- Japan raised the nuclear alert level at Fukushima from four to five on a seven-point international scale for atomic incidents, making this nightmare just two “points” away from Chernobyl! (That’s a nice way to imagine it, in “points.” Just like in College Basketball March Madness!) The head of the International Atomic Energy Agency referred to this awful disaster as a “race against the clock,” so that’s comforting. Since this tragedy began last Friday, 6,405 people have been reported dead and approximately 10,200 are still missing. Also, miserable weather and heavy snowfall has basically made Japan the saddest place on Earth. [BBC]
- The U.N. has approved a no-fly zone over Libya, and the bombings will probably begin any minute now, if they haven’t started already! Hooray for the benevolent Western Powers. [McClatchy]
- Former Haitian President Jean-Bertrand Aristide will return to Haiti today, after seven years in exile. The United States has objected to his return, claiming that Aristide’s “presence in Haiti could disrupt Sunday’s runoff vote that will decide Haiti’s next leader.” Haha, is it even possible for the United States to mind its own business? Or will Obama send his favorite diplomat Raymond Davis to sort things out? [CNN]
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Folks in the United Kingdom still have some issues with that Gawdaful guy in Libya…
But, but they're besties! He even sent them a plane once…
Bomb bomb bomb, bomb bomb Libya.
Bomb bomb bomb, bomb bomb Libya.
Kind of has a years-long, fruitless, multibillion-dollar ring to it.
The oil receipts will pay for the whole thing, that's the beauty part.
And we will doubtless be welcomed by the Libyans with showers of rose petals and open arms. It's also a great chance to send in some fundamentalist Xtians to gather converts, right?
So if Japan beats Chernobyl, who do they play in the next round?
Do they get a home game in Nagasaki?
A home meltdown, you mean.
Check your bracket – Three Mile Island is surging late, but Tokyo Electric is battling the Cinderella story of WHY DID WE BUILD A NUCLEAR PLANT ON FAULT LINE?! Strong recruiting this year.
Too bad the Deepwater Horizon peaked so early and only ended up with an NIT bid.
I think they face first timer Indian River out of New York, they beat Vermont Yankee in the play in game
Next they get to take on Earth's Molten Core, which should be blasting up any minute once those cores start melting down through everything gravity presents as an obstacle.
Also in very strong contention is one of the Koch Bros. entries – "a Georgia-Pacific paper mill on the Coffee Creek in Arkansas – owned by the billionaire Koch Brothers -emits 45 million gallons of paper mill waste including hazardous materials like ammonia, chloride, and mercury each day"
http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-31727_162-20043531-10…
A dark horse with strong backing.
Novaya Zemlya
Sovyet testings has made the island so radioactive it almost uninhabitable
Props to You Riley, for using Goya's Saturn Devours His Children. Imagine having that painting look at you in your dining room.
Yes, just as the anti-depressants I began taking last week began to kick in and I could face the morning without a straight edge razor blade in my hand, I open "My" the wonket for a chuckle and see this. Why do you hate me, Young Riley?
A word to the wise, from an old hand: you have to use plenty of alcohol with those anti-depressants. And, watch out, they'll make you fat, so you have to pretend to have ADD, so you can get prescription meth (thats what ritalin is, boys and girls) to keep the weight down, and keep you awake after 3 martinis. With the use of this regimen, you will find the Goya up there fucking hilarious.
Dining room? I put it in the nursery.
Dad?
Did Goya know Bill O'Reilly and use him as the model when painting Saturn?
I have a copy in my bedroom. What?
I had a psychotic ex whose favorite painting was that one. That probably should've been the first sign I was dating a succubus.
I dated a guy who had Guernica over his bed. Definitely explained all the crying (on his part) after the sex.
T
Also, miserable weather and heavy snowfall has basically made Japan the saddest place on Earth.
But Riley, we gave them the gift of Jack…doesn't that count for something?
P.S. Speaking of the devil…
~
What, no dick jokes? That radiation must really be getting to Young Mr. Steuf.
Sounds like a job interview to me.
