What would Harry Reid be doing right now if he hadn’t miraculously come back to win Senate re-election? Well, this is apparently what the second-place finisher is supposed to do: “An evening of glamour with special guest Sharron Angle.” Ah, the makeup convention. “Sharron will be sharing her beauty and makeup challenges during the campaign and how she overcame them!” A feminist call to action.
She had confidence that she would look great with 14 -16 hour days & with numerous appearances daily…so can you!
You know, Sharron Angle, you can just become a lobbyist or something. Consulting? Think tank? Write a book? Actually, we take that back. This is more respectable than any of those things.
Please be our guest… you will be glad you did!
* Girlfriend time
* Chat with Sharron
* Learn some new make-up tips & techniques
* Find out about an amazing revolutionaryskin care line (guaranteed to take 55% of your fine lines and wrinkles away in 8 weeks!) NO kidding!
* Free gift for all who attend
Sounds fun, right? I think so too!
See you there!
Yeah, still more respectable.
Did you know that so many celebrities use SeneGence that they are too numerous to list, but here are a few…
* Christina Augilera
* Kandee Johnson
(makeup artist to the stars)
* Kansas City Chief Cheerleaders
* NewYork Rockettes
* Cast of Friends (when on TV)
* Loretta Swit
* The Real Housewives of Orange County
Barely. Barely more respectable. [Political Wire]
{ 116 comments }
So she is endorsing plaster of Paris?
spackle
Skimming is the hard part, but it pays off in a smooth unmoving surface. Then you can sand!
shellack
You all are killing me.
We're not talking whore diamonds. More like whore cubic zirconias.
Depends on how what package of "girlfriend time" you're looking for
No amount of makeup will hide that amount of crazy!
Or the ugliness of her ignorance.
In fact, it only accentuates the crazy.
She didn't seem to have much of a problem making stuff up, did she?
"Sharron will be sharing her beauty and makeup challenges during the campaign and how she overcame them!”
Those weren't her worst problems; there isn't enough fish in the world to help overcome her brain cell deficit and intelligence challenges.
Well if there's one subject Sharron Angle is an expert on, it's makeup. Her approach is to makeup her own facts, makeup her own history, makeup her own Constitution…
Win!
*cough, cough*
http://wonkette.com/436566/sharron-angle-running-...
nyah, nyah!
Hey, being first isn't everything — just ask Thorfinn Karlsefni.
No, it's not "everything." But it IS a lot tighter.
Fine — you deal with the crying and the blood and the six phone calls a day asking if you're sure the condom worked. I'll gladly take second.
Did you ever worry that you looked more Asian that Latino? Now you don't have to worry with Sharron's NEW makeup tips during Girlfriend Time.
FYI: the "free gift" is deportation.
This was a highly informative piece. I had no idea Loretta Swit was still alive.
That list of "celebrities" is supposed to be an incentive to use their
products? Seriously?
I'd say she lost the battle.
Lipstick on a pig, lipstick on a pitbull, etc.
This one is too easy.
Easy? Just try getting lipstick on a bartered chicken.
I hear chicken lips are the hardest to paint.
I know that when I think of hot chicks, my mind immediately leaps to Loretta Swit and Sharron Angle.
Me too. I say to myself, "Look at the relative lack of fine lines and wrinkles that were there only eight weeks ago!"
how she
overcamesuccumbed to them! Fixed.Don't miss the Blackface/Minstrel break out group.
From what I understand, Marlo Thomas and Meredith Baxter-Birney use that stuff also.
Jan Brewer, also.
You can put lipstick on a whacko, but it's still a whacko.
*harumph*
Just can't resist the retard jokes, can you?
Dude, are you following me?
Just goofin' around amigo!
For Sharron Angle, only the finest of white lead foundations will do.
Ooh! Why not arsenic? That'll make you nice and pasty white–before it offs you.
Why not both?
That's right, tart that looney bitch up like an Elizabethan era courtisan.
"sharing her beauty and makeup challenges"
No challenge has ever been lost by a great margin.
How about this advice: don't spend hours baking yourself in the desert sun so that you look like a fried lizard and get the skin cancer.
Az Gov Jan Brewer desperately needs her help!
The SeneGence system works wonders even on faces with extensive crocodiling!
Is "crocodiling" what you do when you phone up your grandma to thank her (deceptively) for the (horrible) Christmas gift she sent you?
SeneGence may work wonders, but it can't do miracles. Jan Brewer has more and deeper cracks in her face than the Grand Canyon that mars her state.
Is Sene Gence made with 2nd Amendment solutions?
They do claim it is revolutionary…
I also hear that you apply it with a shotgun…
Photographer: Jeri Taylor-Swade strike a pose for me!
Jeri Taylor-Swade: (after striking that pose) That's the one I want. I look great. Put it on the brochure.
She overcame them? Fuck, who knew?
You should have seen the "before" picture. On second thought, best not.
Dear Sharron,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17QClkojnAw
and your ugly sister too.
yours,
4ts
Because, in the wild, mother grizzlies wear paint and powder to protect their young.
Seminar topics include:
"Get the smell of gun powder out of your hair in three easy steps"
"What to wear at a post-massacre press conference."
