it's morning in america

Obama Wins the Morning: 92% Who Watched Approved!

  • I am, I am, I am Superman, and I can do anything ....Granted, this is limited to people who admitted to watching the State of the Union, but those who did say they overwhelmingly approved of the mish-mash of Sputnik and Spending Cuts and “Clean Coal” that Obama presented to the nation as maybe some way that people might eventually get a job in America. 92% is a true Win the Morning/Future! A CNN poll found that 84% of those who watched had either a very positive or “somewhat positive” tingle down their leg after watching the SoTU, and a group of swing voters surveyed by another polling company went from 30% approval of Obama to 56% approval of Obama after simply watching the speech. Magic? We are going to have to go with “magic,” because if all it takes is a decently presented State of the Union with a lot of optimistic pipe dreams and cheerleading for the beloved “troops” who continue to be stuck in two awful lost causes forever because the White House and Pentagon want it that way, then magic is not limited to the wonderful world of Hogwarts and is now being practiced by our own “Hawaiian Dumbledore,” Barack Obama. [Politico/CNN/CBS News]
  • Meanwhile, in Egypt, all protests of any kind have been smashed after yesterday’s increasingly crazy riots in every major city. Will the revolt accomplish the impossible and knock the vile crook Mubarak out of power? If wearing those Guy Fawkes masks and “tweeting” makes revolution real in Our Dumb Era, then this is very very real. [Al Jazeera]
  • Oh yeah and Michelle Bachmann gave her own very special State of the Tea Party video speech, which was ignored by everyone but the desperate lamers at CNN. The New York Times notes that Bachmann was so insane during this brief, looking-everywhere-but-the-camera paranoid rant, “she seemed almost like the telekinetic high school heroine of Carrie.” [New York Times/Guardian]

About the author

A writer and editor of this website from 2006 to early 2012, Ken Layne is occassionally seen on Twitter and writes small books and is already haunting you from beyond (your) grave.

View all articles by Ken Layne
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  1. vulpes82

    I'm really not the commie I thought I was, because I liked the speech. Of course, I just read it, I didn't watch it, but I thought it was good. Don't hate me, Ken.

    Also, when has a SOTU in the modern era been anything OTHER than a lot of "optimistic pipe dreams and cheerleading for the beloved 'troops'"?

    1. V572625694

      It's hard to recall now, but there were a few years when our beloved troops were at home, or in their bloated garrisons in Germany and Korea, and not bombing browns. Thank goodness Chimpy put an end to that forever.

    1. BerkeleyBear

      And the small minded, sky is falling Ryan response (which only looked sane next to Shelly) and the immediate petty put downs by the GOP generally.

      Give the GOP this much credit – they seem to have given up on trying to match him either oratorically or in terms of vision, and just stick to the lying and mean girls schtick they do so well. Of course, that means Obama will get another term, but they'll at least make sure he does as little good as possible.

    2. baconzgood

      I couldn't even watch what she had to say. She's said soooo much stupid crap on the floor of Congress I can't imagine what happens when she mades a statment unconstrained by the Rules of the House.

      1. MarionNYNY

        I watched and my brainz will never be the same. I think by presenting herself as an actual elected official currently in office who was INVITED by someone else to speak in a place that wasn't her living room and featured a real chart, she's setting herself up as the TeaBagger Queen candidate with gravitas.

    3. PsycWench

      I couldn't bring myself to watch/listen but NPR this morning reported that she was determined to stare into the camera. However, she stared into the wrong camera.
      This in some way reminds me of my daughter who will sometimes assemble her clothing for the day with great care and then attempt to leave the house without making any contact with a hairbrush.

  2. Come here a minute

    Hooray Mr. President! Keep calling for budget restraint, belt tightening, austerity. (And keep spending like a drunken sailor.) Not only did it work for Bush, getting reelected was the only thing that worked for Bush. If Obama can pull off eliminating oil company subsidies and raising income taxes on the rich and still be seen as a friend to corporate interests, that would rival Bush's income tax giveaway being perceived as fiscal responsibility.

    And drunken sailors are what makes this country great. Support our drunken sailors and soldiers.

      1. SorosBot

        And here I thought we fought it because we thought we could conquer Canada while the Brits were distracted fighting our close ally, Napoleon.

