LAST YEAR'S MODEL  2:01 pm April 19, 2011

Fading Literary Star Barack Obama No Longer Selling Any Books

by Ken Layne

Remember to pay enough taxes to bomb another 10,000 poor Afghan children.One-time bestselling author Barack Obama is just a backlist nobody these days, as income from the sales of his fictional biographies has dropped from more than five million a year to less than a million. Sure, that’s more than Joe Biden makes, but Joe Biden just works for his “pauper” government paycheck of $230,700 a year. How does Biden survive? Anyway, the White House released the Obamas’ tax return info to celebrate Tax Day, and it shows Barry & Michelle’s income has dropped from $5.5 million to a measly $1,728,096. Again, how do these people survive? Lots of leftovers and washing out ziplocs, that’s how!

The New York Times reports on what the White House told them to report:

Income for the Obama household continued to slip in 2010, tax returns show, as proceeds from President Obama’s best-selling books tapered off. But just as he has said, his income is easily high enough to make the family eligible for a tax increase under his own deficit-reduction proposals.

Thank the Kenyan God of Fiscal Conservatism that these rich people still have enough to potentially help America’s most neediest: the Federal Deficit. [NYT]

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 74 comments }

Barbara_i April 19, 2011 at 2:04 pm

Anyone got a copy of Palin's return?

ManchuCandidate April 19, 2011 at 2:06 pm

I suspect she's suffered a much more major drop in income from the 12 million hill billy dollars she made last year.

Eve8Apples April 19, 2011 at 2:15 pm

Trig is still coloring on it, so she had to get an extension.

SorosBot April 19, 2011 at 2:27 pm

Not wanting to reveal her income is probably one of the reasons she hasn't started officially running for President yet (see also Trump).

Lascauxcaveman April 19, 2011 at 2:45 pm

Speaking of Palin books, has teh Wonkettes reported on this upcoming insider tell-all yet?

(Appropriately mentioned in the "Entertainment" section of my local paper.)

Barbara_i April 19, 2011 at 3:25 pm

Yes, this has been all over the intertubes. I don't think any of the book hasn't been published on all the blogs already.

JoshuaNorton April 19, 2011 at 2:07 pm

Where's his Kenyan long form tax return?

Huh? Huh? AnSWeR Me111!!!!

Lionel[redacted]Esq April 19, 2011 at 3:14 pm

Siily Mr. Norton. Kenyan's don't pay taxes.

V572..whatever April 19, 2011 at 2:08 pm

Nothing's going right for Barry these days. He and Michelle will probably be reduced to penury after leaving office, just like the Clintons were.

hagajim April 19, 2011 at 2:08 pm

I'll bet he didn't even sell as many books as dead person Ayn Rand.

crybabyboehner April 19, 2011 at 2:28 pm

Are you sure? Have you seen her DEATH CERTIFICATE?

Lionel[redacted]Esq April 19, 2011 at 3:15 pm

Little known fact: Ayn Rand died in Kenya, having been shot by an Indonesian.

fuflans April 19, 2011 at 4:11 pm

yeah, but it'll make a better movie…

BaldarTFlagass April 19, 2011 at 2:08 pm

Eh, the White House kitchen probably gets a sizeable discount on hobo ribeyes.

user-of-owls April 19, 2011 at 2:09 pm

How much is that in renminbi?

LesBontemps April 19, 2011 at 2:16 pm

Hahaha, as if dollars could be traded for real money! You funny.

Frost/Nixon/Robocop April 19, 2011 at 2:09 pm

That will still buy a lot of ribs for Michelle to eat while our kids have to eat government mandated veggies.

DaRooster April 19, 2011 at 2:09 pm

We really need a recall now. The guy is truly not an American, what with his,"I could easily pay more taxes and help out the country" nonsense…
Kenyan!

Goonemeritus April 19, 2011 at 2:11 pm

His plan is to let it drop to $249,999 before he sticks it to the man.

Mumbletypeg April 19, 2011 at 2:11 pm

Lots of leftovers and washing out ziplocs, that’s how!

Quit reading my mail. You just described my entire workweek-lunch routine.

