whose woods these are

The Joe the Plumber Show, Coming To a Cheeto-Smudged Monitor Near You


Joe the Plumber was previously making a living with Pajamas Media somehow. He is now doing this. And miles to go before I sleep. And miles to go before I sleep.

Does Joe the Plumber now live in the barn in this video? Is he our horse? Does he think us queer to stop without a farmhouse near? We hear his harness bells shake.

(We bet he plays that cello back there, at least.) [Weigel]

About the author

Jack Stuef is your loyal editor and a freelance satirist or something like that. He is a contributing writer for The Onion. E-mail him or whatever.

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Comments

Hey there, Wonkeputians! Shypixel here to remind you to remember our Commenting Rules For Radicals, Enjoy!

  • metamarcisf

    Sounds to me like a good fit. Like Dennis Miller on "Monday Night Football"

    • http://www.wonkette.com Dr_pangloss

      Downthumber is downthumbing again?

    • gef05

      Hey metamarcisf,

      What the hell are you doing wrong, mate?

      You were getting close to the psychologically important -120p a few days ago, weren't you? But here you are drifting back towards the mediocrity of -110.

      Let me know if you need some downfisting to get back on track.

      • metamarcisf

        The sad truth is: I'm all out of Krauthammer jokes.

  • nounverb911

    Does he get paid for this?

  • baconzgood

    I don't know……I think it needs more monkeys. LOTS MORE MONKEYS! Can't go wrong with monkeys on teevee.

    • Worthly Wokette Skum

      Indeed, that opens a clear path to the presidency. You just can't go wrong with a president that starred on TV with monkeys.

  • dr_giraud

    So it's OK with Blondie if Joe the Bag 'o douche repurposes (i.e., destroys) "Sunday Girl"?

    • SmutBoffin

      Haha, will the Joe the Plumber version still have parts in French?

  • SorosBot

    Hadn't this idiot finally faded into his rightful position in obscurity?

    • gef05

      As a talking head on a right-wing radio show dedicated to current affairs?

    • hagajim

      If there's one thing that St. Sarah taught us all it's that if you're a big enough turd it takes that 15 minutes a long time to fade away. Granted, old Joe isn't as good at it as the snowbilly – but he's trying.

  • Ducksworthy

    WILL NOT WATCH But I did once see an uncensored episode of the Soupy Sales Show where Soupy opens the door and starts cracking up. The audience shot can't see what's behind the door but the second camera shows a very talented young woman with tassels attached to her nipples swinging them in opposite directions. If Joe the Plunger had something educational like that on his show, I'd watch that. maybe.

    • nounverb911

      My favorite Soupy Sales joke was:
      "I took my wife to a baseball game, I kissed her on the strikes, and she kissed me on the balls".

      • Ducksworthy

        Pretty good for a kids show.

    • Gleem_McShineys

      NO TASSLES ON JOE PLUMBERS NIPPLES! NO NO NO

  • http://wonkette.com/ Monsieur_Grumpe

    Waddaya know Joe?
    I can answer that question.

    • SorosBot

      Joe, you don't know Diddly.

    • baconzgood

      It was first called "Joe Blow" until he figured out why people were snickering.

  • tiredalways

    Will he invite Sarah Palin as guest on his show one of this days?

    • PristineODummy

      I thought Scare-ah hadz a mad on Joe? And Toad wrote him mean emails between banging the nice massage lady?

  • owhatever

    MORE COWBELLS !!!!

  • http://whateveritisimagainstit.blogspot.com trampndirtdown

    Fuck you John McCain.

    • snoopyfan2010

      Substitute "Real" America for McCain please. That's who really made this garbage popular.

    • fuflans

      i think i've said this before but this is going to be his legacy – the dumbing down of the american political debate to the point where it's nothing but twitter mutterings by barely educated celebutards.

      i would be very sad for him only i'm a vengeful bitch and i have to live in this america.

      • horsedreamer_1

        Mc Cain has never been the brightest bulb in the vanity, either.