    1. BerkeleyBear

      Stimulus, baby. Stimulus. San Francisco wasn't built on Rock n Roll as much as drunken sailors on liberty with a month's wages in their pockets.

    2. ttommyunger

      I beg your pardon! I have been a drunken Soldier and a drunken Marine on MANY occasions. We always spent OUR OWN FUCKING MONEY. I did not drink with Squids (Sailors) but can only assume they did likewise. Apology, please!

  3. MittsHairHelmet

    Last night I was wondering who that speech was directed towards. Focus Groups! I should've known.

  4. baconzgood

    Bonner hated it. He really couldn't hide his distain for having a black man more powerfull than him. How can a man in such a small demographic be so openly hostile to an black man? I've been to Dayton and there is absolutely no orange community there.

    1. twaingirl

      Yes but many of his constituents live in the richy rich suburb of West Chester (home of Cincinnati's only IKEA!!). When I moved to Cincy, I went to that Ikea and saw oompa loompas everywhere and as I left the parking lot I saw why–there was a tanning salon on every corner.

      1. StillGoinGreen

        The only dif between Cincy and the burbs here in Tejas is that there is a donut shop next to each tanning salon on each corner. Therefore, all of our oranganians really are bigger in Texas.

  5. BerkeleyBear

    Obama's not Dumbledore (not old enough), or really anyone from the crappy Hogwarts pantheon. I see him as some sort of Half-Elf out of Tolkein – he looks basically human, if a little lean, but he moves with unnatural grace, charms all around and seems to have an unerring composure/command of natural magic.

    1. vulpes82

      He better chose, then, whether to take on mortality as a human or go into the West as an elf before his gray gets any worse!

      1. BerkeleyBear

        Afraid the last ship already sailed on that one. Plus he's got a hot human wife and two adorable quarter-elfs to think about.

  6. MLHencken

    The SOTU is merely a construct to allow Michele Bachmann to the opportunity to look at the wrong camera and tell us how everything bad that has happened since 2008 is all Bammerz fault.

  7. Oblios_Cap

    Thanks for watching the pep rally Ken so that I didn't have to. I'm glad to see that a majority of idiots with landlines and no caller ID really liked O'bama's speech.

    1. StillGoinGreen

      I would have given the telephonic pollsters a thumbs up about our strong economy that Hopey Changey talked about – except I had to turn off my ringer so I don't have to deal with all the bill collectors calling. 92, huh? Isn't that the average credit score of working Amurrikkka?

    2. Trinket

      I am DELIGHTED to see this, because it is usually this same demographic that comprises, you know, the tea party and stuff.

        1. BerkeleyBear

          Oh, come on now – she's Dolores Umbridge and you know it – right down to the cat tchochkies and the deep desire to make little boys bleed.

          See, Barry's better than JK Rowling's twaddle, but I'm not.

  8. SorosBot

    Considering how some of the teabagger types believe magic actually exists, I can totally see some of them claiming that Obama really did put a spell (a voodoo spell, since they're also racists) on people to like him.

      1. SorosBot

        Or an invisible underground evil deity figure, who corrupts the youth through Dungeons and Dragons and Harry Potter, which teach kids to cast spells using evil power. This is what fundamentalists actually believe.

        1. genxr

          When your half-elf wizard character reaches 9th level, you get invited to join a real coven! But if you fail your saving throw you have to hang yourself in your bedroom. That's what makes AD&D fun for the whole family!

      1. BerkeleyBear

        Complete with the desire to say his name in a nasty way to establish their street cred.

        "I'm not afraid of Barack Hooossane Obamer. There, I said it." Strides away quickly, hoping no one notices the stain or odor in their trousers.

  9. PocketsTheClown

    He's actually pulling this centrist thing off? I gotta lay off the booze and pay attention.

    1. BarryOPotter

      You don't have to do both, just pay more attention to your surroundings. The good thing is that it could also lead to fewer embarrassing situations that start "Where the hell am I and who are you?"

  10. deanbooth

    she seemed almost like the telekinetic high school heroine of Carrie

    Did I miss the bucket of blood? Of police officers, maybe?

    1. BerkeleyBear

      Only if you can find one Lindsey Graham hasn't claimed for him and his Congressional Repressed Caucus (hard to get an exact head count with all the tapping, bobbing and ducking, but according to staffers there's quite a few).

