So why is the “World’s Greatest Nation of Health Care” about to shut down, again? Right, because crybaby jerkwad John Boehner hates evil womenfolk so much and all his misogynist closet-case Republican donors hate women so much and did you know what is gross? A woman, with her “lady parts” and all wanting to “not have crotch cancer” or whatever. Ladies are disgusting, because if you need to put a penis somewhere, what on earth is wrong with a young boy’s mouth? And these gross things, the womens, think they will get some kind of “contraception” or “cancer screening” even though they are poor? Jezebels! Burn in hell with cancer, Jezebels! Whores of Babylon!
As many of the “policy bloggers” are typing today, Planned Parenthood is basically the entire reason the gaylord Republicans are going to shut down the United States Government (except for the war killin’ part). Even though just 3% of Planned Parenthood’s budget is spent on abortion — and none of Planned Parenthood’s federal funding, obviously — the point is that some gal somewhere might get some idears about how she could think she’s so high falutin’ she’ll go see the old coat-hanger doc without the menfolk’s permission. And people wonder why we have domestic violence!
Anyway, we hope America is shut down not just for a while, but for good. Forever. We would like to nail John Boehner to the United States entrance sign, wherever it is. (Over a young boy’s crying mouth?) And then we would paint on John Boehner’s beautiful dapper suit, “CLOSED FOREVER.” This would be both a sign and a symbol.
You know who might make good use of this country? THE RED COMMUNIST CHINESE. At least they know how to run a business.
Here’s a “Friday Fun Video” sent by Wonkette operative “Nichole” and apparently featuring her sister “Renee.” It makes a good point, but it does sort of gloss over the part about how all right-wing men are closet cases who are actually super happy about not having to close their eyes and fantasize about Billy Ray Cyrus again, for the whole 25 seconds they have to spend in their wives’ vagina.
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In China, they only abort the girl babies, thereby creating fewer hoohaws to examine. Why hasn't anyone thought of this? Hoohaws are nothing but seething cauldrons of sinful lust.
Problem solved.
High fives all around. Too late to get a tee time for the morning?
I'm sure Obama can get him one.
Also, is that video supposed to persuade moderates that Planned Parenthood provides women with health services aside from abortions? I didn't get that at all.
You think a bunch of liberal women saying "I won't have sex with you" is going to change anyone's mind about women's health issues? The word "vagina" is extremely uncomfortable to your target segment, you've just offended the group you are trying to sway.
And regarding technical merit, the best you could do was beat a dead horse? You had ten women read a script, then cut back and forth amongst them as they brag about how they control the pussy? Wouldn't it have been a better idea to have a few women who said things like "I found out I had cancer after a visit to Planned Parenthood, I'm alive today to be a great mom for my two girls".
It was polarizing, tedious and foolish. You're making the problem worse, not better. Go take some marketing classes.
I know, right? Vagina Monologues, blahblahblah…
I think it was damn effective at boosting morale for the vajayjays, however. I for one am all tingly.
I like the woman who cackled and said "period". She's the kind of lady I like to drink with.
Srsly. The sillier the better when alcohol's involved, I say!
Uh, Lysistrata? In case you're not up on your ancient Greek plays, you can read the SparkNotes: http://www.sparknotes.com/drama/lysistrata/summar…
Since this was a Second City joint, the actual "target segment" is Wonkette.
The presumptive "target segment" is vagina-havers, with emphasis on those who may have used PP's services. This clearly isn't intended to be a persuasive essay; it's rallying the base. With a side order of suggesting that vagina-providers might want to determine the attitudes of their vagina-consumers regarding women's health care.
I quite liked it. It was, you know, "snarky".
Still, it is preaching to the choir. Or to the baby cave. Or something.
I thought it had a surfeit of pretentiousness and a paucity of humor.
I thought it was pretty funny. YMM(obvs)V.
