CHAIRMAN TRUMP OF CHINA  3:41 pm April 27, 2011

Donald Trump’s Crappy ‘Men’s Fashion’ Line Made In China, Of Course

by Ken Layne

Cretin.Did you know Donald “The Dildo” Trump also has a line of crappy men’s accessories? Apparently true! And you would never ever see such things in real life unless you worked in accounting at some used car dealership in Ocean City, Maryland. But, if for some reason you know one of those CostCo shoppers who legitimately “looks up” to Donald Trump and buys those snake-oil books that never seem to mention how Trump was born rich and still repeatedly went bankrupt and has the morals of an alley cat with none of the charm, then you will want to email this person’s AOL account and let them know that Donald Trump’s crappy neckties and etc. are all made in Communist China.

Donald Trump is so easily and constantly proven to be an actual bag of bullshit wearing an orange wig, we have a hard time thinking he’s not in on the whole joke. Maybe it’s really Andy Kaufman inside that bag of bullshit? Donald Trump claims he’s going to DESTROY China’s manufacturing industry somehow when he magically becomes president of a reality show, and of course he manufactures crap in China to sell to deluded Americans. Donald Trump claims he’s running against an evil African, when Donald is running for nothing and in fact was a vocal supporter of Barack Obama’s campaign and has pathetically been begging to build a free $100 million castle for Barack Obama and also pathetically begging to be made the “oil spill czar” or something, not even a year ago. Donald Trump says he’s going to help the birther conspiracists with their racist Internet war, and then he actually destroys the whole birther movement in what, two weeks? That stuff could’ve gone on for another six years. (Instead, the birthers are now forced to make up far less convincing reasons why a nigra can’t be president, such as “Harvard.”)

But about these Donald Trump brand apparel items:

Donald Trump has emerged in recent years as the nation’s foremost China basher, going after the Asian superpower for undervaluing its currency and for taking American manufacturing and jobs. So it’s at least ironic — and at most an example of gross hypocrisy — that Trump’s own line of men’s wear, the Donald J. Trump Signature Collection, is manufactured in China.

Of course, not all this Jersey Shore: Boardroom mass-market Trump garbage is made in China. The rest is made in Mexico, by illegal aliens, and Bangladesh, by secret Muslims. [Salon War Room]

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 137 comments }

nounverb911 April 27, 2011 at 3:45 pm

The ILGWU does not approve!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Lg4gGk53iY

Gratuitous World April 27, 2011 at 3:45 pm

hey asshats – Who's the Manchurian Candidate now?!

JustPixelz April 27, 2011 at 4:04 pm

I kinda feel sorry for China if Trumpette is the best Manchurian candidate they can field.

Dui bu qi. Forgive us China. The shame is ours for thinking of him as our own.

ifthethunderdontgetya April 27, 2011 at 4:27 pm

1) Don't mock my man, Manchu!

2) Think Members Only jacket. But even cooler!
~

memzilla April 27, 2011 at 3:46 pm

C'mon Donald, get busy! This bag of hand-selected lightly salted poison rat dicks isn't going to eat itself, you know!

Barb April 27, 2011 at 3:46 pm

Donald Trump has communist ties? Hear that, Birthers?

JustPixelz April 27, 2011 at 4:05 pm

He sells communist ties. Big difference.

phlox✔ April 27, 2011 at 4:20 pm

I'm slightly embarrassed to admit this, but that means I have communist ties.

Barb April 27, 2011 at 4:45 pm

I forgive you Phlox and thanks for understanding the joke!

babyeinstein April 27, 2011 at 6:57 pm

the only ones who can hear you are the ones whose chubby little fingers AREN'T jammed into the ears (they fell off, from the diabeetus).

crybabyboehner April 27, 2011 at 3:47 pm

The Trump label is your assurance of quality apparel.

