Responding to criticism that the birth certificate he released Monday was unofficial and easily forged, probable illegal Kenyan Donald Trump released a whole new document yesterday, one that he says is the real official document this time. But why does Trump have so many birth certificates? Will he release yet another new one tomorrow? Where are all these “old” documents coming from anyway? The more Trump denies he’s a secret Muslim African terrorist, the more it seems like he is. And there are still more questions raised by this particular document. Why doesn’t his mother’s name match up with the first one he released? And, most important of all, why does this one refer to him as a “child,” when he’s clearly a man in his sixties?
On the first document Trump put out, his parents are listed as “Mr. and Mrs. Fred C. Trump.” Yet on this one, his father is “Fred C. Trump” and his mother is “Mary Mac Leod.” Why did his mother’s name change from being the same as his father’s to this “Mary Mac Leod” person? Furthermore, why does Wikipedia list Trump’s mother’s name as “Mary Anne MacLeod,” which is surely a third person entirely? This Mary person is said to be an immigrant, mind you, from Scotland, which is a foreign country.
The image came with an accompanying memo from a member of Trump’s staff.
“A ‘birth certificate’ and a ‘certificate of live birth’ are in no way the same thing, even though in some cases they use some of the same words,” wrote Trump staffer Thuy Colayco in a message to ABC News. “One officially confirms and records a newborn child’s identity and details of his or her birth, while the other only confirms that someone reported the birth of a child. Also, a ‘certificate of live birth’ is very easy to get because the standards are much lower, while a ‘birth certificate’ is only gotten through a long and detailed process wherein identity must be proved beyond any doubt. If you had only a certificate of live birth, you would not be able to get a proper passport from the Post Office or a driver’s license from the Department of Motor Vehicles. Therefore, there is very significant difference between a ‘certificate of live birth’ and a ‘birth certificate’ and one should never be confused with the other.”
You know, most Americans (a.k.a. the real ones) don’t feel the need to issue a new birth certificate to the media every day of the week to prove they aren’t Kenyan, and they certainly don’t hire people to send out long memos explaining why it’s complicated but totally normal to have so many alleged birth certificates on hand. Something fishy is going on here. [ABC News]
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There you go again, using those "words" to "define" things.
"things"
I think this confirms what everyone already knew. That Donald Trump is a total bastard.
A true horse's ass. Except for a horse's ass has better hair.
I've long felt his elaborately coiffed hair-don't is covering a set of three 6's.
I thought his mother was a Muppet.
And his father smelt of elderberries.
Oprah's last show is in May. I just read that she wants to dedicate that last show to giving Donald a makeover. This is how she wants to end her show? It's being called "groundbreaking, historical television" Giving that crap weasel a haircut isn't "gripping television"
I'm going to get a bikini wax. I wonder if the 60 Minutes crew will show up?
If by "60 minutes crew" you mean "old guy using his camera phone", then yes I will. I mean they will.
I call Producer!
I call fluffer!
A lot of people get waxed when their relatives come to visit.
Thanks for reminding me. Exactly 12 hours until Nancy's plane lands here. I couldn't be more miserable right now. Is it Monday yet? Has she left? Has anyone seen my purse? I'm half expecting to be found in a tub filled with ice cubes and a freaking kidney missing.
I'm guessing that they would. I know that most of Wonkette would
"Most"? You are precious! The poor dear would smell the cloud of boxed wine fumes and snark coming from blocks away. Sadly, most of us would just be saying the word "fap" instead the making the leap to the action itself…
If Donald enters the makeover and Justin Bieber exits, it will have been worth it.
Zod knows how this total makeover show made Harpo a billion dollar enterprise. Now she's taking her total makeover meme to make the total makeover network®.
I'd be careful if I was Donald, going to fervent Obama-supporter Oprah's hood. The "make-over" will be her straight up scalping that motherfucker, and peeling that bloody shit back in a live reveal before distributing chunks of it to her studio audience.
"And YOU get a chunk of Birther Scalp! And YOU get a chunk of Birther Scalp! It's one of my FAVORITE THINGS!!!!"
Perhaps you could sell Wonketteers square-inch pieces of the "waxpaper." Note to Christine O'Donnell: Here's the ???? in your Profit syllogism.
What's truly unnerving is that there is likely an audience that takes this childish bullshit seriously.
I'm just about to the snapping point…I may be forced to declare a squirmish against Trump.