I'm pretty sure this wasn't for moderates – because moderates already know the facts- and may or may not care if they are pitching for votes from brain dead right wing voters..This week. I heard women speaking about how planned parenthood found their cancer early and saved them- and how PP is monitoring the daughters of one woman because she has the breast cancer gen(while this woman currently ahs stage 3 breast cancer). The facts are out there-if you don't get your news from Fox or WND
The fact is that this was done by second city(sdo you know who they are??) and a real ad about PP makes no difference because the shitheads and teabaggers in Congress and their moronic bible thumping followers have no interest in the facts, in poor women's health or anything besides what a lying soundbite tells them. PP provides abortions- not with federal money -but any abortion support is evil and bad to these people. The discussion is really not about facts anymore anyway. We are way beyond facts in America.
Seething cauldrons of sinful lust sounds naughty and hot and…I think you just made me gay. What were we talking about?
Well, many Republicans never seem to plan parenthood for themselves, so…
(looking at you Snowbilly)
Only elitists plan their pregnancies.
Unplanned Parenthood = "our way of life"
and grandparenthood
A word of the wise to Boehner if he picked the wrong week to quit smoking:
"Fear not the cough to carry you off;
Fear the coffin we'll carry you off in."
Signed,
Women of the United States
+10
I hope he dies during the shutdown, so he will never have a dead certificate.
Back at you. Something you posted earlier today made me laugh, and then start conjuring what long acronym your username must stand for. If you'd rather not divulge, well at least I'm having fun guessing…
I might be wrong but I think it’s a tip of the hat to the best pickup line ever from Anchorman.
I'll have to check that out, having not seen it yet. Also not having become familiar w/ B…O's position on the slidey-scale of Prez-love/haterz, I hope it doesn't offend that I was thinking of going with "Barack 'Tarnished Winner Bravely Forgets Democratic Intelligence Might Hurt' Obama"
My guess: BTW by the way BFD big fucking deal IMHO in my humble opinion…
But I'd like to hear this pick-up line from Anchorman.
I mean, death certificate….
Will that disqualify him from… anything?
Enjoy, all:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GeI5ke0BENw
always the wrong week:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zOvkTUuOAVM&fe…
Its not the details of the thing, but the principle behind it. And the principle is, say any dumbass thing possible to get elected and thus kickbacks from wealthy donors. All together now: MUSLIM KENYAN ACORNS ARE ABORTING OUR BABIES!
Gee whiz, all anyone has to do is ask Smoker Face a sentimental question and he'll start babbling like a baby. Why is it not used on him every day on every issue?
"Got a light?"
I say just give all the money to Bristol.
Her chain of Bristol Meth labs could use financing.
Amen.
The pie chart clearly explains the whole issue. The "abortion services" wedge takes up far too much space on Boehner's favorite cryin' cheek.
Oh No! What will Lindsey Graham do for attention now?
I, for one, am waiting for Jowl Lieberman to declare war on it.. whatever it is.
Republican morality = telling other people who, when and how they can fuck, while personally fucking everybody every which way they can.
WIN! of the fucking century! (have I mentioned yet today how much I fucking hate these sexually repressed fat old white men, especially when they invoke MY name for their bullshit *morality*)
I am stealing this for my next rally- I may have to change the fuck word though- for the childrfen.
I think it's just because lady parts gross out The Boner.
If he never met a vagina he did like, he's not meeting with vaginas often enough.
Does the 1% "Other Services" of Planned Parenthood (as per the chart) include cleaning up Bush messes?
At least one percent of their budget, sadly, is for security around not only their clinics, but their employees' homes as well, because being "pro-life" sometimes has a very strange meaning.
Probably Santorum messes. You know, all the froth and stuff.
d'ya you mean other services like the 'fetus-in-a-jar' special that Bar Bush was so proud of extracting from her hoohaw? then the answer is yes!
Fucking fuckers and the fucks who elected them. I like the cancer & STD free hoohaws.
Why do you hate America?
I kinda dig the baby free hoohaws.
No money for the womenfolk who need healthcare and birth control, lots of money for war. This is the new Sharia Law bill, right?
Allahu Akbar!
