- A $2.2 billion “clean coal” plant in West Texas has received approval from the Texas Commission on Environmental Quality, which means Texas is one step closer to harnessing the awesome power of sulfurous pollution rocks like steampunk Zeppelin pilots used to power their phonographs, in 1880. THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS “CLEAN” COAL. It’s the same dirty coal that fills your lungs with soot; the same coal that is already powering half of America, and ruining everything. So hooray for Texas! It’s nice to see that someone paid attention to the multimillion dollar “alternative energy is of the Devil” disinformation campaign funded by Big Polluters. Meanwhile, probably in Germany, people are powering entire cities with lunar ray panels constructed out of recycled pizza boxes. C’mon, America. [McClatchy]
- Former Israeli president Moshe Katsav has been found guilty of multiple counts of rape and sexual assault, the end. [CNN]
- The Vatican has created a “financial watchdog agency” charged with overseeing all of the Vatican’s money laundering operations/child sex slave transactions. [NYT]
IT'S MORNING IN AMERICA
December 30, 2010
Texas ‘Clean Coal’ Will Finally Bring Twentieth Century Energy To America!
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{ 121 comments }
Well we need "clean" coal; it's not like the ultimate source of just about every form of energy on Earth (aside from nuclear power) shines right down on us for about half of every day and could easily power all of humanity's needs if we could just develop more efficient means of storing and using it or anything.
What about sexual energy?
Sorry about the typing – needed to use both hands.
"Orgone energy – It may not be clean but it'll 'get you off' of coal"™
$35 Million please, Energy Industry.
But the commercials say it's clean.
Sad thing is, even if they could figure out a way to make the burning of said coal actually "clean" the mining of it would still be a horrific land rape and highly effective killer of Appalachian men.
And, and, BP's logo is a cute little flower. I cute, little flower, I tell you!
Finally! Something to fuel my steampower locomotive engine! What next? A machine that removes seeds from the cotton fibers? Ha!
Who needs a machine? Isn't that what the slaves are for? Ain't the 1800's grand?
Ah, the early 1800s…when States' Rights were respected…specifically the right to own people as property.
Keep dem gubmint hands offa mah propertay!
Ahh, yes. "Clean" coal. Brought to you by the same ruinous assholes that referred to the toxic mess in the Gulf as "food mousse".
Hide the money boys, the lawsuits aint gonna stop.
The Vatican has created a “financial watchdog agency” charged with overseeing all of the Vatican’s money laundering operations/child sex slave transactions.
Yippee! A new Office of the Inquisition! I just loved the work of the last one…
We'll never expect the new Inquisition!
(Obvious, but someone had to say it).
The Inquisition still exists; it's just called the "Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith" or something like that now. Funnily enough, Nazi Pope was in charge of it before becoming Pope.
Naturlich.
Mmmmm, steampunked phonographs.
Me mum used to talk about when she was a kid in Wilmette, IL yellow wasn't so much the problem with eating snow. Rather, by day two the soot from all the coal that everyone was burning to heat their homes would have turned the white snow gray. Musta been cause Wilmette was so close to the Gary, IN steel mills.
Clean Coal brought to us by Summit Power? Let's look at Summit for a moment:
"The chairman of Summit, Donald P. Hodel, served as Secretary of Energy and Secretary of the Interior under President Ronald Reagan. The Arizona-based Center for the Study of Carbon Dioxide and Global Change, a global-warming denier group funded by ExxonMobil, lists Hodel as a science adviser."
So, a right-wing arsehole that used to fuck everyone over for Reagan now runs a shitty polluter that wins large Texas contracts. Surprise sur-fucking-surprise.
They say everything is bigger in Tejas even the coal plants, but also the stupid… especially the stupid.
Coal being clean is like water being dry.
I keep several 55-gallon drums of dehydrated water in my survival kit. Are you telling me I shouldn't have listened to my Mormon elders when I purchased the full 6 month kit?
From the articles, it looks like drying out water takes about the same effort – and with the same effect – as cleaning coal.
Per Popular Mechanics, to clean 1 pound of coal, you must remove and store 2.5 pounds of CO2. Sounds like a common sense solution if I ever heard one.
Ah, carbon sequestration. It works, but it costs eleventy billion dollars per pound of coal.
I'm sure since it's Texas they will put the plant where only the messicans are downwind from it. Yeehaw!
Hey, I'm from Texas, and I resent that!
So long as the only people downwind from it are poor, we don't care what color they are.