SenileAgitation April 27, 2011 at 4:03 pm

I had occasion not so long ago to look snappy, and a Trump Collection red (Maoist) tie (it quietly SCREAMS power in excess) was just the finishing touch. Chinese moths make silk, ties are silk, Chinese moths are snappy dressers. Now I feel bad, because back then, The Donald was just an unsavory jerkoff, not a freedom felching political opportunist bent on undermining our President during two wars, praise Him. So fine, I'll burn the tie. But I'm keeping the nifty Members Only jacket no matter what you think. Chams De Baron, look out!

Extemporanus April 27, 2011 at 4:04 pm

"If it doesn't have a long-form label, it isn't a Donald J. Trump Signature Collection top quality piece of classy friggin' Oriental-crafted apparel."

DaRooster April 27, 2011 at 4:21 pm

"The Trump label is your assurance of quality… appalling."
There we go…

Dudleydidwrong April 27, 2011 at 11:31 pm

The Trump label Libel is your assurance of quality shit.

UpFistTroll April 27, 2011 at 3:48 pm

I don't think any comment could possibly improve on that perfect post. I see SOMEBODY'S been bathing in Metamucil and printers' ink!

Monsieur_Grumpe April 27, 2011 at 3:48 pm

Trump is Andy Kaufman? This would explain much. I can see it now. Right before Trump is sworn in he breaks out in a killer impersonation of Elvis.

genxr April 27, 2011 at 3:51 pm

Hey, Trump! Mighty Mouse or GTFO.

Jerri April 27, 2011 at 3:56 pm

Trump will surveeeve!

SorosBot April 27, 2011 at 4:37 pm

It would be nice to see Trump get seriously injured by a pro wrestler, although only if it was actually real.

OC_Surf_Serf April 27, 2011 at 3:48 pm

Kathy Lee Gifford on line 1, Sam Walton's corpse on line 2.

nounverb911 April 27, 2011 at 3:51 pm

Needs more sweatshops.

chascates April 27, 2011 at 3:49 pm

SHOW US YOUR SCALP!

DaRooster April 27, 2011 at 4:21 pm

And its death certificate.

nounverb911 April 27, 2011 at 3:50 pm

"Maybe it’s really Andy Kaufman inside that bag of shit? "
Not Andy, Andy would have mud wrestled Sarah Palin on live TV.

Grief_Lessons April 27, 2011 at 4:00 pm

Just you wait…

genxr April 27, 2011 at 4:15 pm

Speaking of which, when is the first debate?

SayItWithWookies April 27, 2011 at 3:51 pm

The Donald isn't responsible for having his crap cranked out in China — Pastor Todd makes all of his business decisions.

WordSaladNation April 27, 2011 at 3:52 pm

Somehow, this all reminds me of the old Bloom County series of gags in which Donald Trump's brain is transplanted into Bill the Cat's body! Ack!

BaldarTFlagass April 27, 2011 at 3:52 pm

Actually, Donald Trump was kidnapped several months ago, and the guy we have been most recently exposed to is actually an impersonator, hired and scripted by the Yes-Men. It's the only explanation.

DaRooster April 27, 2011 at 4:23 pm

I think its Santorum… he kinda wafted away lately.

Extemporanus April 27, 2011 at 3:52 pm

"I have a great business relationship with the yellows."

- Donald Trump

nounverb911 April 27, 2011 at 3:55 pm

"They starch my shirts and shorts nicely".

Extemporanus April 27, 2011 at 4:10 pm

In retrospect, I think the quote actually should've been:

"I have a great business relationship with the Orientals."

I'm confident, however, that the "yellow"-related wordplay that follows will make up for my error.

nounverb911 April 27, 2011 at 3:58 pm

"I run yellow lights all the time".

RedneckMuslin April 27, 2011 at 4:04 pm

"They call me 'mellow yellow'"

Ruhe April 27, 2011 at 4:08 pm

Ancient Chinese secret, huh?