Has anyone explained to Boehner where little Boehners come from yet?
da butt?
his pants?
There's something quite "Wizard of Oz-ish" about that picture, but I just can't put my finger on it.
Pay no attention to the man behind the pie-chart!
I always thought Boehner looked like the moon in the early silent film "Le Voyage Dans La Lune," except for the coloring: http://www.filmreference.com/Films-Vi-Wi/Le-Voyag…
I would upfist you all night long if I could for that reference…
Do you like The Mighty Boosh? "The Moon" character was a bit of an homage: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AGmPEVwqDVk
And maybe a little Armenian cabdriver in there, as well.
"Finger" is probably not the best word choice in this context. Oh, wait – I mean it is the perfect choice.
Nobody sees the Boehner! Not no way, not no how!
Let's see. Cowardly Lion? No. Coward and lying. Yeah, that's it!
Horseface of a different color?
Margaret Sanger is not amused!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Margaret_Sanger
Ooh, just a fun little sidenote about our feminist forebears. Hate the sin, not the sinner, my brother or sister.
Yeah, but they'll try to get us on the whole "Margaret Sanger was a Eugenicist. You liberals always want to kill everybody."
I'm always leery about mentioning her name, for that very reason.
Someone do the math here… uh, 3% of 11.4mil in 2009 works out to… $342,000 USD? Really? By the Maker, there are SPORTS CARS more expensive than that! You can't even fire a Tomahawk missile with that money!
The thing that enrages me most is that some lowlife lobbyist– a WOMAN!– is fucking Boehner with the full knowledge that he is playing petty chickenshit games with women's health. This bugs me nearly as much as the fact that Ken Mehlman bought a multi-million-dollar condo in Chelsea and some self-hating queer is sucking that scumbag's dick. We can only hope that these worthless shitheads have no access to contraception or VD treatment when they most need it.
Well, I kinda hope they DO have access to contraception.
"We can only hope that these worthless shitheads have no access to contraception or VD treatment when they most need it. "
They are working on it.
Is Victoria Jackson's funny twin sister in that video?
That is the first time "funny" and "Victoria Jackson" have been used in the same sentence since 1991.
tee hee hee, period !
he wants his face to be the only leather mitt in town.
Leather mitt vs. ham wallet, boys.
Remember to ask for the triple B-J–Boehner. Brand. Beef. Jerky. It's like chewing on my face!
Everybody knows that women getting pap smears bankrupted the economy. It's the vaginas, stupid.
Mr. Ken Layne, sir, you are an artist and your medium is ripping the shit out of the GOP on the internet.
Seriously, though, fuck these misogynist douchebags. GTFO my government.
…and GTFO my vagina, or at least your vagina? (btw, that's some mighty fine p-ness ya got there Ms Kathryn!)
I love Hoo Haw!
That Junior Samples – what a hoot.
SA-lute!
I wouldn't touch John Boehner with someone else's vagina.
neither would he
A healthy vagina is a happy vagina. And we don't want the country suddenly over run with happy vaginas do we?
No, but it sure is being over-run by cunts at the moment.
I took a v'gina to the movie
Didn't have to pay to get it in
V'gina, v'gina, laughing happy v'gina
V'gina, v'gina, eat 'em up, yum..
personally I LUVS me some happy vagina!
Well, I know I'll never need PP again. Just looking at Boner's face made my vagina shrivel up and die.
You said it, sister. Mine shut down in self defense.
Honestly. Mine is crying.
I hate it when my 'gina has mood swings.
My tits ran away, too. I now look like that Marilyn Manson album cover. Thanks a lot, Boner.
Clank!
You mean Planned Parenthood isn't just about aborting babies to sell to the pet food industry? Maybe we should rethink shutting down the entire government just to appeal to wingtards.
The GOP is all about efficiency: What's the point of diagnosing cervical cancer, if you can't afford to pay the doctor out of pocket for treatment and don't have health insurance anyway?
YES, you deserve 100 thumbs up for this.