  11. horsedreamer_1

    If previous regime collapses in Egypt are any guide, we will get some nice theatre out of it, at least.

  12. Scott_san

    I wonder how many of those 92% watched either of the GOP responses. Either the one from the rising star in the Republican Party who presented daring ideas that no-one with any power will sign on to . . . or the one from that crazy lady.

  13. freakishlywrong

    Anyone know what the current Conservative idiot du' jour Ryan said other than: "tax cuts, debts, deficits, hammocks, lazy browns". I couldn't take my eyes off his hairline. Dude has a serious Real Housewives of New Jersey vibe going on there. "Prostitution whooooorre!"

    1. StillGoinGreen

      No shit – dude's happy trail starts at his forehead and goes down to his eyebrows. Eddie Munster called and wants his do back!

    2. BerkeleyBear

      Day of Reckoning. Gotta have an Armageddon reference or people might actually not be scared into buying trickle down economics.

  14. metamarcisf

    Overall, it was a good speech. I was, however, surprised and disappointed that he didn't deal specifically with the mystery meat scandal over at Taco Bell.

    1. Barbara_i

      Barry is like a big beef mexi melt, a little soft on the outside, yet very appealing once you get down to the core.
      Palin is just the $5.00 box.

    1. hollywooddood

      The heavy, bad makeup and always being photographed with her mouth open is a teabaggers hot chick dream.

  15. mranthrope

    Longest sentence on a Wonkette post ever?

    "We are going to have to go with “magic,” because if all it takes is a decently presented State of the Union with a lot of optimistic pipe dreams and cheerleading for the beloved “troops” who continue to be stuck in two awful lost causes forever because the White House and Pentagon wants it that way, then magic is not limited to the wonderful world of Hogwarts and is now being practiced by our own “Hawaiian Dumbledore,” Barack Obama. "

      1. Ken Layne

        And now I see that I've got "wants" instead of "want" in there, which I've now corrected …. because I added "White House and" before "Pentagon" and didn't fix "wants." Stream of consciousness? Not exactly, I just like long crazy sentences, and sometimes I edit them to make 'em longer, as I did in this case.

  16. LiveToServeYa

    Hey, remember when Laughing George W. made Steroids In Baseball some sorta issue in a SOTU addy? Good times, good times. Now all we get are these goddammed space teachers.

      1. LiveToServeYa

        Yeah. That slacker, Barry, let human-animal hybrids get in congress and now it's run by an Orangeutan.

  17. ttommyunger

    Can't wait for Boehner and McConnell to start defending the poor helpless Oil Giants from Barry. The 'Merikan Peeples will sure get behind that shit; you betcha!

    1. finallyhappy

      I'm sorry- besides no trash talk about First Dog, BO- nothing but the highest praise and respect for Colin Firth. I think that about does it for my sensibilties on Wonkette.

  18. baconzgood

    WHAT? Someone gave me down fists? Down fisted me Baconzgood! ME!!! I'll have no part of those kinda shenanigans. I'm a funny man! Hey Mr. Down Fisty Troll Type Personage, you like apples?

    The jerk store just called, they're all out of YOU! How do you like dem apples NOW?

    (points to crotch)

    1. LiveToServeYa

      There. Thumbs up for ya. Your cries of outrage have touched my heart or sent a tingle up my leg.

  19. ManchuCandidate

    GOPer girls just seem to find out early
    How to open doors with just a tongue
    A failed Prenizt
    And she won't have to worry
    She'll get up in his face and go in deep

    Late at night the big old house gets lonely
    I guess every form of refuge has its price
    And it breaks her heart to think her love is
    Only given to a man with a brain as thick as shit

    So she tells him she must Teabag for the evening
    To comfort old white people who're feelin' down
    But he knows where she's goin' as she's leavin'
    She is headed for the crazy side of town

    You can't hide your crazy eyes
    And your smile is a thin disguise
    I thought by now you'd realize
    There ain't no way to hide your crazy eyes

  20. Mumbletypeg

    Meh. Felt like too much primrose-path schtick. The whole winning meme, so misleading and useless goading schools in Race to the Top, now slapped onto another slogan “Win the Future.”
    Win this win that. It’s that zero-sum pathology that reeks of hubris.
    I miss the sincerity and plausibility that for some reason I assumed would come with the promise Barry represented.