  • http://www.wonkette.com ManchuCandidate

    It's good news for McCain, right?

    • tiredalways

      I thought its supposed to be good news for Sarah Paylin..

  • http://ifthethunderdontgetya.blogspot.com/ ifthethunderdontgetya

    Joe knows shit. And that's it.
    ~

    • prommie

      "Hot is on the left, cold is on the right, and shit don't flow uphill. And never bite your fingernails." Thats it, you are now a trained plumber.

  • BeWoot

    Well, Warhol did say that in the future everybody would be famous for 17 minutes. But hasn't it been 18 minutes already for this guy?

    • bflrtsplk

      Inflation.

  • jmarsh04

    I hope he's doing this for free, since taking money from a rich, hard-working teevee-station owner's pocket and depositing it into your checking accout is considered a redistribution of wealth.

  • elviouslyqueer

    Stop fucking that chicken, Joe. No, really.

  • Oblios_Cap

    I made about 20 seconds. "We're here to talk about right and wrong, not right and left." Wow, rightwingers sure are clever, aren't they?

    Why does anybody care what Joe's opinion is? We have a bad case of Moron Worship in this here egg-ceptional cuntry of ours.

    • baconzgood

      It took him 5 days to come up with that.

    • genxr

      I need a blackboard for clarification…

      us = right
      them = wrong

      Okay, I think I got it now.

  • SexySmurf

    You know your talk show sucks when your most famous guest is María Conchita Alonso and it's not 1986.

    • LionelHutzEsq

      Hey, she was in that movie with Schwarzenegger, and look what happened to him!

    • Barrelhse

      Next week it's John Wayne. But not live.

      • billy_reuben

        I would totally watch that.

  • Sophist [APPLESAUCE]

    Joe the Plumber? Didn't he die in a grease-fire or something? I'm pretty sure I read that somewhere…

  • JoshuaNorton

    I'll have you know that the Cheetos with jalapeno ain't too bad. Of course, that may be a little too "illegal immigrant" for the Teabaggers. They probably like the bland puffy ones that just go "poof" and leave your mouth full of cheesy dust.

    What were we talking about?

    • Trinket

      I myself like candied Cheetos.

      • LetUsBray

        Cheetos wrapped in bacon is way awesome.

  • SheriffRoscoe

    So it's just going to be Joe inviting us into his cabin, sitting down over a cup of coffee to talk about all the plain, common sense ideas of how to fix the country, sprinkled with cheap jabs at Bill and Hillary Clinton's marriage. It'll be like The View, but with more plaid flannel shirts and Elmer Fudd hats.

    • http://whateveritisimagainstit.blogspot.com trampndirtdown

      +1 sir.

    • Sophist [APPLESAUCE]

      Everyone in the audience will find a gift bag under their seat filled with 10-gauge shotgun shells, squirrel-jerky and literature from the John Birch society.

      (oops, this was supposed to to be posted under the comment below–pretend I did that, instead of revealing what an incompetent jackass I am)

      • snoopyfan2010

        still funny….

    • elviouslyqueer

      And moonshine jugs. NEVAR FORGIT.

    • genxr

      Until his intern Winona Ryder edits his note cards with clever phrases about touching little children.

    • Ducksworthy

      Or like the Red Green show but with actual morans.

  • http://www.flickr.com/photos/30500320@N06/ DerrickWildcat

    Kinda like Oprah, without the hair…and the dignity.

  • http://gratuity.wordpress.com/ Gratuitous World

    So it's 2011 and people are still giving Joe a platform? I definitely lost that bet. So long pinky toe.

    • HistoriCat

      Rahm?

    • Extemporanus

      Bunny Lebowski?

      • http://gratuity.wordpress.com/ Gratuitous World

        i can get you a toe.

  • SayItWithWookies

    I'd watch it, but that asshole never finished telling me how to plug my cable converter box in.

  • bumfug

    Joe? The Plumber? I thought his name was Larry and he was a Cable Guy.