Cute vid. Not so much Vagina Monologues.. . more like a Vagina Cantata.
all right-wing men are closet cases who are actually super happy about not having to close their eyes and fantasize about Billy Ray Cyrus again
IDK, Cyrus might be a little old for this crowd: I see them as more the Justin Bieber type. Either him, or that kid who sang that song about freedom and such on top of Mount Rushmore.
Justin Beiber and sex- I am really old(and a woman) and the image makes me ill.
I'm not crazy about the "Billy Ray Cyrus and sex" image, either.
I'd like to see Cecile Richards (pres. of Planned Parenthood & daughter of bad ass TX Gov. Ann Richards) stick a carton of cigarettes up John Boehner's ass and twist sideways. Give that dickwad something to really cry about–because by the time he dies of lung cancer, he will be a nobody/has been whom no one will even remember.
I'm hoping that he will be struck with it in 3,2,… So that we can remember the good times with him, handing out checks from big tobacco on the floor and all that, as his insides metasticize into goo. Couldn't happen to a better candidate for the disease.
Light them first.
Thank you for the information. I did not know she was Ann's daughter. Now it is less surprising that she is such a stud.
You are looking at this through the distorting filter of reality and decencies. A significant part on Boehner’s base is against way more than abortion in that pie chart. For example contraception, STD screening and even some cancer screening pisses off the God bothers. And don’t get them started on other services.
Shorter: If you have a muffin, then die! Die, damn you!!
"Pap smear? I thought everybody was talking about Planned Parenthood giving women Pabst Beer." – John Boehner
hey oh!
Do they offer grooming services for Christine O'donnell's super fur burger?
Ok I didnt need that kind of imagery in my brain, so now I will go drink liquor.
Don't make me bust out the blue waffle again.
I think they support all forms of birth control, and as I recall, the guy who pornblogged about her crotchbound yak ranch found his dingus had inverted itself at the sight of it, or something.
So they'd probably opt to leave her bramble-bushed.
"crotchbound yak ranch" FTW
Agreed.
If you aren't 1000p by the end of the weekend for that awesomeness, then this world just isn't worth living in!
Some of us like a bit o' fur in our burgers. Gee.
You, sir or madam, are my knd of guy for that and also for the Serge reference on your avatar.
This may have been thought of already, but I've never seen it. Some enterpreneur should have a muff spa, for those of us who don't want to go full Brazilian, but who do want to be all groomed 'n' cute. They could have trims into heart shapes, landing strips, etc., and maybe fun colors like pink and blue. I would *so* go, especially during bathing suit season. Oh, yeah, and they should have a special on heart shapes for Valentine's Day.
That's the "other" 1%.
"We shall fight in the muffins, we shall fight on the treasure trails, we shall fight in the plowed fields and in the nappy dugouts, we shall fight on the tracks of land; we shall never surrender, and if, which I do not for a moment believe, this hoohaw or a large part of it were subjugated and starving, then our Empire beyond the seas, armed and guarded by the Great Beef Curtain, would carry on the struggle, until, in God's good time, the new world, with all its power and might, steps forth to the rescue and the liberation of the fuck hole."
(Dabs tear away from corner of eye) Well said, Well said indeed! (Sniffs, dabs tear from opposite eye, claps loudly, but slowly in reverence, applause builds into deafening roar) (Gentle fade to black)
Raise your sword, brave Beardclam, for they may take our lives, but they will never take our hoo-haas!
Ha, Ha, Ha…..
You said Fuck hole.
I hear da Boner is looking for one.
Your not a male by any chance???
Never have so many fapped so much to so little.
or
This was their finest "O."
Contraception is 35%. You gotta have a baby if yer gonna fuk. That's the rule and yer gone against God if you don't do that. Every time you fuk you gotta have a baby. Tha's in the Bible. Or it was on TV. Cause babies have to be born or we have to raise taxes and poor people get all our hard earned monies. Babies are gifts from God we can leave in the dumpster next to the railroad tracks if it's too much trouble. If you wear a rubber yer going to hell. I read that in a magazine. Plus, it don't feel as good. I think.
well played sir *golf clap*
Yup, I had a friend whose sister had two kids she couldn't support with – well, never sure who the dads were anyway – because CONTRACEPTION Is wrong. If you have sex, you have to have a baby. This is what she learned in church(although as it was a Catholic church- I guess the priests weren't worried because none of the altar boys got pregnant)
Of all the ways our world might be brought to its knees, never in my wildest dreams did I think it would be because of cooties.