"The handgun safety lock is not a good accessory."
Pit bulls pluck their eyebrows?
So it's the makeup that makes 'em batshit then?
Sharron – If you want to appear more attractive to men, I recommend a muzzle and a paper bag.
In other news, Joan Rivers is going to run for Senator in Nevada.
Her face resembles a boxing glove.
If we don't feel we got our money's worth from this event, will Second Amendment remedies be available?
SeneGence is very close to senescence. I suppose it's witty but awkward, like deMENtia, the beauty product to help you attract men who don't remember the names of their families.
Just like the founding father's–a spring-loaded coon trap of 'reclaimed' slave teeth!
Is it a coincidence that she's wearing "bangs"? Long bangs?
The bangs hide the lobotomy scars.
That woman has had long bangs in years. Hell, when was the last time she had even short bangs?
"All right, Mr. Ailes, I'm ready for my close-up."
For a brief moment, I thought Obtuse Angle was the Joker.
As a straight man, I just have to say – RuPaul is way hotter.
SenesCence?
Artfully done, sir! You win a future!
(ha ha just kidding THERE IS NO FUTURE)
Oddly enough, none of the other men have said, "bathe her and bring her to me!" Her make up tips must not be working.
Needs more concealer–cuz we can still see her.
Ru only shares those with his sisters Ron and Rand.
If that is all it took, Sue Lowden would be our new Senator.
Just when and where the fuck did she overcome her frumpy genes?
"Girlfriend time"? I didn't think Craigslist accepted this kind of ad anymore.
Fine, I'll get my cold cream gun.
I presume the bulk of this discussion falls into the "Challenges" category?
Harry Reid's beauty secrets for surviving 14-16 hour days on a winning campaign? Ivory soap, Head & Shoulders shampoo, and work 18 hours.
Heeelllooooo, WWiilllbburrr… Neeeiiigh!
So- the cast of "Friends" won't be caught wearing this stuff when they're not on TV?
teh palin will be pissed off! teh angle is honing in on teh disposable incomes of the republitards.
I think her makeup makes her look a little more Asian to me.
Remember that one? http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/10/18/sharron-... Good times.
Sharron Angle make-up tip: Hope the entire audience is completely blind!! Doesn't matter how much spackle I put on my face, it is still hideously grotesque. So just hope you are making a campaign appearance with the local braille society.
You know you're in trouble when your cosmetologist also specializes in collision repair. "Looks like we're going to need a couple of aftermarket quarter-panels on that one".
Lipstick on a Gorgon.
Sister Act?
http://www.thegrio.com/assets_c/2010/10/Sharron-A...
http://image3.examiner.com/images/blog/replicate/...
http://popculture4fun.com/images/clash_of_the_tit...
Kinda like the picture of Dorian Gray, except the painting still looks fabulous!
Screw the makeup, Sharron! Make lemonade. Ugly, wrinkled, wild-eyed lemonade.
Can't really get a good snark on this one, but: numerous appearances daily? Wasn't part of her problem that she refused to make appearances, talk to reporters, so on and so forth?
Anyway, carry on.
Yes.
"Beauty and makeup challenges?" That's an understatement.
SeneGence is the division of InGen that cranks out these crazy teabag ladies on Isla Nutbar, using a mosquito that bit Carrie Nation and got trapped in amber.
Nerd!
Angle giving "beauty" tips makes sense in the right-wing world where Bristol Palin can give advice on avoiding teen pregnancy; next we'll have Christine O'Donnel's guide to pubic hygiene.
I can see her doing Viva for the Beva ads.
Christine O'Donnell: Come for the surf-and-turf; stay for the crabs.
!
Wait 'til the attendees find out that Sharron bathes in the blood of virgin Girlscouts. That could put a crimp in sales.
Definitely more sow's ear than silk purse!
Loretta Swit!
Oh yeah? Come here and prove it!
Beat me to it.
Next Week: Sharon Angle's Vagazzling Secrets
Does it involve a cucumber and Crisco.
That photo? Did someone knock her down on the asphalt?
What's next??? Christine O'Donnell sharing the secrets of how to fly on a broom???
I was thinking Bic for the Beaver ads. You know a portable razor for the moments when you need to thin the forest.
You are more kind than I am, as my proposal would have been to set her face on fire and put it out with a shovel.
Why are the Houston Rocket's cheerleaders called the, "NewYork Rockettes?"
I know I always make the TOUCHDOWN! signal when I complete my make-up.
Earl Schieb is a fucking miracle worker.
Such conflicting emotions. I hate that she's only reinforcing to Repugnicants that they can dictate what women should do, what they can do, while all they can offer is a pretty face.
But at the same time, if this is all she's gonna do – if she's not gonna say anything more than this or appear in public in any capacity other than this – then I really wish Palin, Bachmann and O'Donnell would do this and only this too.
(i)"Sharron will be sharing her beauty and makeup challenges during the campaign and how she overcame them!”(/i)
Wait a minute. She overcame them?
Looked into the company. It's basically a makeup MLM, the white trash version of Mary Kay. Super!
"amazing revolutionaryskin care line"
Arpaio McCain bukake?
She looks like she's been hit in the face by a wok, but what's really a turnoff is her middle school haircut.
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