Here he is, America’s Queen of Hearts! Larry Kudlow is the foulest talking head on any news channel. But how can he prove this, to people who don’t watch business news? By delighting in the death of so many in Japan, because this nightmare had not yet hurt his precious stock market. (Well, and how are things going today, Larry?) GAH.
AMERICA'S BIGGEST BUNGHOLE
March 15, 2011
CNBC’s Larry Kudlow Is Happy Japan’s ‘Human Toll’ Worse Than Stock Losses
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{ 168 comments }
but he's still really down about the Japanese housing market
Kraplow's never down on anything involving money except taxes. Only one direction in his mind is up up up up–see his 2008 incoherent ramblings about the imploding US America Real Estate market.
His is the only job besides weatherman in which one can, apparently, be 100% wrong every fucking time and still get paid. What an obnoxious pantload he is.
Up up up, something Kudlow's dick has never done.
I wish Larry Kudlow's parents had been killed at Pearl Harbor before he was born.
Too soon?
After actually listening to him, no. I figured this was just another Ken rant. But no, that fucker Kudlow actually said we should be thankful that the human toll was worse than the economic toll. I've lost patience with these fucks, every one of them. I'd be happy right now if the supposed FEMA death camps really existed, because I am tired of listening to this shit. Umm . . . and buttsecks. Also too.
Actually, not soon enough! What a pathetic Douche!!!!
And we've reached a new low…..
Chin up. The day is young.
Is it Morning in America yet?
Nah, here ya go…
"I just split up with my girlfriend, but like the Japanese say, 'They'll be another one floating by any minute now."
Tweeted by Aflac Duck voice Gilbert Gottfried…
Not as of yesterday afternoon.
Larry Kudlow has always been wrong in telling when to buy or sell. If he makes any predictions on the stock market he is wrong. Why is he still on the tvs?
Because all stock market prognosticators are ignorant, liars, or both. Like a broken clock, they're right sometimes.
In Cudlow's case it's because of his warm persona, charm and good looks.
That "still having a job despite being wrong all the time" thing? That's called the Bill Kristol Effect.
Jim Cramer too. He was pushing financial firms stocks when they were collapsing. He even got hammered by Jon Stewart over it, but yet he's still on CNBC.
He ought to be shoveling shit at sewer treatment plant.
"Won't someone please think of the MONEY???!"
…and the children's money. Let's not forget the children's money!
"HAVE U NO SHAME CNBC???"(SnowGrifter via Twatter)
For her to complain she would need to disagree with it first.
They give the Grifter templates for her tweets. Viz:
HAVE YOU NO SHAME <insert communist news service name here. it will probably be just a bunch of random letters. enter them in the order you see them.>???
Snowgrifter is too busy, bitching about:
Julianne Moore has been cast to play Palin in the movie, "Game Change". Palin responded, "I would ask, though, if they're of the mind of spreading the wealth around, that perhaps they want to spring for one of my kids' sets of braces or something as they capitalize on pretending to be me"
Oh Sarah, no one pretends to be you better than you do. Also, getting braces on Brisdull is going to be nearly impossible. There is no orthodontist nimble enough to slap the wires on her while she is constantly chewing her cud.
What, does Sarah think she's the only politician to ever be parodied on TV? Sorry dumbass, you are a public figure, much as everyone wishes you weren't, your image is fair game for parody, and you make it so easy by being such a moron.
Julianne Moore? Sarah should be fist pumpin' instead of bitching.
After her turn in Magnolia you know she can do that edgy/disturbed/ice-queen thing pretty well, but how's she going to do that wonderful, horrible, awful, awful voice? She pulls that off and I'm smelling Oscars.
Her victimized-by-everything character in Safe was a pretty good warm-up.
The more important question: with Julianne having played a lesbian in The Kids Are Alright, will she return to that well & f*ck Sophie B. Hawkins, for
male sexual gratification freedom?Maybe she will channel her role as Amber Waves?
What terrifies me about that film being made is that if Griftella De Vil ever watches it then Sarah Palin will be watching
Julianne MooreSarah Palin watchingTina FeySarah Palin at some point.Your universe has encountered a fatal error: #84094 Sarah Palin recursion overflow
Your universe will automatically restart in…
Thank God the Japanese don't have souls like real people, or what Larry said might have sounded heartless.
