• May 26, 2012
IT'S MORNING IN AMERICA

February 4, 2011

GOP: Cut Basic Human Services, Increase Funding For Pentagon

by Riley Waggaman  

Paul Ryan, blowin' out your welfare birfday candles.

  • Washington’s decadent spending spree is over, motherfuckers! There’s a new House Budget Committee Chairman in town, and his name is Paul Ryan. Maybe you’ve heard of him before, since he is the world’s most famous money-saving wizard? (When cleaning his bunghole, Paul Ryan always uses both sides of a piece of toiler paper — and if he doesn’t have to wipe twice, he’ll use the poop-less side to blow his nose. This is just one example of his incredible thriftiness, according to Wikipedia.) And here is more proof that Paul Ryan is magic: He believes the best way forward is to allocate an extra $8 billion to Homeland Security and the Pentagon, and then cut $40 billion from domestic agencies that waste valuable taxpayer dollars on transportation, housing, science programs, financial services and other things taxpayers are in constant need of. Haha, Paul Ryan just violently tongue-punched our collective fart box. [WaPo]
  • Someone hijacked a Greyhound bus and took it for a burn cruise around North Carolina! And then this bus terrorist was tasered, probably brutally, by policemen. Speaking of which, remember when “a Greyhound Canada bus passenger repeatedly stabbed and then decapitated a young man who was sitting and sleeping beside him”? Oh, Greyhound. [Baltimore Sun]
  • And here is today’s most revelatory news article headline: “Census Finds Hurricane Katrina Left New Orleans Richer, Whiter, Emptier.” The End. [Bloomberg]

{ 133 comments }

Beowoof February 4, 2011 at 8:50 am

I never understand the cutting of mass transit. I mean without mass transit, then I would have to pay the maid and the gardner enough to buy a car to get my house for work.

PubOption February 4, 2011 at 8:57 am

Then the Repubs can complain about the number of illegals driving without a license or insurance.

nounverb911 February 4, 2011 at 12:22 pm

Some idiot in Georgia is proposing that the state get rid of drivers licenses. http://www.constitutionpreservation.org/articles/...

SorosBot February 4, 2011 at 12:37 pm

Look, I know I said it was stupid that we require a license to drive but not to own a gun, but you seem to have gotten my point backwards.

mumbly_joe February 4, 2011 at 9:00 am

Or for that matter, science funding. Yeah, when did science ever contribute to economic growth?

What's that, every time ever? Where'd you read that? In an econ 101 textbook? Yeah, but economics is a science, too, so we'll cut that also.

SorosBot February 4, 2011 at 9:17 am

Ah, but science leads to people relying on observation and experiment to determine how the world works, instead of putting their trust in what a bunch of robed pedophiles tell them, which is how everything should be.

PubOption February 4, 2011 at 9:37 am

What do you expect? Science finds conclusions that go against GOP othodoxy. Cut history as well, so no-one knows about King Canute.

SorosBot February 4, 2011 at 9:16 am

Well, mass transit is primarily used by the urban poor and middle class; and according to the GOP we should kindly give up whatever little things help our lives for the benefit of our overclass betters. Hey, someone who has an eight-mile subway ride to work can always just get up three hours earlier and walk to and from work, right?

freakishlywrong February 4, 2011 at 9:21 am

I KNOW. Without the Metro, how will all those screechy assholes get to the mail to rail against sochializm?

MALL, stupid.

charlesdegoal February 4, 2011 at 9:33 am

You know who else cut public transportation services? Mubarak, that's who.

MoeDeLawn February 4, 2011 at 9:58 am

Not only that, but if they eliminate buses, where will the Canadian stabbing decapitators get relief?

BarryOPotter February 4, 2011 at 8:52 am

…Paul Ryan just violently tongue-punched our collective fart box.

Let me just add to the chorus: Good to have you back, Riley.

Oblios_Cap February 4, 2011 at 8:52 am

The GOP continuously shows its contempt for the citizens that they claim to represent, and yet a large number of idiots fatihfully vote for them. I know the military war machine is completely populated by a better class of Americans (or so I'm led to believe) than the rest of us – remember, the government has never created a single job! – but enough is enough.

The mind boggles.

