'Palestine Papers' Leak Causes Chaos; Whole World Now Leaking Away

 
 Will Al Jazeera be accused of "surprise sex" for its release of thousands of "Palestine Papers" detailing the dirty deals of the Middle East peace process? That's the question some blogger somewhere is probably writing a long post about, right now, as the world's governments groan and shudder like a weary whore under the weight of these endless document dumps. What have we learned about the Israel-Palestinian thirty-year back and forth over recognition and return and all that? Eh, everybody's corrupt and each government does little more than sell out its own people, ha ha, what did you think?

The Guardian and every other news outlet reports:  

The Palestinian Authority's anger over the leak of confidential documents about the stricken Middle East peace process is likely to be matched by outrage among many Palestinians at the revelation that their negotiators privately agreed that a token number of refugees, just 10,000 -- or100,000, depending on your news source! -- would be allowed to return to Israel.

There will also be anger that the chief PLO negotiator, Saeb Erekat, is recorded as referring to refugee rights as a "bargaining chip," and that he privately ruled out putting any final agreement to a referendum that would include Palestinian refugees in Lebanon and Jordan.

Haha, sorry Lebanese and Jordanian refugees living for generations in those slum camps! Sorry a lot! Also, how do you imagine those lucky duck 10,000 refugees would be chosen for repatriation in the new Palestinian State? There probably wasn't going to be any kind of grudge-taking or nepotism involved there, at all!

Here is a video about everybody going nuts everywhere:

Sources say Algeria and Egypt are next on the hit list -- Whose hit list? Planet Earth's hit list! -- and that after the Tunisian and Palestinian governments have totally finished crumbling, Israel's government will likely fall apart, followed by the aforementioned regimes in Algeria and Egypt, and then probably every other crooked leadership from Riyadh to Russia to Washington. (Ha ha, just kidding about Russia.) [ Guardian / Atlantic ]