Hey, did you hear Ronald Reagan’s 100th birthday is next month? Of course you didn’t. You’ve been too busy fasting and praying to Ronald Reagan because OF COURSE HIS BIRTHDAY IS NEXT MONTH. So how would Ronald Reagan like Time magazine to celebrate this occasion of the utmost cosmic importance? “Do you think he would want to be photoshopped onto a magazine cover yukking it up with his political nemesis?” No, probably not. But wait! Look at that cover! They made Reagan put his arm around the Kenyan! This is VERY OFFENSIVE, and now Ronald Reagan will return to destroy the world and rapture the true believers.
So it’s offensive to print cartoons depicting Mohammed but THIS is okay? What a bunch of hypocrites the liberal media are.
It’s no secret that since the November 2010 “shellacking” the Obama loving media has been desperately trying to re-brand Captain Priorities as a practical centrist but this is ridiculous. Consider two key coincidences…
1. Reagan’s 100th birthday celebration is happening in… February 2011.
2. Obama’s new press secretary used to work for…. TIME Magazine.
Hmm! Somebody call Nancy Reagan. Tell her to bring the Ouija board.
If TIME Magazine had a shred of integrity or credibility, it might have featured the keynote speaker of Reagan’s 100th birthday celebration on the cover. Can you guess who it is? I assure you it’s not Obama.
Yes, it’s Sarah Palin! The thing about Sarah Palin is that she is more Ronald Reagan than Ronald Reagan, as every once in a while, Ronald Reagan would do something that goes against conservatives’ current conception of Lord Reagan. Whoops, blasphemy! We will be burning in Reagan Hell, under the spiteful watch of the Reagan Satan, Tip O’Neill. [American Glob? Hah!]
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Run Mr. President! Zombie Reagan will eat your brains!
I am sure Regan is looking up at this and asking WTF?
With his pre-Alzheimer's brain.
And then Ron-Ron looks up and says "OOOOOOOOhhhh look mommy, we're going to have a minstrel show!!! Goody!!1!"
Then Satan has some satyrs come in and rape him again.
No, Regan is probably spinning her head around, spitting up the pea soup, and saying "Your mother sucks cocks in hell!" to the TIME staff.
My understanding is that Nancy was the star cock sucker in that family.
Game recognize game.
Reagan would more likely put his arm around Obama than a snow hick from Wasilla.
That was my thought, as well. As much as I disliked Reagan, this rewritting of history is making him out to be WORSE.
Reagan would not just put his arm around that "snow hick" but give her a big hug. He'd put his arm around Obama's throat…
http://exm.nr/grXAkB
Briebart continues to be incoherent.
It's that soft cheese between Briebart's ears.
Soft cheese? Is that the kind spread on crackers?
There are many things you can do, but that doesn't mean you should.
So, no. Smegma is not that kind.
Man…Smegma. That character was really scary in Lord of the Rings!
Sorta like saying rice continues to be white.
Let's combine the two: Briebart continues to be white.
What is this "TIME", some paper printout of a comic book?
What is this "Reagan," some cardboard cutout of a president?
"fortunately for you, not too many people I know… read your little Time magazine, or whatever it's called."
-D. Zoolander-
When I was a teen, it used to be marketed under the title, "MAD".
Needz moar muslin
Which one is Reagan? He and Obama kinda look alike these days. Just kidding, one of them is a secret Muslim who wants to destroy America … and the other one is Obama.
Ask zombie Reagan where the gift certificate is. Clearly he was involved in the mystery flight to kenya and the zombie obama birth on the moon, since the image of Reagan never lies.
He's not riding a giant crying eagle, so I know that's a fake photo of Reagan.
The only person I know still reading Time is my 90-year old dad, and even he thinks it's dumb and boring.
I still subscribe. I read it until I encounter the word "Palin", then it goes into the recycling bin. Lately it's been going in unread a lot.
Obama ♥ Reagan? Except for possibly, I don't know, ALL of his ideology. Fuck you, villagers.
Palin's a good choice for the keynote speech, as she doesn't even need the Alzheimer's to be fellow drooling idiot.
Does Sarah have alzheimers, too?
It would be impossible to tell.
She never had much of a mind to lose.
