We thought it was odd the American public described Obama’s speech on Tuesday as “salmon.” But you know what? We looked back at the video, and it’s true. That whole thing was about salmon.
It’s an open question whether America can compete in the long run with other countries’ salmon. Ours tend to get eaten by bears a lot. And it will be a challenge for Obama to fund a modernized salmon infrastructure and salmon education initiatives while balancing the budget. The real difference is whether or not he will be willing to make reforms to salmon entitlements, but it doesn’t seem politically possible at the moment. Salmon think they should get water for free from the government and make no effort to provide it to themselves, and that’s not going to change in one spawning season.




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"Salmon! Salmon! Salmon!!!! It's always about Salmon!!!" sez the neglected Tuna.
I saw Greg french-kissing a Salmon once.
Wait, so Cindy is Trout, right? Would that abortion Mrs. Brady had one time because she has enough friggin' kids … is that caviar?
I don't care what anyone says, Salmon is the poor-man's Tuna, not the other way around. Suck it Salmon.
Also similarly, many in Alaska can't figure out why fishing for salmon with explosives is a bad idea in the long run.
Oh, I thought he was talking about Salman Rushdie, the author of The Satanic Verses. You would think that the fatwa ordered against him would have stopped him from following up with his other book, Buddha, You Fat Fuck!
I guess I wasn't in tuna with him, so I thought the whole thing sounded fishy, but now I see the porpoise.
Leo Gorcey called and he wants his brilliance back. Brilliance.
Walleye I think I am herring the same thing, Barracuda made it a bit clearer; by being just a bit less koi.
Honestly, all this a.m. talk about seafood is making me a bit eel.
You, sir, need to seek kelp.
With all this talk about salmon and fishing, I am surprised he did not mention Roe v. Wade.
Wow, the editing is so seamless if I didn't know better I'd think this was the actual address.
Fish heads, fish heads. Roly-poly fish heads.
EAT 'EM UP, YUM!
if you get Salmonella from chickens, do you get chickenella from salmons?
Just ask any mermaid you happen to see.
And Nutella from Michele Bachmann?
The president obviously doesn't care about neither Sam nor Ella.
I think I got vanilla from ice, once.
Chicken Of The Sea-Is it Chicken or Tuna?
I don't know, but I hear you can get nutella from teabagging.
You know who eats Salmon, right?
MAMA GRIZZLIES that's who.
So, in reality, the SOTU was actually a big come on to Wasilla's favorite cuckold.
That's right, Barry wants the horned bear to eat his "speech"
Y'all are gross.
W… T… F.
By promoting "Salmon" are we still making cunnilingus references about Kuchinich's wife?? Somebody clue me in here.
If we aren't, we should be. She's quite tongue-punchable.
She might be vulnerable now, what with Dennis's oral equipment being currently under renovation.
Salmon gulpers eat salmon – it's a dammed proper thing to do.
Are you channelling Wilford Brimley???
It's the right thing to do and the tasty way to do it.
Dead salmon go with the flow, also.
It's salmon
I'm eatin' salmon wid you!
It's salmon (salmon, salmon, salmon)
And I hope you like salmon, too!
Ain't no rules, ain't no law, we can grill it anyhow:
I and I will cook it through,
'Cos everyday it's tastin' nice, served up with a little rice,
Salmon 'til the salmon's through!
With jah-smine rice-tafari.
Wow, I'm losing points for this? Fuck you rude boys, light a spliff and it's funnier.
We're in the middle of the makings of a melted butter salmon…
Just the Breitbart trolls passing through again, sucking pee.
But I don't like salmon!
Sshh, dear, don't cause a fuss. I'll have your salmon. I love it. I'm having salmon, salmon,salmon,salmon,salmon,salmon,salmon,salmon,salmon, salmon and salmon.
It's no secret that smoked salmon is controlled by the Jews.
Only with a 'shmear' cream-cheese.
After this precedent, President Palin will think nothing of making endless speeches about the humane killing of halibut in a boat with her daughter on a TV show that,sadly, is no mas.
As Bill Daley says: "The Interior Department is in charge of salmon while they’re in fresh water, but the Commerce Department handles them in when they’re in saltwater. I hear it gets even more complicated once they’re smoked.”
Indeed it does, Bill. Indeed it does.
I tried to smoke a salmon once, but it was damn hard finding rolling papers that were big enough and the thing wouldn't light anyhow. Major buzzkill.
At least it wasn't leftover.
A big threat to America is the bear. Bears are a threat to salmon. Therefore, we need to have bear death panels and abortions to save America.
The downfister troll thinks there is something very fishy about our comments.
~
Woman: How did we all die at the same time?
Grim Reaper: The Salmon Moose.
Hey, I didn't even eat the mousse..
Salmon goes out, salmon goes in. You can't explain that.
Bears. They're godless salmon killing machines.
Urp!
They're like the Nazis of the Animal Kingdom, even.
Does Boner need to eat salmon, to maintain his orange coloration?
…do you think that Hue comes easy?
After I removed the scales from my eyes, I too realized his speech was directed to the voters of Alaska, and in particular to Sarah Palin. The message: Sarah, you are gonna get smoked in the next election.
Praise to the Sara person. Her beautifully scripted response was…'WTF!' Who can hate her?
Hey, now; that's not civility transcendent!
Won't somebody puh-leeeeze think of the salmon ?!?!
Salmon enchanted evening.
You can't beat Kip Addotta's "Wet Dream"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6l1GvDWtccI
Hello!….a Salmon is a LOX! A Lox is a complete waste of time and just lies there being completely clueless and smoked. (As in certain political programs)
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