Purty soon they'll all be brown, anyhoo.
Since we're talking West Texas, they already are.
A big story here in Texas right now concerns huge swaths of dead trees surrounding coal-burning plants. Nowhere in the news articles, however, is the mention of the effect on human life, which I'm certain is significant. So I, for one, am glad to see another coal-burning plant get the green light. At least there aren't as many trees or people to kill out in West Texas.
Maybe they could re-locate to a more populous area.
Yes, a reason to be optomistic!
Those trees died out of jealousy, what with coal being so "clean" nowadays, while trees are, as Ronald Reagan said, the #1 source of air pollution. Really, Texas is better off without them.
Hey we're talking about pecan trees there, and that's the ONLY reason it's in the news.
We Texans never let human life get in the way of profit, but you don't mess with our pecan pie!
So, the Texas Commission on Environmental Quality wreaks its revenge on the earth for letting the EPA take over licensing of the state's CO2 discharges, just because it refused to do it. Well played TCEQ. Fuck you earth.
So, Moshe, Silvio, & Vladimir walk into a bar…
Shit. Someone told me they were in a life raft.
And all three of them grab their dicks and say "Ow!" 'cause it's a very low-hanging bar.
And every woman in a 2000 foot radius suddenly feels an urge to give up drinking and/or sex with men forever. Nun recruitment spikes locally.
The Catholic Church immediately hails it as a miracle.
Ecumenical! One Catholic, One Jew, One Orthodox.
Shouldn't we give Texas back to its rightful owner, Mexico?
~
That would be fine. ¡Recuerden el Cottonwood!
But we ain't finished fucking it up forever! (Close, but . . . )
Since Texas ultimately lost it's raison d'être, that it's even still a state is a surprise.
More liberal media — the story puts the phrase "clean coal" in "scare quotes" every time. Damnit, if Texas says it is clean, it must be clean! Near zero emissions! This was stated by the Summit Energy Chairman and Reagan Administration Secretary of Energy, so who could possibly doubt it? I demand clean coal be cleaned of it's quotation marks.
Coal is clean and ketchup is a vegetable, got it.
Correct — also, space shield will save us from nuclear kaboom.
And the best way to fight the Communists is giving weapons and money to that Osama bin Laden fellow.
Former Israeli president Moshe Katsav has been found guilty of multiple counts of rape and sexual assault, the end.
And yet GWB and Cheney still roam the Earth as free men.
There is no God.
Or, maybe, the Right-wing God is the Only God.
Bill Clinton was almost gotten for a sex-crime, too — while Bush's deeds (non-sexual) go not just unpunished, but unremarked.
War: glorious!
Sex: dirty, bad, criminal, embarrassing
How many times is it necessary to explain this? Particularly when movies dripping w/gore are rated OK FINE! for kids, but movies w/naked boobs are BAD, NO KIDZ ALLOWED!
No naked boobs, and saying "fuck" more than once which just destroys kids' minds for some reason.
Especially that ghey sex.
Nice catch Riley – but your url still has "engery" in the title. I am now officially a pain in the ass.
B-B-But there's no money in solar! once you set it up, there's nothing but maintenance and distribution costs. You don't get free access to federal land for nothing and then destroy it and sell the coal for munnies. Solar just ain't economically viable. Unless there's a way for bidness people to get stuff for nearly nothing and manipulate markets to turn a buck and get airplanes and limos and estates and stuff, alternative energy just won't fly in Amurika.
I understand that, in the early 1900"s, Tesla had a plan to transmit energy wirelessly. His backers shut the project down, because they could not work out how to install the meters.
To be fair, as long as they're blowing the tops of mountains off to get it, what could go wrong?
Mountains? Texas? HeHe!
It's cheap, easy, and fun too!
Then ship it cross-country via our ponderously slow rail system, got it.
I'm just glad that, here in Pennsylvania, our new Governor-to-be has pledged to make sure that the energy companies will be allowed to use the process called fracking to mine natural gas, and without any big government controls like safety regulations or having to pay any taxes whatsoever. And the only price to pay is that it will contaminate our water so that the entire state will get cancer. Yay!
Jesus, you guys are going ahead with that? Cuomo the Younger flirts with the idea here in NY, although we unwashed voters DID get to see the spectacle of an aging Black Panther schooling his white ass on what hydro fracking actually was.
Yep; the voters of PA, in our lack of wisdom, along with electing a Senator who is basically the second coming of the embarrassing mix of lube and fecal matter we finally dumped four years ago, chose as Governor the corrupt Attorney General who liked to abuse his power to harass bloggers who criticized him and is a fully brought and paid subsidiary of the energy industry.