MildMidwesterner February 4, 2011 at 9:04 am

He beats me because he loves me.

BarryOPotter February 4, 2011 at 9:27 am

He beats me because he loves to beat me.

/TruthinessInserted

HistoriCat February 4, 2011 at 10:44 am

"contempt for the citizens that they claim to represent, and yet a large number of idiots fatihfully vote for them"

yeah, that's why I have contempt for that particular segment of the community too.

hagajim February 4, 2011 at 11:44 am

I think the "large number of idiots": section of the post sums it up perfectly.

BTWBFDIMHO February 4, 2011 at 2:30 pm

It's another proof that only those with the stronger lobby will get a bigger slice of the cake. Because, where is the lobby of the citizens?

Lost_Teabaggers February 4, 2011 at 6:11 pm

Yeah, it does….I sort of use the Jabba the Hut analogy to explain it. See, the rich in this country are like big, fat worms and non-wealthy wingnuts are sorta like that lil' creature that sits on their shoulders all gaunt and laughing at every self indulgent, cruel thing they do to others. They've convinced themselves that it's "freedumz" for the rich to disenfranchise others and take their wealth, and they defend this principle to the absolute death. Of course you can't overlook the authoritarian angle/component of it…..when the government raises tax on the rich and corporations in order to not have to pay such high taxes they share the wealth, which means minority groups and other undesirables might actually see their boats rise too. Lee Atwater described this as being part of the GOP economic policy, to deny minorities opportunities to move up in the world…as part of the understanding they had with white Southerners.

Barbara_i February 4, 2011 at 8:56 am

Katrina and birthday cakey. Reminds me of that picture of Bush and McCain, yucking it up on the White House lawn, while Walnuts was presented a birthday cakey that no one even touched on the day that Katrina decided to give the Gulf Coast a blow job.. Not since R Kelly used to learn a video cam has there been more damning evidence of stupidity for everyone's scrapbook.

Barrelhse February 4, 2011 at 9:06 am

Talk much? lol

Barbara_i February 4, 2011 at 9:47 am

Who?

Barbara_i February 4, 2011 at 10:59 am

I'm going to assume that the "talk much" is directed at me, Barrelhse. I apologize that I am annoying you and I am going to move on so that you can enjoy your time here and won't feel the need to be rude to me. I enjoyed my time here and I've be in awe of the incredible intelligence and wit of the people here, truly. If I stay, it's only going to escalate, because I wouldn't give you a second chance to be rude and it would be disruptive to the others. Work on your party manners, sir. ~Barbara Inman

Barrelhse February 4, 2011 at 11:12 am

Relax, Barbara. I was dishing on your "used to learn", and all in good fun. Maybe you never used the term "Talk much?" among your friends as an adolescent. I thoroughly enjoy your posts here, and I'm sorry you mistook my reply.

Barbara_i February 6, 2011 at 4:25 am

I apologize to you. I am too highly sensitive. In my time as an "adolescant" we used terms like, "God, that fucking Mastondon can run really fast, eh?" Yeah, we were McCain's age and Canadian.

I've been here since September. I've never been in such awe of a group of amazing people. I lurked forever before I had the nuts to post. If I didn't hold you all in such high esteem I would just barf and run. My palms sweat, just thinking about speaking to ya'll and I have big boobies.

I'm going to awaken tommorow and part my hair on the other side and be my Jan Brady alter ego and pretend to be cool. Wait, she had an afro. Shit, they don't sell afro wigs in New Mexico. Grr, I can't be Hispanic, I am not cool enough to roll my rrrr's.

I'm pasty white, 48 years-old, and hypersensitive. I will try to be a better person. If I apply myself, maybe this change will happen, I dunno, sometime around halftime during the Super Bowl.

PuckStopsHere February 5, 2011 at 9:58 am

Say, please don't you leave us. You are a gifted and talented commentator and I think this may have been a simple misunderstanding. Don't make me cry…

ifthethunderdontgetya February 4, 2011 at 9:40 am

But Barbara, Dave Broder and Dana Milbank say he's really, really smart.

So it must be true, right?
~

Ducksworthy February 4, 2011 at 9:45 am

Just not in the human sense.

mumbly_joe February 4, 2011 at 8:57 am

Paul Ryan is America's Hurricane Katrina.

weejee February 4, 2011 at 8:59 am

Ah the joys of riding to the hounds riding the hound. But kneads moar woofz.