Poindexter718 April 27, 2011 at 3:52 pm

In the event anybody out there doesn't mind a bit of mercury poisoning from their haberdashery and wants to dress like the cast of Barney Miller: http://www1.macys.com/shop/mens/featured-brands/d

MMathS April 27, 2011 at 4:34 pm

You show me a pair of cuff links that look snappy AND give my child developmental disabilities and I'll be the first guy in line.

'Til then, buzz off, liburul.

__kth__ April 27, 2011 at 5:19 pm

well the blue shirt with the white tab collar was there, just like I pictured it. But I can't find the pinky rings!

baconzgood April 27, 2011 at 3:53 pm

MAN! Don's downward spiral is worse than Sarah's. It looks like Don's little bubble that he's built in his mind is starting to implode. Mr. T. Baconz got some advice fer ya: You are a two bit con-man with a shady past. If you want to throw your hat into the ring of body politic you have to be at least an eight bit con-man with a past that must be hidden at all costs.

These dudes aren't some interns fresh out of NYU. These douche bags play for keeps.

BaldarTFlagass April 27, 2011 at 3:58 pm

"Don's downward spiral is worse than Sarah's."
Nah, I think they're about the same, it's just that Trump's spiral is a lot tighter; i.e. Sarah's is Archimedean/arithmetic, Donald's is Bernoullian/logarithmic.

Lionel[redacted]Esq April 27, 2011 at 4:11 pm

What you are missing is that his "downward spiral" in fact means that he is the perfect candidate in the eyes of 'baggers. Hell, is Sister Sarah really wants to run, she needs to bring the crazy, and not just rely on some intern posting tweets for her.

Extemporanus April 27, 2011 at 4:22 pm

And the Republican presidential field as a whole is a Mandelbrot set scrawled by a crayon-eating retarded racist eight-year-old.

baconzgood April 27, 2011 at 4:27 pm

You so smart I betch you know who Mandelbrot was.

BZ1 April 27, 2011 at 3:53 pm

Is that what he meant when the Donald said he deals with the Chinese? He sourced out the cheapest way to make his cr**py suits?!

JustPixelz April 27, 2011 at 4:16 pm

We can't say "crappy" on wonkette anymore?!? Shit. Can we still say "trumpy" instead?

Jukesgrrl April 27, 2011 at 5:22 pm

Turmp. The word kinda LOOKS like a pile of shit. Even Jack's typos are creative.

Gopherit April 27, 2011 at 3:54 pm

Donald the Dildo? So, you're telling me thats a merkin on his head? Because that would actually make sense.

elviouslyqueer April 27, 2011 at 3:54 pm

Oh c'mon Ken, you can't make zillions of dollars without exploiting at least a little of that sweet, sweet slave commie sweatshop labor.

GOPCrusher April 27, 2011 at 5:14 pm

I'm Kathy Lee Gifford, and I approve of this message.

ManchuCandidate April 27, 2011 at 3:55 pm

Hypocrisy is the Trump "brand" anyway.

Who else would peddle a course on how to get rich to rubes? It's much easier to be born into a wealthy family like Trump was than getting a great idea putting all the effort/agony/hard work/begging for capital then making a fortune.

Beowoof April 27, 2011 at 3:55 pm

I have always passed when I have seen the Trump label figuring it was probably cheaply made and in no way would I ever support a cheap huckster. And this was before the birther bullshit. Now, I wouldn't use his clothing to shine my shoes.

BZ1 April 27, 2011 at 3:55 pm

Downfister troll, reveal thyself, Wonketters want to comment on your website…

Redhead April 27, 2011 at 3:56 pm

He's ALMOST as hypocritical and ignorant as the teabaggers! Not quite there, but certainly getting closer. He's a lock for the Repugnicant nomination (and another year of laughs), for sure!

Jukesgrrl April 27, 2011 at 5:24 pm

I think he's worse. They have to wait on the Koch Brothers for funding. He's got NBC at his disposal.