Kudlow's probably confident that Japan's wealthy plutocrats, AKA the only people whose lives matters, have survived and the dead are from the unwashed masses.
Wait, I think you're confusing Japanese with gingers.
Hey-!
Indeed. I will say it makes devouring puppies that much easier.
By the way, you'd be amazed how many ways there are to throttle a man through the internet. You'd be amazed….
It's cuz most of 'em are atheists. And they don't even cook their fish!
That's not a joke; some of the fundie morons are actually saying Japan was punished for being mostly atheist: http://scienceblogs.com/pharyngula/2011/03/it_was...
Excuse me? You know what, anyone claiming the Japanese don't believe in gods or the supernatural is just a moron. The Japanese believe there's a god of toilets. Trust me: they're not atheist.
Every damn thing in Shinto has a kami, or spirit, or god, if you will. There is probably a god of dildoes. Except for Sarah Palin and Bill Kristol.
Well, they're not white, and I'm pretty sure most of them aren't even christian, so that's yer win-win right there.
I, for one, welcome our new glow-in-the-dark geishas.
Another plus is that the ninjas can't sneak up on you so easily anymore.
Too soon!
Did I hear that woman on the right of him correctly, "this is good for the US economy"? How American of her to look at this event and decide whether or not it is good for the US. Because that is what is really important here. Not loss of life or homes and livelihood or the potential for millions of people to be exposed to harmful radiation.
It's all about us. I can't understand why people hate us, though…
And not just about us, but about our precious, precious Ameros.
Won't someone think of the Ameros?
UPDATE: Curse you, Manchu!
I'm finding it hard to take a position until I hear what Justin Bieber thinks.
I believe his last gig was financial advisor to Auric "Radioactive Ft. Knox" Goldfinger.
Greed is Good…Gekko
Not the lizard on the tv. The other lizard
The lizard still abides. The duck, on the other hand got the boot for making tsunami jokes.
Too soon, duck.
Carnival Cruise Lines does not anticipate tsunami impact.
Yes, that's true, it does tend to come as a surprise.
The cruising will be unaffected.
Ports of call, not so much.
I saw this happen in Titanic 2.
When our disater hits (asteroid/ Yellowstone megavolcano/ whatever Science channel doom you prefer) it's the narcissistic assholes like this that will make surviving it the worse option.
To be blunt, they're usually the first to die in the aftermath because
1) everyone gets sick of dealing with them and kills them for food.
2) they are so weak mentally that when their pathetic little world is shattered they have no coping mechanism to deal with it so they withdraw and will themselves to death
you might think that, but then again, they are so viciously venal and cut-throat that they'll do anything to survive
Most of this "type" of person aren't. They only think they are.
Oh, silly Manchu. Only the poor, common folk have to fight to survive.
/Leona Helmsley
You mean the kind who will lovingly tell you the specs of every firearm they possess and how they would kill anyone who broke into their home?
Those are the people who usually end up shooting their spouse/child/neighbor/pet.
by the way, is anyone else getting this shit?
"UnionsRStreetGangs is now following the comments you've made in IntenseDebate. This means they have opted to view updates of your latest comments.
Some info about UnionsRStreetGangs:
Description: Boycott union products and services whenever possible. Unions internalize all profit and externalize all costs.
Reputation: -109
Follows: 248
Followed by: 19"
Yeah I'm one of those that tiny dicked fat fuck is following. Oooh I'm so scared. Apparently, the little Koch sucker is upset at us.
Yeah, he's on my case too. He follows 248 commenters? Wow.
That takes a really dedicated troll. I applaud the effort.
I can't even imagine finding the time to do something so pointless on such a wide scale as that.
He should get an award; you know, like at the Special Olympics, or whatever.
A small man can be just as exhausted as a great man.
me haz a stalkr 2
"This is good news for the US economy…"
They should be praying for earthquakes to wipe out ALL our economic competitors. Or plagues. Or volcanoes. Or civil wars. Doesn't matter. As long as they're dead.
Jacka**es.
