It all makes sense now! Uhh, sorry. [YouTube]
NUCLEAR BOY
March 18, 2011
Political Wire
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Authors
Rebecca Schoenkopf (421)
Kirsten Boyd Johnson (927)
Sulagna Misra (4)
Kris E. Benson (11)
Liz Colville (170)
John Schoenkopf (7)
Jim Newell (5640)
Josh Fruhlinger (646)
Erik Jay (27)
Blair Burke (181)
{ 154 comments }
Nuclear Boy has the "green apple splatters" and we're all gonna pay for it. Those nuclear air biscuits aren't helping.
Whoever smelt it dealt it.
Nuclear Boy will make a great cartoon series. And he'll probably have a lot worse than a stomach ache!
I'm down with that, as long as they use this power pop classic as the theme song.
Good one! Here's one of my power pop favorites: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VfhwVbgr7v4
I AM afraid of poop flying right at me!
Do Not Trust the Sniffer Man!GOD DAMN The Sniffer Man!
Wow, I can still edit this comment 20 hours later.
Herbert Grönemeyer – Alkohol
~
Japan's Saturday morning cartoons are fuuuucked up.
Yeah, they're pretty crappy.
Hey, just be happy this one didn't have tentacles.
Now if we could just get the cartoonist to explain the teabaggers to us.
Nuclear boy is David Vitter?
Did David Vitter make this ocular holocaust?
So… Shit?
First Nuclear boy was all Santorum, but then he got a little Vitter.
Can I nominate this for the "Best Picture" Oscar?
Not while "Black Swan" is still being shown somewhere.
Oh, it's not? All-righty then!
Meanwhile, America' s "Nuculer" Boy pooped on everything for 8 years (and it still stinks).
Succinct!
Is it pronounced Nuclear or Nukular?
That was Bush league. Or was it the Shrubjunctive?
And a tsunami is a cartoon about bukakke? My Japanese good not so
GODZILLA BUKAKKE!
You forgot NSFW!!!
But I can understand your excitement.
My tsunami of enthusiasm aside, it is SFW!
(Except for the word bukkake, maybe…)
Obviously you've never played "Hide the Tsunami".
MIT's new on-line course materials include a whole series of flatulence and excreta-based nuclear engineering tutorials.
Still more intelligent and less patronizing than CNN.
Well, CNN's ex-royal-watcher Richard Quest hasn't weighed in on this topic yet, so there's still hope for a mature, science-based analysis.
That would take all the fun out of my Saturday Morning Cartoon Lineup.
I got the poopie on me!!!!
Diarrhea is hereditary…it runs in your genes.
I see what you did….he he he he
See? The Japanese are praying for Nuclear Boy! Take that, beck!
While the Chinese are praying for Hu Flung Dung.
Me irradiate you long time.
I voted you down for making me laugh and feel guilty.
When does Spielberg turn this into a feature length movie?
This shit has "Michael Bay remake of 'Two Girls, One Cup'" smeared all over it.
Oh Great. Just another thing for me to fear. Did the republitards make this fear mongering poop poopaganda?
How do they fit all that poopaganda into a teabag?
Never fear, littel Japanese children: we're *all* afraid of poo flying right at us.
Yeah, so now a whole bunch of Japanese children are afraid to go poo. How is that going to help things?
Quite informing in a poop like fashion. I often watch cartoons where the star is shitty.
Wait, was Jack the middle doctor?
Yes, well, he told this woman he met that he was a doctor, but then things got a little out of hand.
Now he's a nuk-u-lar proctologist!
The first doctor was Newell.
I made 2 min, although I downloaded it in case I want to see the ending sometime. I'll file it under "Bizarre."
Nuclear Boy is the new Tub Girl.
Thanks – I didn't know this thing existed. Now I do.
Needs more Pedobear…
He's a little busy offering Imodium iodide suppositories to Japanese school kids at the moment.