EdFlintstone April 27, 2011 at 3:58 pm

Trump to the American worker—–You're Fired!

nounverb911 April 27, 2011 at 4:00 pm

NBC to Trump (hopefully): You're Fired!

Ruhe April 27, 2011 at 4:00 pm

"Maybe it’s really Andy Kaufman inside that bag of shit?" Haha! The Donald is secretly the libtard version of Francisco d'Anconia, a crypto-commie industrialist mole, destroying the Republican movement from the inside.

Rosie_Scenario April 27, 2011 at 4:00 pm

Trump's "Vulgarian" line of Men's accessories: The gloves have extra short fingers.

DahBoner April 27, 2011 at 11:05 pm

I prefer Michael Jackson's line of sequined fingerless gloves. Very handy for digging through dumpsters, while being quite elegant…

DaRooster April 27, 2011 at 4:01 pm

Hey folks, c'mon… Trump doesn't have the time or enough gumshoes to track where the stuff for his own companies is produced. He has far too much wrapped up in birth certificate research and ballroom design… Leave Donald Alone!

aguacatero April 27, 2011 at 4:01 pm

Donald "J." Trump, huh?

Jackoff? Jackblack? Jaime? Jerkwad? Jellohair? Johnson?

Update: The Google says "John." Also apt.

memzilla April 27, 2011 at 4:02 pm

You know, the laws of probability indicate that Donald Segretti, Karl Rove, and Lee Atwater might have good Doppelgangers, and they're working for the Dems. Or so we can hope.

I will console myself with the image of Molly Ivins in Heaven, doing a spit-take of fine bourbon, snorting, as she laughs at the Republicans' continuing outing of themselves. Bless their hearts.

littlebigdaddy April 27, 2011 at 4:02 pm

I would just like to point out that trump is a regional British slang term for fart. Thank you.

emmelemm April 27, 2011 at 5:52 pm

The more you know! {shooting star, chime sounds}

Warpde April 27, 2011 at 4:02 pm

"The rest is made in Mexico, by illegal aliens,"__My gawd. illegal m'erican workers are taking away the jobs in Mexico from Mexican's? How is Brewer going to take this?

donner_froh April 27, 2011 at 4:02 pm

Let's hear it for all the charming, amoral alley cats. They eat dead animals while Donald Trump wears one on his head.

anniegetyerfun April 27, 2011 at 4:25 pm

I would argue that most alley cats' matted pelts are better-looking than Donald's.

emmelemm April 27, 2011 at 5:49 pm

Plus, their yowling all night long is still less annoying to listen to than D. Trump talking. (Bloviating, that is.)

Grief_Lessons April 27, 2011 at 4:02 pm

Andy Kaufman, playing the long con. Suddenly everything makes sense.

GOPCrusher April 27, 2011 at 5:17 pm

About time to put an end to it. Most people don't have an idea of who he is anymore.

Worthly[♬♪♬♪♫♪♬]Skum April 27, 2011 at 4:02 pm

Iraq war.
Abu Gharib.
Habeus corpus.
Guantanemo.
Katrina.
Economic collapse.
"Gay marriage is more a threat to this nation than al-Qaeda."
"Reagan proved that deficits don't matter."
"Conservation is, at best, a person virtue."
"So long the from the world's biggest polluter."

Better now?

babyeinstein April 27, 2011 at 6:56 pm

whew, thanks for that. my head was starting to stop spinning around like linda blair in whatsit, "the excrementist."

SorosBot April 27, 2011 at 4:03 pm

Well Donald must really be happy that he's succeed in getting all the extra attention he wanted. Maybe there is such a thing as bad publicity.

emmelemm April 27, 2011 at 4:05 pm

Honestly, this IS getting out of hand. Trump is either *supremely* punking us all, or he really is the most deluded person on the face of the Earth (genuine possibility)!

He doesn't seem to realize that things he may have said or done in the past are, in fact, preserved for posterity on videotape, printed materials, or even just in electrons. Also, that there's such a thing as public records, and every last one of his dealings is going to be scrutinized, and they're not going to hold up to scrutiny.