Monsieur_Grumpe February 4, 2011 at 9:00 am

If truth in advertising were enforced, Richer, Whiter and Emptier would be the Republican Party’s slogan.

Radiotherapy February 4, 2011 at 9:02 am

I bought a few clips of ammo for my gun, and then told my wife and kids we won't eat at Applebee's on Tuesdays anymore. Presto, magic, family budget balanced.

mumbly_joe February 4, 2011 at 9:05 am

Man, that's a lot better than me. I tore my metrocard in half, quit my job providing health care and doing medical research, and refused to let brown people into my apartment. So now I'm unemployed, and homeless.

Radiotherapy February 4, 2011 at 9:20 am

But you're safe in "the greatest country in the world."

weejee February 4, 2011 at 9:28 am

Where Ike's interstate system also provides public housing. These oases are sometimes know as overpasses.

BerkeleyBear February 4, 2011 at 10:05 am

Right up until they collapse for completely forseeable and preventable reasons and crush the huddled masses underneath. Not only a literal object lesson for the poorz, but a nice metaphor for the financial collapse the GOP still insists no one saw coming.

gef05 February 4, 2011 at 9:24 am

Make sure you get cancer – preferably from drinking contaminated city water.

Then you're a _real_ 'Merkan.

Mumbletypeg February 4, 2011 at 10:04 am

Enjoying your mumblings this a.m., Mr. M. o/t hope it's not true about the jobless bit. And that wherever your park bench that you spend the chilly nights, is at least not too far from a purveyor of rye ale.

mumbly_joe February 4, 2011 at 3:22 pm

Nah, actual real life is more or less fine, which is why I threw in a reference to refusing to let myself into my own apartment. The worst thing was just having to take a part-time tutoring job on account of not getting a cost of living adjustment this year; the hilarious thing about working at a hospital is that we're also on the receiving side of a lot of the systemic ass-hattery, since insurers also love to reduce compensation as part of their race to the bottom, not to mention the various threats about disbanding Medicaid entirely floating around of late.

Barrelhse February 4, 2011 at 9:03 am

As laughably ignorant as these pigfuckers show themselves to be, why do they hold any sway?
H.L. Mencken gains my esteem daily.

sodomite February 4, 2011 at 9:04 am

Paul Ryan: yet more proof that one should NEVER trust a man with two first names.

Oblios_Cap February 4, 2011 at 9:08 am

NEVER trust a man with two first names.

They're simply murderers; it takes three names to make a serial killer.

Terry February 4, 2011 at 9:14 am

Except Ru Paul, who is fierce.

vulpes82 February 4, 2011 at 9:34 am

And yet he makes you lip synch FOR YOUR LIFE weekly.

charlesdegoal February 4, 2011 at 9:36 am

"Ru" is a first name? as in Ru Morgue Avenue?

Terry February 4, 2011 at 9:41 am

He also starred in the Golden Girls, but with a silver wig.

Ducksworthy February 4, 2011 at 9:48 am

Yep. Some crazy women there.

OneDollarJuana February 4, 2011 at 10:24 am

Right. Only three kinds of people have three names. Presidents, serial killers, and pretentious authors.

trampndirtdown February 4, 2011 at 10:14 am

Who you should never trust is someone with a last name for a first name and a first name for a last name. I'ma looking at you Rand Paul.

DashboardBuddha February 4, 2011 at 9:06 am

I have wracked my brain to come up with something snarky/funny, but I can't. Maybe I'm just too appalled.

Monsieur_Grumpe February 4, 2011 at 9:46 am

It is called Reality Brain Lock. The only known cure, albeit temporary, is drinking. Good luck!

Lost_Teabaggers February 4, 2011 at 6:16 pm

Not to jump into your business, but seriously after enduring 12 years of these assholes and 8 years of Bush how can they possibly suprise you? Myself, personally I'm just shocked the dildos haven't tried to privatize social security again, but the year is young…..