Oh, yeah, they take it seriously. See half the comments on Ben Smith's post, e.g.:
Wow! Doesn't anyone see what he [Trump] is doing? He has done exactly what Obama did – same level of documentation – and Politico fell for it hook, line and sinker! This is sweet!!! The guy is a genius, and if you don't see that, then we understand you didn't graduate without social promotion…LOLOLOLO!!
That is definitely not Kenyan hair.
Everyone knows he wears a hairpiece, but not everyone knows it is to HIDE HIS SOCIALIST KENYAN AFRO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If Donald Trump produced a new birth certificate every day for a year he would still be an asshole.
When it comes to Donald the Trump's live birth certificate, if it's not Scottish, it's crap.
You're fired. You're hired. You're fucked, you ocelot wigged assclown.
I didn't know that the Post Office was responsible for issuing passports… Somehow I assumed that the State Department (Hillary?) had some role in this.
There you go with your reality again. I assume the asshat is confused because some post offices also double as passport processing locations, but you are correct that the actual decision on the validity of your application is made by the State Departme.
The Donald is from Jamaica, mon.
Rastafari!
P.S. Unrelated to the Trumpster, and to bring something good to the thread:
Bob Marley, 1979 – No Woman, No Cry
~
"This Mary person is said to be an immigrant, mind you, from Scotland, which is a foreign country."
Trump is an anchor baby.
Terror baby more like it… have you seen that hair?
The illegal Scots call them "haggises". Trump is definitely a haggis.
Where is Trump's "Certificate of Live Hatching" as reptiles come from an egg??
I have a problem using the word "birth" to describe this creature's arrival on the planet.
Isn't the correct word "spawned?"
The Salmon-American community is offended that you would associate their beautiful life tradition with Donald Trump.
"Pooped", I think.
Thuy Colayco? Seriously? Got a birth certificate on ya, Thuy?
One zero seven zero on a motherfucking shill.
As they sow, so shall they reap. Where by the way is Oily Taint's birf certificate and is it even in English, or any known earth language?
It's in the original Klingon. When read aloud, it's actually quite moving.
There you go, assuming that Oily was birthed, when everyone knows she was the original chestbuster.
In America, you have birth certificate.
In Soviet Moldavia, BIRTH CERTIFICATE HAS YOU!
That can't be a real name anyway. It sounds more like something that can be cured with Mucinex.
mary mcleod? sounds like a european gold digging whore to me. the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree.
You called?
I always said that just because a pus-filled vaginal secretion has a heartbeat, and a wispy, gollum-like combover, doesn't mean you have to issue it a birth certificate.
But no, they wouldn't listen to me, and now we all must pay the price.
I would have downfisted you for the rest of the day, if 'twere possible, on the basis of "wispy gullum-ike combover" alone
That should be "gollum' I was laughing too hard to type.
Jeez … the man is too cheap to pay for a really good fake birth certificate…
Upon a closer inspection I found some disturbing revelations. The following words are on this document:
A) "Queens" this is printed on there 2 times. Is Trump double loyal to a monarchy?
B) "Jamaica" and "Jamaica Hospital" Need I say more?
C) "Scotland"
D) "Own Home"
Clearly he is NOT an american!!!!!!!
Mrs Fred C Trump is his mother and owned the gash that oozed him forth. He just wented a womb from Mary McLeod.
The font choice just screams "N*****!!11!"
I'm more interested in the documentation of his serial bankruptcies–like the one that allowed him to stiff his creditors but keep the Trump Princess.
Well, Trump was born in Jamaica according to both of the birth certificates he's released. Are we sure that he's not just passing?
I call: Not a Drop Rule!
A Lying Black in Name Only. ALBINO!!1!!!
The difference between a "birth certificate" and a "certificate of live birth" is exactly the difference between a "Wonkette editor" and an "editor of Wonkette."
IN OTHER WORDS, Obama is a crypto-Kenyan and Jack Stuef is a dirty ginger.
It depends on what your definition of "of" is.
Steuf is usurping Jim Newell's rightful place in the snarktheon.
That Donald Trump fellow sure knows how to earn some media. He is really good at it.
With a staff like this, no wonder Trump has to go on TV to audition for new people all the time.
That clearly is not Trump's long-form birth certificate. It's square. Long means greater in one dimension than another. Squares aren't long.
Where's the long-form birf certificate?
And no footprints. ARE WE SUPPOSED TO BELIEVE THE DONALD WAS BORN WITHOUT FEET??! FAKE!!1!!!
Fuck Trump, I want to see Newt's certificate, the original one from the hatchery.
Can I see that blown up? No— I mean really blown up, like ass-ploded!
Where are Huckabee's and Barbour's certificates of girth? Or maybe Bachmann's certificate of dearth?