Any kid that can relate to that weird ass cartoon could give a rats ass about a nuclear reactor….just saying
Next: How the no-fly zone is keeping Libya Boy from projectile vomiting all over Israel.
The final Jeopardy answer: I can't hold my poo any longer
The question: What's is the number one campaign slogan for Vitter – Bachmann, 2012?
And I thought our 80s Schoolhouse Rock cartoons were bizarre. Nuclear Boy and his stinky poo are the new "Just a Bill".
reminded me of the "Volcano" "duck and cover" instructional film in "South Park". "If hot lava is coming your way, just 'duck and cover'!" The problem is that South Park's film was a parody, and this is for real.
If Nuclear Boy never poos, does he eventually explode?
Everyone poops.
Yes, just like a dream deferred…
Mmm, nuclear santorum…
He has a meltdown.
I really can't form an opinion on the accuracy of this explanation of the nuclear disaster until Richard Cohen has a chance to analyze it in his next column. He knows all about poop.
Domo origatto Nuclear Boy. Now I know everything I ever wanted to know about nuclear shit.
I thought 'Po' was the symbol for polonium, but apparently it stands for 'poo'.
I couldn't watch at "work" (I assume its called that ironically). Did the shit hit the fan?
Oops, you all got a little troll poo flung your way. Thumbs up (your butts, hold that stuff in, please)!
This Nuclear Boy is quite reassuring.
Nuclear radiation is a lot like explosive diarrhea.
And the chances of explosive diarrhea happening to any one person, at any time is actually, quite small.
Unless, of course, you are sick. Then GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE WAY…
Is there anything that can’t be explained to a child in terms of poo?
credit default swaps? why we went to war in iraq? hey you're right!
'daddy, what are credit default swaps?'
'bullshit.'
'and why did we go to war in iraq?'
'bullshit.'
'thanks daddy. you're the greatest.'
'bullshit.'
After watching that whole thing, I now understand CONFUSE FISH.
Also, too, banjo?
Jay Sherman: It stinks!
I can say for sure that in clear contradistinction from Nuclear Boy there, everyone's going to have a bad day if I don't poo.
A Fun Japanese Cartoon To Explain the Nuclear Holocaust To Your Kids
Bullshit! Akira, Fist of the North Star, or nothing!
I'm pretty sure that video just activated my subconscious CIA sleeper-agent training.
Well, this explains Michelle Bachmann's recent pronouncements. Her messaging consultants have been on assignment in Fukushima Prefecture.
Glow-in-the-dark-for-a-thousand-years POO
And I don't think I trust Mr. Sniffer-Man.
Jesus Christ, now an entire generation of Japanese kids are going to develop Rhypophobia.
Haven't they already been dealing with that for generations, ergo, stuff like this inane video and books like "Everybody Poops"?
This would be an absolutely perfect educational piece on the nuculars for the FoxNews viewers if it was dubbed.
overdubbed by shitty Canadian voice actors. then they can show it on adult swim so Americans can think they're cultured.
I think it could be improved by adding the ukulele and a toilet.
And what couldn't, really?
Totoro poops in your garden and everybody wants your tomatoes. Nuclear Boy poops in your garden and it's "please leave this area for one thousand years."
"Can you believe this guy's Three Mile Taint."
If only Carter had used this tool during the 3-mile Island pop attack. It could have helped explain the hostages too.
Is there anything that the Japanese can't do better than Americans?
Gain weight?
Next on Youtube: Four Reactors, One Cup
…kinda like those old "drug" commercials, except it is more like "this is your brain on radioactive isotope 235"
No shit. (pun intended) I felt high–or "something"–while watching that.
chernobyl boy looks like he might be special needs.
also npr is telling me the super moon is coming. this can't all be a coincidence.
Fallout Boy is not happy about this.
If US Americans did something like this, it would be called "Cheer for Hope" and be produced by Jerry Bruckheimer. Starring Zac Efron, the soundtrack would be written by Sting, Lady Gaga, and Justin Bieber. And there'd be a walk on by Bono, Richard Dreyfus, and Jennifer Love Hewitt around minute 46.