It's good though that the Demos seem to be holding tight, all we need right now is for Republicans to let out some more rotten egg farts and the Demos to do their usual and say "ooh, gimme a smell" Also, isn't it amazing that none of their policy cuts have anything to do with their own ineffecient, corporate handout policies like Medicare Advantage? Oh yeah…I forgot when Obama wanted to cut that horribly over-expensive big health insurance handjob the GOP rallied olds who don't know jack shit about the program to say "git yer gubmint hands off ma medicare!" but anyway….the sun also rises and Republicans are hypocritical, pick-on-the-poor uber-pricks yet again.

Terry February 4, 2011 at 9:08 am

I hope Karl Rove's afterlife is spent in Hell up to his neck in polluted stinking water with unknown submerged beasties and demons bumping into him and biting him, while oil burns all around him on the surface of the water and rescue helicopters fly by, never seeing him. ForEVER.

Terry February 4, 2011 at 9:12 am

Paul Ryan is going to have a special goddamn place in Hell, too.

SorosBot February 4, 2011 at 9:32 am

Well going by the Inferno, as a traitor to his country Rove would be buried up to his chin within the frozen lake of Cocytus near the center of hell.

BerkeleyBear February 4, 2011 at 10:07 am

Yeah, but I think Dante would also recast him as either a false power figure (anti-Pope, anyone) or pederast for his collective buggering of us all. So pooping out his entrails and/or pitchforks up the ass.

At least, that's what I like to hope.

widestanceroman February 4, 2011 at 10:20 am

Yes, but which chin?

DemmeFatale February 4, 2011 at 12:51 pm

Oo! Oo! Oo!
Terry: do the afterlife for Glenn, Rush, Ann, Sean, Bill, and (of course) Sarah!

Beowoof February 4, 2011 at 2:14 pm

The wonderful irony is that these guys have never really read the Bible that they use against the American people on a regular basis. Thus, they have no idea what gets you into hell. So they are out digging their own way into the after life of torture and pain. I would love to be an observer of their last cruise down the river Styx.

Lost_Teabaggers February 4, 2011 at 6:53 pm

Yeah…especially watching Sarah try to grift her way out of it by attempting to seduce Charon with "want to know what it feels like when hell freezes over? Come fuck me" which would probably get her a "snowslut, please" (Yes I know, I ought to be a screenwriter with such command of dialogue…I can't be any worse than whoever keeps writing those mummy and transformer movies, though)

slithytoves February 4, 2011 at 9:11 am

“Census Finds Hurricane Katrina Left New Orleans Richer, Whiter, Emptier.”

You can say the same about all whores, except the richer part.

Lost_Teabaggers February 4, 2011 at 6:54 pm

If that's true where is racist shitbag uncle Davey going to go to get his shitty diapers changed, anymore? Seeing as how just like uber-racist Strom Thurmond he likes his hookers black and everyone with money white.

mavenmaven February 4, 2011 at 9:12 am

More foreign wars! Increases employment, money for companies to rebuild the invaded country, and kills off a generation of potential college and then medicare users a generation from now! Worked so well for Bush& Co! Yay Repub team!

freakishlywrong February 4, 2011 at 9:12 am

Obvs. Mr. Ryan, (R-Cornhole), isn't paying much attention to news. People don't react well to the cream only rising to the top. If these assholes TOUCH my Social Security I'm going to go Amenhotep on their asses.

Where are the Jobs™?

OneDollarJuana February 4, 2011 at 10:26 am

What are you talking about? The American people have been voting to have the cream rise to the top since 1980. I believe that they are only going to realize this when they also realize they are swimming in the sour milk at the bottom.

SorosBot February 4, 2011 at 9:13 am

Hey, I know a way to save a couple hundred thousand a year: eliminate Paul Ryan's salary and expenses.

Seriously, go fuck yourself, you evil douchebag.

gef05 February 4, 2011 at 9:26 am

So, you're on the fence on this one, Soros?

SorosBot February 4, 2011 at 9:41 am

The GOP plan to basically rob from the poor to give to the rich is just infuriating; and the fact that the fuckstain wants to increase the Pentagon budget, which actually is a waste of money that should be scaled back, proves once again that the "balance the budget" excuse is just pure bullshit.

mumbly_joe February 4, 2011 at 9:47 am

To be fair, he's only really increasing the budget by roughly the amount of taxpayer money the Pentagon lost in the couch cushions between Iraq and Afghanistan. What did you think he was going to do, demand better accounting practices for tax dollars going overseas or a de-escalation in our involvement in those two money-sink quagmires, as a way to reduce expenses? That's not fiscal responsibility, cutting funds from our only real avenues for future economic growth is.

gef05 February 4, 2011 at 9:48 am

Any excuse will serve a tyrant.

