WHAT? OH OKAY  12:05 pm April 26, 2011

Fox News Warns America About Sinister ‘Gay Pressure’

by Riley Waggaman

Worthy of at least 1,000 PulitzersExcuse our youthful curiosity, Fox Nation, but what is this delicious-sounding Gay Pressure which you speak of? Is it similar to peer pressure, just with tons more “penis”? Maybe! Or maybe it is an ancient Chinese Homo-Puncture technique that relieves “back” problems? Please help us solve this gay mystery in the comments section!

Haha, and look! This news article originally appeared in the commie New York Times, under the headline, “Law Firm Won’t Defend Marriage Act.” No mention of America Under Gay Pressure? Good gravy. Predictable liberals with their misleading headlines.

♫This is our last dance ♫
♫ This is ourselves ♫
♫Under Gay Pressure ♫
♫ dum dum dum dee dee dum dum ♫

Thank you to Wonkette operative “Luke” for this weird Fox News headline! [Fox Nation]

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 194 comments }

jjdaddyo April 26, 2011 at 12:08 pm

Isn't "Gay Pressure" what makes the prostate feel so good?

Moonbat April 26, 2011 at 1:45 pm

I thought that was Chuck Mangione?

simplyblue7 April 26, 2011 at 12:08 pm

If I'm not mistaken…Gay Pressure is called Topping.

freakishlywrong April 26, 2011 at 12:12 pm

Then I wish the fucking spineless Dems would take a few lessons in topping.

Doktor Zoom April 26, 2011 at 12:15 pm

It's also a floor wax.

Oblios_Cap April 26, 2011 at 12:08 pm

Gay pressure has contributed to many happy endings, or so I'm told…

BaldarTFlagass April 26, 2011 at 12:09 pm

Needs more tongue-punching of fartboxes.

ttommyunger April 26, 2011 at 1:20 pm

How wude!

bagofmice April 26, 2011 at 1:57 pm

It's Twue!

RedneckMuslin April 26, 2011 at 12:09 pm

It means some GOP pols take a wide stance on this issue. Some are bending over for this.

slithytoves April 26, 2011 at 12:10 pm

Gawd, the comments attached to that article made my eyes burn. Somebody get me some porn.

Sophist [غني عن ذلك] April 26, 2011 at 12:13 pm

Some…gay porn, perchance?

BaldarTFlagass April 26, 2011 at 12:20 pm

Not trying to force anything on you, or something, but…

Doktor Zoom April 26, 2011 at 12:22 pm

They're just trying to force this down our throats….hhmmmpphhh, kaff! Mmmmm…Oh, god, yes…

baconzgood April 26, 2011 at 12:46 pm

Are we going to swollow this?

widestanceroman April 26, 2011 at 12:56 pm

A spitter's a quitter.

ttommyunger April 26, 2011 at 1:22 pm

pornhub.com always works for me.

Schmannnity April 26, 2011 at 12:11 pm

Very suspicious that Fox is repeating a story from MSM New York Times. There must be a gay fox in the henhouse.

CapeClod April 26, 2011 at 12:32 pm

My money is on Shepard Smith or Steve Douchy.

Sophist [غني عن ذلك] April 26, 2011 at 12:36 pm

I'm pretty sure Steve Doocys reproduce asexually.

trondant April 26, 2011 at 1:17 pm

Truly a fungus among us.

jaytingle April 26, 2011 at 12:41 pm

There's little doubt about the Gay Pressure that drives Shep Smith. Coincidentally, Rachel Maddow just broadcast a thinly veiled appeal for a closeted news anchor to come out.

chicken_thief April 26, 2011 at 1:02 pm

Quit pickin' on Anderson, Bully-Maddow!!!

Doktor Zoom April 26, 2011 at 1:16 pm

Rachel Maddow is the epitome of a gay fox.

horsedreamer_1 April 26, 2011 at 1:19 pm

Zwing!

ttommyunger April 26, 2011 at 1:24 pm

All those hard peckers among them chickens sure has to be a turn-on for the "Deuce".

V572..whatever April 26, 2011 at 1:56 pm

She makes me feel like a lesbian trapped in a man's body.

