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Haha, the guy thought the mailman “had a bunch of packages for us.” Well, the mailman did have a bunch of packages — packages of poop! (Unwrapped.)

It is also great that the teevee news anchor describes a person defecating as “unthinkable” if done in “broad daylight.” Teevee reporters poop through their mouths, on teevee, so it’s understandable how they would be deeply offended by “what humans do when there’s no approved toilet around.”

Also, is it common to refer to a father looking after his own child as “babysitting”? Wouldn’t that just be “looking after your own child?” Perhaps babysitting has changed a lot, in this economy — perhaps the gazillion long-term unemployed in this country now classify themselves as “babysitting interns.”

Anyway, just bookmark this the next time somebody makes some remark about Portland being such a hipster socialist city or whatever. Most of Portland is exactly like what you see in this video report: a bunch of confused white people descended from lumber mill workers with brain injuries. [TeeVee Channel 3, via The Awl]

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