~Aesop

GOPCrusher February 4, 2011 at 12:39 pm

Sadly, this has been the plan since Reagan was still somewhat coherent. And now we have an entire generation that seem to believe that his is the True Path. Everytime you hear someone say that 'The problem isn't that government doesn't tax enough, but it spends too much" just go ahead and tack "on American citizens" at the end of that statement.
Its beyond infuriating.

Lost_Teabaggers February 4, 2011 at 7:04 pm

Yes you know if Republicans were even halfway serious about cutting the deficit they wouldn't just try to defund programs they and their delusional, milky white voting base hate because they think only lazy minorities use them. They'd take a comprehensive approach of spending cuts and tax increases like every other halfway responsible industrial country has done. By spending cuts I don't mean cut services because you hate minorities and am convinced they recive more of them than you do, I mean cut the pentagon by 1/3rd which has been well established as waste, raise taxes on the rich and cut out every single corporate tax avoidance loophole. Which again, is the responsible thing to do because anyone who knows anything about the budget and debt can tell you…this country wasn't much in debt before Reaganomics. So the logical position to take is we won't be much in debt after we get rid of Reaganomics…but that's just logic and as anyone will tell you, logic has a liberal bias.

horsedreamer_1 February 4, 2011 at 9:15 am

& he Rand, he Rand so far away… Gotta get away!

Oblios_Cap February 4, 2011 at 9:18 am

Someone hijacked a Greyhound bus and took it for a burn cruise around North Carolina! And then this bus terrorist was tasered, probably brutally, by policemen. Speaking of which, remember when “a Greyhound Canada bus passenger repeatedly stabbed and then decapitated a young man who was sitting and sleeping beside him"

The GOP's case against mass transit in a nutshell.

bureaucrap February 4, 2011 at 10:08 am

but greyhound is a private company, so if it wants to cater to a customer base of decapitators, it ought to be able to without any pesky regulations like, "passengers must not murder each other while crossing state lines."

SenileAgitation February 4, 2011 at 9:19 am

Ryan's plan makes sense. We already outspend Russia, China, golly everybody combined in military outlay, so it's pretty reasonable to add to our lead, in case. That way we won't be funding internal parasites who add nothing and just take, take, take. Infrastructure is for the weak. All patriots support increasing defense spending or do you hate your country so much that you'd rather see us cringe under the sandal of Islam?

mumbly_joe February 4, 2011 at 9:39 am

And if the poor start rioting in the streets, it's because of Muslim Brotherhood, not the thing where they don't have food or healthcare or homes, so that really means we haven't given homeland security enough money yet.

horsedreamer_1 February 4, 2011 at 10:17 am

Nation of Islam, in U.S. America, Q.E.D.

(I am honestly still shocked the government didn't use 9/11 to crack-down on domestic brown "agitators".)

mereoblivion February 4, 2011 at 9:22 am

Greyhound dude just wanted to get to the "Democrat" convention a little early so he could practice his marksmanship.

baconzgood February 4, 2011 at 9:24 am

"All right everyone stay calm. We're taking this Greyhound bus to Mexico….This will all be over in 78 thousand hours when we get there"

PublicLuxury February 4, 2011 at 9:26 am

Republicans aren't smart, so anything sounding school-y has to go; but anything sounding war-y must stay. Guns are the answer to all questions left unanswered after tax cuts.

vulpes82 February 4, 2011 at 9:32 am

But getting your fartbox tongue-punched feels GOOD! From what I remember, anyway. It's been a while.

Not_So_Much February 4, 2011 at 9:33 am

I thought Paul was much bigger than this offensive shit? And had a big, blue ox too?

mumbly_joe February 4, 2011 at 9:34 am

The Republican party: trading the War on Poverty for the War on the Poor since 1980.

Radiotherapy February 4, 2011 at 9:49 am

Brings to mind a Wilco favorite: War on War.