And, as a nice side dish, you'll get all those water haulers driving up and down your neighborhoods – killing your school children. like they do here in Texas. Hell, we've replaced the neighborhood jungle gym (too dangerous!!) with the Chesapeake Energy approved Natural gas well (fun to swing on until it blows up your neighborhood!).
Well the actual fracking will be going on out in Pennsyltucky, home of the assholes who elect the cretins that ruin the state for us here in Philly; so those trucks killing the locals would be an upside.
Clean and coal go together about as well as intelligent and teabagger.
"Texas Commission on Environmental Quality"
(That's a phrase I never thought I'd see.)
I wonder what projects they've rejected. Perhaps that Ft Worth puppy-to-steam plant because of noise concerns. Maybe the canal filled with baby tears due to land-use objections from the porn shops along the route. They must have denied the Dubya Bush Library permit over the stench his presidential papers would pump into the air.
OPEC was organized along the lines of the Texas Railroad Commission. That state body regulates oil and gas because it moves through pipelines. When the oil countries decided to form a monopoly that was their blueprint.
Clean Coal. Oh, Clean is an acronym:
Cocksuckers
Lying
Egregiously
Again
Naturally
OT, but Xtine O'donell's campaign manager's name is Matt Moran. I shit you not.
And she says Biden's out to get her! As if everybody didn't already know that.
Is he the same as Pudding Cup Guy?
Nope, there can be only one pudding cup guy. Accept no imitations.
You have to admit, the Vatican are experts at handling assets.
You mean "assettes" — young boys' butts.
Yes, that is what I meant. I just didn't want God giving me ED for saying it. I have plans for the weekend.
The reason that Texans support this is that their history books told them that Jesus used coal burning tanks to invade Iran.
Clean coal: it's the new miracle substance. It' so clean you can brush your teeth with it. Drop a lump of it in the washing machine and it'll remove even the toughest stains. A lump in the toilet tank will ensure your toilet bowl stays clean for months instead if weeks. Add a couple of lumps to your power washer and anything you spray will emerge mildew-free and sparkling. Wait! Don't throw out those old tennis shoes! Rub 'em with clean coal and watch them return to a like-new state! There's just nothing that clean coal can't make cleaner! So get your clean coal today. First 500 callers get a second box of clean coal, completely free!*
*Claims made in this ad have not been verified by the FDA… or anybody, for that matter.
well, if it can remove "some" of the toughest stains, count me in.
The irony about the West Texas plant is that they could power the whole frickin region with wind power. Have you been out there? Constant wind pretty much, and not just that emanating from their politicians and preachers. No real trees to speak of, either. A West Texas tree is what most of the rest of us call a shrub.
Regarding the Israeli President, aren't all the young people in that country required to do military service? Both men and women. Too bad he didn't run into a woman who kicked his arse in a particularly embarrassing manner.
They could power the entirety of West Texas with one 120v extension cord!
She did, that's exactly the story. And good for her!
Wind will never be economically viable. Have you seen the price of wind on the Texas Enron Energy Exchange lately?
Need to conflate these stories – "Scientists in West Texas Announce Radically New Clean Power Source in Sexual Energy – Vatican Objects"
Seriously, strap some kind of kinetic energy recapture device to Silvio Berlusconi's ass, supply him with a truck load of underage prostitutes and you could probably supply Italy's power needs well into the next century.
"Vatican objects" are a radically clean sexually energetic power source? Who knew?
Wait, what are "Vatican objects" again? Oh, altar boys.
As long as we don't use up all the wind in TX, cause, that might happen
p.s. why do I think "its a Katsav" will be new a new jeebberish phrase
We, ye Proprietors of ye Invention for Raising Water by Fire, hath heard of this Substance yclept "Coal" with great Interest, for our Invention hath laboured too long by ye Burning of Wood, which produceth a rather inefficient Quantum of Heat.
Don't worry everyone i am studying alchemy i will create cold fusion! or gold from lead, anyway its a correspondence course so just got to wait for the mail.
Who will be in charge of the Vatican financial watchdog agency?
I picture Elizabeth Warren as a bad-ass nun.
What was the question again?
Why does the name Texas City keep popping into my head?
The term "Clean Coal" makes as much sense as "Commonsense Conservative"
Or the now-infamous "compassionate conservative."
Rick Perry wants to clean your coal balls, America.
