pool thing at the beginning of every new year and every year I pick John Tesh.
Don't know why, just seems like a good idea.
If Trump promised to "get rid of" John Tesh while Prez he would totally get my vote. That piece of shit is the antichrist.
I love how The Donald says it's time to talk about China "taking" our jobs, as if American corporations' decisions to offshore manufacturing in order to get more and more profits for their executives and shareholders had *nothing* to do with it. Those damn Chinese came after us with guns–we had no choice!
Well it's not he's directly responsible for China "taking" some of those jobs, like in clothing manufacturing, or anything.
"filled with some gaudy bits of gold."
He keeps his own poo on his desk? Yeah, that fits.
That's what is encased in that shiny thing behind his left ear. That chunk of fecal matter is something that made him proud. "Look how BIG it is!"
Geico needs to bring back the talking pothole.
I don't think Trump is willing to do Geico commercials.
Palin can learn from this one.
Trig, maybe. Sarah couldn't learn if you tattooed it on her goddamn palm.
Well I've got to hand it to him, he certainly doesn't hesitate to tackle the country's most irrelevant issues.
Curious, they allow him to play with scissors.
Next up from Trump: I want to see Obama's car insurance policy! not the card, but the long form policy!
I doubt Donald has any friends or close family members, so like any good psychopath, he keeps pictures (in the background) of his victims (i.e "investors").
Or 'his people' just leave the photos that come in the frames in there.
Apologies if retweeting is inappropriate, but anybody who missed this really needs to see it and make it go viral:
This guy has a terrific response to Trump: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vX5ueEKsSWc
(Originally posted by imissopus.)
It's been boingboinged and Reddittttted. It's viral, all right. Still, definitely worth promoting.
Gerald McBoingboing?I'm an oldz. So Tweet is as far as I've gotten into the social net. I refuse to do Facebook and I'm not sure what Reddittttttt or Boingboing is (unless Boingboing is that damn service I signed up for to get internet in an airport a couple years ago, which I promptly deleted after discovering they were trying to bill me monthly.
That'd be boingboing.net, a group blog for techno-slacker-hippie nerds. Emphasis on science fiction, tech, some politics (especially civil liberties and copyright / censorship stuff), and general silliness. Baratunde's video is at http://www.boingboing.net/2011/04/27/baratunde-on...
Free for nothing, and Librul-friendly.
What happened between 3/21 and 4/28 to build Trump's interest in scissoring? Did he finally discover that there's porn on the computer machine?
I'm looking forward to the night of his acceptance speech at the 2012 Republican convention. Before the applause and cheers have died away, he will wave to the crowd and remove that ridiculous "Donald Trump" rubber mask, revealing a smiling Andy Kaufman, visibly aged but still easily recognizable. Without any word of explanation, a cheap record player will rise from a trapdoor next to the podium and Andy will perform a shortened version of his "Mighty Mouse Song" routine, and then a few bars of "Hunka Hunka Burnin' Love." Finally, he will use magician's flash powder to "disappear" from the stage, and will again vanish from public life for years, leaving us to ponder what wacky stunt he'll pull next.
Do you think Donald will be disappointed when he gets to his first debate and none of the questions are about insurance commercials?
Geckos are from Hawaii, at least that what all their birth certificates say.
stick a Werthers original or ten in that ass-lipped mouth of yours and shut up, old man Donald.
*small voice*
I like Werther's.
Thumbs downing troll alert–I see some zeroes up there. What on earth has brought the trolls out in such numbers?
I have people working on this and you are going to be surprised at what they are finding! They are finding AMAZING things… I mean they are amazing… these things… you know… the findings.
D'oh! How did this not occur to me before? The downfister has got to be Trump himself. No one else on earth is as capable of such sheer pettiness.
A couple of weeks ago on the Breitbart they loved loved The Donald. Otherwise it's just one of his interns. Gary?
"What on earth has brought the trolls out in such numbers? "
Now that they can't post WHEREZ THA BIRF CERFITICKET?, they're stuck for anything to say or do until they get their next talking point handed to them.
What a cruel, cruel thing to do to Flo.
Yep, they're cornering the Dark Side over in GA.
Lizards? Reptilians getting married this weekend? Funny looking thing on Trump's head?
CONNECT THE DOTS, SHEEPLE!!!!1!!!
This is good news for David Icke!
lol >Can the birthers now go back to being old, jobless cat hoarders?
I got po'd at the tiny weinie downfister so I followed him/her/it home to that Breitbart rag and found the above. Anyone here responsible for that? I gave whoever it was a thumb's up – not that it matters, since the comment was a -134. lol
Actually, I think we're up to 135. I got some pretty sweet footage of the "dust-ball" as it passed by.
EDIT: And no, they won't treat anyone better.
I think I might remember her, but sometimes all of Angel's pouting kind of made the episodes run together. You're undead, you're unnaturally strong and fast and ridiculously lucky — quit looking constipated all the time. Blood isn't THAT binding, is it?
I'll have to check with my resident Angel expert and see if he remembers it. I knew there was a reason I kept an 11 year-old around.
Quit chuckin my wood!
So easy, even a birther can do it!
President David Palmer, we salute you. As you probably know, the actor took a smidgen of credit when U.S. America elected a black prez for realz.
We just might be better off if we stopped celebrating Stupid.
Our entire stupid-based economy would collapse!
Is that THREE pair of scissors behind him next to the "World's Biggest Blowhard" Coffee Mug? Talk about excess! Oh well, I guess he can afford them.
Trump's wig is growing at such an alarming rate that he must keep TWO pairs of scissors within arms reach at all times.
it's on over and over and over again.</l>
My television set has a button that I can use to change the channel and another one I can use to turn it off. Trump should look into that technology–it might make his life less filled with fear and anger.
I agree with everything Trumpette is saying, except change "Geico ad" to "Donald Trump talking".
WHERE'S THE LIZARD CERTIFICATE SHEEPLE
Somewhere there is an Ali G tape of an interview with The Donald. Worth looking at.
And on top of everything else, isn't the guy doing Rod Serling, not Bogart?
Flo would never sully herself by hanging around with a short-fingered vulgarian! She's a classy lady.
"New Hampshire is an amazing state."
…is Trump in the same universe as the rest of us?
Interesting use of Bob's your uncle there . . .
all things considered, i would rather have more royal wedding coverage.
I find it interesting that men are attracted to women who speak to them as if they are waitresses addressing small children.
Where are all the people who opined that Hurricane Katrina was God's message to the immoral citizens of New Orleans?
We're all being punk'd…
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