Haha, afraid much?

M&I Bank’s branch on the Capitol Square, at 1 W. Main St., closed Thursday after demonstrators, protesting campaign contributions by bank executives to Gov. Scott Walker, gathered outside the bank and several pulled their money out.

Sara Schmitz, a spokeswoman for M&I in Milwaukee, said in an e-mail the bank shut its doors “under the advisement of the Madison Police Department and due to the significant number of protesters surrounding the Capitol.”

This update to this post brought to you by Wonkette commenter missemish.

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  • SayItWithWookies

    I hear it's moving to Illinois.

    • nounverb911

      Is it hiding at the Days Inn?

  • V572625694
    • ShaveTheWhales

      So, if I'm reading between the lines correctly, these sub-par execudroids are getting their sweet sweet munnies because of, ahem, "sanctity of contract".

  • nounverb911

    Banks staying open is just so 1929.

  • [redacted]89048

    I've done this sort of thing in the past, but don't these people realize you don't have to physically withdraw your munnies anymore, your new banking institution (preferrably your credit union) is happy to do it for you?

    • nounverb911

      Also there's this thing called on-line banking also.

      • Yeah but there's nothing like video on the evening news of firefighters closing their accounts at an EVIL BANK, with the bank's sign right there on the screen.

        Plus, it costs a bank a lot more to do anything using a human at a physical branch. So if you want the maximum impact, do it in person, in your fireman uniform.

        • V572625694

          Ha ha, you're assuming any teevee talking heads would stop reading their Koch-approved press releases long enough to go out and actually cover something newsworthy without two days advanced notice and a guaranteed parking space at the site.

  • Barbara_i

    The sperm banks are still safe, right?

    • nounverb911

      The teabaggers deposits are being withdrawn prematurely.

      • Barbara_i

        They need to keep those teabagger spermies in a safe place so that we can oust Barack and create a perfect nation of "real Americans" Hmmm, where is somewhere cold and dark to keep the baby batter? I know! Sarah Palin's heart.

        • nounverb911

          Kind of like "Marathon Man" and "The Boys From Brazil"

      • magnetite….

        Just the title, but it fits so well

        • Barbara_i

          Thanks for the link, Magnetite!
          "The problem is well recognized in seed-bank circles" What is a "seed-bank circle?" Glasses are passed around, people sniff in the flaccid bouquet, take a taste and then spit it out? Then on to the cheese course….

          • magnetite

            I was eating* there, curse¹ you!

            The last one to decry the unions has to quaff the contents of the bucket.

            *I didn't actually stop, but I gagged somewhat.
            ¹Not really

          • Barbara_i

            Sorry, my bad. Thanks for the fun!

    • Dana Marschz

      Won't somebody think of the snowflake babies?!?

    • natoslug

      Mine's been recently washed and folded with its mate, so it should be safe.

    • Lionel[redacted]Esq

      In Wisconsin? No.

  • mereoblivion

    By jiminy, George Bailey would of talked those panicky panickmongers out of panicking!

    • SexySmurf

      David Koch is this generation's Mr. Potter.

    • Lascauxcaveman

      Apologies for stepping on your comment (below) but you only beat me by a minute. And I was digging around for a pertinent video clip to put in mine.

      • mereoblivion

        No apol needed! Thanks for the clip–it warms the cockles of my heart to be reminded why i can't stomach that movie anymore.

    • Come here a minute


  • nounverb911

    “under the advisement of the Madison Police Department and due to the significant number of protesters surrounding the Capitol.”
    The Police Union told the bank they were on their own.

    • fuflans

      i misread what you wrote as:

      the police union told the bank they were on FIRE.

      that would have been comedy gold.

  • elviouslyqueer

    Not to worry. M&I Bank has locations all over town to help serve your banking withdrawal needs!

    • Guppy06

      It looks like the next-closest staffed location is 1202 N. Sherman Ave, about 3 miles away.

      And this assumes we're talking about stuff that can't be emptied out from an ATM.

