Amoral Serial Adulterer Newt Gingrich Questioned About His Amoral Serial Adultery
Newt Gingrich is one of the foulest human beings on the "national political stage," and that's really saying something! One thing he likes is to find some young staffer to bang when his "old wife" gets cancer or isn't as young or whatever, which sounds improbable only because he is a physically repulsive pot-bellied neck-toad, but when you are a staffer working for Newt Gingrich, you are probably the type to be impressed with Washington's corporate whore/sleaze merchants like Gingrich. Anyway, some gal at a college gave Newt all kinds of hell last night. THE POLITICO reports:
"You adamantly oppose gay rights... but you've also been married three times and admitted to having an affair with your current wife while you were still married to your second," Isabel Friedman, president of the Penn Democrats, said to Gingrich. "As a successful politician who's considering running for president, who would set the bar for moral conduct and be the voice of the American people, how do you reconcile this hypocritical interpretation of the religious values that you so vigorously defend?"
Gingrich cut her off and then spouted some horseshit about how the 'murican people would decide if his Distant Past really mattered, because he's such a catch, as a presidential candidate. Then he farted through his eyes and thousand-dollar bills rained down upon him. [ Politico ]
Precisely. I'm thinking something like:
gingrich: the collective noun for a cluster of maggots ["The dead pigeon was home to a swarming gingrich of maggots."]
gingrich: a stray lump of feces that resists wiping after a bowel movement ["I needed to use half a roll of toilet paper to wipe off that gingrich."]
I admit he is a better man than I. If I could fart $1000 bills out of my eyes, someone else would be typing this while I chowed down on my fourth serving of Bush's Baked Beans.