Weenus299 February 4, 2011 at 10:28 am

It's the second war on the poor, at least. The period 1920-1933 was not filled with fantastical poordom victory.

Radiotherapy February 4, 2011 at 10:40 am

Or as Beck calls them, " The Glory Years."

GOPCrusher February 4, 2011 at 12:41 pm

Mister, we could use a man like Herbert Hoover again……….

CapeClod February 4, 2011 at 9:40 am

It just makes so much sense. We have to vastly overprotect a country that is crumbling on the inside.

Ducksworthy February 4, 2011 at 9:57 am

Here's an idea. Lets hire barbarians to defend the empire. i hear the Visigoths are available. And they're relatively cheap.

SorosBot February 4, 2011 at 10:19 am

We can follow the Chinese model, and build a big fucking wall to keep us safe.

Oh wait, some politicians actually want us to do just that, despite the fact that it's an incredibly stupid idea; not to mention a waste of money.

CapeClod February 4, 2011 at 10:28 am

Yeah but they never wipe their feet before they come inside.

Weenus299 February 4, 2011 at 10:26 am

What we really need are more glass buildings full of spies.

EatsBabyDingos February 4, 2011 at 9:46 am

[ominous Hollywood voice with creepy music...]

"There's a new lumberjack in town named Ryan, Paul "Bunyan" Ryan," and he has an ax to grind and a big orange Ox with a boner."

Ducksworthy February 4, 2011 at 9:50 am

The TeaTard Revolution is at hand. Henceforth, the function of the federal government will be to collect taxes from the poors and deposit them directly into the bank accounts of Goldman Sacks executives.

cheaphits February 4, 2011 at 9:59 am

As per usual they are looking in the wrong place – defense spending and tax cuts are primarily responsible for the deficit. From Morgan Housel –

"In 2001, the CBO estimated $3.27 trillion in tax receipts would flow into the government's coffers in 2010. The actual number ended up being $2.14 trillion. This $1.1 trillion gap makes up over half of the total difference between the CBO's 2001 budget projection and what actually occurred in 2010. The effect is even greater when you shorten the time frame: The difference between 2010's actual deficit and budget projections made in 2006 was 63% attributable to tax shortfalls.

What type of tax revenue fell short? All of it, but taxes on individual income was the largest drop. In 2001, CBO estimated personal income taxes would draw in $1.68 trillion in 2010. In reality, it was $891 billion. Corporate tax revenue was $188 billion versus a projected $303 billion. Social insurance taxes came in at $862 billion last year, compared with 2001's projection of $1.1 trillion.

Why tax revenue has fallen short isn't a mystery — we've had tax cuts, and a deep recession. Using CBO's estimates, the 2001 and 2003 tax cuts will reduce tax revenue by $250 billion this year over what would have been collected in their absence. Other tax cuts that were part of the 2009 stimulus package reduced tax receipts by $164 billion last year.

And it's interesting to know what type of discretionary spending is surging past previous estimates. In 2001, CBO expected defense spending would come in at $390 billion in 2010. It ended up being $720 billion. This $330 billion difference makes up over 64% of the difference between projected and actual discretionary spending. Whether this has been necessary or worthwhile is a debate for another forum. The numbers, however, speak for themselves.

Here's a review: Compared with 2001's projections, tax revenue in 2010 fell $1.1 trillion short, and defense spending went $330 billion over.

Add 'em up, and you get $1.4 trillion. See where we're going here? Had tax revenue and defense spending each met CBO's 2001 projections, today's budget would effectively be balanced.

Spending in other areas has, of course, surged as well. Outlays for Social Security, unemployment benefits, and interest on the national debt — among others — were all significantly higher in 2010 than projected 10 years ago. But no two areas made as much a difference as tax revenue and defense spending."

superdave February 4, 2011 at 10:12 am

You and your "facts and figures" are no match for the wingnuts truthiness!

cheaphits February 4, 2011 at 10:39 am

I know…I hope Obama gets those reeducation camps open soon.

FraAnima February 4, 2011 at 11:13 am

All these numbers have deflated the semi-tumescent bliss that I was experiencing thinking about Paul John Wayne Ryan tongue-punching my fart box.