[some other commenter said that here first years ago, and I would credit him if I could remember who it was]

Negropolis April 27, 2011 at 12:33 am

There definitely isn't any cock in the henhouse.

memzilla April 26, 2011 at 12:11 pm

Riley, didn't you post a pic of you and Andrew Breitfart that had something to do with "Gay Pressure?"

KenLayIsAlive April 26, 2011 at 12:29 pm

Brietbart's gay pressure is strong enough to make whore diamonds.

Serolf_Divad April 26, 2011 at 12:11 pm

Via Wikipedia:

Pressure: is an effect which occurs when a force is applied on a surface. Pressure is the amount of force acting on a unit area. The symbol of pressure is P.

Formula: P= F/A or P =dFn/dA

Gay Pressure: is an effect which occurs when a force is applied on a surface with a hot, swollen, turgid, sweaty, erect penis.

JustPixelz April 26, 2011 at 12:21 pm

Next you'll be claiming the Theory of Relativity explains where TP'ers come from.

Sophist [غني عن ذلك] April 26, 2011 at 12:39 pm

No, the Theory of Relativity explains the British monarchy. TP'ers are mostly an object lesson on why you shouldn't use lead-based paint on cribs.

Boojum_Reborn April 26, 2011 at 12:55 pm

Do penises even have sweat glands?

ttommyunger April 26, 2011 at 1:25 pm

Relative Humidity: when sweat drips off your sack onto your sister-in-law's taint. You're welcome!

tessiee April 27, 2011 at 1:23 pm

This is clearly discrimination of some sort.
As a straight woman, I demand my fair share of hot, swollen, turgid, erect penis.

WinterOuthouse April 26, 2011 at 12:11 pm

Needs moar santorum

Swampgas_Man April 26, 2011 at 3:31 pm

And Fluid Sexuality. Pretty sure that means water sports.

Gopherit April 26, 2011 at 12:12 pm

That damn gay pressure again. How can the fox personalities take it? All of those pictures and videos out there on the internet…..just calling. It's more than Beck and Hannity can take, godblessem.

Barb April 26, 2011 at 12:12 pm

What the hell is "gay pressure?" Is it cause by Lezbeans?

widestanceroman April 26, 2011 at 12:21 pm

Taking Peen-O will help with that.

Sophist [غني عن ذلك] April 26, 2011 at 12:30 pm

Otherwise you'll suffer from chronic fabulence.

elviouslyqueer April 26, 2011 at 12:33 pm

You three bitches owe me a new keyboard and monitor.

Barb April 26, 2011 at 12:38 pm

Sorry Elvis, we love you!

Doktor Zoom April 26, 2011 at 12:51 pm

I hear that Fox is looking to hire a LISP programmer

ttommyunger April 26, 2011 at 1:27 pm

I sointainly hope so!

V572..whatever April 26, 2011 at 1:58 pm

Oh so many upfists for that one, would that it were possible.

EatsBabyDingos April 26, 2011 at 12:13 pm

"Under Gay Pressure," the song by Bowie NOT plagiarized by Chuckie N and Vanilla Ice.

bagofmice April 26, 2011 at 2:06 pm

I was thinking about how about how adding a syllable would ruin the cadence, but it doesn't really. You just have to stress the second syllable of "under" so that you can slip the "gay" in.

"UnDER gay Pressure"…

Lionel[redacted]Esq April 26, 2011 at 12:13 pm

If only my firm had a little gay pressure, at least I would have a social life.

GeneralLerong April 26, 2011 at 12:14 pm

Heh – an Amazon flying-monkey-poop review that persuaded me to immediately buy a Kindle copy of 31 Bond Street:

"This book is advertised on Wonkette, a Web site that ridiculed Sara Palin's down syndrome son. If this book is advertised to devotees of that site, I will not read it."

Now trying to think which relatives and/or friends might enjoy a copy of Larry Flynt's One Nation Under Sex…

finallyhappy April 26, 2011 at 2:25 pm

You don't really think the people who oppose wonkette actually buy books, do you?

tessiee April 27, 2011 at 1:29 pm

"Heh – an Amazon flying-monkey-poop review that persuaded me to immediately buy a Kindle copy of 31 Bond Street"

Oh! Thanks for the reminder!
I'd been meaning to check that out of the library, and when I saw your comment, I put the book on hold.