It's madness, I tells ya, madness!

jus_wonderin April 27, 2011 at 4:06 pm

Now how did I know this would be how Donald would operate. Wonkette, your truths are killing my soul.

Gopherit April 27, 2011 at 4:09 pm

slightly OT, but that picture looks like the starting point of his strategy to get OPEC to lower their oil prices. Jesus, slow down, big boy. Even Dubya held hands first.

elviouslyqueer April 27, 2011 at 4:09 pm

Um, Barry, it's time to rendition this utterly insane shitbag. Like, NOW.

Oldskool_ April 27, 2011 at 4:11 pm

If his orange face paint is also from China, that would esplain a lot.

RedneckMuslin April 27, 2011 at 4:13 pm

Boner is from China?!!!!

Chillwaver April 27, 2011 at 4:12 pm

I wonder if the wombat is genuinely Aussie or just another Chinese knockoff…

timbo71351 April 27, 2011 at 4:13 pm

The worst part is that it turns out that thing sitting on top of his head was also made in China. Oh, the hypocrisy!

Quayle2012_KNOT April 27, 2011 at 4:14 pm

You people have no class. Donald Trump was a standout student at an excellent, excellent college. And if you've been following his leading role in international affairs (e.g., fleecing Quaddafi on a real estate deal), you'd know he's got some secret plan to screw the Chinese and reverse our terrible, terrible trade deficit. You may have failed to notice Mr. Trump's highly distinguished taste in exceedingly brash, monochromatic ties, but believe me, they scare the hell out of the Democrat Party! Donald Trump: Live Like Him!!

genxr April 27, 2011 at 4:18 pm

Step 1: Offer to build the grandest ballroom in China…
Step 2: ?
Step 3: Bankruptcy! (and profit)

genxr April 27, 2011 at 4:19 pm

I like how your handle endorses adding Don Knotts to the Quayle ticket. That's just the sort of out-of-the-box thinking we need!

102415 April 27, 2011 at 8:02 pm

Live like him? I can't afford to borrow money from those people. The vig would finish me. Still I like your style. Upfist.

DemonicRage April 27, 2011 at 4:14 pm

Go on http://www.Macy's.com to view his shirts and ties. He prolly has suits as well. Who would have guessed that, when he isn't dispatching his flying monkeys to investigate things, he sits in an atelier, channeling Yves St. Laurent, designing things!

Lionel[redacted]Esq April 27, 2011 at 4:14 pm

Questionable Birth Certificate? Check.

Strong ties with China and the Communist? Check.

Isn't it great that the GOP's and 'bagger's great white hope is in fact more like the Obama they fear than Obama could ever be. Plus none of the morals or family values. I guess being a racist wins over being a hypocrit.

GOPCrusher April 27, 2011 at 5:20 pm

Well, you know who else had strong ties to Communist China?

SorosBot April 27, 2011 at 5:21 pm

Richard Nixon?

donner_froh April 27, 2011 at 4:18 pm

The difference between business journalism (sic) and political reporting:

Business journalist: Mr. Trump can I suck your cock, just for a moment, please, sir?

Political reporter: Mr. Trump since you are running for President I plan to uncover every scandal, inconsistency and outright lie. Starting now.

Ha Ha–Fuck you very much, Trump. This is going to be a good ride.

anniegetyerfun April 27, 2011 at 4:30 pm

Haha, the political reporter is too busy sucking Pentagon/DoD/White House cock to uncover anything. Just in general.

Weenus299 April 27, 2011 at 4:19 pm

Donald Trump is so 80s. Why is he even on the Wonkett? Put Rubik's Cube on here, or Don Johnson and his vomit bad sockless-shirtless pastel suit getups. Cocaine. Michael Jackson, Ronald Reagan, mall bangs. Spare me this nostalgia crap!

bumfug April 27, 2011 at 4:22 pm

I'll have you know that Trump ties are worn by accountants at the finest used car lots in Rehoboth Beach!