You used the ***' … on jackass?!!!
What the fucking fuck? Shit, where the fuck are you from you dumb cunt?!
Brought to you by the friendly and foul-mouthed people of the Wonkette Welcome Wagon. Howdy, fucking neighbor!
Yippie-Kai-Yay, Motherfucker.
AMERICA!! FUCK YEAH!!
Ooopsie… AMERICA!! [redacted] YEAH!!
I think he mistyped jackanapes.
Possibly cocksuckers, but probably jackanapes.
Ah, now I see. You're most certainly correct.
Nonetheless, he/she is still a goddamned popin**y and one fucking fuck of a ninnyhammer.
"wipe out ALL our economic competitors…."
It worked for 50-odd years after WW II.
As a dyed-in-the-wool knee-jerk-liberal, I must admit this is one uncomfortable fact that tax-the-rich promoters tend to ignore or forget when discussing our post-war economic success. If SE Asia and Europe hadn't been bombed into the bricks-and-stone age we wouldn't have done nearly so well selling our wares to them.
LOL! Jokes on them. We don't make wares in this country anymore.
and don't forget to install obedient dictators in every resource rich countries..
thats will do it
Yeah, but then where would they outsource jobs to?
How low could Kudlow go? This low apparently…
You can see his fluffers flinch as he accidentally utters the real feelings of Wall Street, but after that is back to the grind. Or tug, suck, twist, trample – whatever it happens to be that keeps their Hef vibrating…
Just wondering. If a fluffer flinches, do you get teeth marks?
Teeth marks, actual teeth, grills… You name it.
To Larry's credit it takes quite a bit of skill to be on the same network as Jim Cramer and Rick Santelli, and still come across as the world's biggest asshole.
It's a game at the moment: Who Will Be the World's Most Awful Goblin?
And these guys know how to play.
Remember when he used to share a show with Cramer? OMG it was hard watching that without a vein in my forehead bursting! Kudlow would swagger and insult Cramer in a condescending tone, and then Cramer would decompress by spewing excess steam, smoke, and flatulence out of his ears.
Rick Santorum is still the world's biggest asshole.
Technically, he is not actually an asshole, merely some byproduct leaking out of one.
What the fuck is up with CNBC? Isn't that obnoxious shitstain Santelli on there as well? No moral compass? No better angels? Come home to CNBC.
Could Not Be Cuntier
Corporate Nuts Breathlessly Coddled
Corpses Neglected By Cadaver
If there's one thing that The Sopranos should be praised for, it's injecting the adjective "cunty" into the vernacular.
I'm surprised Santelli hasn't been on there calling the Japanese people "losers" yet.
This is good news for the Japanese people. In the end there'll be more money to go around.
"And so many of the people in (Japan) here, you know, were (Japanese) anyway, so this is working very well for them."
/apologies to Bottle-Baby-Babs Bush
And a metric fuckload of broken windows to fix!
Thank God it hasn't disrupted the cruise business – they can continue to spew sewage into the oceans!
And do I hear a "buy" for corporations in the bidness of nucular remediation?
This will be good news for James Sokolove.
Larry Kudlow just won his 'play-in' game to earn a spot in March Madness Tournament of American Assholes With Microphones.
So what did you think of Kudlow's performance Dave?
Well, Jim, I think he really set a high bar here with some truly top-notch bungholery. But don't forget, we've got some prime contenders in the tournament who will no doubt take this as a challenge and really bring their "a-game."
He has to survive a play-in? Wow, with (what is it? A whopping 68 slots?), you'd think this guy would be seeded as high as a 5 or a 6.
Just heard about play-ins this morning. I sure hope the NCAA doesn't cheapen its brand by diluting the product.
In other sports "news," NFL owners want 52 games/year and 80 percent of the profits. Players say, "Whu?" because they're all suffering the aggregate effects of too many concussions and 'roid injections.
Someone deserves a 1 seed for using the term "bungholery".
Well played, sir/madam. Well played.
Couldn't view here at work, but the wiki>>huffPo trail mentions he has since apologized … via Twitter-shorthand.
"talking about markets.I flubbed the line. Sincere apology."