Oblios_Cap April 26, 2011 at 12:14 pm

Gay Pressure is what causes John Boner to weep. Or, at least, bite the pillow.

Lionel[redacted]Esq April 26, 2011 at 12:14 pm

If Larry Craig had been smart, he would have said he was relieving gay pressure when he was at the air port.

mourningnmerica April 26, 2011 at 3:31 pm

"…air port…" !!!!!!!!!!!!!

tessiee April 27, 2011 at 1:30 pm

air biscuit

SorosBot April 26, 2011 at 12:14 pm

Gay Pressure is what most of the fundamentalist homophobes feel whenever they watch 300 or pro wrestling.

Doktor Zoom April 26, 2011 at 12:23 pm

So Tommy, do you like gladiator movies?

tessiee April 27, 2011 at 1:30 pm

Ever been in a Turkish prison?

Ruhe April 26, 2011 at 12:28 pm

Clearly this guy was feeling the gay pressure.

Doktor Zoom April 26, 2011 at 12:15 pm

I'm going to wait until someone posts a funny comment and then copy it and post it myself.

TsunamiAli April 26, 2011 at 12:34 pm

Plaigerizer!

ttommyunger April 26, 2011 at 1:31 pm

I'm going to wait until someone posts a funny comment and then copy it and post it myself.

hagajim April 26, 2011 at 12:15 pm

Gay pressure…that slightly unconfortable feeling just before your balloon knot pops open!

ogradybt April 26, 2011 at 12:15 pm

I'll just lay this out and let someone else fill in the gaps: Queen is the Obama administration, Bowie is, uh, gay rights groups, and Vanilla Ice is Fox News for stealing the NYT beat and then laming it out.

DashboardBuddha April 26, 2011 at 12:17 pm

That was pretty damn astute!

Sophist [غني عن ذلك] April 26, 2011 at 12:15 pm

I guess the gay Mafia made them a gay offer they couldn't gayfuse.

Gay. Gay. Gaaaaaaaay.

facehead April 26, 2011 at 12:16 pm

"Gaydar" is old-fashioned and unreliable, Gaybarometers are the new hip thing with all the cool young lawyers.

mormos April 26, 2011 at 10:42 pm

gayGPS. it's all digital now.

tessiee April 27, 2011 at 1:33 pm

Gay Twitter?

Doktor Zoom April 26, 2011 at 12:18 pm

The important thing is to make sure that you apply the Firm Gay Pressure of the Law consistently, slowly increasing the tempo, and consulting with your Partners to make sure they are in concurrence. Then, slowly remove their Amicus briefs.

If it Pleasures the Court….

rileywaggs April 26, 2011 at 12:21 pm

MY WORD, WHAT DID I JUST READ???

CalamityJames April 26, 2011 at 12:27 pm

The best damn legal advice I ever heard.

SorosBot April 26, 2011 at 12:28 pm

Hey you finally got the blue stripe like Ken, congrats!

Doktor Zoom April 26, 2011 at 12:30 pm

Riley, I'd take YOUR deposition any time you want.

Gopherit April 26, 2011 at 12:40 pm

I think it's precious that Riley acts like Breitbart didn't try to depose him.

Gopherit April 26, 2011 at 12:34 pm

An excerpt from One Nation Under Sex.

riverside68 April 26, 2011 at 12:27 pm

David is that you? You never called back, I'd love to see you again, even just for 5 minutes, okay 10, oh god make it 15 please?

widestanceroman April 26, 2011 at 12:34 pm

First, we fill all the lawyers.

Doktor Zoom April 26, 2011 at 12:48 pm

with santorum…

bagofmice April 26, 2011 at 2:15 pm

Of course. That comes naturally.

ttommyunger April 26, 2011 at 1:33 pm

Fap, fap, fap, and I'm not even gay…at least I don't think I am…..

Doktor Zoom April 26, 2011 at 1:56 pm

Yeah, neither does Bryan Fissure, so….

ttommyunger April 26, 2011 at 1:59 pm

No, he fucking KNOWS he's gay, he just won't admit it, even to himself.

mormos April 26, 2011 at 10:44 pm

his name is Fissure, I mean COME ON!

bagofmice April 26, 2011 at 2:14 pm

Subpoenas go in, subpoenas go out. Never a miscommunication. How do you explain that?