+1 would fist again
Well this is embarrassing…we'll go down in history as the country fell due to hoohaws
I'm not a gynecologist, but I'll take a look.
I'm not a gynecologist but I did stay at a Holiday Inn last night…
Well of course your not a gynecologist, you'd be in congress if you were. Seriously though what is it with all the doctors in congress? Don't they have like you know patients to attend to?
I wanted to major in Nursing, but my milk dried up.
The Republicans have a point. Given that women are constantly bleeding down there, what the hell can medical science do for their lady parts?
Plus, as Newt Gingrich once observed, they are getting infections every month. Hell, a real doctor worth his salt would go nowhere near that brewing cauldron of septic ladyhood. Just think of the children!
It's "coochie," not "hoohaw." That is all.
In the spirit of cooperation and compromise so lacking in our reps, may I suggest "hoochie?"
why not coochaw?
In scientific terminology, the external part is a "muffin" and the internal part is a "wooch".
I prefer "moist fistula" myself. Or "mucus filmed love hole", if you want to get sexy about it.
The gates to heaven always seemed more descriptive and accurate to me.
"The gates of heaven, they budged an inch, nothing much has happened since."
The Magic Kingdom–because it's the Happiest Place on Earth.
Mango begs to differ.
Well, "cha-cha".
I prefer good old fashioned domestic shorthair pussy, thank you very much.
And if aunt flo is sleeping on the couch, I will just go around the back door.
You must be Glenn Beck cause you slingin' some gold round here.
Puh-leeze. It's "Ladygarden."
You win the future with "Ladygarden."
I'm telling the FL legislature on you. You said "coochie".
Coochie! Coochie! Coochie! Fuck the FL lege! The Uterati have spoken!
"Analog Flesh-light"
OK, true story:
A few years back, I had a summer job on the playground. One of the kids pointed to her crotch and said, "We don't use baby words for things. We call things by their proper names! Do you know what the proper name for this is?"
Me: I would like you to tell me.
Kid [condescendingly]: It's CHINA!
Well, that's what Barbie has printed on hers…
I suppose this means we can look forward to a new Title X family planning agency called Unplanned Parenthood, directed by Bristol Palin?
This comment deserves more visibility.
Next up: Shutting down PETA.
People are going to look back on this time and think "What were they drinking?"
Unfortunately not cyanide flavored cool-aid.
I am earnestly awaiting the Cervix Lock Act of 2011. Remember ladies, no one knows better than the republicans and Jesus what you can do with your body. Surrender now.
*sigh* I got nuthin' left. It's Friday afternoon and the guys runnin' the joint have officially gone BAT. SHIT. INSANE. so there is nothing left to do but drink, drink, drink, and drink some more. Fuck 'em all.
A favorite group of mine, The Evangenitals, has a song about that…
cheers!
How is that fucking anyone but you?
Why not just change the name "Planned Parenthood" to "Family Values Institute"; that should do it…
Double speak swings both ways, eh?
I always wondered why Lysistrata never made the bigtime…
John,
If your so against Planned Parenthood, how about we put your wife and daughters at the front of the line of people who will never receive PAP smears or any other preventative care. Oh that's right, I and all of the other taxpaying Americans pay for your health care since your a legislator. You keep forgetting that little factoid.
Fucktard hypocritical asshole.
Cost of planned parenthood over last decade :
$10 billion US (approximately)
Cost of Iraq "war" over last decade:
$3 trillion US (approximately)
And the Republicans want us to believe they care about
human lifethe economy.Just incorporate your uterus, and Republicans will let it do whatever the hell it wants. Be sure to have it hire some lobbyists:
http://incorporatemyuterus.com/
Mine's name is 'Yootie'. I thought that was better than 'Eunice' or 'Bleedy'.