That's one class act, right there. This is America, covering our missteps in pixel-generated overtures trotted out as "sincere" when any fool can see the lack of remorse behind the crassitude.
Isn't there some way he could have made it sound less sincere? I'm half-surprised he didn't twitter-breviate it, like "sncr aplgy".
He should have used my favourite excuse/explanation for the week:
"The statement reflects a commentary that I made in the past."
/Made by an Aussie politician.
Actually, Kudlow is a professional. He spoke that line perfectly!
Hey, Twitter is about as sincere as people get nowadays.
I think Kudlow is just jealous of Gilbert Gottfried. He managed to get fired as the AFLAC duck for making tsunami jokes…maybe Larry is tired of working in the shadows of the duck.
Actually, this happened before GIlbert.
He didn't get fired for "the Aristocrats"? What a country!
However, he *did* get fired as the voice of the microsoft word paper clip.
Cocaine is a helluva drug.
I'm so happy the economic collapse is joined by the moral collapse. Just cover everything in one fell swoop, let's not waste any goddamn time.
What makes me sad is that I'm going to die surrounded by these consumerist crybabies. I can take teh cold and the hungry, but the bitching and moaning because the AC's been turned off will ball up my fist.
It is kind of funny how the Libertarians smugly claim to be all superior to everybody else, yet they're probably the world's biggest whiners who can never take it when you make fun of their religion; I've seen a number of other blogs when any mockery of Libertarianism is immediately followed by some pathetic little trolls defending their idiotic views.
I'm not sure which is worse, this or the asshats celebrating the earthquake/tsunami as "revenge for Pearl Harbor", which kind of ignores Hiroshima and Nagasaki, and the simple fact that any surviving Japanese men who fought in WWII are at least in their late 80s; just like here, the vast majority of the population was born long after that war, idiots.
will he laugh when Wall Street become the next epicenter of mega-tsunami inducing earthquake?
Yes. Because U.S. America taxpayer will bail them out.
Is there some sort of anti-humanitarian award we can give this dolt?
Inside of Kudlow’s mind…
Japan decimated?
PROFIT!
You left out step 2, "steal underwear", and step 3 "????"
Fuck what Kudlow says… just remember there are thousands of Christians in our great land, who are currently expressing Alleluia! to God for again showering America with providence, by not letting such a disaster happen here.
Yep! Disasters ONLY occur if you haven't been showering God with enough praise, in the exact right way for your denomination, unless your denomination is not the Right one, or (heaven Forbid) you aren't a Christian, in which case you're praying incorrectly and/or to the wrong God, in which case you caused the disaster yourself. Also, I'm still trying to figure out if agnosticism, atheism, or non-Christianity is the most efficient way of causing disasters; somebody should conduct some sort of double-blind test.
who are currently expressing Alleluia! to God for again showering America with providence, by not letting such a disaster happen
herein close proximity to where they or their morbidly obese brethren and sistren live. Or if it did, it only affected those who richly deserved it, like all those nigras and fags down in New Orleans in 2005.Fixed.
Yes, it certainly wasn't those white dickheads praying to God for rapture.
Oh, calm down, stock market. Even in the worst case scenario, it's not like the whole country will be uninhabitable, probably.
Ha HA.
A bunch of us are getting down voted. Looks like someone has their knickers in a twist.
Swords and Up Votes for Everyone!
No, but the place is gonna be a mess. Looks like General Motors shed that Hummer® Division a little too soon. Seems like that'd be pretty good vehicle for a post-nuclear-apocalypse landscape.
I wonder who owns the marque now? Yep, China.
So did Jack go to Japan? Is he there now?
Is your Wonkette broken? Jack felt his first <a href-"http://twitter.com/stuef">aftershock. Now he can come home.
Yes it was. Thank you. (And I see the downfister is getting everyone so I'll do some fisting – at first I thought it was just my dumb ass.)
No. He's fisting multiple asses.
He's like one of them multi-armed Hindu gods.
So, what happens when the nuclear bubble collapses? Larry Kudlow is irradiated and grows a heart?
those girls in the redshirts surrounding larry seem to be aware that something untoward was said.
They seemed to be a little taken back, but to save the day, they were ready to break in with Abba’s song, “Money, money, money.”