Doktor Zoom April 26, 2011 at 3:29 pm

I'm pretty sure you meant dompoenas.

tessiee April 27, 2011 at 1:34 pm

When does each side present their oral argument?

EatsBabyDingos April 26, 2011 at 12:18 pm

Reminds me of my great aunts in Cedar Rapids named Gay and Gladys. I was about 12 when Aunt Gay called her sister "Happybottom," which puzzled the hell out of me. I finally asked my mom, and she said it was a variation on Glad-ass, which is a happy bottom. I think of the Gays and Happybottoms of the world often and smile, because I love my Gay, Glad-ass family.

bagofmice April 26, 2011 at 2:17 pm

Speaking of portal games, the kids these days are much more into GLadOS.

emmelemm April 26, 2011 at 2:22 pm

I really, really hope that story is real, because it's possibly the most adorably charming thing I've read this week (possibly month)!

EatsBabyDingos April 26, 2011 at 6:24 pm

It is true! They were twin sisters to my Grandma, Althea, who was affectionately known as Sal for reasons that are mysterious…Thanks for your post!

mourningnmerica April 26, 2011 at 3:36 pm

If you take the name Gladys, and distill the queer out of it, it leaves LDS. Coincidence?

Steverino247 April 26, 2011 at 12:18 pm

While I'm not a fan of homosexuality (any more than I am a fan of any of the billions of possible human genetic outcomes), I do understand that it is a naturally occurring phenomenon and that homosexuals have no more choice about the matter than I did about being heterosexual. Or being tall. Or having those features called "Caucasian." Or being male. Or being blue-eyed. Thus, any human rights accorded to me should be accorded to any other human.

What's so fucking hard to understand about that, FOX News fans?

CalamityJames April 26, 2011 at 12:29 pm

Ummm, hello, who are we supposed to hate then, you're so smart?

Steverino247 April 26, 2011 at 12:33 pm

People who drive while talking on cell phones, of course!

jqheywood April 26, 2011 at 4:22 pm

Oh, there is a special place in hell for them…if hell existed, of course, which it doesn't, but if it did…oooooh boy, fricassee city!

Doktor Zoom April 26, 2011 at 12:35 pm

Real American Christians and special needs children, of course.

imissopus April 26, 2011 at 12:48 pm

Oh I hate the special needs children, with their wee beady eyes and their legions of incoherent, illiterate fan clubs.

emmelemm April 26, 2011 at 2:23 pm

Damn! Harsh. Well, harsh but fair.

Chet Kincaid April 26, 2011 at 1:46 pm

"Or being tall. Or having those features called "Caucasian." Or being male. Or being blue-eyed."

STOP GAY-PRESSURIZING US!!!

smitallica April 26, 2011 at 5:47 pm

It's not that it's hard for Fox News to understand. They understand it perfectly. They ALSO understand that their viewership is made up entirely of mouth-breathing fuckwits, the people who make it necessary for Pop-Tarts to come with directions on the box.

BaldarTFlagass April 26, 2011 at 12:18 pm

The gay couple that owns the wine bar I frequent always try to get me to buy the BV Georges de Latour instead of the Goats Do Roam. Is that gay pressure?

fuflans April 27, 2011 at 2:54 am

yes.

politics_nerd April 26, 2011 at 12:20 pm

=======================================)

bagofmice April 26, 2011 at 2:19 pm

With a capital D~.

tessiee April 27, 2011 at 1:38 pm

So, politics_nerd is actually Jonah Falcon?

SheriffRoscoe April 26, 2011 at 12:20 pm

You guys laugh but high gay pressure can have serious health consequences. I've known guys who have hit the gym six days a week because of high gay pressure. Some of us have nearly bankrupted ourselves trying to treat it.

BaldarTFlagass April 26, 2011 at 12:24 pm

"I've known guys who have hit the gym six days a week because of high gay pressure."

You'd think that would only make it worse.

CapnFatback April 26, 2011 at 12:26 pm

Others have tried to treat it by "hitting" Jim.

phlox✔ April 26, 2011 at 12:20 pm

If you call it pegging then it's not gay. At all. No siree.

CapnFatback April 26, 2011 at 12:21 pm

I was always under the impression that gay pressure was a necessary step in applying sequins to a entertainer's garment. Apparently, that lawsuit just got bedazzled!

bagofmice April 26, 2011 at 2:21 pm

Disco Stu don't advertise.