And no one would have any idea what the point was.
It would cost $47 million, and finish with a black, a white, a generic Asian, and a generic Hispanic holding hands.
And it would be released six months after the crisis had passed.
Particularly poignant for me because, at my neighborhood recreation center, when a kid or an old takes a shit in the pool, the staff refer to the chemical process they follow to clean the pool as "nuking it."
I'm surprised that they didn't show Nuclear Boy's pet, Snoopy Snoop Poop Dog; and they could get the Enema Man to help him.
I can't wait for the mangapoo.
Nice triple play.
Okay I am now convinced that the Japanese are stuck in the poop/fart development stage, hence their obsession with toilets and pre-adolescent girls.
TGFO
What explains the tentacle rape, though?
I don't want to think about it, there are still a couple of places I don't want to go.
RIP
Nuclear boy, won't you take me far away from the mucky-muck?
This new Adult Swim line-up is looking pretty good . . .
Does this mean that Spock shit himself to death in Wrath of Khan?
Once again, the Simpsons already did it.
If Nuclear Boy never poos, does Math Boy come and help him "work it out with a pencil?"
This is pretty gross. I expected the doctor in the white coat to get up on the box like head of the boy and piss on him to cool him off, which makes about as much sense as flying helicopters over the nuclear reactor and hoping that some of the water that it drops will go into the cracks and get to where it is needed. I'd say we were hours away from the announcement that the radioactive crap has been hurled up into the air and spewed all about.
Don't forget that the crap can all go to the bottom and get critical again, you think exploding poop is bad, wait until it reaches critical mass with no containment or coolent.
Nah. Too much boron, and probably too much fuel depletion, to sustain a chain reaction. The real "worst case" could be pretty fucking bad, but won't involve that.
Unless, of course, mistakes were made.
About zero chance of nuclear explosion. Atomic bombs need the fuel compressed for a short while to make them go critical enough for a big blast because all those little particles push each other so hard. But obviously there are other types of explosions possible, as shown in the multiple hydrogen gas explosions we've seen so far.
Mistakes were made in 3…2…1…
Nuclear Holocaust Cartoon has no ring to it whatsoever.
That was pretty good. Thanks.
Soon to be replaced by Spongebob Glowpants.
Man, they don't make nuke cartoons like they used to..
This one is pretty good too. Sad dog story, cop (Union) killing, and nuclear holocaust.
Well those were a couple of knee slappers to start the morning.
This thread was a pile of crap! I have never see such sophomoric, childish, puerile, offensive commenting. I though Wonketteers were much more mature and discriminating than that.
Way to go folks… I really loved it.
Fuck me, I just endured the Brooks/Dionne wankfest on All Things Considered. Seriously? Dionne *really* said "progressives" approve of this shit? What the fuck?
Hey NPR "libs" – there ain't no need to crawl on your knees up to the nearest GOP corporate dick and swallow the toxic slag; they're going to de-fund you anyway. Get some fucking balls/ovaries and maybe you can walk out the door with your dignity intact.
Assholes.
They should replace Cokie Roberts with Noam Chomsky asap.
Chomsky is brilliant, if a bit paranoid, but he puts me to sleep. Did this guy ever raise his voice? Ever?
I heard that too. No snark, just, I heard it too. Fuckers.
NPR – Nice Polite Republicans
One could only wish that nuclear waste was exactly like poop. Poop can be used as fertilizer after it is composted. Nuclear waste, not so much.
Off Topic: 'Super moon' to reach closest point for almost 20 years
Stargazers hope to see bigger and brighter moon but will have to look closely to detect 0.3% difference…
It is the first time since 19 January 1992 that the moon has come into such close proximity to the Earth. This type of full moon tends to bring a range of high and low tides, but experts said yesterday that there was nothing to worry about.
Insert Bill O'Reilly jokes here.