I know the Boner, and most/all Repubs ( exceptin the ladies) likes boy's boners but why is he trying to fuck the men who appreciate a vagina?
I like vagina. I came out of one you know.
Keeps my teeth clean…Unless they shave.
In protest of this horrible travesty, all true, liberty-loving Americans who are in possession of referenced "hoo-hahs" (sp?) should go out to their nearest drinking establishment, get rip-roaring drunk, find a suitable partner, and give their "hoo-hah" a workout that it won't forget for years to come.
For freedom!
Um, yeah…
In *protest*, that's the ticket…
C'mon Republicans, think of your beards!
Win win fucking WIN!11!!!one!uno
Hi I'm Senator Larry Craig and I'd just like to set the record straight I am not a gay man and neither is my wife.
If not the beards, at least the merkins!
So the "get the government off my back and out of my life" crowd want to tell women how to manage their hoohaws. Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!
Remind every woman in your life that voted for the Republicans last fall:
THIS IS WHAT YOU VOTED FOR!
There's another website that I frequent (Trees and Things) that has a user (ok, douchebag) there that says that Planned Parenthood serves no useful purpose to the security and stability to the nation. There are many there who follow this same line of logic. C'mon over and spread so love. it may not be as satisfying as carpet bombing Breibart trolls, but it's super easy to get an account.
Well, I blame sperm.
I really hope that the next time Boehner orders a glass of merlot at the Capitol Grille or Bistro Bis, the exhausted, hard-working crampy waitress who can't get her pap smear fills his glass with menstrual discharge.
That is totally, off-the-wall disgusting and gross.
And yet, not at all uncalled for. I second the motion.
"That is totally, off-the-wall disgusting and gross."
Which is precisely what makes it AWESOME.
Is it better than poop-filled vodka?
I salute you for that awe-inspiring concept. If we could promote it to actual meme status, we could probably put the Bone right off of red wine forever.
I wouldn't be opposed to that, but who she *really* should do it to is Clarence Thomas.
Well, how dare those uppity wiminz seek out cancer screenings and infection treatment or *gasp* birth control so less funding (federal or otherwise) gets spent on birth control? How dare they think they have the right to see a doctor or actually make decisions? Don't they know their place? If a man chooses to have sex with a wimminz (instead of a little boy), the wimminz don't get a say- and any resulting disease/ pregnancy is just a lemon to make lemonade with! Besides, to go to the doctor, they have to leave the kitchen!
Uggg Boehner makes me sick. I mean, for all the obvious reasons, but also the fact that this turd-faced kiddie-diddler thinks it's acceptable to control not just women but anyone who might attempt to actually treat them like human beings capable of making decisions about their lives themselves. I know republicans have no concept of consent when it comes to sex, whether it's with women or men or children – or maybe they just don't value women and children enough to actually think they need consent. Where does such arrogance come from? Where does this mindset that they are somehow SO much better than all others, smarter, wiser, better at making decisions – and that they should therefore get to control everyone else? Is it an extension of trying to control the economy and their workers for their profits over the years? is it the result of the tea party and their endless stupidity and willingness to do whatever they're told?
Boehner, you get a say in what I do with my lady parts when I give you permission to put any part of your body anywhere near my lady parts. In other words, never. Go fry in a tanning bed, you old wrinkle-balled incest-baby piece of shit.
hmm, time to start investing in bulk condoms and passing them out in front of the federal building downtown, I guess.
"Where does such arrogance come from? Where does this mindset that they are somehow SO much better than all others, smarter, wiser, better at making decisions – and that they should therefore get to control everyone else? "
My best guess is that it's that sense of entitlement that comes from being born into a family with shit-tons of money.