Barb April 27, 2011 at 4:49 pm

Love Rehoboth Beach!

Bum, Donald REALLY likes to be in the white hot spotlight. What do you think Jay, Conan, Craig, Dave, Jon, Colbert, et al. are gonna be talking about tonight?

bumfug April 27, 2011 at 6:11 pm

Dave, I'm sure, will be talking about "that thing on his head" like always and Jay will have some obvious one-liners his writers found in the comments on Wonkette. Unless Trump is on the show, in that case Jay will be slurping at his butt.

Barb April 27, 2011 at 6:38 pm

Colbert will do it justice!

bumfug April 27, 2011 at 6:50 pm

As will Stewart. An old friend of mine who's here in L.A. now was a writer for the Daily Show in 2000 when I went to NYC to be on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire. He got me a couple of last minute seats at the show and I was even more impressed with John Stewart than I had been previously. Super intelligent and a really nice guy.

CapeClod April 27, 2011 at 4:23 pm

Its CPAC's fault for making him a speaker at their annual circle jerk. As soon as he saw all the low foreheads hanging on his every word, he knew there was an opportunity to exploit to his advantage.

CrunchyKnee April 27, 2011 at 4:26 pm

The invisible hand needs to slap the rug off that douche bag's head.

Worthly[♬♪♬♪♫♪♬]Skum April 27, 2011 at 4:30 pm

You know, Trump looks a bit like a melted wax figurine of Robert Redford, at least from a distance, if you squint and stab shrimp forks into your eyes.

Fox n Fiends April 27, 2011 at 4:31 pm

Donald Trump is the new Ronald Reagan.
There is no daylight between them.

Poor_Mr.Corsi_lol April 27, 2011 at 4:47 pm

So they both want to raise taxes, deal with our enemies, cut and run after attacks, raise the deficit, raise the debt, increase government, and negotiate with terrorists. SWEET !!

Fox n Fiends April 27, 2011 at 4:52 pm

They both will say anything that they're told to say.

Poor_Mr.Corsi_lol April 27, 2011 at 5:02 pm

But one thinks he is a leader of men and the other thought he was a garden shrub.

anniegetyerfun April 27, 2011 at 4:32 pm

I can at least take comfort in the fact that Trump, like all men with huge egos, goes home every night, gets dressed in pink lingerie, and has his mistress flog him with chains while he sucks his thumb and pees all over himself.

Oh, wait, did I say "comfort"? I meant, "someone please kill me".

Gopherit April 27, 2011 at 4:34 pm

That's something that's going to stick with you right there.

GOPCrusher April 27, 2011 at 5:26 pm

At least you didn't include a toilet seat around his neck, because that would just be creepy.

anniegetyerfun April 27, 2011 at 5:28 pm

Yeah, I was really being as subtle as I could.

Gopherit April 27, 2011 at 4:33 pm

He really is more like a fratboy's flesh light. Looks more useful than it is, is crusty and disgusting inside, and has fucked up hair on it.

SorosBot April 27, 2011 at 4:34 pm

I'm not sorry at all, just reveling in schadenfreude and laughing.

__kth__ April 27, 2011 at 4:45 pm

Donald Trump seemed to believe that, despite all the don't-tread-on-me national greatness blather coming from the teatards and their defenders, they're really all about hating the swarthies and cheap fuel for their RVs now and forever amen.

Pardon me, just now I seem to have forgotten why I don't like this guy.