I'd gladly pay to see Colin's certificate of Firth. Rowr.
HEY! YOU CAN"T DO THAT!!! ONLY WE CAN SAY THAT ABOUT THE MUSLIN NI… um FOREIGN FAKE PREZNIT GUY!!!
Yeah, me too. And I had no idea–that's so weird.
Today, we are all Kenyan usurpers.
McLeod? This may mean that Trump is related to a certain immortal Scotsman from the 15th century who talked like a Californian and was trained by an immortal Spaniard who talked like a Scot.
If that means 'there can be only one' Donald Trump, I'm frankly relieved.
The issuance of yet another birth certificate to the media raises more questions than it answers. It is now incumbent upon the country of Jamaica to clarify this issue once and for all by issuing a super-official, no holds barred, rasta certificate for Mr. Trump. Only then will he have my vote for President of the Hair Club for Men.
Coming up next:
The exact opposite of a "Whitey Tape."
We all now there has to be a video of The D going all Michael Richards-y…
I always imagined Trump's birth certificate would be classier. Gold leaf and pissing naked cherubs perhaps…
I had just hoped his birth certificate would reveal what his species was.
His staff can get that version to you later today.
That totally looks shopped. I can tell from the pustules.
A likely story. His parents were obviously Lizard People.
At what point does our POS media quit giggling and talking about; "I know the Donald, and he's great in person, but"..and just call this hustler what he is. Point, laugh, quit watching his lame ass show and move on. Assholes.
Alert me when he produces a death certificate. Until then these birth certificates are a painful reminder of his existence.
Hey, it's the thought that counts.
This birth certificate does confirm one thing: Donald Trump is so old, he was born when people were still using microfilm; and here I thought anyone born in that era was long dead by now. He must be a contemporary of John McCain.
Actually, the microfilm is a good point: Where's the real document?
Right. Where's his REAL birth certificate? Not some fake-o 'shopped picture of it. We need to see the paper, smell it, touch it, subject it to indignities.
Thanks, Donnie. Now where's the Death Certificate for the wombat on your head?
i say live by the sword, die by the sword mutherfucker…
Of course he got the first one at the flea market. THAT'S THE POINT, libtards!
I wanna know where is the footprint! My original long form Hospital Birth Certificate has my little footprint on it, so my parents would know they got the right baby. How can you know this is the right Donald Trump without the footprint! Footprint or GTFO, so-called "Donald Trump," if that is your name.
MacLeod ? that MacLeod?
he is a Highlander… this is an immortal conspiracy to take over USA
I thought his Dad was Mr. Ed, cause he is a horses ass.
"If you had only a certificate of live birth, you would not be able to get a proper passport from the Post Office or a driver’s license from the Department of Motor Vehicles. "
Uh, no.
When I was in high school, I wanted to get a passport. Unfortunately, my parents couldn't find my birth certificate. Also unfortunately, the District of Columbia and the hospital had ALL lost the records of my birth and the doctor was dead and his records were gone. I got my passport using a letter from our local Church saying that I was baptised there, along with a couple of letters from family friends saying they'd known me all my life. For my driver's licence, all I needed was one of my parents standing there with me vouching for my identity.
So, dude, try again on that one.
(When I was in my 30's, DC computerized records and discovered that I had, in fact, been born there. I know have five copies of my birth certificate squirreled away in various places in case DC loses me again.)
The rest were fired.
You know, that document is NOT a birth ceriticate. It is a Certificate of Birth, and not even a Certificate of Live Birth. Does that mean that Trump may not have been born live?
Birth libel!
Aha! Smoking Gun Time!!!!
Trump's mother was born in in SCOTLAND.
Donald Trump is an ANCHOR BABY and should be deported to Libya just like the Lockerbee terrorists were.
"But why does Trump have so many birth certificates? "
Like any good savior, he has been born again.
""Certificate of live birth"
Whenever I see this I think of guppies or kittens.
Donald Trump may be the only newborn in history to eat its parent, rather than the other way around.
Arizona has only ever issued me a certificate of live birth. I am going to go slap my mother for secretly giving birth to me in Kenya.
You know who else's birth certificate had a prominent Gothic font?
Goethe?
Alaric the First, Conquerer of Rome?
this is what i'm thinking. i too only have a 'certificate of live birth' and i have:
1. a driver's license
2. a us passport
3. a canadian passport
4. a voting card
5. three cats and they were the hardest to get.