I'm investing in lumber, Japanese construction companies, and the funeral/crematoria industry. Every dark cloud has a silver lining!
'…foulest talking head on any news channel'. Boy that is quite a feat when there are so many of them…but usually not on stations that end in "NBC".
CNBC holds the monopoly on them for the ending in "NBC" channels.
No worse than the Fox Lizards last night spouting about how Obama had no business making jokey time with the rest of the politicos at the Gridiron WITH JAPAN IN CRISIS and how Obama had GOLFED 61 TIMES since running for president. GAWD he should be methed up and on call of the time, because it is 3AM somewhere, by Jeebus!
Ehhhh, needs more Thorazine said the head. Put on the Root Boy Slim record and start dozin' and droolin'…..zzzzzzzzz. And remember, Root Boy Slim was banned for life from his frat by his frat's president, George W. Bush.
This is what happens when you fuck a ninja in the ass, Larry!
So does Kudlow agree that Ohio should continue to expect no impact from the Japan earthquake, as was previously reported?
Shiny!
He's only saying this to divert attention from his funding of rocket launches for space-napping exhibitions borne from extinct volcanoes.
"The firing power inside my crater is enough to annihilate a small army. You can watch it all on my program on CNBC. It's the last program you're likely to see, Mr Bond."
Charlie Sheen? He's too busy, hiding from Mexico now that he's no longer their #1 importer of goods and Peruvian marching powder.
The WSJ Moneywatch Head:
Japan stock crash raises fear of wider global impact
But one analyst says impact in U.S., Europe to be subdued
I didn't bother to read further and find under which rock the Journal had found the one analyst.
Downfister's mad because we interrupted his pre-breakfast.
Fifth meal.
Do you mean that union pension funds control a ginormous amount of invested capital, and that if you fuck with the unions, there could be financial consequences? No way.
Keith Olberman's "Worst Person In The World"
But, how does this affect Charlie Sheen?
That is what the Japanese get for defying Governor Walker.
But God said he would not flood us ever again, right?
Just curious, what gives him the plus?
Tenacious D reference, on my part. It's funny, because if it's an F, it's failing, regardless what diacritical mark follows, but yet Jack Black thought to add it.
This must be the end times, because never before have there been wars, threats of war, famines, floods, earthquakes, etc. Except for every other moment of history, that is.
In all seriousness —
You seem to be assuming that the downfister is thinking things through, analysing the facts and objectively weighing them. I really don't think he/she/it is up for that.
Look at the shrill keening coming from the Right – do you see ANYONE thinking?
Kudlow has always been a self-importand little pussyfart, it has only been in recent years he totally sold his humanity and soul to the Gods of the Right. He is a pitiful excuse for a …..anything.
But that's Chinese, this is Japan, which – oh wait, it doesn't matter, all Asians are the same to the big fat racist.
Even Barbara Bush thinks that was low.
No she doesn't. She's not dirtying her beautiful mind with it…
My resident European was stunned yesterday to hear what she characterized as "the most American thing I've heard" about the catastrophe so far, someone on NPR saying that the earthquake and tsunami was "a great opportunity for Japan to rebuild."
But the profits of the stock market depends upon the toll of humans.
Results may vary.
Boy, I bet his CEO gets fired tomorrow, huh?
evil fucker is evil.
I have been boycotting CNBC for years. Kreepy Kudlow is the primary reason. Between him and Cramer, I don't know how anyone could work there and maintain their self-respect.
The only reason I can see to ever watch CNBC is if one has any money left that might be in peril of going the way the rest of one's money has gone. Since I don't, I don't.
same as glenn beck
Profits Over People
Capitalism is the height of civilization and morality!
Fuck you, Kudlow; fuck you with a roll of freshly minted Sacajewa dollars, you souless pig-dog. Really, I'm tired of pretending to be civil with these trolls who reap the benefits of humanity, but refuse to participate in it.
And we helped!
"*The vehicles… "
Killjoy.
Some people believe money is more important thanhuman life. These people would support the extinction of the human species if it would increase GDP over the next quarter.
Sadly, yes.
Only without the charisma.
Or intelligence.
Or purpose.
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