SorosBot April 26, 2011 at 12:22 pm

Since Riley's already done the Bowie/Queen reference:

♫ You have to learn to pace yourself ♫
♫ Gay Pressure ♫
♫ You're just like everybody else ♫
♫ GayPressure ♫
♫ You've only had to fuck so far ♫
♫ So good ♫
♫ But you will come to a place ♫
♫ Where the only thing you feel ♫
♫ Are loaded dicks in your face ♫
♫ And you'll have to deal with ♫
♫ Gay Pressure ♫

Hatrabbit April 26, 2011 at 12:22 pm

'Gay Pressure' is a popular Republican Nightclub.

weejee April 26, 2011 at 12:24 pm

Faux Newz needs moar Viagra to stand tall against ghey pressure.

further to Serolf_Divad: F = ma
where F = Faux News, m = morans, and a = asshats.

GuyClinch April 26, 2011 at 12:25 pm

Slightly OT, but Prop 8 supporters are now saying the fed judge who ruled it unconstitutional should've recused himself b/c he's gay. By this logic, how could a breeder judge not have to recuse himself? Prop 8 supporters are stupid fucking ass-hookahs.

SorosBot April 26, 2011 at 12:27 pm

Show us your castration certificate!

Chet Kincaid April 26, 2011 at 2:01 pm

Would not castrati priests solve the Catholic Church's problem with the kiddies?

Maman April 26, 2011 at 12:27 pm

And that is surprising how?

GuyClinch April 26, 2011 at 12:32 pm

I know, I know, but even so, sometimes when I step back and grasp the totality of their stupid and cognitive dissonance, it turns my snark off.

Maman April 26, 2011 at 12:47 pm

Oh, I understand. It is staggering, the stupidity, isn't it?

WhatTheHolyHeck April 26, 2011 at 12:42 pm

It's especially hilarious in that this very argument undermines any attempt they might make that straight people have a compelling interest – and therefore standing – to sue over it.

Doktor Zoom April 26, 2011 at 12:47 pm

"now saying"? They were saying that within days hours of the decision….

GuyClinch April 26, 2011 at 12:52 pm

Yeah, but they just formally filed a motion to vacate the ruling based on this.

Doktor Zoom April 26, 2011 at 1:19 pm

Aha. Then clearly we need to apply Gay Pressure to vacate their motions. Deeply

bagofmice April 26, 2011 at 2:25 pm

Damn. I used my subpoena joke too soon. I blame the gay pressure.

Steverino247 April 26, 2011 at 1:52 pm

It's ok. The judge is a Republican, so the "having a partner" thing doesn't count.

GOPCrusher April 26, 2011 at 2:11 pm

Couldn't be a Republiklan. No self respecting Republiklan would ever engage in carnal knowledge with another member of the same sex. And certainly never outside the bonds of matrimony.

bagofmice April 26, 2011 at 2:27 pm

Leadership qualities?

widestanceroman April 26, 2011 at 12:29 pm

While America tearfully braces itself, gay pressure mounts a massive thrust against DOMA, pounding its way to a triumphant victory.

Worthly[♬♪♬♪♫♪♬]Skum April 26, 2011 at 3:24 pm

A burst of legislation will soon follow.

baconzgood April 26, 2011 at 12:30 pm

Too much Gay pressure gives you the bends.

memzilla April 26, 2011 at 12:48 pm

I thought it was the other way around?

bagofmice April 26, 2011 at 2:29 pm

Kinky.

freakishlywrong April 26, 2011 at 12:30 pm

again 2 % of the population trying to dictate to the other 98 %.
Again. Wingnuts exhibit more fucking projection than fucking Cannes.

JustPixelz April 26, 2011 at 12:32 pm

Of course, the opposite of Gay Pressure is Gay Suction. But, paradoxically, same effect. With enough gay suction even the firmest of law firms will hand off this case to some Johnny-come-lately rather than blow it for Boehner.