Didn't a Godzilla movie start this way?
Helpless pitiful giant flails against forces he cannot see, much less understand.
He can destroy the world many times over, but saving it is beyond his ability to comprehend.
TGIF
I've said this before here; the Japanese are deeply weird, but really in a lovable way. It's heartbreaking what these people are enduring and the dignity with which they are coping should be a lesson to all.
"…should be a lesson to all. "
Like oh so many things… We so silly.
The way they treat their elderly and take care of them is what impresses me the most.
You're getting on in years, huh Barb?
Yes, I am 48. Wanna hear about what life was like when the mastodons pranced across the Earth? (aka, puberty for me)
Oh pish posh, that's not old. Forty-nine, now THAT's old.
Dances with Mastodons?
Oh, Jim.
George Takei just told me that they have this concept called "gama," which is kinda like stoicism, bearing suffering with patience and dignity. A concept completely unknown in the USA, of course. Spend any length of time abroad, and what really strikes you upon returning to the US is the incredible constant whining.
Stop whining about how whiny we are.
Stop whining about whining about how whiny we are.
See what I mean? This is exactly the kind of whining I was whining about.
Interestingly in a report from China on NPR this week the correspondent noted that in some instances the Chinese response to Japan's disaster has focused on the fact that in Japan, unlike China, there was no looting and profiteering after the quake. Some Chinese officials even publicly challenged their own people to learn from that example.
You call it looting, I call it "the invisible hand" of the free market.
On Fox, the comparison is made using Katrina, while running footage of colored folks, of course It's nauseating, the constant dog whistling.
Don't forget how the white folks in NO were "scavenging".
In the US we might be whiny but at least our officials don't try to get us to become better people by pointing to the example of others!
Coloreds loot, but every one else "scavenges" stuff in a crisis.
And THIS is why we can't have nice news.
"Haha, is it even possible for the United States to mind its own business?"
Wouldn't it be loverly?
The republitards really have a hard on for war. They are at their most orgasmic when the US is attacking other countries. National Pride and their general mean streak makes this a drug, for them, better than meth.
Except when they have to fight in them.
See the extensive list of GOPer Chickenhawks which would be most of them.
Of course they send the dredges of their society to be killed. They are so much better than the average bear that they couldn't possibly fight in a War for chrissake.
OTOH they do love their big guns…
$600 billion a year is plenty of trigger happy and/or bureaucracy.
Manchu, I don't have a dick, but this comment gave me a boner.
I think a lot of the so-called "Young Guns" are amped up on something. Look at their eyes. That Paul Ryan guy? Cracked out. Michelle Bachmann? Would explain both the crazy eyes and the delusions of grandeur. Plus most of them represent high meth usage districts in the methiest states.
That would sure explain the meth eyes of Bachmann and Angle, but not the teeth. Unless they come out at night, that is.
And they are at their most repulsively dangerous when they have no clear enemy–this is when they start making them up.
They are refighting the Civil War, trying to regain their lost honor.
Jean-Bertrand Aristide "Fuck, give me another shot, I can't break it any more than Gaia already has"
I sense a Death Match between Baby Doc and Aristide will be coming to a pay-per-view channel near us soon!
The only loser will be the Haitian people if either of those bastards survives.
When the UN declares a No Fly Zone over Sarah Palin's house, I'll get excited.
Too late, there are flies all over that shit. They love dried moose cooze.
Sadly, I doubt she's home.
Why can't France take care of the Gaddafi's freak show with food. With enough butter and deep fried brilliance he'll die of heart disease. This technique world for us in 2010 on the evil Haley the Barber…
What?
The fucker is still alive? Ahh Hell.
Yeah, but the French are all skinny and seem to live forever. Something to do with drinking red wine and chain-smoking Gauloise.
They'll fly down there and depress Gadfly to death. "Give up Muommar (takes a drag from that awful French cig) it is meaningless. It is all a waste of time. There is no escape."
Apologiez for not using ze sturreoteepicul FRANCH accent.