Excuse me for this, but…
WHY THE FUCK DO I HAVE TO HEAR ALL THESE FUCKING SEGMENTS HUMANIZING AND IDOLIZING TEABAGGER HACKS AND GOP HYPOCRITES ON FUCKING NPR EVERY FUCKING DAY? HEY NPR – THEY'RE GOING TO DE-FUND YOU ANYWAY, STOP EATING THE SHIT OUT OF THEIR ASSES.
Okay, feel better now. Carry on.
thank you very much. (was it paul ryan loving 'zeppelin' that did it?).
i have been ranting that over and over in the last couple weeks and i don't think i can do it again.
for the pride of the 'p'.
to be fair, helen of troy had a hoohaw and look how well that turned out.
The Founding Fathers did not put Planned Parenthood in the Constitution, much to the dismay of Thomas Jefferson and other seekers of slave hoo-haw.
Get government off our backs and into the womens cooters where it belongs
GOP wants to replace PP with "BristolCare – The Baby Miracle Foundation"….clinic visits include free meth, Pabst, cockrings, Bon Jovi CDs, dirty mattresses and baby nyquil .
Ahem… Bon Jovi, you say?
Is it the fact that something is planned that makes these fuckers hate this organization so much?
To paraphrase a scene from The Right Stuff…
The issue here isn't pussy. The issue here is monkey.
See what Gus is sayin' here is that the TeaBaggers think the President is a monkey and they'll do anything to try to get him out of the White House.
The issue here is funding. If the Republicans can cut off the funding to the President's base, they know he's got no funding to run for President.
No bucks, no black Presidents.
yep.
fuck it all. let's paint all the buildings in America red, rename it "Hell", and make the dwarf Sheriff. who's with me?
Go Clint! The problem is that the bad guys are already in Lago, er DC. We may have to paint at night, like in Life of Brian.
nice. the reference material:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IIAdHEwiAy8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cchIYU1k6X8
Got your back buddy.
cunts
ICKY — why must we squirmish over ladyparts? The only solution is tax cuts.
Fuckin' please, motherfuckers. If it was planned dispensing little blue pills for fat wheezy diabetic conservative men who can't get it up hood, they'd be threatening to shut down the government in order to increase its funding.
Hey, I just got here. What did I miss?
(no, seriously, this is the first chance I've had today to look at the Wonkett AND APPARENTLY I'VE MISSED QUITE A LOT)
In the radio-quiet zone that is my occasional workplace, there is no wifi, no cell phone service. I am forced to "wait until I get home from work to waste time on the internet", as they say.
:(
Quick rap up is we're doomed, general consensus is we all need to start drinking.
Hope that helped
I'm waaaaaaay ahead of you.
Drinking on the job again, Dewey?
a) I live in Mountain Time Zone, and
b) yes.
I feel your pain – the changes at my office make getting to Wonkette a dubious proposition at best. How am I supposed to find time to go through all of the insightful commentary in the few pitiful hours between coming home and going to sleep before my wretched existence starts over again tomorrow.
There's like 200 comments/article these days. When the fuck am I gonna read all that crap?
[now]
Just another day in the-Republicans-are-laughable-idiots-who-nevertheless-are-in-position-to-further-degrade-life for-almost-all-citizens America.
Apparently, we all missed a turn thirty or forty years back up the quantum-mechanical alternatives tree. I hope my eigenselves are enjoying life.
You can't simultaneously know your trajectory and your eigenselves' trajectory.
So, Schroedinger's Cat may or may not go into a bar…
So this state trooper pulls over Werner Heisenberg and says, "Sir, do you know how fast you were going just now?" And Heisenberg says, "I have no idea. But I know exactly where I am."
(Traffic stop fascism!)
WTF? Why did Ken delete my post? It was just a lame, harmless call-and-response joke. Sometimes I don't get this place.
Dear Boner,
I hope you knock up that lobbyist chick you're banging on the side. And i hope she CHOOSES to keep it (see that all caps word? that's the thing we libtards want, a bloody choice). I hope shes sues your ass for alimony, and i hope you get sued again for divorce. I hope it forces you to resign.
Boner i want karma to bite down on your balls like it was the star of a Triple X German porn.