Poor_Mr.Corsi_lol April 27, 2011 at 4:46 pm

Is anyone surprised by this ? America last according to Trump

SudsMcKenzie April 27, 2011 at 5:13 pm

You don't even want to know where "Trump Ice" comes from.

thefrontpage April 27, 2011 at 5:24 pm

Every time you wear a Trump Apparel Jacket, and take it off, you want to wear it again an hour later.

thefrontpage April 27, 2011 at 5:25 pm

Instead of those "Inspected by…" pieces of paper, inside Trump Apparel clothes, there are little fortune cookie predictions.

user-of-owls April 27, 2011 at 5:32 pm

Wait, the Donald J. Trump Signature Collection? I didn't know that illiterates even had signatures?

WinterOuthouse April 27, 2011 at 5:46 pm

I heard his hair was manufactured in Kenya

hagajim April 27, 2011 at 6:11 pm

Trump….rhymes with dump, which I am going to take in 3…2…1.

snoopyfan2010 April 27, 2011 at 8:01 pm

And this only proves that some flags wave in whatever direction the wind blows.

4TheTurnstiles April 27, 2011 at 8:54 pm

And Lou Sarah hasn't even *launched* her "Moose Knuckle" line of mom jeans yet…

Sharkey April 27, 2011 at 9:59 pm

"Donald Trump Kaufman in a wrestling match, yeah yeah, yeah yeah."

Sharkey April 27, 2011 at 10:01 pm

I take offense to this article. Donald Trump has both the morals and charm of an alley cat.

jane_cerva April 27, 2011 at 10:24 pm

But does he have hair care products in the line?

ttommyunger April 27, 2011 at 10:54 pm

Sadly, I can top that: I got out of the Army before they started wearing a completely non-fuctional piece French Headgear (also) made in fucking China, believe it or not.

DahBoner April 27, 2011 at 10:59 pm

Does Trump make sweaters with extra-large neck holes for guys with unusually large heads?

MiniMencken April 28, 2011 at 4:27 am

And when will the Trumper demand the public see that scandalous video taken by Todd Palin of Sarah and Bristol administering a punishment enema of Alaskan ice water to Piper? Enquiring minds want to know!

NorthStarSpanx April 28, 2011 at 8:50 am

A free call and free admittance to anything Donald Trump still costs too much.

horsedreamer_1 April 28, 2011 at 9:30 am

Quiet, now. If we do that, Ken will end up having to deal with Hal Sparks & Andrew "Dice" Clay squatting on the Wonkette Ranch.

horsedreamer_1 April 28, 2011 at 9:32 am

Trump's doing this so he can catch the Chinamen off their guard. Make nice, make nice, make nice — then, boom, air-strikes.

Barb April 27, 2011 at 6:57 pm

Who do what?

Barb April 27, 2011 at 8:35 pm

Bum, Letterman does get old with that crap, doesn't he? I attended a taping of his show and someone brought a bust of Bill Clinton, made of french fries. During the break they passed it around. I was horrified when it landed in my lap. The camera came back on and Letterman asks me, "Ma'am, would you like some ketchup with that?" and I hollered up to him, "Nah, ketchup is the condiment of the damned" The minute it came out of my mouth I was like "wtf did I just say?" and somehow, people thought it was funny, go figure.

NorthStarSpanx April 28, 2011 at 8:53 am

TMI bumfug (and Barb) now the trolls will set in on you like white on rice (not on brown rice, that's too ethnic.)

I find you all terribly interesting however. Can I stalk you?

horsedreamer_1 April 28, 2011 at 9:33 am

But, we have to know: did the French Fry Clinton float?

bumfug April 29, 2011 at 1:43 am

Oooo. I'm terrified. I've always said what I think and in the old days it was on stage, using my own name. If it's too scary to speak your own mind under your own name in America these days then fuck America. My name is Rudy Reber and if they want to put me on a no-fly list, I'll take the fucking train.

NorthStarSpanx April 29, 2011 at 10:59 am

You mean we are fucking posting against the wit of professional comedians on this site? I quit.

Sorry about you not becoming a Millionaire. The better way to do it these days seems to be by being picked from obscurity to become a political stone-thrower with nothing to back it up, or getting pregnant before graduating high school and advocating abstinence.

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