The bourgeoise businessman wants his packages on time. Time, what is time? Does anybody really know what time it is? Does anyone really care? I can't imagine why.
I might get burned up by the
Daiichi reactor #4sunbut I've had my fun.
Not any more.
Met a young woman from Paris, early 20's.
She had more belly fat than myself, a American.
#Winning
If the Arab League is ok with taking out Gudduffy, shouldn't someone point out that they have huge, well funded armies, uh..right next door.. in Egypt and in Algeria? Armies paid for by the U.S. of America?
I wondered the same thing. Here's a little something about it http://andrewsullivan.theatlantic.com/the_daily_d…
Those were gifts. It's bad form to tell the recipient of a gift what they must do with it, even worse form to take it back.
Yes, but all those super high-tech jet fighters are there for defense (from Bahraini protesters), not to back-up international commitments or anything.
US America, the Gladys Kravitz of the world.
Abnah! ABnah!
Ah yes, I remember when Aristide got illegally forced out by a US-backed coup that showed the Bush administration decided to go back to the Cold War policy of getting rid of democratically elected leaders they didn't like; they also tried it in Venezuela but it didn't work there. Good times.
Aristide was endangering USA interest in the two largest Hatian exports, baseballs and corpses (cadavers to you medical students).
The Venezuelan failure is one reason for the demonization of Chavez. But we did rig the Mexican Election and get Calderon. And look out how well that's worked out!
Ingrate!
I love how our media always refers to Chavez as a dictator. Um, no, he's been legitimately democratically elected several times; just because the guy's a demagogue and we don't like him doesn't change the fact that he's not a dictator.
Well, Ann Coulter says that radiation is good for you (which would explain a lot) so no problemo. West coasters can plan to bbq their irradiated meat under the radiation cloud this weekend. Save money on bronzers. What's J. Bone up to Sat? He should fly out.
Considering that shrew could render anything tube shaped lifeless, maybe she should do us all a favor and go visit Fukushima.
Coulter should have her thyroid checked. Either she's sporting a goiter or it is the Adam's apple I suspected.
Radiation is good for you!? Ann, I know you're probably hoping that having a glowing vajayjay is the vajazzle that will finally get you a date with a man who doesn't live in his mom's basement but sadly, no, not even that is going to do it.
That tired old leather skirt she wears for every TV appearance is really a lead apron she got from her vet during her last x-ray session for hip dysplasia.
Well that's part of the beauty of all this – no need to bbq. The meat's already been nuked.
Propaganda usually has a glimmer of truth to it.
Study done on 70,000. workers at Baltimore shipyards showed workers exposed to LOW LEVELS of radioactivity lived longer.
Did not release study because they were afraid of idiots like Man Coulter misinterpreting the results…
It sounds like France and the Brits are going to start the bombing of Libya soon. The Neocons must be so disappointed that we’re not bombing.
Yet.
I thought Jack was the first person evacuated from the Japan? He's is the most stellar and thoughtful and brilliant and is our State Department's first priority.
Jack being there is showing his support. My family did something similar in the 60's when we vacationed in Vietnam. Beautiful country.
My brother brought back a poster from his 2-tour "vacation" in Bien Hoa that said
"Join the Air Force.
See the world,
meet exotic people
and kill them."
Good times.
Please tell me that this "point" thing is in logarithmic units.
Ha ha. You used the word "logarithmic" in regard to a stat being doled out via the media. LOL
Are you kidding? I'm surprised it's in numbers. I fully expected a color-coded "Homeland Nookyooler Alert" chart.
This is good news for John Bolton.
But an intervention in Libya would divert resources from that which the Japanese earthquake proves we must do, invade Iran.
Libya before Iran, like foreplay before sex.
Oh, wait John Bolton – like he knows anything about sex, let alone foreplay. Try this instead – like the appetizer before the main course.
Sarah Palin's mouth is always two points away from Chernobyl…
That makes sense; whenever she talks I get nausea, vomiting and diarrhea.
John McCain would've invaded Libya three times by now, had he been elected. Maybe Egypt and Tunisia, too. Hell, we'd be selling Egg McMuffins to all of North Africa already.