Alzheimer's? I know this is Wonkette, but that's just a little bit too far, don't you think? I mean, just because someone has an inability to think rationally that makes most of what they say sound like gibberish, it doesn't mean they are as completely useless as Sarah Palin.
No. Alzheimer's disease would make her occasionally say something that was true.
"Yes, it’s Sarah Palin! The thing about Sarah Palin is she is more Ronald Reagan than Ronald Reagan"
Palin would raise taxes higher than Reagan did?
So, Zombie Reagan likes dark meat, huh?
I am sure Jodie Foster is not impressed.
Now that's the kinda snark I'm talkin' about.
To be fair, Zombie Ronnie thought he had his arm around Sammy Davis Jr.
"Sammy, you tell Frankie he'd better keep his hands off Nancy, or I'm gonna kick his skinny guido ass…"
"I believe in states' rights…. I believe we have distorted the balance of our government today by giving powers that were never intended to be given in the Constitution to that federal establishment" 1980 Neshoba County Fair.
Reagan in 1960: "Medicare is evil socialism!"
Reagan in 1980: "Where's my Medicare?"
Reagan in King's Row: "Where is the rest of me?"
Reagan in Reykjavik, Iceland: "Where am I?"
I can understand why Sarah is the keynote speaker at ReaganOrgy '11 (TM). They were both prone to say stupid shit and both have brain problems.
What's this Time magazine? Is it for adults? I'm confused because it seems real boring, but also uses the "heart" symbol.
Did it originally read, "Why Obama "heart's" Reagan…LOLZ"
scratch my eyes out.
All Obama needs now is a.Cheney on the Administration.
Don't give him any ideas!!!!
~
You know, I never believed the Teahadis when they said Obama was trying to destroy America, but now that I've seen this…
Look at that: The confused old white man just thought the black man was bringing his car around. Once they both realized the mistake, they laughed and laughed.
And then the old white man went to speak to country club management to see what could be done about this … problem.
It is not adequate. Obamar isn't even wearing his turban and holding a mail bomb or an automatic weapon or a grenade launcher. Very bad photoshopping.
Terrorist fist bump or they ain't p's….
Reagan isn't even the right size! They made him SHORTER than Obama. This is a mortal sin and is punishilbe by death directly from the Jeebu. Reagan was AT LEAST 8 feet taller than Obama. Accurate pictures would have Obama crotch level with the 'zipper'.
He'd also have his massive wang out just to intimidate the colored boy.
the gipper zipper, that is.
Following in the long distinguished line of very tall Commanders in Chief starting with Washing-ton, 6-foot-8, weighs a fucking ton.
How anyone can get to be past 18 years old in this country and still think that there's any value in paying attention to Time magazine is beyond me.
Your standards are so high you must wander in continual bafflement.
If they had just asked Nancy first they would have seen rom Obama's Kenyan Natal Chart that his Pluto trines Reagan's Uranus and that always spells disaster.
Ugh, don't click on link. I waded into the cesspool they call "comments". Ugh.
I can't think of anyone more qualified or appropriate to headline this event…with the possible exception of the inestimable Rush Limbaugh. Ugh…
I think this cover is really really funny. The right wing will react like we puked on their birthday cake. I love it.
Someone at Time, assuming that it more than a one man operation, will pay hell for that blasphemous use of St. Ronnie's image.
I'm for anything that will give these people a hissy fit.
I bet Rush O'Beck-Sean heads just pulled a "Scanners" seing that photograph. Ohhhhh, to be a fly on the wall.
The Gipper heard "Hussein" and assumed it was "that nice Iraqi fella who needed all those chemicals fer………what was it again?…….oh yeah….pest control…that's what he said……"
or as the Reight might say "Wish we still had dose chemicals to keep Dem cockroaches down…." Think of all the 9mm bullets they could save…
It's only fitting that The Great Communicator be lauded by the The Great Refudiator. As to the cover, I can hear Reagan say, "Come on, boy, give us a little song and dance."
Well…
There you go again….
Ron Reagan, Jr., does this pitch perfect. Which kind of makes sense.
Sarah Palin, rips open Ronald Reagan's coffin, to crawl in and have necro-sex with him in….4, 3, 2, 1…………………
It's times like these that I wish I hadn't been banned from commenting at Big Government yet.
I was wondering why your P was slowly going up.
http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/ABPub/2009/06/02...
NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! Not Nancy. She's so pure.
Yoda looks good in red.
Poor thing was halfway home before she realized her purse was gone.
I had no idea Fred Astaire knew that nice colored fellow.
Why not just photoshop Reagan giving Obama a blowjob. That would be funny and I might just buy a copy of that shitty magazine.
I assumed that Time's editors were being racist against Obama since they intentionally left the "s" off of the heart so that the headline reads "Obama love Reagan" with that variant usage of the verb, in this case "to love", being recognizably typical of ebonics. Deny it if you want but Q.E.D., racist bitches.
Will you please finally explain "Q.E.D." to me? Yes, I have hit up the Holy Trinity (Google/Wiki/Urban Dick) but I still don't get it.
"Quod erat demonstrandum" Basically, "thus it is demonstrated". Something you might find at the end of one of Thales' proofs in a Latin translation of his "Geometry". The phrase in its acronymic form was adopted widely, I believe, during the enlightenment as a sort of argument ending punctuation in mathematics but also in other areas of science and philosophy. And of course, Thomas Dolby used the full phrase in his hit "She Blinded me with Science" singing "quod erat demonstrandum, baby."
Ha! Thanks very much. Of course, being a Dolby fan from way back (I used to play a loungy version of "Airwaves" on piano), I fact-checked you, and it was in the song "Airhead", not "Science."
It makes me cringe when, during GOP primary debates, they actually start saying things like "you are not truly Reagan, I am more Reagan than you."
Kinda makes me giggle. "No folks, I'm the bigger asshole who smiles a lot and says everything's going to be better. Who has two thumbs and will buy and sell weapons to appropriately named freedom-fighting groups? This guy."
I served with Ronald Reagan, I knew Ronald Reagan, Ronald Reagan was a friend of mine. You're no Ronald Reagan.
It's only a matter of time until someone utters this phrase.
Just when I was wondering how $arah would be victimized by this, BAM!
This would be more credible if Barry were as far Left as Ronny Raygun. If the Gipper were in politics today, he'd be vilified by the Right for liking Messicans too much, gun control, negotiating with terrists — all that stuff that, um, is against liberty, or whatever.
Yes kind of interesting what conservatives choose to not talk about, isn't it? Every time the 1986 amnesty is brought up they hilariously avoid the subject or blame it on the Democrats. This would make their blood boil too…Reagan kept a framed picture of FDR on his desk and considered him his most admired President. It's kind of hilarious how much revision is required to turn Raygun in to Palin. Of course the real truth is they're revising everything to make Raygun into Bush which is who Palin and her word salad emulates politically.
Hell conservatives at the time thought Reagan's first summit with Gorbachev and nuclear arms reductions was a betrayal; now instead they just pretend that it never happened, and believe that Ronnie magically forced the Soviet Union to collapse on itself after he left office by willpower with his "tear down this wall" speech.
Reagan also passed a law explicitly making torture a crime in the US of A.
Raised taxes, also.
Reagan = RINO!
Zombie Reagan: "Are you one of my sons? I can never remember those boys."
Them damn commies even airbrushed Gipp's flag pin out!
This cover is not antithetical to harmony.
So it must be thetical to dissension. Also or something.
Salmon!
It looks like a movie poster for a remake of Blazing Saddles.
WHAM!
Why Obama Hearts Reagan? Hallucinogens.
They both need cigarettes hanging out of their mouths.
And in a heartbreakingly accurate moment for Time, Obama is standing to the right of Reagan. Because of Change. And Hope.
That's like saying the '00s Patriots are to the right of the '70s Steelers. You gotta play the game in the era you're given.
Which is cool, if the whole idea of governing a nation is about winning elections. Which I guess it is, but it really oughtn't be. Because having income disparity levels that would make a 70s South American dictator blush may be just fine in today's political environment, but that doesn't make it any more right than it was 35 years ago, when one could talk about such things.
The lower percentiles have hardly ever yelled the safe word throughout 50 years of floggings, piercings and humiliation–given the choice, they usually consent to the kink. So who are we to judge what goes on between consenting citizens and their masters? Do you want the rich to just give it up missionary-style?
(Prize goes to whoever comments with the obvs punchline I've left out.)
"Just close your eyes & think of Germany?"
No green balloons reference?