Rinsing out the ziplocs cuz I carry spent coffeegrounds from the office Bun-O-Matic home in 'em for my ecofriendly compost, if you must know!
/indignance

eastcoastelite April 19, 2011 at 2:16 pm

I'm glad I'm not alone in pilfering the office compost…..

YasserArraFeck April 19, 2011 at 2:48 pm

Don't forget to get your friendly neighborhood letter carrier to stop by and make a compost contribution "Go Green by Giving Brown"

emmelemm April 19, 2011 at 4:14 pm

I do that too! (Save up compost-y things from work – coffee grounds, apple cores – and take them home.)

Got-darned treehuggin' hippies!!!1!!

Eve8Apples April 19, 2011 at 2:12 pm

Looks like Barry and the girls are gonna have to help Michelle with the garden. How will they afford groceries on that pittance? Maybe they'll end up on food stamps or at the local food pantry.

bflrtsplk April 19, 2011 at 2:12 pm

If he's from Kenya, where'd he learn how to write?

axmxz April 19, 2011 at 3:24 pm

You mean if he's from Hawaii, where'd he learn how to write?

DahBoner April 19, 2011 at 4:21 pm

People from Hawaii learn how to write in sunscreen at an early age…

MissTaken April 19, 2011 at 2:14 pm

Twenty dolla make ya holla!

arihaya April 19, 2011 at 2:15 pm

perhaps if someone in his family get banged, pregnant and become abstinence advocate , his family will have more income …

weejee April 19, 2011 at 2:17 pm

OMG, Mrs. weejee washes out zip-locks like Michelle. Well she is my first, last & only lady.

Mumbletypeg April 19, 2011 at 2:46 pm

More power to her. Garbage Patch kids we ain't, she & I. (Not exactly part of the cure, but at least forestalling the inevitable?…)

DerrickWildcat April 19, 2011 at 2:17 pm

He gets a company car and a gas allowance so he saves quite a bit of money on that.

nounverb911 April 19, 2011 at 2:25 pm

Which is more than the state senators in CA get now.

freakishlywrong April 19, 2011 at 2:17 pm

This is all over the place today. Fuck that. Release the gigantic infant's tax returns so we can see how little he actually made. Hell, he's probably paying the highest tax rates, the lions share, like the rest of us working poors.

SorosBot April 19, 2011 at 2:18 pm

He's certainly got a long way to go before he catches up to the world's two bestselling authors, Anonymous and Various.

user-of-owls April 19, 2011 at 2:18 pm

Utterly tangential, but a headline on America's Greatest News Outlet, Drudge, says:

"Haley Barbour undergoes surgery for campaign-related ailment…"

Guess all that blubber was actually weighing him down in the polls.

KenLayIsAlive April 19, 2011 at 2:27 pm

"campaign-related ailment…"

He confused a sack of campaign buttons for his box of Ritz Crackers (again)?

haha. That ritzy cracker.

SayItWithWookies April 19, 2011 at 2:32 pm

Guess he really did blow it out his ass.

Texan_Bulldog April 19, 2011 at 2:51 pm

campaign-related ailment=lap band surgery

Nothingisamiss April 19, 2011 at 6:18 pm

exactly what I was set to type!

user-of-owls April 19, 2011 at 6:48 pm

I was gonna go with lobotomy, you know, just to establish some cred with the base.

ShaveTheWhales April 19, 2011 at 10:52 pm

Cranio-rectal dissection?

KeepFnThatChicken April 19, 2011 at 2:20 pm

Precarious balance of those Chef-Boy-AR-Dee microwaveable meals, there. Barry may need to move, lest he get clocked in a Save-A-lot avalanche.

Lionel[redacted]Esq April 19, 2011 at 2:20 pm

Did he report how much Iran is paying him to set up the Muslim Caliphate here in the US?

KenLayIsAlive April 19, 2011 at 2:25 pm

Oh, he just does that for free.

mereoblivion April 19, 2011 at 2:27 pm

Ain't paying him Shi-ite, me-an!

KenLayIsAlive April 19, 2011 at 2:20 pm

It's called "The Audacity of Constant Compromise".

