Rahm Emanuel, the former chief of staff to President Barack Obama, won the Chicago mayoral election Tuesday, topping the 50% threshold to avoid a run-off vote, CNN projects.
Bye fucker. [CNN]
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February 22, 2011
Political Wire
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{ 62 comments }
Shortest Wonkette headline ever!
At least until Ken writes a piece called "GAH". Just "GAH".
Same word count as the shortest sentence in the Bible!!!
for me, hello fucker.
My prediction: he spends a year or so on snow removal and hot dog vendors, then says, "Fuck this," and puts together an army and invades Wisconsin.
Invade WI?
"We shall fight in the dells
we shall fight on the isthmuses
we shall fight in the cow pastures and cheese factories
we shall fight in Miller Stadium
we shall never surrender…"
That one actually might count as a fucking liberation.
No Sconnie wants to be liberated by a buncha Fibbers!
(Haha, wut?)
We call that a weekend series with the Cubs.
Miiler Field=Wrigley North
Or just cold rip out all rails & roads to Milwaukee while using the high speed rail bux that Douchebag Walker rejected to build a line south to Metropolis., IL Fuck yeah!
Who would want a state that would elect Scott Walker as governor?
Will he promise to put Walker's head on a pole?
That's Mayor Rambo, motherfucker.
Rahm says Wonkette is a fucking retard.
Remember: every time you use the word "retard," you mentally undress Willow or something.
what do i have to say to physically undress her? mongoloid?
Probably better looking than Sarah or Bristol.
Run republicans run.
Say what you like about Rahmbo, at least Chicago will have yet another interesting mayor. Because while there are a lot of good things about life in Los Angeles, the best that can be said about our city politics is that they could put the worst – case insomniac to sleep…
ACORN! ACORN!
Good job, ya motherfucking cocksucker; also I propose that in tribute to Rahm profanity should be fucking mandatory on this thread.
That's foreplay talk right there, I don't care who you are.
Use some proper fucking language there, ya prickcock.
prickcock, i like it but it doesn't exactly, er, roll off the tongue now does it.
Hey fuck you, you fucking retard. Don't fucking tell me what side of the bed to shit on! I don't even know what the fuck that means, but that didn't fucking stop me from saying it, you fucking fuck! Oh, and your mother is whore!
/Rahm'd
Cicada, I Rhaming upfist you for your Tourette outburst.
If it matters, I am naked and in the shower as I type this.
Drop your linen and stop your grinnin you fucking pansies.
Now if Rahm would just bring a billygoat to Wrigley Field, maybe the Cubs will win too.
His swearing in ceremony is going to be quite salty. Fuck you very much! Congrats Rahm!
The first motherfucking "swearing-at" ceremony in fucking Chicago history.
Whatever votes upon five fingers is an enemy.
Whatever votes upon four fingers, or has wings, is a friend.
Good luck with the unions, Rahm – from my memory you guys could invade Wisconsin and smack down Ohio-love me some Chicago! Northside rules, Southside sucks!
Nobody EVER says "northside rules" in Chicago, because the existence of a "southside" is only a rumor — an area on the map labeled "Here Be Negroes, Mexicans, Bohunks & U. of C."
Or "That area around Cominsky"
Rahmmayor.
When a crony buys a seat with insider money.
Chicago, fuck yeah!
Frank Conniff "TV's Frank" just posted on Twitter:
Chicago elects new Mayor, thanks to 11th hour slogan, "Rahm Emanuel: Not That Big An Asshole Compared To Scott Walker."
Frank rocks!
Makes up for Mike Nelson being a motherfucking Libertarian.
Do you look at Muammar's outfits and think "Manos, the Hands of Fate?"
Served with a short, the stirring conclusion to "Hired."
Yes, yes I did.
Well, what'd'ya'know?
Harold Washington or GTFO
Rahm Mayor should not be confused with Rom Spaceknight.
While Ron Co makes a damn fine rotisserie.
Or Ron Popeil and his Pocket Fisherman
Yay! As a Chicago resdient, I must say that I'm tired of "kinder gentler" Rahm, otherwise known as "Campaign Rahm"–I'm ready for ass-kicking, dead-fish-sending Rahm!
Not just "Campaign Rahm."
"Obama-Rahm" seemed held back and WAY too civilized!
I'm looking forward to some ass-kicking as well.
Unleashed Rahm!
I think he's the hottest mayor in America. Oh hell, he's the hottest fucking mayor in the whole gawdamn fucking world. I'd do him.
Rahm's first order of business: Chicago shall now be spelled Fucago.
Any of you fuckers want to motherfucking fucking fight about the fuckin' thing?
Did he really win, anything, though? After the Census results, recently, it looks like he just won control of a city whose pride has taken a major blow, which really isn't such a bad thing for a city that can be arrogant as fuck (ask the rest of us Midwesterners. It's always Chicago this, and Chicago that.)
It definitely beats Cincinnati.
The epic battle of ego between Rahm, Billy Corgan, & Kanye will be quite fun, though.
At least our companies don't have to hire fucking Eminem to IMPROVE our image.
I met him at the train station. He's cute wee thing, like a ferret or a gila monster. Put him in your pocket and he'll gnaw his way out through your lower intestines.
The dead have spoken.
The dead have also let Rahm know that they would like him to keep the death tax buried. They will tolerate nothing less. In fact, they'd like another tax cut, 'cause that's what all other Americans want (perpetually), presumably.
Sorry, I'm sure Chicago's a nice town, but I just don't care.
Will he take back the parking meters?
Mayor Rahm 'Harm' Emanuel. Just call him 'The Harm'.
Yay! Cronyism will live another 100 years in chicago! This time with more swear words.
I will miss the fake Rahm twitter feed: http://twitter.com/MayorEmanuel
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