Coy Loughner Upsets Political World By Being Registered Independent

The media are going to dig up information about Arizona alleged murdertard Jared Loughner until his every thought and last inane syllogism have been broadcast to the American public. A star has been born! (You really shouldn't give the youngs the satisfaction of instant fame for something like this. That's all 22-year-olds want. Learn this insight and more from the Internet's smartest rising young political blogger, Jack Stuef, who is on Twitter. ) Idiots of both partisan shades of excrement are trying to prove Loughner is a member of the other's political party, despite the now rampant evidence he just thinks in inane syllogisms about space shuttles. And unfortunately, he registered as an independent , which, for the hyper partisans out there, is his worst crime of all.

Suspected Tucson gunman Jared Lee Loughner registered as an independent voter in Arizona in the fall of 2006, according to the Pima County Registrar of Voters.

Loughner registered to vote on Sept. 29, 2006, identifying himself as an independent. Records show he voted in the 2006 and 2008 elections but is current listed as "inactive" on the state's voter roles -- meaning that he did not vote in November.

What an asshole! Throw the political media a bone, insane person who just allegedly murdered a bunch of people!

If we are to parse this, we would say that, because he didn't vote in 2010, he must not have liked John McCain very much:

If you like John McCain, you will vote for him when he comes up for election.

Loughner did not vote when he came up for election in 2010.

Therefore, Loughner did not like John McCain.

If you did not like John McCain, you would have voted for the other major candidate in the 2008 election.

Loughner did not like John McCain.

Therefore, Loughner voted for that Kenyan communist warthog.

See! That was fun and stupid. We sort of remember the novelty of doing those in college.

(In reality: Loughner probably licked his own name onto the ballot. Or wrote in "Loughner Buxx-brand currency.") [ WP ]