  • Lascauxcaveman

    Ha M&I suckers! Not even George Bailey can save your ass, now!

    It's a wonderful life.

    • Barbara_i

      Every time you hear a bell ring, it is another teacher who is losing their cushy, overpaid, part time job. I love teachers! If it weren't for them working part time in the grocery during the summer I would never get correct change back.

      • V572625694

        As a son* and grandson and brother and ex-husband of teachers, I agree: they've had it too easy for too long.
        *My mother, for instance, would stop on the way home for groceries, come home and cook dinner, sit and talk with my father for an hour while they had Martinis (I was raised right) and the dinner was cooked to death, manage the family struggles at the dinner table, clear and wash the dishes by hand, and then sit down at her desk and grade papers for a few hours, before getting up the next day to put on her heels and hose and suits to go to work, battering Chaucer and Milton into the thick skulls of teenagers.

        On the weekends: laundry!

        • jus_wonderin

          When I taught, I worked 3 jobs. Seriously. And we didn't really have that much to show for it. Though, I must say, my wife was a stay at home (with the child) mom. So, I can't really complain as I have the most perfect 23 year old daughter.

          I don't teach anymore. And the wife is an ex, but….allz good.

  • horsedreamer_1

    Licence to Ilsley.

  • SorosBot

    Aw, did the widdle bank's feewings get hurt?

  • Sophist [teadacted]

    "Tell us about our money, George? Where's our money?"

    "Your money's not here! Wait a minute, now, let me tell you. Let me tell you. Your money's in people's houses! In the Koch house, and the, um….well pretty much just in the Koch house."

  • aguacatero

    Milwaukeans & Ideologues?

    Megalomaniac-worshipping & Idiotic?

    'Mercan & Islamophobic?

    Money & Influence?

    • magnetite

      (You want all your) Money & Interrobang.

      edited for betteriness

  • iburl

    Mojo Nixon…

    Yeah throw the moneylenders out of the temple;
    I hate banks its just that simple.
    Royal Crown Pomade Tin,
    the best thing to keep your money in.
    Mason jar is okay too,
    if you see a bank well you know what to do.

    Now, lemme tell you people something…
    The only banks I like, well, I like Ernie Banks alright.
    And I like the banks of the Mississippi River…
    Yeah, and I like banks of fender twin reverb…
    Electric guitar amplifiers behind me, raging on the stages…

    Well, when I walk in they treat me like a dog;
    want to hit them in the head with a doo-doo log.
    Republicans, one and all…
    Their tallywackers are mighty small.
    Stealing from the poor gonna give to the rich…
    Wanna make the bank president twitch in a ditch.

  • Bonzos_Bed_Time

    Every time a banker quivers in fear an angel gets it's wings.

  • edgydrifter

    Any fool can start a fire. Few people are equipped and inclined to put one out. My advice to the banks: don't mess around with firefighters. That's like keying your dentist's car–how do you think your next root canal is going to work out?

    • Negropolis

      Any fool can start a fire. Few people are equipped and inclined to put one out.

      Amen. Also. Tambien.

  • "(The) concern was if the crowd continued to grow, it would be difficult for us to guarantee access and safety for those trying to get in and out of the bank," police spokesman Joel DeSpain said. He said police did not tell M&I officials to close the bank."


  • SmutBoffin

    Wait, banks are being threatened by the Cheesehead Rebellion, now? Maybe the NYT and other national daily media outlets will finally get their heads out of its asses on this story. A buncha working people getting screwed over by liars barely deserves a mention, but now that some of America's Greatest and Not-At-All-Incompetent Institutions are looking at blowback, things might change.

    Who know, maybe the President will even take notice!

    • Beetagger

      I'm sure Barry would say that the banks have assured him that everything they do is legal so they have his complete support. Then he would fire a liberal somewhere to fill his karma bank.

      • And give M&I another bailout, to make sure "America is on the right track."

        • HistoriCat

          I don't know – is that bipartisan enough?