Poindexter718 April 26, 2011 at 12:33 pm

It's the emasculating Planned Parenthood & Code Pink Ladies' fault that Mark Foley, Larry Craig, George "Rentboy" Rekers and now this fine law firm are succumbing to the Gay Pressure.

bagofmice April 26, 2011 at 2:33 pm

So you're saying they've passed the bar? Or do we do this in psi?

chascates April 26, 2011 at 12:37 pm

Gay agenda revealed:
Democrats Want To Recruit Gay Immigrants To "Bring Down" America http://onenewsnow.com/Politics/Default.aspx?id=13
A grassroots border enforcement advocate is not surprised that a group of far left-wing congressional members would introduce a bill that gives special consideration to homosexuals who want to immigrate to the United States.
But he says this legislation fits right into the left's agenda of changing the traditional values that made America great.
"They're looking to bring in anybody challenging the established culture inside the United States that they want to bring down," Gheen suggests.

WhatTheHolyHeck April 26, 2011 at 12:43 pm

I just puked up my soul.

imissopus April 26, 2011 at 12:45 pm

This is good news for Glenn Greenwald!

SorosBot April 26, 2011 at 12:53 pm

Oh damn, the racism and homophobia there are just amazing. They refer to immigration as "importation"; and giving gay couples the same status as straight couples for family-based immigration is not "special consideration" but equal consideration, you fucks.

bagofmice April 26, 2011 at 2:36 pm

Everybody get down!

mourningnmerica April 26, 2011 at 3:44 pm

"…left's agenda of changing the traditional values that made America great…" Homosexuals – They Want America to Suck

or

Homosexuals – Bringing America to It's Knees

donner_froh April 26, 2011 at 12:39 pm

Fox News: We report, you laugh about how stupid we are.

a_pink_poodle April 26, 2011 at 12:39 pm

What's wrong with Queen?

PLINK PLONK!

proudgrampa April 26, 2011 at 12:42 pm

My, oh my! All this "Gay Pressure" talk feels like, well, being pressured (?!?!?).

OneYieldRegular April 26, 2011 at 12:44 pm

This is certainly deeply tragic and outrageous, given that straight pressure has never caused any adverse consequences for a gay person.

prommie April 26, 2011 at 12:51 pm

"Gay pressure" is when the invisible hand of the market gives your balls a good sharp squeeze.

Goonemeritus April 26, 2011 at 12:54 pm

Gay pressure is no joke, without it I would still be wearing Crocks with a sportcoat.

FlownOver April 26, 2011 at 12:59 pm

"Send in the clowns….

Don't bother… They're here."

BaldarTFlagass April 26, 2011 at 1:17 pm

Is it racist if I say "Gay Pressure" is how the Japanese pronounce "Gay Pleasure?"

bagofmice April 26, 2011 at 2:38 pm

That's Gaycist!

horsedreamer_1 April 26, 2011 at 1:21 pm

"Gay Pressure" is what made Vanilla Ice have to give up royalties to his hit.

bagofmice April 26, 2011 at 2:39 pm

I never knew Suge Knight was gay…

mrblifil April 26, 2011 at 1:21 pm

Thanks for that. I was thinking of The Selecter as soon as I saw the title for this post.

mrblifil April 26, 2011 at 2:11 pm

Oh shit the downfister hates that I know something about ska revival bands of the eighties. May Buster Bloodvessel smother you with his tongue Downfister!

mrblifil April 26, 2011 at 1:22 pm

With all the recent advances in lubrication and muscle relaxant technology, Gay Pressure is nowhere near the problem it used to be.

Doktor Zoom April 26, 2011 at 1:23 pm

Just enough, actually. I believe I am in love now.

Doktor Zoom April 26, 2011 at 1:25 pm

If that's not enough, you might need ANAL BLAST!!!!!!!

Chet Kincaid April 26, 2011 at 1:30 pm

Tea Party Members and other Conservatives: Check your Gay Pressure weekly, or even daily, if you are experiencing symptoms! Fortunately, there are many clinics in rest stops and public bathrooms nationwide where Gay Pressure can be assessed quickly and easily. (However, this may not be reimbursable through your Communist Flexible Spending Account.)

ttommyunger April 26, 2011 at 1:30 pm

Hee, hee; "erected".

lowaltflier April 26, 2011 at 1:36 pm

Gay Pressure = 21st century Kama Sutra.

ttommyunger April 26, 2011 at 1:40 pm

I have no doubt Doocey and his dark-haired little friend feel gay pressure every time Barry is on the tube; better known as the pressure building up inside their little knickers when their tiny pee-pees get hard.