Eve8Apples April 19, 2011 at 2:21 pm

Instead of selling books, he can sell autographed laminated copies of his birf certificate to the birfers for $100.00 a pop.

DahBoner April 19, 2011 at 4:23 pm

# WIN

Lionel[redacted]Esq April 19, 2011 at 2:22 pm

How can we expect a president who is making less than $5 mil/year to understand the terrible burden this country places on the rich.

LesBontemps April 19, 2011 at 2:22 pm

This is good news for that John McCain kid, obvs.

chascates April 19, 2011 at 2:23 pm

His mother-in-law takes care of the kids in return for 3 hots and a cot.

ablington April 19, 2011 at 2:24 pm

No wonder Republicans hate him, he's so poor.

horsedreamer_1 April 19, 2011 at 2:26 pm

Meawhile, last year's mohel had the foreskin to put a little something away, in the event the economy turned south.

crybabyboehner April 19, 2011 at 2:26 pm

Doesn't Biden do oil changes and tune-ups on the weekend to pick up a few extra bucks?

chicken_thief April 19, 2011 at 2:39 pm

You make fun, but that's a BIG FUCKING DEAL….

Gopherit April 19, 2011 at 2:27 pm

This makes me wonder how Coulter reported her 5 cartons of marlboros and year's worth of hormone injections for her latest book.

nounverb911 April 19, 2011 at 2:27 pm

"but Joe Biden just works for his “pauper” government paycheck of $230,700 a year. How does Biden survive? "
Jill helps. How much does she make as a professor?

SorosBot April 19, 2011 at 2:27 pm

It'll come out around the same time as Duke Nukem 3D.

poncho_pilot April 19, 2011 at 2:41 pm

and Atlas Shrugged 2: The Search For More Money.

BaldarTFlagass April 19, 2011 at 2:31 pm

Book sales go up, book sales go down. How do you explain it?

Trannysurprise April 19, 2011 at 2:33 pm

I hope he doesn't get blacklisted. Oh, wait.

Mumbletypeg April 19, 2011 at 2:33 pm

hur, dur, CRUNCH *fishes loose coffee ground from between molars*

It also sucks when you don't rinse the bags enough, and next day's sandwich chafes your gumline like a grain of sand. (I know. sand…wich…)

freakishlywrong April 19, 2011 at 2:44 pm

Elitist. You can afford to recycle Ziploc bags, as well as have a "sandwich" for lunch. Is this thing, this "sandwich" canned?

Mumbletypeg April 19, 2011 at 3:06 pm

We eat sand when we run out crawdad and the rest. How longsuffering has your meal-taking been compromised? You haven't exactly convinced me yet you're in a tight spot!

DerrickWildcat April 19, 2011 at 2:35 pm

That stack of Spaghetti-Os is a lawsuit waiting to happen.

chicken_thief April 19, 2011 at 2:38 pm

Have you seen the price of arugula at Whole Foods these days? Them Obama's is one step away from homelessness….

Limeylizzie April 19, 2011 at 2:53 pm

Can we stop hating on Barry for every slightest thing, please?

ShaveTheWhales April 19, 2011 at 10:56 pm

Mmm, Elizabeth, I think in this particular case Ken is just being, you know, ironic.

The hate is usually easier to spot.

Warpde April 19, 2011 at 2:57 pm

Well now, that's a sigh of relief. I only have to work 31.9 years now to make what the First couple make in a year. Beats the hell out of the 100 years I was looking at last year.

BZ1 April 19, 2011 at 3:02 pm

Time for Bo to write a tell-all??

Lionel[redacted]Esq April 19, 2011 at 3:16 pm

The joke is on everyone else, as Obama only accepts payment in gold.

anti0aquabudda April 19, 2011 at 5:46 pm

Obama's next book will be titled:
"How I vilified the 'rich', did nothing to raise their taxes, then went on to become one"

Negropolis April 20, 2011 at 12:10 am

Oh. My. God. Ken. Are you serious? Are you this petty with that fucking ridiculous title?

You are so behaviourally weak.

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