Mmmmmmmm Bacon, Egg & Cheese McGriddle…..It's so wrong, but tastes so right.
Damn you. That made me hungry.
If we're getting eaten by the beast, doesn't that mean our torment will eventually end?
See, people, I told you. Hell is not forever. And they have waaaay better music.
I think they have instant reincarnation, otherwise it's off to yet another hell in some other plane, or maybe, if you were good while you burned, you go to hell-heaven.
The whole thing never made much sense to me.
Hell is an endless loop of Barry Manilow music and a jukebox full of Chuck Mangione music and no slot to put the quarter.
Thanks for clearing that up, I thought it was a picture of:
1) alice cooper
2) Disney's new crossover Broadway hit "The Lion King Zombie"
Well I guess either of these could be hell.
Just need to hold out for a little over two months. Things should start to clear up on May 21…
"clear up" "clear out" "tomato" "tamahto"
But sending the modern Italian army in would ensure that they'd lose.
I actually looked it up on wiki – if they're to be believed, Italy *leases* their fighter jets. I'm with FW – Egypt and the Saudis have a metric fuckton of deadly US-made weaponry; let 'em get funky with it.
And what with the mileage restrictions and the charges for dents and damage to the paint job, you don't want to get messed up in heavy traffic…
Teapublicans don't get off on surrogates….
But it would be a masterpiece of sex and surrealism.
Is Libya where the Liberals is from?
If so. go ahead and bomb it.
Sincerely,
Sarah
…except now Libya has declared an "immediate ceasefire"
do we get to bomb them anyway?
No. But we should blame someone.
Worked for Saddam. He let in the inspectors and we said, oh hell he must be hiding something anyway. SHOCK AND AWE BABY.
I have this eerie deja-vu feeling about Libya. No, not the Afghanistan Iraq deja-vu. I can't help but feel this fight in Libya is today's Spanish Civil War and if don't do something, we will look back on our failure the same way.
High level govt officials have come over to the rebels' side and it seems like they have a semblance of an idea of a govt to replace the crazy guy. While Arab countries stand by and do nothing, this is one time when, as in Spain, the calvary actually could ride in, kill off the baddies and say, "Shucks, ma'am, it weren't nothin' " before riding into the sunset.
I think it has the potential to up our cred in the new Egypt and Tunisia.
The Libyans are fighting for and defending their country. We're offering some assistance. Neocons aren't happy unless we invade geographical areas and start trying to convince people it's their country and they should want to defend it.
I hope they start today and I hope the first French bomb is dropped on top of that mass killer who blew up the jet over Lockerby then got sprung by the Brits in exchange for oil.
Oh also: Khadafy couldn't find anyone to fight for him, so he paid unemployed "soldiers" from the Lord's Resistance Army and other murderous thugs from sub saharan Africa to come kill the Libyans.
We fucked up in Spain, Iran, Algeria, Viet Nam, Afghanistan, Iraq and, of course, virtually every country south of us. Clinton and Wesley Clark did a decent thing in Kosovo. Maybe with a Democrat in the WH we could do a decent thing here.
Make a movie about it and then cast George Clooney as the brilliant commander who comes in and saves everybody and Angelina Jolie as the mysterious–is she friend or foe?–love interest. Make America look heroic on screen. Oh, and cast someone like Jeff Goldblum as the NPR reporter who plays the "For whom the Bell Tolls" heroic martyr who dies just as the senate votes to send NPR no public funding, ever. Box office alone should pay for the cost of the bombs, and everybody wins.
"then got sprung by the Brits in exchange for oil"
That's a remarkably unilateral interpretation of what occurred.
Fie on you! I was in the midst of editing when you replied and cut me off at the pass (in cowboy movie parlance). I meant to say a sweet deal on sweet crude for BP.
Sorry, DustBowl. I wasn't even thinking of you representing it that way – more just that's how the msm is handling it.
