About the author

Jack Stuef is your loyal editor and a freelance satirist or something like that. He is a contributing writer for The Onion. E-mail him or whatever.

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Hola wonkerados.

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  1. donner_froh

    You wish you could pat down Sean Penn's T & A, Drudge. Better for everyone if you just think about it while you pleasure yourself in whatever disgusting way you have devised.

      1. Naked_Bunny

        I dunno, but he must be getting old if the best he can manage with hair-trigger airport security is a "kerfluffle".

        1. horsedreamer_1

          I'd also heard ScarJo & Ryan Reynolds were back on.

          Another win, for Canada. (As if Olympic Hockey Gold wasn't enough for those people.)

  2. researchrants

    Drudge has been calling TSA "T&A" for months and months now. It's funny because it's true, I guess?

  3. BarryOPotter

    They checked his Time & Attendance sheet? That's unkonstitooshunul! He doesn't work for them! Oh, wait, it means what? And someone wanted to look at Sean Penn's? That's just fucking sick, man…

  4. XOhioan

    As an aside from discussing Sean Penn's vagina, "kerfluffle" is the kind of manly vocab one can expect from a conservative on the down-low.

  5. LionelHutzEsq

    Sean Penn gets a T&A pat down for free? Do you know how much I have to pay for one at the local strip club?

Comments are closed.