Speak to me of these US & Canadian passports. How do I get one of them Canada City passports? My g-g-grandfather was Canadian, does that count?
my mom's canadian. don't know about grandparents (tho they are referenced on form…)? they revised citizenship rules a couple years back to allow canadian descendants to apply for dual citizenship. here's link and hoping you qualify:
http://www.cic.gc.ca/english/citizenship
Wait, is that a Trump Stamp on that document?
I thought that was John Boner.
One certificate is for his birth, the other for his resurrection after his crucifixion (by the liberal media, natch).
Alternatively:
One certificate is for his birth, the other for the birth of his hair.
Trump's mother was born in Scotland! Oh the delicious irony for MinuteMom ("Freedom Fighter") and other birthers who say Obama isn't eligible because his father was not born in America.
Trump's merely says it's a "Certificate of Birth Registration". That doesn't prove a thing. It only means someone told the "Bureau of Records and Statistics" that someone may have been born. Basically, it's not a "Birth Certificate"! And nowhere does it say it "serves as prima facie evidence of the fact of birth for any court proceeding"
But besides that, what is the difference between Obama's Certificate of LIve Birth — which proves nothing, according to birthers — and Trump's birf certificate. Trump's BC has incidental information about parents (age, birthplace, occupation) and name of attending physician. That's the thread on which Trump claims legitimacy, while claiming Obama is a fake citizen.
Maybe he's just not human at all. That mop on his head certainly isn't.
“A ‘birth certificate’ and a ‘certificate of live birth’ are in no way the same thing, even though in some cases they use some of the same words,” wrote Trump staffer Thuy Colayco in a message to ABC News. “One officially confirms and records a newborn child’s identity and details of his or her birth, while the other only confirms that someone reported the birth of a child. "
Details of the birth? Like what, part of the placenta? Perhaps a touching polaroid of Hairpiece ripping his gargantuan head through his mama's vagina?
This latest document looks like an old diazo blueprint negative contact-print, like my old 1968 college transcript.
You'd think a guy as important as Trump could get a fresh, positive snapshot from the original records.
Just sayin'
In the "Art of the Birth," the Donald explained that his old man did a leveraged buyout of Mary McLeod that left him a million dollars in debt before bronzing the baby shoes.
Which means we must take his head, and that dreadful thing living upon it.
What if Trump is really a paid Dem shill to make Obama look good… and to make a mockery of the whole birfer thing? Then what?!
I think Stuef got honorary ginger status. Give us the real gingers Layne!
This obviously calls for the long form ginger certificate.
DONALD TRUMP IS A RADICAL MUSLIM ISLAMIC KENYAN TERRORIST WHO IS A SECRET MOLE SPY PLANT OPERATIVE AGENT OF THE KENYAN RADICAL MUSLIM ISLAMIC FACTION ARMY (KRMIFA), AND HE IS OUT TO DESTROY AMERICA AND DESTROY DEMOCRACY, AND AS SOON AS HE IS ELECTED PRESIDENT, HE WILL ENACT RADICAL MUSLIM ISLAMIC TERRORISM POLICIES THAT WILL DESTROY AMERICA AND KILL ALL AMERICANS AND REDUCE AMERICA TO ASHES. DONALD TRUMP IS A LEADING MEMBER OF KRMIFA! HE IS THE DEVIL! HE IS KENYAN. HE IS MUSLIM.
Trump 2012!
http://www.newshounds.us/2011/03/29/lewis_black_t…
It doesn't get any better than this…
So Trump's spokesman confirms that a real, official birth certificate is required to get a passport or driver's license. Since Barry has traveled in and out of the country, I assume he has a passport. Since Barry drives a car, I assume he has a driver's license. Therefore, Mr. Trump has provided sufficient proof, through his spokesman, that Barry indeed has a brith certificate.
Mr. SmartyPantZ: Just see where all that libural "logic" gets you!
At least you get to run fast. A skill which will come in handy after you delete all of those files.
Interesting item in box 15 (half-way down right hand side):
Birth Canal: Anal
Clearly this proves that Malcolm X was really Donald Trumps father.
Or Jimi Hendrix…
How the hell did that Kenyan get a U.S. Passport?
What kind of name is Thuy Colayco? Where's his birth certificate?
I wanted to watch Trumps show so I could see Meatloaf and Gary Busey out do each other but, why shouldI give Trump the ratings?
Inquiring Fucktards want to know.
Dave Letterman claims that The Donald's hair was made in the Philippines. If that is true, DT could claim Filipino citizenship, which would be OK because the Philippines are a Former Possession of the Amurican Empire.
Another immigrant success story.
There is live person one and another for the hair. He just mixed it up with another one for the asshole.
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