Khadafy – or one of his spokesdudes – denounced reports that there may be efforts to arm the rebels: "Giving them weapons will mean that Libyans would be killing Libyans." Better to bus in mercenaries to do it…
I seem to recall guys like you saying Somalia would be simple too.
moar upfist plz.
I have a feeling the IRA assistance toward Libyan terrorism is a factor I have yet to see anyone consider in that whole Lockerbie mess.
When the Peter Kings of this congress are embracing them and NY/Mass Americans who have never set a fucking foot in the Old Sod and Troobles, however they say trouble in Ireland, are just shit they've seen on movies, are sending them money and no one bothered to mention Khadafy gave them beaucoup weapons and IRA assholes were photographed by satellite, training in the Libyan desert.
The assistance went both ways, methinks. I've no use for any of them. What–if the bomber is a white guy with a cool accent, you're less dead?
The whole mess stinks, but I happen to think the IRA helping Libya pull some of those attacks factored into the blind eye the U.K. gave them as soon as profit was involved.
When I voted for Prez it wasn't a pie in the sky thing. I thought "who likes bombing folks the least." And I lose….
"Also, miserable weather and heavy snowfall has basically made Japan the saddest place on Earth."
You've never been to Arizona, have you, Riley?
But it's a dry heat!
Having been in Arizona, and finding that the dryness makes my skin just as itchy and crackly as the dry winter air even though it's warm, I've never understood how that's meant to be a positive.
Having grown up in the Valley of the Sun (lovely Phoenix), and then having escaped to actual civilization, I have to say that I miss the heat. And the sun shining most days, unlike the swampy miasma of DC, where you can't really tell if its cloudy or not.
The United States may not be as committed to foreign aid as some other countries, but if that aid is in the form of dropping bombs from planes, we are always willing to help.
Dem's good Made in 'Merica bombs, use once-all gone, need more now!
cost plus contract, drop some more, most miss anyway.
Western Forces don't have a stellar record of achievement when it comes to bombing Libya. I recall Ronnie Numbnut's massive fuck-up a short few years ago. He managed to kill an infant or two. Can't get much more "innocent civilian" than that. Libya is as flat and open as a fucking pool table, fer Chrissakes. If this has to be done, no more fuck-ups, pleeze!
Does it have to be done? Wouldn't it be soooooooooo much better to send Sarah Palin to Libya on a diplomatic mission. A few minuted of her screeching voice and Qaddafi would quit. But then, we would be held responsible for torturing the Qaddafi.
Not sure the Treasury would pay her customary fee: Ass, grass or cash; the Palinator doesn't screech for free!
Good point. I guess you'll have to screw her. For America, Tommy. You can do it. Be brave.
Some think a self-respecting man wouldn't be able to get it up for such a vapid cunt. These simpletons have obviously never heard of a good old fashioned Hate Fuck.
"Haha, is it even possible for the United States to mind its own business?"
Not to sound all bolshevik or anything but isn't paying attention to the economic/humanitarian disaster/sacks of burning poop that are right on your doorstep kind of minding your own business in a mature rational self-interest kind of way?
"accident with wider consequences" that sounds much better than "nuclear winter" doesn't it? Accident with wider consequences almost sounds like when a condom breaks.
(FYI: his name is Quinn)
The Mighty Quinn?
I guess this means I have to go back and read Dan Muphy's long article in the CS Monitor Weekly about the Libyan uprising before I shoot off my mouth again. I'd skipped it because things had turned against the rebels and it made me said.
I so wish the rebels would leftist and I could cheer on our troops as if I were sending off the Lincoln Brigade to Spain.
Finally I can start wearing my Spinal Tap kicking Mummar Gaddafi in the butt t shirt again! Lets hope Iran starts some shit so I can bust out the Ayatollah Assahola one too.
Stay tuned to Barahin, Iran about to mix it up with the Saudis, That gonna be some good shit!
Haiti did such a wonderful job in the last national election that nothing Aristide could do would make this one any worse.
I was there when Aristide returned, in 1994, flown into the presidential palace on a U.S. military helicopter. What a hopeful moment… what a long time ago…..