I remember that one was obscured by clouds for me, too. This time being obscured by a nuclear cloud promises to be awesome, however.
Bill O'Reilly, the Pope, and the Moon walk into a bar. The Moon spins O'Reilly around, pulls down his pants, and shoves a plutonium loofah up his ass. The Pope says "Explain that, motherfucker". The end.
Hey, you didn't specify good jokes.
It was tidally assume.
Do I gotta say it?
Tide comes in, tide goes out.
There.
Moon goes in, moon goes out. Who can explain it?
Fuckin' supermoon, how does it work?
Meh *shrug* I still like this better than Jeremy Piven.
Best episode of South Park ever.
The doctor keeping N-boy wet is a gaijin.
Yes, the Japanese have a weird habit of depicting people in graphics as looking like Westerners, even when presumably 99%+ of the real life people in the same situation are Japanese.
This cartoon is the product of 200 years of Japanese inbreeding. Although we could use that type of inbreeding in the South.
It's the weekend, and so I get to stop worrying about this disaster until Monday.
My spent nukular rods usually have a 1/2 life of say, 5 to 10 years in the sewer before they are magically treated and jettisoned out to sea.
If everything is to be viewed through the gastrointestinal metaphor, does this mean Scott Walker is a corn kernel?
I finally got around to seeing this now that I'm out of the office. My first thought was holy crap, I've never thought of my asperger's son as having nuclear analogy potential, but slam-bang what a great job of describing it.
And you better keep a diaper on my beloved boy, because that shit stinks, and it's nuclear-like.
Ok, so I'll just tell my kid "Don't worry, son, it's just a nuclear reactor gently farting in your face, not actually shitting on you. It's practically a kiss goodnight." Thanks, Japan!
Warren Christopher died.
"But it's not as terrible as it could be, because Vitter Boy wears a diaper. But Vitter Boy's poo is extra stinky, and no one knows how to clean up Vitter Boy's stinky diaper, so we must put more boron-medicine on him."
Nuclear Boy, I'm confused!
Why does this fish have three eyes?
And why is your shit glowing in the dark?
[snark off, momentarily]
The Daiichi workers who've stayed on at the plant during the absolute frightening hell it must be are heroes.
[snark on]
UK, US, & France now firing missiles on Libya.
Hey now, you're the first world
Get your war on!
Why doesn't that little man in Paris just step aside? Although, he does have a smokin' wife.
"The initial stage of the military operation will be run by France and Britain with significant American help, including radar planes, command and control, and precision-guided munitions, including cruise missiles and B-52 bombers, NATO officials said. American forces were expected to focus mostly on knocking out Libyan air defenses."
That last quote cost major dineros. I seriously doubt this operation would have been pulled off by France or England without our help. Is it gonna be worth it? Time will tell. (Obviously).
Still waiting for the Marines to land on "the shores of Tripoli."
Shitty Diaper/Palin 2012
So, the moral of the story is that nuclear power will be perfectly safe, as long as we can keep a boy alive and healthy for thousands of years, while making sure he never ever poops.
The statement that Americans avoid talking about race at all costs has definitely proved true in this case. I took a look at this throughout the day. The comments grew. 158 now. Not one makes note of two prominent issues in the cartoon. The visual of the "Sniffer Guy" and the first visual of the doctor.
Sniffer guy I'm not going to get into. I could make a lot of assumptions based on things I've read and been told. Probably best for a Japanese person to address that one. The doctor though, blew me away. Yet over 150 comments, apparently didn't cause anyone to blink. Consensus: yeah – doctor visual, A-okay.
Is it me or does Sniffer man look like Obama? Also it is ironic that I watched this on a laptop while sitting on a toilet.
I feel so much better now.
Thanks N-boy, I can put away the Iodine pills.
One another note I feel so educated about Nuclear Science now I may go into the field.
All nuclear boy wants to do is take a dump
Well, at least I know what Family Guy will be about next week.
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