Thanks a lot!

hagajim February 4, 2011 at 11:43 am

You know that the CBO doesn't really know what it's talking about right? Boehner told us that.

LiveToServeYa February 4, 2011 at 10:02 am

The Republican party is like a Greyhound bus … with a spoiler.

NorthStarSpanx February 4, 2011 at 10:04 am

Have they proposed a way to just get rid of the constituency to absolve themselves of needing to provide services in the first place?

sweetcommunist February 4, 2011 at 1:02 pm

The lack of access to affordable and good quality healthcare should do the trick!

MinAgain February 4, 2011 at 10:05 am

Huh. Apparently, I've been spelling it wrong. It should be Hurricane KKKatrina.

SorosBot February 4, 2011 at 10:15 am

Kanye was right. That's not a joke; he was and it was ridiculous for the media to condemn him for stating the obvious.

mumbly_joe February 4, 2011 at 10:35 am

I only ever objected to the venue he said it at, as it gave the establishment media an easy avenue to claim he was being unserious and clownish. If he had said so in a post-telethon interview or something, he would have merely gotten blacklisted by the music industry the way the Dixie Chicks did and the way Ricky Martin did after talking about Vieques.

SorosBot February 4, 2011 at 11:48 am

But he did manage to keep his career going, probably because wasn't on quite the "speaking truth to power is treason" kick it was on 2003, and so he still gets to keep amusingly and bluntly stating uncomfortable truths that most people would rather not acknowledge; yes, Taylor Swift is an untalented hack.

GOPCrusher February 4, 2011 at 12:42 pm

George Bush still has not denied it.

prommie February 4, 2011 at 10:07 am

Whats really funny is that we will need our second amendment rights, as the GOP's Randian policies take effect. The fucksticks fail to see that welfare is not namby-pamby bleeding heart socialism, its just the most efficient, pragmatic way to deal with the fact that there will always be a bottom 10%, so to speak. Simple choice, really, you can give them $10,000 a year in welfare (through whatever program or programs), or you can spend $50,000 a year to imprison them. And of course, as your Dickensian-Randian approach really kicks in, you will have a massive increase in "desperado" type crimes, people with nothing to lose have no incentive to stay on the straight and narrow, so you will have to imprison more and more people. At $50,000 per year. Rather than $10,000 a year in social services. And society will become more violent, crime will increase, we will start to look like the third world, where the rich live in their walled, gaurded enclaves, while the poors shoot it out in their massive ghettos.

Kinda like Arizona and Nevada already are.

SorosBot February 4, 2011 at 10:14 am

We could use a good riot or two; and instead of burning their own neighborhoods, the poors should go out to the gated rich suburbs.

horsedreamer_1 February 4, 2011 at 10:20 am

This is good news… For Glenn Frey!

Oblios_Cap February 4, 2011 at 11:05 am

There you go again, making sense. Jesus hates you.

prommie February 4, 2011 at 11:59 am

Rome didn't supply the people with bread and circuses out of christian charity, the rich were buying security from the mob.

randcoolcatdaddy February 4, 2011 at 10:08 am

Bah …. who needs education or science when we can have big explosions?

Sounds like a great time to bomb Iran, by the way, or at least that's what I hear from a walrus that just scooted by.

BerkeleyBear February 4, 2011 at 10:16 am

Okay, this is going to seem off topic, but it'll get there.

Last weekend, I had the Senior Bowl on TV – don't ask why. The game is in Mobile, Alabama, and every third commercial was for either the city or county of Mobile. You know, the heart of Jeff Sessions/Teatard/small government country. Along with talking up their creation of Mardi Gras (but family friendly, explaining how unpopular it is) the commercial kept pimping local business. Which almost exclusively is government subsidized defense contract dependent manufacturing based on the commercials.

See, the GOP isn't against welfare – they just like it to result in non-unionized labor building weapons of mass destruction and buying off small towns to vote GOP forever.

elviouslyqueer February 4, 2011 at 10:55 am

Along with talking up their creation of Mardi Gras (but family friendly, explaining how unpopular it is)

Well, that and the fact that they throw Moon-Pies. Seriously, Mobile, if you're going to throw food, at least hurl things that can double as deadly weapons.