    This was the time to remember
    But it did not last forever
    Those were the days to hold onto
    We won’t although we’ll want to

    This is the time
    But time is gonna change, Hopey~
    You’ve given us the best of you;
    Now we’re stuck with the rest of you

      1. Mumbletypeg

        But exactly. Knowing our alternatives are limited, what I see happening is a President who, instead of making difficult decisions in keeping with his promises, is going against numerous principles he campaigned on because what else are we gonna do about it? That's too easy. Too many examples to list here:… Silence about our obligations w/ other world powers on climate change redress;..lining his panels-of-advisers with Geithners, Bernankes' & fat-cat CEOs while Elizabeth Warren's and Paul Volckers get deep-sixed… I just feel I got taken.

    1. GOPCrusher

      Despite my better judgment, I did view the speech and the Ryan rebuttal.
      Agree with your assessment on the entire "Win The Future" schtick. But, unfortunately, that's just the kind of thing that the modern American seems to lap up. Hence, the 92% approval rating. Maybe if Barry would have went with "Dancing With The Future", he could have hit 97%?
      But if you look beyond the schtick, he did manage to get some fairly good shots in on the Republiklans on some of their campaign rhetoric.
      This definetely is not the State Of The Union address that I would have liked to have seen at this point in Barry's Presidency, but considering the shape things are in now, I'll take it.

  21. mrblifil

    I would have appreciated the speech more had Barry been willing to brandish a Glock menacingly at the combined House chambers while spouting biblical verses a la Samuel L Jackson. And THEN he could have called out the shooting hero…

  22. NorthStarSpanx

    What was with all the big mind grape community college students in the chamber audience? We are an Exceptional Nation Obama, there you go again practicing apologetics – singing kumbaya and begging for foriners to let us keep our good hard workin jobs.

    Why didn't you put Bristol Palin in the audience? She's our future. And Willow also.

  23. SorosBot

    There's also the Gulf of Tonkin incident, "Remember the Maine!" and just plain lying about where the Mexico-Texas border was; America has quite a history of launching wars of conquest and selling them to populace using misleading or outright false propaganda.

  24. fuflans

    the superman song that comes to my mind this morning is the kinks – nine stone and cigarettes and all…

  25. m_supercomputer

    Ahaha, I just booked a trip to Egypt for March, so of course this happened. My record for disasters and unrest wherever I decide to go on vacation remains unbroken!

  26. Mariecohn

    God, Ryan seems to think that America is a country, not a continent, much the same way Alaskunt thinks about Africa. English *is* Marie's first language, and she still had a miserable time trying to understand him. He talked to fast. It's clear he's getting the playbill wrong. RR said it's morning in America. PR seems to think America should be in mourning. God.

  27. Pragmatist2

    Whoa! Whoa! Is Wonkette lampooning and regretting the fact that a few insipid and insincere words can get you what you want even though the last guy said pretty much the same thing and didn't deliver? My ENTIRE love life has been built on this notion and I don't want anyone attacking it.

  28. teebob2000

    The Egyptians ARE revolting! You ever stood next to one?? Sheesh!!!

    Except of course for my Mummy.

  29. ohgrateone

    Obama should have had different people in Michelle's SOU box: For example: PRES: Standing next to Michelle is Mike Cristal! Mike was a skilled aerospace sheet metal worker! Noe he drives a taxi! He did beautiful work, riveting sections of the Boeing 737 jet liner tail assembly! My friends at Boeing tell me that they are laying off 900 workers at the Boeing, Long Beach, California plant! You might ask….. can't we put Americans like Mike to work, building the 737 tails in Long Beach? THe answer is no…. because the complete tail assembly for each 737 is built in… CHINA!!! Including the US Navy's version of the aircraft, the P-8!
    That's right, fellow Americans, the tails section, including that big proud fin that says "US NAVY" on it, of every P-8, is built in China! The question is….. should Boeing keep skilled American aerospace workers like Mike employed at $24 an hour, or should the work on the US Navy planes be sent to Communist China, where workers are paid $3 an hour?
    That's the question all of us must face, and I will address it by repeating lots of touchy-feely feel-good words, but just like George Bush, don't expect me to do much about it!
    Keep up the good work, Mike!

  30. Negropolis

    I think with that comment by the NYT, they may have made their way back into my good graces, or at least back into the competition for my good graces.

    Carrie, indeed.

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