"If TIME Magazine had a shred of integrity or credibility, they might have featured the keynote speaker of Reagan’s 100th birthday celebration on the cover. Can you guess who it is? I assure you it’s not Obama. "
Yeah, but then Time would have to change the headline to Dumb and Dumber, which would lead to a messy lawsuit.
What happened to Ronnie's left arm? It's not joined at the shoulder any more, and seems to have gotten about six inches longer. Death will do that.
Peggy Noonan hopes that Obama's love of Reagan will somehow given her another speechwriting gig. Don't hold your breath, one thing the man can do is give a speech.
and now Ronald Reagan will return to destroy the world and rapture the true believers.
May 21! I can hardlly wait!
Hmm. Well I can think of one thing that Reagan, Palin, and Big Government have in common other than conservatism. Can you guess what it is? I can assure you it's not intelligence.
Hating black people.
They want there salary to derive from it?
"Reagan will return to destroy the world…" I love that image. Jacob Marley meets Shiva wearing a heavy set of chains decorated with the shrunken heads of all the casualties of our foreign policy "adventures". Titanic Reagan/Marley/Shiva strides through the American landscape stooping to pick up terrified Republicans fleeing on their hoverounds. Just before he pinches their heads off he whispers lovingly to each of them "Once I passed my eyes were opened and I felt the weight of this chain that I had forged. Truly it is mourning in America for our innocence was lost long ago and now we must all pay." Or something like that.
"Mr. or Ms. Ruhe, I represent the Lord. He's greenlighted a sequel to 'Revelations,' and we'd like you to submit a treatment."
I caught their act at the Catskills Comedy Cabin back in '83. They were hi-larious!
Reagan: "A strapping young buck goes a lot further than it used to, amirite? Thank you, thank you! I'll be here all week! You've been a swell audience — try the T-bone steak, and don't forget to…forget to…uhhh…"
Obama: "Take my welfare queen…please!"
Prediction: Will be the first magazine to receive the "news shield," to protect shoppers from offensive covers, in both San Francisco and rural Red State grocery stores.
The new snivelity.
Dean looks alright, but Sammy has really let himself go.
Actually, Reagan, in a Gloria Swanson moment, believes that he is going to star in a remake of Ocean's 11, but Angie, Frank, Joey, and Angie haven't been cast yet.
He would try to send Rochester back Benny's house.
I apologize if something this obvious has already been pointed out, but in addition to being Zombie Gipper's 100th birthday month, February is also Black History Month.
Perhaps cash-strapped Time magazine was simply trying to kill 1 3/5 stories with one cover.
In unison: We begin (drone) bombing in five seconds!
They made Reagan put his arm around the Kenyan!
Actually, that's Reagan wiping his hand on Obama's back. There wasn't any hand sanitizer available.
We begin bombing in 10 seconds!
We begin bombing in five minutes!
If TIME Magazine had a shred of integrity or credibility
None of the newsmagazines have any of either do they?
President Obama has not given enough terrorists weapons to be worthy to shine Ronald Reagan's shoes.
You sure they're not the same person? You _never_ see them in the same room together…
I happened to be watching "Dark Victory" last night. Ronnie was under-acting as much as Bette Davis was over-acting. The man cannot even portray a drunkard in a believable manner.
"now Ronald Reagan will return to destroy the world and rapture the true believers."
I seriously wish He would hurry the fuck up.
What did the five fingers of Time say to the Teatards face? ::SLAP!!::
Why would Palin speak at Reagan's birthday celebration? I thought he didn't like women who ate food.
Zombie Reagan has risen from the grave and endorsed Obama! Take that, Limpballs!
Hey, speaking of the Dominican child raper you guys out to give us something about Leeland Yee and his epic struggle to harpoon the great white whale and drag his klansmen, Father Coughlin-esque ass off of the air. I'd just like to see Ken or Jack's thoughts on it, plus read the comments for catharsis. Otherwise, carry on
Reagan has been dead for many years. There is no way the he could have a 100th birthday next month.
Good idea, resurrecting the Gipper! Wrong guy though, Ronnie should have his arm around an armed and maniacally grinning Jared; since taking away public health initiatives for the insane was, after all, his doing.
Isn't that cute, "wonkette" and her cast of wannabes still trying to make their way in political commentary……
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