Steverino247 April 26, 2011 at 1:50 pm

I wonder what happens if you're suddenly de-gay-pressurized? Do you get the bend-overs?

Doktor Zoom April 26, 2011 at 3:26 pm

A cock will drop from the overhead panel. Grasp it firmly and inhale naturally.

Extemporanus April 26, 2011 at 1:50 pm

Louis CK has something to say about gay pressure.

[NSFW...start at 4:00 min mark.]

Chet Kincaid April 26, 2011 at 1:55 pm

Gay Pressure is when you find it harder and harder every day to live up to your blue china.

V572..whatever April 26, 2011 at 1:59 pm

Okay, this is simple: Birthers. Other than that it's kinda lonely in there.

JoshuaNorton April 26, 2011 at 2:05 pm

Does it count as Gay Pressure if you were drunk at the time?

tessiee April 27, 2011 at 1:45 pm

I thought the rule was that nothing counts if you're:
1. Drunk,
2. On vacation,
3. Don't know each other's names.

Chet Kincaid April 26, 2011 at 2:12 pm

Thank you! You know, I loved The Specials and The Beat when they first came out (har har), but somehow never actually heard a Selecter song until today, although I knew of them.

bagofmice April 26, 2011 at 2:28 pm

Every inch of the way…

ttommyunger April 26, 2011 at 2:29 pm

Wait, What?

Doktor Zoom April 26, 2011 at 3:28 pm

I see everything twice!

ttommyunger April 26, 2011 at 5:14 pm

Is that like 2D?

doloras April 26, 2011 at 5:55 pm

I SEE EVERYTHING ONCE!

Doktor Zoom April 26, 2011 at 7:13 pm

We made you all better!

poncho_pilot April 26, 2011 at 2:51 pm

i was just wondering if "gay pressure" had anything do with the atm. and what's the unit of measurement for "gay pressure" called?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atmosphere_%28unit%2

Worthly[♬♪♬♪♫♪♬]Skum April 26, 2011 at 3:33 pm

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pulsatance

Note animated diagram of the effect.

Janinthepan April 26, 2011 at 2:58 pm

"Either the drapes go or I do"

mourningnmerica April 26, 2011 at 3:50 pm

I prefer the traditional version of the term, "queer pressure".

hollywooddood April 26, 2011 at 5:35 pm

Isn't gay pressure when we rub peeps?

doloras April 26, 2011 at 5:54 pm

He was so gay he called his band Queen.

BZ1 April 26, 2011 at 5:56 pm

The hoary old canard is being trotted out again (have I mixed enough metaphors…) that conceding anything to the gayz, is opening the way for every other "interpretation" for marriage, like marrying a piano stool or a banana peel…

WordSaladNation April 26, 2011 at 6:35 pm

Jesus Mary and Joseph, I spend much of my day telling middle school students not to use "gay" as a pejorative, and here goes FOX News doing the same thing!

Negropolis April 27, 2011 at 12:44 am

Do the kids still use it that way? I'm only in my mid-20's, but it was kind of dying out back when I was in high school.

Using gay as a pejorative is so gay.

Negropolis April 27, 2011 at 12:43 am

If you're gay pressure lasts longer than 4 hours…well, you've found yourself a good lay, I guess. If only everyone's pressure could last so long.

DarwinianDemon April 27, 2011 at 1:26 am

So Republicans wanted to pay this firm 500K dollars to defend DOMA? But I thought they were all about small government and reigning in spending? I'm shocked!

On a totally unrelated note, I just woke up from a 40 year coma. Did I miss anything?

tessiee April 27, 2011 at 1:26 pm

Freddie Mercury and 70s-era David Bowie were so fine they transcended all categories of "straight", "gay", "male", "female", and almost, "human". They were just gorgeous vortexes of cool and sexeh.

tessiee April 27, 2011 at 1:31 pm

"tent the Repubs have erected"

I see what you did there, although calling it "big" might not be strictly accurate.

tessiee April 27, 2011 at 1:44 pm

Somewhere on youtube, Britney Spears has a video where she's crying and yelling, 'LEAVE THE GEIGH ALONE!!"

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