Signed, teh downfist troll.
I think KochBot's new name is 'TastyLeadPaintChips™' (which I'm sure is a snack of choice), if anyone cares.
herf derf hilarious. oh man that kockbutt, really had a future here except for the being a raving wingnut part.
Repigs are just lucky that pathological lying isn't a felony. Unfortunately for our side, the most effective way of dealing with it is.
If thre's a deal, does that mean the John Boehner and Harry Reid get married?
Religious zealots hate women not closet cases moron.
Also, I would like to bang the nice asian lady with the polkadot scarf, if you are her.
I'm not her, but I second that emotion.
The world makes me want to die
It makes me want to put my foot so far up Reptilian ass that they taste shoe leather, except that they'd probably enjoy it.
the first time I heard hoohaw was when Henry Blake was giving shots to Radar's pets for rabies.
I haz a confused
god.
i leave this post to click on the bbc and see patrick stewart et alia protesting the british gov't reducing arts funding by a £100 million from a £450 million budget
planned parenthood cost us $11.4 million in 2009????
<bangs head over and over and over on table>
lizzie why did you leave???
Because the University of Texas at Austin were suitably impressed by my degree from Oxford that they threw money at me . I am always threatening to return and MrLimeylizzie gets such a sad so I stay.
"i leave this post to click on the bbc and see patrick stewart et alia protesting the british gov't reducing arts funding by a £100 million from a £450 million budget "
Nothing against Planned Parenthood, but Patrick Stewart's speaking voice is worth at least that much.
The Dems caved and there's a deal, sans the riders in the vaginal stream…
I was really cheering for a shutdown, but then I've been cheering for that since the Dems caved on the tax cuts in January…
The Tuskeegee experiment should now be conducted on all teabaggers. Or maybe it already has. Syphilitic holes in their brains would explain a lot.
I'd say "women should go on strike, withhold sex from Republican partners" but Republicans are all closet homosexuals anyway, so it wouldn't help anything.
I have never knowlingly fucked a Republican.
For those keeping score at home in re the video, in order of appearance:
Yes
Yes
No
No
Yes
Maybe
Yes
Yes
Yes (and twice on Sundays)
Absolutely, I remember when abortions were not legal so people who could pay had real doctors do it safely and poor women or scared girls tried to do it themselves, have friends "help" or find some "doctor" to botch their abortion and kill them.
I think it is because defunding Planned Parenthood creates the jobs that the Gop says they are all about. I mean , this is all about smaller less personally intrusive Government and Jobs, right, right,??. some teabagger freshman republican said so and I believe.
Why not shut down the Pentegon and the Congressional salaries?
Republicans: keep your Boehner out of my vagina.
I can understand being preoccupied with vaginas, but could never be a Republican because they seem just as preoccupied with dicks and assholes, too. Speaking of dicks and assholes: ………………………………………..
(Insert Rightard Name Here)
"And then we would paint on John Boehner’s beautiful dapper suit"
I read this as "John Boehner's beautiful diaper suit".
Is there another way to read that?
Fuck you Wonkette, if Larry Craig was still in the Senate he'd have a thing or two to say about your utterly baseless comments. Oh..
If Lindsay Graham…dang it.
If David Drier…oh shit, I give up.
" I don't know how to put this but I'm kind of a big deal."
"So why don't we go into this bedroom and commit some _____sexual acts. I think you'll find you like it".
WernerHeisenberg.com?
Wow. You've got a really well-defined position. Where'd you find the time?
Eeew–that redirects to "scientificbible.com," which has a sort of Timecube vibe…Do Not Want!
wow. I thought you were joking. And, there's not a single link on that page — block quote upon block quote. It's as though the author doesn't know what the "h" in "http" stands for.
Recently, one of those "pocket constitutions" found its way into our house. There is this whole preface section, which has nothing to do with the Constitution. The first section: "Observing the Hand of Providence", in which the author tries to make the case that the US Constitution is the third in a series that began with the Old Testament and the New Testament. Do not want, indeed.
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