$1.1 Trillion Spending Bill Greased Up and Ready To Fund Dumb Government

Crisis has been averted: The government will probably not shut down at the end of the week, because Democrats put together a giant spending omnibus thing that will fund it for the next fiscal year. And what's in the omnibus? Nobody really knows, but it's all greased up and seems to have been cooked well, if you just look at its skin. "That's an omnibus," a senator probably said, looking at the giant stack of 1,924 pages. "Very omnibus. Let's just go ahead and pass it. It's making me hungry looking at it. Omnibus!" $1.1 trillion seems like a nice, round, debt-padding number, so it likely will be passed. Even though John Thune says it looks pretty evil to him.

"The attempt by Democrat leadership to rush through a nearly 2,000-page spending bill in the final days of the lame-duck session ignores the clear will expressed by the voters this past election," Thune said in a statement. "This bill is loaded up with pork projects and should not get a vote. Congress should listen to the American people and stop this reckless spending.”

John Thune is probably just mad that he didn't stick any pork in there for himself. Throw in a couple of pages! Nobody will notice.

But no worries:

Despite strong opposition from Thune and Senate GOP Leader Mitch McConnell (Ky.), several Senate Republicans are considering voting for the bill.

“That’s my intention,” said retiring Sen. Bob Bennett (R-Utah) when asked if he would support the package.

Bennett said earmarks in the bill might give some of his GOP colleagues reason to hesitate but wouldn’t affect his vote.

“It will be tough for some, but not for me,” he said.

Omniiiiiiibus. It's a pile of delicious-smelling bacon-infused money. Who doesn't want that? Republicans begrudgingly agree that they want government to happen.

And thus the great empire continues for another year. "Auld Lang Syne" that shit. [ The Hill ]