    • DonnyKerabotsos

      Joe is just Larry the Cable guy with sleeves.

      • OneDollarJuana

        funnier

  • prommie

    Any random street schizophrenic would be more intelligent, well-informed, and interesting. Lunatics are often pretty smart, intelligence seems to cause insanity. Its fucking dimbulb high-functioning tards like this guy and Palin and Bachman and the legions of Tea-Tard followers who have nothing to fear from mental illness, they don't have enough cognition to suffer cognitive impairment.

    • Trinket

      I'm pretty sure Michelle Bachmann is crazy.

    • Barrelhse

      Well, you've at least given me some hope for myself.

  • Oblios_Cap

    I liked the pipe wrench on his "interview" desk.

    • Beowoof

      Too bad he thinks the only use for that wrench is hitting liberals with it.

  • littlebigdaddy

    Joe the Dumber. Sarah the Dumbest.

  • __kth__

    Live, from SkoalRebel's cabin!

    • DaRooster

      Flaaaveerrrrd Deeeeyyuup… damn Obahama.

  • Barbara_i

    Make fun of this douche all you want but the truth is that he's still done more interviews than Sarah Palin has. *shiver*

  • JoshuaNorton

    I'm guessing they couldn't afford writers so they hired several monkeys, who did nothing but fling their poo on blank paper, and this was the best interpretation that Not-Joe the Not-Plumber could get from poo on paper. You know, kind of like what Glenn Beck does.

  • owhatever

    Pleases. No more pictures of Joe the Plumber. They hurts my eyebones.

  • Worthly Wokette Skum

    Joe clearly hasn't figured out that the Red Green Show is a joke.

  • LionelHutzEsq

    Yes! Because I've always wondered what the Glenn Beck show would be like without all of FOX's money and all of the cocaine.

    The only problem is that I'm sure Sarah Palin will sue him for stealing her idea.

    • PristineODummy

      You would too if someone took the only idea you'd ever had.

  • Rosie_Scenario

    As I recall, he achieved "fame" by asking candidate Obama about how tax changes might affect the new plumbing business he was going to start. Another fake, fraud, freak. Also.

    • genxr

      Yes, he should have asked Obama how tax changes were going to affect his new career as right wing fame whore.

    • Beowoof

      I do believe his claim to fame was influenced by his relationship to John McCain's campaign manager. Joe talking to Obama was a set up from day one.

  • OneDollarJuana

    So, is Joe Sarah Palin's Dr. Phil?

  • JackObin

    Joe knows how to smirk and drool. Other than that, he's pretty much Bush-like.

  • Troubledog

    Only in this great nation can an unlicensed plumber become famously known as Joe the Plumber.

    I am heartened that if he ever runs as a write-in for public office, no one will be able to spell his real last name correctly.

    • Boredw/Gravity

      "Joe da plummer," "Draculacunt"….. it's all good and acceptable.

  • jus_wonderin

    NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

  • http://www.storycorner.us/ JustPixelz

    From the skill set Joe brings to his plumbing, talk-talk and other endeavors, he better hope that whole socialism thing actually takes hold.

  • __kth__

    dickless moron is downbumping people, pls rectify

  • CapnFatback

    Meh. I'll wait for Univision to come out with The Tito the Builder Show.

    • snoopyfan2010

      That would be more credible, also, too. Did you notice that he now says he is a farmer?

      • Beowoof

        He is qualified to shovel shit into a manure spreader.

  • WhatTheHeck

    Idjut, moran, imberseal.

  • gef05

    Nice to see some things don't change. The guy was a waste of time back whenever-the-hell-it-was, and still is.

  • sportshort

    In the future, everyone will be famous forever, provided they cling to fame with a rabid wildebeests' intensity and are willing to be a running fucking joke in perpetuity. Yay! Imbeciles rule! My left nut for President in 2012!

    • CapnFatback

      I'm sure it will be far more qualified than whatever right nut decides to run.