          • Negropolis

            No. He then has to call them out for being sanctimonious purists. You know, what with wanting to be treated to human dignity and job security and the like.

      • Negropolis

        Then he would fire a liberal somewhere to fill his karma bank.


        Do't ask me why I made it an acronym, or what it means, because I have no effing idea. I just like the aesthetics, that's all, ok?

  • Gorillionaire

    So, having some firemen come in and close their accounts is bad publicity. Next, turning chickenshit and closing the doors early is, what, baaaad publicity?

  • Pragmatist2

    The bank executive are all inside watching the remastered and colorized version of "It's a Wonderful Life."
    They are crying at all the wrong scenes.

  • fuflans

    this is a much better protest strategy than pulling over to the side of the road for an hour.

    how'd that go anyway?

    • SexySmurf

      I'm guessing a lot of people who ran out of gas were pelted with garbage.

      • jus_wonderin

        One can dream.

    • [redacted]hse

      I got six.

  • hagajim

    Is withdrawing this kind of money some kind of Union creampie? Also – M&I must be a better bank that Citi because those firemen were able to get $192 out of there…when one of Sheen's "goddesses" tried to cash her $30K Charlie check at Citi – they had to give her an IOU….HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. That might be what M&I is handing out soon as well – also.

  • BaldarTFlagass

    Whenever I think of banks, I always think of the first scene of that scintillating film "Maximum Overdrive." From about 1:05 to 1:45. Says it all.

    • [redacted]byreality

      …Starring Emilio Estevez. Let's play Two Degrees of Charlie Sheen! (See hagajim's comment directly above).

  • Come here a minute

    Look at you. You used to be so cocky. You were going to go out and conquer the world. You once called me "a warped, frustrated, old man!" What are you but a warped, frustrated young man? A miserable little clerk crawling in here on your hands and knees and begging for help. No securities, no stocks, no bonds. Nothin' but a miserable little $500 equity in a life insurance policy. You're worth more dead than alive!

    • jus_wonderin

      Annnnnnnnd, dance by the light of the moon.

  • lochnessmonster

    Just goes to show you, money talks and unions walk!

  • Limeylizzie
  • glamourdammerung

    This seems to contradict that whole "let the markets decide" nonsense that keeps getting used as an excuse to do really bad policies.

  • [redacted]byreality

    "He's got all the money,
    He's got all the money,
    He's got all the money,
    And he won't give me none."

    The Late, Great Bobby Charles. RIP

  • Redhead

    Meh, fuckers. They can still go to the atm and pull most of it out, if not all – and I hope they do. They can close the account later.

  • Lionel[redacted]Esq

    The problem is, all of the good liberal banks end up investing all their money in weed.

    • ChernobylSoup


  • Blendergoathead

    You unwashed, stupid bank customers are SO stupid… didn't you know that every two-hundredth Monday afternoon is "close the bank and go caddying for the Koch family" day for the MI bank executives? DID YOU READ THE CHARTER?

    Keep fighting, Wisconsin!

  • Negropolis

    Sara Schmitz, a spokeswoman for M&I in Milwaukee, said in an e-mail the bank shut its doors “under the advisement of the Madison Police Department and due to the significant number of protesters surrounding the Capitol.”

    Shorter Sara Schmitz: OMG! They are coming back to withdraw what's rightfully there's. They are going to break the bank! Panic!

    • horsedreamer_1

      Unlike Ms Schmitz, I may be broke, but I'm not flat busted.

      (Judging by the various & presumably unrelated Schmitz I have known, I imagine Sara is, how to say, "very German looking". Think: Schulze in the hot-tub in Schulze Gets the Blues.)

  • Negropolis

    Hey banks: Y'all just got ganked by Teh Invisible Hand. How's that overlordy, feudalizzy thing workin' for ya'?

  • notreelyhelping

    Ah…sweet, sweet irony.

  • ttommyunger

    Ahh, closing early! That's the ticket! Problem solved….

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