Creepy Nerd Ross Douthat Gets All Horny Over Idea of Monogamy

For some reason, theNew York Timesemploys a weird boy-child who is utterly obsessed with the sex he never gets to have -- and this guilt-plagued onanist writes his embarrassing tripe on the op-ed page, where adults are supposed to write about World Events or whatever. (Why do we subscribe to theNYT, again? Oh right, we don't.) So, here is orc-nerd Ross Douthat shaving his hairy palms again so he can type more horny wingnut drivel about how some people who have sex somewhere may be having sex in a way that now suits Ross Douthat.

Ugh, why is Douthat paid to write about people having sex? Probably just to drive us bonkers, the same way David Brooks is paid to write about "what's cool" and Thomas Friedman is paid to type about the round flat world that baffles him unless he's golfing. Douthat should really be put in aspecial homefor this particular unseemly obsession with people who manage to find other people to hump on:

But there are different kinds of premarital sex. There’s sex that’s actually pre-marital, in the sense that it involves monogamous couples on a path that might lead to matrimony one day. Then there’s sex that’s casual and promiscuous, or just premature and ill considered.

Oh, for fuck's sake, shut up and stop masturbating on everybody, again. Time to re-readThe Hobbitfor the twelfth time this year, so far! [NYT]