Pragmatist2 February 4, 2011 at 10:17 am

Hey! Hold it!
Who says bombing people with drones isn't a Basic Human Service?

ManchuCandidate February 4, 2011 at 10:19 am

It's not all horrible considering that many of the very services being cut are used by Teabaggers. They get what they deserve.

Weenus299 February 4, 2011 at 10:26 am

Man, when I get my returned tax money back, I am SO going to get a 1-way ticket on a Gray-Hound bus and run that fucker into a ditch.

elviouslyqueer February 4, 2011 at 10:33 am

Shorter Paul Ryan: Fuck the poors, feed 'em beans, and ship 'em off to be cannon fodder.

hollywooddood February 4, 2011 at 10:37 am

I hope all the coloreds settled in Houston.

HistoriCat February 4, 2011 at 11:08 am

We ended up with a bunch of Katrina refugees here (and there are some who blame every last crime committed in the area since then on them). But a lot of others were sent further afield – San Antonio, even Salt Lake City. And yet somehow SL,UT is still the whitest big city in America.

SaintRond February 4, 2011 at 10:49 am

Every time I look at that disgusting hairpiece I feel like I can smell his ass.

slowhansolo February 4, 2011 at 10:55 am

One of the nice things about living in the barrio is that its occupants take care of each other. Plus it will easier to tell, at a glance, during the riots, who to target from the crow's nest.

Mumbletypeg February 4, 2011 at 10:56 am

Ryan appears to be channeling Rep. Cynthia "Let them eat McDonald's" Davis*, or else hoping the plebes become starved back into military-enrollment physiqual standards: that's TWO problems, solved.

(*Whose tenure mercifully ended a month ago today, thanks to Missouri legislature term limits. Looking for good news where I can find it…)

donner_froh February 4, 2011 at 11:04 am

"the cuts would fall most heavily on transportation and housing programs; agriculture and the Food and Drug Administration; commerce, justice and science programs"

Makes sense.
Science–the bible tells us all we need about science
Justice–Scalia has that covered
Housing–Paul Ryan has a house already–doesn't everyone?
Transportation–subways already full of coloreds, Messicanos and white people who make less than 100K per year. Let them walk
FDA–as if we need that. Food and drug industries police themselves just fine
Agriculture– Food Stamp program is a Dept. of Agriculture budget item. Out it goes.

Works fine, perfectly painless if you are Rich White and Empty.

HistoriCat February 4, 2011 at 11:10 am

Where the hell was the hijacker going to go on that bus? "Take me to Tijuana!"

OC_Surf_Serf February 4, 2011 at 11:11 am

Stuck behind the Orange Curtain here in Southern California…very familiar with how 'richer' and 'whiter' equals 'emptier'.

Bluestatelibel February 4, 2011 at 11:17 am

It's true! The U.S. certainly doesn't spend enough on defense spending–just check out this handy chart: http://www.mtholyoke.edu/~jephrean/classweb/In%20...

hagajim February 4, 2011 at 11:35 am

I think the Congressman got it wrong…what it should say is

He believes the best way forward is to allocate an extra $8 billion to domestic agencies, and then cut $40 billion from Homeland Security and the Pentagon. There I think that reads about right.

But seriously, when are the fucktards going to realize that we don't live in Ronnie Raygun land anymore and we don't need to spend 10 times (or more) than any other fucking country on the military. Jesus you would think that someone with half a fucking brain could figure that out. If you reconfigure spending there will still be K street lobbyists willing to pay you – they just won't work for Boeing and SAIC. Stupid fuckers!

Gorillionaire February 4, 2011 at 11:51 am

Good grief, people, we only have THREE FUCKING AIR FORCES.

fuflans February 4, 2011 at 12:34 pm

you know i didn't remember that canadian greyhound decapitation.

awesome.

Barrelhse February 6, 2011 at 7:27 pm

Wish I could do this in private, but I'm glad (or hope) we're friends. I am 61, very irreverent, but very easy-going ( I teach Middle School because I actually get a kick out of the little hoodlums), and I admit to having a twisted sense of humor
Don't worry about yourself; I love your posts and your "take" on things- in fact, my teasing was because I like you and was "giving you attention."
I know! Let's have a beer summit! ("Four beer, eh?")

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