At least Moshe K. can state with finality that he doesn't work for the Vatican, as many had suspected. Grownups, and women no less? C'mon!
I'll believe in clean coal just about when I become convinced cutting taxes raises government revenues.
It also creates jobs – don't forget that.
When I lived in Texas, I recall a friend of mine referring to Beaumont-Port Arthur and Orange, TX as "The Stinky Triangle".
I loves me some stinky triangle, every night and mos' every mornin' too. Maybe I oughta move down there.
Oh, wait, it's Texas.
Ron White (the drinking man's comic) got sued for pointing out Pt.Arthur smells terribleowing to the numerous paper plants. Truth is a complete defense though, so they can suck it.
Smells like Kaukauna.
There is a reason why my grandma changed her coal burning furnace to gas. Guess what it is.
Clean coal in Texas…that is about the funniest thing I'ver ever heard. Clean coal in Texas means that the plant is built in the middle of nowhere so nobody (except the employees) will die within the first five years of operation.
To be fair, they're adopting this energy plan now because the team of slaves riding the Gilligan's Island-style bicycles to provide power are getting tired….
They're getting deported! Lousy Obama border enforcement. Why didn't he just build a giant fence and be done with it?
"Clean coal" is what Santa puts in the stockings of bad children who pretend to be good.
Before we all get high and mighty, Dems love coal too. Dick Durbin, for one, just loves getting Federal dollars for CO2 sequestration research (the sleight of hand that makes coal burning seem low emission even as it potentially poisons everyone for miles around).
Coal power was supposed to be dying 40 years ago – the Supreme Court even said so, in a case that coal companies still use to defend acquiring huge amounts of market power. People are so fucking clever, finding new ways to kill themselves for money.
Every issue has its proponents and opponents. Any attempt to define an issue in terms of left vs right is an attempt to replace the actual definition of that issue with a contrived political definition, because arguing "us vs them" is a helluva lot easier than arguing "300ppm vs 500ppm."
We now return you to your regularly scheduled snark.
Let those NOT guilty of rape, assault, child pornography, child sex slave trafficking throw the first stone.
Dang. You got me there. I guess I have some soul searching to do when I get back to the ol' sex slave transit center.
How come all the windows in Israel and Vatican City are smashed?
Yours was one of many recent comments with 0p; it looks like the silent troll has struck again.
Jack, you're being awfully generous. This is actually Texas working hard at bringing us into the ninteenth century. See also: Republican economic and social policies.
After a perusal of the Vatican article it has become clear just why the Catholics are so keen on diddling the altar boys. It is illegal to pollute the soil of the Vatican, punishable with a fine of 52,000 euros. Priests are men, too, and have needs. Gotta spill that seed somewhere, and it's illegal to just let it fall on the ground.
Texans just have a huge itch to burn all things black.
Texas… America's Taint.
I wish they would install Rick Perry's yap over the top of the smokestack and let him breath it for a while if it's so clean.
So coal-generated electric power is easier to move than wind-generated electric power? Is it lighter and smaller because it's so clean – so they can put more of it in trucks and ship it?
Uh no. They build power plants near population centers so that they don't have to transport the electricity gazillions of miles. Unfortunately you can't just build a wind farm where there are population centers – you have to build them where there is wind. And if there aren't enough people there to use the electricity generated then it just goes to waste. It sucks that we aren't investing in electricity storage technology on a large scale, because until we do wind will not be the viable solution that it could be.
The power plant they're building is in West Texas. So is this a sort of Mom and Pop clean coal plant – throw a little more clean coal on, Mother, Alice and Jimmy are turning on the porch light….
Waco (which is where this plant is slated to go) is not exactly West Texas, unless you're from Houston. It will serve the Dallas/Ft Worth area, which is close to Waco. The wind farms are in true west texas, like the wasteland between Lubbock and Juarez, where there are no people. Look, I'm not defending the coal plant – I think it sucks. I wish that we would look for ways to store and transmit clean energy rather than wasting resources building this very expensive, dirty plant.
The Time mag article from the link was prophetic: "But now the idea of clean coal might be truly dead, buried beneath the 1.1 billion gallons of water mixed with toxic coal ash that on Dec. 22 burst through a dike next to the Kingston coal plant in the Tennessee Valley and blanketed several hundred acres of land, destroying nearby houses." Jan. 10, 2009.
Clean coal? Cool. Now, we can declare victory against black lung disease. Of course we will have to fight the new clean lung disease.
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