  • PalinPussyPower

    I can't watch because I was planning on having sex tonight and nothing dries me up faster than a jobless redneck oozing with hubris.

    • PublicLuxury

      Well said.

  • Boredw/Gravity

    Needs moar inbreeding and backwoods axe murders.

    • gef05

      You're too easily pleased.

  • Penis_Vagina

    did that motherfucker's welfare finally give out? what a fucking douchnozzle.

  • mavenmaven

    Joe the Plumber? *eyeroll* Isn't he so *over*? How 2008….

  • snoopyfan2010

    The lyrics SAY for all Americans but…..oh yeah the street smarts guys is very very urban so there you go.

  • ttommyunger

    Just when I think the bar for fame can't get any lower in this 'Merika…..

  • MissTaken

    Well, ah shit. The little movie won't play (could be my work server or the utter ineptitude of Joe The Plumber, it's a toss up!).

    BUT! It does have this lovely message:

    "Well, this isn't right.
    Sorry, we've encounterd an error and can't play the video.
    There's plenty more to watch at RIGHTNETWORK.com though."

    …ah yes, I "encounterd" a turd that had Joe's name written all over it.

  • Soylent Green

    Well, if Palin's still out there makin' a buck, I guess its back in the ring for ol' Joe.

  • http://www.kenlayisalive.org KenLayIsAlive

    Will we get to watch his trials and tribulations as he finally tries to become licensed? And also become, you know, a plumber?

  • aguacatero

    Finally — a TV show for the less lettered of us!

    • Oblios_Cap

      The TeaTards' Letterman.

  • Maxdaddy128

    Maria Conchita Alonso???!!! Man, talk about a career hitting the skids!

  • carlgt1

    what great timing – 2.5 years after his relevance & 15 minutes of fame!

  • PublicLuxury

    Needs moar buttsecks

  • ttommyunger

    Not Guilty, Yoah Honor! Flabbergasted, Yes. Stupified, Naturally! Amused? A little. Spiteful? Jealous? Notsomuch. As a matter of fact, I feel a little sorry for the big dumb cunt, but not much.

  • CUNextTuesday

    Ow My Balls!

  • Dudleydidwrong

    Can we go lower than this? Probably, but let's not think about that abyss. This one is horrid. About 15 seconds in I think he picks his nose and wipes a booger on his pants. About 15 seconds from the end the "voice" (maybe Joe himself!) talks about the Constitution and they show a picture of the Declaration of Independence. Between those two highlights there was a whole shitload of agony. John McCain: the scumbag that keeps on giving…

  • sati_demise

    Say it ain't so.

  • Barrelhse

    "And miles to go…" Jesus, put the bitch out of his misery.
    Please.

    • Beowoof

      Does give one a thought on how to use that pipe wrench on his desk.

  • fuflans

    i would like to see a joe show mash-up with 'jersey show'.

  • problemwithcaring

    hypocrite: (n) a person who feigns some desirable or publicly approved attitude, especially one whose private life, opinions, or statements belie his or her public statements.

    From this definition and the mere fact that anyone even knows who Joe Wurkowskierwhatevs is, proves that America tolerates hypocrites just fine, thank you.

  • a_pink_poodle

    What do you know, Joe?

    What is this, the 20's? 23 SKIDOO!

  • zhubajie

    I thought he was in the Israeli army?

  • horsedreamer_1

    With the goatee, we're seeing what "Stone Cold" Steve Austin will look like in another five or so years, after the massive steroids doses have demonstrated their full effect.

  • http://www.wonkette.com i_like_tigers

    O.K. Joe the Plumber thought that he was going to have to pay increased taxes because his income would magically grow from 60k to over 250k. (I am using "thought" liberally.) Maybe he was right? Brain hurts.

  • krazyvladimir

    and his qualifications are wha ????

  • NadePaulKuciGravMcKi

    fine group of neocons
    ~ Pajamas Media ~

  • SaintRond

    That piece of shit.