The nation of Egypt, a NATO affiliate, has a superb air force with more than two hundred F-16s, they could wipe out the entire Libyan air force in four hours with minimal losses.
Yes…but from what I read, our Arab partners are only going to take a "support" role. Fuck that…they should be leading the parade.
Interesting how "Bin Laden" has let all these events pass by without comment. It's like he's, I don't know, dead to the world or something…
He's not dead…he's just resting
He's pining for the fjords.
More likely pining for the porausjäte.
Beautiful plumage…
Nah – he's just not a snowbilly attention whore.
I gave it a six because it had a good beat and was easy to dance to.
"Haha, is it even possible for the United States to mind its own business?"
What are you a communist Muslim?
Ok everybody, I have a new idea for one of those rubber activist/cause bracelet thing-ys. It will have the letters: WWRRD. (What Would Ronnie Raygun Do). It will be fabulous and also remind us of all the shit that human turn brought upon the US.
Who's in?
Woot! Get your war on!
Not to put a silver lining on this Japan thing…because it's really not, but at least all those missing and dead now won't have to die slowly from radiation sickness and the multiple cancers it will cause. Like I said – not really much of a silver lining.
Radiation, the gift that keeps on giving
Even worse.
But there's great things on TV; The Sound of Music twice an hour, and Jaws 1, 2, and 3…
If the Japanese authorities are admitting that its a 5, that means its at least an 8, on the 7 point scale.
That's exactly why I almost spit out my toaster scramble when I read that.
True, they are too humble…
More like, "Don't worry, its only a cold sore."
The sadness has been carried by the wind over the Pacific. Even Ohio isn't safe.
Now that he's won, it looks like Gaddafi is giving up. Tricky bastard.
For everyone's misgivings about what's going on in Libya, you have a television. That appliance is the reason you know about what's going on there. But that teevee won't solve their problems. It only shows them to you. Take away your teevee, and we're largely ignorant of their suffering.
It is not our responsibility to put out fires anymore. Not without permission, anyway. We're not a hero. We're a troll. A huge fucking troll with massive arms, no brain, and a big goddamn club. It is time for us to regain our brain, carry this big club — and speak softly, for a change.
Thank you, UN and Arab League, for finally giving us permission to add scrutiny to Khaddafi. In the wake of the Security Council's vote, the people in Benghazi about erupted into a fuck-fest of joy and giddiness. That's an example of how powerful the rule of law can be.
This is truly madness.
No way is Japan going to beat Duke…
The winner will go to the final against a meltdown to be determined later.
Can't some Republican get caught in a hotel room dressed as Martha Washington, with three hookers and a duck so it can be a regular Friday on teh Wonkette?
This is just too damn depressing for words. I'm going back to bed.
How da radiation git dere? How dit git dere?
Okay, yeah, I got nothing.
Neither did O'Reilly.
Jonah Goldberg thinks that this is a really bad time to be talking about nuclear policy and the dangers of radiation.
Next week, the Greater Antilles League will vote to ask for a US No-Fly Zone over Haiti.
Picture do-over: (apologies for re-posting): http://www.flickr.com/photos/undeterredbyreality/…
Quite soon, the media and governments
will be discredited in spectacular fashion
Kind of funny, we'll start bombing Libya but out the other side of our mouth, help Japan to heal & repair.
Phhh. I fought fifty and fifty-one.
Wait, have I just been tricked into revealing too much here?
Bite me! I'm 50……Now, 51….that's old.
Cool, I made the curve! Thanks!
50 in April :'-(
Lordy, you're all older than dirt! I'm gonna be 25 in September, can't wait for the "quarter of a century" jokes.
Stop whinnying.
Neigh, I say! Neigh, neigh!
Oy. Tommy some of her ignorance might get on you. Wear a body condom like the ones in Naked Gun. Or have sex through a sheet. It'll feel just a little off but at least your delicate seeds will be protected from her.
Not to worry, had my cords clipped in '71. I would wear three rubbers, however, to try to keep the stupid from rubbing off on me, as you suggest.
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