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  • The War on Normal People (sorry, “Bolshie bastards”) started in Wisconsin, but it has quickly spread to every corner of our sad Union. And now even the fabled ice colony of Alaska — long known for its warring tribes of barbarian grifters and embarrassing televised dance rituals — has been asked to obediently swallow this Big Gulp of corn syrup Koch nectar. The bill’s sponsor claims that stripping public employees of collective bargaining rights will save Alaska lots of money and protect rich people from poor people, just like in Wisconsin! But will the coward Democrats run away if this legislation gains momentum? “If the Democrats flee here … we’ll have to go to Canada,” according to the House minority whip, State Rep. Berta Gardner (D-Anchorage). Haha, only if you aren’t abducted by a snowmobile monster (Todd Palin) first! [CNN]
  • An American F-15E Strike Eagle jet crashed in Libya after an equipment malfunction. Don’t worry though, the two pilots ejected and are safe! (See? This is why we need that new F-69.) [AP]
  • Meanwhile, in Yemen: President Ali Abdullah Saleh warns that “a coup against his rule” will lead to civil war. [BBC]
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