Roland Burris To Be the Best Mayor of Chicago Ever

  chiseling the mausoleum

Supporters of Roland W. Burris, who is packing up his United States Senate office this week to come home to Chicago, have filed the necessary paperwork so that he may seek the city’s top job. [...]

Mr. Burris, who was appointed to finish the senate term of Barack Obama, was approached this fall, his aides say, by supporters who collected 20,000 signatures on his behalf. Mr. Burris, who is already hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt for legal fees related to his somewhat rocky tenure in the senate, has yet to decide whether he really will pursue the mayor’s job, the aides said.

This election is going to be a half-moldy deep-dish pepperoni pizza, and the media is going to have egg on its face for following all the big-name politicians who are opposing Rahm. [NYT]

Share This
 
Related video

About the author

Jack Stuef is your loyal editor and a freelance satirist or something like that. He is a contributing writer for The Onion. E-mail him or whatever.

View all articles by Jack Stuef